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I Don't Know Who I Am Anymore

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,856 People

    I Don't Know Who I Am Anymore...

    My life has been long and harsh, at merely thirty, I have tried to make the best of bad events. As a child my father died and I lived with my mother and brother. I was only 5 when my father died and I was told he died of a broken heart. Later I found out he committed suicide, and...
    tjtaz tjtaz 26-30 3 Responses Dec 29, 2011

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    Im Not Who I Used To Be

    Everyday i hear the sound Of the heartache knocking at my door I have no choice but to let it in And watch it transform who i was before Memories grow distant People change I no longer see, feel, smell , taste , sound the same I have been betrayed By those i loved My sister...
    Violet86 Violet86 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 5, 2011

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    I had a very strong sense of self

    as a child. I protected animals from kids who tried to torture them. I stood in between two of my friends who were fighting, and got punched in the face. I knew what I believed, and always stood up for it. Gradually, I lost my confidence. I don't know why. Maybe it was because I...
    HollywoodNil HollywoodNil 22-25, F 1 Response May 16

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    I've always been a determined person,

    I knew exactly what I wanted. Now I'm not so sure of it anymore. This year I'm second-guessing everything: who I am,what I value the most and which should be my priorities. I've always cared about grades and studying was important to me although most of my excellent results...
    IcedPhoenix IcedPhoenix 18-21, F Mar 31

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    i'm only 15 and i'm already lost,

    i just hate the fact that i don't have a real personality and that i'm not mentally Stable and can't make my own decision, i don't know what to do with my life and worser than that is i don't see the point of doing things/living. one minute i'm fine and the other i'm sad and...
    shayy13 shayy13 13-15, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I have change and change

    and change for the people in my life, and now i don't even know who i am anymore.. Any way that i can get back my real self? I am sick of being in the middle of two personalities.
    Violinmelody Violinmelody 13-15, F 3 Responses May 2

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    I'Ve Never Really Known What I Wanted In Life

    From my father, I was taught to please others. This means to tell people what they want to hear, and try to become someone a bit different in order to make them like me. The thing is, I've been doing this my whole life, with so many people, that I don't know who I am or what I...
    CurlyBee CurlyBee 18-21, F 3 Responses Mar 31, 2013

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    I Lost Myself When I Lost My Job

    I lost my job early 2007. Before that I lost my spouse to an affair within the family at the end of 2005 with a 10 month old baby.  I was lost. I didn't know what to do. I had no friends because I never was the friend type. I never wanted to talk about myself. I have to many...
    Lee1967 Lee1967 41-45 1 Response Mar 12, 2011

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    As part of the International Baccalaureate

    Programme that I study and one of the compulsory courses, I have Theory of Knowledge which basically questions our own knowledge. How do we know that the sky is blue, when we are not entirely sure whether other people see the same colour by the definition of 'blue'. We question...
    Cebe123 Cebe123 16-17 1 Response Jan 7

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    Where Did Kathie Go? I Sure Miss Her......

    I'm a happy person....I'll get over this. But, I want to stop and write this. I am sad...I miss myself. Indulge me, please. Four years ago I moved my demented, mostly blind, physically challenged Mother to the city I live in. I am her caregiver everyday....not 24/7, but close...
    Kathieredart Kathieredart 56-60, F 5 Responses Aug 19, 2012

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    My Biggest Frustration In Life Is Not Being Who My Parents Want Me To Be

    I am constantly trying to seek their approval. and it is very difficult. I am constantly destroying who I am so that I may be able to be who they need me to be. I stopped wanting to be liked by others because that got in the way of being who my parents needed me to be. I...
    alice1234569 alice1234569 26-30, F 3 Responses Sep 21, 2013

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    My Constant Self Discovery

    'Out of everything and everyone I've lost... I miss myself the most.' When you’re little adults ask who you want to be when you grow up, and once you tell them they respond with such excitement and encouragement... but what they fail to tell you is... life has its own plans for...
    cherrytomatoes cherrytomatoes 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 21, 2013

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    There's A Scared Little Girl Inside Of Me.

    Since I can remember, I have defined myself through the eyes of others, looking outwards for their acceptance, approval and love.. Sometimes these  others were family, friends and boyfriends,  and at other times they were books, tv programmes, films..  I looked for...
    littlerusalka littlerusalka 26-30, F 4 Responses Oct 6, 2010

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    I'm not sure what I want.

