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I Had An Affair

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 14,000 People

    I have been in EP for a few months,

    read many stories here, particularly in this experience and other post about had an affair. Just amazed, how easily other shallow peoples tried to judged other person when they have read the experience. Some of us, didn't have plan to be the other woman. And some of MM are also...
    ssally123 ssally123 41-45, F 19 Responses Jan 4

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    My Husband's Best Freind

    I t was exactly 1 yr ago. I was so depressed and ready to give up on ever being happy. My husband at the time was being very emotionally and verbally abusive. I got an e-mail from my husband's best freind. He was wondering how we were doing, and needed to talk. He had just split...
    hotandcuddly hotandcuddly 51-55, F 48 Responses Sep 1, 2011

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    So after some thought

    and review of my own experience and others I have discovered the following. If you are involved in an affair there is something major missing from your marriage. We seem willing ( especially us women) to be used by our AP for their own satisfaction even at the expense of our...
    lovinglife11 lovinglife11 31-35, F 21 Responses Mar 27

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    my name is Stephanie

    and I cheat on my husband.. he's a wonderful man and has no idea that I don't deserve him.. I've tried to stop but I just cant.. I always end up in some man's bed.. I don't know why I'm this way I hate myself for it.. but if you ask me I will **** you... I can't get enough sex...
    stephanieA1972 stephanieA1972 41-45, F 9 Responses 2 days ago

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    I'm feeling a little bit sad right now.

    .. I started to listen to music again during the last couple of weeks, but I tend to avoid love songs. Today, I decided to listen to The Calling as I don't really relate the band to typical sappy love songs. I have loved the song "Where Ever You Will Go" for well over a decade...
    Koalaclover Koalaclover 36-40, F 7 Responses a week ago

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    If your MM went on holiday with his family

    for two weeks how soon would you expect him to text you?
    kimlife kimlife 26-30, F 7 Responses 1 day ago

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    Affair With Son In Law, Now Pregnant

    I have searched all over the web for this situation and I have yet to find anything that remotely correlates.  I lost my job a few months ago and I moved in my eldest daughter and family.  I will admit right here and now that I have always had a crush on...
    littlejon63 littlejon63 46-50 356 Responses Mar 24, 2009

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    The thing about affairs.

    Maybe it's just sex, something new and exciting. The touch, the want, the feeling of being wanted, appreciated; needed. Maybe he was my soul-mate, he understands me, accepts me; listens. We connect on many, almost every level. Just like every new and fresh relationship, this...
    akahi akahi 22-25, F 7 Responses a week ago

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    At times I wish I woke up with amnesia.

    To forget what was. We fell in love, wrote our own romance novel. "There is nothing cute, romantic or sexy about an affair", but in our world, it was everything and more. It is nothing to be proud of and boast to the world; how i wanted the world to know us, see us. But...
    akahi akahi 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 21

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    struggling to move on

    after the affair is the hardest thing. We work together so seeing his face, his smile etc. is all too much. He says he misses me like crazy and wants to talk. I have no idea what i should do. Its been a few weeks since it ended but a part of me has died inside
    hprice2323 hprice2323 31-35, F 6 Responses 1 day ago

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    I am still so angry at you.

    You have made me a bitter person towards you and I want to see you hurt. That is not me. I would never wish any thing like that upon any one. I have never been this angry. You striped me of everything good that I had in me, I don't have the strength to get back up,,,,not yet...
    Linley242 Linley242 51-55, F 1 Response a week ago

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    My heart.. Has it gone to far from home?

