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I Do Not Remember Jokes

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 87 People

    Lawl

    I don't remember jokes at all. WHen people go and tell me a joke. I go to tell someone else but end up telling them a different version of the joke. Haha.
    ascs ascs 22-25, F 3 Responses Jun 15, 2009

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    It Is Very Annoying To Me

    I also have a problem with remembering jokes but I think that perhaps I have the worse kind of affliction. I will remember that I heard a joke about a particular topic but not remember it well enough to tell it. Then unfortunately if I hear the joke again, I will remember the...
    rhouse rhouse 41-45 Nov 30, 2011

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    Love Jokes And Riddles Too

    Absolutely love good jokes... but when others are telling theirs.. I have a hard time remembering them to retell.. don't know why that is...
    txwoman2 txwoman2 36-40, F Feb 12, 2010

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    Handicap

    My most adorable quality perhaps is that I don't remember jokes. If it is a good one, I will laugh a second time as if I never heard it before. Needless to say that some friends love that. I mean, that's what I think. The bad side of the coin is that I'm unable to tell a joke...
    moreandless moreandless 56-60, M 1 Response Nov 11, 2010

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    ?????

    . . . When Bill Gates died he went to heaven but asked St. Peter if he could return back home 'cause he'd forgotten something. . .  St. Peter adamantly said "NO!"  . . . Bill Gates insisted. . (scratches head) . . okay - so...
    Suckerpunch Suckerpunch 36-40 2 Responses May 27, 2008

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    I Wish I Could...

    ... remember jokes! Even the shortest ones, when I'm convinced that I just cannot forget that one, I still do & it annoys me! I'm more like a spontaneous jokes, kinda silly & goofy, but not a joke teller. My mind is just not equipped for that role.
    misasja misasja 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 7, 2008

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    Here Is One I Just Heard

    A hillbilly knocks on the door of his new neighbor's house."Howdy, neighbor," he says, "In honor of you movin' into the holler, I'm gonna throw a party. There's gonna be a whole lotta drinkin', a whole lotta dancin', and a whole lotta screwin'.""Sounds like fun!" the neighbor...
    SpiritOfTheRabbit SpiritOfTheRabbit 31-35, F 2 Responses Nov 30, 2011

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    I Only Remember A Few!

    It is hard for me to remember jokes, unless I write them down. This I read somewhere: "You are my best friend, but if the zombies are chasing us, I will trip you.". Cheers.
    xxxo222 xxxo222 46-50, F Sep 10, 2012

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    Related Experiences

    I remember my first breakup it hurt me I cryer for 2 dayz straight I couldent get through it but I had close friends to help me out and get me back up to find a reatshionship agine...
    BasketballIsawesome BasketballIsawesome 13-15, F 1 hr ago

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    Time Served A woman awoke during the night to find that her husband was not in bed. She put on her robe and went downstairs. He was sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 26-30, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I tell jokes but there not funny is this funny. so my teacher said hey class write your essay remember 2-5 pages my response was ***** you crazy why would I ever do five I'm...
    GIRLYGIRL894 GIRLYGIRL894 26-30, F Jul 22

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    Q. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common? A. They're married. Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A. A widow...
    Michael91142 Michael91142 70+, M a week ago

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    Getting Forgetful Three old ladies sit in a diner, discussing their health. One lady says, "You know, I'm getting really forgetful. This morning, I was standing at the top of...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 1

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    These are actual ads seen in ''The Villages'' Florida newspaper. (Who says seniors don't have a sense of humor?) FOXY LADY : Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80's...
    orgasmic27 orgasmic27 26-30, M 2 Responses Jul 8

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    A Cynics Guide to Life: The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire. I believe for every drop of rain that falls, a flower grows And a...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 26-30, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    English Patient Previous Next An English guy was very ill and his son went to visit him in the hospital. Suddenly, the father began to breathe heavily and grabbed the pen and...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 1

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    English Patient Previous Next An English guy was very ill and his son went to visit him in the hospital. Suddenly, the father began to breathe heavily and grabbed the pen and...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 1

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    Forget About It An elderly husband and wife visit their doctor when they begin forgetting little things. Their doctor tells them that many people find it useful to write...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 26-30, F 3 Responses Jul 1

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    Here's one of the very few I can remember... Why are Hurricanes named after Women, when they come they are warm, and moist, when they leave they take your home, and Car, Likee...
    Hawkeyethenoo Hawkeyethenoo 66-70, M 1 Response Jul 1

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    Let’s enjoy one of the last Independence Days before our complete dependence on China. Let us remember as we fall asleep this Independence Day those who fight and the many that...
    Brunette4U Brunette4U 26-30, F Jul 4

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    Spending time with my 5 children. It's so nice when all of us are inside the car laughing exchanging jokes. My youngest kid loves this song...RUDE by Magic and he keeps on re...
    lemongrass09 lemongrass09 46-50, F Jul 6

