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I Don't Want to Be Me Anymore

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 553 People

    I Can't Escape Her.

    I am 8 years old all over again. Wandering around the playground, drawing stick figures on the blacktop, Never looking up, for fear that that might be the moment I realize how invisible I am. In the midst of so many other kids my age, Screaming, laughing, hopscotching, Swinging...
    tastedtherain tastedtherain 26-30, F Mar 22, 2013

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    Me.I

    I don't even know,I'm not sure what to write here. I've been battling self conflict my whole life. I'm a mess, I'm alone. And I want to escape my brain, I want to escape me.
    Fairlyismagic Fairlyismagic 16-17, F 2 Responses Jan 27, 2013

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    i don't want to be me,

    i don't like myself, every time i look in the mirror i see someone who i don't want to see. i don't want to hear the voices in my head any more i just really don't want to be me
    makeitsomeday makeitsomeday 18-21, F Mar 6

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    I'm not pretty, no one notices me,

    no one cares so what's the point of me being around? I wish people liked me I try so hard to be friendly and a good person. Just for a day I want to be some gorgeous woman
    SeanaO SeanaO 18-21, F 8 Responses Apr 27, 2014

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    Yeah

    I can relate to this group, but it also reminded me of some lyrics. I bash myself to sleep What you sow I will reap I scar myself you see I wish I wasn't me I am the little stick You stir me into **** I hate therefore I am ******* your righteous hand I think it's appropriate.
    LordNothing LordNothing 26-30, M Nov 2, 2011

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    I'm an actual Mess...

    ..... so I've 6 months off for college where we have to do work experience. It's getting closer and closer and I'm not organised. The reason is because I want to do something adventuristic by going abroad because most of my fellow classmates are... but there's something pulling...
    BeeKay20 BeeKay20 18-21, F May 12

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    I'm just sick to death of my whole existence.

    I feel so good one minute and then I feel like I want to jump off a bridge the next. I'm back on my meds and it feels worse. I just can't handle the high peaks and deep valleys. I don't like to leave depressing posts but while the world sees me doing the daily grind the inner me...
    SRayne SRayne 51-55, M 5 Responses Nov 4, 2014

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    God Looked At Me And Said, "Ah To Hell With This One".

    Well my Mum kept getting ill when i was young because she stopped eating. She was desperate for attention from my father. My father was cheating on her. Then she died and my dad abandoned me. I grew up getting into alot of fights and problems at school. Im shy, i dont like...
    1 Response Feb 1, 2013

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    Just Gotta Be Better

    I know I can do better if I can just start over. Let me die and come back knowing just a little of what I've lived and I will go a different route and come out way ahead.
    mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality 36-40, F 2 Responses Jul 20, 2008

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    I can't stand how critical I am of myself.

    I can't stand how hard I push myself, and how terrified of failure I am. I can't stand how I can't see beyond the short term misery. I am tired of myself.
    mrosel mrosel 18-21, F 1 Response May 8, 2014

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    The Letter.

    this is a letter i want to send a really good person that i care about a lot and that is really close to me but there is a very big thing thats holding us apart. your the first person i think of to come to wheni dont get something going on in my head, i know that you wont judge...
    betty0the0boop betty0the0boop 66-70, F 5 Responses May 26, 2010

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    Yleng Yleng 26-30, F 2 Responses Nov 3, 2014

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    I Can't Escape From Myself

    I completely hear what you guys are saying here. I think I spend way too much time comparing myself with or fantasizing that I am another person, or whoever the particular person is that I'm thinking of.  I've done this for as long as I remember. I just know that I would...
    wedneschild wedneschild 36-40 4 Responses Dec 16, 2008

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    I hate being alive. I hate

    who I am and the things I do. I'm vain and shellfish. I've been told so by all those closest to me. I feel it, so it must be true. I went to a psychiatrist who told me I have PTSD... I don't really know what to do with that. My first response was 'no sh**, you don't f****** say...
    Pixiemist Pixiemist 26-30, F Dec 12, 2013

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    I just don't fit anywhere.

