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I Don't Understand Myself Sometimes

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,294 People

    Contemplating

       How can I know so much yet still want to go against what I know is the best thing to do. How can I know I'm heading for a cliff at 120mph yet still not hit the brakes when I see the edge.Oh yeah I forgot....................... I'm a stupid human.One day I want to do...
    rescue3 rescue3 31-35, M 3 Responses Jan 5, 2010

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    Understanding All My Personalities

    Well for a little over a month now I've been able to stay of my medication without any downsides. As of yesterday night I felt a relapse coming on, it's this feeling of having a dark blanket thrown over my being. Basically I felt off last night. All of insecurities came back to...
    EyesOfSeraphim EyesOfSeraphim 26-30, F Jun 23, 2011

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    Tonight

    I don't understand what we had in common, what we used to discuss, as all of a sudden any communication has become strained.  The intellect I once seen in you is full of holes and we seem to have swapped places.  I feel pity for you as you never appreciate what is in...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Jan 17, 2009

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    Things Girls Do

    OK, so I'd like to share some things I don't understand about the female gender... myself included. If I missed anything, leave me a comment! Also comment if you do any of the things I am about to mention. Self control OK, is it me or do girls have literally no self control? I...
    Dancergirl3 Dancergirl3 13-15 1 Response Sep 14, 2013

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    There's this guy. We hung out the other day

    and he was really nice to me and all. I had tons of fun and he was such a gentleman. But then he tried to kiss me. Being the blonde I am, my brain kinda froze up and I didn't know what to do so I turned away. So he just hugged me instead. I really don't know what to do about...
    JustAskAnything JustAskAnything 13-15, F 1 Response Sep 8

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    How is a movie capable of completely destroying

    my mood. Its like i'm so complex i can relate to every character in every movie so their pain becomes my pain. It makes me feel worthless like i don't deserve love and the love i give isn't strong enough. How can a movie make me feel like that. How do i make it stop? Right now i...
    TwystedAbyss TwystedAbyss 18-21, M 2 Responses Jan 28

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    Is Dating/marriage Really Worth It?

    I just had a talk with this girl that's not exactly my girlfriend, but we both really like each other. She asked if I've ever had a girlfriend, and I said no. She asked why, and I sort of told her why. I have many reasons, but I don't want to list them all here. But the...
    RopinTexan RopinTexan 22-25, M Dec 6, 2007

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    Feeling Absurd.............

    there are days when i don't recognize myself.........it feels like i m living somebody else's life and just watching myself from distance!!! i watch the tsunami of different emotions rising inside me and i don't even know why i am feeling whatever i am feeling right now...!i wish...
    destinygirl22 destinygirl22 26-30, F Sep 14, 2011

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    vjanee vjanee 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 23

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    TheVirginRapids TheVirginRapids 18-21, F 1 Response May 19

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    This past month has been an emotional

    rollercoaster. Sometimes I'm really happy, and hyper. I can't quit laughing and everything is so wonderful. But here lately it's like I'm slipping again. That depression I thought I had beat, that sinking feeling like I'm walking through quicksand and every time I get close to...
    TheRisingPhoenix TheRisingPhoenix 16-17, F Aug 11

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    Ever since this girl first walked into our

    school for the first time, I couldn't take my eyes off her, and I know I probably wasn't the only one gazing at her beauty. Through my mind I was thinking "you know what, I'm gonna try to talk to her, I need to man up, I need to know how to talk to a girl and here's my first...
    elugo123456789 elugo123456789 18-21, M Apr 4

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    I'm pissed that I'm not

    as empathetic as I want to be. Sometimes I just truly don't are and think people shouldn't dwell on things so much and should just move on and that's ****** up.
    panthrax00 panthrax00 16-17, M 1 Response Aug 11

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    I Wonder

    I wonder if maybe total understanding of me is beyond human comprehention Bah, i'm learning more all the time, maybe it is and maybe it isn't. The next few years will have a lot to say
    AngelaDark AngelaDark 31-35, F 2 Responses Dec 26, 2007

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    My Body Is Here, But My Heart And Mind Are There.

    I moved away from my hometown Mesa, Arizona to Scottsdale Arizona. About 30 minutes away. Mesa is my home. I loved it to death. And being away kills me. I can't let go of Mesa. It's where I wanna be all the time. My thoughts and memories of being there overwhelm me so much, it...
    Thewastedyouth16 Thewastedyouth16 16-17, F 9 Responses Nov 19, 2012

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    Just Keep On Walking Because God's Looking At You

    Some days I just don't understand myself, I wonder what in God's name is going on up there in my head besides the party that goes on up there each and everyday. I look in the mirror and say to myself "My goodness you look sexy today" and then I walk out that door and walk into...
    JimMorrisonRocks JimMorrisonRocks 26-30, M Mar 3, 2013

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    Now Why Did I Do That?

