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I Drink to Numb Myself

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 84 People

    I'd Like To

    I don't drink a lot but I wish I could drink to numb myself from the pain of being lonely. If I had the chance I would drink 24/7. It seems like things that happen good in my life always come to an end eventually. I'm just exausted with it happening. I just want to be able...
    tngurl25 tngurl25 26-30, F 3 Responses Dec 11, 2011

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    I Have Recently

    been told that i was an alcoholic a few months back. i never thought my drinkin was serious. But turns out i was wrong. I still feel the need for drink but the lack of money stops me although every penny i get i usually save up for alcohol. It doesn't scare me...i just don't want...
    xXmissyXx xXmissyXx 16-18, F 2 Responses Aug 12, 2007

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    There Is Something Missing

    During my college years, I drank primarily for my enjoyment. Over the past year or so, I have found that I have used alcohol as a means of comforting myself. I know that I have a pretty good life, so I am not entirely sure why I need comforting. I have a feeling that there is...
    EvenFlow85 EvenFlow85 26-30, M 1 Response Mar 10, 2011

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    Use to

    That had to be the hardest thing in the world to do! I had to learn how to love me for me again!
    Mammy Mammy 36-40, F Mar 26, 2008

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    It's Part Of My Life But Doesn't Rule My Life

    I have been drinking alcohol almost everyday since i was 14 yrs old, i am now 34.I am not a true alcoholic in the sense that yes i do go to work all day ,and can actually go days, weeks or months without alcohol. i just choose NOT to go without. :)
    daro76 daro76 31-35, F 2 Responses Jun 16, 2011

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    Oh No!

    i'm afraid this may become extreme alcoholism. and i don't think i can stop it.
    gypsysoul gypsysoul 22-25, F 1 Response Jun 29, 2007

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    I hate the feeling of being drunk,

    it's absolutely terrible. However, periodically... such as today; a flood of emotions gnawed away at my heart causing such pain and loneliness, this was a time for me to have a glass of wine and be done with the hurt. Perhaps, if I were in happier circumstances this "self...
    PlasticRobot PlasticRobot 36-40, F Dec 12

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    151 Bacardi Street

    im not too pleased with my life so i hit this dive bar frequently. i always shoot 151 straight when i go their. One day a buddy came in and wanted to do a shot of whatever i was having so he did 2 shots of 151 with me. Well i did 6 and played some pool. After the game he was...
    rorer714 rorer714 26-30, M Jan 28, 2013

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    Yes, I Do...

    The first time I got drunk was when I was 19. I had so much confidence and my shyness was gone. Once I turned 20, I drank because I was irritated. Now, (since 21) I drink because I hate my life and have nothing going for me. I use dark humor and drinking to hide the deep pain...
    LovelessDeluxe LovelessDeluxe 22-25 4 Responses Feb 28, 2011

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    Wish It Lasted Longer

    When I don't want to cut but I need to cut, I drink. It calms things down and the anxiety fades. I just wish it was not a short term solution. If I cant make the anxiety go away, I can numb it at least.
    empleh empleh 26-30 Sep 10, 2010

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    It helps dull the pain

    and numbs the feeling of lose
    Sufferedloss Sufferedloss 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 23

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    Good Or Bad Feelings, I Just Want To Be Numb

    I drink regardless if my life is going incredibly well or if it's just horrible. I'm so used to being numb that any bit of extreme emotion is just too much for me. I will admit that I do like to drink, period and it's not just solely to be numb, but it's a huge part of it. I don...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Apr 1, 2013

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    I drink to numb myself.

    Because I feel pain. Drinking just numbs the pain a little. It still hurts, but it hurts a little less. I am alone, but when I drink, it matters less. I want to flee. I want to escape. I don't want to see or feel what I see or feel. I want to disconnect from my feelings. When I...
    RichardAndon RichardAndon 22-25, M 1 Response Jul 18

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    Comfortably Numb

    When I drink… If I’m careful, I can lose myself in the spinning. In the weightlessness of unconscious. I can float, away from everything. Forget for a while. It’s a fine line. To not let the disconnect allow me to think about the things that I don’t...
    onceandfutureglow onceandfutureglow 31-35, F 8 Responses Jul 27, 2010

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    Tears of a Punk...

