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I Don't Understand Myself Sometimes

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,780 People

    I get frustrated for no real reason,

    Even the slightest thing can push me over the edge and get me angry. After anger comes the stage where I just want to cry, And I don't understand it. Hmm.
    EmmasLife EmmasLife 13-15, F Sep 21, 2015

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    I get a new notification signal.

    . Then when I go to see what it is , there's nothing there ..... Happens a lot ... Just happened a minute ago again
    Winston335 Winston335 46-50, M 6 Responses Nov 12, 2014

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    I just figured out a way to kind of explain

    why something's are so hard. the doctors have no idea why I'm alive. I fought back against almost impossible odds. I have what can almost be described as survivors guilt. but not really. I know it's not rational to question why 32 year old woman lived and not an 82 year old man...
    CallmeHopelessNotRomantic CallmeHopelessNotRomantic 36-40, F 4 Responses Oct 3, 2015

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    Yes... and then no...

    . Left.... then right.... High.... then drop to a low. wtf..
    endlessl0ve endlessl0ve 26-30, F 1 Response Sep 25, 2015

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    TheVirginRapids TheVirginRapids 22-25, F May 19, 2014

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    You think it's hard dealing with me?

    Try being the one that's living inside of me. I'm not in therapy, on medication, in counseling and dealing with anxieties just because I'm bored. Some thing is going on inside of me that I don't understand and I project it wrong - anger, hostility, rage, etc. - because it has a...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Dec 20, 2015

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    When I was younger meeting people

    and getting to know them was so much easier because it was fun. Now I'm getting older and I feel like I have a sign on my face that says, "Don't tak to the freak". When we didn't have the Internet things were better.
    YourSecretAdmire22 YourSecretAdmire22 22-25, M 2 Responses Nov 19, 2014

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    Does anyone else start to have feelings

    for someone, get to know that person, and want to be in a relationship with them---but when they finally say they have feelings for you too then you completely lose interest? I just want to know if Im the only one. I don't understand it.
    summershields summershields 22-25, F 2 Responses Feb 22, 2015

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    Im recently separated about 5 months ago.

    . Im happy without my husband, i think its a relief not having him by my side but I feel lonely and incomplete (I don't know why but I'm sure he's not the reason) and I'm tired raising our twins ( love them so much), working longer hours, no vacation, and so many bills to pay!
    tine23 tine23 26-30, F 1 Response Aug 8, 2015

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    My Body Is Here, But My Heart And Mind Are There.

    I moved away from my hometown Mesa, Arizona to Scottsdale Arizona. About 30 minutes away. Mesa is my home. I loved it to death. And being away kills me. I can't let go of Mesa. It's where I wanna be all the time. My thoughts and memories of being there overwhelm me so much, it...
    Thewastedyouth16 Thewastedyouth16 16-17, F 8 Responses Nov 19, 2012

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    Confused

    Umm, Its kinda shallow, but sometimes I feel all of a sudden that I'm all alone, confused and something inside bothers me without exactly knowing why. I don't know why. I feel like I have to do something important. I try to look for it, for a while... But after sometime looking...
    nikkob nikkob 13-15 Nov 30, 2011

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    I have 3 moods 1. Helpful

    and Loving to others 2. Quiet and isolated from everyone 3. Pissed off at everyone who leads normal lives whereas I don't
    kxCobra kxCobra 18-21, F 3 Responses Dec 15, 2014

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    I don't know why I even bothered being there

    for people when they don't even show the slightest bit of appreciation. but instead they kick you out completely without ever questioning your good intentions. sorry I don't deserve such negativity in my life
    Kywen97 Kywen97 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 25, 2015

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    i feel desperate, mad,

    depressed, frustrated.. all of it at once and sometimes i don't even know why. when i'm like this, i get to hurt the ones i love.. and what's weird is that, i actually do not care how bad i can treat them.
    holygoth holygoth 18-21, F Sep 21, 2015

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    Now Why Did I Do That?

    today i went to george webb's to eat. i ordered a bacon cheeseburger with fries and coffee. my meal was ready in three minutes, ok maybe six. six minutes, i'll say. the fries everything but the bun and the patty was under cooked. i sent the burger back because of the bacon. it...
    pariah pariah 26-30, F 2 Responses Oct 3, 2007

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    Hahah no I don't. I always overanalyse

    and overreact and make a drama out of the smallest things and I don't know why the hell I do that. It's just dumb ??
    ifyoureabirdimabird ifyoureabirdimabird 13-15, F Mar 29, 2015

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    My sense of self is fleeting.

