I Cut Off Ties With My Biological Family

For people who have freed themselves from a dysfunctional family and are trying to lead a "normal" life 290 People

    Taking Control Of My Happiness And Ditching Toxic Family

    I am finally free to live my life and be the person who I want to be. It has been a painful and heartbreaking process but I choose happiness over my 'pretend family' I am the classic scapegoat.  I have had to put up with physical, mental and emotional abuse my whole life...
    lifebeginsat33 lifebeginsat33
    31-35, F
    91 Responses Feb 6, 2010

    Now you'll have to bear with me

    as my memory from my younger life isn't very clear. Anyway my story starts with my first memory of my mother when I was around 3 or 4, I was swung around the room by my hair with my face hit against the wall. I can't remember what I'd done to deserve this but I know now that no...
    fakinghappyy fakinghappyy
    26-30, F
    1 Response May 23, 2014

    I'm not very good at defending myself

    and I actually handled my departure badly with nasty texts and arguments. Without going into too much detail, my mother was untrustworthy and took her spite out on me over my father whilst practically idolising my sister who she clearly felt was more of a reflection of her...
    Notbadmanchester Notbadmanchester
    41-45, F
    1 Response Aug 3, 2014

    Some Memories Still Hurt And Always Will

    I was reading some posts recently,one mentioned losing a diamond while looking for pebbles,another post mentioned"Desiderata" the beautiful introspective and anonymous poem which talks about "foolish devotions" and this brought back memories of my father to me,sad memories,I was...
    berangere berangere
    66-70, F
    3 Responses May 21, 2013

    hey there fellow unfamilia folks!

    I have a qu. Do you find yourself to be alone in being family-less and although maybe have friends who feel bad for you...but still can't relate/understand? Would you value having a real life peer group of others also sans family where you can inter-relate, develop more inner...
    islandadrift islandadrift
    36-40, F
    1 Response Sep 3, 2015

    They Were Never There

    Early last year I realized it bothered me way more than I'd ever let it. I cut contact with my father over 20 years ago (well, he did that when he threatened to kill me and my mother). I cut contact with my mother several years ago, except for some semi-annual phonecalls on...
    Wonderatrix Wonderatrix
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Jan 12, 2012

    Had Enuff And It Feels Good To Stand Up

    My whole life Ive been abused in all sorts of ways by my bio family. My bio mom told me she should have killed me @ birth I knew I wasnt wanted from a very young age. She even threatened to kill me when I was pregnant with her first grandchild to a point her boyfriend who I...
    bilow72 bilow72
    41-45, F
    1 Response Jan 28, 2010

    Toxic Siblings

    It has been some time now since I cut off ties with the majority of my family. All though it can be sad and painful for me at times, I now understand that they did not bring much happiness into my life. The sadness I feel is from the realisation that I never actually had a...
    lifebeginsat33 lifebeginsat33
    31-35, F
    6 Responses Aug 21, 2012

    Forgiving does not mean

    that I have to be a part of a family that is toxic to my well being. I forgive my mother for the things she did and continues to do, because I understand that she does not understand her world to be dysfunctional. As a child and teen she was verbally abusive. Everything she...
    RhombusInTheSquare RhombusInTheSquare
    41-45, F
    3 Responses Feb 24, 2015

    The Spoils Of The Day

    When an elderly aunt of my brother's wife died of old age,she and my brother were eager to get to her house quickly so they could have the best pick of the spoils,they never visited her once in the past and cared even less about her welfare,but they were prepared to make the long...
    berangere berangere
    66-70, F
    3 Responses Feb 4, 2013

    It took me over twenty years to do it

    but finally I did and I'm sitting in the silence knowing that there's nothing between myself and the life I want. Without the excuse of having to take care of them I have to start building my own life
    honestlyanonymouslyme honestlyanonymouslyme
    26-30, F
    1 Response Jul 12, 2015

    I refer to them as Satan

    and the Spawn of Satan and Satan's minions.
    deleted deleted
    Jan 6, 2016
    Wednesday58910 Wednesday58910
    36-40, F
    1 Response Jul 20, 2015

    Free From Guilt

    Hi, my name is Ruby. Over 10 years ago I packed up my bags and physically left my parents. I moved to another country, studied and met my other half. 10 years later and he is still everything that I ever wanted. I completed a degree and now have two wonderful children. My husband...
    rubyelington rubyelington
    31-35, F
    5 Responses Nov 27, 2010

    Biological Ties

    Yesterday, a customer came in with a very old wetsuit, one that my family made at least twenty years ago, and it needs repair. It's been a long time since he even realized that my grandparents had retired, and the business is now mine. He asked about my folks, and unfortunately...
    silentwriter180 silentwriter180
    46-50, F
    1 Response Mar 5, 2012

    In The Process, But Unsure?

