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I Had An Affair

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 15,069 People

    It's been over for a year.

    The toughest year in my adult life. I believe like everyone, I have an innate emotional intelligence that will direct me to my personal bliss. The affair woke me up to passion, like nothing else has ever done before. I'm more empathic, less judgmental & more open minded than...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 11 Responses May 27, 2014

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    I guess me and her might be over

    and at this precise moment I'm pretty cool with it *shrugs* I hope you're all well x
    LionCaged LionCaged 26-30, M 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    My ex husband and I were going through a rough

    patch before our marriage ended due to him hitting me. I had two affairs which my ex husband has never found out about. The first was with my hot 22 year old neighbour. The sex was amazing and the second was with a good friend of mine. I am not proud of what I did. My ex husband...
    Sapphirerose31 Sapphirerose31 31-35, F 16 Responses 5 days ago

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    I never thought it would happen to me of all

    people. The shame, the guilt of being caught and trying to repair the damage. I've been exclusive with Steve for 3 years. about 2 months back, I went to my local shopping plaza and as I walked in he was there. David his name is. I was automatically attracted like insects are to...
    LesGirl01 LesGirl01 26-30, F 3 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    An affair... The beginning: The best part.

    The getting to know each other, the can't get enough, the spark, the passion, the excitement, the fun, the romance, the constant communication, you won't fall in love The middle: Still passionate, still exciting, still fun, still communicating regularly, the romance is still...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 14 Responses Feb 22, 2014

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    I'm an affair success story.

    In a short period of time, my life took a direction that I never thought possible. I never saw it coming, did things I never thought I was ever capable of, and struggled through some turmoil...but it took my life in a direction that was best for me. This is quite long, as I'm...
    happyasever happyasever 31-35, F 7 Responses Nov 23, 2014

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    Dear Jonathan And Our Two Children.....i'm So Sorry.

    Tomorrow 01/13/13 is the1 year anniversary of my relationship with the man I'm having an affair with, the man I compromised my entire life for, the man I chose over my family when I got caught 6 months ago, and the man I currently live with today. And 1 year ago tomorrow I...
    Annie3321 Annie3321 26-30, F 84 Responses Jan 12, 2013

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    His text, "I know we belong together,

    and we most certainly will never get the chance. That kills me. But i wouldn't trade the time I had with you for anything. I love you more than I'll ever be able to describe. I will never stop loving and missing you. Goodbye sweetheart." :'( :'( I cant breath, im gonna cry. I...
    idgirl84 idgirl84 31-35, F 22 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    Feeling really good today.

    . Spent time with a the new MM man again yesterday..He's so into me, I love it! I will never ever waist my time again on a man that's not!
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 17 Responses Jan 23, 2015

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    Maybe you're reading this

    because you are having an affair or had one already or maybe you are thinking about doing it. I can't give advice because I have no clue. All I know is I am recovering and it's been a long recovery. I think the most surprising aspect was the emotion that came with this...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 17 Responses Jan 4, 2014

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    Shocking Love Affair

    I must confess something here that I thought, I would never ever talk about in my life. But I have to admit, I had an affair. Yes I did, and now I have to live with it for the rest of my life. Here's my shocking story..... About two weeks ago, I cheated on my true love...I...
    LongLiveRockAndRoll LongLiveRockAndRoll 26-30, M 28 Responses Jun 25, 2012

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    My timing is so off, do we still have a chance.

    .... Had a 1 year 8 months relationship with my SG, what we had was real and rare. We were soul mates, compatible in every way. He devoted himself to me completely, put up with the situation in any way possible. For the longest time, I kept him waiting and could not go through...
    CasualEncounter CasualEncounter 31-35, F 6 Responses a week ago

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    I have reread my first two posts

    and realized I didn't mention an important part. We BOTH decided to end this not just me. For what ever reason...I didn't mention it. I don't know why really.
    pumpgirl pumpgirl 46-50, F 4 days ago

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    Rough day of NC. Ugh.

    ... But, I did it. At least I have my wine to end the day.
    RLaney RLaney 36-40, F 3 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    Expererience1954 I think you need to leave this

    group. By your experiences listed you have no need to be in this group. If you can't find anything nice to say then don't say anything at all. Not to mention you only ream those whom you pick so stop being a bully and move on. I say that because you responded to one of my post...
    Aloha2erhz Aloha2erhz 31-35, F 6 Responses 5 days ago

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    why do people like to call the ap women home

    wrecker??!! Come on... So sad to hear people say that.. It's ignorant, judge mental and so much more...truth is... If the home wasn't off to begin with the affair wouldn't have happened. It takes two people to make an affair work. So if anyone is a home wrecker it's the dam...
    ventingagain ventingagain 36-40, F 27 Responses Nov 19, 2014

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    Xmm STILL tells me he loves me.

