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I Ended My Affair

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 213 People

    Day One Of No Contact...

    Yesterday he left tired and doesn't want to continue this hassle thing to him. He want me to find single and available man and not him. He mention he still care for me and willing to be friends if I want. I snapped it off cause I can't take it when I still love him and he treat...
    n1BB1t n1BB1t 26-30, F 2 Responses Oct 7, 2013

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    I Have Been Having the Most Passionate Affair

    I have been having the most passionate affair for almost 3 yrs and 3 months to the day... I can say it has been one of the most amazing rides of my life.  I have discovered things about myself that i did not know existed, dreams i did not know I had .. But before i start let...
    deleted deleted 26-30 21 Responses Sep 19, 2009

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    This is so confusing.

    OM says he wants me as a friend. Says that's what he has always wanted. I apologized for thinking something more. He responds by saying "I love you. You know that." I'm a pretty intelligent woman, but what???
    friendofmine friendofmine 41-45, F Jan 9

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    No Longer Avoiding the Pain of Saying Goodbye.

    I ended a 5 month affair.  Nope it's not the first but I hope it is the last.  This was my "so called" first love from 22 years ago...always said if I ran into him again I would not be able to contain/ control myself.  Well, I had always looked him...
    road2redemption road2redemption 36-40, F 3 Responses Sep 1, 2009

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    I Know Exactly How It Feels

    Trust me. I know how it feels. I know exactly how it feels to cry in the shower so no one can hear you. I know what it's like to wait for everyone to be asleep so you can fall apart. For everything to hurt so bad you just want it all to end I know exactly how it feels..
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 10 Responses Apr 6, 2013

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    Finally Over

    I just ended the affair I was in 10 days ago. I'd been moving towards that for some time and made the official decision and cut him right off. I do miss him, and I know it's better if I don't hear from him - probably ever - but I was wondering if other OW have eventually heard...
    wandawatson069 wandawatson069 36-40 14 Responses Jan 10, 2011

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    I ended my affair in Oct 2013,

    I then cleared my head and filed for divorce! My divorce was finalized December 2013. I am happy my affair is over and marriage they were both a lie and I was living it, but not anymore!!!!
    Beautifulnbroken Beautifulnbroken 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 18

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    The Aftermath

    Day before yesterday I ended my affair. He was amazing, but also married with 2 kids. I can't even explain the hurt I am feeling right now. Never did I ever think it would feel like this. The night I ended it, I cried a little and finally fell asleep. The conversation we had...
    lovetohatelove lovetohatelove 22-25, F 7 Responses Oct 3, 2013

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    After 7 Months

    I just wanted to share my story, since many of you have so many similar stories as well. I knew my mm for 3 years before we got involved. We used to work together and everything started with "let's have a drink when we are done with work." From the time that we knew each other i...
    Healed77 Healed77 31-35, F 1 Response Sep 17, 2013

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    Of two years. We are

    both married and the lies and secrets just became to much for me to deal with. I miss him terribly. But I know I'm doing the right thing. Even if he would leave his family for me, I wouldn't let him. I'm not a home wrecker. The worst part is we live in the same town and our kids...
    lambxoxo123 lambxoxo123 36-40, F 2 Responses May 19

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    Started With A Bang, Ended With A Whimper...

    Today our love has come to it's bitter conclusion... We are both married, and I truely believe that when you have a family, it's not just about the couple anymore, you have to care for the children until the last one is adult. Especially if there is no abuse involved. His wife...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 9 Responses Apr 4, 2013

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    I've Tried Over And Over..........it Just Keeps Calling (or Strokin) Me!