    Could it be I no longer want it home.. So off it goes... Where it's sure to not to find direction.. Right to MM because then I don't have to face any truths... Truths... I've been living a lie for so long the truth is buried deep in my soul.. Will I ever find it? I...
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 4 Responses 4 days ago

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    No I didn't have an affair,

    but I can't stand the fact that people are actually proud of having one. Having an affair these days is apparently quite common so it makes "okay." I can't believe that is what some people really think! It's not okay and having one has consequences. No matter what reason you...
    SiriusJT SiriusJT 18-21, M 5 Responses Oct 22

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    I am having a hard time letting go

    and feel tormented. For me, it is one of the worse feelings in the world when you want to talk to your lover and can't...or they are unresponsive to your requests...it hurts and there is nothing you can do about it because they don't belong to you. The memories and good times...
    Dreamgirl75 Dreamgirl75 36-40, F 24 Responses Apr 10

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    I hate Thursdays... It may sound strange

    that I hate Thursdays as Thursday, for the working person, usually means one more work day until the weekend... However, Thursdays were "our" days. They were the days when my AP was off and meant that we could spend more time together. As my workplace is flexible, they were...
    Koalaclover Koalaclover 36-40, F 1 Response 33 mins ago

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    I ******* hate you! I risked

    and sacrificed everything for you! You said you loved me; but it wasn't enough. It would never be enough. I gave you my entire heart; time and energy. I drained my marriage, because all I saw was you. I allowed you to walk into my world and you flipped it upside down and...
    akahi akahi 22-25, F 17 Responses 2 days ago

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    Update: Still going strong with my secret love.

    .. I still think about how wrong this is. Every minute, every text....every stolen kiss and every intense moment we share. If it's so wrong, why in the hell does it feel so right?? I asked my husband what would happen if I ever cheated on him... What would he think, what...
    Chelsea84 Chelsea84 26-30, F 20 Responses Feb 8

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    "How do you know for sure you loved him?

    " "Because it feels like someone died. You don't grieve lust."
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 11 Responses Mar 22

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    I Could Help It

    It started about 4 months ago in the grocery store i caughgt a guy about 23 watching me it kind of creaped me out and excited me at the same time seeing that my husband isnt interested anymore.So i paid for my things and headed for my car. As i turned around that guy had folloed...
    imsweetenough imsweetenough 31-35, F 205 Responses Dec 30, 2011

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    It's been over for a year.

    The toughest year in my adult life. I believe like everyone, I have an innate emotional intelligence that will direct me to my personal bliss. The affair woke me up to passion, like nothing else has ever done before. I'm more empathic, less judgmental & more open minded than...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 15 Responses May 27

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    Sometimes I really wonder.

    .. When MM starts feeling all guilty and Overwhelmed.. Is he? Is that what's really happening? Whenever we're getting to close.. When he feels obligated.. When he feels like it's work .. Texting through out the day.. He ends it.. 4 times... A couple of weeks go by...
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 14 Responses 5 days ago

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    It didn't feel like an affair.

    It still doesn't. It's over, but not really, and the loss has left me grief stricken. I lost my perspective and my walls and now I'm battle weary. He's too good a man to leave his wife. I never dreamed I would want him to. That's not how I play the game. Sorry if this is...
    CountrySlicker CountrySlicker 51-55, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    I am being drained, ******** down to my core.

    One side, I deserve it, I accept it. Allowing myself to whither away Self-destructive; Toxic. Every time I think of him; I hear his voice. feel his touch. Each layer of me, stripping away; realizing, accepting that it is over; The End. I've done wrong & I am doing my time, my...
    akahi akahi 22-25, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    Shocking Love Affair

    I must confess something here that I thought, I would never ever talk about in my life. But I have to admit, I had an affair. Yes I did, and now I have to live with it for the rest of my life. Here's my shocking story..... About two weeks ago, I cheated on my true love...I...
    JimMorrisonRocks JimMorrisonRocks 26-30, M 26 Responses Jun 25, 2012

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    Hello. My name is "Koalaclover"

    and I'm addicted to love... I've been 100% affair-free for one week today. No contact-no texts, phone calls, emails... It really does help to keep his last texts on my phone. These are the texts where he told me that he loves me completely and would choose me in a heartbeat...
    Koalaclover Koalaclover 36-40, F 9 Responses 3 days ago

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    We slipped.... Sexy hot texts back

    and fourth about how much were craving each other... I miss him so freakin' much..
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 11 Responses Oct 22