    I have been debating for a while about whether or not I should officially, 100% cut off ties with my family. I am currently in college, and am in the low-contact phase, and enjoying every minute of it! Unfortunately I still need to spend breaks at my parents' house and deal...
    Phoenix713 Phoenix713
    1 Response Apr 16, 2013

    In The Process Of Wanting To Cut Off

    First up I'm probably younger than most of the people here and I hope no one comments and says that Its the teenager hormones . I've been having a very bad relationship w my parents and mind you I come from an Asian family so it's worse than some . My mum constantly yells at me...
    Junkfoodts Junkfoodts
    3 Responses Nov 23, 2011

    I am the truth teller in my family.

    I was the one who ruined my mother's life because she got pregnant with me out of wedlock in the 1950's as she was on her way to work on her doctorate in of all things, psychology. She never let me forget it. She would tell me that if abortion would have been legal she would...
    beth4405 beth4405
    56-60, F
    3 Responses Jan 19, 2015

    I have suffered with poor mental health

    for many years following my divorce. I always felt not good enough in my marriage. I could never understand why I felt I always had to be grateful for any small bit of attention. I never felt I had anything of value to say in a conversation and when my husband began a gambling...
    StandingDown StandingDown
    51-55, F
    2 Responses Mar 21, 2014

    I Disowned Them All

    I disowned my Dad's side of the family in 2007. It was after finding out my Dad failed his responsibility as a parent to my sister. My sister's home was getting destroyed by Hurricane Rita. She had two small girls in tow and a husband who didn't care about his family. My dad...
    noaht43 noaht43
    46-50, T
    1 Response Nov 11, 2013

    Life Has Never Been Sweeter

    I have just realised that it has been nearly 4 years since writing my first story about cutting off ties with my biological family. I wrote the story as at the time I could not find much information about this topic as I think it is not generally accepted as something people...
    lifebeginsat33 lifebeginsat33
    31-35, F
    5 Responses Nov 29, 2013

    It's Never Too Late To Chose Your Self

    I just read the story about cutting off ties with your biological family and mine is similar. I cannot remember many happy times when I was younger and this is the first time I have ever told my story: My father believed in corporal punishment for everything from minor to major...
    jfromcincy jfromcincy
    41-45, F
    1 Response Aug 16, 2013

    Had To Let Them Go

    I dont need to spill all the details all over the internet. Lets just say I no longer send money, clothes, food, pay bills, or worry if they are eating, safe, clean, warm or dry. I cannot carry their loads anymore, and I refuse to allow myself to be beaten by their in...
    Dejibo Dejibo
    51-55, F
    2 Responses Apr 21, 2013

    Fresh Start

    Haha so it figures I would be the only one in this group. Oh well on with the story. For years I have dealt with a range of abuse by my family. I have never fit in and no matter what I've done it's never been good enough. At my age you would think that my family couldn't...
    college101 college101
    31-35, F
    14 Responses Dec 21, 2009

    Sad, But Peaceful For The Decision To Cut Ties.

    Oh where can I even begin? I'm glad to have found this site, because I have to admit I feel quite alone sometimes with my decision, although deep down I feel at peace. I have tried to remove myself from my family picture for as long as I can remember, from when I was very...
    bluegreenoasis bluegreenoasis
    2 Responses Oct 18, 2012

    Have Your Siesta,Grand'Pa!

    It was on Sunday,I asked my father if he would give me a lift to the next town ten kms away,so that I could meet with friends from work who had invited me to a movie,even before he could reply,my brother's wife had put her two Bobs's worth!"Oh! grand'pa you worked hard all...
    berangere berangere
    66-70, F
    7 Responses Feb 11, 2013

    On My Own

    My name is Jalee, I have a very large family divorced and parents remarried and had children of their own. I have a long story to tell that I don't want to go into detail about, but just need to vent. All I can say is that I have made a few mistakes in life and my family will not...
    Jlee728 Jlee728
    36-40, F
    Jul 20, 2013

    since I can remember my biological father

    hasn't been in my life,saw him for the first time in 10 years at his mother's funeral,he starting emailing me and I let my guard down and started to let him back into my life,only to be rejected a week later with an email stating.he didn't think he could have a relationship with...
    Jan 4, 2016

    I Am No Different

    My story is the same as yours, grew up in dysfunction, behaved dysfunctionally during my young adult life, and then got healthy. These stories I have read are heart-wrenching and if I had the capacity to hug each and everyone of you....I would. So we have all made the attempts...
    jencourage76 jencourage76
    41-45, F
    5 Responses Jun 21, 2012

    My parents were bad people.

    I left because I wanted to live a better life and be a better person than I could ever have been living in their shadow.
    SilverSearching SilverSearching
    31-35, M
    1 Response Dec 11, 2014

    Making Our Own Family Connections

    I never had much of a family or was stable enough when I was younger to maintain healthy relationships however over time I have been part of Hugssociety and learned not only how to maintain and keep friendships alive but make a family that I could support and who I could accept...
    Hugsdirector Hugsdirector
    36-40, F
    Nov 4, 2013

    I have an update to my experience with making

    steps to make a break from my destructive bio family. I won't go into too much detail, but I have a brother who was always a problem child. He hit me a lot when we were kids. He basically terrorized his siblings when my parents were away. Anyway, he is 50 and continues to...
    orangey1 orangey1
    3 Responses Dec 20, 2015

    Did any of you guys have a moment of clarity

    or an epiphany of sorts, when you decided it was time to cut ties?Like truly cut ties with your family...I did...I was standing in my with my uncle in the middle of the street, back home...(foreigner) after traveling there, due to my mom being very sick...I was raised by my...
    Yesitzme Yesitzme
    31-35, F
    1 Response Oct 12, 2015

    I have AIDS and they were making me sicker.

