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I Had An Affair

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 13,973 People

    letting go.. He ended things.

    .. Walked away.. We both knew that hearts could change.. No strings.. Then why the "friendship"? Why? at first I needed it.. But What about now? I'm holding on to hope.. I admit it.. That tiny little bit of hope that we will find "us" again.. But What about...
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 4 Responses 2 days ago

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    Ok. After I said I would never do this again.

    .. I failed and crumbled. I met someone else. He's married too. Yes I'm gonna hear every ones opinions good or bad. I should have had more control but I felt vulnerable . Uggh!!!
    js1276 js1276 36-40, F 8 Responses 1 day ago

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    I've decided going forward

    if someone comments negatively on an experience I share here, I'm going to immediately delete their comment and block them. My experiences are part of my past, they're factual and they've already occurred so unkind, judgmental remarks are a waste of time and unnecessary. I don't...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 8 Responses Mar 15

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    Affair With Son In Law, Now Pregnant

    I have searched all over the web for this situation and I have yet to find anything that remotely correlates.  I lost my job a few months ago and I moved in my eldest daughter and family.  I will admit right here and now that I have always had a crush on...
    littlejon63 littlejon63 46-50 356 Responses Mar 24, 2009

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    For SLASHEDHEART... And

    for myself too I guess and anyone else that needs it .... xxx
    zoey3000 zoey3000 31-35, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    It's officially over!

    I saw his true side and I finally was strong enough to end it. I am hurting but relieved at the same time. This has definitely been a learning experience for me. :( I know in time I will get stronger each and everyday. Thank you to all to my EP friends for your support and...
    Cheeks2014 Cheeks2014 36-40, F 28 Responses Jan 19

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    No I didn't have an affair,

    but I can't stand the fact that people are actually proud of having one. Having an affair these days is apparently quite common so it makes "okay." I can't believe that is what some people really think! It's not okay and having one has consequences. No matter what reason you...
    SiriusJT SiriusJT 18-21, M 6 Responses 23 hrs ago

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    "How do you know for sure you loved him?

    " "Because it feels like someone died. You don't grieve lust."
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 11 Responses Mar 22

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    We slipped.... Sexy hot texts back

    and fourth about how much were craving each other... I miss him so freakin' much..
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 11 Responses 1 day ago

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    I ended things with my AP tonite,

    I went to his place, we sat outside, he smoked a cigarette, we small talked, he told me he wanted to tell me about his personal life, he told me he has a girlfriend, we talked about that for a bit, he invited me in for wine and I declined, I never have before, I told him we need...
    mntmama mntmama 36-40, F 6 Responses 1 day ago

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    Good days are outweighing the bad now.

    When will the bad be totally gone?? The anger, resentment, regrets....my choices, my decisions, his part in all of it. When is the magic day that comes where I am finally at peace with things? When??? Because waiting for it is torture. Meanwhile, I get pissed off and vent. Get...
    Mystery226 Mystery226 46-50, F 5 Responses 2 days ago

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    An affair... The beginning: The best part.

    The getting to know each other, the can't get enough, the spark, the passion, the excitement, the fun, the romance, the constant communication, you won't fall in love The middle: Still passionate, still exciting, still fun, still communicating regularly, the romance is still...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 9 Responses Feb 22

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    I knew this would be tough,

    we have been texting all day everyday since February, and today is the first day without him, I keep checking my phone, looking for his texts, force of habit, I guess :(
    mntmama mntmama 36-40, F 6 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    I have discussed this earlier.

    . I'm not married but If my wife found a lover yet still wants to be my wife, I think I will be ok with it and make it work. And to be honest too I think I like having a wife that is desired by others. I don't want to watch or anything but yea I can live with that.
    GuyKL GuyKL 41-45, M 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Update: Still going strong with my secret love.