    On the phone. Like today. Sometimes, I'm resentful and don't answer his calls. When my resentment subsides, I pick up again. When I rationalize as to why he does this, I think of the Coldplay song "I fix you", as I know it took a whole lot of compromise for him to end us...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 6 Responses 1 day ago

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    Writing within the realm of salvageable

    marriages, I'm thinking, maybe one of the reasons why we have NC relapses is because we haven't really committed ourselves in repairing our marriages. Maybe ... we've gotten so used to enjoying the connections with our APs that we've forgotten how to connect back to our spouses...
    SundayGlory33 SundayGlory33 31-35, F 6 Responses 2 days ago

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    I am a father of 2 boys.

    I've been married over a decade. I am a professional with a career, home and financial security. I have loving parents, loving dog and good friends. I am able to enjoy my sports teams and hit the gym 5 days a week. I am also an addict. As nat king cole sang, some call it...
    MyThermopylae MyThermopylae 46-50, M 15 Responses Nov 3, 2014

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    How you make him think

    that you are a psycho and he ended it with you. The final tomahawk. It is pretty hard on your system to be constantly maintaining a level of detachment. When I feel my thoughts are taking over in thinking of MM full time, I start feeling this sick buzz in my body. Whenever I...
    Fmina Fmina 51-55, F 8 Responses 23 hrs ago

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    I am married with kids,

    he is also married with kids. Going on since last November. I'm addicted to him and our trysts. I tried to end it on numerous occasions because I know it is morally wrong. Obviously that didn't last. I love what we have and love him too. It will never happen between us...
    SexyMomma37 SexyMomma37 36-40, F 17 Responses Mar 13, 2014

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    It was just sex. That is what the plan was

    anyway. We are both married, and yes, I know it's awful of us to seek comfort in each other, but we did. The first time we met for sex I was so nervous that I accidently locked my keys in my car. He had to call AAA to come open it for me. That sucked, but we still managed to...
    klady23 klady23 26-30, F 23 Responses Feb 23, 2015

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    It's wasn't exactly an affair I'm single he has

    a girlfriend it's not gone past texting I felt like he was slow fading me out so I just stopped texting so did he has been 2 weeks now was starting to feel better then he goes and likes my photo on Instagram ...why do I always want what I can't have why do I always want the guys...
    winterusa winterusa 36-40, F 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    I'm married to a wonderful man

    and have two beautiful children but I have been having an affair with a MM for over a year. It's been a tremendous experience for me, both good and bad, and I don't know if I ever want it to end. Lots to talk about sometime but just saying hi to you all for now. I'm so glad I...
    Wikedangel Wikedangel 41-45, F 16 Responses Jan 4, 2014

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      I'm back for my advice.

    Under a different name as for some reason I can't access my old account (old name dolly2016) I have decided to do some counselling and my first session will be next week. As my break up was solely my fault I am starting to believe I will never find any one as good as him...
    Dollygirl2016 Dollygirl2016 26-30, F 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    We've been on and off

    for 3.5 years now. Mostly on. The off- when I don't think there will be an end, that he will never leave her. They're in mediation, but it's going so slow...I feel like I enable it, the marriage, the long drawn out process toward divorce, because I support him emotionally...
    Journeys2013 Journeys2013 41-45, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    Dear Haters: I would like to give you an

    insight of a person that is currently involved in having an affair and giving this insight might give you a different opinion of us...might not agree with our actions but never judge someone before you know the entire story....so here it goes... We are human...we are daughters...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 36 Responses Sep 16, 2014

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    I got married to my partner in September 2015

    after 9 years together 2 months before the wedding i started an affair which lasted right up to the week before the wedding and i seen him once after. My partner found out 10 weeks after we got married and left me. It has been 7 weeks and whilst I am slowly accepting the...
    dolly2016 dolly2016 26-30, F 13 Responses 3 days ago

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    So after some thought

    and review of my own experience and others I have discovered the following. If you are involved in an affair there is something major missing from your marriage. We seem willing ( especially us women) to be used by our AP for their own satisfaction even at the expense of our...
    Freedomnow01 Freedomnow01 31-35, F 17 Responses Mar 27, 2014

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    My Husband's Best Freind

    I t was exactly 1 yr ago. I was so depressed and ready to give up on ever being happy. My husband at the time was being very emotionally and verbally abusive. I got an e-mail from my husband's best freind. He was wondering how we were doing, and needed to talk. He had just split...
    hotandcuddly hotandcuddly 51-55, F 43 Responses Sep 1, 2011

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    The grief today though.

