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I Don't Know How to Break Down My Defensive Wall

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 100 People

    Life After Abuse

    I was also abused in a 11 year marriage and have two great kids from that time. I have been hiding behind my kids, work, college. I managed to get my bachelor's degree with an online university. I've been divorced for over 6 years. A few nice men have asked me out, but I...
    michlhi michlhi 41-45 Aug 11, 2010

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    At Long Last

    I fell in love with my current boyfriend back when I was 12.  We never dated through out high school, and later in life he broke my heart.   I've since created a wall around my heart.  For the first time, we actually started a relationship with each other. ...
    NoOneOfConsequence NoOneOfConsequence 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 20, 2008

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    Instincts

    I do not know how to tear down walls that have been built by unconscious processes. In all honesty, I don't think I would want to break down my walls.  They are there for a reason.  They are there to protect me.  They are the result of time and of lessons learned.  No longer...
    permafrost21 permafrost21 22-25, F 2 Responses Aug 22, 2012

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    How Do You Trust Enough, and How Do I Handle the Pain That Is Bound to Come?

    Every time my wall comes down, I end up getting hurt ... and I don't mean just a little hurt, no, the real thing When I let people in, I really let them in, and more often then not, I get the sand kicked in my eyes.
    kinkitty kinkitty 36-40, F 50 Responses Apr 27, 2008

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    I Just Don't Know How To Fix It

    Hey, I'm in a relationship with this guy who loves me and I live him back, but I can't give him or anyone in my life my complete love because it's guarded by a wall. This wall is so strong, it sometimes feels like it's phycically there. History:  I haven't always been...
    Lyssmix Lyssmix 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 27, 2010

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    Looking For a Job

    I hate being a teenager looking for a job. I walk into a store that looks promising, a store that looks as though it is hiring, with head held up high. But then I walk inside the store itself and boom! It's like all my self-confidence has flown into the ionosphere. I don't...
    rustyguy rustyguy 18-21, M 1 Response Sep 3, 2008

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    Here is Practical Explanation about Next Life,

    Purpose of Human Life, philosophical/religious facts, theories etc. ___________________________ *********** Practical Explanation ( For Example ) :- `1st of all can you tell me every single seconds detail from that time when you born ?? ( i need every seconds detail ?? that what...
    bolt0 bolt0 22-25, M Dec 8, 2013

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    Cold Dark Mask :D

    i hid my emotions. i never let it out. because if i did she wouldn't tell me how she was feeling. i was down but still more stable then she was. i now really struggle to get rid of my emotion . i can express it but i bottle it up and up and just cant get rid of it ! >.<...
    MiskaMaskedOne MiskaMaskedOne 18-21 Sep 26, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    When you thought it's yours when it's not. Now I know why I like specific things. Solving a puzzle without the right answer is hard, taking the next level is not easy and...
    etude etude 18-21, F 1 hr ago

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    I don't know what kind of people I want in my life. I don't know what to do about my failing education. I don't know what I want to do for a career. I don't even know what my...
    whaleking whaleking 16-17, M 1 Response 10 hrs ago

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    Growing up I didn't have very good learning experiences socially. My parents didn't have friends and we didn't really spend time with family so I was pretty isolated. Both my...
    LaGentilleDame LaGentilleDame 31-35, F 16 hrs ago

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    I just don't know because I don't have a lot of friends at school because I like school and homework and tests so people tease me and I really don't care when they do but I start...
    AmyPond11th AmyPond11th 13-15, F 1 Response 16 hrs ago

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    I've gotten to the point in my life where I've figured out who my parents favorites are out of my siblings and I'm neither of their favorite. In fact, I'm probably the most loathed...
    Gcardenas Gcardenas 18-21, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I happen to see a guy I use to work with. We started talking about everything, nothing special. Then he asked me about one of my old friends. You see I had asked her out and she...
    solojo solojo 31-35, M 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    I've come to the conclusion that I can't be a real person. It's like someone tried to make a person and made some mistakes, so here i am. Everyone I knows wants something, whether...
    geminixleo geminixleo 18-21, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Sometimes I really don't know what the hell is going on with me or anything else. But most of the time I really just feel like I'm not even real and then I find myself feeling...
    Killljoy Killljoy 18-21 1 day ago

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    I've been reading a book on how to better discipline my children, pretty much how to get them to listen to me better. I ran out of options, tried everything I could think of. I...
    motherwhowantstheworld motherwhowantstheworld 26-30, F 1 day ago

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    I like someone, and I just learn that he's in love too but I don't know how to love him so I say no to his feeling! :( (I didn't told him that I love him)
    Ppurplepang Ppurplepang 18-21, F 2 days ago