    today i went to george webb's to eat. i ordered a bacon cheeseburger with fries and coffee. my meal was ready in three minutes, ok maybe six. six minutes, i'll say. the fries everything but the bun and the patty was under cooked. i sent the burger back because of the bacon. it...
    pariah pariah 26-30, F 2 Responses Oct 3, 2007

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    Some Guidance. Please

    i think all of us should be delivered to this world with a guide to understanding ourselves. maybe not a book in the size of an encyclopedia or something like that, but a simple pamphlet or anything that delivers the message as clear as it can get. and when you grow up and find...
    madamoiselle madamoiselle 16-18, F 1 Response Aug 20, 2008

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    I dont kno what i feel,

    i kno its strange but i mean like when a friend is sad about something, i dont kno if i actually felt sad like i would understand the pain theyre going thru. I would be there to comfort them and give them advice and let them kno theyre going to be okay. Basically, i dont kno if...
    UniqueBunnii UniqueBunnii 16-17, F May 30

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    More like most of the times.

    Idk either im happy or not. Idk why sometimes i cry and get sad with no reasons. Its not like im not being grateful with my life but i really really hate this town. I want to leave so bad. I want a one way ticket to somewhere calm & not busy. And i like putting myself down. I...
    saffaismail saffaismail 16-17, F 2 Responses Sep 8

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    Sorry, long story... I met a guy about two

    and a half years ago when I was a senior in high school. He was a sophomore in college. Honestly, we met during a time when I was insecure and desperate and we met online. In my defense, trying to find a date was NOT my intention when I found him on the app we met on. Anyway...
    ktelizabeth33 ktelizabeth33 18-21, F Mar 15

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    dying my hair black without permission

    and now i have just realised that the shower in the bathroom is broke so i have to use the bathroom in mums room this should be interesting
    siofrafay siofrafay 13-15, F Jun 22

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    What's the Problem?

    There are several aspects of my life that I know how to take care of them, yet I just don't. For instance- I am bothered by how heavy I have gotten.  While I have always been a larger person, now I am just plain fat.  I know the answer is to eat sensibly, and do a...
    trixiegirl trixiegirl 46-50, F 7 Responses Sep 9, 2009

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    Confused

    Umm, Its kinda shallow, but sometimes I feel all of a sudden that I'm all alone, confused and something inside bothers me without exactly knowing why. I don't know why. I feel like I have to do something important. I try to look for it, for a while... But after sometime looking...
    nikkob nikkob 13-15 Nov 30, 2011

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    Who Am I?

    I have several problems I am trying to work through. It seems that every time I turn around something else is going wrong. I have a great family, two kids and an unbelievable husband. I can't keep myself happy. Lately, I have been attempting to spend money on myself, but as I get...
    anita82883 anita82883 31-35, F 1 Response Nov 26, 2013

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    When did I go from outgoing

    and fun loving to an introverted shut in? I just sort of realized that I have systematically become a boring homebody. I used to be a social butterfly, always out and about, stirring things up, and now I dread the thought of going to parties and meeting new people. Dread! To the...
    Therealabbeyroad Therealabbeyroad 22-25, F Aug 21

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    I get so angry I hate

    that about myself this anger just takes over .. I ask god please take this anger from me .. I notice how I get mad over stupid stuff . I get angry start destroying stuff an putting things in drinks smh something is not right .
    port524 port524 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 20

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    I just remembered something.

    It's so weird, and maybe disgusting? Um, when I was about 7-8, I wrote and illustrated an entire novel. However, it had sexually explicit material...is that bad or…? God, I'm such a weirdo...
    SimplyZero SimplyZero 13-15, F Apr 20

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    Been feeling very lost.

    I am confused about my current relationship...I am afraid to ask for what I need or want...I think I don't know what I want...
    nfred89 nfred89 22-25, F May 24

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    Idk.

    no matter how upset i am, i feel right as rain. i feel happy when i am depressed and depressed when i am happy. i have no control over my mood, and no matter what type of mood stablizers i'm on, i'm never quite okay. lately though, i've found that i am okay.  i will...
    spitrash spitrash 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 28, 2008

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    Tired

    i haven't been sleeping much the past couple day, and last night i tried my best to go to bed early but found myself drifting off to a restless sleep like state at around one and having nightmares the rest of the night. maybe it's because a lot has been on my mind lately. well...
    cindniss cindniss 18-21, F Aug 5, 2013

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    Romance Lost

    I had to work hard to get my girlfriend. I got her by trying (and not being able) to tell her that I love her. She found this romantic, and it really was. And now, at this point, there's just...nothing. I still love her, but I don't understand why I can't keep doing what I was...
    KewlioMZX KewlioMZX 26-30, M Nov 14, 2007

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    I'm Just An Idiot.

    I can't put it into words. It doesn't make sense to anyone. There's just this burning in my chest, this longing. But I don't know what it is that I want so badly. I thought it was a father, but now that I've started talking to him, I'm scared to start loving him. I mean, to...
    TrueBlueKid TrueBlueKid 13-15, F 2 Responses Oct 31, 2013

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    Sometimes I Wish I Was Not Me..