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    He text me last night

    and my heart jumped. I desperately wanted to respond but I didn't. He wanted to see me over the weekend but I didn't meet him. I love him so much and want to lie in his arms like I used to. But I can't. I know it's not a good situation for me. I can not take the guilt that comes...
    Australianladybug Australianladybug 31-35, F 17 Responses Mar 3

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    I am married with kids,

    he is also married with kids. Going on since last November. I'm addicted to him and our trysts. I tried to end it on numerous occasions because I know it is morally wrong. Obviously that didn't last. I love what we have and love him too. It will never happen between us...
    SexyMomma37 SexyMomma37 36-40, F 16 Responses Mar 13

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    It wasn't so much an affair

    as it was a ******* or 5. During one my husband walked up to the car and caught me. I thought I was in so much trouble. Within two days my husband was begging me to **** the other guy and let him watch.
    greenmountainmomma greenmountainmomma 31-35, F 21 Responses Jan 30

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    I hope... ...Every day

    when you wake up, you miss the good morning texts and calls we shared. ...Every night you think about how we would say " goodnight love bug." ...When you see a woman with auburn hair, you think about how you loved to wrap my curls around your fingers when we kissed. ...You...
    Urbancowgirl Urbancowgirl 36-40 11 Responses Dec 16, 2013

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    An affair... The beginning: The best part.

    The getting to know each other, the can't get enough, the spark, the passion, the excitement, the fun, the romance, the constant communication, you won't fall in love The middle: Still passionate, still exciting, still fun, still communicating regularly, the romance is still...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 9 Responses Feb 22

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    Each day I realize what a scum bag you are.

    Who do you think you are treating people the way you do? Do you think that you are the only good looking man on this earth? Good looking and thinks that you are entitled to any woman in sight? What a pig you are. A disgusting pig. I hope you feel every ounce of pain that you...
    Linley242 Linley242 51-55, F 4 Responses 2 days ago

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    Tonight I decided to start an argument with my

    AP. I was being a nag, and moody. He can't ever handle that side of me, he always says that I push him away from me acting like that. So I acted that way tonight. He has no patience. Yelled at me, told me to **** off ( nice AP right??) he then hung up on me and texted me that...
    timetochange2 timetochange2 41-45, F 8 Responses 3 days ago

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    Two Lovers, One Night.

    I'm afraid this is going to make me sound slutty. That is not really the case, i have just had weak moments in my life. I’m going to leave a lot of the mundane details out of this story to make it more interesting. This did happen several years ago but by highlighting the...
    emstioy emstioy 46-50, F 69 Responses Jan 8, 2012

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    No not really. Sorry to disappoint you

    but you ladies in your 40s might want to hear this anyway. I have been crazy with thoughts about affairs and really any idiot has been looking like Brad Pitt to me since last December. I was unhappy, depressed and even put myself in the situations that could have ended up with...
    discovery5 discovery5 41-45, F 18 Responses Apr 25

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    and he texted me, I ran into him earlier in the

    day and later he texted "it was nice to see you, sorry if you don't want to hear from me" you know? I won't let him pull me back in
    mntmama mntmama 36-40, F 1 Response 5 days ago

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    Amnesia: I drove by all the places we used to

    hang out getting wasted I thought about our last kiss, how it felt the way you tasted And even though your friends tell me you're doing fine Are you somewhere feeling lonely even though he's right beside you? When he says those words that hurt you, do you read the ones I wrote...
    timetochange2 timetochange2 41-45, F 3 Responses 3 days ago

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    I'm married to a wonderful man

    and have two beautiful children but I have been having an affair with a MM for over a year. It's been a tremendous experience for me, both good and bad, and I don't know if I ever want it to end. Lots to talk about sometime but just saying hi to you all for now. I'm so glad I...
    Wikedangel Wikedangel 36-40, F 20 Responses Jan 4

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    Christina Perri-Human But I'm only human And

    I bleed when I fall down I'm only human And I crash and I break down Your words in my head, knives in my heart You build me up and then I fall apart 'Cause I'm only human
    akahi akahi 22-25, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    Dear Jonathan And Our Two Children.....i'm So Sorry.

