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I Force Myself to Eat

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 139 People

    My eating disorder

    I have something called EDNOS. It is an acronym for "eating disorder not otherwise specified". Mine is closely related to binge eating disorder, but not exactly. I do it because my whole life I have been underweight and my highest weight has been 108 pounds or 7 stone 10 pounds...
    nomeatforshrimp nomeatforshrimp 16-17, F Jul 21, 2012

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    Can't Ep and Eat

    This is not the real story. This is just a recent phenomenon since i began to EP 9 days (?can i even remember?) ago. I immediately became addicted to EP, the first time I used it. I cannot face eating anything during or after EP sessions. I feel sick quite a...
    TheLuckyHobo TheLuckyHobo 31-35, M 4 Responses Jan 28, 2009

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    My Weekend Plan

    Two days off and even if I'm full to bursting I am simply going to force myself to keep eating the whole time so that I can gain about 14lbs in two days.  I know my feeder will help me get the food down and take care of me but I simply want this big push to get some fat on...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Aug 20, 2010

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    Food

    I haven't willing ate food in months. I always feel sick afterwards no matter how much or little I eat. So I make myself eat food. And it sucks. And I don't know what t do. Arg.
    SCChick1990 SCChick1990 18-21, F Jan 26, 2009

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    I force myself to eat.

    Not because I wouldn't eat if I didn't, because I would. And not because I need to gain weight, because I don't. I force myself to eat because it is something I can control. I've never been in control of my life, but it's always been easy for me to control what I could eat. So I...
    tRueInSAnItY tRueInSAnItY 16-17, F Sep 3, 2014

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    Don't Stop!!

    I was overboard eating so much my arms began to look bigger than my friend Nadia's giant 40'' hulk arms..I was overcompensating for last nite when I didn't eat my 100k cals like I chow down on like a piggie I'm getting so fat my belly reaches below my knees and made me fall and...
    bigbootygirl3 bigbootygirl3 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 7, 2013

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    I Like Food

    Really I do, its just that I generally don't have much of an appetite. I can go an entire day (including a visit to the gym) without feeling the need to eat. I also tend to prioritize work/school/writing over sitting down for a meal....its far too easy for me to get into what I'm...
    vinividivici21 vinividivici21 22-25, F 5 Responses Jan 26, 2009

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    LoverOfAllSouls LoverOfAllSouls 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 9, 2014

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    Related Experiences

    Just because I'm being forced to eat doesn't mean I'm "better".
    jackjack600 jackjack600 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 11

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    Idk why but I always find myself eating. I cant get enough its so good!!!!! I'm just glad i don't gain weight i would probably be extremely over weight if i did. So food you just...
    PurpleLove18 PurpleLove18 16-17, F Jan 5

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    More than anything in this existence. "What could be So bad about you?" don't ask me that, you shouldn't ask me that, very annoying. I take everything out on myself because I feel...
    Britt4ny Britt4ny 70+, F 1 Response 17 hrs ago

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    Honestly, the feeling is equal to cvmming. It's my fxtish and stress reliever. As I'm listening to music I look down at my wrist and notice one burn is much smaller than the others...
    Britt4ny Britt4ny 70+, F 15 hrs ago

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    I have been eating 5000 calories a day for the last 2 weeks and have gained a few pounds. On top of the 65 lbs I have gained in the last few years. I just cant stop eating and dont...
    person12670 person12670 31-35, M 3 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    I'm home alone for the weekend, give me some really crazy ideas, I'm into anything that doesn't involve eating it, but I want to do some really out of the box, something I haven't...
    bluesmartie bluesmartie 16-17, M 5 hrs ago

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    “Picky Eater” was my title. It was what I hid behind. It made it easy for me to say, “No thanks, I don’t eat that. I’m probably the pickiest eater you’ll ever meet...
    jackylamenzo jackylamenzo 22-25, F Jan 22

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    I ate too much today :( had a piece of chicken, a small cookie, a can of tuna with some kidney beans, an icecream and then dinner... I feel like I missed something out though...
    catho catho 18-21, F 16 hrs ago

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    Cool little chart I downloaded for my daughter. So she knows what part of the cow she is eating, lol
    JennyTom JennyTom 36-40, F 5 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    I'm been smoking and it makes me cough so bad that I throw up I love it only eating protein smoothie for breakfast and protein bars for lunch and dinner.
    Banabear Banabear 18-21, F 5 hrs ago

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    I've always had weight issues and struggled with wanting to be thinner. In Mid October of 2014 I was 5'5 138 pounds. I was prescribed adderall for add, I began to see I didn't eat...
    mjglynn mjglynn 13-15, F Jan 6

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    I've struggled with my weight most of my life. I'm really short, and it almost seems like I put on weight if I just look at too many cupcakes. I can drop about 30 lbs if I stick...
    justsomegirloutthere89 justsomegirloutthere89 22-25, F Jan 7

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    ive been diagnosed with depression and wow I just feel so fat. I often get the urge to go bulimic when im angry because im angry at myself and im a ******* fat *** and I just want...
    idkhby idkhby 13-15, F Dec 30, 2014

