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I Had An Affair

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 14,553 People

    why do people like to call the ap women home

    wrecker??!! Come on... So sad to hear people say that.. It's ignorant, judge mental and so much more...truth is... If the home wasn't off to begin with the affair wouldn't have happened. It takes two people to make an affair work. So if anyone is a home wrecker it's the dam...
    ventingagain ventingagain 31-35, F 29 Responses Nov 19, 2014

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    I'm married to a wonderful man

    and have two beautiful children but I have been having an affair with a MM for over a year. It's been a tremendous experience for me, both good and bad, and I don't know if I ever want it to end. Lots to talk about sometime but just saying hi to you all for now. I'm so glad I...
    Wikedangel Wikedangel 36-40, F 17 Responses Jan 4, 2014

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    I've heard that when people begin an affair,

    some people will try to be more sexual with their spouse. either out of guilt or increased sex drive. does anyone have experience with this?
    redpelican7 redpelican7 31-35, F 6 Responses 1 day ago

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    Do you ever wish you could meet done of the

    friends you have made on here.....the ones who know everything about you but never judge you? We can't have these conversations with our friends (or many of them. I think we all have at least one that we trust enough to tell) ....they might judge/spill our secrets. But out...
    sallyanne44 sallyanne44 46-50, F 17 Responses Jul 30, 2014

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    I don't know how much longer my heart can take .

    Tired of him telling me how he has to work over everyday because of the work load. Ok... I get that. Tired of him telling me how tired he is because of work. Ok.. I get that too. Tired of him not texting me at night before bed. Excuse: I'm sorry. I fell asleep. Been really...
    js1276 js1276 41-45, F 9 Responses Jun 23

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    i tied up my lover. she enjoys that.

    i know how to play her. that is what she misses with her boyfriend
    rbrtoo rbrtoo 41-45 1 Response Jun 26

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    It was a year ago today

    that you found out. I will remember that day forever, you were so mad, I have never seen you that mad. I still could see the love for me behind those sad eyes when you told me to leave. That was the hardest thing you have ever had to do. You told everybody we knew. The anxiety...
    DannysSong DannysSong 36-40, F 1 Response Jun 25

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    It's officially over!

    I saw his true side and I finally was strong enough to end it. I am hurting but relieved at the same time. This has definitely been a learning experience for me. :( I know in time I will get stronger each and everyday. Thank you to all to my EP friends for your support and...
    Cheeks2014 Cheeks2014 36-40, F 25 Responses Jan 19, 2014

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    I have come to realize

    that I can't so much as text my ex-fwb... Because when I do I become a crazy woman and succeed in getting myself blocked. For over a year I worshipped the ground he walked on and wanted to do everything to please him no matter what. It's a classic case of wanting the forbidden...
    midnightT31 midnightT31 31-35, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    Those of you who had an affair

    and experienced a D-day with your spouse... what does it feel like? I'm curious.... sorry if the question sounded weird. I just want to be more prepared if my affair came to light. (unlikely since it is over but I'll never know for sure that it won't happen)
    HurtsEverywhere HurtsEverywhere 31-35, F 5 Responses 5 days ago

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    How amazing it begins to feel

    when I can finally realize that I'm ok without him. I no longer obsess over hearing from him. I no longer have that urge to see him again. He claims he's just busy but at this point I really don't care like I did before. I was way too invested in something that I knew deep down...
    lovinglife11 lovinglife11 31-35, F 5 Responses Jun 22

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    Going on a month and a half NC.

    It all seemed to be getting easier and easier until this weekend. I've missed him terribly these last couple of days. He has written me two emails during our no contact that I haven't responded to. When I'm missing him like this I get so irritated with H for no real reason and...
    Rosybottomz Rosybottomz 31-35, F 1 Response 1 hr ago

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    Still woke up thinking of the MM.

    Even though it was Me who ended it , it still hurts just as bad. I'll always have doubts in my heart of why he did things the way he did.
    latinafairy latinafairy 26-30, F Jun 25

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    I'm an affair success story.

    In a short period of time, my life took a direction that I never thought possible. I never saw it coming, did things I never thought I was ever capable of, and struggled through some turmoil...but it took my life in a direction that was best for me. This is quite long, as I'm...
    happyasever happyasever 31-35, F 7 Responses Nov 23, 2014

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    My Husband's Best Freind

    I t was exactly 1 yr ago. I was so depressed and ready to give up on ever being happy. My husband at the time was being very emotionally and verbally abusive. I got an e-mail from my husband's best freind. He was wondering how we were doing, and needed to talk. He had just split...
    hotandcuddly hotandcuddly 51-55, F 43 Responses Sep 1, 2011

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    with a married man that ended tragically.