    I know, I know I need to leave this married man alone! I can't - it keeps callin me (DON'T JUDGE!) Now saying I need to leave, quit, stop, end the maddness is easier said than done, and plus I am weak! Here's my scoop: Met my lover on CL, after many texts, emails and some...
    chie5189 chie5189 36-40 4 Responses Jan 12, 2012

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    Yes we ended it, somewhere in the first 3 days

    of April. There has been no contact until last week, we started emailing. We aren't exchanging #'s, and our emails are few and far between and we have not spoken a word about our relationship or feelings. So I feel I'm in complete control, for now. He is ok with exchanging...
    platnum2011 platnum2011 26-30, F 1 Response May 25

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    It's only been two days.

    How do you grieve the loss of a love and still keep it a secret?
    friendofmine friendofmine 41-45, F 5 Responses Jan 8

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    Party Over Here!!! -- Oh Yeah...??

    So I did it. I really did this time.  Three weeks and counting.  3.5yrs of my life now punctuated and relegated to secret stashes of forbidden electronic images.  For the first time in just about as long as I can remember, I am a "virtuous" woman.  I can drag my a$$ to...
    Colormevibrant Colormevibrant 46-50, F 7 Responses Mar 20, 2013

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    It's been 9 days since it ended.

    I miss him so badly. I want to text him but would feel destroyed if he didn't return it or if it turned out badly. I'm having a very hard time with our breakup
    lolababy71 lolababy71 41-45, F 4 Responses Jun 7

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    Well I think it has officially happened.

    I thought it had a couple months ago, but he contacted me and we picked right back up where we left off. But things just sort of ended on monday. He was starting to neglect me and ignore me for hours at a time, then a day would go by before he would contact me, and now we are...
    platnum2011 platnum2011 26-30, F 1 Response Jan 29

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    But I Still Can't Make Up My Mind

    It was a short affair, the feelings about lying to my husband were eating me up inside, so one day when he asked me what was wrong, I told him. He took it far harder than I could have imagined. After what was supposed to be a goodbye from my husband, as I was recklessly...
    Cavernio Cavernio 31-35 Oct 18, 2013

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    What do you do when you've done everything to

    forget the other person but your heart still can't let go, and you still can't move on? When every day feels more torturous than the last? When you know they don't care about you anymore, you're not in their hearts, they're living their happily ever after? What do you do? Do you...
    Missybad Missybad 26-30, F 5 Responses Nov 30, 2013

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    How To Kill Love?

    The goal is not to simply cease kissing, touching or caressing my precious lover (ow). It is to conclude the love entirely. Victory is recorded when I no longer feel the pressure on my heart at the sight, mention or thought of her. This is the challenge I have been issued. But...
    Sweetman17 Sweetman17 46-50, M 2 Responses Sep 9, 2013

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    It Was Beautiful While It Lasted

    I ended it before I had to. One Sunday evening at the mall, going to shop for a few things, as we were passing a bar & restaurant, she enthusiastically stopped and asked if I didn't mind if she stayed there to get a few drinks while I shopped. I had some idea that she would be...
    eleanorssong eleanorssong 56-60, F 2 Responses Dec 1, 2011

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    So after 19 months, I ended my affair this

    evening. I sent him an email telling him that I can no longer sustain the affair. We're both married and neither of our spouses found out and, unlike others who have ended it over guilt, that's not why I ended it. I've just come to this place where I'm tired of feeding his...
    lynn49 lynn49 46-50, F 3 Responses Jul 5

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    I saw him last night

    for a few hours. Just to talk. It was hard for both of us but the hardest part is missing the friendship. Maybe it's too soon but we are trying to be just friends again. While I love spending time with him, saying goodbye at the end hurt a lot.
    friendofmine friendofmine 41-45, F 4 Responses Jan 11

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    I think it's for real this time.

