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I Had An Affair

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 15,073 People

    Dear Haters: I would like to give you an

    insight of a person that is currently involved in having an affair and giving this insight might give you a different opinion of us...might not agree with our actions but never judge someone before you know the entire story....so here it goes... We are human...we are daughters...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 36 Responses Sep 16, 2014

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    I'm an affair success story.

    In a short period of time, my life took a direction that I never thought possible. I never saw it coming, did things I never thought I was ever capable of, and struggled through some turmoil...but it took my life in a direction that was best for me. This is quite long, as I'm...
    happyasever happyasever 31-35, F 7 Responses Nov 23, 2014

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    I am curious for those of you

    that are married and have ended your affair...how is your marriage doing? Have you been able to reconnect with your spouse after the affair? If so, how?
    StartingOver41 StartingOver41 41-45, F 5 Responses 2 days ago

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    This morning, we talked.

    More like old friends than ex-lovers. And it feels good.
    idgirl84 idgirl84 31-35, F 3 Responses 4 days ago

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    I Could Help It

    It started about 4 months ago in the grocery store i caughgt a guy about 23 watching me it kind of creaped me out and excited me at the same time seeing that my husband isnt interested anymore.So i paid for my things and headed for my car. As i turned around that guy had folloed...
    imsweetenough imsweetenough 31-35, F 179 Responses Dec 30, 2011

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    We had met and got instantly lost in a riveting

    conversation at an evening function. Looking around after a while, we noted the place had emptied. Standing alone, we were the last two people to leave. Time had stood still. We giggled and parted politely, promising to chat again soon. A month or so later, I saw you at a...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 12 Responses May 6, 2015

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    Xmm STILL tells me he loves me.

    On the phone. Like today. Sometimes, I'm resentful and don't answer his calls. When my resentment subsides, I pick up again. When I rationalize as to why he does this, I think of the Coldplay song "I fix you", as I know it took a whole lot of compromise for him to end us...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 8 Responses 4 days ago

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    An affair... The beginning: The best part.

    The getting to know each other, the can't get enough, the spark, the passion, the excitement, the fun, the romance, the constant communication, you won't fall in love The middle: Still passionate, still exciting, still fun, still communicating regularly, the romance is still...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 14 Responses Feb 22, 2014

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    More Like, 'my Affair Had Me'

    my affair did have me - for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. it chewed me up, spit me out, and i have yet to recover. we were in love, and probably still are (i definitely am) but ultimately it was my choice to end it - i didnt want to end my marriage for various reasons and knew...
    IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm 31-35, F 23 Responses Dec 26, 2011

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    I'm going to spend time with him today.

    . His text "wear shear white panties please...And no bra.. I want to lick you with your panties on... It's been a long while babe since I felt this way..." He brings out My sexual desires...
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 4 Responses 6 days ago

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    Dear Wife, Your husband has been cheating on

    you for 10 years with all different women, he never engaged in relationships, just sex. Until he met me. The first time it happened, I felt bad, but not really, it was only going to be that once. Of course, though, it didn't stay that way. After then we got to know each...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 10 Responses Feb 13, 2015

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    I really miss my ex mm.

    It's been months since we had any contact. I've had more contact with the W. I hope that some day we will be able to talk again. I miss our conversations. He was so easy to talk too.
    Mshine944 Mshine944 41-45, F 5 Responses 5 days ago

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    Maybe you're reading this

    because you are having an affair or had one already or maybe you are thinking about doing it. I can't give advice because I have no clue. All I know is I am recovering and it's been a long recovery. I think the most surprising aspect was the emotion that came with this...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 17 Responses Jan 4, 2014

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      I'm back for my advice.

    Under a different name as for some reason I can't access my old account (old name dolly2016) I have decided to do some counselling and my first session will be next week. As my break up was solely my fault I am starting to believe I will never find any one as good as him...
    Dollygirl2016 Dollygirl2016 26-30, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    Wanted to thank those

    who have read my story and offered support. I think just getting it out is going to be the most helpful. For 15 years I told not a soul. I need the support to put this behind me, to help me make fresh healthy choices and to forgive myself. I understand the argument that I am...
    pumpgirl pumpgirl 46-50, F 11 Responses Jan 31

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    After two years of random calls

    and texts from xmm, we finally met. It was friendly and sweet and had a touch of the surreal to it. I wasn't meeting him to rekindle anything, nor was he. I'm certainly not interested in anything like that after all I've been through to recover my own sanity and peace...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 13 Responses May 28, 2015