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    Love when my friends try to tell jokes haha comment your jokes haha πŸ˜ŠπŸ‘ŒπŸ‘‡
    BeccaK1 BeccaK1 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 8

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    True Story of Two Wisconsin Duck Hunters Heard on a Wisconsin Radio Station A guy buys a new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500.00 with monthly payments of $560.00. He and a friend...
    hancockian hancockian 66-70 2 Responses Jul 8

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    I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the beat of the music. After...
    enriqueclasico enriqueclasico 26-30, M Jul 9

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    I failed at question 2,:( Check ur presence of mind.............Take d test. relax, clear your mind and begin, what's the 1st answer that comes to ur mind???........... 1. What...
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    People say that whenever one has a near death experience, their entire life span flashes in their minds eye within seconds. I suspect, if that ever happens to me, most of it would...
    karmameter karmameter 36-40, M 5 Responses Jul 12

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    A priest was taking a shortcut through an alley one day and came upon a young boy who was ************. "My son, you shouldn't be doing that," said the priest. "You should be...
    orgasmic27 orgasmic27 26-30, M 1 Response Jul 15

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    A man walks out into the street and immediately catches a taxi passing by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, 'Perfect timing! You're just like Morris!' Passenger: 'Who...
    orgasmic27 orgasmic27 26-30, M 3 Responses Jul 17

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    Funny Animal Puns-A horse is a very stable animal. If you hear it from the horse's mouth you're listening to a neigh sayer. After the horse ate all of his hay he had a baleful...
    restored87 restored87 46-50, F 1 Response Jul 17

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    Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even...
    darkice123 darkice123 36-40, M 1 Response Jul 17

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    I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the beat of the music...
    Tasha15Girl Tasha15Girl 13-15, F 2 Responses Jul 18

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    Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. Getting back together, they discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly Mother. The first said, "I built a...
    Tasha15Girl Tasha15Girl 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 18

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    Tasha15Girl Tasha15Girl 13-15, F 2 Responses Jul 19

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    In class one day, Mr. Johnson pulled Johnny over to his desk after a test, and said, "Johnny I have a feeling that you have been cheating on your tests." Johnny was astounded and...
    Tasha15Girl Tasha15Girl 13-15, F 2 Responses Jul 19

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    A man goes skydiving for the first time. After listening to the instructor for what seems like days, he is ready to go. Excited, he jumps out of the airplane. After a bit, he pulls...
    Michael91142 Michael91142 70+, M 1 Response Jul 22

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    Always remember that you are absolutely unique... Just like everyone else...
    LockieLeonard LockieLeonard 46-50, M 2 Responses Jul 22

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    In a courtroom, a pursesnatcher is on trial and the victim is stating what happened. She says, "Yes, that is him. I saw him clear as day. I'd remember his face anywhere." At which...
    Michael91142 Michael91142 70+, M 1 Response Jul 22

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    A Teenager is... A person who can't remember to walk the dog but never forgets a phone number. A weight watcher who goes on a diet by giving up candy bars before breakfast. A...
    Michael91142 Michael91142 70+, M 3 Responses a week ago

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    Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. A discussion that occurs when you're right, but he just hasn't realized it yet. Airhead (er*hed) n. What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled over...
    Michael91142 Michael91142 70+, M a week ago

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    A husband and wife were having dinner at a very fine restaurant when this absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big open-mouthed kiss, then...
    Inexperienced3 Inexperienced3 51-55, M 3 Responses a week ago

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    A man travelling by plane was in urgent need of the toilet. But each time he looked up, the illuminated sign proclaimed that it was occupied. The stewardess, aware of his...
    Michael91142 Michael91142 70+, M 4 Responses 4 days ago

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    Jack and Bob went skiing. After a few hours of driving north, they got caught up in a terrible blizzard and pulled into the driveway of a farm owned by a very rich widow. They went...
    DanCan1 DanCan1 56-60, M 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    yesterday i was typing things to google then i came across this, 'the world's funniest joke' i just remembered it now and i thought it'd be good to share: Two hunters are out in...
    ilovecavies ilovecavies 18-21, M 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    hancockian hancockian 66-70 5 Responses 2 days ago

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    Oldie but goodie. β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜…β˜… Adam and Eve said, 'Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we do not see you any more. We are lonesome...
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    Michael91142 Michael91142 70+, M 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    The jokes like..... "Dude....you were really drunk up last night......" "What? No....i wasnt...." "you were.....coz you threw my parrot against the wall and shouted...YOU ANGRY...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jul 1

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    Morecambe & Wise are my personal favorite comedians ever. One of my favorite jokes from their shows is the one where a police car goes past the window, with the siren blaring...
    LFCno1 LFCno1 22-25, M 2 Responses Jul 1