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I Do Not Remember Jokes

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 91 People

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    . . . When Bill Gates died he went to heaven but asked St. Peter if he could return back home 'cause he'd forgotten something. . .  St. Peter adamantly said "NO!"  . . . Bill Gates insisted. . (scratches head) . . okay - so...
    Suckerpunch Suckerpunch 36-40 2 Responses May 27, 2008

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    I Wish I Could...

    ... remember jokes! Even the shortest ones, when I'm convinced that I just cannot forget that one, I still do & it annoys me! I'm more like a spontaneous jokes, kinda silly & goofy, but not a joke teller. My mind is just not equipped for that role.
    misasja misasja 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 7, 2008

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    Here Is One I Just Heard

    A hillbilly knocks on the door of his new neighbor's house."Howdy, neighbor," he says, "In honor of you movin' into the holler, I'm gonna throw a party. There's gonna be a whole lotta drinkin', a whole lotta dancin', and a whole lotta screwin'.""Sounds like fun!" the neighbor...
    SpiritOfTheRabbit SpiritOfTheRabbit 31-35, F 2 Responses Nov 30, 2011

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    Handicap

    My most adorable quality perhaps is that I don't remember jokes. If it is a good one, I will laugh a second time as if I never heard it before. Needless to say that some friends love that. I mean, that's what I think. The bad side of the coin is that I'm unable to tell a joke...
    moreandless moreandless 56-60, M 1 Response Nov 11, 2010

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    It Is Very Annoying To Me

    I also have a problem with remembering jokes but I think that perhaps I have the worse kind of affliction. I will remember that I heard a joke about a particular topic but not remember it well enough to tell it. Then unfortunately if I hear the joke again, I will remember the...
    rhouse rhouse 41-45 Nov 30, 2011

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    I Only Remember A Few!

    It is hard for me to remember jokes, unless I write them down. This I read somewhere: "You are my best friend, but if the zombies are chasing us, I will trip you.". Cheers.
    xxxo222 xxxo222 46-50, F Sep 10, 2012

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    Lawl

    I don't remember jokes at all. WHen people go and tell me a joke. I go to tell someone else but end up telling them a different version of the joke. Haha.
    ascs ascs 22-25, F 3 Responses Jun 15, 2009

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    Related Experiences

    I was in first grade. We were coloring pictures when my teacher turned on the news. She was so freaked out. We didn't understand what was happening. I remember we all got out of...
    JustDevy JustDevy 18-21, F 2 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    The " M " word... by Jeff Foxworthy Have you ever wondered why it's OK to make jokes about Catholics, the Pope, Jews, Christians, the Irish, the Italians, the Polish, the Chinese...
    Inexperienced3 Inexperienced3 51-55, M 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    I asked my friend who was born in '90 if she remembered the time before the Internet. She noded, started to imitate the dial in tone and said that was the time when I had to go to...
    poppingcandyrulez poppingcandyrulez 36-40, F 10 Responses 1 day ago

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    I write stories in this nature frequently. And I rarely post them. But I promised myself I'd write this before I leave for school in just over three hours. I feel nostalgic. I was...
    IntenseCookie IntenseCookie 16-17, F 1 day ago

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    I wish I didn't remember my dreams. I have been having nightmares from hell. My dreams are very vivid, I can remember every detail. I feel as if I dreamed the same dream over and...
    Southerncharm67 Southerncharm67 46-50, F 3 Responses 3 days ago

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    A man walked out to the street and immediately catches a taxi in New York City. The cabbie says, "Perfect timing, you're just like Brian. " Passenger: "Who?" Cabbie: "Brian...
    Rusham Rusham 66-70, M 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    I remembered that someone with white dress put me inside a blue plastic baby bath tubs. I remembered that I seems short-sighted at that moment. I can only see thing close to me. I...
    PrincessGabrielle PrincessGabrielle 36-40, F 4 days ago

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    I worked for the local news paper for a lot of years and I still remember what one of the press guys did as a joke on one of the bosses in the press room. Sean he is one of the...
    Lockiel45 Lockiel45 46-50, M a week ago

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    Jokes and riddles which are non sex related are the best ones :)
    NickoliShang NickoliShang 18-21, M Aug 27

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    I remember when we (African Americans) were so intimidated by the word "black" it was an insult for someone to refer to you that way! I remember when I was in Junior High I was...
    orionnights orionnights 51-55, F Aug 27

