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I Cut My Self

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 5,547 People

    Dear whoever is reading this,

    You’re beautiful. I may not know you, but I do know that you were brought into the world for a reason. Nothing can change that. You have strengths people admire you for. Your smile makes other people smile. You’re a unique individual. Smart, talented, kind hearted...
    smilemore123 smilemore123 16-17, F 3 Responses Dec 6, 2013

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    so i'm 89 days clean.

    i wrote this poem thinking it would help me. i wrote it 89 days ago. it's helped me a lot. maybe it can help other people too. stay clean, you don't deserve the hurt, head up <3 just put down that blade, looking down, watching your cuts bleed. tears slowly well up in your...
    18butterfly 18butterfly 16-17, F 5 Responses Feb 10

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    cutting a vein will probably do it .

    .. Idunno... I don't see why I should be here still
    g0ne g0ne 13-15, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    She developed an addiction Nevertheless to a

    prescription Furthermore, she was enticed By an invisible vice That no one could see Or did they just not want it to be? She can’t look at herself anymore Not to say that she could before To open the door, she twist the knob Only to lock it shut just to sob She’s nothing to...
    Anyone5 Anyone5 13-15, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Don't you ever ******* question

    why I cut. I don't have it perfect like you think, my family doesn't give a flying ****. The only time I feel something is when I'm cutting my skin open and watching it bleed. Every time, I hope I don't wake up. Pills don't work, therapy doesn't work. You don't know me. Don't...
    BloodintheWater BloodintheWater 13-15, M 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    So I hadn't cut since march 18th

    but today I cut again. Today is the 2 year anniversary of when my best friend left me and killed herself. It was really hard today. I spent it and still am locked in my room. I cut about 3 hours ago and I felt so much better like I'd forgotten what today was, but memories kept...
    CeBeY1 CeBeY1 16-17, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    My scars are still getting better slowly.

    Little by little worst part is I will wake up every morning and see my pain.
    BlueWings454 BlueWings454 18-21, F 6 Responses 2 days ago

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    Three new razor blades; 8,

    400mg of Ibuoprofen; 160mg of Prozac; and 1,500mg of Zoloft. I haven't even cut for six days. What do you think? Do nothing, overdose, slice both my arms up, or both? I have a feeling this week is not going to be good.
    BloodintheWater BloodintheWater 13-15, M 4 Responses 4 days ago

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    I actually talked myself out of cutting.

    That's a first. One time I didn't need someone to talk me out of it. Maybe there is some hope.
    ItsDawnHeree ItsDawnHeree 13-15, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    People don't take cutters seriously.

    If they knew someone who cuts they would say that we are attention seekers or we're creepy or just in a growing up stage where teenagers are just confused. Like really?? If we want attention, we wouldn't hide when we cut, or if this is like some part of growing up we wouldn't be...
    vhientie vhientie 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 7

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    My mother brought over some toiletries

    for my apartment, which included a box of Venus disposable shavers. I broke one apart as soon as she left. I don't know what it is about new blades that give me the best release, maybe because I was so use to my dull, old ones that barely even cut deep enough anymore. I just...
    FarrahRelates FarrahRelates 18-21, F 3 Responses 3 days ago

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    Too Deep.

    Dear friend, I cut too deep. I hit the vein and I went numb. I didn't cry out, or let a tear fall, i sat there. I let the blood fall down my arm and closed my eyes. It stopped after a while. I stitched it up and went to find my mother. I had my wrist bandaged, but she wasn't...
    misfit17 misfit17 18-21, F 5 Responses Mar 4, 2013

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    I cut today for the first time in forever.

    It actually REALLY HURY, as supposed to before when I used to cut often. I did three small ones and they stung so bad. I honestly don't remember it ever hurting so bad like that before. Isn't that weird?
    PanicAtTheDiscount PanicAtTheDiscount 13-15, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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     I just sit here

    for hours, with my blade in hand and favorite song blasting, just second guessing my entire existence. I don't even cry anymore, I just hear these voices telling me over and over again how much of a mistake I am. I can't seem to shake this feeling of anguish, this constant...
    FarrahRelates FarrahRelates 18-21, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    Life.

