I Fear That I Will Never Survive Motherhood

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 54 People

    I wanted to be a mom my whole life,

    but this is not what I thought it would be. I am a single mother.. Their dad lives across town but does nothing for them except pay child support. I bust my butt working up to 3 jobs to give them the things they want. All I get in return is insane fighting between kids...
    LilLulu1 LilLulu1
    41-45, F
    Feb 27

    Im Struggling With My Son's Behaviour Problems

    I struggling to cope with my son's aggessive behavouir s . He does have autism , but not severe with it for hes high funtioning . I tried to get him to clean hes bedroom but he refused to do it and told me to do it , I said to him I wont play anymore games with him then . I then...
    mishy40 mishy40
    36-40
    Jan 3, 2012

    I Don't Know If I'd Be a Good Mom

    Sometimes I freak myself out when I think about what it would be like to raise children. I think about how stressed and anxious and depressed I already am right now, and I can't even imagine what it might be like with children in my life. I get scared that I wouldn't be able to...
    paperalias paperalias
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Apr 17, 2008

    My son is with his father every other weekend,

    and we recently agreed that he should have him a couple of hours every wedensday as well. That's great. It really is. I'm thankfull that he's a good father that loves his son and wants to spend time with him. But the thing is... I want to live his life. I want to work as much...
    Thisisnotwhatiwanted Thisisnotwhatiwanted
    26-30, F
    Mar 13, 2015

    A Famous Quote, "motherhood Is The Lonliest Place A Woman Can Ever Face."

    I heard that quote once and it never really sunk in until I had my own child.  He's 2 and a half now.  As far as toddlers go I guess he's pretty good.  He's not the problem.  He's 2.  He's suppose to be needy, hyper, bad, and good all in the same five...
    Penguinfriends Penguinfriends
    36-40, F
    3 Responses Nov 16, 2009

    New Mommy

    I last gave birth May of 1998 but I am just now getting to really know and love my kids. I am falling in love with them. I am going back and remembering their little faces and and their little eyes because when I first met t5hem I didn't feel or I didn't allow myself to feel. I...
    cutiesagi cutiesagi
    70+
    1 Response Sep 26, 2012

    Where's the Kleenex?!

    my son was so mean to me last night on the way to his basketball game that i was practically in tears the whole way.  if it hadn't been for the fact that my neighbor was in the car with us, i probably would have had a nervous breakdown (thank goodness for small miracles...
    trixi trixi
    41-45, F
    3 Responses Mar 7, 2008

    My Version Of Motherhood.

    There are those that say that being a mom is the greatest thing that they hae ever experienced, that being home with their kids 24/7 is the most rewarding thing that they have ever done. In a way I envy those woman, in a way I wish that I could have that same feeling about being...
    scarrlettfever scarrlettfever
    26-30, F
    1 Response Jan 13, 2013

    Cirque De Me

    this morning i had to practically do a circus act to get my daughter up for school.  she stayed up way too late last night (against my admonitions) and then couldnt get up for nothin. my kids do this all the time--especially when i've got a deadline or assignments to do...
    trixi trixi
    41-45, F
    4 Responses Mar 3, 2008

    Failure To Launch

    I have never written anything on any boards before, but I think I must need to vent. My son has just turned 16, and I really think he will never get his act together. He is very handsome, physically fit, average intelligence, is fluent in 4 languages, but....he is SO LAZY!! He...
    GrabbingLifeByTheHorns GrabbingLifeByTheHorns
    36-40, F
    4 Responses Aug 7, 2013

    My daughter is my clean slate.

    I am no longer a *****, insert any derogatory statement. I am clean of my past sins because of her. I am in a relationship but we fight often; I believe in commitment but I can honestly say I am terrified of the idea of having to be a single mother if this doesn't work out and...
    thegirlinthegreencar thegirlinthegreencar
    26-30, F
    Apr 17, 2014

    Oh God I Want to Run Away and Never Come Back

    my entire life is my kids.  and yet there's no reward at the end of the day.  well, i can't say that cuz my angel of a daughter does everything in her power to please me, but the level of neediness, the level of responsibility required, the neverendingness of it...
    trixi trixi
    41-45, F
    6 Responses Feb 5, 2008

