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I Cant Stop Cutting

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 244 People

    Cutting Is My Only Addiction.

    it is, really. I've convinced myself I could stop. I went to a rehabilitation center...and when I got out, I started cutting deeper. I cannot stop for the life of me. I need help:/
    daniXdead daniXdead 16-17, F 6 Responses Oct 23, 2007

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    I Love How Blood Looks On Skin

    I've been cutting for 17 years now... And the point of cutting has evolved over the years. It used to be a childish cry for attention a young kid would do. And now, it's become an art, a beautiful ritual. I rate the need to cut from 1 - 13. And i never cut myself more than 13...
    pulomas pulomas 26-30, F 2 Responses Jan 18, 2011

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    Things Change..

     It has been quite a while since I have last been on this site. I looked back at the story I had written here, one of the first stories posted on this page actually. So much has changed since that day. I had gotten much worse with my cutting for a short while, my wounds...
    prettylikedrugs prettylikedrugs 18-21, F 2 Responses Aug 9, 2011

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    Not Worth It..

    When I was about 5 years old, my brother started molesting me. This went on for a few years, until I finally began threatening to tell someone about it. All throughout elementary school, I was teased and harrased verbally by all my other classmates. My brother beat me up nearly...
    MarinaXmisery MarinaXmisery 16-17, F 3 Responses Oct 12, 2010

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    Cutting

    I cut for a while and well still am but I met my Best friend through it I don't know what to do but I know that if I do it again I will hurt everyone I love and I can't do that again. I guess I should start in the beginning...ok so it started as a what if I cut type thing then...
    Adarksmile Adarksmile 22-25, F Jun 14, 2013

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    My Razors

    Razors are my best friends and my worst enemies. They do the cleanest cuts. They get addicting. They are always there when I need them, whether they are in my back pocket or in a pencil sharpener on my desk. For me its always one cut, two cuts, three cuts, floor. I do it almost...
    kalliethorn kalliethorn 18-21, F Jul 15, 2013

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    Never Understood

    I've never fully understood why I do it, why I've been unable to stop no matter how hard I try. I've had my brushes with addiction before but never anything like this. Alcohol wasn't that hard to overcome when I saw what it was doing to me. Pills were all to easy to avoid...
    AtraeDeum AtraeDeum 22-25, M Sep 7, 2009

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    This Life...

    I have been cutting since 8th grade and I started because of a boy just being stupid. Then it turned into so much more. It gave me a relief I had never experienced and I loved it, therefore I did it more. My friends knew about it but didnt care, I found out later a few of them...
    SecretSpirit SecretSpirit 22-25, F 2 Responses May 1, 2011

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    Wont Stop

    Hi, I've been cutting for 3 years now. I stopped for one month but then relapsed. I still cut almost every day. Whenever I want to cut I just get an image in my head which is my wrists bleeding non-stop. I honestly don't want to stop and I think it feels great. But if you don't...
    ImNotHigh ImNotHigh 18-21 Jun 27, 2012

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    Ground Hamberger

    I have been cutting since I am 16 years old, I am now 59. Some people say that it releases the pressure. For me, I do it now because I am always in pain, I have fibromyalgia and severe arthritis, and the pain can get to me. Tonight I cut again, Both arms. I was hoping to take the...
    shreadedarms shreadedarms 56-60 2 Responses Jul 7, 2008

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    Am I A Loser? Crazy?

    I'm a 37 year-old man- I've never cut before in my life but started a few weeks ago. I like to take those medium size binder clips, pinch my skin (usually upper arms or upper thighs) and then use a serrated steak knife to press into my skin or saw on the pinched skin. Why? 1. It...
    guyinny guyinny 36-40, M 1 Response Aug 23, 2012

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    My Self Harm Addiction

    I'm 16, my name's Imogen and I've been cutting since i was about 12. The first couple of years i wasn't cutting too deep or too frequently, but in the last year it's been really bad. I've attempted suicide before and I've unintentionally cut too deep on my wrist. I'm having a...
    Ivtv Ivtv 16-17 1 Response Nov 28, 2011

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    A Beautiful Release

    Hey there, I decided to join this particular group because i'm fairly sure I have an addiction to cutting myself. I have yet to seek treatment on this particular issue, mainly because I have never stuck out seeing a therapist before. So I am writing about it. I started cutting...
    kat1594 kat1594 18-21, F Jan 25, 2013

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    Bad Habit

      /START-EDIT/ I'm actually really proud to say that I haven't cut in over three months. (: /END-EDIT/    I always have; I don't know why. I guess it's my way to deal with things. Some smoke, some drink, some do other things; and I do this...
    M0RGUE M0RGUE 18-21, F 5 Responses May 2, 2008

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    Too Old To Be Starting This But Here I Am....

