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I Enjoy Cutting Myself

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 91 People

    Relapsed

    No one would be able to tell by my outward appearance and actions that I was--and still am--addicted to SI (mainly cutting). It was 2007; I was 13 and in eighth grade when I first started cutting myself. From that day I first picked up the single-edged razor kept in the junk...
    bean6661 bean6661
    22-25, F
    Aug 12, 2013

    All I Want To Be Is Normal.

    Hello I'm Olivia I am currently 15 years old, I'll be 16 this July.i got introduced to cutting about 5 years ago. I always knew what it was because I thought it was something interesting and it started off with cutting the top of my hand in elementary school. Because it was...
    Princessolivia Princessolivia
    18-21, F
    Jun 21, 2012

    Feels Good

    Just last night i was cutting myself, i am currently going through  a divorce, and that added with some extra stress and disalusions about someone else in my life who turned out to stick a knife in my guts with the old "your such a nice guy line" i was at work...
    jerrio36 jerrio36
    36-40, M
    Feb 21, 2009

    Something About The Blood...

    the reason i cut is because i feel like i deserve it. i am a worthless human being. but for some reason, there are people that for some weird and unknown reason care about me, and i hold out hope that my other half is out there somewhere, so i cut so i feel like im being punished...
    americanoddity americanoddity
    18-21, F
    1 Response Sep 11, 2011

    I Know How You Feel

    I know whats its like to want to die how it hurts to smile; how to try to fit in but you can't; how you hurt yourself on the outside' to try to kill the thing that's in the inside
    PinkiieeBabyy PinkiieeBabyy
    18-21
    1 Response Oct 17, 2011

    A Different Side Of Me.

    Hello, I am 15 years old and I've been cutting my self for a least two years already. Nobody know what i really been doing. I do it to release stress. I use to use glass on my skin but it didn't make me bleed like i wanted to happen. When i moved on to Razor, that made me bleed...
    octobersky666 octobersky666
    22-25, F
    Sep 15, 2013

    Tell Me The Truth

    Tell me you don't take that blade and drag it across your skin and pray for the courage to press down.
    PinkiieeBabyy PinkiieeBabyy
    18-21
    Oct 17, 2011

    Silence The Voices

    I have been beaten since I was very young and still fight for my right to stand on my own to this day. Years of abuse and solitude will drive you crazy, or so I've heard. Around the age of 14, I heard them. They scared me at first, now I resize they're a part of me. Foster...
    sarahbeth8390 sarahbeth8390
    22-25, F
    Feb 2, 2013

    I started when I was 14 I was goin tho hell

    this are my dark days when I stopped I thought it I was done forever till my resent bf broke it off and tould me for six months he lied when he said he loved me he really didn't know whither he did or not so I now have15 cuts on my legs and I love the controll the pain myself
    cuddlebutt5 cuddlebutt5
    22-25, F
    1 Response Feb 21, 2014

    The Secret Shame

    i started in middle school...never really stopped. Adults found out but I didn't care because it was my only escape from the messed up life I live in. I have lost many lovers and friends over it but all that does is make me want to do it more. I feel like my scars are a part...
    SecretShame SecretShame
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Jul 29, 2010

    I get angry or depressed.

    Everyone does. But it isn't really socially acceptable to take your anger out on the people who are hurting you. So how am I supposed to deal with it? I deal with it the only way I know how. I cut myself. It feels fantastic. Seeing the blood makes me happy. I wish I knew why. I...
    jokersjesture jokersjesture
    18-21, F
    1 Response May 13, 2014

    Just Because I Can

     How I feel about cutting-- I was 12 when I first started cutting.. my 21st birthday is coming soon.. I love cutting myself. I love the feeling of the blood runnign down my arm and i move the blade over my wrist. It is like all the tears and pain get washed away with...
    thekath thekath
    18-21, F
    Jul 4, 2009

    <3

    She’s emo? You’d cut too, if you’ve been through what she has. She’s anorexic? You’d be too, if everyone called you fat everyday. She’s a w.hore? She made one mistake that cost her, her reputation. She’s a showoff? Her parents abused her, & she’s never heard of...
    PinkiieeBabyy PinkiieeBabyy
    18-21
    2 Responses Oct 17, 2011

    The Blade And The Battle.

    It started in 6th grade, a few shallow scratches, then a little blood, but as time moved on I got addicted to that lush feeling of the sharp blade sinking and biting into my warm flesh. The blood dripping, the open, stinging wound. I'm 16 now and a junior in highschool, and I...
    Mandabearrawr Mandabearrawr
    18-21, F
    May 4, 2012

    Not Your Typical Person And Ashamed

    I don't think I'm the typical person to cut, but I do come from similar experiences. I was a victim of sexual abuse from a family member and kind of coped throughout my life by going *null*. I didn't feel anything, I got married, I had three beautiful children, I earned four...
    math33 math33
    31-35
    Sep 21, 2010

    Im New to This!

