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I Had An Affair

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 13,967 People

    He text me last night

    and my heart jumped. I desperately wanted to respond but I didn't. He wanted to see me over the weekend but I didn't meet him. I love him so much and want to lie in his arms like I used to. But I can't. I know it's not a good situation for me. I can not take the guilt that comes...
    Australianladybug Australianladybug 31-35, F 17 Responses Mar 3

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    It's officially over!

    I saw his true side and I finally was strong enough to end it. I am hurting but relieved at the same time. This has definitely been a learning experience for me. :( I know in time I will get stronger each and everyday. Thank you to all to my EP friends for your support and...
    Cheeks2014 Cheeks2014 36-40, F 28 Responses Jan 19

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    I got to see my AP yesterday.

    It was wonderful and perfect.
    nikalpikal nikalpikal 41-45, F 4 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    I love my AP and husband.

    They both have the qualities I love but I wish it were all wrapped up in one guy. I can't leave my husband. I also can't let my AP go. I try and he seems to hold on as well. I'm not sure what to do anymore.
    timetochange2 timetochange2 41-45, F 5 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    She wasn't supposed to stay last night.

    Our date was just for the dance but, like always, we ended up in bed. I mean, she told me when I picked her up that there would be no hanky panky. As if we could regulate our feelings... She came in for a minute after the dance though, we snuggled talking, and it soon became...
    pcflvly pcflvly 46-50, M 1 Response 2 days ago

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    So after some thought

    and review of my own experience and others I have discovered the following. If you are involved in an affair there is something major missing from your marriage. We seem willing ( especially us women) to be used by our AP for their own satisfaction even at the expense of our...
    lovinglife11 lovinglife11 31-35, F 22 Responses Mar 27

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    I Could Help It

    It started about 4 months ago in the grocery store i caughgt a guy about 23 watching me it kind of creaped me out and excited me at the same time seeing that my husband isnt interested anymore.So i paid for my things and headed for my car. As i turned around that guy had folloed...
    imsweetenough imsweetenough 31-35, F 205 Responses Dec 30, 2011

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    What a storm in a teacup affairs really ARE.

    .. All contained within the walls of our hearts and minds, never to see the light of day. Haunting in their hidden beauty and their memorable "one liners". Covered with innuendos and lies just to have that one more hug, one more look, one more talk, one more kiss, then one more...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 17 Responses a week ago

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    Monogamy is an outdated practice.

    True Love should not be bound by rules and restrictions. True Love should be liberating and free! Seriously. I'm not encouraging you to cheat on your husband, I'm just saying, if you do, it's not THAT bad of a thing. You might even want to consider speaking with him...
    AaronLA AaronLA 31-35, M 6 Responses 1 day ago

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    I cheated on my husband

    and all I want is to fix it, what can I do to show him that I love him and I can change? Serious advice only please, I already know what I've done is wrong and Devastating, I don't need the rude and awful comments. If I didn't want to fix my marriage I wouldn't be posting...
    akahi akahi 22-25, F 11 Responses 4 days ago

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    Feeling angry Frustrated at home .

    .. Should leave was working on it but good hubby behaviour ( minus the sex) slowed that process down And the AP is behaving like a complete ******* ... Fantastic for a week or so followed by a few ****** days.. That's the cycle lately. Why do I do this to myself, put up with it...
    zoey3000 zoey3000 31-35, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    I hope she was worth all this,

    Mike. I hope she puts you through 7 years of hell and heartache. I hope she rips your heart out.
    SlashedHeart SlashedHeart 51-55, F 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    narcissist [nahr-suh-sist] Spell

    Syllables Examples Word Origin noun 1. a person who is overly self-involved, and often vain and selfish. 2. Psychoanalysis. a person who suffers from narcissism, deriving erotic gratification from admiration of his or her own physical or mental attributes.
    SlashedHeart SlashedHeart 51-55, F 15 hrs ago

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    Good days are outweighing the bad now.

