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I Drink to Numb Myself

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 83 People

    But That Takes A Lot

    I added this experience a while ago and never added the story until now. Since then I've changed my drinking habits a bit. I used to drink to numb myself. I found the pain was so strong, though, that it took an unbelieveably large amount of alcohol to get sufficiently numb. I...
    accomplice accomplice 41-45, M 4 Responses Jan 11, 2011

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    151 Bacardi Street

    im not too pleased with my life so i hit this dive bar frequently. i always shoot 151 straight when i go their. One day a buddy came in and wanted to do a shot of whatever i was having so he did 2 shots of 151 with me. Well i did 6 and played some pool. After the game he was...
    rorer714 rorer714 26-30, M Jan 28, 2013

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    It helps dull the pain

    and numbs the feeling of lose
    Sufferedloss Sufferedloss 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 23, 2014

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    Tears of a Punk...

    When I drink, it's usually alone and usually because I can't handle how badly my life feels all the time. If I go out and drink with friends I usually end up crying, which is probably why nobody will drink with me anymore. That of course only makes me feel worse about my life. It...
    SadLittlePunk SadLittlePunk 31-35 2 Responses Dec 6, 2008

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    Good Or Bad Feelings, I Just Want To Be Numb

    I drink regardless if my life is going incredibly well or if it's just horrible. I'm so used to being numb that any bit of extreme emotion is just too much for me. I will admit that I do like to drink, period and it's not just solely to be numb, but it's a huge part of it. I don...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Apr 1, 2013

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    I hate the feeling of being drunk,

    it's absolutely terrible. However, periodically... such as today; a flood of emotions gnawed away at my heart causing such pain and loneliness, this was a time for me to have a glass of wine and be done with the hurt. Perhaps, if I were in happier circumstances this "self...
    PlasticRobot PlasticRobot 36-40, F Dec 12, 2014

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    Comfortably Numb

    When I drink… If I’m careful, I can lose myself in the spinning. In the weightlessness of unconscious. I can float, away from everything. Forget for a while. It’s a fine line. To not let the disconnect allow me to think about the things that I don’t...
    onceandfutureglow onceandfutureglow 31-35, F 8 Responses Jul 27, 2010

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    There Is Something Missing

    During my college years, I drank primarily for my enjoyment. Over the past year or so, I have found that I have used alcohol as a means of comforting myself. I know that I have a pretty good life, so I am not entirely sure why I need comforting. I have a feeling that there is...
    EvenFlow85 EvenFlow85 26-30, M 1 Response Mar 10, 2011

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    It's Part Of My Life But Doesn't Rule My Life

    I have been drinking alcohol almost everyday since i was 14 yrs old, i am now 34.I am not a true alcoholic in the sense that yes i do go to work all day ,and can actually go days, weeks or months without alcohol. i just choose NOT to go without. :)
    daro76 daro76 31-35, F 2 Responses Jun 16, 2011

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    Yes, I Do...

    The first time I got drunk was when I was 19. I had so much confidence and my shyness was gone. Once I turned 20, I drank because I was irritated. Now, (since 21) I drink because I hate my life and have nothing going for me. I use dark humor and drinking to hide the deep pain...
    LovelessDeluxe LovelessDeluxe 22-25 4 Responses Feb 28, 2011

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    I'd Like To

    I don't drink a lot but I wish I could drink to numb myself from the pain of being lonely. If I had the chance I would drink 24/7. It seems like things that happen good in my life always come to an end eventually. I'm just exausted with it happening. I just want to be able...
    tngurl25 tngurl25 26-30, F 3 Responses Dec 11, 2011

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    Oh No!

    i'm afraid this may become extreme alcoholism. and i don't think i can stop it.
    gypsysoul gypsysoul 22-25, F 1 Response Jun 29, 2007

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    I drink to numb myself.