    Hi my name is klanetta Im a mom of 5  and a wife. I have been going through a lot of things I have been abused as my dad as a child an a adult I was neglected by my mom. Nowe I be going through a lot of things in my marriage also I use to get really angry and I just had to...
    goldenrose32 goldenrose32
    31-35, F
    7 Responses Aug 22, 2008

    The Go-to Guy...

    My razor is my go to guy. I cut again today for the first time in a long time. I cannot begin to say how much better I feel. I had to do it after I got my tattoo because it felt so much like cutting and made me realize how much I miss it. I have my relief back.
    SecretSpirit SecretSpirit
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jul 16, 2011

    God Words..(i Think..)

    If u think life's ''pathitic'',it is U that is pathitic.Like the going goes ''Thee who are painfull,thee shall be pained'' means ''them who hurts people,People shall hurt them''
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Aug 25, 2011

    Things Change..

     It has been quite a while since I have last been on this site. I looked back at the story I had written here, the first story posted on this page actually. So much has changed since that day. I had gotten much worse with my cutting for a short while, my wounds littering my arms...
    prettylikedrugs prettylikedrugs
    26-30, F
    5 Responses Jul 29, 2011

    Cutting Myself.

    I am Thirteen, and I cut myself. You all may see this as a horrible thing. but the way I see it, I can't stop. It's like telling a druggie to stop taking drugs. It's hard. But I like to hurt myself, see blood pouring from my wrists. Why do I cut? Simple, because of my mother, she...
    kissandrun kissandrun
    18-21, F
    Apr 20, 2012

    My Addiction

    I feel I truelly need help with my cutting but have no place to turn too, even though most of my scars are visable to any one, I only have one person to talk to about it and that person really doesn't understand why I do it. I don't really know how to tell either, I...
    kyla47 kyla47
    18-21, F
    Mar 5, 2010

    Cutting Myself.

    I am Thirteen, and I cut myself. You all may see this as a horrible thing. but the way I see it, I can't stop. It's like telling a druggie to stop taking drugs. It's hard. But I like to hurt myself, see blood pouring from my wrists. Why do I cut? Simple, because of my mother, she...
    kissandrun kissandrun
    18-21, F
    Apr 20, 2012

    Seasoned Cutter : My Reasons Have Changed

    Hello fellow cutters...I am a 30 yr old mom of 2. I'm not depressed and I don't necessarily dislike myself most of the time. I have an awesome job and am an intelligent and likeable person. My family loves me my friends are great. But still....I like to cut myself. Like most of...
    Oktober82 Oktober82
    26-30, F
    Oct 29, 2012

    why? why is it that when i get severely upset

    it literally feels like the only way to control this overwhelming feeling is to stick whatever i can find that is sharp enough into my skin and tear at it until i see blood start to flow from the opening? i am 20 years old, have been cutting myself when feelings of absolute...
    sav01 sav01
    18-21, F
    May 19, 2015

    My Blood Art

    I use to cut I loved how the blood looked and I would not just cut I would cut pictures on me I have stoped cutting my self but sometime it is hard not to go back to doing it I hope that everyone can stop it it is hard but you feel so free after you have quit cutting I hope...
    kaylatheanimegirl3 kaylatheanimegirl3
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Aug 24, 2011

    I don't hold punches on this topic with you

    guys. If I am going to be honest, yeah I enjoyed the cutting, most days from the minute I left for school or work until I got home that's what I looked forward to was the blade or clippers, and what could I to do my hands, feet, and stomach. I enjoyed it so much that I would...
    mlcockrell mlcockrell
    41-45, M
    Feb 13, 2014

    I Like to See My Own Blood

    Today, people feel free to talk about a lot of things. Even at the private Christian school I attend, we discuss homosexuality, drugs, STDs, sex, alcohol, partying, rape, etc. One thing we never discuss, though, is cutting. The few times we do, people always give reasons for...
    SomethingHidden SomethingHidden
    18-21, F
    Jan 6, 2009

    Emo *inside*

    i used to be a cutter AND a burner,god!i wish i could do it again,i wish they didnt have to care!sigh,i do not like life right now.or ever.i just want to feel that numbing pain again..(burning)
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    4 Responses Aug 25, 2011