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    The boss returned from lunch in a good mood and called the whole staff in to listen to a couple of jokes he had picked up. Everybody, but one girl laughed uproariously. "What's...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Aug 26

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    What do you call a frog in the secret service?? Infrognito Dad jokes are the best jokes, no lie :)
    sfairy27 sfairy27 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 26

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    I love jokes and hope all of u do pls say yes
    tifalufairah tifalufairah 13-15, F Aug 26

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    this is website is full of jokes love it http://unlimitedshortjokes.weebly.com/
    Kyle178 Kyle178 22-25, M 1 Response Aug 25

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    this is website is full of jokes love it http://unlimitedshortjokes.weebly.com/
    Kyle178 Kyle178 22-25, M Aug 25

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    So i was in PRESCHOOL when i had my first crush. His name was danny and i remember his dad was some sort of football couch and Danny was sooo adorable anyway, i remember me and my...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Aug 24

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    When I was 16 my neighbor boy who was 18 and I were listening to records in his bedroom. We had been neighbors for 4 years and we frequently listened to music together and walked...
    kingaroo kingaroo 66-70, M Aug 23

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    Long ago, a fall day at about mid afternoon. There was a young new born in a plastic high chair, slamming a spoon. Until the spoon dropped to the floor with a clang. With that...
    cdhewko39 cdhewko39 36-40, M Aug 23

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    Rather than continually remember the terrible event of what happened to him, best to remember him this way .. The cheeky bugger!
    Gavriella Gavriella 26-30, F 1 Response Aug 22

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    I remember HIM.. I remember every second I spent with him.. I kinda miss talking to him now.. I had a big time crush on my best friend long ago.. but I never opened up my feelings...
    amazingmoment90 amazingmoment90 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 21

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    She is not a good person, she knows, because if she were a good person then she would not be leaning into this boy. If she were a good person, she wouldn’t let him wrap his arm...
    calimaki123 calimaki123 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 20

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    A man goes skydiving for the first time. After listening to the instructor for what seems like days, he is ready to go. Excited, he jumps out of the airplane. After a bit, he pulls...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 4 Responses Aug 18

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    I remember my first day at school quite well. I walked into the classroom feeling scared. I waited in line by our teacher's desk so she could put a name tag on us and then she...
    Gavriella Gavriella 26-30, F 2 Responses Aug 17

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    Sometimes I'll remember the scent of the cigarettes and the smell of beer soaked men and just begin to cry. My mind won't give me the whole picture and for that I'm glad because I...
    Holmesdown Holmesdown 16-17, F 1 Response Aug 17

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    back when I was 9 or 10 years old I had a friend that lived next door to me, he was younger by 3 years but I remember he knocked on my door one day and asked if I could come play...
    jbm1984 jbm1984 31-35, F 1 Response Aug 16

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    It has been 17 months now since I got my first kiss, and I STILL cant forget him! It was the best thing ever, at a summer camp, near a lake. I am afraid that I will always have a...
    wandereris wandereris 18-21 2 Responses Aug 16

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    I remember very well and I am still with her. First time I saw her was last year round the end of January. We met at a small birthday party of a mutual close friend (friend not...
    Padresfan Padresfan 18-21, M Aug 16

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    Three old ladies were sitting side by side in their retirement home in Miami reminiscing. The first lady recalled shopping at the green grocers and demonstrated with her hands, the...
    Rusham Rusham 66-70, M 4 Responses Aug 16

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    So many inside jokes and they'll have us laughing for hours and other people just think we're crazy!
    izzycg izzycg 18-21, F Aug 16

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    This is my story. Let's take a trip back to the year 2004. I was just starting high school and I had just turned 15. I had 8 classes. One of the classes I took was called music...
    johnnyr860 johnnyr860 22-25, M 2 Responses Aug 16

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    Last year, I made a YouTube tribute to it. I felt like I had to make something for the anniversary. It wasn't much thou, just a slide show of pictures and a song that went with...
    odessa94 odessa94 18-21, F 4 Responses Aug 16

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    I will always remember her, even if she deems it best to distance herself from me for the duration of my time here. You can't fall out of love that easily.
    beautifulbizarre beautifulbizarre 16-17, F Aug 16

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    First day of kindergarten. I lived and still do in NYC when this happened.. I can't remember anything else besides first day of kindergarten though
    deleted deleted 26-30 Aug 16

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    Two elderly people lived in a retirement community, he was a widower and she a widow, had known each other for a number of years. One evening there was a community supper in the...
    Rusham Rusham 66-70, M 7 Responses Aug 15

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