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I Had An Affair

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 13,602 People

    Urgh I'm being ridiculous tonight!

    Waiting for a txt to come through so I could work out how long he stayed out for, if that meant he met someone else tonight, etc etc. ok so I fell asleep two hours ago so not too much waiting and he txt as I fell asleep! But how ridiculous I am allowing myself to be consumed by...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 4 Responses 2 days ago

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    I hope... ...Every day

    when you wake up, you miss the good morning texts and calls we shared. ...Every night you think about how we would say " goodnight love bug." ...When you see a woman with auburn hair, you think about how you loved to wrap my curls around your fingers when we kissed. ...You...
    Urbancowgirl Urbancowgirl 36-40 10 Responses Dec 16, 2013

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    I have come full circle with my affair.

    .. This was the most beautiful yet unhealthiest relationship I have ever engaged in.... I trashed my self esteem, my morals and my heart for this relationship. I loved with every fiber in my body and every cell of my brain yet I was slowly reduced to a friend with no possibility...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 11 Responses Dec 17, 2013

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    Two Lovers, One Night.

    I'm afraid this is going to make me sound slutty. That is not really the case, i have just had weak moments in my life. I’m going to leave a lot of the mundane details out of this story to make it more interesting. This did happen several years ago but by highlighting the...
    emstioy emstioy 46-50, F 67 Responses Jan 8, 2012

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    So after some thought

    and review of my own experience and others I have discovered the following. If you are involved in an affair there is something major missing from your marriage. We seem willing ( especially us women) to be used by our AP for their own satisfaction even at the expense of our...
    lovinglife11 lovinglife11 31-35, F 18 Responses Mar 27

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    After no reply to my asking

    for a meeting for closure, I went ahead and sent a message saying everything I needed to say. I know he won't reply. Probably for the best. Today starts my counting of no contact, I will not let myself send anymore messages. I just can't take the hurt and rejection anymore. I...
    Suzanne1976 Suzanne1976 36-40, F 9 Responses 2 days ago

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    Thank god it's over..

    .. There's no more lying, hiding, or making excuses! It feels so good, like this weight has been lifted from my whole life! I thought I wanted to maintain a friendship, but I've learned it's not possible, for me anyway. Most situations are all very different, but truth is...
    platnum2011 platnum2011 26-30, F 10 Responses 4 days ago

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    I'm seeing my mm for a couple of hours today.

    im so excited.missed him so much whilst away on vacation.Even though been in contact daily with a few hundred texts it's still been hard.
    sooty1977 sooty1977 36-40, F 3 Responses 4 days ago

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    Maybe you're reading this

    because you are having an affair or had one already or maybe you are thinking about doing it. I can't give advice because I have no clue. All I know is I am recovering and it's been a long recovery. I think the most surprising aspect was the emotion that came with this...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 18 Responses Jan 4

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    "How do you know for sure you loved him?

    " "Because it feels like someone died. You don't grieve lust."
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 10 Responses Mar 22

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    I'm married to a wonderful man

    and have two beautiful children but I have been having an affair with a MM for over a year. It's been a tremendous experience for me, both good and bad, and I don't know if I ever want it to end. Lots to talk about sometime but just saying hi to you all for now. I'm so glad I...
    Wikedangel Wikedangel 36-40, F 19 Responses Jan 4

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    I remember him tracing his finger over t

    forehead and writing 'I love you' with it. Just two months ago. To get back that moment..... Not sure what path we are on or how far along we are...I know we have technically finished, he's single, I'm not officially, and we have so far arranged three upcoming 'dates' in the...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    The song Stay With Me by Sam Smith is stuck in

    my head. I can hear, and feel his emotions so much through his voice. So relatable, except for me, I believe it is love. I'm going to keep my head up, and make it through another day without contacting him, even though I want to so bad. I think for me a big part of the blow...
    Ditto85 Ditto85 26-30 4 Responses 2 days ago