    A long life.. With everything I'm supposed to have, or a short one.. Live fast, die young.. Be wild and have fun, take life in one big bang and be dangerous, reckless, and carefree...
    Rosaalie Rosaalie 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 22

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    I don't feel right the way

    that I am. I really don't like to specify which gender I was born as. I feel like a freak sometimes.
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Feb 8

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    Death Of The Insect

    Zig/zag. Left/right. Participation should not require effort. It is the sacrifice that is difficult and even then, holding on to any kind of identity you think you have is relatively meaningless as you make the transition from free spirited day dreaming waster to nine 'till...
    secto secto 22-25, M Sep 17, 2013

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    I Don't Know Who I Am Anymore

    Ever since I was a kid I tried to fit in with the cool kids. The only way I could figure out how to do that is to act like them. Ever since I started kindergarten it worked! Years passed though and my parents fight a lot these days (but thats a different life story of mine...
    ExperienceRush ExperienceRush 70+, M 1 Response Sep 22, 2013

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    The world is telling me to be myself,

    and the right person will come, but at the same time I'm being told that I'm either not good enough or need to be "adjusted" in some way, shape, or form to be considered worth the effort. I don't really know what is right from what is wrong... If I change, anybody who I gain...
    IMightBeSociallyAwkward IMightBeSociallyAwkward 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 12, 2013

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    I started changing in my mind

    when I was 17. I witnessed a car accident and tried to help the girl that got hit. I ripped her door off and pulled her out. She died in my arms. After that I threw myself into the one thing I knew I had and that was Football. I played my senior year of high school football...
    FamilyMan79 FamilyMan79 22-25, M 1 Response Jun 25

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    What Happened?

    When I was a little kid life was simple, I knew who I was, I wanted to be and astronaut when I grew up and I liked candy. I don't even like candy anymore. I don't know who I am, what kind of person am I? I'm all alone and have no one to talk to and no friends. How can I define...
    FoolYourself FoolYourself 16-18, M 17 Responses Dec 3, 2007

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    I miss the taste of your lips on mine I miss

    the way your freckles looked in the sun I missed the sound of your truck pulling up to pick me up I miss our tickle fights I miss your bear hugs I miss our late night texts I miss the way you looked at me I miss your touch and the way it gave me goosebumps I miss the old you...
    hopeless1012 hopeless1012 18-21, F Jun 20

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    As the weeks and months pass I find myself

    becoming more lost without purpose or place. I used to define myself by what I considered meaningful or.....purposeful, a reason to get up in the morning a meaning to go to bed. Now it all seems pointless and repetitive tasks, the joy is gone and I'm scared like never before. I...
    fadedmind fadedmind 26-30, M Apr 2

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    Please help. I am struggling in life right now

    and could really use some advice/guidance. I am 24 years of age. Growing up, I was practically raised by my grandparents. I never met my father, and my mother lived with her boyfriend (now husband), and never had time for me except for around the holidays and a visit here and...
    WantingAnAnswer WantingAnAnswer 22-25, F Jan 23

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    I Leave In Hell

    i made a mistake 4 years ago n contracted HIV i wanna 4get about it n start afresh even though am infected but i just dont know how n there is nobody 2 help me i have no job n the poverty in our family is a constant reminder that am suffering from a fatal illness please anybody...
    best32 best32 22-25 4 Responses Dec 13, 2012

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    I don't know what i want,

    I don't know what i want to do. I had became numb to not get hurt, Now I am not sad, but not happy either. I know i am not doing good to myself, but this numbness is working like a drugs to me and i am unable to getting out of it. I am feeling like i am being cursed. I hate...
    visibleme visibleme 18-21, F 5 Responses Feb 22

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    When Darkness Falls

    When darkness falls, Dwell you there When darkness falls, Waiting patiently When darkness falls, I'm drawn to you When darkness falls, Passion breaks through When darkness falls, Touch you me When darkness falls, Torn at the heart When darkness falls, Hearts been branded...
    inChange inChange 41-45, M 3 Responses May 23, 2013

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    What Am I Now? What Have I Become?