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    Affair With Son In Law, Now Pregnant

    I have searched all over the web for this situation and I have yet to find anything that remotely correlates.  I lost my job a few months ago and I moved in my eldest daughter and family.  I will admit right here and now that I have always had a crush on...
    littlejon63 littlejon63 46-50 351 Responses Mar 24, 2009

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    I hope... ...Every day

    when you wake up, you miss the good morning texts and calls we shared. ...Every night you think about how we would say " goodnight love bug." ...When you see a woman with auburn hair, you think about how you loved to wrap my curls around your fingers when we kissed. ...You...
    Urbancowgirl Urbancowgirl 36-40 12 Responses Dec 16, 2013

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    I asked myself today,

    what did I learn from all this? The lesson for me is *Stay the heck away from a married man!* Until now, I kept convincing myself that he was separated when I met him.. his wife had a kid from another guy... she was a B and a User and a cheater.. yada yada yada. Time to fess...
    Fmina Fmina 51-55, F 37 Responses Feb 10, 2015

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    I am a father of 2 boys.

    I've been married over a decade. I am a professional with a career, home and financial security. I have loving parents, loving dog and good friends. I am able to enjoy my sports teams and hit the gym 5 days a week. I am also an addict. As nat king cole sang, some call it...
    MyThermopylae MyThermopylae 46-50, M 15 Responses Nov 3, 2014

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    We've been on and off

    for 3.5 years now. Mostly on. The off- when I don't think there will be an end, that he will never leave her. They're in mediation, but it's going so slow...I feel like I enable it, the marriage, the long drawn out process toward divorce, because I support him emotionally...
    Journeys2013 Journeys2013 41-45, F 1 Response a week ago

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    Expererience1954 I think you need to leave this

    group. By your experiences listed you have no need to be in this group. If you can't find anything nice to say then don't say anything at all. Not to mention you only ream those whom you pick so stop being a bully and move on. I say that because you responded to one of my post...
    Aloha2erhz Aloha2erhz 31-35, F 6 Responses Jan 31

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    why do people like to call the ap women home

    wrecker??!! Come on... So sad to hear people say that.. It's ignorant, judge mental and so much more...truth is... If the home wasn't off to begin with the affair wouldn't have happened. It takes two people to make an affair work. So if anyone is a home wrecker it's the dam...
    ventingagain ventingagain 36-40, F 27 Responses Nov 19, 2014

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    Today, urged on by an EP friend,

    I deleted the Hotmail account that I had used exclusively, off and on, to correspond with my OW between 2006 and 2013. In there were the early love notes when we were exploring the possibility of crossing the line. I also kept some sad ones from the times that we were apart at...
    Wilbury Wilbury 46-50, M 17 Responses Jan 15, 2014

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    Writing within the realm of salvageable

    marriages, I'm thinking, maybe one of the reasons why we have NC relapses is because we haven't really committed ourselves in repairing our marriages. Maybe ... we've gotten so used to enjoying the connections with our APs that we've forgotten how to connect back to our spouses...
    SundayGlory33 SundayGlory33 31-35, F 6 Responses 5 days ago

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    Do you ever wish you could meet done of the

    friends you have made on here.....the ones who know everything about you but never judge you? We can't have these conversations with our friends (or many of them. I think we all have at least one that we trust enough to tell) ....they might judge/spill our secrets. But out...
    sallyanne44 sallyanne44 46-50, F 14 Responses Jul 30, 2014

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    I have come full circle with my affair.

    .. This was the most beautiful yet unhealthiest relationship I have ever engaged in.... I trashed my self esteem, my morals and my heart for this relationship. I loved with every fiber in my body and every cell of my brain yet I was slowly reduced to a friend with no possibility...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 8 Responses Dec 17, 2013

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    What a storm in a teacup affairs really ARE.

