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I Got Out of a Relationship With a Narcissist

Free support from people who understand! 432 People

    Starting Over: Why Losing Him Helped Me Find Myself

        I knew it was time to go. I had known for quite some time. What started out as a fairytale relationship, full of excitement and promise, quickly turned into a nightmare I simply could not bear any longer. But, leaving isn't always easy to do. Remnants of hope swirled in my...
    MissConstrued MissConstrued 46-50, F 11 Responses Apr 28, 2013

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    Most selfish, egotistical,

    narcissisting man I've ever come in contact with. 15 years of marriage, and he had me so brainwashed, I didn't even know he was like that until our 12th year. He would lie in bed for 3 weeks at a time, and I had to cater to him, as did our son. And, no saying "just a minute...
    aaaagggghhhh aaaagggghhhh 36-40, F 4 Responses Jan 25

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    Living With Dr. Jekyll And Mr. Hyde

    My husband of 5 1/2 years (I left him 4 weeks ago and already filed for divorce) has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. It was like living with Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. He was Mr. Wonderful at the beginning and swept me off my feet. He was caring, loving, attentive, charming...
    ReikiGirl62 ReikiGirl62 51-55, F 4 Responses Aug 8, 2013

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    Wow 2014 has become a transformation year.

    .. In just a month it seems like my life has change... I got out of a narcissist relationship, in which I wasted 10 yrs of my life. Still healing but thank God he hasn't contacted me and I sure ain't contacting him... And I just found out I am being promoted as thee supervisor of...
    luv0105 luv0105 41-45, F 3 Responses Jan 30

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    Selfish, Deceptive, And Manipulative

    Stbx was a wicked witch in disguise. When we first dated, she created an "illusional girl" that I fell in love with. I held firmly onto this false image for quite a long time. She acted lovely, caring, agreeable, and understanding. She showed so much love, respect, and attention...
    Toliveandlearn Toliveandlearn 31-35, M 5 Responses Jan 21, 2013

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    MizzKeepItReal MizzKeepItReal 26-30, F 4 Responses Jan 12

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    I have been on and off again with my

    now ex for 10 months. At first he was the most charming man I had ever met. He bought me little things all the time that he knew I liked and big things when I didn't expect them. He held the door, was polite to everyone, and everyone he knew loved him. After this initial...
    rachelm1998 rachelm1998 26-30, F 2 Responses Feb 24

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    And I'm Still Recovering

    I thought I had been in some pretty sucky bad relationships, ha! They were very good healthy relationships compared to this one. I started dating this girl about a year and a half ago, we'll call her Voldemort because I do believe she is the true heir to Slytherin. Voldemort was...
    talktolabomb talktolabomb 18-21, F 8 Responses Aug 24, 2010

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    I have not been in one of these relationships,

    my mother has, she got out 6 months ago, she is having a very very hard time, I was wondering if any of you would have any advice to help her or a direction to point her, she is very depressed and sad all the time, she still finds a way to smile so I know there is still hope...
    Jlynn1424 Jlynn1424 26-30, F 3 Responses Jun 19

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    That Which Does Not Break Me...

    It's been nearly 4 years since I extracted myself from her clutches. We met online, and I was taken with her almost immediately.  I also happened to be in a vulnerable situation with my then-girlfriend, in which I was unhappy and considering leaving the relationship. ...
    divinetriangle divinetriangle 31-35, F 10 Responses May 3, 2008

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    Hi this is my story me

    and my N are on a break its been 4 days. I've known this guy for years since i was 21 and at uni he pursued me then but i wasn't interested at all as he had a huge ego and was very materialistic and flashy so he continued on with his life with many many girls and got a...
    leeds1984 leeds1984 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 6

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    Please someone tell me how I can stop my heart

    ache over my ex narcssistic husband please.
    luv0105 luv0105 41-45, F 2 Responses Apr 14

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    I actually met him online.

