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I Hate Asking For Help

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 5,830 People

    I've always hated asking

    for help.. ever since I lived with my mom and her last husband. If I ever asked for help her husband would just laugh in my face and make fun of me for whatever I needed help with. Even though I'm out of there, I still hate asking for help to this day
    boklenHolley7 boklenHolley7 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 7

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    Expectations...

    I have such high expectations of myself and have always held myself responsible and accountable beyond all others regardless. Asking for help, as my upbringing would make you believe, is a weakness from within, a character flaw of sorts.  This was unacceptable.  It was...
    AbbyNormal AbbyNormal 31-35, F 1 Response Aug 27, 2007

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    But I'm Learning...

    I was always afraid of letting anyone close to me--much less ask or let them help me. It's still a little hard to allow someone to help, and I rarely ask, but I am slowly growing toward being able to be real and open with others...... and finding that it shows my COURAGE and...
    02KnowMe 02KnowMe 41-45, F 2 Responses Sep 17, 2011

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    Crystal39 Crystal39 36-40, F 2 Responses Oct 18, 2015

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    I Have to Do It Myself

    I am so bad at asking for help.  If something is to heavy and I have to move it I will try everything before I give up but I won't ask for help.  That is a bad thing too because I usually end up hurting myself.  I don't ask for help much also because I just want to do it...
    rondat rondat 41-45, F 12 Responses Jan 11, 2008

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    I worry that I don't reach out

    because if I did what happens when I get the solution? I'd be forced to take it otherwise people wouldnt understand if I didn't and would judge me otherwise why else would I be like this unless I wanted to be like this....it's so simple yet infinitely harder to accept help
    isshereal isshereal 31-35, F 1 Response Jan 7

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    I HATE asking for help!

    First, I now have a strong desire to be independent and do things for myself. I hate being dependent on others. It lowers my self-esteem. I desperately want to be self-reliant. Second, I feel like I'm bothering people if I ask them for help. I don't want to be a needy or...
    atpeacewithme atpeacewithme 31-35 1 Response Nov 20, 2015

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    I don't know whether it's ego,

    attitude, self respect or I do know like others to take my burden but I hesitate to ask for help.
    lonelyboy91 lonelyboy91 22-25, M 1 Response Jul 29, 2015

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    I Always Feel Like I'm Bothering Others

    I hate asking for help too. For me, I don't really think it's about pride. I think it's more about low self-esteem. I feel like if I ask someone for help, I'm bothering them. And why should I expect anyone to drop what they're doing to help ME? While I hate blaming my parents...
    lmori lmori 36-40 5 Responses Dec 26, 2010

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    I now know why I've had eating problems,

    anxiety, and extreme self-image/self-confidence problems... I just had a really big reality check and I honestly cannot stop crying. Good and bad tears. Gosh... I don't know what to say right now other than I need to vent and let it all out... God has a plan...
    lizygurl lizygurl 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 26, 2015

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    Here I sit, with my son,

    in a truck with a dead battery. Every company I call is going to charge me $100 minimum cash.. Well, I'm not near an ATM.and I only have $48. And because I live in a metro area with a hefty ghetto, the don't take cards. wtf? No one stops to help anyone anymore. And $100 for...
    rottenrobi rottenrobi 46-50, F 2 Responses Jan 6

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    In general I hate asking

    for help....not because I'm trying to be or look strong, but because the depression I experience will most prob drive people away due to stigma, not knowing what to say, or overwhelming them with negativity. Not worth the journey to get to the destination in this case. Sometime...
    TwistedCognition TwistedCognition 36-40, M 1 Response Jan 7

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    Been married for less

    than a year. My husband promised me the world and hasn't delivered. Our financial situation basically isn't a financial situation because we are always broke. I work insane amounts of overtime to try to get by. My husband promised to pay certain bills and I would pay certain...
    BeingStrong1 BeingStrong1 26-30, F 1 Response Jun 7, 2015

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    I really don't like asking

    for help cause I always feel like I'm burdening other people.
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Dec 16, 2015