    .. All contained within the walls of our hearts and minds, never to see the light of day. Haunting in their hidden beauty and their memorable "one liners". Covered with innuendos and lies just to have that one more hug, one more look, one more talk, one more kiss, then one more...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 22 Responses Oct 13, 2014

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    It's been over two months

    since his unexplained NC. The ups and downs I go through are so hard. Funny that I was nearly feet from him, and his wife, on Friday night (I was in a room next to him at an office)... And he still didn't contact me. I've started to realize that I quite possibly was his bipolar...
    infusedheart infusedheart 31-35, F 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    Shocking Love Affair

    I must confess something here that I thought, I would never ever talk about in my life. But I have to admit, I had an affair. Yes I did, and now I have to live with it for the rest of my life. Here's my shocking story..... About two weeks ago, I cheated on my true love...I...
    LongLiveRockAndRoll LongLiveRockAndRoll 26-30, M 28 Responses Jun 25, 2012

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    His text, "I know we belong together,

    and we most certainly will never get the chance. That kills me. But i wouldn't trade the time I had with you for anything. I love you more than I'll ever be able to describe. I will never stop loving and missing you. Goodbye sweetheart." :'( :'( I cant breath, im gonna cry. I...
    idgirl84 idgirl84 31-35, F 21 Responses 3 days ago

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    So I still have him on social media not Facebook

    but Insta etc so not detailed family stuff part of me wants to leave him on there so he can see how much fun I am having which I'm not but can always be faked on social media but then I don't want to post anything cause I don't want him to know what I'm doing he lost that right...
    maydaygirl maydaygirl 36-40, F 4 Responses Jan 30

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    It's wasn't exactly an affair I'm single he has

    a girlfriend it's not gone past texting I felt like he was slow fading me out so I just stopped texting so did he has been 2 weeks now was starting to feel better then he goes and likes my photo on Instagram ...why do I always want what I can't have why do I always want the guys...
    winterusa winterusa 36-40, F 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    All the while I thought she was the vulnerable

    one. She ripped my eyeballs out with meat hooks.
    PhinheasGage PhinheasGage 46-50, M 19 Responses Jan 30

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    I have cheated quite a lot,

    I'm a teenager it's not so uncommon but right now I am in a happy relationship and even greater an open one lol. As long I don't cheat emotionally I'm fine.
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jan 31

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    Dear Jonathan And Our Two Children.....i'm So Sorry.

    Tomorrow 01/13/13 is the1 year anniversary of my relationship with the man I'm having an affair with, the man I compromised my entire life for, the man I chose over my family when I got caught 6 months ago, and the man I currently live with today. And 1 year ago tomorrow I...
    Annie3321 Annie3321 26-30, F 84 Responses Jan 12, 2013

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    Rough day of NC. Ugh.

    ... But, I did it. At least I have my wine to end the day.
    RLaney RLaney 36-40, F 3 Responses 3 days ago

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    I am preparing to leave my husband.

    Not because of the affair, but for me and to spare him pain in the future. I sign my lease this week. I'm excited and scared. Wish me luck!
    Runnergirl2015 Runnergirl2015 31-35, F 8 Responses 2 days ago

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    I guess me and her might be over

    and at this precise moment I'm pretty cool with it *shrugs* I hope you're all well x
    LionCaged LionCaged 26-30, M 2 Responses Jan 31

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    with a married man that ended tragically.

    I was left devastated, hurt, confused and an empty shell of a woman. All that I ever wanted in life was to be successful at any and everything I touched. I have a great career, loving family and a few close friends. I thought my life was content but needed a loving partner to...
    Hunniebae Hunniebae 26-30, F 10 Responses Apr 1, 2015

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    Feeling really good today.

    . Spent time with a the new MM man again yesterday..He's so into me, I love it! I will never ever waist my time again on a man that's not!
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 17 Responses Jan 23, 2015

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    So after some thought

    and review of my own experience and others I have discovered the following. If you are involved in an affair there is something major missing from your marriage. We seem willing ( especially us women) to be used by our AP for their own satisfaction even at the expense of our...
    Freedomnow01 Freedomnow01 31-35, F 17 Responses Mar 27, 2014

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    I got married to my partner in September 2015

    after 9 years together 2 months before the wedding i started an affair which lasted right up to the week before the wedding and i seen him once after. My partner found out 10 weeks after we got married and left me. It has been 7 weeks and whilst I am slowly accepting the...
    dolly2016 dolly2016 26-30, F 13 Responses 6 days ago

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    It's been over for a year.

    The toughest year in my adult life. I believe like everyone, I have an innate emotional intelligence that will direct me to my personal bliss. The affair woke me up to passion, like nothing else has ever done before. I'm more empathic, less judgmental & more open minded than...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 11 Responses May 27, 2014

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    I'm married to a wonderful man

    and have two beautiful children but I have been having an affair with a MM for over a year. It's been a tremendous experience for me, both good and bad, and I don't know if I ever want it to end. Lots to talk about sometime but just saying hi to you all for now. I'm so glad I...
    Wikedangel Wikedangel 41-45, F 16 Responses Jan 4, 2014

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