    .. I still think about how wrong this is. Every minute, every text....every stolen kiss and every intense moment we share. If it's so wrong, why in the hell does it feel so right?? I asked my husband what would happen if I ever cheated on him... What would he think, what...
    Chelsea84 Chelsea84 26-30, F 20 Responses Feb 8

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    Dear Jonathan And Our Two Children.....i'm So Sorry.

    Tomorrow 01/13/13 is the1 year anniversary of my relationship with the man I'm having an affair with, the man I compromised my entire life for, the man I chose over my family when I got caught 6 months ago, and the man I currently live with today. And 1 year ago tomorrow I...
    Annie3321 Annie3321 26-30, F 87 Responses Jan 12, 2013

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    An interesting read http://www.

    crystalinks.com/entangled.html
    zoey3000 zoey3000 31-35, F 3 days ago

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    I hope... ...Every day

    when you wake up, you miss the good morning texts and calls we shared. ...Every night you think about how we would say " goodnight love bug." ...When you see a woman with auburn hair, you think about how you loved to wrap my curls around your fingers when we kissed. ...You...
    Urbancowgirl Urbancowgirl 36-40 10 Responses Dec 16, 2013

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    I'm feeling a little bit sad right now.

    .. I started to listen to music again during the last couple of weeks, but I tend to avoid love songs. Today, I decided to listen to The Calling as I don't really relate the band to typical sappy love songs. I have loved the song "Where Ever You Will Go" for well over a decade...
    Koalaclover Koalaclover 36-40, F 7 Responses 21 hrs ago

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    When it ended for me 9 months ago,

    I didn't want to hear about Time being the healing factor, because time was just an inanimate word and the burning pain in my chest and soul could not be soothed. Time was a vacuum.. a void. Being in 2 relationships never made sense to me. It's some kind of "temporary...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 10 Responses Jan 10

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    No not really. Sorry to disappoint you

    but you ladies in your 40s might want to hear this anyway. I have been crazy with thoughts about affairs and really any idiot has been looking like Brad Pitt to me since last December. I was unhappy, depressed and even put myself in the situations that could have ended up with...
    discovery5 discovery5 41-45, F 18 Responses Apr 25

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    Maybe you're reading this

    because you are having an affair or had one already or maybe you are thinking about doing it. I can't give advice because I have no clue. All I know is I am recovering and it's been a long recovery. I think the most surprising aspect was the emotion that came with this...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 20 Responses Jan 4

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    narcissist [nahr-suh-sist] Spell

    Syllables Examples Word Origin noun 1. a person who is overly self-involved, and often vain and selfish. 2. Psychoanalysis. a person who suffers from narcissism, deriving erotic gratification from admiration of his or her own physical or mental attributes.
    Linley242 Linley242 51-55, F 2 days ago

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    What a storm in a teacup affairs really ARE.

    .. All contained within the walls of our hearts and minds, never to see the light of day. Haunting in their hidden beauty and their memorable "one liners". Covered with innuendos and lies just to have that one more hug, one more look, one more talk, one more kiss, then one more...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 17 Responses Oct 13

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    I am having a hard time letting go

    and feel tormented. For me, it is one of the worse feelings in the world when you want to talk to your lover and can't...or they are unresponsive to your requests...it hurts and there is nothing you can do about it because they don't belong to you. The memories and good times...
    Dreamgirl75 Dreamgirl75 36-40, F 23 Responses Apr 10

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    Dear Haters: I would like to give you an

    insight of a person that is currently involved in having an affair and giving this insight might give you a different opinion of us...might not agree with our actions but never judge someone before you know the entire story....so here it goes... We are human...we are daughters...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 36 Responses Sep 16

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    More Like, 'my Affair Had Me'

    my affair did have me - for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. it chewed me up, spit me out, and i have yet to recover. we were in love, and probably still are (i definitely am) but ultimately it was my choice to end it - i didnt want to end my marriage for various reasons and knew...
    IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm 31-35, F 26 Responses Dec 26, 2011

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    So after some thought

    and review of my own experience and others I have discovered the following. If you are involved in an affair there is something major missing from your marriage. We seem willing ( especially us women) to be used by our AP for their own satisfaction even at the expense of our...
    lovinglife11 lovinglife11 31-35, F 21 Responses Mar 27

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    "What's Left" A few pictures,

    two tickets, from a trip we took last year, A handful of memories, some still seem clear, A few regrets, a couple of melodies, that remind me of you, I could say that I won't miss this, but that wouldn't be the truth, There's no one here to blame, and this is the only way, There...
    Mystery226 Mystery226 46-50, F 5 Responses 1 day ago

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    I have come to a conclusion.

