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I Choose to Be Faithful In a Sexless Marriage

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 263 People

    But I Come Here To Cope

    and hopefully 'play' a little. I'm still a man, although being in a sexless marriage is certainly a challenge to my manhood. I need to come here to feel alive sometimes.
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jul 24, 2010

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    The Xbox Is Killing My Marriage.

    I threw out all types of hints today.  I was seductive.  I was loving.  He overlooked every advance.  I was furious.  I went up and unplugged the game (yep right in the middle of him playing).   I yelled, I screamed and I banged around a...
    onmyown2009 onmyown2009 36-40, F 9 Responses Oct 20, 2009

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    Nothing Going On.

     I never though it would end up like this, day after day week after week,year after year  not a hand shake, kiss, or even a hug.  My marriage life has come to a complete stand still. As a woman you would think it would not take much to get your man in bed for more than a...
    katnaps katnaps 51-55, F 15 Responses Sep 21, 2011

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    My Goodness, My Faith!

    Yes I do believe that faith is very important. I want goodness in my heart and want to share rare and refined experiences in my life. I hope that my faithfulness is my strength. I've seen so many friends/family live together in sexless marriages but they survived. Sometimes it...
    musicinme musicinme 56-60, F Mar 9, 2013

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    I Love The Title Of This Topic

    "I Choose" Yes, i have chosen to be in a celibate marriage I love my wife very much She has mullerian agnesis - which means she has no vagina or uterus (but yes she has ovaries) She is very warm loving and supportive - and i like hugging and cuddling with her.
    shreem75 shreem75 36-40, M 1 Response Nov 16, 2012

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    Happy At Last!

    When I made my first story here. I was confused about being married to a practically no-libido, very sexually uptight man. Today, I am a happy satisfied woman. I had an epiphany, "Why am I looking to someone else to fulfill me?" I thought about it a long time. My husband is my...
    TrulyWhinehouse TrulyWhinehouse 31-35, F 8 Responses May 30, 2013

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    Find It Harder Every Day

    I am faithful now in a completely sexless marriage. I find that to continue to do that is becoming increasingly difficult. Unfortunately, I have to depend on my wife's income. So, I cannot leave. I really do not want to hurt her by having an affair. So, I am kind of stuck in...
    OutOfPatience OutOfPatience 61-65, M 7 Responses Aug 5, 2011

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    No Sex In This Marriage

    Well, it all just crazy life has drain the sex emotion out of us do to stress, family, work, we feel very lucky to still be togather after all the changes we have been through, now I have fibro diease, that lead to peridonal diease, that was started from depression just going to...
    deannzzee deannzzee 41-45, F 6 Responses Mar 8, 2011

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    Now I No Longer Believe Marriage Is Supposed to Make Me Happy

    I've been frustrated, hurt and confused for a long time, but no more. I think I achieved personal enlightenment. I'm not trying to say I've got it all figured out for you and your situation, but for my part I am 95 percent relaxed, happy, fulfilled and still love and enjoy my...
    realrightnow realrightnow 21-25, F 6 Responses Jul 3, 2008

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    My Story

    I've posted a few other sexless marriage areas on EP.  I like this site.  there are so many that are where I am.  I'm 45 married 21 years to 41 yo wife.  We have 4 teenagers 15-20.My wife finally told me a few years back that she felt sex was a dirty chore, other than that...
    rv02tx rv02tx 46-50, M 5 Responses Sep 26, 2011

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    Tough Times

    So, instead of trying to make myself out to be a man who is frustrated due to lack of intimacy, I have to focus on 'why' it is that there is lack of it. In life, there have been situations that have led me to believe that I was a victim or that I just lost total sense of...
    Mikahel Mikahel 36-40, M 6 Responses Aug 24, 2009

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    I'm new to EP and have been reading a lot of

    different posts. I have to say that there are a lot of people out there living in sexless marriages. I really didn't know where to turn just to vent until I found EP. My wife and I work well together. We understand each other well. We have 2 small children (5 and 3 years old...
    allen8185 allen8185 26-30, M 1 Response May 18

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    I Choose To Be Faithful In A Sexless Marriage

    Similarly my husband has been chronically ill with heart disease & cancer, now in remission and is in no shape to have sex but our relationship still stands and he still shows me in many ways that he loves me, we have been together for 37 years tomorrow and I am his wife as well...
    waynenan29 waynenan29 51-55, F 4 Responses Dec 14, 2010

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    I have read many posts now,

    and I cannot claim to know what is the best route for others. I love my wife and I have amazing young kids, but our problem with sex goes back from long before the kids, and has been there for years. There was a long time where I would approach her and she never would want...
    travelight travelight 41-45, M Apr 20

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    In the Dark

    my husband hasnt touched me for two years he cant give me a reason i know hes not cheating and at first i felt hurt and rejected ect now its becoming normal to go without sex,i have never cheated on him but what is he thinking surely he has to imagine i might eventually if hes...
    hanginout hanginout 46-50 5 Responses Jul 3, 2008

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    I Miss You

    I dream about the closeness that we once shared your smile in the mornings, the smell of your hair; Laying next to me, and holding you tight, to look at your body, what a wonderful sight; Our passion for each other, was once unmatched, till the illness arrived, and our...
    SimplyK SimplyK 56-60, M 9 Responses Mar 18, 2013

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    Not Me

    I just clicked on the not me... My spouse sure isn't being faithful (by rejecting and neglecting me sexually) so she doesn't deserve faithfulness from me. I would be faithful (a one woman man), but she is not interested so what's the point.
    JRSK007 JRSK007 51-55, M 4 Responses Oct 22, 2007

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    Making Love To Myself!