    He lived in Europe and I in the US. We fell madly in love, and were in a long distance relationship for 2.5 yrs before I finally was strong enough to break it off. He was controlling and mentally abusive to the point I considered suicide. Each time I tried to get away, he would...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Mar 27

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    my ex and I dated for 4 months.

    I broke up with him because I couldn't stand the abuse, the controlling manipulative angry person he was. he treated me like **** everyday he was so jealous and always argued and fought with me. as I tried breaking up with him he tried to make me feel guilty and sorry for him...
    thinlinee thinlinee 22-25, F Dec 16

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    Well, yesterday was a good day,

    and today is starting out the same. I had a dream about him again last night. Both last night and the night before were not bad dreams...just neutral I suppose. The night before last could have been a very real scenario. He came to my house and calmly said, "You know, if you...
    Avicularia Avicularia 31-35, F 1 Response Sep 9

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    luv0105 luv0105 41-45, F 2 Responses Jan 24

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    I have split up with my boyfriend

    who I now think is narcissist. I did research after we broke up because so many things just didn't add up. And after reading many articles and people's own stories in the comments section, I know believe he must have some sort of NPD. It was a toxic, unhealthy relationship...
    pd007 pd007 22-25, F 2 Responses Oct 8

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    luv0105 luv0105 41-45, F 4 Responses Mar 14

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    Having a better day today.

    I hate when I miss him cause I know I shouldn't
    confusedgirl01 confusedgirl01 31-35, F Sep 7

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    Feeling really down tonight.

    .. Will it ever stop hurtng?
    confusedgirl01 confusedgirl01 31-35, F 3 Responses Sep 6

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    He used the back of his spoon to check his

    teeth. He took three hours to get ready for the day. If I did not compliment him enough, he would ignore me like a spoiled child. I was demanded to look as wonderful as him even if I was exhausted and if it was not approved by him, he would pretend to others that he was not...
    AddyAddyAddy AddyAddyAddy 18-21, F 5 Responses Apr 12

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    I am getting out of a thirty-year marriage to a

    narcissist. I posted a story about a situation that I’m having with my soon to be ex-husband. I received a message from someone who gave me some very sound advice, and it led me to finding the website that I would like to share with my friends here at EP. It deals with...
    miryam57 miryam57 56-60, F 1 Response Dec 5

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    The Narcissist:

    I got out of my narcissistic relationship about 5 years ago , It was the "rollar coaster ", of all time, when we first meet i thought "wow what a fantastic guy" "ïvé hit the jackpot im so lucky"!!! ("ýea rite"!!!) ...
    Feflower Feflower 36-40, F 10 Responses Dec 14, 2007

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    It's All About Control

    I am learning about the 7 kinds of abuse.  I thought I stood up too him after he hit me.  I told him NEVER do that again.  I was shaking and terrified of what the next blow would feel like.  It didn't come.  It was silence.  He ignored me.  Let me sit in the corner shaking...
    flodials flodials 41-45, F 3 Responses Jun 6, 2012

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    No Contact!

    12 years with a Narcissist and suffered the abuse. I can tell you it is possible to get free and stay free. The only way is no contact. And I mean NO contact...no facebook checking profiles, no phone checks, no drive by work or home, no asking friends what they are up to...
    prettyjj prettyjj 41-45, F 6 Responses Aug 9, 2013

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    17 years with a narcissist

    and I never even knew there was a name for his abuse :( I was 21 when I got with him, he was 42 and now 17 yrs later I'm just washed up broken, damaged goods. He promised me the stars and gave me the garbage bin. How is anyone supposed to recover from that ****?!?
    Mieshamooi Mieshamooi 36-40, F 3 Responses Nov 30

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    Its not that I want to be with him

    but I can't stop obsessing over him & the girl he has been together with since the day (or probably before) we broke up. Is he treating her better coz it looks that way
    Mollyjai Mollyjai 26-30, F 4 Responses Apr 12

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    Living With An Alcoholic Narcissist Was Pure Hell