    When I drink, it's usually alone and usually because I can't handle how badly my life feels all the time. If I go out and drink with friends I usually end up crying, which is probably why nobody will drink with me anymore. That of course only makes me feel worse about my life. It...
    SadLittlePunk SadLittlePunk 31-35 2 Responses Dec 6, 2008

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    But That Takes A Lot

    I added this experience a while ago and never added the story until now. Since then I've changed my drinking habits a bit. I used to drink to numb myself. I found the pain was so strong, though, that it took an unbelieveably large amount of alcohol to get sufficiently numb. I...
    accomplice accomplice 41-45, M 4 Responses Jan 11, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    It's been a while since I had *the thirst,* almost 20 years. Not just thirsty. The real HUNGER for a drink. The type of need for a drink that makes your skin itch and crawl...
    Saylowman Saylowman 46-50, M 5 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    I'm falling apart. I had a bad childhood which I got through. I thought I was strong. I told myself I'd never do.. it. I'm doing it... I'm so disappointed but I'm numb. I bottled...
    WeCouldBeDead WeCouldBeDead 16-17, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    After regularly binge drinking myself into an alcoholic oblivion for 22 years, and with my 40th birthday approaching, I decided to abstain from it completely and permanently, as...
    anothernightowl anothernightowl 36-40, M 9 Responses Dec 2

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    Sooo... I am afraid I'm drinking too much to numb the pain from a chronic health problem.
    JD3108 JD3108 22-25, F a week ago

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    Honestly, I tend to embarrass myself on a daily basis. whether it's intentional or unintentional. and I don't really care! Cause I am who I am, and I love who I am, and I'm not...
    MeowOnMe MeowOnMe 18-21, F 1 Response 5 hrs ago

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    My father had a drinking problem. I always thought that I was a strong person, but lately I find myself more than willing to drink in overwhelming situations and that makes me...
    shadowgirl4 shadowgirl4 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 27

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    And that was over 25 years ago. I knew I was loosing control over my drinking and decided to do something about it. A couple fo weeks before Labor Day, I decided I would quit...
    AlbertSAT AlbertSAT 66-70, M 6 Responses Nov 21

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    I told my friends back home I drank for the first time with some people from my platoon and they were a little hurt because I always said no to drinking with them. SO on New Year...
    wildcard64 wildcard64 22-25, M 3 Responses Dec 9

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    I hate that I keep trying to keep our relationship going when he doesn't even want to be with me :( I'm tired of forcing this. I hate myself..it's all my fault :'( I wish I could...
    Rdelat Rdelat 18-21, F 6 hrs ago

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    I haven't let myself feel anything for the last 7 years. Sure, I've put on the appropriate faces for the right occassion. Grief, forced happiness, sadness...tonight I don't know...
    MsInked511 MsInked511 26-30, F 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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    Plz someone I just want a buddy who would actually help me and lead me to my goal in no time advice me what to eat drink or what not to eat or drink I would do anything I would...
    Thin1997 Thin1997 16-17, F 4 Responses Nov 24

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    11:11~ The Synchronistic Meaning Behind This Master Number Sequence. Angels and Spirit guides communicate their love and guidance in many ways. For many people, number sequences...
    Sjenka Sjenka 36-40, F 2 Responses Dec 12

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    Every time I make any kind of mistake- even just getting a bad grade on a test or saying something stupid- I feel like I deserve to be punished for it by hurting myself. I cut my...
    kaleidoscopic21 kaleidoscopic21 13-15, F 5 Responses 4 days ago