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    I have a habit of starving myself, it's like I can't eat until my hands turn purple, or I don't eat until I feel sick. Other girls my age can just eat and eat, I could do that also...
    jeyhere jeyhere 13-15, F 1 Response Jan 10

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    Comment food that I need to eat and I'll make sure I'll eat it.
    Skinnytofat Skinnytofat 16-17, F 8 Responses Jan 17

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    Self Reflections My skin is not a tough armor, its too thin and easily broken. The air i am inhaling is attenuating with each gasp for breath. My shins are quivering and small...
    writingmyrelease writingmyrelease 26-30, F 1 Response 11 hrs ago

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    I've been feeling like this recently. Some days I'll be hopeful and confident with myself. I'll set goals, try to be more productive, and make plans for the future. But yesterday...
    christarose96 christarose96 18-21, F 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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    For all my life, I was known as the picky eater. The one who ate the kid’s menu diet long after I passed that fine print point of “for children 10 and under.” The one who had...
    jackylamenzo jackylamenzo 22-25, F Jan 22

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    I am 177cm and 45 kg and has been suffering with anorexia for 3 years. I didn't start full out "starving" myself. Actually it started out as an innocent diet (exercising, eating...
    Horse10202 Horse10202 18-21, F 3 Responses Jan 3

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    I'm not sure if its an eating disorder or not but this is what happens: 90% of the time I'm not hungry and i rarely eat not because I'm punishing myself but I just don't feel like...
    LilahWolf LilahWolf 16-17, F 1 Response Jan 5

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    maybe against would be a strong word, but i dont agree with force arranged marriage. what i feel more painful however is the fact that... for children who love their parents, they...
    butterfliesndut butterfliesndut 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 21

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    10 years ago I chose to live. 10 years ago I was at my lowest point of my life. I was barely 78lbs at 5'4. I was suffering from a major illness very few people discuss with...
    Emilyleahywho Emilyleahywho 26-30, F 2 Responses Jan 3

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    I'm skinny, but recently I've been gaining weight due to eating unhealthy stuff and eating a lot due to stress. I recently visited my older sister and she slapped me on my thighs...
    laubrown1 laubrown1 18-21, F Jan 4

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    When I feel depressed the thought of eating sickens me. If I am severely depressed I could starve myself for days on end up to a week, instead I drink up to 4 V cans a day (a drink...
    WokenandOpen WokenandOpen 31-35, M 1 Response Jan 9

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    Where do I even begin? I've always loved breakfast and yet I am not a morning person at all. This ended up making breakfast quite illusive in my youth. During the school week I...
    Sapphire89 Sapphire89 22-25 4 Responses 4 days ago

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    I've talked to myself ever since I can remember... it's how I fall asleep at night. I like to place myself as a character into my favorite sci-fi of the time and just act out...
    emilyannie emilyannie 18-21, F 18 hrs ago

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    So the other day I was at olive garden for my brothers birthday and we were having a great time with his friends but I while I was having fun I was forgetting that I really had to...
    NapalmNinja NapalmNinja 18-21, F 7 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    I was born with a gift. Sounds like a blessing, right? But in some ways it is a curse. I've called myself a monster for so many times. I feel like Elsa from Frozen, and its no...
    Seaspiritaria Seaspiritaria 13-15, F 3 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    I think it every day and it honestly sucks. I want to learn to love myself it's just hard to think of good things about myself.
    Allieyo Allieyo 16-17, F 3 hrs ago

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    I've barely eaten all day.. Yet I'm staring at my dinner and I don't want to eat... :/ There's not even much of it.. And it's healthy.. But I'm struggling to bring myself to eat...
    catho catho 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 4

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    6months ago i cut out bread, rice, tortillas, fries, chips, etc, lost 40lbs. I was already getting back in shape and going to the gym regularly but couldnt sink below 200lbs. I...
    seekjoy seekjoy 31-35, M Jan 6

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    I'm skinny, but recently I've been gaining weight due to eating unhealthy stuff and eating a lot due to stress. I recently visited my older sister and she slapped me on my thighs...
    laubrown1 laubrown1 18-21, F 3 Responses Jan 15

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    I feel so terrible. I was confident this week so I ate a lot and now I just hate myself for eating so much. I didn't even eat that much. I ate the recommended amount of calories...
    whatsupgirly whatsupgirly 16-17, F 2 Responses Jan 22

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    Last year was a game changer for me..i left my boyfriend of five years last February. It was difficult to do but I don't regret it. It took me over a year to work up the courage...
    lambkin lambkin 26-30, F 4 Responses Jan 6

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    Every time I see food it just makes me want to cry and throw up. After u eat I want to make myself sick. The only thing stopping me is myself. But the feelings are getting stronger...
    mickey123xp mickey123xp 13-15, F 2 Responses Dec 30, 2014

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    I always dress myself up whenever I get the courage to and when I do I'm always alone. I just want someone to turn me into a woman and force me to do everything a woman would do.
    xfusion xfusion 22-25 Jan 4

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    I have been trying to "pick myself up by my bootstraps" as folks have a REAL affinity for saying. It is going pretty well, although I am still having my hardships. It seems like...
    milehighHeartbreak milehighHeartbreak 31-35, M 2 Responses Jan 5

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