    When we met he seemed to be the answer to my dreams. Handsome, funny, generous, outgoing, and kind. We talked all the time, and he told me all about his life and his dreams and ambitions. I felt special with him, and so happy he trusted me enough to open up about himself so...
    MissConstrued MissConstrued 46-50, F 11 Responses Mar 19, 2013

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    Well, I suppose my narcissist got out of the

    relationship with me. Exactly 2 weeks ago, everything was rosy again. I say "again" because it was the typical pattern of his daily mood swings, me trying to smooth things over, apologize and explain, etc. two weeks ago tomorrow is when I was discarded. I've been no-contact...
    Avicularia Avicularia 31-35, F 1 Response Sep 5

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    At Least I'M Alive

    I thought that when I left him that the manipulations and rages would subside, just a little, see, we have a child together so NO CONTACT is hardly an option. I wish I would have left the state, heck, leave the country when I found out I was pregnant but I was full of the hopes...
    SpacegirlBlues SpacegirlBlues 31-35, F Jun 19, 2013

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    And he had a tiny p _ _ _ s.

    Which wouldn't have mattered but the fact he was so controlling and self centred and wore my make up and used all my skincare , made it matter even more, not even sex could make me want him. He'd ***** if his things weren't washed and we never even discussed him moving in, he...
    Whinny00 Whinny00 26-30, F 3 Responses Oct 22

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    So Frustrated

    About 2 1/2 years ago I got out of a very bad relationship of 12 years. I'm only 27, but when I look back I've been in a relationship since I was 13. The relationship of 12 years was ridiculous, but I could not let go. Call it weakness, co-dependency, naive, immature, etc...
    KNicoleT1986 KNicoleT1986 26-30, F 2 Responses Nov 19, 2013

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    Omg Being In A Relationship With A Narcissist Is A Terrible Experience

    Contrary to popular belief, there are many females who are narcissist. I was in a relationship with one for about 8 months, and it was both wonderful, and horrible. I was very much in love with her, that was part of the problem because she knew it, and took advantage of it, or...
    justbeit justbeit 51-55, M 8 Responses Oct 7, 2010

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    The more I learn about psychopathy/NPD,

    the more I forgive the one who ensnared me. He can't help what he is. But it's so hard to forgive myself for giving up my morals and boundaries just to please him. Why didn't I give *him* up when I knew I should have and had the chance? What I became was my fault, not his. He...
    Avicularia Avicularia 31-35, F 4 Responses Sep 8

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    what he said "I am the most handsome man I

    know", "Why cant I have everything? I dont understand" (meaning why cant he have me and the girl he cheated on me with), "I pose all the time" "I am not arrogant, I'm confident, nothing wrong with being confident", "I was the most handsome fat guy" (about himself when he was...
    untetheredsoul untetheredsoul 22-25, F 3 Responses Jan 28

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    The Dichotomy Of My Guilt And His Need

    I want to help. I want to be supportive. I like to please.  So I am introduced to this guy, so nice, so smart, but hurting.  We become friends.  The warning signs I missed included becoming such close friends so quickly, such a focus on me.  He bathed me in the light of his...
    DinahMoeHumm DinahMoeHumm 41-45, F 6 Responses Aug 6, 2012

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    Walked Out...

    Finally got the strength to walk out on my narcissistic poor excuse of a man. He kept giving me "I don't know's" and "maybe's" so I told him to have fun living in his "I don't know" world, looked at him straight in the eye, told him I'm leaving him and left. I had never seen the...
    zeneverythingzen zeneverythingzen 22-25, F 2 Responses Nov 17, 2013

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    I met my ex boyfriend four months ago.