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    Shocking Love Affair

    I must confess something here that I thought, I would never ever talk about in my life. But I have to admit, I had an affair. Yes I did, and now I have to live with it for the rest of my life. Here's my shocking story..... About two weeks ago, I cheated on my true love...I...
    JimMorrisonRocks JimMorrisonRocks 26-30, M 26 Responses Jun 25, 2012

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    I Could Help It

    It started about 4 months ago in the grocery store i caughgt a guy about 23 watching me it kind of creaped me out and excited me at the same time seeing that my husband isnt interested anymore.So i paid for my things and headed for my car. As i turned around that guy had folloed...
    imsweetenough imsweetenough 31-35, F 207 Responses Dec 30, 2011

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    He Doesn'T Know

    But I'm getting ready to leave him. He doesn't know. The love of my life. The most beautiful man that should be mine. All the promises I made him. I will break. He won't leave me ever. He has no reason to. I can't compartmentaliZe. Im not a box. And he's my world. The playing...
    mysecretworld mysecretworld 36-40, F 15 Responses Nov 4, 2013

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    It's officially over!

    I saw his true side and I finally was strong enough to end it. I am hurting but relieved at the same time. This has definitely been a learning experience for me. :( I know in time I will get stronger each and everyday. Thank you to all to my EP friends for your support and...
    Cheeks2014 Cheeks2014 36-40, F 28 Responses Jan 19

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    I looked at the photo

    and letter he gave me. first I saw a good looking man than I looked again and saw all his faults in his face. He used to be beautiful to me but he's really not that good looking.. Haha I saw his little ears and weird smile. And then I looked again and he even begun to look...
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 2 days ago

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    Another late night chat,

    late night "text" chats are reserved for me..... Yes we chat 2 - 3 hours a few times a week and other days the regular "hi, how are you" or "good night" , occasionally we have no contact for approx. 3 days, which kills me. Because text/ phone call is all I have.we see each other...
    zoey3000 zoey3000 31-35, F 4 Responses 2 days ago

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    After I found out the affair,

    after the initial denials, my husband ultimately severed contact with his AP. He had created a email account just for her and cleared that out too and had not used it for almost a year now. He also made sure to share all his passwords with me to assure me that he is not in...
    missingherbigtime missingherbigtime 31-35, F 7 Responses 2 days ago

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    Letmecheckyourshorts Letmecheckyourshorts 22-25, F 56 Responses Jan 12

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    My Last Letter, That You'Ll Never Get...

    Like a spark to gasoline, your subtle negativity, actions and words concerning your discontent with him lit a fire of hope for me over the past few months - that you would be free for us to be together one day... until yesterday that is. Your words - "yes, I am for sure getting...
    engx74 engx74 36-40, M 10 Responses Sep 8, 2013

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    It wasn't so much an affair

    as it was a ******* or 5. During one my husband walked up to the car and caught me. I thought I was in so much trouble. Within two days my husband was begging me to **** the other guy and let him watch.
    greenmountainmomma greenmountainmomma 31-35, F 18 Responses Jan 30

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    Ok question : how many of you met someone off

    of pof ? Nerveous? What happened when u first saw them and if you thought they were not cute etc, but looked cute in their pics ? Or if you liked then was there chemistry ? I'm meeting someone for the first time off there, he looks cute in his pics but some pics he aver me...
    js1276 js1276 36-40, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    I've been feeling tempted to use a real photo

    of myself as my profile pic, but am concerned of someone I may know from real life seeing me. Has anyone on here used a photo of themselves, and gotten caught by anyone you know personally?
    Ditto85 Ditto85 26-30 3 Responses 4 days ago

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    He text me last night

    and my heart jumped. I desperately wanted to respond but I didn't. He wanted to see me over the weekend but I didn't meet him. I love him so much and want to lie in his arms like I used to. But I can't. I know it's not a good situation for me. I can not take the guilt that comes...
    Australianladybug Australianladybug 31-35, F 17 Responses Mar 3

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    It's been over for a year.