    So this is my first story. Sorry if it is kind of bad but whatevs. It is what it is. Life sucks. I have been getting worse for a while. Let me start from the very beginning. In 3rd grade my grandpa died. I was super close to him. In 4th grade, my niece died. Her heart didn...
    Katier32 Katier32 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 21, 2013

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    I cut again, then realized the cuts were my

    only friend What am I doing to myself? So many days clean. Thrown away.
    thoughtfulstars thoughtfulstars 13-15, F 5 Responses Apr 4

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    Those six days clean?

    They're gone. I keep hoping I catch one of the arteries in my forearm, and I never do. So it's an endless bullshit cycle of sinking lower and lower, more than I ever thought possible. What's the ******* point? I try and stop cutting, and it just gets worse when I relapse...
    BloodintheWater BloodintheWater 13-15, M 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    I hate using dull blades

    because you have to like really cut deep to feel something and the blades don't really feel as good as new ones. So whenever my parents get new blades I make sure to break one open. New blades just feel way better than dull ones
    ItsDawnHeree ItsDawnHeree 13-15, F 4 Responses 3 days ago

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    So I haven't cut in maybe 2 weeks,

    and it's my moms wedding in 2 days so I was going to wait till after if I wanted to do it again, but bad things are happening which make me feel like I can't cope, This guy and me are really close friends and we had sex for the first time since I got raped, he's a lovely guy...
    SecretGirl14 SecretGirl14 16-17, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    Clean

    I've been clean well over two months now but most things set me off wanting to cut again but I haven't so, woohoo I guess.
    deleted deleted 26-30 9 Responses Jul 21, 2013

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    Scars

    When I see the scars on my body I think, "What have I done?". I think of I have to always wear bracelets. Or that people will judge me if they see. Will anyone love me? I'm so broken. 3 months clean, but I'm scared of triggers.
    5minuetsofsummer 5minuetsofsummer 16-17 18 Responses Oct 13, 2013

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    So obviously I cut. Or I have.

    I started. I haven't really had anything traumatic happen to me.. I'm just always angry at something. I don't officially have depression or anything, but sometimes I'm 90% sure I have anxiety. I don't know why I started, and I feel like it's not normal. Ik most people who do...
    heyguysss heyguysss 13-15, F 2 Responses 58 mins ago

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    The Butterfly Project.

    The Rules are: 1. When you feel like you want to cut, take a marker, pen, or sharpies and draw a butterfly on your arm or hand. 2. Name the butterfly after a loved one, or someone that really wants you to get better. 3. You must let the butterfly fade naturally. NO scrubbing it...
    somethingbecomingnothing somethingbecomingnothing 18-21, F 20 Responses Dec 15, 2011

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    Have to go talk to my parents today.

    They already know but I told them I wasn't ready to talk. Now I have to go and explain myself but honestly how do you explain it? How do you get anyone to understand harming yourself? I know they will ask why but I have no one reason why and I don't want to get into that.
    anon1995 anon1995 18-21, F 8 Responses 1 day ago

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    Are You An Angel?

    Little Boy: Are you an angel? Me: What? Little Boy: My mum told me that those who have marked wrists are angels. Me: I'm not an angel Little Boy: Of course you are. Mum said that only angels harm themselves because they don't like life on Earth. This world is destroying them...
    BlurredBeyondTheStarsx BlurredBeyondTheStarsx 13-15 3 Responses Nov 3, 2013

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    Count To 10

    Shut your eyes tight, Tell yourself it's all alright. Clench your fists in till they feel as if they could burst, You remember the time you had to do this first. You're eyes soon reach their fill, Soon after you're tears begin to spill. Brace yourself for what's yet to come...
    bigeyesseemore bigeyesseemore 13-15, F 4 Responses Dec 1, 2012

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    <3

    She paints a pretty picture but this picture has a twist you see.. her paintbrush is a razor ... and her canvas is her wrist she paints her pretty picture in a color thats blood red while using her sharp painbrush she ends up finally dead her pretty pictures fading quite...
    PinkiieeBabyy PinkiieeBabyy 18-21 5 Responses Oct 3, 2011

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    I'm going to try again on 04/20/14 at 0100.