    Because I feel pain. Drinking just numbs the pain a little. It still hurts, but it hurts a little less. I am alone, but when I drink, it matters less. I want to flee. I want to escape. I don't want to see or feel what I see or feel. I want to disconnect from my feelings. When I...
    RichardAndon RichardAndon 22-25, M 1 Response Jul 18, 2014

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    Wish It Lasted Longer

    When I don't want to cut but I need to cut, I drink. It calms things down and the anxiety fades. I just wish it was not a short term solution. If I cant make the anxiety go away, I can numb it at least.
    empleh empleh 26-30 Sep 10, 2010

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    Use to

    That had to be the hardest thing in the world to do! I had to learn how to love me for me again!
    Mammy Mammy 36-40, F Mar 26, 2008

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    I Have Recently

    been told that i was an alcoholic a few months back. i never thought my drinkin was serious. But turns out i was wrong. I still feel the need for drink but the lack of money stops me although every penny i get i usually save up for alcohol. It doesn't scare me...i just don't want...
    xXmissyXx xXmissyXx 16-18, F 2 Responses Aug 12, 2007

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    Related Experiences

    What is it like to feel? For weeks I've been trying to get myself back from the anger, resentment, and depression I feel inside. But no matter what I do I still feel just numb and...
    blackskys blackskys 22-25, F 1 day ago

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    Finding an inspiration that heals. Shes gone. It hurts but I will be okay. This past year has been phenomenally hard but I believe I'm exactly where I need to be. 2014 I was...
    mmn6134 mmn6134 22-25, F Feb 5

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    I am not an alcoholic, or a really regular drinker. Just on occasions in social situations where we go out with friends etc. I hadn't drank in weeks (even though I tend bar as a...
    ceridwen610 ceridwen610 51-55, F 4 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    We rent out a couple of rooms in our house to make a little extra money, yesterday I thought I had the place to myself so I was wearing a bra and panties and just a dressing gown...
    LibbyLee LibbyLee 56-60, T 3 Responses 1 hr ago

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    I have a drink problem. I know I do. I can't tell anyone yet so this is my first attempt at admitting it. I can't keep myself away from the people I drink with. I can't hold down...
    SolitaryOyster SolitaryOyster 22-25 Feb 8

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    BEWARE!! I am about to write the most personal and sucky story ever. I just need to get it out since no one will talk to me anymore. On Wensday, my "friend" Cam had a party to...
    QuinnMac12 QuinnMac12 13-15, F Jan 30

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    I'd been feeling so sick all day that I decided to make myself vomit. I went to the toilet and started trying to burp up the vomit but it didn't work so I had to finger my throat...
    pukeboy pukeboy 22-25, M 1 Response Feb 6

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    I've been dehydrated my whole life. My body doesn't tell me I need to drink until my mouth is so dry it's difficult to taste. I'm pretty sure my body fails to release whatever the...
    Twichl Twichl 18-21, F Jan 27

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    I don't hate myself for the way I look anymore ... I hate myself for the person I am ... I realize how ******* awful I am to everybody!! I'm just so mean to people all the time and...
    suicidalblonde suicidalblonde 13-15, F 1 Response Feb 15

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    Hey guys. I wrote this as a letter ill never send. let me know what you think? I stopped writing for a while, mostly because, well, I wanted to block out how I had been feeling...
    abbylynn98 abbylynn98 18-21, F 4 Responses Jan 28

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    The games..that once cleared my head from worries.. that took me away..just for those few moment..from all of this mayhem, fades away. Temptation is back. I hate it.. this reality...
    CursedPaladin CursedPaladin 18-21, M Feb 2

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    My house was wrecked, the storm was over... I hated myself from allowing it to happen.  It was too much that I can bear, I went catatonic.Yet, I managed to walk past the...
    4BlackForest 4BlackForest 36-40, F 6 Responses Feb 15

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    I've only just noticed but I'm getting chubbier.. I've been on the verge of chubby for a long time but recently I've been eating more (especially chips, chocolate, snacks) and I've...
    Cat903 Cat903 26-30, F 2 Responses Jan 29

