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I Do Not Remember Jokes

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 92 People

    I Wish I Could...

    ... remember jokes! Even the shortest ones, when I'm convinced that I just cannot forget that one, I still do & it annoys me! I'm more like a spontaneous jokes, kinda silly & goofy, but not a joke teller. My mind is just not equipped for that role.
    misasja misasja 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 7, 2008

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    Love Jokes And Riddles Too

    Absolutely love good jokes... but when others are telling theirs.. I have a hard time remembering them to retell.. don't know why that is...
    txwoman2 txwoman2 36-40, F Feb 12, 2010

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    Handicap

    My most adorable quality perhaps is that I don't remember jokes. If it is a good one, I will laugh a second time as if I never heard it before. Needless to say that some friends love that. I mean, that's what I think. The bad side of the coin is that I'm unable to tell a joke...
    moreandless moreandless 56-60, M 1 Response Nov 11, 2010

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    I Only Remember A Few!

    It is hard for me to remember jokes, unless I write them down. This I read somewhere: "You are my best friend, but if the zombies are chasing us, I will trip you.". Cheers.
    xxxo222 xxxo222 46-50, F Sep 10, 2012

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    Here Is One I Just Heard

    A hillbilly knocks on the door of his new neighbor's house."Howdy, neighbor," he says, "In honor of you movin' into the holler, I'm gonna throw a party. There's gonna be a whole lotta drinkin', a whole lotta dancin', and a whole lotta screwin'.""Sounds like fun!" the neighbor...
    SpiritOfTheRabbit SpiritOfTheRabbit 31-35, F 2 Responses Nov 30, 2011

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    It Is Very Annoying To Me

    I also have a problem with remembering jokes but I think that perhaps I have the worse kind of affliction. I will remember that I heard a joke about a particular topic but not remember it well enough to tell it. Then unfortunately if I hear the joke again, I will remember the...
    rhouse rhouse 41-45 Nov 30, 2011

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    Lawl

    I don't remember jokes at all. WHen people go and tell me a joke. I go to tell someone else but end up telling them a different version of the joke. Haha.
    ascs ascs 22-25, F 3 Responses Jun 15, 2009

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    ?????

    . . . When Bill Gates died he went to heaven but asked St. Peter if he could return back home 'cause he'd forgotten something. . .  St. Peter adamantly said "NO!"  . . . Bill Gates insisted. . (scratches head) . . okay - so...
    Suckerpunch Suckerpunch 36-40 2 Responses May 27, 2008

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    Related Experiences

    The internet has spread so remarkably quickly its scary but wonderful at the same time. As long as we all remember to communicate with real people in real time as and when we can...
    girlfoxy girlfoxy 36-40, F 9 hrs ago

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    The weird kind of humour that comes from unfunny jokes. They only appeal to a very specific type of person, everyone else will just stare at you as if you're an idiot, roll their...
    iiCHARLIii iiCHARLIii 13-15, F Jan 18

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    My grandmother died in her late 80's but her birthday is coming up, and that always causes me to reminisce: The long walks we used to take to the shop in town, the 5 cents she...
    Rusham Rusham 66-70, M 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    A couple whose marriage was going on the rocks sought the advice of a marriage counsellor. The counsellor pleaded with them to patch up their quarrel, but they were adamant. "So...
    khenpal khenpal 51-55, M Dec 31, 2014

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    There was once a great actor who could no longer remember his lines. After many years he finds a theatre where they are prepared to give him a chance to shine again. The director...
    khenpal khenpal 51-55, M 4 Responses Dec 31, 2014

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    A pastor, who shall we say was "humor impaired," attended a conference to help encourage and better equip pastors for their ministry. Among the speakers were many well known and...
    lovingCuteSmartGirl lovingCuteSmartGirl 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 4

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    Cinderella wants to go to the ball, but her wicked stepmother won't let her. As Cinderella sits crying in the garden, her fairy godmother appears, and promises to provide...
    khenpal khenpal 51-55, M Jan 8

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    Warm Milk In a convent in Ireland, the 98-year-old Mother Superior lay dying. The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her last journey comfortable. They tried...
    Rusham Rusham 66-70, M 4 Responses Jan 18

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    Arnold and his wife were cleaning out the attic one day when he came across a ticket from the local shoe repair shop. The date stamped on the ticket showed that it was over eleven...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 3 Responses Jan 19

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    ??Tortoise and a Rabbit??wrote an entrance exam, ?? ??Tortoise got 80%, ??Rabbit got 81%. Both went for ??admission to an engineering college, Cut-off needed was 85...
    priyadharshan0 priyadharshan0 13-15, M Jan 20

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    Nine months ago Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. They loaded up Jack's mini-van and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible...
    khenpal khenpal 51-55, M 1 Response Jan 20

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    Now that I'm older... Now that I'm older.....here's what I've discovered..... I started out with nothing..I still have most of it. When did my wild oats turn into prunes and All...
    lovingCuteSmartGirl lovingCuteSmartGirl 18-21, F 3 Responses 4 days ago