    Take a bunch of ibuprofen earlier to dull the pain, and make one, deep cut, on both arms, while pressing in obviously. It's strange how much this simple plan calms me. I just hope my resolve holds. And to all of life's trolls, ********, bullies, etc.: **** YOU.
    BloodintheWater BloodintheWater 13-15, M 5 hrs ago

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    <3

    She’s emo? You’d cut too, if you’ve been through what she has. She’s anorexic? You’d be too, if everyone called you fat everyday. She’s a *****? She made one mistake that cost her, her reputation. She’s a showoff? Her parents abused her, & she’s never heard of...
    PinkiieeBabyy PinkiieeBabyy 18-21 13 Responses Oct 7, 2011

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    I am sick of cutting myself.

    Will not fall back into my ways. Besides the fact that these scars are hideous and that cuts are painful, I'm tired of being weak. if i keep doing so i will never be able to love myself wholly. it breaks my heart every time i cut. 4 days clean and i will keep going. i will not...
    TealMarie TealMarie 16-17, F 4 Responses 4 days ago

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    Dear whoever is reading this- I love you.

    I don't know who you are or what struggles you have, but you are human. You have a soul, you have a conscience, you have feelings and I love you. I think you are beautiful inside and out, I think you are good enough, I believe in you even it you think no one else does.
    mattihope mattihope 18-21, F 3 Responses Jan 21

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    Survey

     Self Harm Survey1 How old were you when you started self-harming?Younger than 44-56-78-910-1112-1314-1515-1616-1718-1920-21Older than 212 How often do you self-harmMore than once a dayOnce a daySeveral times a weekOnce a weekTwo or more times a monthOnce a monthSeveral...
    FibreglassWings FibreglassWings 22-25, F 10 Responses Dec 10, 2012

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    Tonight's going to be another round of "Let's

    See How Many Cuts I Can Make, and How Deep They'll Be". Life is bullshit anyway.
    BloodintheWater BloodintheWater 13-15, M 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Away From Youre Self

    I cut my self.... Its like a drug.. it gets you to a place of peace.. a place where you don't think about you're problems.. a place where you think of the future.. a fealing of numness.... a fealing of no fealing.... but most of all it gets you away from youre self....
    yme73 yme73 16-17, M 24 Responses Apr 28, 2009

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    The tears stream down my face.

    My thoughts are racing. All the words people say to me are rushing back. I've been clean for a few weeks. I can't do this. I've been so strong lately. I hold the blades from my disposable razor in my hands. One cut. That's it I think to myself. No more! Two cuts. Stop! Three...
    sarah81199 sarah81199 13-15, F 4 Responses Dec 29, 2013

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    Handle With Care

    "People always want to know what it feels like, so I’ll tell you: there’s a sting when you first slice, and then your heart speeds up when you see the blood, because you know you’ve done something you shouldn’t have, and yet you’ve gotten away with it. Then you sort of...
    somethingbecomingnothing somethingbecomingnothing 18-21, F 8 Responses Feb 13, 2012

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    There is 6 pints of blood in the human body,

    loose 1 your fine your body don't suffer at all, loose 2 your body goes Into shock, loose 3 you die, you're not going to loose 3 pints of blood from a cut on you're arm that is a little deep and hasn't penetrated any major veins or arteries, so don't worry about me or get scared...
    DearIniquity DearIniquity 13-15, M 6 Responses Mar 3

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    Oh my god. ****. I hate myself.

    I'm so annoying. I'm expendable to all my friends. In my darkest hour everyone leaves me. The razor offered sanctity, if only for a few seconds. But I dragged the time out, going deeper, turning the single cut into a gaping hole until I'd been working on the cut for half an hour...
    left4deadspace left4deadspace 16-17, M 2 Responses Dec 16, 2013

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    DearIniquity DearIniquity 13-15, M 6 Responses Feb 26

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    basically I've had these scars

    for about a month and IM EXTREMELY SCARED BECAUSE THEY ARENT GOING AWAY... there's only about 3 people who know (2 friends and my brother) and I can't tell my parents or other friends because no one understands... I have no idea what to do. they are pinkish and puffy. will it...
    miamiamiamiamiamia miamiamiamiamiamia 13-15, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    Her body was a canvas

    and her blades were her paintbrushes
    justakookiegirl justakookiegirl 16-17, F 6 Responses Feb 27

