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I Drink to Numb Myself

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 83 People

    There Is Something Missing

    During my college years, I drank primarily for my enjoyment. Over the past year or so, I have found that I have used alcohol as a means of comforting myself. I know that I have a pretty good life, so I am not entirely sure why I need comforting. I have a feeling that there is...
    EvenFlow85 EvenFlow85 26-30, M 1 Response Mar 10, 2011

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    Comfortably Numb

    When I drink… If I’m careful, I can lose myself in the spinning. In the weightlessness of unconscious. I can float, away from everything. Forget for a while. It’s a fine line. To not let the disconnect allow me to think about the things that I don’t...
    onceandfutureglow onceandfutureglow 31-35, F 8 Responses Jul 27, 2010

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    Yes, I Do...

    The first time I got drunk was when I was 19. I had so much confidence and my shyness was gone. Once I turned 20, I drank because I was irritated. Now, (since 21) I drink because I hate my life and have nothing going for me. I use dark humor and drinking to hide the deep pain...
    LovelessDeluxe LovelessDeluxe 22-25 4 Responses Feb 28, 2011

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    I'd Like To

    I don't drink a lot but I wish I could drink to numb myself from the pain of being lonely. If I had the chance I would drink 24/7. It seems like things that happen good in my life always come to an end eventually. I'm just exausted with it happening. I just want to be able...
    tngurl25 tngurl25 26-30, F 3 Responses Dec 11, 2011

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    Wish It Lasted Longer

    When I don't want to cut but I need to cut, I drink. It calms things down and the anxiety fades. I just wish it was not a short term solution. If I cant make the anxiety go away, I can numb it at least.
    empleh empleh 26-30 Sep 10, 2010

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    It's Part Of My Life But Doesn't Rule My Life

    I have been drinking alcohol almost everyday since i was 14 yrs old, i am now 34.I am not a true alcoholic in the sense that yes i do go to work all day ,and can actually go days, weeks or months without alcohol. i just choose NOT to go without. :)
    daro76 daro76 31-35, F 2 Responses Jun 16, 2011

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    I Have Recently

    been told that i was an alcoholic a few months back. i never thought my drinkin was serious. But turns out i was wrong. I still feel the need for drink but the lack of money stops me although every penny i get i usually save up for alcohol. It doesn't scare me...i just don't want...
    xXmissyXx xXmissyXx 16-18, F 2 Responses Aug 12, 2007

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    It helps dull the pain

    and numbs the feeling of lose
    Sufferedloss Sufferedloss 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 23

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    Good Or Bad Feelings, I Just Want To Be Numb

    I drink regardless if my life is going incredibly well or if it's just horrible. I'm so used to being numb that any bit of extreme emotion is just too much for me. I will admit that I do like to drink, period and it's not just solely to be numb, but it's a huge part of it. I don...
    orchidlove23 orchidlove23 22-25, F 2 Responses Apr 1, 2013

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    Tears of a Punk...

    When I drink, it's usually alone and usually because I can't handle how badly my life feels all the time. If I go out and drink with friends I usually end up crying, which is probably why nobody will drink with me anymore. That of course only makes me feel worse about my life. It...
    SadLittlePunk SadLittlePunk 31-35 2 Responses Dec 6, 2008

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    Use to

    That had to be the hardest thing in the world to do! I had to learn how to love me for me again!
    Mammy Mammy 36-40, F Mar 26, 2008

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    Oh No!

    i'm afraid this may become extreme alcoholism. and i don't think i can stop it.
    gypsysoul gypsysoul 22-25, F 1 Response Jun 29, 2007

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    I drink to numb myself.