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    A man gets up one morning to find his wife in the kitchen cooking. He looks to see what's she's cooking, and sees one of his socks in the frying pan. "what are you doing?" he asks...
    hancockian hancockian 66-70, M 1 Response 4 days ago

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    Recipe for a perfect marriage 1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, and enjoy good food. I go on Tuesdays, she goes on Fridays. 2. We also...
    undecided1129 undecided1129 18-21, F 7 Responses 4 days ago

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    A husband went to police station to report his missing wife..... Husband : I’ve lost my wife, she went shopping yesterday and has still not come home. Sergeant: What is her...
    undecided1129 undecided1129 18-21, F 8 Responses 3 days ago

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    IRISH SAUSAGES Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money between them; they could only raise the staggering sum of one Euro. Murphy said “Hang...
    Rusham Rusham 66-70, M 6 Responses 1 day ago

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    Stupid jokes can have me laughing all day lol.
    deleted deleted 26-30 Dec 31, 2014

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    I've got a lot of jokes about unemployed people... but they never work :/ ;)
    cnk2015 cnk2015 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 3

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    I laugh at my own jokes if they're based on your ugly- I mean, wonderful face :)
    SweeterThanToblerone SweeterThanToblerone 13-15, F Jan 9

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    I dunno many jokes but I know how to make ppl laugh with my unicorn mask :D
    Lolllipoop Lolllipoop 13-15, M Jan 18

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    Airport Jokes Getting on a plane, I told the ticket lady, "Send one of my bags to New York, send one to Los Angeles, and send one to Miami." She said, "We can't do that!" I told...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 31-35, F Jan 22

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    Doctor Jokes A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so he gave him another six months. My doctor grabbed me by the wallet and said, "Cough...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 31-35, F Jan 22

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    Hollywood Jokes Hollywood called me, asking me, "How much to do a movie with Farrah Fawcett?" "$50,000" They called back, "How about $20,000?" I said, "I'll pay it!" Farrah's...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 31-35, F Jan 22

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    Homeless Guys Jokes A bum asked me, "Give me $10 till payday." I asked, "When's payday?" He said, "I don't know, you're the one who is working!" A bum came up to me saying, "I...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 31-35, F 2 Responses Jan 22

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    Are all jokes some form of a riddle, or are riddles really a good joke?
    SkyllerRush SkyllerRush 16-17, M 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    Mr Roberts I don't know why I remember you but I do. I remember you always wore a black suit with a black waistcoat and and black flat cap. I remember your face was permanently...
    marmitemicky marmitemicky 70+, M 2 Responses Jan 5

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    do you remember what you said when you came to set me straight about my world? remember what you said, and did you think I wouldn’t recognize you girl? you can hide behind your...
    sumnerkagan sumnerkagan 46-50, M 1 Response Jan 16

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    I always feel bad for forgetting people's real names from Ep and other things like where they live, ages, and jobs. It's not on purpose. I promise. That is the type of...
    wintershawl wintershawl 36-40, F 6 Responses Jan 2

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    There is no way to substantiate what I am about to say, but then I guess this is not about proof. Through the help of others, I have learned that I have been around for a little...
    Drachona Drachona 18-21 Jan 17

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    Yeah. I remember it. But honestly I wouldn't care if I didn't remember it. I mean, it's nice to remember your first kiss, but mine kind wasn't worth remembering. It wasn't romantic...
    BananaSmoothiee BananaSmoothiee 18-21, F Jan 18

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    I was in my 8th grade english class in New Jersey. the whole class was silent while fox news was showing live footage of what was happening just 40 minutes away from us. When the...
    eggman667 eggman667 26-30, M 1 Response Jan 18

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    When I was younger I had this neighbour who was my best friend. We did everything together and we never understood why anybody used to make comments about us being so close. When...
    evieas123 evieas123 22-25, F 3 Responses Jan 3

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    My New Years Eve was supposed to be spent working a large house party, but instead I spent New Years Eve being waited on hand and foot and treated like a Queen. I met some of the...
    miryam57 miryam57 56-60, F Jan 4

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    I remember it was back when I was in first grade. I used to live in a large apartment complex with around 30 buildings, so a lot of friends I knew at the time all lived within a 50...
    RoddyB7589 RoddyB7589 16-17, M Jan 6

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    I Remember... what was considered offensive language. Much like the Fashion and Music of the 1960s and 1970s Groovy, Happening, Cool (yes cool was and always will be part of the...
    Tannasheart Tannasheart 51-55, F 1 Response Jan 8

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    I remember, I really remember, and I love books - still do - but I won't go back there. I can imagine a life without the internet, but I can't imagine a life without the internet.
    Clothed Clothed 41-45, M 2 Responses Jan 12

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    We all will one day met our end and I have a feeling that I might not know what comes next. I look at the ones who have already left, after the photos have been taken down and the...
    Drossi28 Drossi28 26-30, M Jan 15

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    If I connect with you, I will remember you for the rest of my life. My long term memory is great, however my short term memory is terrible.... Sooo, if you want me to remember ya...
    RyRyOfAwesomeness RyRyOfAwesomeness 13-15, M 2 Responses a week ago

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