I Feel Like I'm Surrounded By Zombies

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 110 People

    Today's Zombie 3/14/10

      (backdated) The guy at the parts counter didn't know under which category to look for the part I wanted.  When I told him, he commented that he hadn't done it in a while.  However, this is not something you forget.  It is a very common part...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    Mar 15, 2010

    Stupid Smart People

      What is the most important goal in life? To be happy. To be happy, you do things that make you happy - that could be making money, helping others, etc. A "smart" person is included in all people - all people want to be happy. Smart people want to be happy. Do smart people...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    4 Responses Feb 6, 2010
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    Apr 29, 2010

    Cute Little Zombettes

    You'll see them on the playgrounds yelling, "Let's do this! Follow me!".  Every fire of every synapse of their little zombie brains is a strategically focused effort to gain attention and fuel the narcissistic tendencies of their species. Their little minds grasp...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    Dec 29, 2009

    Democrats, Republicans, Independents.

    They are tricked by their own insecurities. They choose the "lesser of two evils" and are proud of their choice in dysfunctional candidates. Notice me. Heed what I say. I know who's better. I am zombie. Here me babble.
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    2 Responses Sep 13, 2009

    Strong Zombies Are Often A Paradox

    Their claims of happiness are riddled with cues of misery.
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    2 Responses Dec 2, 2009
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    2 Responses Dec 4, 2009

    Memory Of Jokes Past.

    Facade's post "Today's Zombie 5/6/10" reminds me of a Farside-esque cartoon a coworker showed in the mid-eighties.  It was entitled "Advanced Management Training" and showed a man in glasses and labcoat with a stick pointer.  To either of side was an easel.  The...
    CorazonVacio CorazonVacio
    46-50, M
    May 6, 2010

    Everyone belongs to different clusters of boxes

    and I'm just standing there in my combat boots pondering if I should try to break them or go about on my own.
    c4mila c4mila
    16-17, F
    1 Response Jan 28, 2014

    Today's Zombie 3/9/2010

      (backdated) I was waiting to pick up my child from school and a guy comes walking out with his little bucket full of fertilizer.  He proceeds to fertilize a bare dirt spot.  I think to myself, ok, maybe he's just hoping some grass might catch on and grow...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    2 Responses Mar 11, 2010

    People

    I do not, and do not want to, understand people. I know I am a person, and I will admit I never understood myself. I would like to file a complaint to god for making us so complex, but no he "made us in his image" therefore he's a person too. I might as well give up on...
    vinceman7 vinceman7
    16-17, M
    Mar 25, 2010

    Sheeple.

    I have always called them that.  This group's icon expresses my worldview more eloquently than anything I can write.  My greatest fear is that I am becomming infected by the zombie contagion.  It's so ******* virulent. 
    CorazonVacio CorazonVacio
    46-50, M
    8 Responses May 6, 2010

    They Reach That Plateau

      Even the relatively insightful zombie will reach that plateau where they'll just run out of insight.  Like a vehicle with a set of inappropriately low gears, they'll sprint to a certain speed with quickness then top out at 80 mph.  Just a hair above the speed...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    1 Response Apr 30, 2010

    Broken Gestalt

      They learn the intricate details of one aspect of the system, then proceed to claim knowledge of the entire system. This is contradictory to everything knowledge teaches - that the more you learn, the more you realize you do not know.  The strong zombie misses this...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    Feb 7, 2010

    The Grudge Girl

      I keep seeing these young girls.  They look exactly the same.  The slightly elliptical eyes, relatively large, the rounded, protruding nose, the small mouth, small chin.  The head is elliptical as well, narrow towards the bottom.    ...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    1 Response Mar 29, 2010

    The Degrees Of Ignorance

      1st degree ignorance: You're ignorant and you know it.  Most sane, stable, fairly smart people fall into this category. 2nd degree ignorance: You're ingorant and are more or less oblivious to that fact.  A babbling fool, you are.  The 'ignorance is...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    Feb 22, 2010

    When I was working in box (at the movie

    theater), my co worker was joking with me saying how customers are like zombies since they always come out of nowhere and before you know it there's a horde of them. So at one point during the night we were pretending to shoot them down lol.
    jenni234 jenni234
    22-25, F
    3 Responses Oct 11, 2014

    Zombies Always Agree.