    I don't believe I ever have. Growing up I was always picked on. I always said the wrong thing or acted the wrong way. Even in the military I felt like an outcast in my own platoon. Everyone who comes into my life leaves for one reason or another. I have no friends. I live alone...
    justanotherguy86 justanotherguy86 26-30, M 1 Response Dec 14, 2014

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    Why Can'T I Be Someone Else?

    Why can't I be someone else? Someone who doesn't get into trouble Someone who doesn't get involved in fights Someone who doesn't have to pretend that she's fine Someone who doesn't pretend to be happy Someone who doesn't hide her fears,and pains Someone who can be able to show...
    ScaredFlower ScaredFlower 16-17, F 2 Responses Jan 30, 2013

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    Autumn02 Autumn02 13-15, F 2 Responses May 11

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    Labels

    Autism, OCD, ADHD, Aspergers, Infertility, Balanced Translocation, Depression, PCOS, Endometriosis. Inside my head everything is confused. Imagine being a passenger on a train which is going too fast and could lose control. I can see every twist but can do nothing to slow down...
    raebabe1981 raebabe1981 31-35, F Oct 16, 2013

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    A Long, Hard Road.

    Ever since I can remember I've been an outcast. In school I was the kid that everyone picked on because they could get away with it. I've never been the type to stand up for myself. Or, if I did stand up for myself, I only made things worse. When I was thirteen my sister...
    Ashtyn Ashtyn 26-30, M 5 Responses Apr 10, 2010

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    Hate The Person I Am Since Husbands Affair

    i don want to me any more, not the me i am since his affair i used to be confident and felt good about me, since my attempted suicide due to the affair and the following verbal and physical abuse i am now self loathing insecure nervous and doubt myself i hate me my body and...
    browneyedgirl1965 browneyedgirl1965 41-45, F 2 Responses Jan 11, 2010

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    I don't want to be me anymore.

    I'm a good person, who always tries hard to be nice to everyone. But I grew up in a different world, where people interact differently. Plus my mother has borderline personality disorder, so as a child of a borderline I relate to people differently, as well as having...
    olasucks olasucks 41-45, F 1 Response May 7, 2014

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    Behind A Curtain Of What They Think Is Normal.

    I've lost the reason for life, and all I can see is people pretending that there is a physical goal to this maze we run for a century. Ok maybe that was strong for my first sentence, so let me start over. I'm 19, online I go by shadeofaman, a name that I adopted for a number of...
    Shadeofaman Shadeofaman 22-25, M Apr 17, 2013

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    I Really Don't.

    I'd like to be someone who has their sh*t together...Someone smart, capable, and confident. Someone beautiful, someone who can think fast and work brilliantly under pressure. Someone who can have kids. Someone lovable. Someone with a healthy past. Someone who knows how to let the...
    SpiritOfTheRabbit SpiritOfTheRabbit 31-35, F 4 Responses Nov 3, 2011

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    I don't think there was ever a time in

    which I wanted to be me..
    PendulEmPlum PendulEmPlum 18-21, F 1 Response May 12

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    I was sexually abused

    for years when I was younger. I suffered from severe, suicidal depression when I was at school. I was sexually assaulted by some guys I thought were my friends at college. I hate my body. I hate my awkward, annoying personality. I am living my dream and yet I still don't want to...
    PlayingARole PlayingARole 22-25, F 1 Response Feb 14

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    Recently, I've been trying new things,

    things maybe a thirteen year old shouldn't be doing yet. Such as makeup, hair color, and hairstyles, but it depends on the opinion ya know? Anyways, I've been trying everything to change me from who I really am. I personally think I'm not a pretty girl in any way, and I just...
    meiralaurel meiralaurel 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 17, 2014

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    Nobody To Talk To

    Think I'm having a nervous breakdown. This happens way too much to not say anything anymore but I literally have nobody I can talk to about it. Really just wish the world would end so I didn't have to try anymore. I don't want to be myself, wish I was someone else that was happy...
    Lizzyloopin Lizzyloopin 18-21 3 Responses Nov 12, 2012

