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I Find Myself In a Cycle That I Need to Break

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 187 People

    And Who Doesn't?

    We all find ourselves in this point at some moment of our lives... Sometimes you dont really know why (specially at the beggining) but in the end... there's this little thing... sometimes a secret... that just needs to be told so we can be free        ...
    wonttell wonttell 22-25 Jul 20, 2008

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    A Bad Romance

    It seems I'm with a guy that will love love love me and then go back to his baby mama. We go through this cycle of him being nice, getting distant, deciding he wants to be with no one, taking me back, making things up to me, and then it starts all over again. I guess the...
    joeysemtex joeysemtex 18-21, F Apr 12, 2010

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    I am stuck in a stupid pointless unfeeling

    relationship that is ruining every good part of me. I love my girlfriend but we dont have much in common we dont have sex and i doubt shes attracted to me we rarly communicate and i know im missing somthing great right now settling for her. So why am i still with her? Habits...
    StormOokami StormOokami 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 24

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    From Each Day A New Beginning

    A woman who has no way of expressing herself and of realizing herself as a full human has nothing else to turn to but the owning of material things. —Enriqueta Longeaux y Vasquez Each of us struggling with these Twelve Steps is finding self-expression and self-definition...
    zeeva70 zeeva70 41-45, F Oct 15, 2013

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    Ehm

    Depression.I need to break the cycle.*throws depression into a puddle**puts on rain boots and goes back to pick depression up**decides to throw depression into the ocean**hopes that depression burns in the pits of hell*:D
    CrazyHippieChick CrazyHippieChick 22-25, F 2 Responses Sep 19, 2011

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    Computer

    I need to get it out. Mind feels clouded. I waste my days off . I need to clean my room, I run off to work everyday. I feel most energetic to get something done before I must go to work. I feel spiritual when I am on EP. I listen to my music. Someone, please, I just thought it...
    NateGreat4 NateGreat4 31-35, M Oct 6, 2011

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    Broke the Mold

    Finally Stepped outside the Cycle. Been happy going on two weeks now. Nothing Can change that. Once you Say no more Put your foot down. Walk to the light. Open your heart and begin to shine. You Find that Cycle Breaking. I am happy with my choices now.. Next Keep Pushing no...
    matthewsmommy matthewsmommy 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 8, 2008

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    The Big Circle

    I had a huge revelation recently and I am caught up in a cycle that has to stop. I am extremely hard on myself and talk negatively daily. Done it as far back as I can remember and it's going to stop. Hard to catch myself sometimes but making a concerted effort to stop it...
    VoteForPedro VoteForPedro 51-55, F Jul 9, 2012

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    Strike Three...not Looking For #4....

    I guess my story starts when I was married to my first husband....he was abusive and not grown up yet. We loved each other alot but things just got really bad fast...he cheated, we fought then my daughter came into the picture. To make a long story short things happened and I...
    truetomyself truetomyself 46-50, F 4 Responses Aug 30, 2011

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    Since I'm not on school right now,

    not working, and all my friends are busy these days, I haven't been doing much of anything at all lately. It's just been a cycle of eating, sleeping, and Internet surfing. The break was nice at first, but now it's just depressing. And after lazing about so much, I can't find...
    almaera almaera 18-21, F Apr 24

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    I Guess Im Stuck In the Middle

    im stuck in a cycle of demanding friendships and emotional leaches, i find it hard to find time to myself, i try to make more time, its a sort of guilt for no being enough, for not being more available, i am steadily breaking free though, little by little
    Donalh Donalh 22-25, M 1 Response Jun 8, 2008

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    I was doing a photo edit (because sometimes

    that's my only real way to be myself in life). And I labeled it with one of my favorite quotes. "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results each time". Albert Einstein Man was truly smart on so many levels. And this is so true.
    lu7998 lu7998 31-35, F May 2

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    If We Do Not We Are Perfect ..... Not

    There are many cycles to break out of ... right now I am drinking to much beer and smoking to much. Sometimes the cycles just creep up on me and it takes some time to realize. I believe no one is perfect and its only denial that can hurt us. If we take the time to examine, I...
    francis28340 francis28340 61-65, M May 18, 2008

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    Theycallherelly Theycallherelly 13-15, F 1 Response May 2

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    I think this speaks for it's self.

