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I Don't Want Sex With My Spouse

This group was created because "Living in a Sexless Marriage" involves two types of people: Refusers and Refusees. This group if for those of us who either unwillingly go along with or refuse sex. 22 People

    ...because I Want To Be More Than An object.

    It's been quite awhile since my husband and I actually connected on an emotional level. He's been pushing me away for more than 5yrs now, but is easy on the eyes and is good in bed (even if my libido does tend to run higher than his) I greet him when he comes home, and he wants...
    ViolaPercy ViolaPercy
    26-30, F
    Nov 19, 2009

    I like sex with my husband, but others are fun too.

    Selected portions that were adapted from my husband's computer diary, rewritten by me: Our family is a bit complicated. Five years after I married Jennifer, her younger brother Alan married my younger sister Helen – who is actually two and half years older than Alan. Our...
    sarawks sarawks
    26-30, F
    1 Response Nov 16, 2008

    Help, Before It's Too Late.

    I am newly married - four months. And I see the danger coming. I avoid sex with my husband. I don't know how to remedy it. We both have children, but my daughter, who lives with us (his son does not), takes an incredible amount of energy. I just feel totally drained most of the...
    kazure kazure
    26-30, F
    4 Responses Sep 24, 2009

    Is It That Time of Year Already?

    I give up.  Granted, my wife is the mother of my beautiful kids, but, her desire to be physically attractive to me, herself, or others went out the window immediately after the birth of our first.  After ten long years of her being turned off by sex, I give up. I...
    legsman legsman
    41-45, M
    1 Response May 9, 2009

    Turned Off

    My husband is fed up with me. I no longer have the desire to have sex with him. I feel awful about it, but what do I do...just lay there and suffer through it? Then it hurts the whole next day. Our relationship has been going downhill emotionally for awhile now, and with that...
    soonergalstef soonergalstef
    36-40, F
    1 Response Jul 7, 2011

    Conflicting Reactions

    One thing I find really interesting and ironic is that my fantasy men do and say things to me and I like it.  My husband does the same things in real life and it annoys the hell out of me.  Like in my fantasy, I'm in the kitchen and Fantasy Man will come up behind...
    doorsinmymind doorsinmymind
    41-45, F
    1 Response May 22, 2008

    Strange Urge?

        Hada kinda strange thing happen last nite.  I was out with some friends  (amazing but true) and one friend, who I have felt a bit attracted to sometimes, put his arm around my shoulder.  I was telling him I have'nt been feeling well (finally...
    AyeAye AyeAye
    46-50, F
    7 Responses Mar 26, 2008

    Shared This 1st On Iliasm Group

      I came to this site today for the first time ever seeking to find some insight on my husband’s feelings and hoping for stories of triumph from people like me who really desire healthy, happy marriages. Instead however, I have only found threads of….lynch mobs...
    Hoping4theBest Hoping4theBest
    22-25, F
    1 Response Nov 7, 2009

    Kinda Embarrassing, Is'nt It?

         I'm not sure exactly where to begin...... I married late.  To a much older man.  I've always had a lot of sexual "issues"  like a really low libido, and lots of shame.  The shame came from my upbringing, general fear, lack of...
    AyeAye AyeAye
    46-50, F
    1 Response Mar 26, 2008

    Leaving the Group

    I am leaving this group because my divorce became official today.  I used to think that I didn't want sex and that my body had just shut down over time. I now realize that my body still works (and how) and that it was my brain that had shut down.  I did not love my...
    doorsinmymind doorsinmymind
    41-45, F
    1 Response Apr 11, 2009

    Just Shared This Story On Iliasm As Well...

    H e'd been pushing me away emotionally for about 5yrs, then finally after a "warm-up" oral about a month and a half ago, he decided he didn't want to continue because he was "not feeling emotionally connected" to me. Leaving me hot & bothered &...
    ViolaPercy ViolaPercy
    26-30, F
    1 Response Nov 23, 2009

    Great Idea

    I was blown away when I came across this group. Finally a place for Refusers! By all rights WE should have a place in the mainstream sexless marriage discussion groups both here and elsewhere on the internet. But if you have signed up for these groups, then told your story- the...
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Dec 18, 2008
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