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    I HATE MYSELF, SO YEAH... I WANT TO BE NOTHING BECAUSE THIS IS HOW I AM TREATED... THANK YOU GOD FOR THIS BLOOD THAT I AM ABOUT TO SACRIFICE IN THE NAME OF BEAUTY! A DRINK TO...
    ONESTARRYSTARRYNIGHT ONESTARRYSTARRYNIGHT 26-30, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    Today I received a letter from my dad who has been incarcerated since April. This is the first letter he has sent me. I have not seen him due to circumstances in the family that...
    Aml4 Aml4 22-25, F 3 Responses Nov 28

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    I have changed my number so my stupid professor can't be able to communicate with me anymore.  I can't tell if I'm happy that I did that because I will be able to check A7mad's...
    unknown159231 unknown159231 18-21, F Nov 22

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    I get those days when I hate myself so much. I've always had the self destruction feeling in my mind but I try to ignore it. Some days it's really hard and I have a strong urge to...
    ponycupcake ponycupcake 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 30

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    I have lost interest in med school. But I won't be able to enjoy life outside it because my parents will make it a living hell in retaliation for not fulfilling their dreams. If...
    twelves twelves 22-25 Dec 11

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    Maybe it's the meds, maybe I am fooling myself, maybe one day I might just have a break down... but there are times I have as much emotion as my robotic avatar. I unplug myself...
    PlasticRobot PlasticRobot 36-40, F Nov 21

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    If you were getting a surgery, and a four year old kid walked into the room to be your doctor, you wouldn't say age is just a number. If you saw a seven year old picking up a...
    bsthebenster bsthebenster 18-21, M 5 Responses Nov 26

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    Me too! 33 is taking over my life! The other day I played the lottery and chose the number 33 as one of the numbers. When I bought the ticket - I kid you not - it said, 6:33 when...
    tiffanyamber81 tiffanyamber81 31-35, F Nov 28

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    Oh how I can't wait to die I would speed up the process but I can't cause it would do hurt my family and anyone who cared. The days are to long and tedious the only things that...
    originalmonstermouse originalmonstermouse 16-17, M Nov 30

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    i cant stop drinking every ****** night, i dont feel like killing myself now but im doing a damn good job, only had a piece of pizza and a handfull of checks mix in 4 days. my...
    Pigmaginny Pigmaginny 22-25, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    All I ever see is someone who sucks. I'm starting to look rough and old, more than likely thanks to drinking and partying . I've recently gained quite a bit of weight which also...
    NeverWillBePerfect NeverWillBePerfect 26-30, M 9 hrs ago

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    I have ALWAYS relied on number 1 even as a kid. I counted on noone but me. I got stupid tried relying on others. big mistake! like my aunt told me yesterday in a convo, "no ones...
    wickedlilangel69 wickedlilangel69 31-35, F 1 Response Nov 29

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    My friend tried to get me to drink a few times but I always turned him down. Then one night while in the military some friends were going out drinking and invited me along, I...
    wildcard64 wildcard64 22-25, M 2 Responses Dec 8

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    Place de carrousel So, I'm too small to fit in the shopping mall carousel's steampunk rocket ship. I found this out the hard way. I ended up doing some counting as I didn't quite...
    LegitimateRabbit LegitimateRabbit 18-21, M 2 Responses Nov 22

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    I mean I don't really exercise minus dance and yoga . I eat junk food constantly because I'm too busy to cook for myself and no one takes out food I eat . I smoke . It's a habit...
    Alylovespuppies Alylovespuppies 18-21, F 4 Responses Nov 23

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    1. I'm awkward, apparently haha well I didn't know this at first but as I grew older I just got more awkwarder and well yeah I finally agree. I'm just not someone to express myself...
    daniebravo daniebravo 18-21, F 3 Responses Dec 2

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    Haha I blame myself for being fat... I have in and ordered a pizza and ate most of it, washed down with soft drink... Hello weight gain
    catho catho 18-21, F 3 Responses Dec 5

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    So I have a confession to make. I Don't ever make myself food unless I'm cooking for others..... I know it is pretty lazy of me.... But hear me out for just a second. Okay so you...
    FatFur FatFur 26-30, M 1 Response Dec 6

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