    N 14 years I have been married and up and down up and down. But hey is it bad or is it for the kids or is it because it is what has to be done?
    lu7998 lu7998 31-35, F 1 Response Apr 24

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    My Current Life

    Ok here it is, my life is kinda dull right now. I'll start off with my job. I'm a landscaper and it's alot harder than you might think. I have a TON of stress from my job due to the fact that I get ragged on most of the time for stupid mistakes and I'm usually the one to get in...
    Hopelessinjersey Hopelessinjersey 22-25, M Sep 13, 2009

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    Random

    So some days it's like the world is at my feet. But that's only when I get what I want. There is this vicious cycle I'm afraid i've created for myself. I hate to be alone, I think. At times I'm totally comfortable being alone. But At times I just want an escape. I...
    huggsnkissezz huggsnkissezz 18-21 1 Response Feb 18, 2009

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    Related Experiences

    I'm trying to find my own version of happiness and a life that feels right for me. I have so many sides of me I'm trying to fit all together. I consider myself relatively traveled...
    ajrestless ajrestless 18-21, F Aug 28

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    Im just all over the place right now. I recently divorce And now im trying to find my happiness and figure out what will truely make me happy as far as moving to a new state and...
    alycia12 alycia12 26-30, F Sep 9

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    I'm finding it quite hard and I'm not sure why.
    yennafur yennafur 22-25, F Sep 14

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    which results in me hating myself even more.
    ohwritteninthestars ohwritteninthestars 16-17, F 1 Response 20 hrs ago

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    If most of us remain ignorant of ourselves, it is because self-knowledge is painful and we prefer the pleasures of illusion.
    Brandnue Brandnue 31-35, F 3 Responses Aug 26

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    I rarely add men to my friends list....
    emeraldtriangle420 emeraldtriangle420 22-25, F 27 Responses Sep 11

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    I spent all summer depressed thinking I'm alone in this world my family seemed to grow farther apart from me I was starting my second year of college scared I would not have...
    kintobeans kintobeans 22-25, M 6 days ago

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    I'm starting to be more attracted to girls 😮. Females can turn me on now. Gosh, I'm gay.
    jeaaane jeaaane 13-15, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    Looming thought's yet to be processed have me considering ideas that shouldn't Why do these happen I don't know, my understanding is just that from where I sit I dwell On the...
    PoeticMute PoeticMute 31-35, M 5 days ago

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    August 31. Denial. I've been recovering many years. I've used denial many times. It has been a defense, a survival device, a coping behavior, and, at times, almost my undoing. It...
    zeeva70 zeeva70 41-45, F Aug 31

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    August 31. Denial. I've been recovering many years. I've used denial many times. It has been a defense, a survival device, a coping behavior, and, at times, almost my undoing. It...
    zeeva70 zeeva70 41-45, F Aug 31

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    Today I went for a swim at my local lake. As I jumped into the water with enthusiasm, I was determined to swim to the little island far off in distance. I paddled and paddled and I...
    BLVLFreeSwim BLVLFreeSwim 16-17, F 1 Response Sep 1

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    I have no more feelings left inside of me. I fell in love with a great person once. It was beautiful. Young love always feels amazing but it was an extremely controlling...
    Zari93 Zari93 18-21 2 Responses Sep 8

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    On some levels I'm mature for my age, on others I still have a lot of work to do. I avoid certain people and situations that cause me discomfort and tension. I have to learn to...
    ajrestless ajrestless 18-21, F Aug 31