    ..The missing, the longing, the feeling as though I won't come out from underneath it. Do you think of me love? Does your heart remember? Do you feel the pain ? Are you happy sweet love? I can't catch my breath. The tears are real today.
    msjsta msjsta 46-50, F 22 Responses 6 days ago

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    I feel like ish, I talked to my sancho again

    and now I'm lonelier than ever. I haven't seen him but I have talked to him and I loved it. I really did. He was like don't disappear on me again blah blah, and there I go melting away saying all these dumb things. Now I'm in that limbo again of being here with my hubby and...
    XcookiexbakerXx XcookiexbakerXx 18-21, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    He's a drunk. He woke up at 8pm thinking it

    was morning. He showered and got dressed for work. I watched the entire freak show.. So sad. I need to get out of this marriage. It's toxic. He's crazy one minute then loving the next. It's insane. Having the affair was an escape... I'm a coward. I took the...
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 33 Responses Jun 4, 2015

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    I Could Help It

    It started about 4 months ago in the grocery store i caughgt a guy about 23 watching me it kind of creaped me out and excited me at the same time seeing that my husband isnt interested anymore.So i paid for my things and headed for my car. As i turned around that guy had folloed...
    imsweetenough imsweetenough 31-35, F 179 Responses Dec 30, 2011

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    Finally it is over! I never had the guts to

    block him but he is blocked in EVERYTHING! I do not want to go back to this life ever again... and I hope for all of you suffering from the on and off's of an affair, I hope you can clear all your burdens and feel free so you can love yourselves for who you are. Happy...
    Fmina Fmina 51-55, F 8 Responses 1 day ago

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    I have cheated quite a lot,

    I'm a teenager it's not so uncommon but right now I am in a happy relationship and even greater an open one lol. As long I don't cheat emotionally I'm fine.
    sSOutcastSs sSOutcastSs 18-21, M 1 Response 5 days ago

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    Dear Wife, Your husband has been cheating on

    you for 10 years with all different women, he never engaged in relationships, just sex. Until he met me. The first time it happened, I felt bad, but not really, it was only going to be that once. Of course, though, it didn't stay that way. After then we got to know each...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 10 Responses Feb 13, 2015

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    Today, urged on by an EP friend,

    I deleted the Hotmail account that I had used exclusively, off and on, to correspond with my OW between 2006 and 2013. In there were the early love notes when we were exploring the possibility of crossing the line. I also kept some sad ones from the times that we were apart at...
    Wilbury Wilbury 46-50, M 17 Responses Jan 15, 2014

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    What a storm in a teacup affairs really ARE.

    .. All contained within the walls of our hearts and minds, never to see the light of day. Haunting in their hidden beauty and their memorable "one liners". Covered with innuendos and lies just to have that one more hug, one more look, one more talk, one more kiss, then one more...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 22 Responses Oct 13, 2014

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    I'm going to spend time with him today.

    . His text "wear shear white panties please...And no bra.. I want to lick you with your panties on... It's been a long while babe since I felt this way..." He brings out My sexual desires...
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 4 Responses 3 days ago

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    Going away tomorrow with my husband.

    Looking forward to our time together. Hopefully time to do some reconnecting. I am hopeful but don't want to over pressurize the situation. Just wanted to say I am looking forward to it.
    pumpgirl pumpgirl 46-50, F 8 Responses 3 days ago

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    I really miss my ex mm.

    It's been months since we had any contact. I've had more contact with the W. I hope that some day we will be able to talk again. I miss our conversations. He was so easy to talk too.
    Mshine944 Mshine944 41-45, F 5 Responses 2 days ago

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    Wanted to thank those

    who have read my story and offered support. I think just getting it out is going to be the most helpful. For 15 years I told not a soul. I need the support to put this behind me, to help me make fresh healthy choices and to forgive myself. I understand the argument that I am...
    pumpgirl pumpgirl 46-50, F 11 Responses 5 days ago

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    All the while I thought she was the vulnerable

    one. She ripped my eyeballs out with meat hooks.
    PhinheasGage PhinheasGage 46-50, M 19 Responses 6 days ago

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    Affair With Son In Law, Now Pregnant

    I have searched all over the web for this situation and I have yet to find anything that remotely correlates.  I lost my job a few months ago and I moved in my eldest daughter and family.  I will admit right here and now that I have always had a crush on...
    littlejon63 littlejon63 46-50 351 Responses Mar 24, 2009

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