    Related Experiences

    I am afraid the end is near, so let's do it once more :) First I want to give A HUGE THANK YOU to all this people: MysterySci, DespairHope, KT3535, GraceBro (deleted...
    GentleReader GentleReader
    16-17, M
    Apr 21
    I just wanted to take this opportunity to make my last goodbye. I loved this website from the bottom of my heart and I loved the people on it. Thank you for being there and I will...
    Cainamythgimoj Cainamythgimoj
    18-21, M
    1 Response Apr 21
    Thanks everyone! EP has been my second home too like anyone else here.
    EPNids EPNids
    36-40, F
    8 Responses Apr 21
    Its the saddest day I've experienced in a long time, the day Prince died. He will forever be loved and missed.
    Msprissy Msprissy
    36-40, F
    Apr 21
    RIP Prince Rogers Nelson. You were truly one in a million and will never be forgotten or replaced.
    diablow diablow
    41-45, M
    Apr 21
    It's been a long day without you, my EPAnd I'll tell you all about it when I see you againWe've come a long way from where we beganOh, I'll tell you all about it when I see you...
    MirusMe MirusMe
    18-21, M
    Apr 21
    Hey guys I'm in a huge rut at the moment and I feel like complete crap. I've fallen in love with a girl I met online on a depression support app. She's from the US and I'm from the...
    DeanMart1n DeanMart1n
    18-21, M
    3 Responses Apr 21
    Just came to say that although this was my new profile, I will never forget where my old profile took me, to the reaches of East India and back, I have met some really great people...
    NewAvenger NewAvenger
    36-40, M
    Apr 21
    This is just one of many messages in this group and unlike other times I'm afraid it will reach noone. EP is a place where everyone is heard, where everyone can fit in. Even though...
    Vakuum Vakuum
    13-15, T
    Apr 21
    Gee Wilikers. Where do we go from here? Anyways, when I found this site over 7 months ago, I didn't expect to make any friends, fall in love, bond or whatever. But I did and I will...
    ToughKitty ToughKitty
    31-35, F
    7 Responses Apr 21
    I can never hate a person. I never had the ability to hate anything. I can only hate the actions that one commits in this life. I am not in control of a person's character. I...
    AmaterasuNoOkami AmaterasuNoOkami
    18-21, F
    1 Response Apr 21
    Wow! The reality is setting in that we will never have something like this again. We met alot of people here and there are of course many that we have not even met yet. Strangers...
    butterflyskye butterflyskye
    31-35, F
    Apr 21
    I haven’t written a story in a looong while on here, but I feel like since EP is going on “pause” I need to close with a story and say my thanks =) When I joined EP it was...
    Dan193 Dan193
    22-25, M
    4 Responses Apr 21
    I'm afraid of feeling lost. Even if I talk to a person once or twice, some of them can almost feel like a parental figure. I want them to see me grow, and know that they have...
    Arrowheaddd Arrowheaddd
    13-15, F
    Apr 20
    well with less then 24 hours left before the big goodbye I will say a few final parting words. My time here on EP has been fun. I've met lots of interesting people. Some good...
    rorytheawesomeboy rorytheawesomeboy
    18-21, M
    1 Response Apr 20
    EP is just an amazing place. I'm glad I have found it. I have found many friends on here. I'm already missing it now. EP is my family and I will never forget it.
    colourflame colourflame
    13-15, F
    Apr 20
    This will have to be written early since on April 25 this site will be gone. On April 25, 2008 my best friend gave birth to a precious baby boy. His name was Levi. on April 25, 2...
    CallmeHopelessNotRomantic CallmeHopelessNotRomantic
    36-40, F
    1 Response Apr 20
    feels like i am in the ep senior year high school or college its ending and so many good memories the time will never come again cant deny you will missed a lot ep :)
    bimvim bimvim
    18-21, M
    1 Response Apr 20
    I don't even know where to start. It saddens me to see EP go. I have so many good memories of it and have been fortunate enough to meet the best people I've ever known from here...
    Jennifer337 Jennifer337
    31-35, T
    2 Responses Apr 20
    As EP comes to a close, I have mixed emotions. Within the first three days if joining back in November of 2014, unexpectingly I met and connected with someone on the emotional...
    Purpleorchid777 Purpleorchid777
    46-50, F
    Apr 20
    whooooooo! thanks ep! I already got a real job contract in my face. not just a verbal one! ;D apartment ending on April 27.. phew.. I didn't sign yet. but I plan signing tomorrow...
    yayepisoverimsad yayepisoverimsad
    22-25, F
    Apr 20
    hit me up if you're younger and like guys my age
    sterman0937 sterman0937
    26-30, M
    Apr 20
    I was homeschooled through high school and I was raised by elderly relatives and separate from my brother. I grew up in a lower-middle class environment and was sheltered and as a...
    desertonion desertonion
    26-30, M
    2 Responses Apr 19
