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I Had An Affair

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 13,873 People

    I am having a hard time letting go

    and feel tormented. For me, it is one of the worse feelings in the world when you want to talk to your lover and can't...or they are unresponsive to your requests...it hurts and there is nothing you can do about it because they don't belong to you. The memories and good times...
    Dreamgirl75 Dreamgirl75 36-40, F 23 Responses Apr 10

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    When it ended for me 9 months ago,

    I didn't want to hear about Time being the healing factor, because time was just an inanimate word and the burning pain in my chest and soul could not be soothed. Time was a vacuum.. a void. Being in 2 relationships never made sense to me. It's some kind of "temporary...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 10 Responses Jan 10

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    Affair With Son In Law, Now Pregnant

    I have searched all over the web for this situation and I have yet to find anything that remotely correlates.  I lost my job a few months ago and I moved in my eldest daughter and family.  I will admit right here and now that I have always had a crush on...
    littlejon63 littlejon63 46-50 354 Responses Mar 24, 2009

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    It's been over for a year.

    The toughest year in my adult life. I believe like everyone, I have an innate emotional intelligence that will direct me to my personal bliss. The affair woke me up to passion, like nothing else has ever done before. I'm more empathic, less judgmental & more open minded than...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 15 Responses May 27

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    Circlesnomore Circlesnomore 31-35, F 1 day ago

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    You ladies told me I will know

    when it's time to end things.. When the bad out weighs the good. This morning he really made me upset.. 600 am Is our time to talk text.. Been that way for a year.. He had no time.. It might seem to everyone that I'm needy.. But I don't ask for much at all.. We only see each...
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    Awkward moment tonight.

    ....went to dinner with my H and kids at a local hangout (one MM and I and our families use to frequent). We order and are sitting at a table talking, I see what looks like MM car pass in the parking lot, I'm almost 100% sure it's him, but about 5 minutes go by and he doesn't...
    Suzanne1976 Suzanne1976 36-40, F 20 Responses 6 days ago

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    So this is to the crazy guy I met on here.

    ....you know who you are. I tried to be friends/friendly with you. But you just aren't right for me. I decided to take your advice. I won't let you continue to take advantage of me anymore. You're right.....this feels good! So the next time you think you want to move here and...
    sallyanne44 sallyanne44 41-45, F 8 Responses a week ago

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    It's officially over!

    I saw his true side and I finally was strong enough to end it. I am hurting but relieved at the same time. This has definitely been a learning experience for me. :( I know in time I will get stronger each and everyday. Thank you to all to my EP friends for your support and...
    Cheeks2014 Cheeks2014 36-40, F 28 Responses Jan 19

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    It's been 5 months since I've seen my ex OM,

    3 months since we last spoke. I'm really missing him tonight . :-( thinking of him.:-(.
    js1276 js1276 36-40, F 7 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    I have been in EP for a few months,

    read many stories here, particularly in this experience and other post about had an affair. Just amazed, how easily other shallow peoples tried to judged other person when they have read the experience. Some of us, didn't have plan to be the other woman. And some of MM are also...
    ssally123 ssally123 41-45, F 19 Responses Jan 4

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    Havnt cried about you in awhile.

    I feel it coming on today. every now and then I really do miss you. I can't explain what I miss because I don't even know if what I miss was real ... It feels like a dream these days. Don't even know if I could cry if I wanted too , I just know the feeling exists today :( I...
    Circlesnomore Circlesnomore 31-35, F 5 Responses 2 days ago

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    I Could Help It

    It started about 4 months ago in the grocery store i caughgt a guy about 23 watching me it kind of creaped me out and excited me at the same time seeing that my husband isnt interested anymore.So i paid for my things and headed for my car. As i turned around that guy had folloed...
    imsweetenough imsweetenough 31-35, F 205 Responses Dec 30, 2011

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    I need to break the addiction of being in this

    4 year affair. He wants more and it's unfair for me to strung him along. For those who finally let go, how did you end it ?? I have ended it several times and the longest I went was three months no contact. Help !
    timetochange2 timetochange2 41-45, F 4 Responses Sep 22

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    An affair... The beginning: The best part.

    The getting to know each other, the can't get enough, the spark, the passion, the excitement, the fun, the romance, the constant communication, you won't fall in love The middle: Still passionate, still exciting, still fun, still communicating regularly, the romance is still...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 9 Responses Feb 22

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    Guys why would you randomly walked past a girl

    or even just standing there talking to her and just mess up her hair. Even to the point to where it's in her eyes and she can't see?
    tc57 tc57 31-35, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    I'm married to a wonderful man

    and have two beautiful children but I have been having an affair with a MM for over a year. It's been a tremendous experience for me, both good and bad, and I don't know if I ever want it to end. Lots to talk about sometime but just saying hi to you all for now. I'm so glad I...
    Wikedangel Wikedangel 36-40, F 19 Responses Jan 4

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    Dear Jonathan And Our Two Children.....i'm So Sorry.