    It's taken me a while but I see it so clearly between last night and tonight.....My life will never be the same, I cannot go back from this affair. I am forever changed. I let someone I care deeply about in and change my whole life. No one to blame but myself, but the only way...
    Suzanne1976 Suzanne1976 36-40, F 5 Responses 4 days ago

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    One thing out of this mess I've been thru,

    that I can take away. A lot of self discovery. Why I do the things I do. Why I react the way I do. How to accept my responsibility in getting to this point. I did pursue him. I knew he was on the line. Lonely husband. It's like I can smell them a mile away. Of course, why else...
    Mystery226 Mystery226 46-50, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    He Doesn'T Know

    But I'm getting ready to leave him. He doesn't know. The love of my life. The most beautiful man that should be mine. All the promises I made him. I will break. He won't leave me ever. He has no reason to. I can't compartmentaliZe. Im not a box. And he's my world. The playing...
    mysecretworld mysecretworld 36-40, F 16 Responses Nov 4, 2013

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    I Could Help It

    It started about 4 months ago in the grocery store i caughgt a guy about 23 watching me it kind of creaped me out and excited me at the same time seeing that my husband isnt interested anymore.So i paid for my things and headed for my car. As i turned around that guy had folloed...
    imsweetenough imsweetenough 31-35, F 205 Responses Dec 30, 2011

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    I'm married to a wonderful man

    and have two beautiful children but I have been having an affair with a MM for over a year. It's been a tremendous experience for me, both good and bad, and I don't know if I ever want it to end. Lots to talk about sometime but just saying hi to you all for now. I'm so glad I...
    Wikedangel Wikedangel 36-40, F 20 Responses Jan 4

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    I sort of feel like an idiot.

    .. I think that exAP and I sort of started having an emotional affair. We've been talking again and we hung out for about 6 hours (completely platonically) when I got back from my vacation... While on vacation with my BFF, she introduced me to her male friend. My BFF and I went...
    Koalaclover Koalaclover 36-40, F 3 Responses 3 days ago

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    My Husband's Best Freind

    I t was exactly 1 yr ago. I was so depressed and ready to give up on ever being happy. My husband at the time was being very emotionally and verbally abusive. I got an e-mail from my husband's best freind. He was wondering how we were doing, and needed to talk. He had just split...
    hotandcuddly hotandcuddly 51-55, F 48 Responses Sep 1, 2011

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    Ladies, please do not have affairs with married

    men. They are painful experiences and absolutely no good comes out of it. If anything, you lose a lot more. This affair has turned my world upside down, lost friends, family members and a job. One man is not worth that,,a cheating man at that.
    Linley242 Linley242 51-55, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    Today, urged on by an EP friend,

    I deleted the Hotmail account that I had used exclusively, off and on, to correspond with my OW between 2006 and 2013. In there were the early love notes when we were exploring the possibility of crossing the line. I also kept some sad ones from the times that we were apart at...
    Wilbury Wilbury 41-45, M 18 Responses Jan 15

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    Shocking Love Affair

    I must confess something here that I thought, I would never ever talk about in my life. But I have to admit, I had an affair. Yes I did, and now I have to live with it for the rest of my life. Here's my shocking story..... About two weeks ago, I cheated on my true love...I...
    JimMorrisonRocks JimMorrisonRocks 26-30, M 26 Responses Jun 25, 2012

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    I am still so angry at you.