    I married a man that obviously only wanted me to bare his child. He stopped wanting to have sex with me after he got me pregnant. That was almost three years ago. I cried and suffered. I wanted to get married and have a healthy sex life. I wondered why is this happening to me...
    TrulyWhinehouse TrulyWhinehouse 31-35, F 2 Responses Sep 30, 2012

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    Yes, I Choose To Be Faithful, But Shouldn't I Be Choosing Divorce?

    This is the hardest thing I have ever done, staying this this marriage. It's not only lacking sex, it's lacking companionship, spiritual connection, emotional connection - a CONNECTION. He's a good man, really. A nice man. But I'm so lonely.
    Amy100co Amy100co 41-45, F 3 Responses Aug 24, 2012

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    Sexless But Faithful By Choice

    While in a sexless marriage I choose to be faithful.  It is a choice I have to make every day, and sometimes even moments of the day as well.  I choose to be faithful for my children's sake.  How do I teach them to be faithful to their future spouses if I choose to...
    adama adama 36-40, M 20 Responses Jul 19, 2007

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    I chose to be faithful in my marriage.

    I'm beside myself in what to do next because I don't know if I can live like this anymore. In every other aspect our marriage is great. He is a good dad. He helps me around the house without me asking. Occasionally even helps me with laundry. Just that one area is lacking. It...
    hopefull2014 hopefull2014 26-30, F 7 Responses Jun 23

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    Not Married To Her But Has An Eerie Resemblence

    I've been in a very close friendship with this much older lady friend. Once Upon A Time We were in a relationship but at the time She was living her 2nd adolescence. The so called real relationship lasted about 2 yearsish but She stated to Me that She wasn't going to be devoted...
    PitaBeeta76 PitaBeeta76 36-40, M Oct 15, 2013

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    I love my wife and my kids

    but my wife has no interest in having sex with me. She would have sex if I initiated it but when I'm initiating all the time, it almost feels like I'm raping her. I just want her to show me some love once in a while. We don't even cuddle. She doesn't hug me or hold my hand. It's...
    jbeamer123789 jbeamer123789 31-35, M 4 Responses Apr 21

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    Faithful By Choice, Sexless Not By Choice.

    My wife was diagnosed with stage 1 ovarian cancer many years ago. She was successfully treated, and has been given the all clear by the doctors. However, she needed a complete hysterectomy. This allowed her to survive, but it put an end to what was left of our sex life. She has...
    timothywgray timothywgray 41-45, M 17 Responses Sep 22, 2008

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    It's a Tough Decision

     Having sex all alone isn't the ideal that I sought when we got married.  But, I love her and don't want to hurt her by being unfaithful.
    dorobo dorobo 70+, M 4 Responses Dec 26, 2008

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    Faithfully Holding On to Hope

    Married 12 years, together for 19. Intimacy left about 13 years ago, but still very much in love with my wife. I love being around her, we have alot in common. I am now starting to understand the difference between sex and intimacy. I yearn for the emotional feeling of intimacy...
    cash65 cash65 41-45, M 3 Responses Feb 3, 2009

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    Been married for 36 years.

    My wife is an ACOA adult child of alcoholic. Her parents messed her up bad. Did not realize it at first. She was like a faithful loving wife ready to serve my every wish for years. Then the children came and we were bussy. They are grown now and on their own leaving us with...
    in2mec in2mec 56-60, M 2 Responses Dec 5, 2013

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    Missing My Wife

    I am married, love my wife and she rejects me, it has been more than a month since we have been intimate. I am a faithful partner and want help to figure out how to adjust to her lack of desire towards me
    solaytriste solaytriste 41-45 2 Responses Feb 10, 2009

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    Lies Ans Pain.

    My story would take for ever but in brief I have lived in a sexless marriage for 16 months.  My marriage has been plagued with problems but I chose to try and overcome these as I knew my husband loved me and I loved him and we led a good life traveling and enjoying the same...
    moontears moontears 51-55, F 9 Responses Sep 11, 2010

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    Does A Broken Childhood Home Equal A Broken Marriage?

