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I Dislike Being Told to Calm Down

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,321 People

    I Hate Being Told To "calm Down!"

    Because the jerk that's telling me to "calm down" is either quashing my excitement or not hearing what I'm saying.  And if he's not hearing me if I'm yelling to be heard over his mouth, how's he going to hear mine if I stop talking...?     
    Deadened Deadened 51-55, F Aug 16, 2011

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    Why Not?

    Why not? It's just one way of pacifying me. And I am not a kid anymore. I know how to act appropriately in different situations. So if I act "violently", surely that would be for some valid reasons. And nobody has the right to shut me up.
    wildice wildice 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 18, 2010

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    Please Dont

    Telling me to calm down when I am upset is one of the most frustrating things for me because I am a rather passionate person and what I feel I feel strongly. Telling me to calm down when I'm angry only makes me more infuriated because what *I* hear is "what your angry about isn...
    MountainGhost MountainGhost 31-35, F 2 Responses Jun 25, 2011

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    I Actually Hate It,

    because I'm never calm, I'm nervous all the time! ( the picture says it all ) 
    watermellonsmile watermellonsmile 16-17, F Jan 15, 2012

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    No I Won't Calm Down!

    Telling me to calm down when I'm upset only upset me even more. If they could just let me calm down by myself, I'll be fine. But when I'm angry with someone or having a fight with someone and another person suddenly tell me to calm down, I'll get angry at him/her as well...
    amethyst91 amethyst91 18-21, F 3 Responses Sep 21, 2010

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    Opposite Effect

    Telling me to calm down when I'm upset tends to have the exact opposite effect.  I'll just get more wound up.
    Plaid Plaid 31-35, F 1 Response Sep 28, 2011

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    Annoying

    If I'm pissed off and somebody tells me to calm down that just ****** me off even more.
    CreedenceGold CreedenceGold 18-21, M 1 Response Jun 2, 2011

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    Stfu!

    I HATE being told to calm down. Unless you're feeling what i feel i don't want to hear it. I feel like slapping anyone who says that because they do not understand whats going on in my head and the panic i'm feeling. My mom tells me that a lot when i get upset.
    enemyinthemirror enemyinthemirror 18-21, F 2 Responses Aug 25, 2011

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    Only Because...

    I don't like being told what to do basically. That's all due to stubborness and always feel the need to have the last word in.
    AmethystWings AmethystWings 26-30, F 1 Response Dec 8, 2011

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    Oh Well, Now That You Told Me To I Guess I Will Stop Being Upset

    I have always been told I am "hypersensative" but Iguess that means I don't appreciate getting made fun of in a mean spirited way, I cry when I am angry, and I cry when I am sad, and I cry during emotional movies. I have anxiety, so yeah, I am an emotional person. But do...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Sep 14, 2012

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    Patronised

    Man I hate being patronised.But I do believe some are not trying to...but It always feels that way.If Im flipping out...Its best if you either help me sort it out (find my keys DAMMIT)Or just walk away....If you walk away...eventually I will calm down and feel like a **** but if...
    MushroomFaerie148 MushroomFaerie148 22-25, F 2 Responses Mar 27, 2011

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    Seriously...Don't.

    It's so maddening when you're upset and you hear some idiots say "Just calm down." No! Just because your royal *** dictates for me to calm down, doesn't mean It's going to work! Just go be cheerful elsewhere and let me fester in my anger, because even that seems more pleasant...
    imalittleteapot39 imalittleteapot39 18-21, F Dec 1, 2013

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    Trigger Words And Phrases

    I have a number of trigger words and phrases that can set me into a full-fledged fit of rage. "Calm down" is one of them. Don't tell me to calm down! I'm obviously seriously upset about something, and for me to make that known is rare. So if I'm hysterical, ranting, crying...
    SarahTM SarahTM 26-30, F Nov 17, 2010

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    I Hate Being Told How to Feel Period.

    I have a right to my feelings and if someone is telling me to calm down I assume it is their discomfort and therefore their problem. I feel more angry when told to calm down. Who gave anyone such power over me?! I was told my whole life growing up exactly how to feel and how not...
    candy100 candy100 56-60, F 3 Responses May 13, 2009

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    The Worst Thing You Can Possibly Say To Me

    It's probably the worst thing you can say to me when I'm angry it just annoys me even more.
    ForeverAutumn80 ForeverAutumn80 18-21, F Sep 3, 2013

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    Calm Down?