    Tomorrow 01/13/13 is the1 year anniversary of my relationship with the man I'm having an affair with, the man I compromised my entire life for, the man I chose over my family when I got caught 6 months ago, and the man I currently live with today. And 1 year ago tomorrow I...
    Annie3321 Annie3321 26-30, F 86 Responses Jan 12, 2013

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    Update: Still going strong with my secret love.

    .. I still think about how wrong this is. Every minute, every text....every stolen kiss and every intense moment we share. If it's so wrong, why in the hell does it feel so right?? I asked my husband what would happen if I ever cheated on him... What would he think, what...
    Chelsea84 Chelsea84 26-30, F 20 Responses Feb 8

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    What I worry about most is

    if something happened to you, I would never know....
    belgiumgirl10 belgiumgirl10 41-45, F 11 Responses 2 days ago

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    "How do you know for sure you loved him?

    " "Because it feels like someone died. You don't grieve lust."
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 10 Responses Mar 22

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    The one thing you people don't get is

    once you cheat and get caught witch most do your branded the cheater. Your spouse my be the biggest *** on earth and a ****** person but if you cheat your the one that destroyed the marriage. That's the way the world looks at it. And the reason being is because you have...
    pleasestoplying pleasestoplying 51-55, M 8 Responses a week ago

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    I hung out with my SG last night

    and he's heartbroken, he just wants a legit girlfriend and I can't be that for him, I have to let him go and live his life, I'm so sad for him and I'm not really sure how I feel about myself, sad, ashamed, happy, it's bittersweet, I never thought I'd be in this position in my...
    mntmama mntmama 36-40, F 5 Responses Sep 22

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    “If you hang out with chickens,

    you're going to cluck and if you hang out with eagles, you're going to fly.”
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    No not really. Sorry to disappoint you

    but you ladies in your 40s might want to hear this anyway. I have been crazy with thoughts about affairs and really any idiot has been looking like Brad Pitt to me since last December. I was unhappy, depressed and even put myself in the situations that could have ended up with...
    discovery5 discovery5 41-45, F 14 Responses Apr 25

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    This is my first post.

    .. We met in college and were immediately infatuated with each other, but were never together back then... Fast forward 21 years now... I have been married for 13 years with one child. My MM has been married for 6 years with no children. We were together for about 11 months...
    Koalaclover Koalaclover 36-40, F 13 Responses Sep 23

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    My ex sent me a email today about my daughter

    wedding coming up in jan see didn't get invited lol. Some time I wonder where her head is at like I'm going to do anything about it. She burnt that bride 10 years ago. Why would she think I would even try talking to her. Karma sure is nice sometimes lol.
    pleasestoplying pleasestoplying 51-55, M 9 Responses 5 days ago

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    No, I had a pliffair.

    Don't know what it is but I am sure I had it.
    discovery5 discovery5 41-45, F 7 Responses 3 days ago

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    I would appreciate support

    and advice, no judgements please. Background: I am married almost 10 years, 2 kids. Years of issues with husband, he is a bit better, but I am no longer in love with him. Too much water under the bridge, I tried to separate from him a few times. He knows i am not "in love" with...
    Sexymamma16 Sexymamma16 31-35, F 9 Responses 5 days ago

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    I heard this song today.

    Its apparently an old Hannah Montana song but the chorus really struck me - trying to make sense of all of these emotions inside! The feelings we shared for each other were amazing and real. I miss him so much...... Everyday that we had all the good all the bad I'll keep...
    lostinlove0116 lostinlove0116 36-40, F 1 Response Sep 23

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    I have really been missing my OW lately.

    I hate to admit it to be honest. I kind of feel stuck. It's been months since I spoke to her even! I'm really working on not having a "lazy mind" which I kind of refer to as not letting my thoughts run when I am reminded of her but I keep missing her especially the last two...
    mylove77 mylove77 36-40, M 6 Responses 4 days ago

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    Does anybody have any long detailed stories

    about their affair? Message me if you don't know what I mean. Thanks I would really enjoy reading them
    dirtysocks23 dirtysocks23 22-25, M 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    Today, urged on by an EP friend,

    I deleted the Hotmail account that I had used exclusively, off and on, to correspond with my OW between 2006 and 2013. In there were the early love notes when we were exploring the possibility of crossing the line. I also kept some sad ones from the times that we were apart at...
    Wilbury Wilbury 41-45, M 18 Responses Jan 15

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    He Doesn'T Know

    But I'm getting ready to leave him. He doesn't know. The love of my life. The most beautiful man that should be mine. All the promises I made him. I will break. He won't leave me ever. He has no reason to. I can't compartmentaliZe. Im not a box. And he's my world. The playing...
    mysecretworld mysecretworld 36-40, F 16 Responses Nov 4, 2013

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    expression "Once a Cheater Always a

    Cheater" Does it apply to both genders or to men only?:)
    kimlife kimlife 26-30, F 16 Responses 2 days ago

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    Do you ever wish you could meet done of the

    friends you have made on here.....the ones who know everything about you but never judge you? We can't have these conversations with our friends (or many of them. I think we all have at least one that we trust enough to tell) ....they might judge/spill our secrets. But out...
    sallyanne44 sallyanne44 41-45, F 20 Responses Jul 30