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    I feel like if i ask

    for help they'll think i'm stupid or i'd be bothering them in some way.
    Darkstar101 Darkstar101 16-17, M Aug 11, 2015

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    I hate asking for help,

    it's such a stressful experience. I don't mind helping out other people, but it does take something out of you when you feel you need to depend on others. Ugh, what a disgusting feeling. Especially, when you don't really find the person reliable anyway but you still ask cause...
    Lifelover38 Lifelover38 22-25, M 3 Responses Jan 6, 2015

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    I just have learned one thing never ever ask

    people for help. If you feel bad, trust me they make you to feel more horrible.
    okspols okspols 31-35, F 1 Response Sep 2, 2015

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    I don't know why I'm

    so scared to ask for help. By doing so, I have nothing to lose anyway, except for my face. I feel like I've been all over it already. And I'm getting the feeling that I am only embarrassing myself. But, why is that? I'm not asking for money, I'm not stealing anything from them...
    datj datj 36-40, F Oct 23, 2015

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    It is not the best way I know,

    and probably wrong, but when I stuck generally I struggle and try to figure out things myself. The best part you learn things, internalizes them. But the worst part, you don't know when you **** up and and when to start looking for a help, this way you can stuck on something...
    JetWoes JetWoes 36-40, M 6 days ago

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    I hate it when people assume

    that I'm helpless and lonely. And I hate it more when someone pities me! I don't need your help and I don't pity myself. Why do you!
    ss504688 ss504688 22-25 2 Responses Jan 7

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    I Hate Asking For Help ... To Me It Is A Sign Of Weakness

    In my younger days I was a very strong woman, physically, emotionally and financially. I grieve for those days when I was independent, carefree and confident.Two things have changed my life drastically; I had an accident nine years ago, and for the last two and a half years I...
    SolitaireDiamond SolitaireDiamond 51-55, F 10 Responses Jun 17, 2013

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    I am constantly tired

    and it's all I can think about. My mentality, friends bitching, depressed thoughts and exhaustion ALL I CAN COME UP WITH IN MY MESSED UP MIND I can't speak like a normal person I can't do anything right IM A FREAKING FAILURE See? Even now I can't think of anything to type or say...
    shadowgem shadowgem 13-15, F 4 Responses Nov 25, 2014

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    In some cases, if I can't figure it out,

    it won't get done until I can.
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jul 23, 2015

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    Failure!

    I've failed/dropped 9 classes because I was scared to ask for help! I've pulled muscles, been physically hurt, been afraid to cry or talk to people I love because I don't want to bother anyone.
    jokinpa jokinpa 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 10, 2007

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    When I ask for help, I always feel like it's

    admitting that I'm stupid, yes I score high on the standardized tests and have a high IQ but I still hate it when I don't get things and have to ask for help
    EmoGirl286 EmoGirl286 13-15, F 2 Responses Mar 19, 2014

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    I don't like to ask for help ether being on Ep

    ( sorry Ep ) but I enjoy helping people. Funny thing is when you actually ask for help some people take it granted some Thinks they're better then you because there helpless ...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Jan 6

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    Don't get me wrong. If I need help,

    I'll definitely ask for it. I simply hate having to ask for it when I know that I won't get it, even though I know that there are plenty of people who could help me.
    BLACKTIGER75 BLACKTIGER75 36-40, M Dec 9, 2015

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    When it's something serious I won't go to

    anyone close to me because I don't want them to worry too much. Especially if it's something they can't really help me with so that would make it worse. I had to tell someone because I wanted to get it off my chest so badly because I guess I felt so helpless during the situation...
    anonamanda001 anonamanda001 18-21, F 8 Responses Jan 6

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    But I have to ask the help of a woman to look a

    my penis to see if it's normal before I lose my virginity
    sprite944 sprite944 18-21, M 1 Response Dec 20, 2015

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    It makes me feel weak

    or that I might somehow end up in someone's debt or some bs like that.
    Nojji Nojji 13-15, F 5 Responses May 8, 2014

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    I don't like asking for help.