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    Drinking is the only thing that makes me happy, Getting smashed when you have problems seems to make you feel better that's why I drank myself to sleep yesterday, I mixed alcohol...
    SunshineAnderson13 SunshineAnderson13 22-25, F Feb 10

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    1. I live in London 2. Originally from New York 3. My favourite band is Babes in Toyland (I'm seeing them live in London!) 4. I love Asian food 5. I love to travel, booked a trip...
    Fierrrrce Fierrrrce 18-21, F Feb 15

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    I quit drinking soda Five years ago. not 'cause of calories or anything. One morning my father decided to go on a diet and I was like "Well ima give something up too for...
    Mewl Mewl 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 18

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    It's a struggle, but I know inner peace comes from it. Perhaps I'll never be 'happy.' I think I can be okay with that, as I have lost something that was so dear to me, but perhaps...
    WingsofTime WingsofTime 22-25, F 1 Response a week ago

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    "I hate my own reflection, question every choice I make" I hate everything about myself. I really do try tho. I try to find good things. But I never can. Not in my personality...
    shhyoudontknowme shhyoudontknowme 16-17, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    i always i say dont want to drink and my friends would say that we should drink . but then i end up drinking most of the beer.once i start i would like to keep going.im a fast beer...
    voyagetoheaven voyagetoheaven 18-21, M Jan 30

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    Today I observed myself talking to my fiancée on Skype. I noticed I didn't commit myself 100% to loving her, but rather around 65%. The other 35% was loving me. Feeling the sorrow...
    cloudsoflife cloudsoflife 26-30, M 3 Responses Feb 3

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    I was fine all day, yet as i was in bed on tumblr, I came across a love blog. And after about 10 minutes of scrolling, I found myself sobbing into my teddy bear. The reason, this...
    MiniMe57 MiniMe57 13-15, F Feb 7

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    Hence the name change. It only takes me once to learn my lesson. I've had enough life experiences that I can adjust myself accordingly. I am very grateful for resilience. It is...
    LanaKane101 LanaKane101 31-35, F 1 Response Feb 7

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    I'm afraid I might die once I quit drinking. Just read this and heard stories of people dying after they had stop alcohol consumption :( A friend has challenged me that I can't go...
    Spiritm Spiritm 31-35, M Feb 11

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    I go about my days dazed, entranced. Sometimes, I feel I am hollow or empty, but the pain is there. The pain is always there. It's just a matter of sweeping it under the worn rug...
    WingsofTime WingsofTime 22-25, F 1 Response Feb 12

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    I like to drink water water water water water water water haha.... I bearly drink juice or milk. I do drink sprite in the morning when I'm eating. I like to Eat a lot I drink...
    lorrena19 lorrena19 18-21, F Feb 13

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    my fav drinkzzzzzzzzzzzCoca colaPepsiMountain dew i like to call it doyep mountain do hahapeople who drink might be wonderingwhat i drinki drink water other then above hahatea with...
    Devilangle Devilangle 18-21, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    1. I'm a mother 2. I'm so petite that when I'm out with my son, people give me the 'oh look, there goes another teen mum' look 3. I've never smoked 4. I've never taken illegal...
    bethany1990 bethany1990 22-25, T Feb 9

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    I lost myself while loving a man too hard. I wish I knew before it happened. if I knew this was all going to be game to him I would've gave half of me or ended. Now my heart is...
    candij1983 candij1983 31-35, F 1 Response Feb 9

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    Well almost. Ive came really close this yr haha i usually forget to go in the morning because im so tired and as the day goes on my water pills start to kick in and i drink water...
    musiclover556 musiclover556 18-21, T 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I was filling up my car a little while ago and the numbers were BOTH even! Haha, this is the first. Sorry, but I'm OCD (about a lot of things) when it comes to numbers!
    lizygurl lizygurl 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 11

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    After winning every battle I have lost the war. With every single issue in my life I bottle it up and put on smile and say I'm fine. That's a lie for so many years I was sad and...
    sophilla sophilla 13-15, F 4 days ago