    Tomorrow 01/13/13 is the1 year anniversary of my relationship with the man I'm having an affair with, the man I compromised my entire life for, the man I chose over my family when I got caught 6 months ago, and the man I currently live with today. And 1 year ago tomorrow I...
    Annie3321 Annie3321 26-30, F 87 Responses Jan 12, 2013

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    I ended things with my AP tonite,

    I went to his place, we sat outside, he smoked a cigarette, we small talked, he told me he wanted to tell me about his personal life, he told me he has a girlfriend, we talked about that for a bit, he invited me in for wine and I declined, I never have before, I told him we need...
    mntmama mntmama 36-40, F 7 Responses Oct 22

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    “People say that what we’re all seeking is

    a meaning for life. I don’t think that’s what we’re really seeking. I think that what we’re seeking is an experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on the purely physical plane will have resonances with our own innermost being and reality, so that we...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 8 Responses 3 days ago

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    When it ended for me 9 months ago,

    I didn't want to hear about Time being the healing factor, because time was just an inanimate word and the burning pain in my chest and soul could not be soothed. Time was a vacuum.. a void. Being in 2 relationships never made sense to me. It's some kind of "temporary...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 10 Responses Jan 10

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    Dear Haters: I would like to give you an

    insight of a person that is currently involved in having an affair and giving this insight might give you a different opinion of us...might not agree with our actions but never judge someone before you know the entire story....so here it goes... We are human...we are daughters...
    excessbaggage excessbaggage 41-45, F 37 Responses Sep 16

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    What a storm in a teacup affairs really ARE.

    .. All contained within the walls of our hearts and minds, never to see the light of day. Haunting in their hidden beauty and their memorable "one liners". Covered with innuendos and lies just to have that one more hug, one more look, one more talk, one more kiss, then one more...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 18 Responses Oct 13

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    I've decided going forward

    if someone comments negatively on an experience I share here, I'm going to immediately delete their comment and block them. My experiences are part of my past, they're factual and they've already occurred so unkind, judgmental remarks are a waste of time and unnecessary. I don't...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 8 Responses Mar 15

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    Well, it's official. His wife took him back

    after he's been cheating with me for 7 years. Are you serious lady? The man has been coming to my bedroom for the past 7 years and you stay with him? He's a narcissist, he doesn't care about anyone but himself. He will cheat on you always. Why would you let him do that you...
    Linley242 Linley242 51-55, F 13 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    Today, urged on by an EP friend,

    I deleted the Hotmail account that I had used exclusively, off and on, to correspond with my OW between 2006 and 2013. In there were the early love notes when we were exploring the possibility of crossing the line. I also kept some sad ones from the times that we were apart at...
    Wilbury Wilbury 41-45, M 18 Responses Jan 15

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    Maybe you're reading this

    because you are having an affair or had one already or maybe you are thinking about doing it. I can't give advice because I have no clue. All I know is I am recovering and it's been a long recovery. I think the most surprising aspect was the emotion that came with this...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 20 Responses Jan 4

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    I have come full circle with my affair.

    .. This was the most beautiful yet unhealthiest relationship I have ever engaged in.... I trashed my self esteem, my morals and my heart for this relationship. I loved with every fiber in my body and every cell of my brain yet I was slowly reduced to a friend with no possibility...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 11 Responses Dec 17, 2013

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    He Doesn'T Know

    But I'm getting ready to leave him. He doesn't know. The love of my life. The most beautiful man that should be mine. All the promises I made him. I will break. He won't leave me ever. He has no reason to. I can't compartmentaliZe. Im not a box. And he's my world. The playing...
    mysecretworld mysecretworld 36-40, F 16 Responses Nov 4, 2013

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    I knew this would be tough,

    we have been texting all day everyday since February, and today is the first day without him, I keep checking my phone, looking for his texts, force of habit, I guess :(
    mntmama mntmama 36-40, F 6 Responses a week ago

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    I am thinking of him daily again!

    ! Like I have taken 2 steps back. So frustrating!! I keep thinking I might hear from him but I never do. Why do I still miss him so much?!
    lovinglife11 lovinglife11 31-35, F 7 Responses 3 days ago

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