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I Had An Affair

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 14,339 People

    She told me it was never an affair.

    When is an affair not an affair? She was married and lived with her husband and children. Sounds like an affair to me but she insisted, saying over and over that it was not an affair. She offered two reasons. One was that her and her husband never promised to be exclusive with...
    pcflvly pcflvly 46-50, M 13 Responses 1 day ago

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    Shocking Love Affair

    I must confess something here that I thought, I would never ever talk about in my life. But I have to admit, I had an affair. Yes I did, and now I have to live with it for the rest of my life. Here's my shocking story..... About two weeks ago, I cheated on my true love...I...
    JimMorrisonRocks JimMorrisonRocks 26-30, M 27 Responses Jun 25, 2012

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    I'm an affair success story.

    In a short period of time, my life took a direction that I never thought possible. I never saw it coming, did things I never thought I was ever capable of, and struggled through some turmoil...but it took my life in a direction that was best for me. This is quite long, as I'm...
    happyasever happyasever 31-35, F 7 Responses Nov 23, 2014

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    We started out as friends.

    I am married with two wonderful children. I never set out to have an affair, the thought didn't cross my mind in the beginning. I just enjoyed his friendship. I guess having a friend of the opposite sex, it tends to fill a void .... Something I had been missing in my marriage...
    sundevilgsd sundevilgsd 31-35, F 4 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    Two Lovers, One Night.

    I'm afraid this is going to make me sound slutty. That is not really the case, i have just had weak moments in my life. I’m going to leave a lot of the mundane details out of this story to make it more interesting. This did happen several years ago but by highlighting the...
    emstioy emstioy 46-50, F 68 Responses Jan 8, 2012

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    I have come full circle with my affair.

    .. This was the most beautiful yet unhealthiest relationship I have ever engaged in.... I trashed my self esteem, my morals and my heart for this relationship. I loved with every fiber in my body and every cell of my brain yet I was slowly reduced to a friend with no possibility...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 10 Responses Dec 17, 2013

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    It's officially over!

    I saw his true side and I finally was strong enough to end it. I am hurting but relieved at the same time. This has definitely been a learning experience for me. :( I know in time I will get stronger each and everyday. Thank you to all to my EP friends for your support and...
    Cheeks2014 Cheeks2014 36-40, F 27 Responses Jan 19, 2014

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    I don't even know what to call this any more.

    .. I don't even know if i want this any more... Sorry this is going to be long but i need to just get this out there in some form before i go crazy! You can judge me all you like but trust me no one hates me more then i hate self right now. Found each other on a website June...
    Prettybutterfly88 Prettybutterfly88 26-30, F 5 Responses 5 days ago

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    "How do you know for sure you loved him?

    " "Because it feels like someone died. You don't grieve lust."
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 12 Responses Mar 22, 2014

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    I am almost going to be married to my husband

    for 12 years. This month is our anniversary.Together for 16. Dam that's a long time!!! Never would have thought an affair would be part of our story but it is. The affair Feels like an old dream and my husband feels like my favorite pair of Hudson's!
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    More Like, 'my Affair Had Me'

    my affair did have me - for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. it chewed me up, spit me out, and i have yet to recover. we were in love, and probably still are (i definitely am) but ultimately it was my choice to end it - i didnt want to end my marriage for various reasons and knew...
    IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm 31-35, F 26 Responses Dec 26, 2011

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    Sometimes I wonder...

    . what if we love fearlessly with all our might. Will the outcome be any different? Often we guard ourselves by drawing back, playing games, withdrawing into silence when we feel afraid or overwhelmed by our feelings, especially in an affair because we think an affair is wrong...
    HurtsEverywhere HurtsEverywhere 31-35, F 7 Responses a week ago

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    Having a great night.

    Six weeks ago my MM said that he was leaving his wife. I had never pressured him to do this at any stage, but deep down inside it gave me hope. He had mentioned it a few times in passing before but I never entered into a conversation about it with him. I didn't want the pressure...
    TASTRS TASTRS 41-45, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    No not really. Sorry to disappoint you

    but you ladies in your 40s might want to hear this anyway. I have been crazy with thoughts about affairs and really any idiot has been looking like Brad Pitt to me since last December. I was unhappy, depressed and even put myself in the situations that could have ended up with...
    discovery5 discovery5 41-45, F 17 Responses Apr 25, 2014

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    Do you ever wish you could meet done of the

    friends you have made on here.....the ones who know everything about you but never judge you? We can't have these conversations with our friends (or many of them. I think we all have at least one that we trust enough to tell) ....they might judge/spill our secrets. But out...
    sallyanne44 sallyanne44 41-45, F 19 Responses Jul 30, 2014