    I was left devastated, hurt, confused and an empty shell of a woman. All that I ever wanted in life was to be successful at any and everything I touched. I have a great career, loving family and a few close friends. I thought my life was content but needed a loving partner to...
    Hunniebae Hunniebae 26-30, F 11 Responses Apr 1

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    Does anyone has good resources

    for forgiveness? I am having a hard time forgiving....
    HurtsEverywhere HurtsEverywhere 31-35, F 4 Responses 5 days ago

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    I hope... ...Every day

    when you wake up, you miss the good morning texts and calls we shared. ...Every night you think about how we would say " goodnight love bug." ...When you see a woman with auburn hair, you think about how you loved to wrap my curls around your fingers when we kissed. ...You...
    Urbancowgirl Urbancowgirl 36-40 12 Responses Dec 16, 2013

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    you know I just woke up missing Bill.

    . then instead of glamorizing him..I started remembering all the times he didn't show up..or jumped out of my bed to scurry to Walmart because caught called and wanted something... I have to believe there are available men that are good lovers..how in the hell did we as lonely...
    Bancy918 Bancy918 51-55 3 Responses 4 days ago

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    Folks here like songs

    that speak them... Try Dirks Bentley's "I Hold On".
    Blindtoit Blindtoit 46-50, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I am a father of 2 boys.

    I've been married over a decade. I am a professional with a career, home and financial security. I have loving parents, loving dog and good friends. I am able to enjoy my sports teams and hit the gym 5 days a week. I am also an addict. As nat king cole sang, some call it...
    MyThermopylae MyThermopylae 41-45, M 16 Responses Nov 3, 2014

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    well it's the day after,

    I was wondering if the new guy would still be interested in continuing wherever it is we have or if it was a one time thing. he's not gone outside of his marriage before either. we messaged like usual today, just light conversation with flirtation. nice to see it didn't change
    redpelican7 redpelican7 31-35, F 4 Responses 6 days ago

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    I don't consider it being an affair,

    I consider it outsourcing.
    TruckersWife1984 TruckersWife1984 31-35, F 7 Responses 10 hrs ago

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    Ok . He is walking on very thin ice with me now.

    I'm giving him til the end of July to see me. We are trying to figure out a day to meet. I told him to pick a day. He said no because the last 2 times he let me down . Each day I picked he said if he didn't have to work over. Haven't seen each other in little over a month. It...
    js1276 js1276 41-45, F 6 Responses 4 days ago

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    Today, urged on by an EP friend,

    I deleted the Hotmail account that I had used exclusively, off and on, to correspond with my OW between 2006 and 2013. In there were the early love notes when we were exploring the possibility of crossing the line. I also kept some sad ones from the times that we were apart at...
    Wilbury Wilbury 46-50, M 20 Responses Jan 15, 2014

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    I just woke up and the good news is bill was

    only a fleeting thought.. it's true about the time thing..in the past I always got this anxious feeling when I felt like I was drifting apart from him..I would then be extra vigilant about sending sexy pics..keeping his interest.. his only interest.. it's not much fun to admit...
    Bancy918 Bancy918 51-55 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    Well.. I flat out asked him

    why he stopped texting me at night and for him to be honest with me. He said reason why is because he has been getting home late and by the time he does few things around house , eats, spends time with his kids, goes into to the other bedroom (him and his wife no longer share...
    js1276 js1276 41-45, F 6 Responses Jun 25

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    I had sex with a man that's not my husband

    tonight. that's a first for me. I should be feeling guilty right now, but a little happiness goes a long way. I'm not going to leave my husband and he's not going to leave his wife, we just wanted the physical attention.
    redpelican7 redpelican7 31-35, F 18 Responses a week ago

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    I survived 9... everyday.

    .like clockwork he texted me..I ended it June 9th..coping.. confused.. ashamed.. sad..let down...but relieved that now I can get past this toxic pain...he told me he loved me and was more "real" with me than with any other person... I felt that way...never would I ever get...
    Bancy918 Bancy918 51-55 5 Responses 5 days ago

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    Maybe you're reading this

    because you are having an affair or had one already or maybe you are thinking about doing it. I can't give advice because I have no clue. All I know is I am recovering and it's been a long recovery. I think the most surprising aspect was the emotion that came with this...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 20 Responses Jan 4, 2014

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    In a dilemma... Too email

    or not to email him how I feel or wait it out ....
    js1276 js1276 41-45, F 4 Responses 4 days ago

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    Shocking Love Affair

    I must confess something here that I thought, I would never ever talk about in my life. But I have to admit, I had an affair. Yes I did, and now I have to live with it for the rest of my life. Here's my shocking story..... About two weeks ago, I cheated on my true love...I...
    LongLiveRockAndRoll LongLiveRockAndRoll 26-30, M 29 Responses Jun 25, 2012

