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I Get a Big Kick Out of Grammatically Impossible Experiences

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 9 People

    I got kicked out of a bar just because the I hit the ceiling with my umbrella. The ceiling had some decorative ornaments and the bar tender did not like it. I showed up the next...
    Noology19 Noology19 26-30 May 12

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    So at 32 years old I returned to college, I wanted to gain some new qualifications to better my career options. Well what can I say other than kids, teens, students, gangstas...
    Richard369 Richard369 31-35, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    My father-- my own father kicked me out of the house... I am truly depressed and torn, life more has no meaning... he just gave up... he gave up on me... I have a friend that I'll...
    Brittan1998 Brittan1998 16-17, F 1 Response 2 hrs ago

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    it is impossible to live with my dad, and horrible living with my mum. i have been trying to move out for a year now. my room is all packed up and im ready to go. i might have a...
    butterflykisses11 butterflykisses11 16-17, F May 15

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    Being in college has really pushed my mental health limits. The thought of having to go back to school is putting me near tears. I just feel so lost because I know I'm not doing...
    withano withano 18-21, F 2 Responses May 13

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    It is impossible to beat Chuck Norris in soccer because when he roundhouse kicks the ball, everything in its path gets distroyed.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses May 11

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    I want to have the large crazy family on the block. You know the house where there's always something going on? The baseball game out in the yard, maybe tag or some other running...
    Jjamison45 Jjamison45 26-30, M 6 hrs ago

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    Ok. This may sound trite, but it's a big deal for me. I'm going to cancel my cable tv this week. Big whoop, right? Well, yeah, it is. For one, I'm going to save a helluva lot...
    angsty angsty 61-65, F 3 Responses May 9

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    Today is not a good day for me... I feel incredibly overwhelmed...I'm avoiding my twin flame right now, which I feel really guilty about. But I am scared. I am terrified!!! Not...
    ERMAHGERD1 ERMAHGERD1 22-25, F 1 Response May 13

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    Energy bar grasped by invisible force at work? May 21 2015, 5:43 a.m. 5:43 a.m this morning at work in staff office. I sat at the desk, drinking a cup of coffee. I stood up and...
    shaandar shaandar 31-35, F 2 Responses May 21

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    Chuck Norris stole Christmas back from the Grinch and made his heart 4 sizes bigger with a roundhouse kick.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    Comfortable N_de I am a life long nudist who has never quite seen the point in clothes .They are restricting and uncomfortable I am comfortable in my skin and comfortable being...
    nakednudist nakednudist 46-50, M May 13

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    HELP!!!!! I am so close to death..... me and my gf had sex...... we cant do this...... I have no money..... I cant tell my mom cuz she will kick me out..... her family hates me...
    jdog2012 jdog2012 18-21, M May 20

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    I LOVE going back and fourth between Buffalo and my town! But I get a kick frm goin to my cabin in the country where nothing is around to my hometown which is filled with...
    DML2451 DML2451 22-25, M 1 Response May 8

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    It's kind fun to do the IMPOSSIBLE.(Walt Disney)
    NikkiCOCO NikkiCOCO 16-17, F May 14

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    I have been on here for a long time, but I never posted anything. I don't know why. I mean I give advice and try to help out but I never put experiences out there. I think I will...
    mmanuel69 mmanuel69 16-17, M 6 days ago

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    I have the "mature" content filters on, but of course they have their limitations. I would prefer not to have to entirely block people in order not to see their adult content...
    notmindfulenough notmindfulenough 36-40, F May 9

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    I am a n-dist through choice and alot of my experiences have an adult theme which EP censorship dont like . How ever all my experiences are true and dont regret a single one .
    nakednudist nakednudist 46-50, M 6 Responses May 11

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    If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always answers "Two seconds till". After you ask "Two seconds to what?", he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses May 3

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    Chuck Norris chopped a tree down with a roundhouse kick
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses May 6

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    Team Rocket once attempted to steal Chuck Norris' Pikachu; they were immediately roundhouse kicked by Chuck before they lay a finger on Pikachu.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses May 7

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    Chuck Norris was once asked to play rock, paper, scissors. When he learned a roundhouse kick was not an option, he immedietly decapitated everyone.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 3 Responses May 8

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    Chuck Norris doesn't teach Chun Kuk Do. He roundhouse-kick's the Info you need to learn it.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses May 10

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    Rainbows are what happens when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks Richard Simmons.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses May 12

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    I got kicked in the balls once and then went purple
    jburman15 jburman15 13-15, M May 15

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    First, there was nothing. Then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it in the face and told it to get a job.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses May 15

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    Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a tree. Linkin Logs were created.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses May 15

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    The asteroid belt was once a planet,but that's before Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 3 Responses May 16

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    There is no use hiding in the backyard when Chuck Norris visits, he can still kill you from the porch since his kicks are 'roundhouse'.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses May 18

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    Power plants are run by a single Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses May 20

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    Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kicked the earth a billion years ago, its still spinning.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    Oscar the Grouch didn't always live in a trash can. He owed Chuck Norris money but didn't pay and Chuck roundhouse kicked his dumpster.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked white light into what we know as the visible spectrum.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick is what makes Santa's reindeer fly.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Chuck Norris destroyed Route 66 because the only place you're allowed to get your kicks from is from Chuck Norris.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Love getting a good work out in. Nothing like kicking some cardio ***. If only my headphones could completely drown out the grunting noises some of the guys make, cuz it's kinda...
    HarleyQuinn251 HarleyQuinn251 31-35, F 2 Responses Apr 30

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    A couple days ago I had sex. For those who have read my other experiences you'll know I was raped in the past. I thought I would have never have been able to be close with someone...
    Secrets27 Secrets27 13-15, F 4 Responses May 3

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    I do .. my rule is If u r not part of my happiness u r not part of my life. If u used to be but not anymore I won't histate to kick u out of my life. I cut all ties wth my friend...
    candles700 candles700 22-25, F 1 Response May 4

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    All my dad's family are toxic. I am not sure why but in the end it only makes me sad that they live like this. It's all they know, to be filled with such limited experiences and...
    wingeyes wingeyes 31-35, F 1 Response May 5

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    Well, I basically did! I had a family party to go to and last time I saw my family, I was told that I needed to get bigger. At 270 pounds then, and 275 pounds now, I am still...
    fatjigglebelly fatjigglebelly 18-21, F 1 Response May 6

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    feather weight touch on leg and strange hand written message on card: a mere coincidence?Last night at work, tired and exhausted, sitting on an arm chair, I sat back in the chair...
    shaandar shaandar 31-35, F 2 Responses May 7

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