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    There are numerous older men in the world

    who are single and seeking someone special in their life. For all such men, AgeMeet.com has been created as a reliable online platform to find women for dating and companionship. The spokesperson reports that many older men have started finding perfect companions through their...
    angiestong angiestong 26-30, F 6 days ago

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    Maybe you're reading this

    because you are having an affair or had one already or maybe you are thinking about doing it. I can't give advice because I have no clue. All I know is I am recovering and it's been a long recovery. I think the most surprising aspect was the emotion that came with this...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 21 Responses Jan 4, 2014

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    goodbye/thank you/sorry/closure letter Has

    anyone written and sent a closure letter/email out? How do u fit all that u want to say within a letter? I've so much I want to say after 48 days of NC, yet I'm not sure how and where to begin. could be a bit early to write one, but he's in town tomorrow and I hope to pass the...
    FleetingThots FleetingThots 36-40, F 6 Responses 2 days ago

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    here are numerous older men in the world

    who are single and seeking someone special in their life. For all such men, AgeMeet.com has been created as a reliable online platform to find women for dating and companionship. The spokesperson reports that many older men have started finding perfect companions through their...
    anneluna anneluna 26-30, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    What do you remember about your ex's immediately

    after breakup and a year after? The good and the bad memories? Do you find yourself remembering only the good memories of your ex eventually especially if you weren't the one to initiate the breakup? How about those people who initiated a breakup?
    FleetingThots FleetingThots 36-40, F 3 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    Dear Wife, Your husband has been cheating on

    you for 10 years with all different women, he never engaged in relationships, just sex. Until he met me. The first time it happened, I felt bad, but not really, it was only going to be that once. Of course, though, it didn't stay that way. After then we got to know each...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 11 Responses Feb 13

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    Been having urges to contact ex AP

    even though I know I'll be ignored for whatever reason.. Question... What do YOU do to keep yourself from reaching out?
    LostSoul1212 LostSoul1212 26-30, M 14 Responses 19 hrs ago

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    I'm not the one having the affair he is,

    I'm not with anyone. I can't seem to let him go we live apart he's another city and I don't get to see him only like every few months sometimes none. I think that we are emotional independent on each other we text every day. I ended things a few months back I'm not sure how he...
    sunshineab sunshineab 26-30, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    My Husband's Best Freind

    I t was exactly 1 yr ago. I was so depressed and ready to give up on ever being happy. My husband at the time was being very emotionally and verbally abusive. I got an e-mail from my husband's best freind. He was wondering how we were doing, and needed to talk. He had just split...
    hotandcuddly hotandcuddly 51-55, F 44 Responses Sep 1, 2011

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    After reading some things yesterday about M&Ms

    it got me thinking about my ex and I bet my mm will veer his head this way again. I'm almost 99% positive he will. I don't sit back and hope he will like I used to before. There is a certain personality trait 1/2 of these mm carry. It's called control. Not all of them, some have...
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    HurtsEverywhere HurtsEverywhere 31-35, F 4 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    So after some thought

    and review of my own experience and others I have discovered the following. If you are involved in an affair there is something major missing from your marriage. We seem willing ( especially us women) to be used by our AP for their own satisfaction even at the expense of our...
    lovinglife11 lovinglife11 31-35, F 19 Responses Mar 27, 2014

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    I broke NC after over 100 days of NC.

    It was a bad decision and I regret doing it. I wanted answers because he faded away...we did not part on bad terms, no official break-up...just drifted apart. Derp down, I knew what was going on, I just wanted to hear from him. Long story short, he has moved on and I am no...
    Dreamgirl75 Dreamgirl75 36-40, F 13 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    What a storm in a teacup affairs really ARE.

    .. All contained within the walls of our hearts and minds, never to see the light of day. Haunting in their hidden beauty and their memorable "one liners". Covered with innuendos and lies just to have that one more hug, one more look, one more talk, one more kiss, then one more...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 23 Responses Oct 13, 2014

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    Doesn't it sound like

    when all you can write about is how much you got screwed over in cheating doesn't that sound like your not over it. Don't you think that this would oneday start missing with your marraige.
    tobad8 tobad8 41-45, M 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    It's been over for a year.

    The toughest year in my adult life. I believe like everyone, I have an innate emotional intelligence that will direct me to my personal bliss. The affair woke me up to passion, like nothing else has ever done before. I'm more empathic, less judgmental & more open minded than...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 15 Responses May 27, 2014

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    Omg has anyone seen the movie gone girl?