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    I've been plagued by contempt for my father for many years, and I'm trying to figure out if it's just an issue with my brain, with me as a person, or if I was actually emotionally...
    expandingforward expandingforward 36-40, M 4 days ago

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    I have many, many medical issues physical and emotional and am only 28 years old. I cannot get permanent disability I keep trying though but meanwhile I am on temporary disability...
    butterflyangels2387 butterflyangels2387 26-30, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    At first you're serious and feel like you know what you're doing. It's tiresome but it feels like you have control. Then, you loosen up. It feels good and right - like you've made...
    FittingUsername FittingUsername 22-25, M 4 days ago

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    I really don't know who I am anymore. Or what I want. I had the perfect life 7 months ago nothing could've been better. Now I hate everything and can't stand anything about my life...
    IngloriousJoker IngloriousJoker 18-21, M 1 Response 5 days ago

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    Whenever someone gives me a compliment i just stare at them like they grew two heads while my face is bright red and feels really hot.
    IHateYourSmile IHateYourSmile 13-15, F 5 days ago

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    I'm really shy when I meet people I don't know although sometimes if I meet someone and we get on straightaway then I am fine. I remember when I was young I was so shy I never...
    Tofi786 Tofi786 22-25, F 6 days ago

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    I always compliment others, but whenever they compliment me I just feel weird and think about how exaggerated they sound so I sometimes awkwardly say thanks to end it all ??
    Theworldandme Theworldandme 16-17, F a week ago

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    I can't tell if someone is flirting with me or just being nice/friendly.
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jul 22

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    I wouldn't realise if anyone was flirting with me, as I don't think I'm goof enough for anyone to want me and obviously my flirting skills are really bad, otherwise I wouldn't be...
    rapsel rapsel 22-25, M Jul 22

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    I had this convo yesterday in my car and I didnt realize what was happening. The guy: How come I never see you? Me: its probably because I'm the invisible one in my family. A lot...
    TheNewBatman TheNewBatman 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 22

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    I just had a DNA test to prove that the man on my birth certificate is not my father. I am 46 and knew my whole life, but my mother was in deep denial. The man who is my father is...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jul 22

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    I just lose myself sometimes. I know that I am strong and that I can make it through a lot of things, but when it seems like, with the exception of some friends, that I am the only...
    AverageJane123 AverageJane123 18-21, F Jul 21

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    I have no idea how to flirt, and I can't recognize it for the life of me. I hope my future girl understands that.
    stewartgreen stewartgreen 18-21, M 1 Response Jul 21

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    What I consider or think; is a conversation, is flirting... Life is so weird.
    deademotion11 deademotion11 22-25, M 1 Response Jul 21

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    I really have no clue how to flirt as I don't feel I am attractive and think if I flirt people might think I have a swell head and not want to flirt with me back I also don't...
    susangoga susangoga 31-35, F 4 Responses Jul 21

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    Does anyone else have the issue of being too earnest to flirt? I suppose part of my issue is, one, I can't be glib when it comes to matters of the heart, and two, I am sincere when...
    jdhammer84 jdhammer84 31-35, M 1 Response Jul 21

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    I feel like something g should be happening my best friend almost died two months ago in a skiing accident and everyone was crying but I didn't feel like it would drastically...
    nannalovet113 nannalovet113 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 21

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    I'm in relationship with two boys and I'm dating and going out with one of them.But I don't like him enough and I can't show him my feeling and he wants me to do some flirty things...
    maryviolin maryviolin 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 17

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    Hi my name is Preston and I have lived a long and sad 16 years of life. For so long I have wondered why am I so different, why do I care about others more than myself, why do I...
    myfriendscallmeDePreston myfriendscallmeDePreston 16-17, M Jul 16

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    well this isn't exactly true. I wish I could be able to not feel emotions. i am too emotional and too sensitive and I hate how my face is so readable.
    Adaeze123 Adaeze123 13-15, F Jul 16

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    I am 23 years old. I have made $350,000 dollars in the last five years. I have a two and a half year old son. His mother and i have been involved in a very bitter lawsuit for the...
    ihavenoimaginationatall ihavenoimaginationatall 22-25, M Jul 15

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    Or a lot of the time actually. I came on here in the hopes of making some good friends and having an outlet for things that bother me or are giving me trouble in life. For advice...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jul 15

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    Why I want to keep trying so hard at something that is long gone. Why I keep lying to everyone including myself. I don't know why I can't be honest and say I am not okay, that i...
    TiredOfBeingHurt TiredOfBeingHurt 18-21, F Jul 14

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    So I told the guy I find him interesting and I love his eyes - by Facebook chat. He sent a smile and said thank you. ... and that's it. LOL I feel good anyways, because I had...
    Blackberries Blackberries 26-30, F 4 Responses Jul 14

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