    It Makes Everything Worth It

    when im done cutting and look at my beautiful artwork carved on my wrist it makes the pain worth it, seeing the lines matched up down to my elbow gets me high. yesterday i carved fat ugly ***** & it looks so pretty
    PinkiieeBabyy PinkiieeBabyy
    18-21
    2 Responses Oct 3, 2011

    Depression

    Saddness feels like water filling your lungs,you can't breath,you can't move,you can't do anything...Your friends are the only thing that keeps you from drowning again,and again,and again
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Aug 25, 2011

    Gr.9

    when i was in grade 9 i started cutting myself...i did it on my stomach and thighs and it has just gotten worst ever since...back in may of this year i promised my best friend that i wouldn't do it again but i have a couple of times and she doesn't know cuz she told me if i did...
    killmenow23 killmenow23
    18-21
    Sep 20, 2011

    I Love It and Hate It

    Ive been cutting for years. i know its wrong and all that but to tell the truth i enjoy it. i do it not only for the sense of control but for the addrenaline rush, for the ache that lasts for days. its like a drug that leaves you with an unbeleivable high, one that you become...
    prettylikedrugs prettylikedrugs
    26-30, F
    5 Responses Feb 9, 2008

    It isn't what I ever expected.

    I have moved forward and become a counselor. I understand the BEAUTY of it tho. I don't understand the kids doin it but I get replacing one pain with another. I can not and will not judge. I will be me and be there for you. But sometimes.............. just sometimes........
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Mar 6, 2014

    Volunteers Needed For A Research Study On Self Injury

    Share your experience- Help increase understanding about self-injury! Have you intentionally cut yourself in the last 30 days? We invite you to share your experience by participating in a short online study. The purpose of this research is to examine health factors related to...
    ODUResearcher ODUResearcher
    26-30, F
    May 21, 2012

    Looking Back

    the other day i happened to dig out my awesome Hello Kitty journal that i got for my 17th birthday from it's hiding spot. i started flipping through and browsing some of the entries, and this is what i found: "It's October 25. I'm Liz Parker & there are two reasons I LOVE to cut...
    mutilatedalex mutilatedalex
    18-21, F
    2 Responses May 30, 2011

    It Is What It Is

    I started cutting at a very early age. 14 to be exact. I am 20 now, soon to be 21, so I have been cutting for almost 7 years. It all started when my at the time "boyfriend" told me he occasionally cut himself to make him feel better. Immediately I thought "Well that's just stupid...
    ashley0320 ashley0320
    18-21, F
    1 Response Jan 31, 2012

    Try To Understand.

    my emotions fill my body. they cannot escape. every thought. every tear. every word i wanna shout. to tell anyone about the pain i'm constantly in. to tell my mom that my depression doesn't make me crazy. to tell my best friends i love them. i don't know what to do. my mind...
    mutilatedalex mutilatedalex
    18-21, F
    Oct 4, 2011

    Cutting Sexually Arouses Me

    I've always wanted to be cut while having sex. Sado-masochism is great but, this is a whole new level!! Ladies, you know how pain and pleasure go together like your first few times?? Well sometimes when I'm up for it I cut myself in the shower--while I'm on all fours, moaning and...
    MadisonJones MadisonJones
    18-21, F
    4 Responses Feb 25, 2013

    *Again, Blade To Skin*

    i guess my body is just looking for an excuse, to cut, to mutilate (in a sense) this time it was different, i got a new, thinner, sharper razor.... slick and silver. i teased my bare skin for few minutes, then the the cold steel bite into me. hot metal inside of my warm flesh. at...
    SilverRed SilverRed
    18-21, M
    7 Responses Aug 23, 2011

    I Started Cutting Again.

    I raised myself because my Dad is an alcoholic & my mother is a drug addict along with everyone in my family. When it was the end of my 5th grade year I just wanted my life to change, I'd been very depressed. So I starved myself/cut/made myself threw up. I hate(d) everything...
    painkiller96 painkiller96
    18-21, F
    Sep 18, 2011

    Her Story

    Hi Guys, My name is Annie, i'm 13, and i cut. i think it all began in fourth grade when my friends started to use me as their punching bag. they would call me fat, ugly, worthless, disgusting, and after all that i still stayed friends with them. then, fast forward four years...
    elloelloelloannie elloelloelloannie
    22-25, F
    1 Response May 12, 2013

    Volunteers Needed For A Research Study On Self Injury

    Share your experience- Help increase understanding about self-injury! Have you intentionally cut yourself in the last 30 days? We invite you to share your experience by participating in a short online study. The purpose of this research is to examine health factors related to...
    ODUResearcher ODUResearcher
    26-30, F
    May 21, 2012
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