    !?! I would totally be like that wife. Best not to cross me. My evil streak is far to black. My husband would pay for cheating :) amazing Amy
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    I asked myself today,

    what did I learn from all this? The lesson for me is *Stay the heck away from a married man!* Until now, I kept convincing myself that he was separated when I met him.. his wife had a kid from another guy... she was a B and a User and a cheater.. yada yada yada. Time to fess...
    Fmina Fmina 51-55, F 46 Responses Feb 10

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    I spent more than eight hours today reading all

    the messages exchanged within our long distance relationship in the last twelve months. I can still remember my feelings associated with most of the sent messages vividly; but now I felt either muted or none of those emotions that were tormenting me at those points in time. I...
    FleetingThots FleetingThots 36-40, F 3 Responses 3 days ago

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    Feeling really good today.

    . Spent time with a the new MM man again yesterday..He's so into me, I love it! I will never ever waist my time again on a man that's not!
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 20 Responses Jan 23

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    Somebody said if they were my husband they

    would be upset with my stories and I wonder why???!! This is my place to vent.... My response to him is below. honestly I write it out to help myself get thru it. it's the right way for me. I can't lie and pretend the affair didn't happen. But I can speak real that we had great...
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I hope... ...Every day

    when you wake up, you miss the good morning texts and calls we shared. ...Every night you think about how we would say " goodnight love bug." ...When you see a woman with auburn hair, you think about how you loved to wrap my curls around your fingers when we kissed. ...You...
    Urbancowgirl Urbancowgirl 36-40 12 Responses Dec 16, 2013

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    Ok here is the sequel.

    I wrote about an affair I had with a married preacher, long story short my husband walked in and caught us. I haven't been with the preacher again since. BUT a year later I was online on my favorite social website and an old flame messaged me. He had tried to date me in...
    reddhot reddhot 51-55, F 5 Responses 6 days ago

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    Oh my goodness, I actually felt some emotions

    tonight. After going for a nice hike with a girlfriend, which I arranged so I would have a chance to tell her a little about my side of the story amongst other things, her and my BF show up to join us in some cocktails. As far as I know everything is fine all night. Our...
    wantingtobehappy84 wantingtobehappy84 22-25, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    Today, urged on by an EP friend,

    I deleted the Hotmail account that I had used exclusively, off and on, to correspond with my OW between 2006 and 2013. In there were the early love notes when we were exploring the possibility of crossing the line. I also kept some sad ones from the times that we were apart at...
    Wilbury Wilbury 41-45, M 21 Responses Jan 15, 2014

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    Everyone knows what the hell I went to in this

    town. My ex ap wife and I had mutual friends close mutual friends so when everyone found out everyone was first completely shocked at my doings. I mean my husband and I are best friends we are a loving couple, we have four beautiful beach babies that play sports and surf. We...
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 7 Responses a week ago

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    why do people like to call the ap women home

    wrecker??!! Come on... So sad to hear people say that.. It's ignorant, judge mental and so much more...truth is... If the home wasn't off to begin with the affair wouldn't have happened. It takes two people to make an affair work. So if anyone is a home wrecker it's the dam...
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 31 Responses Nov 19, 2014

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    Question how can a cheater say they would get

    revange or they could never forgive if there spouses cheats after they have need caught cheatinng.
    tobad8 tobad8 41-45, M 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    Affair With Son In Law, Now Pregnant

    I have searched all over the web for this situation and I have yet to find anything that remotely correlates.  I lost my job a few months ago and I moved in my eldest daughter and family.  I will admit right here and now that I have always had a crush on...
    littlejon63 littlejon63 46-50 352 Responses Mar 24, 2009

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    I am married with kids,

    he is also married with kids. Going on since last November. I'm addicted to him and our trysts. I tried to end it on numerous occasions because I know it is morally wrong. Obviously that didn't last. I love what we have and love him too. It will never happen between us...
    SexyMomma37 SexyMomma37 36-40, F 18 Responses Mar 13, 2014

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    An affair... The beginning: The best part.

    The getting to know each other, the can't get enough, the spark, the passion, the excitement, the fun, the romance, the constant communication, you won't fall in love The middle: Still passionate, still exciting, still fun, still communicating regularly, the romance is still...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 12 Responses Feb 22, 2014

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    What's the difference between being good

    friends with your ex and having an emotional affair? Sometimes I take one for the other. Are they really so different?
    FleetingThots FleetingThots 36-40, F 6 Responses