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    I cut 2 days ago 48 hours It's still gaping

    open It's still leaking blood I'm scared
    just1a2girl3 just1a2girl3 18-21, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    Amidala97 Amidala97 16-17, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    BloodintheWater BloodintheWater 13-15, M 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    Rip Isabelle

    Drip. Drip.The water is clear.And now it’s red.She’s all alone.Now she’s dead.Drip. Drip.Covered in blood.There’s no skin left.See her bones?Look, she’s dead.Drip. Drip.She starved herself.She always bled.She’s beautiful.But she’s dead.Drip. Drip.She’s so young.So...
    somethingbecomingnothing somethingbecomingnothing 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 13, 2012

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    I had flashbacks last night.

    I wanted to cut and get them done and out of my mind. But just then my friend texted me and helped me through. He skyped with me and made sure I was okay :) I'm so glad to have a friend like him in my life...I just wish my boyfriend was this caring : I didn't cut and I slept...
    jackjack600 jackjack600 18-21, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    Hush little baby, Don't you cry,

    Don't cut your arms, Don't say goodbye, Put down that razor, Put down that knife, It may be hard, But you'll win this fight. ❤
    Brookeatron Brookeatron 16-17, F 9 Responses Dec 12, 2013

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    I feel like cutting again.

    ... I feel like **** because I messed things up again& I know i cant fix it. ... this is all my fault ...
    g0ne g0ne 13-15, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    I knew a boy who liked to draw,

    He drew pictures that nobody saw, He was most artistic late at night, In the bathroom out of sight, He kept a secret no one knew. His drawings were different, no paper or pen, But needed a bandage now and again. We stood by the river under the stars, He rolled up his...
    Pettifogger Pettifogger 16-17, M 5 Responses Mar 4

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    I just feel empty. I don't know how to explain

    this overwhelming anguish other then pure emptiness. I'm done fighting, I will let it in just so it can be over. Falling back to the blade.
    FarrahRelates FarrahRelates 18-21, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    Why do I cut? I cut because it provides a

    control over my pain. It hurts but I find a center point In that pain. I breathe it in and it feels good. The red seeps out and the more I see the more satisfied I feel. For a moment in time I feel in control. In those moments I am saying **** you all for the hurt you have...
    searchingfar searchingfar 22-25, F 2 days ago

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    I Hate Myself.

    I really just want to tell everyone about my most recent suicide attempt. I locked my bedroom door I'm fear someone may see me. I walk to mybed and look at the items in front of me. A bottle of Nyquil, ibuprofen from my last visit to the hospital and my razor blade. I grabbed...
    sarah81199 sarah81199 13-15, F 5 Responses Nov 6, 2013

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    Well yesterday I broke.

    I was 26 days clean. These two girls at school started calling me fat, ugly, and laughing about my scars. I held it in for six hours until I got home. When I got home I broke I cut again. They say I do it for attention, but I do it as an escape.
    TealMarie TealMarie 16-17, F 21 Responses Dec 4, 2013

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    Normal? What Is That?

    Sometimes when I'm not constantly insulting myself, I think...what's it like being normal? What's it like to look in the mirror and not hate what's looking back? What's it like to have a lot of friends and a boyfriend and just a good social life? What's it like not to be hated...
    BlurredBeyondTheStarsx BlurredBeyondTheStarsx 13-15 1 Response Nov 11, 2013

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    "Then she closed her eyes.

    .. She found relief in a knife. The blood flows as she cries." - The Way She Feels, Between The Trees ❤️
    ItsDawnHeree ItsDawnHeree 13-15, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I have scars all over my legs

    and arms, i hate them and love them. Selfharm is an addiction and we can never escape it. I think it's been 4 month's since i did it last, i always have that thought of my blades in my mind, some nights it's god damn hard to keep myself away from it. I love it, it's a part of me...
    Soldottern Soldottern 16-17, F 4 days ago

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    Today, I'm going to share my story with you.

    :) Almost two years ago I fell into serious depression. I was crying myself to sleep every other night and I believed that no one cared for me. Not too many people know what it feels like when not a single soul gives a damn about you. Doesn't feel very good ... I had extremely...
    tamnialler tamnialler 13-15, F 10 Responses Mar 3

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