    When will the bad be totally gone?? The anger, resentment, regrets....my choices, my decisions, his part in all of it. When is the magic day that comes where I am finally at peace with things? When??? Because waiting for it is torture. Meanwhile, I get pissed off and vent. Get...
    Mystery226 Mystery226 46-50, F 5 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    It wasn't so much an affair

    as it was a ******* or 5. During one my husband walked up to the car and caught me. I thought I was in so much trouble. Within two days my husband was begging me to **** the other guy and let him watch.
    greenmountainmomma greenmountainmomma 31-35, F 21 Responses Jan 30

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    It's been over for a year.

    The toughest year in my adult life. I believe like everyone, I have an innate emotional intelligence that will direct me to my personal bliss. The affair woke me up to passion, like nothing else has ever done before. I'm more empathic, less judgmental & more open minded than...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 15 Responses May 27

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    I am married with kids,

    he is also married with kids. Going on since last November. I'm addicted to him and our trysts. I tried to end it on numerous occasions because I know it is morally wrong. Obviously that didn't last. I love what we have and love him too. It will never happen between us...
    SexyMomma37 SexyMomma37 36-40, F 16 Responses Mar 13

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    What a day, a real nice day.

    I got a nice surprise that allowed me to spend that unexpected alone time with AP. Those visits to my office are never less than amazing. The element of surprise is such a necessary thing and something I was glad to provide. That's what makes this so intoxicating for both of us...
    surfandturf surfandturf 36-40, F 7 Responses 5 days ago

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    One thing out of this mess I've been thru,

    that I can take away. A lot of self discovery. Why I do the things I do. Why I react the way I do. How to accept my responsibility in getting to this point. I did pursue him. I knew he was on the line. Lonely husband. It's like I can smell them a mile away. Of course, why else...
    Mystery226 Mystery226 46-50, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    My Husband's Best Freind

    I t was exactly 1 yr ago. I was so depressed and ready to give up on ever being happy. My husband at the time was being very emotionally and verbally abusive. I got an e-mail from my husband's best freind. He was wondering how we were doing, and needed to talk. He had just split...
    hotandcuddly hotandcuddly 51-55, F 48 Responses Sep 1, 2011

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    This is a private message I wrote to a fellow

    EP member, but I wanted to share my thoughts publicly: Thanks again for your insight. I'm not very wordy today, but wanted to tell you that I have been doing a lot of self reflection and am slowly learning about myself and what my actions mean to me. I've actually been this...
    Koalaclover Koalaclover 36-40, F 1 Response 25 mins ago

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    My sympathies to the spouses

    and family of cowards that cheat.
    pleasestoplying pleasestoplying 51-55, M 1 Response 5 days ago

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    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 3 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    I almost called you yesterday.

    I have been so sick with the flu, I wanted to die. Being that sick made me want you. I wanted to hear your voice and tell me everything was going to be okay. But I didn't. I got through it without you. Why would I want to call a selfish pig like you. I hate you, I want to see...
    SlashedHeart SlashedHeart 51-55, F 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    I hope... ...Every day

    when you wake up, you miss the good morning texts and calls we shared. ...Every night you think about how we would say " goodnight love bug." ...When you see a woman with auburn hair, you think about how you loved to wrap my curls around your fingers when we kissed. ...You...
    Urbancowgirl Urbancowgirl 36-40 10 Responses Dec 16, 2013

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    I am sitting here crying.