    Because I feel pain. Drinking just numbs the pain a little. It still hurts, but it hurts a little less. I am alone, but when I drink, it matters less. I want to flee. I want to escape. I don't want to see or feel what I see or feel. I want to disconnect from my feelings. When I...
    RichardAndon RichardAndon 22-25, M 1 Response Jul 18

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    151 Bacardi Street

    im not too pleased with my life so i hit this dive bar frequently. i always shoot 151 straight when i go their. One day a buddy came in and wanted to do a shot of whatever i was having so he did 2 shots of 151 with me. Well i did 6 and played some pool. After the game he was...
    rorer714 rorer714 26-30, M Jan 28, 2013

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    But That Takes A Lot

    I added this experience a while ago and never added the story until now. Since then I've changed my drinking habits a bit. I used to drink to numb myself. I found the pain was so strong, though, that it took an unbelieveably large amount of alcohol to get sufficiently numb. I...
    accomplice accomplice 41-45, M 4 Responses Jan 11, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    My relationship of 7 years ended a few months ago. It was the worst thing that's ever happened to me. I've come a loooonnng way. However, I still don't think I'm fully okay. I've...
    JnyJny JnyJny 26-30, F Aug 20

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    I don't have money for food, a place to stay. So I'm going homeless, no family and nobody who can help me. My drug addiction doesn't really help either. I am having a tough time...
    YoungRidah YoungRidah 18-21, M 2 Responses Aug 9

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    So in due to Labor Day weekend, I bought myself some Smirnoff raspberry vodka, and it's sooo good! Sad that I have to drink by myself :/
    brandijade92 brandijade92 18-21, F 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    I have casual sex with a guy friend of mine. I drink heavily to numb my aching heart in my chest. I smoke pot to relax and fly away. I drink and eat anything with lots of sugar to...
    Rose11231 Rose11231 18-21, F 2 days ago

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    I have hated myself from a very young age. Although my parents never beat me black and blue or locked me in a closet, they played a big role in making me feel completely indequate...
    ridersofrohan ridersofrohan 18-21 1 hr ago

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    I don't drink much... hahaha Yeah, seriously! I'm a nervous person, when I drink, I calm down, my brain gets slower and I get numb. It's a good sensation depending on the drink...
    Allaloneandpoisoned Allaloneandpoisoned 22-25, F 2 Responses Aug 10

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    My story is that I have a sickness inside that I don't know how to make go away. It's hard to define this sickness other than a pervading poison that is eating me from the inside...
    Shellybelle Shellybelle 41-45, F 4 Responses a week ago

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    I'm not into drinking alcohol. I never have been for various reasons. The top reason for me not imbibing is because I do not like the possibility of getting drunk. I've been drunk...
    Nyx78 Nyx78 36-40, F 2 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    I have been sober for one year, seven months, and 27 days. One wouldn't think that I would still struggle not to drink but sometimes I do. Most sober people I meet, or...
    sober79 sober79 41-45, M Aug 11

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    "I like to get drunk alone on the weekends, and just play video games, because it's honestly more fun to "party" by myself". A friend of mine sent me an internet meme, with that...
    DeathstalkerScorpion DeathstalkerScorpion 22-25, M 4 days ago

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    I think I drink to much but when I do I feel happier & seem to be able to express myself better without so much worry about being misunderstood or rejected. I'm trying not to drink...
    xox0xox xox0xox 36-40, F 1 Response Aug 19

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    This is something I have tried but not tried hard enough. When I was in my earlier job, there used to be a girl sitting next to me who always drank water and always had a bottle...
    uselessguy uselessguy 36-40, M 2 Responses a week ago

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    Drank too much at the weekend and now I feel so depressed. I hate this feeling. I really need to stop drinking so much on a night out. I don't know if I do it because I'm exhausted...
    fullen fullen 22-25, M Aug 25

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    Over recent months I have found myself paying more and more for energy drinks and I'm worried as I do not have the self control to stop myself,I haven't opened up to anyone as I am...
    ollieh25 ollieh25 22-25, M 3 days ago

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    Nothing was alive with him. Neither was anything dead. Everything was calm and everything was a rage. He'd make me feel lost in his pool of love while I lose myself in a sea of...
    MoonMusicLover22 MoonMusicLover22 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 11

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    Thripple six, you see that number in so many movies, books and songlyrics but people don't even know what that number actually means. The media tells us that it's the number of...
    Xiara666 Xiara666 18-21, F 9 Responses Aug 19