    The toughest year in my adult life. I believe like everyone, I have an innate emotional intelligence that will direct me to my personal bliss. The affair woke me up to passion, like nothing else has ever done before. I'm more empathic, less judgmental & more open minded than...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 14 Responses May 27

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    Today, urged on by an EP friend,

    I deleted the Hotmail account that I had used exclusively, off and on, to correspond with my OW between 2006 and 2013. In there were the early love notes when we were exploring the possibility of crossing the line. I also kept some sad ones from the times that we were apart at...
    Wilbury Wilbury 41-45, M 17 Responses Jan 15

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    I've posted my affair story,

    so not going to repeat. I've finished my Affair, which is why this title says, I HAD an affair. It's been 5 months since I was together with the woman I had an affair with while both of us were married. Our affair lasted for 5 years, 2 years within my marriage and 4 years...
    OnAlert OnAlert 56-60, M 11 Responses 3 days ago

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    With an old friend of mine he was

    so much more gentle then the man I love . Our sex was so much more passionate the compatibility was amazing but still I can't be with him . I can't leave my man.
    Sincerelynia Sincerelynia 18-21, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I'm in the phase of accepting the fact

    that it's really over. My emotions have been pretty up and down this week. One moment I feel ok, and the next I'm hurting again. I've dreamt about him every single night since he ended it. One dream felt so real. It was the type where you wake up, and have to come to before you...
    Ditto85 Ditto85 26-30 8 Responses 3 days ago

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    Dear Jonathan And Our Two Children.....i'm So Sorry.

    Tomorrow 01/13/13 is the1 year anniversary of my relationship with the man I'm having an affair with, the man I compromised my entire life for, the man I chose over my family when I got caught 6 months ago, and the man I currently live with today. And 1 year ago tomorrow I...
    Annie3321 Annie3321 26-30, F 86 Responses Jan 12, 2013

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    I was married to a man

    for 20 years. We met when I was 16, got married when I was 22, and went on to have 3 kids. The only problem was he drank and over the years, his personality changed to the point of abuse. It was not physical abuse but verbal. He did things like swear at me, punch holes in the...
    leslie0718 leslie0718 41-45, F 12 Responses Feb 4

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    Goodbye.......... This is an update to a story

    I wrote on May 20th about my affair coming to an end. Since I initially wrote this story, things had taken a turn. Initially, the turn of events was very positive. After a period of time, my OW started emailing again. Over the course of a few weeks, our chat sessions got...
    bobrido bobrido 46-50, M 9 Responses 4 days ago

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    Just a thought..and I might get alot of sh*t

    for this but I had an affair and it really f*cked me up (read my posts!) and I will never do that again!! Now my thought is for those of you who are still actively looking for an affair..if u love your husband/wife too much to leave them and break their heart, then surely you...
    Greggerz Greggerz 26-30, M 4 Responses 4 days ago

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    I am having a hard time letting go

    and feel tormented. For me, it is one of the worse feelings in the world when you want to talk to your lover and can't...or they are unresponsive to your requests...it hurts and there is nothing you can do about it because they don't belong to you. The memories and good times...
    Dreamgirl75 Dreamgirl75 36-40, F 23 Responses Apr 10

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    I am married with kids,

    he is also married with kids. Going on since last November. I'm addicted to him and our trysts. I tried to end it on numerous occasions because I know it is morally wrong. Obviously that didn't last. I love what we have and love him too. It will never happen between us...
    SexyMomma37 SexyMomma37 36-40, F 15 Responses Mar 13

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    You know it's sad when people think god is

    involved in there cheating. God is never in evil things and cheating is evil anyway you put it. God turns he's head to cheaters.
    Soevil9 Soevil9 51-55, M 2 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    My Husband's Best Freind

    I t was exactly 1 yr ago. I was so depressed and ready to give up on ever being happy. My husband at the time was being very emotionally and verbally abusive. I got an e-mail from my husband's best freind. He was wondering how we were doing, and needed to talk. He had just split...
    hotandcuddly hotandcuddly 51-55, F 45 Responses Sep 1, 2011

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    I met him at a masquerade.