    I lie a lot. Really, I do. It has become a force of habit. It makes me sad because I want to be normal. However, I am not. No-one is really, but when I say it I mean something else. I am an achieved public speaker and debater. I am gifted in the one department I should not...
    linderbreak linderbreak 22-25 1 Response Mar 20, 2011

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    Lost

    Hello everyone. I needed to write this story, because its been heavy on my mind... I dont know who i am. I only have a slight clue as to who i want to be. I think the real me is somewhere lost in all the things i want to be. How is someone suppose to find out who they really...
    GettingOverShit GettingOverShit 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 22, 2013

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    I morph into the people I'm around.

    But I want to be me. I don't know how. I feel lost and helpless. I don't know what to do.
    kaiiiiitlyn kaiiiiitlyn 18-21, F 7 Responses Jan 16

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    I've lost myself and everything in my world

    that is important to me. I recently lost my wife because of online affairs and ***********. The fantasy of being with someone else was all a lie. The true love of my life is gone now. I am alone. I wish I never hurt her the way I have. I have broke her heart so many times...
    Qman85 Qman85 26-30, M 1 Response Feb 8

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    No Idea

    I can't even recognize myself anymore, or could I ever? I'm so confused. I feel like I'm losing my personality, or whatever I had left of it. I have no idea what's in store for me, and I don't enjoy thinking about the future. Who am I? I feel so dry, boring, lifeless. I feel...
    flyawayhome flyawayhome 22-25, F 6 Responses Feb 4, 2010

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    I Don't Think I Ever Have! *Very Long Sorry*

    I think a really big thing that I struggle with is I don't know who I am and I have just been searching for so long and coming up with nothing. When I was in high school I always had a lot of friends, I was always well liked I never was made fun of never had any issues with...
    northernlightsalaska333 northernlightsalaska333 22-25, F Oct 9, 2013

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    I go thru stages on a daily basis

    and they are sometimes hard to deal with. I'm happy one moment and in the blink of an eye I feel like my world is falling apart. Sometimes there's a trigger for these feelings and yet for the most part there's not. I break out into uncontrollable tears for no logical reason at...
    Learning2LuvMe Learning2LuvMe 31-35, F 3 Responses Jul 9

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    No One Really Knows Who They Are ....

    In my 33 years of living, I would have to say that my late teens and 20's were just one huge identity crisis. It was a crisis because I was desperately searching for a sense of self that was lost into adulthood. I am not a know-all kind of guy ( I actually know very little about...
    bedevo33 bedevo33 31-35, M 2 Responses Jul 27, 2012

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    I Am Turning Into Pleasure Seeking Creature.

    I was living a false life created by some fantasy and stories of a hero. To have hope, to have a purpose, a goal of life it is a bliss, even if it is a fake one. But the illusion is faded. My retreat place is no longer be provided. Now i lost my grip, now i lost my will. The...
    blackravencat blackravencat 22-25, M 1 Response Sep 21, 2013

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    Identity Crisis

    Before I fell in love, I was volitile. I slept under bridges and drank natty ice in front of police. I wrote poetry, I lived like it was a story, I burned bright. Now I go to college, and I have an almost steady job. I count calories because I am no longer walking eight to ten...
    livelikemakebelieve livelikemakebelieve 18-21 1 Response Nov 11, 2010

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    I live three lives, and only one of them is the

    real me. At school, I am reserved and very introverted. At home, I am more talkative but I'm still not the real me. I am only myself when I'm online. I wish I could just stop living separate lives and feel comfortable being myself.
    CompassionateCoffee CompassionateCoffee 13-15 4 Responses May 21

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    Splitting Me

    You know how Bruce Wayne is Batman and Peter Parker is Spiderman? How they go out and be someone else and keep it all organized between the two egos? I sort of feel I have a split of two lives but not exactly as easy and organized as putting on a spandex outfit and go out crime...
    UnfinishedEmily UnfinishedEmily 22-25 2 Responses May 21, 2012

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    Dont Know Who I Am Or What I Want In Life Anymore!!