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    Seems to happen time and time again. I am inlove with the most wonderful man but the long distance makes it so hard. My mistake was to build my life around around our relationship...
    nicoleACA nicoleACA 22-25, F Sep 1

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    I want to start off by saying, I love this group name. It fits my situation perfectly. I used to be such a creative, artistic, expressive person. I had a 600+ page role-play going...
    rollingdoro rollingdoro 22-25, F 1 Response a week ago

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    There is so much that can be said but I will boil it down to this... the life I thought I was building for myself seemed to come apart at the seams in a very short period of time...
    LestatdeLioncourt LestatdeLioncourt 31-35, M 5 days ago

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    Short summary of a much larger situation. Married 15 years, kids, wonderful times together as family. Now work creeping into the evenings for both of us. Meanwhile kids start...
    jeepin54321 jeepin54321 36-40, M 8 Responses Aug 25

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    I feel like this is my worst character trait and it makes me feel like a real freak. I'm not sure if it was because of my rape at 14.. Or if it's because years later after the rape...
    SubmissiveSecrets SubmissiveSecrets 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 26

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    I love to draw. As a kid, I've always wanted to be a graphic novelist (or a mangaka). Being influenced by anime and Japanese culture at a young age, I knew that I wanted to live in...
    katsudonkyojin katsudonkyojin 18-21, M 1 Response Aug 30

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    I just need time for myself. Everything is just making me overwhelmed with life. Got school, then family, the whole moving from another place, Theater, and there are just people...
    Wewerethereinthattime Wewerethereinthattime 18-21, F Sep 1

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    It's been a long time since I've really felt whole. I find myself looking for live in people I wish where right for me. I know deep down they're a poison and I'm slowly killing...
    Earthchildx Earthchildx 16-17, F 1 Response Sep 5

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    It makes no difference the state of mind I find myself in For everything points to a rather lonely existance I adapt as best I can to be who I want within my limitations Yet...
    PoeticMute PoeticMute 31-35, M 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    I don't understand. I just came back home from my best friend's wedding and guess what? I cried my eyes out and was very upset and miserable, despite the fact that I had great fun...
    PersonInCrisis PersonInCrisis 31-35, F 2 Responses Aug 28

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    I'm disabled and home alone day after day. Is there anyone else in my age group that is in a similar situation? I just joined EP and I was hoping I might find someone that is home...
    lookn4luv lookn4luv 51-55, F 5 Responses Sep 2

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    I'm finding myself with fewer and fewer people to speak to in reality so I figured I'd post something here. I don't think I've ever felt as lonely, confused or just lost as I do as...
    thenewboy87 thenewboy87 22-25, M 5 Responses Sep 2

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    My husband is a great man and an all around great catch he is a hard working war hero and good father. But but but he has a 4" penis the man I was with before him was nearly 10...
    killakelley killakelley 26-30, F 18 Responses Sep 6

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    Always analyzing my thoughts and actions, and consistently finding ways to improve, along with asking others' advice on my current improvements. I am always open to hearing...
    JaidIsAWildflower JaidIsAWildflower 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 8

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    I've always preferred listening. I do well with friends who love to talk because it allows me to simply listen and say very little. I do a great deal of talking to my son...
    thescarletibis thescarletibis 41-45, F 1 Response Sep 11

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    A lot of time I find myself wanting to talk but unable to talk to close friends or family for fear of tainting relationships which is why I come to EP. That being said, I'm always...
    katzbrow katzbrow 26-30, F 4 Responses Sep 15

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    i find myself calling my uncles phone just to hear his voice. but he's dead and he's never going to hear these messages i leave him. i've left him so many messages these pass week...
    brown2306 brown2306 16-17, F 7 Responses a week ago

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    I am a 16 year old girl. I have been raised as a Catholic Christian, but I find myself being drawn into Scientology. Can Somebody please explain to me what I should do?????!?!?
    confusedteenager34 confusedteenager34 16-17 2 Responses 5 days ago