    It felt like that moment he and I connected on a soul level . I have never experienced anything like that in my life. I know he felt the same. Over time things got more intense between us and even though he was in a relationship. We had agreed that we were just going to try to...
    MrGibbs23 MrGibbs23 26-30, F 4 days ago

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    So my ex mm (who's now single

    and was not exactly married, just girlfriend) is still in constant contact with me (the married one). I mean constant-second he wakes up to the moment he sleeps. We both instigate talking. He's also instigated two lots of naughty txting this week...we never really did this...
    foreverWantingMore foreverWantingMore 31-35, F 6 Responses 13 hrs ago

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    Masters of sex.. On showtime.

    .it's a great series that we can all relate to it.. Drink some wine and enjoy.
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 4 Responses 3 days ago

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    This is to the spouses that

    so called friend cheated with your spouses guess what there not your friends because true friends don't stab the other one in the back. A true friend would tell that friend about there spouse. So people your better of with out them there not your friend and there not worth your...
    Soevil10 Soevil10 31-35, M 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    So everyone knows my MM went distant about 6

    weeks ago. Well he just stopped calling and texting outside of work. Today he was messing with me like he always does. he grabbed my hand and I thought he was going to bite me but he was like o ur hand and I went to smell it and he it my hand into my lip and it busted my lip lol...
    tc57 tc57 31-35, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    Love Should...

    Make you smile, not cry. Bring you comfort, not pain. Ease your mind, not cause restless nights. Fill your heart, not break it. Answer questions, not cause doubts. Brighten your world, not cast shadows on your days. Lift your spirits, not weigh down your soul...
    Urbancowgirl Urbancowgirl 36-40 6 Responses Nov 23, 2013

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    Why am I having an affair?

    All marriages go thru lows.. Yes.. mine hit rock bottom. He was out of work and drunk everyday... He was miserable.. He had no desire for sex.. I lost my friend.. I thought I tried to reach him.. But did I try hard enough? Then "he" comes in my life... Right when I...
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 8 Responses 1 day ago

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    More Like, 'my Affair Had Me'

    my affair did have me - for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. it chewed me up, spit me out, and i have yet to recover. we were in love, and probably still are (i definitely am) but ultimately it was my choice to end it - i didnt want to end my marriage for various reasons and knew...
    IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm 31-35, F 25 Responses Dec 26, 2011

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    An affair... The beginning: The best part.

    The getting to know each other, the can't get enough, the spark, the passion, the excitement, the fun, the romance, the constant communication, you won't fall in love The middle: Still passionate, still exciting, still fun, still communicating regularly, the romance is still...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 9 Responses Feb 22

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    So my friend tells me "I asked my boyfriend out

    of all my friends who does he find the most attractive and would want to be with". This couple knows me and my story very we'll and is friends with my ex lovers almost ex wife....my friends boyfriend says my name.. She obviously is not threatened by me and knows I wouldn't get...
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 3 Responses 4 days ago

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    How I miss those days .

    . when MM and I used to chat for hours. I so believed in him. How I miss those days when all was pure in my heart.. I had hopes... I truly loved that sunshine man.. I loved his light.. I loved his living energy. Now all lights are dim. I had a dream. He was two people... the...
    Fmina Fmina 51-55, F 7 Responses 2 days ago

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    I have been in EP for a few months,

    read many stories here, particularly in this experience and other post about had an affair. Just amazed, how easily other shallow peoples tried to judged other person when they have read the experience. Some of us, didn't have plan to be the other woman. And some of MM are also...
    ssally123 ssally123 41-45, F 16 Responses Jan 4

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    When it ended for me 9 months ago,

    I didn't want to hear about Time being the healing factor, because time was just an inanimate word and the burning pain in my chest and soul could not be soothed. Time was a vacuum.. a void. Being in 2 relationships never made sense to me. It's some kind of "temporary...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 10 Responses Jan 10

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    Update: Still going strong with my secret love.

    .. I still think about how wrong this is. Every minute, every text....every stolen kiss and every intense moment we share. If it's so wrong, why in the hell does it feel so right?? I asked my husband what would happen if I ever cheated on him... What would he think, what...
    Chelsea84 Chelsea84 26-30, F 18 Responses Feb 8

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