    I don’t know who I am. I walk past mirrors and can’t even recognise the person looking back. I find her hideous. I hide away. I wear my hair down to hide my face. I wear long and drooping clothing to hide the rest of me. I try not to take up much space and gravitate to the...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jul 22, 2015

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    As I'm sitting this house wondering what going

    to happen in my later life. As right now I do not understand myself because there so much stuff that I wanted to do. Well I can't do that cause I don't have a car, which I'm still working on saving money. It look like it going to be long time for me to able to get the car. The...
    colonaileen colonaileen 26-30, F Dec 18, 2014

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    Things Girls Do

    OK, so I'd like to share some things I don't understand about the female gender... myself included. If I missed anything, leave me a comment! Also comment if you do any of the things I am about to mention. Self control OK, is it me or do girls have literally no self control? I...
    Dancergirl3 Dancergirl3 16-17 1 Response Sep 14, 2013

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    Sometimes I am not as sensitive

    as I thought, as innocent as and as shy as I used to be. Sometimes I act like a different person subconsciously.
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Nov 2, 2015

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    Feeling Absurd.............

    there are days when i don't recognize myself.........it feels like i m living somebody else's life and just watching myself from distance!!! i watch the tsunami of different emotions rising inside me and i don't even know why i am feeling whatever i am feeling right now...!i wish...
    snuffal snuffal 26-30, F Sep 14, 2011

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    Is Dating/marriage Really Worth It?

    I just had a talk with this girl that's not exactly my girlfriend, but we both really like each other. She asked if I've ever had a girlfriend, and I said no. She asked why, and I sort of told her why. I have many reasons, but I don't want to list them all here. But the...
    RopinTexan RopinTexan 22-25, M Dec 6, 2007

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    Understanding All My Personalities

    Well for a little over a month now I've been able to stay of my medication without any downsides. As of yesterday night I felt a relapse coming on, it's this feeling of having a dark blanket thrown over my being. Basically I felt off last night. All of insecurities came back to...
    EyesOfSeraphim EyesOfSeraphim 26-30, F Jun 23, 2011

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    Parents just fought again.

    Some days I enjoy their fighting and other days like today I just wish they would stop. I'm not sure why I enjoy their fighting. I think part of it may be that whether I don't enjoy it or not, it will still continue to happen so might as well not get all moody over it right? Idk...
    kxCobra kxCobra 18-21, F Dec 13, 2014

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    I guess you could say it's a defense mechanism.

    .. My mind repressed everytime my ex fought with me and emotionally abused me. So it's only fair to think my brain would repress my depression and emotions and keep it all at a dull roar until it explodes. The end result is always the same: I don't understand myself. Or why I...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Dec 13, 2014

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    Why do i keep acting

    so happy? When deep down i'm falling apart. I don't understand why i keep pretending and why i still do.
    DreamingSouls DreamingSouls 16-17, F 1 Response Sep 29, 2014

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    Idk.

    no matter how upset i am, i feel right as rain. i feel happy when i am depressed and depressed when i am happy. i have no control over my mood, and no matter what type of mood stablizers i'm on, i'm never quite okay. lately though, i've found that i am okay.  i will...
    spitrash spitrash 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 28, 2008

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    I'm Just An Idiot.

    I can't put it into words. It doesn't make sense to anyone. There's just this burning in my chest, this longing. But I don't know what it is that I want so badly. I thought it was a father, but now that I've started talking to him, I'm scared to start loving him. I mean, to...
    TrueBlueKid TrueBlueKid 16-17, F 2 Responses Oct 31, 2013

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    I just love how people can just come into your

    life as "the best thing that ever happened to you", and they turn out to be nothing but heartache and grief. And you just keep think to yourself," Why do I even??" But as much as you wanna leave, you cam't, and you feel like a dummy for staying, and you wait, for the day when...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Oct 16, 2015

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    I guess planning is just a way

    for me to get all the excited energy out of my system. That's all chapter summaries are, plans. And I've got more plans for it, but now I don't even want to write it anymore. This always happens and it's really frustrating, but of course not frustrating enough to make me get in...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Sep 22, 2015

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    ^replace "myself" with people I don't get

    why people that are ages 13-15 say that they're 54 or 21 on EP. LIKE WHAT'S THE POINT
    lunaticunicorn lunaticunicorn 13-15, F Jan 19

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    Why is it that I've been told I give great

    advice, I can make a person feel better at the worst of times, yet I don't have the ability to guide myself out of my sadness? I miss my first love. I miss my sister. I feel so lost, like there's no one I can trust
    CindyLEvans CindyLEvans 16-17, F Oct 10, 2015

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    More like most of the times.