    ... I've deleted him as a contact from my phone and I don't know his # by heart, so the chances of me communicating with him are slim.......it will only happen if he sends me a message. I've also deleted all of his photos, which is probably going to help but right now ALL of this...
    platnum2011 platnum2011 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 2

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    Today

    I reconnected with my partner yesterday and decided to end it with my AP. Relationships aren't perfect but eventually all affairs become dull after a while. Did any of you stay friends with your AP? Is it wise too or not?
    MissDarkAngel MissDarkAngel 31-35, F 3 Responses Oct 2, 2013

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    Walking Away From Love

    I love to laugh. Humor and laughter are the spice of life for me. Part of why I love being a father so much is the laughter and silliness they create in my life everyday. It is also what first attracted me to my OW. She is beautiful and brilliant but she also makes me laugh and...
    Sweetman17 Sweetman17 46-50, M 7 Responses Aug 19, 2013

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    I Ended My Affair.

    I've been trying to end my affair for the last month.  I also tried to end my affair last week, but he talked me out of it.  I've been doing a lot of thinking and talking to it about friends it and I was killing myself.  We went away together a month ago. ...
    tks tks 36-40, F 25 Responses Oct 26, 2007

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    What A Silly Thing To Do

    Things where not great with my hubby and I met this guy who I thought was brilliant and after a few weeks i came out and told my hubby I was having an affair ! 6 weeks past and I was in a bad place missing my hubby who is also the father of my baby the other guy had turned out to...
    hannahbear93 hannahbear93 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 23, 2013

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    Almost Unbearable

    Even though it's over, I find myself missing him immensely, wanting him to hold me close one last time just to whisper some soothing words saying everything will be alright. I know he'll never be a part of my life, yet I can't seem to let go of him. He consumes my thought daily...
    Missybad Missybad 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 24, 2013

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    Day Three Of No Contact

    Saw him the first time in office since d day. He is still sitting behind me even though he promised to do me a favor to change seat for me not to see him. When I reached office, I heard him discussing with another colleague saying he played a new game yesterday. He is happy...
    n1BB1t n1BB1t 26-30, F 3 Responses Oct 10, 2013

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    Treason Of The Heart

    My veins are full, arteries swollen. Joy chased away and grief replaces. My heart no longer pumps oxygen into my blood but instead makes it run cold. One love creates. The other chases. Expand to contain. Constrict to protect. Stop beating. Stop beating. Stop. Beating.
    Sweetman17 Sweetman17 46-50, M 2 Responses Sep 4, 2013

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    Hopefully This Time Is For Good

    I've been unfaithful to my partner of almost six years. I fell in love with someone else last summer. I still love him but what I did was wrong and I'm tired of being a coward who wants to have the best of both worlds. About five or six weeks ago I ended things with the OM and...
    LoveBeth13 LoveBeth13 26-30, F 6 Responses Mar 24, 2013

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    Love That Hurts To Give

    Thought I would share some communication I received from my ow today. It has been nearly two months since the end of the affair. She and I were quite in love. I am married. She single. She shared she has been doing a lot of therapy and trying to work through some issues. Here...
    Sweetman17 Sweetman17 46-50, M 4 Responses Sep 20, 2013

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    I feel so sad. It ended

    after a fight about him being selfish and inconsiderate of me when I am the opposite with him. I know I broke it off, but I miss him. I blocked his number off for two days because I didn't trust myself not to call or text him back like the other times. He did try to call twice...
    lolababy71 lolababy71 41-45, F 1 Response Jun 2

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    Day 4 NC. Everything Is Grey.

    Day 4 of no contact. I’ve read all the books. I’ve watched all the shows. I should have known better, but I was a victim of hope. Until I got far enough into my affair I had no idea that being a “victim of hope” was even a thing.. But it is. We had worked together...
    lyrics101 lyrics101 36-40, F 6 Responses Aug 12, 2013

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    Today is day 6. I think I did better today

    as far as not being upset or thinking about him than I have all week. But now I am thinking of him. And it hurts. I miss him. I love him. He hasn't been at work for two days. The next two days will be difficult because they are the evenings we spend together. I don't know what I...
    lolababy71 lolababy71 41-45, F 1 Response Jun 4

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    Sometimes I Miss My Affair That I Had...