    I'm a 43 mother of two with a great job, no mortgage, nice husband but all of a sudden I'm starting to cut myself. I did 6 cuts today and I keep looking at them, two are bleeding but the other 4 are just raised and sore. No one will believe me but I'm looking at them with pride...
    sensfan sensfan 41-45 Nov 23, 2012

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    The Way It Helps.

    When people find out you cut they ethier look at you werid, make fun of you, worry, or tell someone else. No one can truely know how it feels unless they have done it before. Cutting is used at a release, a way to stop the pain or feel alive. Yes theyre is a case where a person...
    sadnessneverends sadnessneverends 16-17 6 Responses Jul 21, 2010

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    I Think I've Crossed The Line

    I am someone who has a good idea of what I'm doing and when, but I don't feel like I am anymore. At first I did it ever once in a long time. Then, it became more frequent. I became addicted to what I've labeled 'Blood Highs.' That's basically when I lose so much blood that I...
    Aonair16 Aonair16 16-17, F 2 Responses Feb 3, 2012

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    Cutting...sorry Couldn't Think Of A Better Title!

    So I'm a 17 yr old male and I watch **** a lot. On average every second  night. And I'm usually the nice quiet boy that does all his work. Im really respectful to every girl I know, and they say the same. But every time I go to bed, I automatically bring out my laptop. And now...
    Shadowofmylife Shadowofmylife 16-17 Jun 16, 2012

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    None Stop Cutting & Scared From Stop Cutting !!!!!

    every day I start my morning I tell my self that I will do something I always want to do, but I'm scared to ask how or assist. Also, I cant be social person, every time I tray to contact with someone I know recently I just feel nerves and try to just Finnish the conversation...
    Darwinx Darwinx 18-21 Dec 10, 2012

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    I Don't Want To Stop

    I mean I want to stop for my friends sake, but I don't want to stop for me. My friend is as severely depressed as i am and it'll make her happy if I stop. But I just can't do it. I don't even really want to. She cares so much and I'd do anything for her. But I can't stop cutting...
    AlleyFreakingKat AlleyFreakingKat 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 24, 2012

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    Text Me Help Me Im Hurting Self Harm Is What Seems To Be Helping 612~810~8339

    hey im nikki meyer i was born jan 23 my heart is broken lord whe have u betrayed me cutting is the only way to hide the hurt and pain i dont know who i am all i want to do is sleep all day my life is tumblin down i cannot run from the higer level of authority i shall not run...
    nicnac43 nicnac43 13-15, F 1 Response Oct 9, 2010

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    Volunteers Needed For A Research Study On Self Injury

    Share your experience- Help increase understanding about self-injury! Have you intentionally cut yourself in the last 30 days? We invite you to share your experience by participating in a short online study. The purpose of this research is to examine health factors related to...
    ODUResearcher ODUResearcher 26-30, F May 21, 2012

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    Stop Cutting You Devil Child!

    Me? Kirk Cutter? yes how long? 17 years Regret it? YES This is a note to all the cutters on these boards. I know everyone has problems and depression, anxiety, self hate or self disappointment, lonesomeness, and stress. Maybe one or maybe all but after all these years i have...
    ppnhli ppnhli 31-35, M May 24, 2012

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    The Never-ending Cycle

    I can't quite remember when it started, I just know that I was young. I had to of only been a child when I started scratching myself out of anger. I didn't know how to release all these over-bearing emotions. I started using objects (scissors, knives, etc) when I was 12. I'd...
    Honehe Honehe 19-21, F 4 Responses Oct 20, 2007

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    Reminiscence

    I still remember, getting teased the first month of school. "You're such an idiot, why are you even allowed in a school?" They would muse. That day I cried myself to sleep. I still remember, the days I came home crying. I secret wished in my heart that my mom would make me feel...
    dontworryimfine dontworryimfine 18-21 May 2, 2013

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    Video

    I'm doing a YouTube video about self harm awareness. I would really, really appreciate anyone who would be willing to help me. I'm a self harmer myself but I think I could really benefit from making a video about it. I want to help people and I really believe this could be the...
    amysfc95 amysfc95 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 23, 2012

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    Uh.. Kinda New..

    so uh.. yeah.. not really much to say. im a cutter obviously. just something thats always controlled my life i guess. some people have pot or other drugs, but i prefer a razor blade i guess..
    KatTastrophy KatTastrophy 18-21, F Jul 22, 2011

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    I Cant Stop

    I cant stop cutting i have tried and nothing works i dont know what to do i have been cutting for 3 years how can i stop
    dorothy66 dorothy66 19-21, F 4 Responses Jan 16, 2008

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    Can You Be Addicted To Cutting?