    We met online and talked everyday for a month before actually meeting. We had very deep conversations and I felt like I already knew him even though we hadn't met yet. On our first date he brought me roses and made me feel like I was the only person in the room. Two weeks into...
    confusedgirl01 confusedgirl01 31-35, F 1 Response Sep 6

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    Narcissist I'v Dated In Northeast Pennsylvania

     This is my story… When you meet someone new, give it six weeks before you decide if it can be serious. Most people reveal their dark side within six weeks….My observation is gaining an interest in someone… can interrupt a perfectly normal life routine...
    Skyjumper75 Skyjumper75 51-55, M 9 Responses Dec 11, 2007

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    I jst recently got dumped by my nacsissist ex

    for someone else and im 7 wks pregnant. He knows but i havnt heard from him. The relationship moved quickly and i met his family whom at 37 he lives with. He was wth a girl strting at 16 and they had a daughter together. She left him after 14 yrs for someone else. I was the...
    mscamero mscamero 36-40, F 5 Responses Feb 11

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    My Ex Husand Was A Narcissist, Selfish To The Core

    He constantly complained I wasnt "emmeshed" with him in his career choice in being a musician. What!!!? 99% of all conversations for years was about his music! I was ready to puke if I had to listen to any more talk about himself. I was never allowed to talk about my career...
    lucyloo22 lucyloo22 41-45, F 3 Responses Sep 2, 2013

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    Being in a relationship with a narcissist is

    such a cruel and different experience. It took me years to rebuild my trust in myself and others. He took parts of me I never thought I could get back, but I have on my own. After a solid year of destroying my self esteem and confidence, he dropped me like I was nothing. It was...
    Izy96 Izy96 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 22

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    Now I Know

    I had heard the term narcissist before, but never really understood what it was until recently. I thought I had met the man of my dreams, my future husband. Our relationship started out perfectly, he was so attentive, showering me with attention, gifts, love and compliments. We...
    slcsux slcsux 31-35, F 5 Responses Mar 15, 2012

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    I was married to a narcissist

    for 6 years who destroyed me, left me for another woman and married her and I am still reeling.
    Rie70 Rie70 41-45, F 1 Response Oct 25

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    Threw prayer and great advice today I still hurt

    but the hold of my narcissistic husband is feeling loser....:-)
    luv0105 luv0105 41-45, F 1 Response Jan 23

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    Today is painful, my ex somehow got my email.

    He wrote me a big long message. It's funny I never gave it to him. He wrote to me how he came to my city last weekend and how he still needs to mail me my stuff. I know in reality he wants me to question why he did not call upon me while he was in my city and he wants me to tell...
    lwuisman lwuisman 22-25, F 4 Responses Jan 29

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    I have been in this exact same place  over

    half a dozen times before.  Why haven't I learned by now?  From hour to hour  and even minute to minute I NEVER know who you'll choose to see  when you look at me.  And no matter what you say  your actions scream the truth;  I will never truly be your 'completely enough...
    girlofnirvana girlofnirvana 26-30, F 5 Responses Aug 3

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    What Happened to "That Guy"

    I was married as was my Nar ex... We had an affair and ended up leaving our spouses and moving in together a year ago...WE had been friends first for about 5 years and he had a terrible reputation. He cheated on his wife of 10 years, quite openly, never took resp for anything...
    littlenady littlenady 36-40 5 Responses Jul 24, 2008

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    My Ex is a Narcissist I have suffered

    for 3 years his emotional abuse has left me so empty I don't know where to begin in rebuilding my life its only been 2 days but I am determined to stay away this time. When first met him I was in a vulnerable state my boy friend of 8 years had just passed away and i was on my...
    sazz85 sazz85 26-30, F 6 Responses Sep 14

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    Related Experiences

    So I just got out of a 5 1/2 year relationship. I dumped my boyfriend for the following reasons:Lack of ambitionLack of support/ never helped around the household, never worked...
    amandasbadluckchuck amandasbadluckchuck 22-25 Dec 3

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    I recently just got out of the second worse relationship in my life. This man was emotionally abusive. He was racist against everyone specially blck n Hispanics. And he would claim...
    TexasGypsyMommy TexasGypsyMommy 22-25, F 1 Response Dec 6

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