    My wife comes from a broken home (dad who abandoned her forever at age 8 and a mom who is bipolar). Since our son was born 4 years ago, we have had little intimacy and have been married "friends". God brought us together and blessed us with our son(who is our everything...
    GreatHusband37 GreatHusband37 36-40, M 1 Response Apr 16, 2013

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    Another Point Of View

    I got involved in a marriage for all of the wrong reasons and have stayed in it.  I felt pressured by a religious situation to get married and I met someone  with the same religious pressure  who was so desperate to get married that she misrepresented who she was to me.  And...
    blaze3 blaze3 56-60, M 6 Responses Aug 23, 2011

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    Bewildered

    I have been married to a wonderful man for nearly 15 years now.  He is my best friend in the world but it has been months since we have had sex.  He never had what you could call a high libido, but now I'm lucky if we have sex 4 times a year.  My husband is 14...
    Sacul Sacul 36-40, F 6 Responses Apr 15, 2008

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    Struggle

    My husband and I have been married for 11 years.  Shortly after I had our daughter my sex drive dropped from every day (or more) to about once or twice a week.  He didn't appreciate that very much needless to say.  He wasn't mean, or nasty, or vindictive...
    ponii ponii 31-35, F 1 Response Apr 8, 2009

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    Fox In The Hen House

    I'm a little reluctant to write this, but I'm going for it anyway. I feel a bit like I've para-dropped behind enemy lines, and I'm about to be detected. Why? Because I represent the group that chose not to be faithful to a sexless marriage. I think what you are doing (remaining...
    TheWendigo TheWendigo 36-40, M 14 Responses Jun 13, 2011

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    Faithful And Sexless

    After eight years, you'd think I'd be tired of not having sex. You'd think why does this crazy, young, twenty-five year old girl who has her whole life ahead of her stay? Well Let me explain: 1. We had a sexless relationship before we got married( on a calendar, 6 times in one...
    nelliebum nelliebum 26-30, F 8 Responses Aug 15, 2013

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    I Did

    for almost two decades. Now I have chosen to leave.  If I am being totally candid, its not really the lack of sex in itself.  It's all the other things that got me to that point.  For me it was the constant affairs, the lies, the crushing of me into someone I am not.  It took...
    TKD1 TKD1 46-50, F 2 Responses Oct 19, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    Neglect - One of the most important things I've learned from my decision to end my sexless marriage is that I will never again tolerate being neglected by my partner. We all...
    CherishMe2 CherishMe2 51-55, F 11 Responses Aug 30

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    I had to choose a section, so I chose "I Live In a Sexless Marriage." Call it what it is. I denied it. True. If you do live in a sexless marriage, please tell me and if anyone...
    Avek Avek 61-65, F 4 Responses Sep 5

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    I found an interesting study on sexlessness in The Journal of Sexual Medicine. I can't share the full pdf because there's no way to upload it here, but I will copy and paste the...
    RedOctagon RedOctagon 22-25, F 8 Responses Sep 2

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    I'm sure we all have read the story of the guy who emailed his wife a spreadsheet of his failed attempts at sexual advances. I've read more than a few articles on the story...
    chuckdaly chuckdaly 36-40, M 12 Responses Aug 22

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    I have an idea that will solve all of our sexless marriage problems. Let's start a sexless marriage group meeting next door to the sexaholics anonymous meeting. If were lucky it...
    hoss350 hoss350 41-45, M 9 Responses Aug 16

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    Short comings, short sex drive, short of expressing love are all part of Sexless Marriage. Denial and refusal are very familiar. Pay attention to your spouse's messages. My s/m...
    musicinme musicinme 56-60, F 7 Responses Aug 19

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    When I originally posted in April of 2011, I was living in a sexless marriage. I was confused, heartbroken and angry... What happened in the 3 years following has nearly destroyed...
    malms malms 51-55, F 1 Response a week ago

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    I've heard the technical definition of a sexless marriage is sex less than 10 times in a year. But what about quality? What about a partner who doesn't just roll over and tell you...
    frogchop frogchop 46-50, M 14 Responses a week ago

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    I wanted to post and solicit some advice. I have been waiting for my wife to go our of town for a few weeks now. I was/am planning to see a divorce lawyer, one that specializes in...
    hoss350 hoss350 41-45, M 12 Responses 5 days ago

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    I am going to tell how trying to keep my husband in a sexless marriage turned into a terror. When my husband came back from the military his father and other wanted me to assist in...
    isis55 isis55 56-60, F 6 Responses 4 days ago

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    The compromise promise. I ran into a former colleague yesterday. When I worked with him I got to know his wife and kids, and the couple seemed happily married, but got divorced a...
    something2talkabout something2talkabout 51-55, M 8 Responses 2 days ago

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    Bear with me because this may seem off topic, but it isn't. I've been recently thinking about death. Yesterday, my post sexless marriage lover had to put his beloved dog of 14...
    Mettamomma Mettamomma 61-65, F 12 Responses Aug 21

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    So last night my sister and her beau were here spending the night from out of town (had a funeral to go to.) We were chatting, and H says he "uglified" himself to try to get rid of...
    Harley53 Harley53 56-60, F 12 Responses Aug 16

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    Sexless Marriage may have been just the start. I have just about accepted that as long as I’m married there will be no sex. Given some special circumstances, I cannot leave...
    actionjake actionjake 56-60, M 5 Responses Aug 16

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    Oh well my secret is out and as much as I hate to say it I live in a sexless marriage. My story does not quite start like a fairytale as when we met we were both recovering from...
    mysteryjourney mysteryjourney 36-40, M 6 Responses Aug 16

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