    ... with each other's like viewpoints. One can say the sky is flourescent green and if the speaker and audience share like viewpoints, they'll all believe each other and praise each other's works. The critical analysis of literature is completely abandoned. All that matters to...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    4 Responses Sep 24, 2009

    Categorized

    They pretty much all fit into one of a few groups.  Stunning similarities, they just aren't very different at all.  Same thoughts, same personalities, same beliefs, same actions down to the very cliches they repeat and pets they prefer. "Seen one, seen them all...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    2 Responses Jan 6, 2010

    Today's Zombie 5/6/10

      I'm sitting at the Burger King eating garbage.  He walks in with a younger coworker, clearly under his supervision.  They order, sit and start talking.  The older man starts complaining to his subordinate that another coworker is constantly late and how...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    1 Response May 6, 2010

    I See Faces

    with no expression, Their smile never reach the corner of their eyes, I see hearts with no affection, they have a pulse, but it's always steady, with no raise and fall
    LordVoldemort LordVoldemort
    36-40, F
    9 Responses May 1, 2010

    Void Creates Vacuum

    When things are missing, the void left will create a vacuum.  This vacuum is unselective in what it sucks in to fill the void.  Meaningless things will be sucked into the void.
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    Feb 9, 2010

    They Drag Their Corpses Around Performing Ritualistic Acts.

    ... but they don't pay attention to anything.  If you watch closely, you'll realize that nothing they do makes sense. Oftentimes, you will see bizarre behavior that defies logical explanation. They create and watch TV commercials that make no sense. They pull out in...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    11 Responses Aug 27, 2009

    This Town

    This town,It's full of 'em,Zombies,They wander around, In their own little way, You never know,What to think!
    cndrewdrvr8 cndrewdrvr8
    46-50, M
    Sep 3, 2011

    Mediocre Skills Are Beyond Their Comprehension

    I get so tired of being told I need help doing something, or that some project requires x number of people, "it's too much for one person", etc. The truth of the matter is that the task would be done much more thoroughly and efficiently if I were to do it myself with no one else...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    Jul 12, 2010

    The (Steam) Chaos Experiment

      If you watched it, you'll find the current behavior on this site entertaining.
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    Feb 9, 2010

    The Types Of Zombies

      Weak - "mopey", typically slow moving, melancholy, "goes with the flow", causes no conflict, intellectual potential very low IE: "Pagan", self-harmer, iPod fanatic, "Goth", "Emo", "metrosexual", watches reality TV, NASCAR fan   Strong - very opinionated...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    3 Responses Feb 15, 2010

    Really? It's Only 30 F$&@$& Pounds!!

    Today I bought a sewing machine for my wife. She is learning to quilt, did her homework, and found one in the area. I was doing my normal 12 mile hike up a mountain, down the mountain, and then back over. I'm 6' tall weigh about 160. When I purchased it the salesman asked me...
    Emichael Emichael
    41-45, M
    Jun 23, 2012

    Gotta Have Their Morning Coffee.

    Zombie wants his coffee... zombie goes outside to smoke 10 times a day... zombie is a good zombie and celebrates by having a drink. Zombie deserves a break. Zombie is a proud zombie. See zombie's traits. Admire them. Zombie is a cool conformist.
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    3 Responses Sep 10, 2009

    Conformist

    The conformist declares, "Mainstream music is no good."  
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    2 Responses Jan 31, 2010

    Their "circle" Gives Them Away.

    They say "even a blind squirrel finds a nut sometimes". So goes it with the words that come out of the zombie's mouth. Careful that you do not misclassify a zombie based on one or two sentences that appeal to your philosophies. There are 'strong zombies' that are very...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    Nov 20, 2009

    Today's Zombie 4/21/10

      As I'm leaving my neighborhood, I come upon a car.  He approaches an intersection.  He has no stop sign; the other road does.  As he enters the middle of the intersection, he looks to his right to see if anyone is coming.  
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    1 Response Apr 21, 2010

    I Need To Share This...

    ...because I'm getting to the point where I just don't know what to think anymore. I went to a big time bookstore today, and all I wanted was Shakespeare's Othello. I'm familiar with the place and the usual lack of interest and even plain manners by its employees. But this time...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    4 Responses Feb 10, 2010

    Mass Produced Zombie

    The cat-loving "pagan" narcissist.  She's gunna be a witch. 
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    1 Response Jan 4, 2010

    And...

    And they come in the form of an apathetic society...
    bubblegum84 bubblegum84
    26-30, F
    6 Responses Jan 5, 2010

    Today's Zombie 3/11/2010

      !'m at the grocery store and see this lady approaching.  I stop, waiting for her to pass.  She stops dead in front of me.  
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    1 Response Mar 11, 2010

    Drive N' Point

      They are typically driving far below the speed limit with a passenger.  You see their fingers pointing all which ways, their hands motioning here and there.  The point and shake, the holding of the hand up sideways.  There is no particular building...
    fascad3 fascad3
    36-40, M
    4 Responses Mar 29, 2010

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