    I think it is possible and that very notion caught me off guard. I've cut off and on since I was 12 but I used to burn myself when I was younger. I didn't realize how heavily dependent I was on it until my boyfriend made me stop. I can't stop thinking about it. Just days after...
    SilencedSongbird SilencedSongbird 18-21, F Jul 13, 2013

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    Scars

    The scars are memories now, marks on my arms that remind me of my darkest times. They remind me of times when I was weak and couldn't stand on my own. They remind my of the crutch that cutting once was. Now they're the past, and now I'm better. Now I'm me again.
    Chelsea56 Chelsea56 18-21, F Aug 4, 2013

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    Feel Like A Loser- Cutting At Age 37

    I'm a 37 year-old man- I've never cut before in my life but started a few weeks ago. I like to take those medium size binder clips, pinch my skin (usually upper arms or upper thighs) and then use a serrated steak knife to press into my skin or saw on the pinched skin. Why? 1...
    guyinny guyinny 36-40, M Aug 21, 2012

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    Random Poem

    a tiny drop a long line ever redder all with time winding down wet and hot have you found that which you sought the line goes deeper the drops come fast senses heighten how long will it last one last stroke one final time fleeting thoughts darkness, sublime!
    blackrain306 blackrain306 22-25, F Apr 17, 2011

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    I Wish I Could Stop!

    I quit cutting for about a month and a half and then somthing pushed me to breaking apart a razor and cutting.  Everyone, friends, family all want me to "just stop" as they say. and they ask me why dont i just stop, and i can never find an answer for them besides...
    ifeelsoalone ifeelsoalone 16-17, F 17 Responses May 22, 2007

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    I Just Need Somebody To Talk To.

    I'm 14 years old and I'm just so depressed. I cut myself because I don't feel like I'm good enough for anybody. My parents don't know and I don't want them to. I wish people could like me for who I am. I'm not lesbian, gay or bi. But everyone thinks I am. I'm not fat. I have...
    ineedsomebodytolove ineedsomebodytolove 13-15 8 Responses Jun 16, 2012

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    I Can't Stop

    I'm trying to quit that cutting thing and I cut again. From first I felt incredible, amazing. and now I'm crying and feeling worthless. I hate myself that I can't control my actions. I just wanna don't cut anymore... I wanna be free...
    TheAgnes TheAgnes 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 27, 2012

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    I Swear It Was Over.

    really did. i hadnt done it for so long.. not that i was happy again.. i just thought i had found different ways to cool my jets. but i hadnt. and now its worsee.
    sarcasticsmile sarcasticsmile 16-18, F 7 Responses Sep 15, 2007

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    Addiction

    i hav these constant urges 2 cut myself, i no wer all my blades r n if 1 goes missin i strt 2 panic. my family n friends want me 2 stop, they tell me to find new ways 2 cope but coping isnt tha problem, i'm addicted, feeling the pain, seeing the blood. i fight so hard 2 not cut...
    IcclexAngel IcclexAngel 18-21 Aug 29, 2008

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    Who Am I?????

    I love to help others an harm myself in the process I'm so busy trying to fix those around me that I feel invisible I self medicate to stop from hurting myself I have a nine your old that knows when to tell me to take my Xanax who does that? I just helped my neighbor go to the...
    sassy124u2 sassy124u2 41-45, F Jun 13, 2013

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    I Can't Stop...