    Well I guess this is good bye. I have learnt so much from this site and it has been a honor and a experience I will never forget. I would have loved for this site to stay but all...
    chubbyboy19 chubbyboy19
    18-21, M
    1 Response Apr 19
    All of this, this group and all the stories here, are really impressive... in the most horrible of the possibile ways. What I'm most impressed with are the amount and similarity of...
    TotalVoid TotalVoid
    26-30
    Apr 19
    I met someone once. We could not be together. So we stopped talking and than we started again and again everything came back. And again we started talking but I don't think we can...
    Llarra Llarra
    26-30, F
    1 Response Apr 19
    I may be a little more reserved but I seldom back down if I know I am right about an issues at work. However, I never back down from my family, friends, and even strangers if I...
    southernnudistlifestyle southernnudistlifestyle
    36-40, F
    1 Response Apr 19
    I have had a really great time on this site. I have been here from 2013. I made a really great friends here. I will never forget my experience here and friends I made from here.
    vinny87 vinny87
    26-30, M
    Apr 19
    ******* off on tumblr to an 8 year old
    letschat29 letschat29
    16-17, M
    1 Response Apr 18
    7 days ago my husband tried to take his own life. Day to day life has been difficult of Late. My husband has been out of work for the best part of 3.5 years and in that time he...
    twilightmum twilightmum
    36-40, F
    Apr 17
    You had no idea How lucky you were I always Had your back Never a doubt In my mind Until you Put them there, With your lying And manipulative ways
    EscapingUrLies EscapingUrLies
    31-35, F
    1 Response Apr 16
    I like f*****g dogs so much
    LittleSlut666 LittleSlut666
    22-25, F
    16 Responses Apr 16
    I've had some really MEAN people REALLLLLY try to bring me down lately. I've had to leave them all behind. Its just me now. BUT , I still will NEVER give up, even if I have no...
    amnotthattired amnotthattired
    26-30, F
    Apr 16
    I recently completely left a very violent abusive guy who nearly killed me. Um. He tried to make me stop having fun on life. Ha. I'm free now,and I will NEVER give up. Plus there's...
    amnotthattired amnotthattired
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Apr 16
    I come from a broken home my mom as a crack head, my brother in jail for life for murder and we don't know our dad. I was in foster care from when I was 13 til 18 then I had...
    karabrown karabrown
    18-21, F
    7 Responses Apr 15
    I don't fear my own death to some extent, but I'm devastated if someone close dies. At the end, we will all die, my parents will die, and many years after, I will also die just...
    lonelylifeindia lonelylifeindia
    26-30, M
    2 Responses Apr 13
    -Life In Transition: A Compilation of Memories-I was born biologically male, but over the course of my life, have realized that my mind and soul on the inside feels female. Women...
    KayleeBehrens KayleeBehrens
    18-21, T
    Apr 13
    The first time a man tried to hit me, my sister got in the way. He broke her arm. He apologized profusely all the way to the hospital. Explaining how it was all an accident... How...
    Lullacus Lullacus
    22-25, F
    Apr 12
    I will Never Forget EP, the site that brought so many people together, the site that let me share with others what I hadn't been able to before Never forget your friends 
    FluttershyLabeouf FluttershyLabeouf
    18-21, M
    Apr 12
    obviously I will never be helped on this site
    anniegagnon anniegagnon
    36-40, F
    1 Response Apr 11
    My insecurities always seem to ruin a good thing. I wish people could understand me. I can't always give you what you want, when you want it and I feel bad. I feel I'm not good...
    lovesthenightsky lovesthenightsky
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Apr 11
    I have no limits or moral message me
    LittleSlut666 LittleSlut666
    22-25, F
    13 Responses Apr 11
    preferably a little girl but I would suck a little boy if that was the case
    penisishard4yng penisishard4yng
    26-30, M
    3 Responses Apr 11
    why was even concived? what was the purpose of my being born? to be abused by parents that didn't want me.to be a laughing stock for my other siblings. to be be hated by every...
    wolfserpent wolfserpent
    56-60, M
    2 Responses Apr 11
    I don't know if it's love but I know for sure that I'll be sad when it'll end .
    black08cat black08cat
    70+, F
    Apr 10
    (I refer this to Christians going through TRIALS or/and TEMPTATIONS, lest a fellow wishes to wrongly counter the write-up) Dear Christians and whomever this may concern, God...
    Lincoln98 Lincoln98
    16-17, M
    Apr 10
    (I refer this to Christians going through TRIALS or/and TEMPTATIONS, lest a fellow wishes to wrongly counter the write-up) Dear Christians and whomever this may concern, God...
    Lincoln98 Lincoln98
    16-17, M
    2 Responses Apr 10
    I am sure there are guys that tell her they love her every where she goes. I am reminded of that constantly here by one of them many many times and i am sure he will many more...
    boldtimer boldtimer
    66-70, M
    Apr 9
More Stories