    I used to be such a loud child, so playfull, i was always low in confidence but i was out playing. I liked school until i got to secondry school. I was quiet in school, so i guess that made me a target, because i would never pay any attention, i was pushed and shoved but it never...
    lisastacey3 lisastacey3 22-25, F 3 Responses May 28, 2011

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    I'm a young woman working in the financial

    industry but what I really want is to have a family and stay at home.
    Fanzoe Fanzoe 22-25, F 1 Response Jul 9

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    I always thought that I had a strong sense of

    myself. That I knew who I was, when in reality I was being what people wanted me to be, but I didn't even realise because it was who I wanted to be in a sense. I would pull characteristics from the tv shows, movies, books etc. that I would watch/read and try my best to be them...
    WhoIreallyam WhoIreallyam 16-17, F Mar 19

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    Who Am I ?

    I feel so lost sometimes I will look in the mirror and though I know it's my face don't recognise myself anymore. I have messed up my life so many times trying to be something I'm not, I use to lie about who I was or things I had done to get people to accept me because I was...
    sototallybroken sototallybroken 26-30, F 3 Responses Nov 22, 2011

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    I just don't know. It isn't in a sad context of

    not knowing, just the fact that my entire life has been a lie. I also don't understand why I have been having more dreams lately, both nightmares and simplistic dreams. I've had one or two every night now for the past week. I'm just getting confused about a lot of things, I feel...
    treasureforever treasureforever 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 15

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    I Just Dont Anymore. . .

    . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . .. :-(
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Sep 2, 2013

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    So Confused

    Up until the day before yesterday I thought i knew who i was. Well, not really, but i had one part of me who i thought i knew, the only part that iv been sure of when everything else evaporated. And now im questioning that. In high school I was the music chick, the bass player...
    jazzcataly jazzcataly 22-25, F 2 Responses Jun 23, 2011

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    Time Can Heal Anything, So Why Isn't It Healing Me?

    Going back to last summer, I met a guy, fell in love, and I was sucked into a whole different world. The world I used to be against. The one I never wanted to so much as breathe upon. Every day and every night I was out with him and his friends. They'd be selling weed and...
    breathethestars breathethestars 18-21, F 1 Response May 5, 2010

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    I look in the mirror,

    and I don't know this girl staring back at me. She's a stranger. How can this girl possibly be me? If you asked me 3 years ago how I thought my life would be, I never thought I'd be here. Living this pain filled nightmare. I've done so many things I thought I would never do...
    LoveandLoss17 LoveandLoss17 16-17, F Jul 11

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    Sometimes I feel like we join a particular

    personality group based on our personal appearance. Then I think that we only see our perception of how we feel on the inside. I don't look like anyone else in the world and I don't know how I really feel about me so when I look in the mirror, I see a ghost of my childhood. I...
    babaluba babaluba 36-40, M 2 Responses Mar 8

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    I Wish I Could Be Who I Want To Be

    So many people believe that they are different but the truth is I think I am the most different of them all. I am almost 24 years old, never had a boyfriend in my life, never kissed a guy, never slept around, never been to a club, never gotten really drunk, etc. I am the type of...
    skydancer24 skydancer24 22-25, F 5 Responses Jan 21, 2012

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    Gone

    What am I, Who am I, Where have I gone   Look at me, Can’t you see, what I’ve become   He takes me; He rapes me, and tortures my soul   Just let me be, set me free, I want to be whole   The pain I feel is so very real I’m just dead...
    mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality 36-40, F 1 Response Nov 21, 2007

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    I've always been a very lonely person.

    Never had more than 1 friend at a time, for no longer than a year. Im also a person when asked to, can never point out their own talents or even what their favorite color is. Because I don't have one. I could never tell you anything about my personality either. Because unlike...
    StillBlockingOutTheWorld StillBlockingOutTheWorld 13-15, F 1 Response Dec 22, 2013

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    I thought i always knew

    who i was, but in the past year everything has been so confusing in my life. I went from having who i thought were my family; 3 siblings, a mom and dad, to finding out my siblings abused me when i was younger with my father, and still have bad intentions for me even today. I don...
    gardengirl17 gardengirl17 22-25, F 3 Responses Apr 3

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    Related Experiences

    Seriously I haven't belonged anywhere, ever. Only a select few have really proven to be worth even considering a friend, whatever that word means anymore. I use to think I was the...
    CrimsonSkull CrimsonSkull 13-15, M 2 days ago

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