    I like being able to say "I did this! I was able to overcome this and get it done myself!" Although I know how to ask for help wen it's truly needed.
    BeefStromi BeefStromi 18-21, M 1 Response Mar 16, 2014

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    I hate asking for help,

    especially if it is something I really need/want. I can't stand being indebted to someone.
    Evabeth Evabeth 26-30, F 1 Response Aug 13, 2015

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    I like to do things on my own,

    i really do hate asking for help. ppl have no idea how hard it is for me to ask, so if I humble myself to ask you for help, consider yourself the few n far between
    deleted deleted 26-30 Aug 14, 2015

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    I'm the one who everyone opens up to

    but can't open up to anyone. Neat isn't it? Nah seriously. I wish I could ask for help or at least talk about my problems.
    deleted deleted 26-30 5 Responses Apr 30, 2015

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    I know I can figure it out.

    No matter what it is I can get it done. Asking for help makes me feel useless, like I can't do anything.
    MrPoolofsouls MrPoolofsouls 16-17, M 2 Responses Jan 7

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    I've never wanted to give anyone the

    satisfaction of saying "You wouldn't be in the position you are now if it wasn't for me" or "You wouldn't have what you have now if it wasn't for me." I've always taken great comfort in that most every individual goal I've achieved I've managed to do it on my own. I think...
    RememberTomorrow RememberTomorrow 31-35, M 2 Responses Jan 8

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    I am such a coward. And

    why is it that I will go incoherent whenever I try to start writing the letter that really matters the most. I mean, the future of my family is at stake here. So even though its wrong to ask for help I have to at least try.
    datj datj 36-40, F Oct 23, 2015

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    I absolutely hate asking

    for help. For whatever the situation is I feel like people will think I'm dumb or weak or not independent of I ask for help. It's been a lifelong struggle.
    Girlinthefloweredskirt Girlinthefloweredskirt 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 20, 2014

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    There are favors so large

    that it becomes impossible to repay. After the initial gratitude, takes over the embarrassment and discomfort to road meeting their own benefactor. The most common way to get rid of his own inadequacy is to hate those who did the favor, denying in his own subconscious and...
    Arkimede Arkimede 46-50, M Nov 21, 2015

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    Where I live if you asks

    for help. It's always someone else who looks into your face and try to get you to follow them. It's so scary and they need to stop. I don't asks for help. When I travel places, I used to asks for help but the dudes just stare at me and try to do stuff because I don't know where...
    lorrena19 lorrena19 18-21, F 3 Responses Oct 11, 2015

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    I'm not sure if it's true

    because my counselor said so but I listen. when it comes to cooking or drawing...I will never lister....yeah... I'm such a self center. :(. I am my own master when it comes to my interest..I listen other than that.
    ZardaF5 ZardaF5 26-30, M 1 Response Jan 7

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    I've been having panic attacks a lot

    and I'm too nervous and scared to tell anyone. I have no friends to turn to, so it seems I only have myself.
    GhettoMemeing GhettoMemeing 13-15, F 3 Responses Sep 16, 2015

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    I'm Always the Helper, So I Can't Be the "Helpee"

    Although I've recently figured out its actually okay to ask for help, its still hard for me. People think I give great advice, so they always come to me with their problems. I will sit with a person for hours on end listening to their story and offering feedback, and I like it...
    sublimex sublimex 16-17, F 6 Responses Dec 25, 2007

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    Even when I need help I'm just to stubborn.

    Asking for help could really make things better.
    Jadathomps2 Jadathomps2 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 7

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    Ive had quite the wretched year.

    My husband was Navy and passed away august 6th of 2014 and since then life has been a nightmare. I suffer from severe depression, anxiety, and ptsd. Because of this my son, born two months before my husband's untimely death at 21, was given to my mother in law. I completed a...
    watchyourgrammar watchyourgrammar 22-25, F 1 Response Jan 11

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