    The affair ended 2 years and I miss him a lot. I still think about him and miss our great connection. He was a single guy and we met at a bar and I lied about being single. We had sex on 2nd night we hung out and it was amazing. He told me he loved me after having the affair for...
    xoxoluvu xoxoluvu 26-30, F 4 Responses Aug 18, 2013

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    Why an affair can be a necessary evil - from

    the point of view of a man. (see story below in comment area due to content restriction)...
    FiremanforYou FiremanforYou 31-35, M 1 Response Mar 24

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    I Ended My Affair

    even though im in love with the man i broke it off with, bec i know its the right thing to do and my husband is really truly a great man who i love very much...any advice on how to move on, figure out how i feel about my marriage, etc?
    IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm 31-35, F 18 Responses Apr 26, 2011

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    Tough - But The Right Thing To Do

    First of all, the internet is a wonderful place to 'talk' when there is no one else you can talk with...Add me to the list of people that never, ever thought they would find themselves in a forum such as this.  I 'fell' into an affair with my son's coach - it's been sporadic...
    simplycrazy simplycrazy 36-40, F 6 Responses Nov 10, 2009

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    Today, probably the hardest thing I had to do

    was end the affair with a married man, that recently I realised that I was in love with him.... It's so hard and I'm just thinking about everything now... It wasn't easy but as soon as I got home and cried my eyes out I felt such a relief!!! Such a relief! But sadly I'm sitting...
    blondebeauxo blondebeauxo 22-25, F 1 Response Mar 4

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    I just ended my affair of a year

    and a half and I’m so sick feeling. My story starts years ago at the beginning of my 13 year marriage. I married a **** addict and a compulsive liar who deceived me for years. When I finally confronted him the first time he said he would stop and never do it again. A few...
    kimbermom kimbermom 36-40, F 1 Response May 27

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    Related Experiences

    I've posted my affair story, so not going to repeat. I've finished my Affair, which is why this title says, I HAD an affair. It's been 5 months since I was together with the...
    OnAlert OnAlert 56-60, M 9 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    After I found out the affair, after the initial denials, my husband ultimately severed contact with his AP. He had created a email account just for her and cleared that out too and...
    missingherbigtime missingherbigtime 31-35, F 6 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    I am an affair success story. Due to my x-h's controlling behaviour toward me (coupled with alcohol abuse) for years, I checked out of my marriage a few years ago. I allowed fear...
    dayflight dayflight 31-35 8 Responses Jul 15

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    I ended my affair 4 months ago. I'm continuing to work on my marriage, however, I am having difficulty enjoying sex with my husband. His sex drive is pretty much dead due to his...
    Musicalangel13 Musicalangel13 31-35, F 10 Responses 6 days ago

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    I hate the word affair I believe it should be called what it really is cheating.
    Soevil10 Soevil10 31-35, M 1 hr ago

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    Denial.... I haven't accepted his decision to end things. How could he? Where the heck did he find the strength? Why would he end it when the sex was so damn amazing? I...
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 6 Responses Jul 4

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    I held off for months. I am a college professor and a grad student of mine kept flirting with me. She was 28, married, short hair and very attractive. We would have great...
    onjourney onjourney 46-50, M 11 Responses Jul 6

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    Did anyone have success re-establishing sex and not only sex, but passion back in their marriage after they had an affair? If you have re-established sex with wife/husband...
    Fmina Fmina 51-55, F 6 Responses Jul 2

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    Emotional Affair: Was she Narcissistic or Borderline Waif? I am a married man with two beautiful children and a wonderful wife. I have never “physically” cheated on my wife...
    DriveRiggins DriveRiggins 41-45, M 2 Responses Jul 9

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    This was something I wrote before I ended my affair. But now I have ended it but not a minute goes by when my MM isn't in my thoughts, he brought so much negativity to my life but...
    Gaffa1234 Gaffa1234 22-25, F 4 Responses Jun 28

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