    I haven't read all the stories here, but I know I started doing it before people were aware this was a problem. I don't even know how or why I did it for the first time. All i know is it gave me comfort. I think seeing me bleed, made the hurt I felt inside real. I am scarred...
    Rainyweed Rainyweed 31-35 Oct 13, 2012

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    Need Texting Buddy

    I'm an 18-year-old girl from MA. I am struggling w/ cutting, food issues, & depression. I just want a real actual person around ny age & from the U.S. to text about this & help one another out. I think it will help having a person that I completely don't know be able to step in...
    needsafriend24 needsafriend24 18-21 1 Response Jul 22, 2012

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    Nothing Special

    I was born someone that no one really noticed. I grew up not really knowing who I was and not really expecting anyone to teach me. I was born to two people who had no real business raising children at that point in their lives. Two years after they had me they decided they needed...
    Chelsea56 Chelsea56 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 2, 2013

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    Self Harm Is Just For Teenagers?

    Feeling like im trapped, and have no control over anything in my life. Depression has been slowly working its way around me for several months. Ive tried to escape, tried running from it.. but i just cant get away. Today, I feel my cuts. I dont need to cut again yet. The ones I...
    beautifulbrokendoll beautifulbrokendoll 31-35, F Nov 16, 2013

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    Please, Take the Time..

    So, i know alot of you reading this don't want to stop cutting, nor take the time to listen to some girl tell you how wrong it is. Cutting has ruined my life, i lost my true love from it, lost my friendship, lost my love for life and love for God. I had been cutting since i was...
    CaitlynBec CaitlynBec 16-17, F Sep 11, 2009

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    Here It Comes Again...

    I'm 41. Been cutting on & off since I was 14. First time I told someone about it was after having me kids & went through post natal depression both times. Had great support from GP, Health Visitor & CPN (Community Psychiatric Nurse). Had psychotherapy with my partner. Just had a...
    tramaziparty tramaziparty 41-45 1 Response Jul 21, 2011

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    Damn.

    I am not totally sure why I looked up this group today. I have written stories on other topics on this site before but, I guess I went looking for somthing else. I ended up looking up cutting groups to read stories and maybe lend a hopefully some what helpful...
    ChangingCurrents ChangingCurrents 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 18, 2009

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    Cutting:i Tired It Once And I Couldnt Stop

    I am a 22 year old female ive been cutting since i was about 13. ive always been different. and cutting was the only outlet that i found that made waking up a lil easier in the morning. cuz i knew that if i had an issue i could just sneak away for a lil while and release my anger...
    AwfullyIronic AwfullyIronic 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 27, 2012

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    Hell

    i started cutting when i was 14,i am now 27 and i still cut. i am not sure why i began to cut.i guess that it was to relive the emotional pain i am going though.i was abused by my family member.i stopped for a year but i recently started cutting daily again.
    grizziebear22 grizziebear22 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 22, 2013

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    Its Happening Again...

    I cut when i was a teenager. I stopped. I cut after my son died. Just once. I stopped. Today. I cut again.
    beautifulbrokendoll beautifulbrokendoll 31-35, F Nov 15, 2013

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    Need Texting Buddy

    I'm an 18-year-old girl from MA. I am struggling w/ cutting, food issues, & depression. I just want a real actual person around ny age & from the U.S. to text about this & help one another out. I think it will help having a person that I completely don't know be able to step in...
    needsafriend24 needsafriend24 18-21 Jul 22, 2012

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    Volunteers Needed For A Research Study On Self Injury

    Share your experience- Help increase understanding about self-injury! Have you intentionally cut yourself in the last 30 days? We invite you to share your experience by participating in a short online study. The purpose of this research is to examine health factors related to...
    ODUResearcher ODUResearcher 26-30, F May 21, 2012

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    I Tried

    I started to cut when I was 12. It all started when I was influence by my friend. It continued until when I was 13 because I started to get depressed. My life got dark. I became a lost kid. I didn't know anymore what I do. I got crazy partying and drinking and do some stupid...
    kmisfit123 kmisfit123 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 14, 2013

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    I Always Fail To Explain Why.

    I've got more scars then I can count from years of cutting. The lighter ones have faded so only I know they are there. But the others, the ones I'm ?proud? of, will never go away. For the most part I don't cut anymore. Sometimes I give in, but it has gotten less and less. I...
    crowseye crowseye 26-30, M 2 Responses Jul 25, 2011

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    Please Stop Cutting!!!

    It's not just teens who do this.  I'm 38, lost 25 lbs. and look great! Went from 12 to size 2!  I have a great marriage to my high school hottie (he found me after 15 years) of 6 1/2 years except for the fact he started drinking waaayyyyy waaaayyy toooooo much!!! ...
    kajo kajo 36-40 1 Response Jul 21, 2008

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