    Simply tell me to calm down? I get mad at whoever told me to calm down.Don't tell me to take 10 deep breaths, or i'll attack.I need to go to a peaceful place to relax (considering I can even find one in the chaotic town I live in).I hate people that tell you to calm down, do your...
    Anonymous6182 Anonymous6182 13-15 Aug 4, 2012

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    Im Told That I Get Angry All The Time

    I get worked up sometimes, and turn red. I cant help it. I will fill with rage and just verbally attack anyone around me. It would be funny if it was a movie. But it is actually my life.
    Dan0000 Dan0000 26-30, M Sep 17, 2012

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    Calm Is Good

    On 90% of the occasions I have been told to calm down, I was actually very calm. And very right. It is merely a ploy used by control freaks,  to get you to shut up. They are trying to ruffle your feathers. Remain calm, they hate that!
    Lilt Lilt 46-50 27 Responses Jan 29, 2009

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    I Hate When Someone Tells Me To Calm Down In A Bitchy Tone

    I really cant stand bitchy people that pretend they want to have a non-drama situation, but they really wanna just aggravate you so that they can tell you to calm down and they can feel like they accomplished messing with your head. I hate people that just are asking for you to...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Feb 21, 2011

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    Annoying is right!! My boss does this often to

    me and anyone around her. I want to rip her to shreds when she does that. Lol.
    Berryqueen Berryqueen 41-45, F 3 Responses Feb 21

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    If There Was Any Chance I Was Going To Calm Down...

    you just killed it when you said "Calm Down"! ARG, IT MAKES ME SO ANGRY! But if you do see me calm when I should be angry, you better run as far as you can, because I'm calmly planning something very evil.
    redpanda redpanda 18-21, M 1 Response Oct 11, 2010

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    I Hate Being Told Calm Down

    I happy most days and I dont lose my temper very easy.  But the last time I got really upset I did so becalse i didnt feel i was being hurd , i was asked for the3d time to move in with his mother i didnt feel it would work out i got so mad i could barely speak  ...
    lunnas lunnas 41-45, F 4 Responses Sep 1, 2009

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    I Get This A Lot

    People often tell me to "chill out" but I am a ball of energy and have the need to express how I feel, when I feel it. And if I am not bouncing from wall to wall, I am keeping all my emotions locked up too tight. I guess neither extreme is good...
    CrazyHippieChick CrazyHippieChick 18-21, F 2 Responses Aug 11, 2010

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    I Really Hate Being Told to 'calm Down'

     I am a passionate person. So I also have a bit of a temper. And every time something or someone gets on my nerves and I say something about it (not even angry); my friends keep repeating to me 'relaaaaax'.  God that makes me want to punch them in the face sometimes...
    LadyTink LadyTink 22-25, F 3 Responses Sep 3, 2009

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    I'm A Banshee

    I hate being told to calm down because I like to throw tantrums. They're a healthy outlet for me. Instead of bottling up my feelings, I like to say what's on my mind and have a good old fashioned panic attack. Cleansing.
    GrabYourPardnerDoeSeeDoe GrabYourPardnerDoeSeeDoe 26-30, F Jan 15, 2012

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    Be Cool

    I hate when Im trying to express myself fully, when Im letting every thought thats bothering me leave my lips and someone says, Calm Down. It sets me off so fast and makes me explode. You dont tell me to calm down, I will calm down when I am ready too. It ****** me off so...
    abstractjunkie abstractjunkie 22-25, F Jan 29, 2010

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    How You Make Me Really Mad

    Yes, if you really wanna see the sh*t hit the fan, tell me to calm down. I do have a temper, and when I am losing it, for everyones safety, don't tell me to calm down or tell me I am acting crazy.
    wonderstruck77 wonderstruck77 31-35, F Feb 24, 2013

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    I Have a Range of Emotions.

    Who says you get decide how I feel? Just b/c you can't handle what I'm feeling doesn't give you the right to control how I express it. Get over yourself! This is the worst thing to say to someone that's upset. How about a little compassion? Oh, or is that beyond your...
    4vrUnique 4vrUnique 46-50 9 Responses Oct 1, 2009

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    Don't Tell Somone To Calm Down

    Okay, so maybe sometimes I do go a bit over board, but do not tell me to clam down. If you tell someone to calm down do you seriously think they're just gonna stop their rant and take a few deep breaths? No. It just makes that person go off even more. So unless you want someone...
    CrystallizedDream CrystallizedDream 16-17, F Oct 14, 2011

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    Just Hate It....