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    He's a drunk. He woke up at 8pm thinking it

    was morning. He showered and got dressed for work. I watched the entire freak show.. So sad. I need to get out of this marriage. It's toxic. He's crazy one minute then loving the next. It's insane. Having the affair was an escape... I'm a coward. I took the...
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 36 Responses Jun 4

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    Dear Wife, Your husband has been cheating on

    you for 10 years with all different women, he never engaged in relationships, just sex. Until he met me. The first time it happened, I felt bad, but not really, it was only going to be that once. Of course, though, it didn't stay that way. After then we got to know each...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 10 Responses Feb 13

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    The heat of summer seems to bring the memories

    of her out more often. It was long ago and there's no doubt in my mind she doesn't miss me like I do her. I miss the magic, the feelings, the infatuation, the closeness, smiles, laughter, the connection. She was my greatest mistake. For my punishment I assume I will forever...
    idleheart idleheart 31-35, M 9 Responses 4 days ago

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    More Like, 'my Affair Had Me'

    my affair did have me - for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. it chewed me up, spit me out, and i have yet to recover. we were in love, and probably still are (i definitely am) but ultimately it was my choice to end it - i didnt want to end my marriage for various reasons and knew...
    IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm IJustWantYouToKnowWhoIAm 31-35, F 23 Responses Dec 26, 2011

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    What a storm in a teacup affairs really ARE.

    .. All contained within the walls of our hearts and minds, never to see the light of day. Haunting in their hidden beauty and their memorable "one liners". Covered with innuendos and lies just to have that one more hug, one more look, one more talk, one more kiss, then one more...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 24 Responses Oct 13, 2014

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    It was just sex. That is what the plan was

    anyway. We are both married, and yes, I know it's awful of us to seek comfort in each other, but we did. The first time we met for sex I was so nervous that I accidently locked my keys in my car. He had to call AAA to come open it for me. That sucked, but we still managed to...
    klady23 klady23 26-30, F 29 Responses Feb 23

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    I have come full circle with my affair.

    .. This was the most beautiful yet unhealthiest relationship I have ever engaged in.... I trashed my self esteem, my morals and my heart for this relationship. I loved with every fiber in my body and every cell of my brain yet I was slowly reduced to a friend with no possibility...
    marmelade marmelade 51-55, F 9 Responses Dec 17, 2013

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    It was an okay day, I saw my ex at work,

    we took a break together and i was pretty up beat, i am trying so hard to put on a straight face, i didn't get sad today. I have to believe that i can overcome anything, i will get over him. Closure helps and acceptance that it's over and it's for the best.
    Ccutler Ccutler 36-40, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    So after some thought

    and review of my own experience and others I have discovered the following. If you are involved in an affair there is something major missing from your marriage. We seem willing ( especially us women) to be used by our AP for their own satisfaction even at the expense of our...
    lovinglife11 lovinglife11 31-35, F 16 Responses Mar 27, 2014

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    I asked myself today,

    what did I learn from all this? The lesson for me is *Stay the heck away from a married man!* Until now, I kept convincing myself that he was separated when I met him.. his wife had a kid from another guy... she was a B and a User and a cheater.. yada yada yada. Time to fess...
    Fmina Fmina 51-55, F 40 Responses Feb 10

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    Feeling really good today.

    . Spent time with a the new MM man again yesterday..He's so into me, I love it! I will never ever waist my time again on a man that's not!
    Differentforever Differentforever 46-50, F 20 Responses Jan 23

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    Just ended my affair

    and I'm sad. She was careless with her phone and her husband found out, she spilled everything. Mixed feelings. A bit relieved but also sad, I loved her. The sex...ha...no one complains that affair sex is worse than married sex. My wife doesn't know.
    joestu84 joestu84 41-45, M 4 Responses 4 days ago

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    An affair... The beginning: The best part.

    The getting to know each other, the can't get enough, the spark, the passion, the excitement, the fun, the romance, the constant communication, you won't fall in love The middle: Still passionate, still exciting, still fun, still communicating regularly, the romance is still...
    nothingbetterthanlaughing nothingbetterthanlaughing 31-35, F 15 Responses Feb 22, 2014

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    Dear Jonathan And Our Two Children.....i'm So Sorry.

    Tomorrow 01/13/13 is the1 year anniversary of my relationship with the man I'm having an affair with, the man I compromised my entire life for, the man I chose over my family when I got caught 6 months ago, and the man I currently live with today. And 1 year ago tomorrow I...
    Annie3321 Annie3321 26-30, F 85 Responses Jan 12, 2013

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