    Idk either im happy or not. Idk why sometimes i cry and get sad with no reasons. Its not like im not being grateful with my life but i really really hate this town. I want to leave so bad. I want a one way ticket to somewhere calm & not busy. And i like putting myself down. I...
    flamedoll flamedoll 16-17, F 2 Responses Sep 8, 2014

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    I Want What I Don't Want?

    This mood I've been in lately is very confusing. I don't want anything, and when I say anything, I mean ANYTHING. You could ask me, "Do you want lunch?" I'd say no. "Do you want to skip lunch?" I'd say no. Do I want to go out and make new friends? Do I want to spend time with...
    itsjustme1001 itsjustme1001 22-25, F 4 Responses Jun 13, 2010

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    How is a movie capable of completely destroying

    my mood. Its like i'm so complex i can relate to every character in every movie so their pain becomes my pain. It makes me feel worthless like i don't deserve love and the love i give isn't strong enough. How can a movie make me feel like that. How do i make it stop? Right now i...
    TwystedAbyss TwystedAbyss 18-21, M 2 Responses Jan 28, 2014

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    I'm always so shy. I'd act like something was

    more interesting or act like I'm busy so I don't have to do something simple, like greet friends. I can't even ask the salesperson for help. I can't buy something without thinking that they're judging me. I can't do anything. I hate it. I hate myself.
    kaylemkun kaylemkun 16-17, M Jan 15, 2015

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    Hello to all I'm just wondering you all well

    not all ask something on your profile and I try to help others and yes I be a smat *** to but I will take time answer or just put input in and after all my troubles it pops up this person don't take from people that ain't in my circle so and it's me being me why...
    daddylove4u daddylove4u 51-55, M Oct 19, 2014

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    It's just one of those days

    where I ask myself too many questions , seems like I don't have a definite answer to them . I feel confused a lot these days , don't know who I am anymore . I wish to get away somewhere , somewhere far away from all those who know me and all those who I know. Stay alone for some...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Apr 7, 2014

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    The sound of laughter makes me angry

    but I find everything funny.
    imhim imhim 36-40, M Nov 16, 2014

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    Sometimes I ask myself.

    . "doushite?" Actually, that has got nothing to do with this crap very much. I just finished watching an anime that haven't really got my interest yet. I stopped at half of the story. And that word got stuck in my head. Here I am, outside, looking at the sky, smoking cigarettes...
    DrmrX0001 DrmrX0001 22-25, F 2 Responses Oct 10, 2015

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    aaaaargh!!! roller coaster of emotions again.

    probably my 'daddy issues' rearing their ugly heads. long story short: I'm happy being alone. i love being single. And Yes, I'd love to have that special someone. yes, I get a lot of attention. I'm a female solo artist in a male dominated area so I'm very sought after...
    peepsqueek peepsqueek 31-35, F Mar 8, 2015

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    Contemplating

       How can I know so much yet still want to go against what I know is the best thing to do. How can I know I'm heading for a cliff at 120mph yet still not hit the brakes when I see the edge.Oh yeah I forgot....................... I'm a stupid human.One day I want to do...
    rescue3 rescue3 31-35, M 3 Responses Jan 5, 2010

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    Sometimes I get this pressure in my teeth

    and a pulling feeling like someone is slowly pulling my teeth downwards...the only difference I notice is my teeth feel sharper. Does anyone else experience this. It doesn't usually hurt but can sometimes but only a little bit
    BioWolf1234 BioWolf1234 16-17, M Sep 19, 2015

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    I've had so many people come

    and go throughout my life. Whether it's something they did or something I felt I've never had any interest in trying to hold on to them. I've never gone back asking them to forgive or forget or put the past behind us so we could be friends again. I'm 24 now and I've fought for a...
    DarknessWolf DarknessWolf 26-30, M 1 Response Apr 4, 2014

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