    We are doing good, set date for our next meeting. But why the tears keep coming?"Are you on the phone?" You asked me. Today I am feeling relaxed, I need to stop acting desperate around you. I no longer interrupt any phone conversations because of your present. Finally I put my...
    myheart99 myheart99 36-40, F 5 Responses a week ago

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    He Doesn'T Know

    But I'm getting ready to leave him. He doesn't know. The love of my life. The most beautiful man that should be mine. All the promises I made him. I will break. He won't leave me ever. He has no reason to. I can't compartmentaliZe. Im not a box. And he's my world. The playing...
    mysecretworld mysecretworld 36-40, F 16 Responses Nov 4, 2013

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    Lyndsey and Michael: Age gap 41 yearsWE HAVE

    MORE SEX THAN COUPLES IN THEIR 30sLyndsey Armitage, 32, a community safety warden from Ash, Surrey, and her husband Michael, 73, a pub landlord, met 10 years ago. She says:“I was 22 when I first met Mike. At 63, he was 41 years older than me and I know it sounds ridiculous...
    killycc12 killycc12 26-30, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    For SLASHEDHEART... And

    for myself too I guess and anyone else that needs it .... xxx
    zoey3000 zoey3000 31-35, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    Maybe you're reading this

    because you are having an affair or had one already or maybe you are thinking about doing it. I can't give advice because I have no clue. All I know is I am recovering and it's been a long recovery. I think the most surprising aspect was the emotion that came with this...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 20 Responses Jan 4

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    Update: Still going strong with my secret love.

    .. I still think about how wrong this is. Every minute, every text....every stolen kiss and every intense moment we share. If it's so wrong, why in the hell does it feel so right?? I asked my husband what would happen if I ever cheated on him... What would he think, what...
    Chelsea84 Chelsea84 26-30, F 20 Responses Feb 8

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    More Like, 'my Affair Had Me'

    my affair did have me - for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. it chewed me up, spit me out, and i have yet to recover. we were in love, and probably still are (i definitely am) but ultimately it was my choice to end it - i didnt want to end my marriage for various reasons and knew...
    IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm 31-35, F 26 Responses Dec 26, 2011

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    Have you seen the movie "the descendants" ?

    ? The MM never really loved the MW.... Makes me think about the rush we "think" we feeling... Is it real???
    zoey3000 zoey3000 31-35, F 5 Responses 4 days ago

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    An affair... The beginning: The best part.

    The getting to know each other, the can't get enough, the spark, the passion, the excitement, the fun, the romance, the constant communication, you won't fall in love The middle: Still passionate, still exciting, still fun, still communicating regularly, the romance is still...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 9 Responses Feb 22

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    Shocking Love Affair

    I must confess something here that I thought, I would never ever talk about in my life. But I have to admit, I had an affair. Yes I did, and now I have to live with it for the rest of my life. Here's my shocking story..... About two weeks ago, I cheated on my true love...I...
    JimMorrisonRocks JimMorrisonRocks 26-30, M 26 Responses Jun 25, 2012

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    Do you ever wish you could meet done of the

    friends you have made on here.....the ones who know everything about you but never judge you? We can't have these conversations with our friends (or many of them. I think we all have at least one that we trust enough to tell) ....they might judge/spill our secrets. But out...
    sallyanne44 sallyanne44 41-45, F 20 Responses Jul 30

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    It's time... I realized this morning I need to

    let go.. His text.. " I'm feeling better about myself, focusing more on things in my life I should be focusing on.. " That melted my heart.. Knowing he is finding peace.. He sruggled this entire affair, as well as I did... He could have left without a trace, never to...
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 11 Responses 6 days ago

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    I am having problems recovering from this.

    It was not a long affair, only a few months, but at some point we were both getting too emotionally attached and it was not what we had planned, so we decided to end it. I know it was the right thing to do for both of us, but it feels horrible not being able to talk about it, to...
    Natalie012 Natalie012 26-30, F 7 Responses 2 days ago

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    Another month has passed,

    the pain and ache do go away, slowly, I find myself waking up in the middle of the night, and just thinking, remembering the beginning, how I felt, the middle, all the good times then the end, and the sad times, as I get further away, I start to see my life clearer, during the...
    mntmama mntmama 36-40, F 12 Responses 5 days ago