    It annoys me greatly when my friends like to say these words "calm down, relax, chillax" especially when i'm being neutral. There is a big difference when someone wants you to calm down and when they try to get on your nerve. As if they're expecting me to act like their lap dog...
    snownymph snownymph 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 1, 2011

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    It Makes Me Feel Like Im Not Important To You.

    I hate it when people tell me to calm down like my feelings are not important to you.  When my fiance told me to calm down by saying, Sit your happy a** down. , it surprised me and I started to do it.  We were at work together. We were the only ones in our business there...
    Donna072511 Donna072511 46-50 1 Response Apr 29, 2012

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    Ugh.

    Telling me to calm down when I'm getting pissed off is a guaranteed way to make me exponentially more angry and riled up.  Usually because they are blowing things out of proportion and acting like I'm the hulk or something and I'm going to explode which is ridiculous. An...
    shygirl14 shygirl14 26-30, F 3 Responses Sep 18, 2009

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    Stubborn Me

    When i am feeling an intense emotion, whether it be sad, angry, happy, worried.... All i want to do is sit around and feel that way. If i am sad i want to sit around and mope and feel bad, if someone comes and trys to make me feel better i usually find myself running away...
    cookielove4 cookielove4 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 12, 2011

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    Wrong Answer.

    I very rarely get really riled up but when I do, leave me a wide berth.  Telling me to calm down when I'm volatile is like pouring gasoline on a fire and the sh!t's really gonna hit the fan now. It's like pulling the pin on a grenade, in that it offers no solutions to the...
    zillaron zillaron 51-55, M 4 Responses May 26, 2009

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    You'll Get The Opposite Effect

    You will see in my eyes, how much that infuriates me. I have emotions, and I have the right to share my feelings with you. You have the right to be disinterested or not agree with me, but once you tell me to calm down, you will know what it really looks like to see someone...
    BiForce BiForce 26-30 1 Response Oct 6, 2012

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    NEVER Tell Me to "Relax," "Calm Down," Or "Lighten Up!"

    I have been told "calm down," "relax," and "lighten up" my whole life. What REALLY upsets me is when I'm in the ER in horrendous pain, and because oral pain meds aren't working, they have to start an IV. So there I am being poked...
    traceywhite traceywhite 31-35, F 1 Response Feb 24, 2009

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    It Makes Me Even More Mad

    When I'm annoyed all I want to do is smash things. Unfortunately I can't do that so I like to rant it out wherever I can. It makes me super angry when someone tells me to calm down. If it was in a soothing and meditative way then I possibly wouldn't have much of a problem but it...
    jheyjuneice jheyjuneice 18-21, F Aug 8, 2012

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    I Hate It!! It Makes It Worse!!

    Calm down! Relax! Chill out! Breath! Take a ****** chill pill?! NOOO I dont wana! I wana be mad and embrace it or I wana be me without being harrased about it, or i want to just rant, or i want u not to tell me to calm down cuz it wil **** me off....the end
    sweetmusic2011 sweetmusic2011 18-21, F Apr 4, 2011

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    *flinch*

    I've dealt with psych issues most of my life, and "You need to calm down" is right up there on the top 10 list of things I heard growing up.  But frankly, there are times that I was upset for good reason, and people just saw my psych profile and ignored the words. ...
    MossAgate MossAgate 31-35, F Aug 10, 2010

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    Dont Say Calm Down

    when im told to calm down i get worst. If you want me to calm down help with the problem, or give me weed. which ever one works for you.
    Kid5252 Kid5252 16-17, F Jul 13, 2013

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    Taking Responsibility For Anger When Told to Calm Down

    This message is to the angry man who dislikes being told to "calm down". I suppose that a lot of people do not like to be told to calm down. I don't like being told this particularly, however sometimes it is the right thing to do. To angry man(sorry that I...
    Aatma Aatma 51-55 2 Responses Sep 17, 2009

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    I Will Not Calm Down!

    When I'm upset or angry, I want to vent. I don't want someone telling me to calm down. I am feeling what I am feeling. You aren't going to stop these strong feelings just by telling me to calm down. I hate when the person that upsets you tells you to calm down. Who do they...
    yisrael yisrael 18-21, F 2 Responses Feb 23, 2009

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