    You have made me a bitter person towards you and I want to see you hurt. That is not me. I would never wish any thing like that upon any one. I have never been this angry. You striped me of everything good that I had in me, I don't have the strength to get back up,,,,not yet...
    Linley242 Linley242 51-55, F 1 Response 13 hrs ago

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    I got to see my AP yesterday.

    It was wonderful and perfect.
    nikalpikal nikalpikal 41-45, F 4 Responses 2 days ago

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    The thing about affairs.

    Maybe it's just sex, something new and exciting. The touch, the want, the feeling of being wanted, appreciated; needed. Maybe he was my soul-mate, he understands me, accepts me; listens. We connect on many, almost every level. Just like every new and fresh relationship, this...
    akahi akahi 22-25, F 5 Responses 16 hrs ago

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    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 8 Responses 2 days ago

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    Two Lovers, One Night.

    I'm afraid this is going to make me sound slutty. That is not really the case, i have just had weak moments in my life. I’m going to leave a lot of the mundane details out of this story to make it more interesting. This did happen several years ago but by highlighting the...
    emstioy emstioy 46-50, F 69 Responses Jan 8, 2012

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    Feeling angry Frustrated at home .

    .. Should leave was working on it but good hubby behaviour ( minus the sex) slowed that process down And the AP is behaving like a complete ******* ... Fantastic for a week or so followed by a few ****** days.. That's the cycle lately. Why do I do this to myself, put up with it...
    zoey3000 zoey3000 31-35, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    I am married with kids,

    he is also married with kids. Going on since last November. I'm addicted to him and our trysts. I tried to end it on numerous occasions because I know it is morally wrong. Obviously that didn't last. I love what we have and love him too. It will never happen between us...
    SexyMomma37 SexyMomma37 36-40, F 16 Responses Mar 13

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    He text me last night

    and my heart jumped. I desperately wanted to respond but I didn't. He wanted to see me over the weekend but I didn't meet him. I love him so much and want to lie in his arms like I used to. But I can't. I know it's not a good situation for me. I can not take the guilt that comes...
    Australianladybug Australianladybug 31-35, F 17 Responses Mar 3

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    I am having problems recovering from this.

    It was not a long affair, only a few months, but at some point we were both getting too emotionally attached and it was not what we had planned, so we decided to end it. I know it was the right thing to do for both of us, but it feels horrible not being able to talk about it, to...
    Natalie012 Natalie012 26-30, F 6 Responses 4 days ago

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    It wasn't so much an affair

    as it was a ******* or 5. During one my husband walked up to the car and caught me. I thought I was in so much trouble. Within two days my husband was begging me to **** the other guy and let him watch.
    greenmountainmomma greenmountainmomma 31-35, F 21 Responses Jan 30

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    Do you ever wish you could meet done of the

    friends you have made on here.....the ones who know everything about you but never judge you? We can't have these conversations with our friends (or many of them. I think we all have at least one that we trust enough to tell) ....they might judge/spill our secrets. But out...
    sallyanne44 sallyanne44 41-45, F 21 Responses Jul 30

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    I have come full circle with my affair.

    .. This was the most beautiful yet unhealthiest relationship I have ever engaged in.... I trashed my self esteem, my morals and my heart for this relationship. I loved with every fiber in my body and every cell of my brain yet I was slowly reduced to a friend with no possibility...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 11 Responses Dec 17, 2013

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    Spent the last week going through my own

    personal hell. Yes I know, it's what I created and what I deserved. Husband asked if it was worth it, I replied no. I never got caught, I came clean. I wish I never met this other man, my life was fine, before he walked in. Now all I have are memories. I threw away my marriage...
    akahi akahi 22-25, F 6 Responses 2 days ago

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    I have been in EP for a few months,

    read many stories here, particularly in this experience and other post about had an affair. Just amazed, how easily other shallow peoples tried to judged other person when they have read the experience. Some of us, didn't have plan to be the other woman. And some of MM are also...
    ssally123 ssally123 41-45, F 19 Responses Jan 4

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