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    i wish i could erase myself

    so i dont have to feel this kind of pain again
    Gina1993 Gina1993 18-21, F 3 Responses May 12

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    I Am No-One.

    wanting to be someone. but i can't find my way... i'm lost in anxieties.
    kushieface kushieface 22-25, F May 6, 2013

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    I Want To Be More Like My Friends

    I haven't had anything traumatic in my life. I don't understand why i should be like this. I'm 19 and i spend any of my time i'm not at college in my room. Either on old game systems or on the computer. When i left school i left with 1 friend, he's my closest friend in the world...
    lillyth616 lillyth616 18-21 May 4, 2012

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    When I'm trying to type a nice good bye story

    but I'm crashing hard so it's going to be short. I'm over the past haunting me bye
    Ripjr Ripjr 18-21, M May 12

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    I Just Get Sick Of Being Me

    Sometimes I just don't want to be me anymore and I want to change everything about myself but I cant I want to be brave not the biggest chicken in the world I want to be smart so dumb and so ditsy I want to be strong physically not just emotionally I want to be outgoing and not...
    willieverbegoodenough willieverbegoodenough 22-25, F 1 Response Sep 21, 2013

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    There is nothing wrong with me

    that I can tell. I'm a normal social teen with a good group of friends. I'm decently attractive. But no matter what I do I am a failure. It feels like I'm given a ton of pieces but just can't put them together. I get signs from girls that they're into me but I just can't pull it...
    imjustgonnausethisonce1 imjustgonnausethisonce1 16-17, M Feb 14, 2014

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    my story starts at the tender age of five.

    I know i was young, I suppose that is one of the reasons i became a master at hiding my emotions. My mask was and if i want it to be still is impenetrable, its imposable for someone to see through it.by the time i was eight i was no longer a happy child i had learnt the hard way...
    reie1 reie1 16-17, F 2 Responses Dec 5, 2013

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    Failure.

    I hate being me. I fail why I try to do things I like. I hate my figure. I hate my smile. I hate how I can't look into the mirror and smile. I hate the feeling when you let somebody down. People have unrealistically high assumptions of me. I'm not innocent anymore. I can't handle...
    LunaViolet LunaViolet 13-15, F Jan 18, 2013

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    I Regret Every Choice I've Ever Made In My Life.

    I want to start over, with a new life, new personality, new everything. The choices I have made as a person are regretful and illogically irresponsible. I'm socially awkward and am either too loud or too quiet. I don't want to live anymore in the world I've created for myself...
    CrashingDown CrashingDown 16-17 2 Responses Jul 21, 2011

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    The thing you have to understand about me is

    that I am a deeply unhappy person.
    Madison18 Madison18 18-21, F 3 Responses Apr 12

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    I Want To Change

    I am a 13 year old boy and I want to be different because I Love maths, I am one of the smartest kids in school I have braces and glasses and I have 2 friends. I only have 2 because all the friends I used to have which was allot, I found out have been talking about me behind my...
    mainguner0918 mainguner0918 13-15 9 Responses Feb 25, 2012

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    I'm so sick of being alive now.

    Too scared to kill myself, too tired to keep going. I cut till I bleed and I don't have to feel anymore. I just want this life to be over. I won't be missed. The man I was going to marry has left me. My friends are all gone. My family has never cared. I just want this to be...
    Latekin Latekin 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 5, 2014

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    i cant anymore i hate being me,

    i am so stupid and dumb i cant talk and nobody listens to me and i just hate it i wish i was beyonce
    Angel861 Angel861 13-15 1 Response May 12

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    I Hate Being Me.

    I'm twenty-five years old. I've suffered from depression since I was a child, and I've always felt like I had no right to feel so upset all the time. My life was not traumatic. I didn't experience anything that would justify feeling the things that I feel. But because of my...
    CJShel CJShel 26-30, F 2 Responses Jul 3, 2013

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