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    I've decided going forward

    if someone comments negatively on an experience I share here, I'm going to immediately delete their comment and block them. My experiences are part of my past, they're factual and they've already occurred so unkind, judgmental remarks are a waste of time and unnecessary. I don't...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 8 Responses Mar 15

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    No not really. Sorry to disappoint you

    but you ladies in your 40s might want to hear this anyway. I have been crazy with thoughts about affairs and really any idiot has been looking like Brad Pitt to me since last December. I was unhappy, depressed and even put myself in the situations that could have ended up with...
    discovery5 discovery5 41-45, F 18 Responses Apr 25

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    I'm married to a wonderful man

    and have two beautiful children but I have been having an affair with a MM for over a year. It's been a tremendous experience for me, both good and bad, and I don't know if I ever want it to end. Lots to talk about sometime but just saying hi to you all for now. I'm so glad I...
    Wikedangel Wikedangel 36-40, F 20 Responses Jan 4

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    Today, urged on by an EP friend,

    I deleted the Hotmail account that I had used exclusively, off and on, to correspond with my OW between 2006 and 2013. In there were the early love notes when we were exploring the possibility of crossing the line. I also kept some sad ones from the times that we were apart at...
    Wilbury Wilbury 41-45, M 18 Responses Jan 15

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    "How do you know for sure you loved him?

    " "Because it feels like someone died. You don't grieve lust."
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 11 Responses Mar 22

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    An interesting read http://www.

    crystalinks.com/entangled.html
    zoey3000 zoey3000 31-35, F 1 day ago

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    Ladies, please do not have affairs with married

    men. They are painful experiences and absolutely no good comes out of it. If anything, you lose a lot more. This affair has turned my world upside down, lost friends, family members and a job. One man is not worth that,,a cheating man at that.
    SlashedHeart SlashedHeart 51-55, F 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    I am having a hard time letting go

    and feel tormented. For me, it is one of the worse feelings in the world when you want to talk to your lover and can't...or they are unresponsive to your requests...it hurts and there is nothing you can do about it because they don't belong to you. The memories and good times...
    Dreamgirl75 Dreamgirl75 36-40, F 23 Responses Apr 10

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    I have been in EP for a few months,

    read many stories here, particularly in this experience and other post about had an affair. Just amazed, how easily other shallow peoples tried to judged other person when they have read the experience. Some of us, didn't have plan to be the other woman. And some of MM are also...
    ssally123 ssally123 41-45, F 19 Responses Jan 4

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    I have come full circle with my affair.

    .. This was the most beautiful yet unhealthiest relationship I have ever engaged in.... I trashed my self esteem, my morals and my heart for this relationship. I loved with every fiber in my body and every cell of my brain yet I was slowly reduced to a friend with no possibility...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 11 Responses Dec 17, 2013

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    Dear Haters: I would like to give you an

    insight of a person that is currently involved in having an affair and giving this insight might give you a different opinion of us...might not agree with our actions but never judge someone before you know the entire story....so here it goes... We are human...we are daughters...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 37 Responses Sep 16

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    Spent the last week going through my own

    personal hell. Yes I know, it's what I created and what I deserved. Husband asked if it was worth it, I replied no. I never got caught, I came clean. I wish I never met this other man, my life was fine, before he walked in. Now all I have are memories. I threw away my marriage...
    akahi akahi 22-25, F 4 Responses 15 hrs ago

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    I have come to a conclusion.

    It's taken me a while but I see it so clearly between last night and tonight.....My life will never be the same, I cannot go back from this affair. I am forever changed. I let someone I care deeply about in and change my whole life. No one to blame but myself, but the only way...
    Suzanne1976 Suzanne1976 36-40, F 6 Responses 2 days ago

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    Affair With Son In Law, Now Pregnant

    I have searched all over the web for this situation and I have yet to find anything that remotely correlates.  I lost my job a few months ago and I moved in my eldest daughter and family.  I will admit right here and now that I have always had a crush on...
    littlejon63 littlejon63 46-50 356 Responses Mar 24, 2009

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