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    I drink blood because It is salty to me and I cut myself so I can drink my blood hail Satan
    Demonicperson666 Demonicperson666 18-21, M 1 Response Aug 22

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    The number 4...the number 4 is a forgotten number, people count to 3, or say 3rd times the charm...4 is just a regular number, never used to describe or explain anything. The way I...
    maxwaugh maxwaugh 16-17, M 11 hrs ago

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    Almost Back Home I'm almost back back where the sun doesn't shine back where the grass doesn't grow. back where you can't touch my heart back in my black lair. no more running...
    SKiesterly SKiesterly 36-40, F Aug 24

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    Does it count when I'm psychotic the other half of the time? It's like, maybe my whole is just like "yeah, I'm tired, time to be numb now!!" It drives me...well, nowhere, because I...
    RexxTheDinosawr RexxTheDinosawr 18-21, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Okay, so my boyfriend ask me out on 3/23/09. And we broke up on 4/20/12 but got back together 8/1/13. But while we were broken up, apparently we both kept seeing the number 23...
    nmey94 nmey94 18-21, F Aug 4

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    I drink alone. I do so all the time. To be perfectly honest, i prefer drinking alone to drinking in the presence of other people. I simply don't see what the issue is. It is a...
    Lullacus Lullacus 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 11

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    I think we both know I'm a mess So very lost, so very clueless. I dwell upon the past. I dwell upon the tiniest of things Searching for faults For reasons that you will leave I...
    NeverForgeIt NeverForgeIt 16-17, F 2 Responses Aug 12

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    I see 911 everyday as well as 11:11 sometimes one or both up to 3 times a day and I thought 9:11 was linked to sept 11 attack because I dreamed of it the night before it happened...
    laurenlo82 laurenlo82 31-35, F 1 Response Aug 17

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    We all get to a point in life, when we realize that life is not fair at all, most people realize that when they are teenagers, but that's not my case. I was born in a really...
    DeniedWings DeniedWings 18-21, M 2 Responses Aug 5

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    Yes I drink energy drinks. My main choice is monster. But I don't drink them for energy. They calm me. My mind works harder then it normal. Not thesame way ADD or ADHD does to a...
    fallenzero fallenzero 22-25, M 1 Response Aug 6

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    Somehow I eat healthy & exercise. I don't drink , I don't smoke. I need to cut down on coffee. I have 6 cups a day & sometimes decaf at night. I'm terrible for snacking @ night. I...
    baraccio baraccio 26-30, M 2 Responses Aug 6

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    I just feel so disconnected from everything and everyone. The possibility of being bipolar comes to mind given how I can care and, then abruptly, not about something or someone. I...
    littleshadow15 littleshadow15 18-21, M 2 Responses Aug 13

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    I love drinking Coke I love it for the pure caffeine and there's been several times if I don't have it I feel myself having certain withdraws for the caffeine it self I would...
    sweetberries sweetberries 41-45, F Aug 21

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    When I go grocery shopping, I buy the same things. Once in a great while, I'll venture out and buy one or two new things. But for the most part, I eat and drink the same things...
    blossomingbeauti blossomingbeauti 36-40, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    I'm a bit disappointed that I didn't drink before I turned 18, it's like a rite of passage. :p Not that I condone underage people drinking or anything... The only time alcohol was...
    Friability Friability 18-21 1 Response Aug 7

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    Sometimes tears just start flowing naturally, or I'm actually over-thinking and then the tears start flowing. But either way, I wake up with swollen eyes and my eyelids are all...
    zozobar zozobar 18-21, F Aug 8

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    Life, one blink away from destruction, one heartbeat away from death. Everything can change within seconds, your whole world can alter so easily without your consent. The world...
    BleedingOut BleedingOut 16-17, F 1 Response Aug 17

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    I like the numb feeling tho, I guess sometimes I think its a numb feeling when really its just that I have not thought of things that I normally do in awhile. Then when I start...
    Chicgeekgal Chicgeekgal 22-25, F Aug 18