    I am having one of those "I hate myself days." I am doing nothing right. Everytime I think of doing something I am supposed to do, I don't do it. WHY? Why can't I just do what I am supposed to do? I hate that about me! I am stupid and selfish and LAZY! I should be doing...
    SavedByGrace14 SavedByGrace14 22-25, F 1 Response Feb 19, 2008

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    is there anything more frustrating

    than not being able to understand your own intentions? To hear someone say to you, "I'm not sure what you're getting at" and "what is it exactly that you want to happen?" Sometimes I get in these cycles where nothing could satisfy me and seriously I don't want what I want...
    lauren71 lauren71 41-45, F 1 Response Mar 2

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    My emotions be all over the place.

    One minute I'm for sure leavin this guy and the next he show me the side of him that I love and I'm back 2nd guessing myself. Ugh !
    aries1214 aries1214 22-25, F Apr 4

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    my eyes r blue ! why yyyyyy!

    !! i loved my green eyes now there blue help how can i make them go back to green
    siofrafay siofrafay 13-15, F 1 Response Jun 26

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    Why Do I Do The Opposite Of What I Should Do?

    It's strange.  I'll sit and think about a situation for a long, long time and come to a reasonable conclusion.  Then, it will come time to put this conclusion into action and I will do the exact opposite.  I know better.  I just think that I think with my head...
    RichardSimmons RichardSimmons 26-30, M 1 Response Jul 28, 2010

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    I've had so many people come

    and go throughout my life. Whether it's something they did or something I felt I've never had any interest in trying to hold on to them. I've never gone back asking them to forgive or forget or put the past behind us so we could be friends again. I'm 24 now and I've fought for a...
    DarknessWolf DarknessWolf 22-25, M 1 Response Apr 4

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    I'M Upset And Confused

    Why am I such a suck up? I don't understand myself. Why am I doing all I'm doing? And why can't I write down everything? Why is there a clog in my mind that isn't letting me cry or write or express myself in any other way? Why is there this permanent rock inside me? Why am I like...
    prisonbreaktempt prisonbreaktempt 18-21, F Jun 25, 2013

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    I Want To, But I Dont'

    i purposely joined a social co-ed group that gathers about once a month on a saturday night, so i could make friends, never mind 'new' friend, just friends period!!.  I rsvp 'yes' to most events, and half the time, at the last minute i cancel out.  Just because it's too...
    prettyinpink prettyinpink 46-50, F 3 Responses Sep 27, 2008

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    I Want What I Don't Want?

    This mood I've been in lately is very confusing. I don't want anything, and when I say anything, I mean ANYTHING. You could ask me, "Do you want lunch?" I'd say no. "Do you want to skip lunch?" I'd say no. Do I want to go out and make new friends? Do I want to spend time with...
    itsjustme1001 itsjustme1001 22-25, F 4 Responses Jun 13, 2010

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    Lately I've been feeling really depressed.

    .. And the worse part is I know there are people who are experimenting much worse than me, but all that does is make me feel worse about feeling depressed
    musicgurl11 musicgurl11 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 12

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    I have a great life, I life

    as a European in a 'paradise.' however sometimes I just wonder what life is in general, I mean i'm at school talking about a subject to my friend and than 'BAM'; these thoughts come into my head like 'why is this life worth living?' 'Why is society so corrupted?' 'Why are we...
    TheObserverr TheObserverr 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 24

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    Who I Am?

    For the past months, I feel something is not right with myself. As years passed, the understanding of the real 'me' begun to blurred even more. Thanks to special someone who help me realize it. Deep in my heart I know these 17 years, I've been living to please the people around...
    Minyaa Minyaa 16-17 Feb 11, 2013

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    It's just one of those days

    where I ask myself too many questions , seems like I don't have a definite answer to them . I feel confused a lot these days , don't know who I am anymore . I wish to get away somewhere , somewhere far away from all those who know me and all those who I know. Stay alone for some...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Apr 7

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    Related Experiences

    What's with all the anger and hate?
    SLdale SLdale 51-55, M 1 Response 4 days ago

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    True story.#everysingletime
    GrandGizzard GrandGizzard 18-21, M 1 day ago

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    I find myself thinking and dreaming of all the things I could do in this world. The problem is, my mind starts to wonder of all the things that could go wrong. How can I want...
    GetYourFreakOn GetYourFreakOn 16-17, F 1 Response Aug 29

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    Why is it when a woman who was in an abusive relationship gets out and gets with a new guy it's such a struggle. Why has everybody collectively decided I need to go into a nunnery...
    sheloveshim57 sheloveshim57 22-25, F Aug 20

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    I asked her calmly and politely if she could please not leave a bunch of clutter on the kitchen counters. Usually I just ignore it and end up cleaning it all up myself, but I'm...
    noodleloaf noodleloaf 36-40, M 1 Response Aug 28

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    People add me and the friends are like woman with pictures of their bo00ody. And they just add me out of nowhere and I don't even know where did they find me from. And I don't...
    Artz4Life Artz4Life 16-17, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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