    I left to, literally, save my life.
    stphnmclrn46 stphnmclrn46
    1 Response Nov 11, 2014

    Looking For Others Like Me That Continuously Do Internal Work

    Single black female here, never married with no kids. Professional and fairly conservative, healthy for the most part. I live in Dallas, TX but am open to friends that can relate to me anywhere. I lead a fairly normal life outside of my boughts of lonliness. My family is...
    happytobefreee happytobefreee
    3 Responses Mar 7, 2012

    The Moment Has Finally Arrived....

    I have been wanting to cut all ties with my toxic mother and her perverted husband. They both are beyond "dysfunctional" and the only reason I managed to hang on to the relationship last time (when I told my mom I was moving on) was because she lured me in with money to go back...
    extraordinaryperception extraordinaryperception
    3 Responses Oct 23, 2012

    Just Now Going Through The Process, I Realize I Have Put It Off For Too Long...

    From 1 to 5 I was a fairly normal child, with a fairly normal life.  My parents weren't rich, they fought a lot, but my father was always nurturing and playful, my mother always worked and didn't pay me and my siblings much attention.  At around 5 my father lost his job and...
    faesy faesy
    5 Responses Apr 11, 2011

    It's been 8 months since I've officially

    decided to cut off all ties with my father, and his wife. Things have been quiet for the most part. I did run into an old friend while grocery shopping and he informed me that my biological brother was telling him that I'm just sitting around waiting for Dad to die.. LOL this...
    mudflap73 mudflap73
    41-45, F
    2 Responses Jun 5, 2015

    The Teaching Of Good Manners

    I guess some people need to be taught good manners,as young teenager I was such a one! I always forget to knock when I visited my brother's home and had to be reminded that YOU DO NOT enter PEOPLE's home without knocking! I tended to forget perhaps because little Johnny and...
    berangere berangere
    66-70, F
    Feb 11, 2013

    It's All Still Very New

    I'm honestly not sure what to say.  I'm very tired is really about it. In the last few years I feel very abused and betrayed by my family.  Since all of this hurt has come up, I've tried to defend my family saying that they weren't like this before.  But...
    happyhonu happyhonu
    31-35, F
    8 Responses May 10, 2010

    They Were, Literally, Making Me Sick

    My mom runs into my room and screams at me. My dad cusses and lies. My brother beats me up when he's angry. They're not bad people all the time, but they don't realize how hurtful their behavior is. I've left the house many, many times, only to have to come back because I ran...
    stphnmclrn46 stphnmclrn46
    1 Response Dec 5, 2012

    right im on breaking point of turnig round

    and thumping a family member. i am made to feel angry all the time i am made to feel like im treading on egg shells every second of the day everyday. i am considering in changig my name by law when i cam get out of this country. any way of doing this?
    leavemebe234 leavemebe234
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Oct 30, 2015

    I cut off ties with my physically

    and verbally abusive nuclear family. It has since been a relief to be somewhere in which I have no connection or ties to them. However I still occasionally feel guilty and remorseful for not being able to contact aunt and uncles whom never knew the overt abuse that I suffered...
    metalman27 metalman27
    26-30, M
    1 Response Jul 9, 2014

    Dysfunctional Family Who Stole From Me & Fabricated Lies

    I am alone! My family and "friends" have bullied me for most of my life. I spend holidays and birthdays alone because I am unable to hear any more unsolicited criticism from family and friends. Many of my "friends" have used me to advance in college and in their careers. They ALL...
    BulliedAndBeaten BulliedAndBeaten
    36-40, F
    5 Responses Nov 13, 2012

    I'd just 'Cut Off Ties With my Biological

    Family Let TRUE God hear me, cut the failure chain and set me FREE I am mature enough now. I know this might sound silly My mom keeps trying to control my life with my Daddy’s money And no matter what I say, or do, She thinks that she knows me better than me. I don't wanna...
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Jan 6, 2014

    My Family Are My Children

    I cut my family out of my life. My father passed away when I was young and due to some problems, I haven't spoken to my mother in over three years. My relationship with my sister and nieces/nephews are just non-existent. Everyone always wants something (money) and never give...
    jinx1965 jinx1965
    4 Responses Nov 27, 2011
    leavemebe234 leavemebe234
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Sep 4, 2015

    I don't speak to most of my family.

    I am one of 7 children. Every single one of my siblings have been scarred by my dysfunctional parents and it's bizarre that they know our parents ****** up but still participate in the family scuffles. I can't live like this. One by one (with the exclusion of one stronger...
    silvercoatedbrass silvercoatedbrass
    31-35, F
    1 Response Jul 1, 2015
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