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    Shocking Love Affair

    I must confess something here that I thought, I would never ever talk about in my life. But I have to admit, I had an affair. Yes I did, and now I have to live with it for the rest of my life. Here's my shocking story..... About two weeks ago, I cheated on my true love...I...
    JimMorrisonRocks JimMorrisonRocks 26-30, M 26 Responses Jun 25, 2012

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    Would you become suspicious of your MM

    if he would go to whats app rather than answering to your texts on social network?
    kimlife kimlife 26-30, F 4 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    Maybe you're reading this

    because you are having an affair or had one already or maybe you are thinking about doing it. I can't give advice because I have no clue. All I know is I am recovering and it's been a long recovery. I think the most surprising aspect was the emotion that came with this...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 19 Responses Jan 4

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    More Like, 'my Affair Had Me'

    my affair did have me - for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. it chewed me up, spit me out, and i have yet to recover. we were in love, and probably still are (i definitely am) but ultimately it was my choice to end it - i didnt want to end my marriage for various reasons and knew...
    IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm 31-35, F 26 Responses Dec 26, 2011

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    So I am beginning to see

    that my ap is a total narcissist. He's a master manipulator. He totally won me over and I fell head over heels for him. Over the past 2.5 years, I have been up and down so many times I can't even count. But the other day, I told him I was turning off the app he uses to text me...
    sallyanne44 sallyanne44 41-45, F 4 Responses a week ago

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    Right this is my first really positive post on

    here...those of you in despair, trapped in your marriage, long for your ap, check this out... I finally got myself sorted, got through the heartache, got over my depression, got in really good shape to make myself happy. Still longed for my ap everyday though... but no contact...
    LionCaged LionCaged 26-30, M 5 Responses 2 days ago

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    I am married with kids,

    he is also married with kids. Going on since last November. I'm addicted to him and our trysts. I tried to end it on numerous occasions because I know it is morally wrong. Obviously that didn't last. I love what we have and love him too. It will never happen between us...
    SexyMomma37 SexyMomma37 36-40, F 16 Responses Mar 13

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    So after some thought

    and review of my own experience and others I have discovered the following. If you are involved in an affair there is something major missing from your marriage. We seem willing ( especially us women) to be used by our AP for their own satisfaction even at the expense of our...
    lovinglife11 lovinglife11 31-35, F 21 Responses Mar 27

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    Two Lovers, One Night.

    I'm afraid this is going to make me sound slutty. That is not really the case, i have just had weak moments in my life. I’m going to leave a lot of the mundane details out of this story to make it more interesting. This did happen several years ago but by highlighting the...
    emstioy emstioy 46-50, F 67 Responses Jan 8, 2012

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    If I smother my MM with texts.

    .. Get all girly girly on him ... Maybe it will drive him to end this... Then it doesn't have to be me. Have any of you ladies tried to purposely push them into ending things? I got myself into this and I'm not woman enough to get myself out of it... I can't walk...
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 2 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    He text me last night

    and my heart jumped. I desperately wanted to respond but I didn't. He wanted to see me over the weekend but I didn't meet him. I love him so much and want to lie in his arms like I used to. But I can't. I know it's not a good situation for me. I can not take the guilt that comes...
    Australianladybug Australianladybug 31-35, F 17 Responses Mar 3

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    Full of adrenaline right now!

    That overwhelming feeling, smiling far too much and tingling from actual adrenaline running throughout my body! Not from affair excitement-I don't understand that, it's not exiting because of that- I'm just excited to see the man that makes me feel alive!!
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 31 Responses Jun 18

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    I fell off the wagon

    and emailed him about an hour ago. It's been 3 days of no contact and also since I told him that we can't be friends anymore as keeping a friendship with each other will likely rekindle our affair. It's been 3 weeks since he broke up with me (20 days today to be exact). I...
    Koalaclover Koalaclover 36-40, F 6 Responses 6 days ago

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    I have come full circle with my affair.

    .. This was the most beautiful yet unhealthiest relationship I have ever engaged in.... I trashed my self esteem, my morals and my heart for this relationship. I loved with every fiber in my body and every cell of my brain yet I was slowly reduced to a friend with no possibility...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 11 Responses Dec 17, 2013

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    I hope... ...Every day

    when you wake up, you miss the good morning texts and calls we shared. ...Every night you think about how we would say " goodnight love bug." ...When you see a woman with auburn hair, you think about how you loved to wrap my curls around your fingers when we kissed. ...You...
    Urbancowgirl Urbancowgirl 36-40 10 Responses Dec 16, 2013

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    Dear Haters: I would like to give you an

    insight of a person that is currently involved in having an affair and giving this insight might give you a different opinion of us...might not agree with our actions but never judge someone before you know the entire story....so here it goes... We are human...we are daughters...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 35 Responses Sep 16

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    What is the difference between an Affair V.

    S. Friends with Benefit?? I am not talking about marriage or single status but the relationship aspect. I am not even sure what I have.
    myheart99 myheart99 36-40, F 9 Responses 3 days ago

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