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I Hate Being a Stepmom

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 844 People

    Why I Will Never Date A Guy With Kids Again

    Ladies please, please, don't just walk ...run!! I’ve just come out of another ‘Man with baggage’ relationship –Never again will I put myself through this. I am talking from experience. I am 30+, attractive, professional woman on a positive path and working hard to get a...
    angellight7 angellight7 31-35, F 11 Responses May 20, 2013

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    Attention Stepmom's: Put yourself first.

    I recently left my husband this week after 10 years of marriage. I was unhappy with the conditions of our home and how he never held his kids accountable for doing their chores and cleaning up after themselves, not considering my feelings, using me financially to support his...
    Februarychic Februarychic 31-35, F 7 Responses Oct 15, 2014

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    I think my marriage is over.

    I have been married to my husband for three years, but we have been together almost 11 years. His son is 10 years old, and honestly I have never tried to have a relationship with him like I should have. I have been in his life since he was born, but I was only 20 and didn't...
    tjones44 tjones44 31-35, F 7 Responses Jul 31, 2014

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    it really annoys me that a mother can have kids,

    and then dont wanna take care of them!!!! like you had kids like every other women TAKE CARE OF YOUR RESPONSIBILITIES!!!!! sorry just venting #parttimemoms
    mariebkn3 mariebkn3 22-25, F 3 Responses Apr 26

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    I think my time has come to say goodbye to my

    "family". been so sad about the mess it will make then I realized its really never been my mess to fix. it was his nd he dumped it all in my lap.
    back2livin back2livin 51-55, F 3 Responses Apr 13

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    My story isn't quite like everyone else.

    . we live about 300 miles away so we only get the "princess" during the summer but that is a few months of my house being taken over and myself feeling as if i don't exist.. we have been together since my future SD was 5.. she is now 10 and is completely out of control at her...
    EvilStepMom33 EvilStepMom33 26-30, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    4 SK here this weekend.

    Hubby & I scraped & started painting house. SD 20 painted doors, but NO HELP from SS 16 "Jethro". Couldn't/ wouldn't even mow yard! His contribution was to irritate his siblings & dad. But what really ****** me off is after all of our hard work this weekend-outside working in...
    rrthompson rrthompson 46-50, F Jun 14

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    Raising a child that isn't your own.

    Such fun! When things get tough, there are no sweet memories of them being cute because you weren't around for that part. No biological love to fall back on. I'm so sick of it all. 7 years and I'm thinking of throwing in the towel. She'll be 14 in June so pretty sure it's not...
    Countrychicky Countrychicky 26-30 3 Responses Apr 10, 2014

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    I have one SD that is 11.

    I have an 11 from a previous relationship and me and my husband has a 4 year old together. My SD Is a manipulator and my husband turns a blind eye to it. She has physically assaulted my 11 year old when we first got together until my daughter fought her back and won. Know she...
    kthomas12 kthomas12 31-35, F 2 Responses Jun 15

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    What Did I Get Myself Into

    I got married 6 months ago to an incredible man, really he is the best. Only there's one problem, the only cause of stress in our relationship, the only reason we ever argue-his 2 kids from a previous marriage. I hate being home when they are here. I try to be normal and pretend...
    Marie2424 Marie2424 26-30, F 8 Responses Nov 20, 2013

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    I married a wonderful man.

    .. with baggage. He has four daughters and a step daughter that he has cared for since she was very young. His ex is as crazy as they get. She has ordered a restraining order on my husband and me numerous times. Since I am a schoolteacher and he is a police officer, it looks...
    Steppedontoomanytimes Steppedontoomanytimes 41-45, F 6 Responses May 24, 2014

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    well I don't know how to feel.

    yesterday my husband took his daughter to the movies because she can't come back here until she goes to counseling. I think it's a great idea but I asked how it was and he acting like he didn't want to tell me. I know next time I won't even ask.
    kthomas12 kthomas12 31-35, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I Want My Old Life Back

    I have so much anger built up inside of me that I don't know when I will explode or who will be there when it happens, but I need to express my anger issues at my life situation right now. Where do I start....I met my boyfriend 3 years ago when I was young and single and loving...
    Katie1979 Katie1979 26-30 78 Responses Apr 28, 2009

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    I am a newly wed, and my husband has three kids

    (11yrs, 2 yrs, 11 months) with two other women. I have a 2 yr old from a previous relationship (whose "real" dad has never been involved) and am currently 31 weeks pregnant with mine and my husbands first child together. Before I got pregnant, things between me and my husbands...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses 2 days ago

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    UGH! I am about going to lose my mind!

    !! Lazy, *#%+€<. SS16! Home all damn day... Dishwasher not unloaded, kitchen a mess, bread bag open, peanut butter out, and of course dirty dishes in sink! Did I mention his wet & now skanky laundry still in washer from yesterday?? I'm so pissed off! Fat, lazy, SOB!!!
    rrthompson rrthompson 46-50, F 3 Responses Jun 16

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    Am I really that bad of a person

    for not wanting to do things with my SD's. I've had so much hurt and pain caused by them and they are such Debbie Downers everything is always wrong or bad. I know this happens as kids get older but I don't want to take a vacation with them. I am affected by them, I've...
    frecks6 frecks6 31-35, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    It's getting to the point

    that I'd rather raise foster kids than step kids. Probably the same problems but at least I would feel like I was helping someone have a better life.
    Februarychic Februarychic 31-35, F 2 Responses Apr 9, 2014

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    Women That Aren't Stepmoms Could Never Understand...

    I know that I should've known what I was getting into. At first it was ok. I honestly thought I could handle it & make a better life for my stepchildren. I couldn't understand how these stepmoms could feel the way they did. I was judgemental, I admit. I had no clue as to what it...
    455cargirl 455cargirl 36-40, F 18 Responses Jan 22, 2012

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    Don't Get Involved With A Man With Kids

    I got involved with a man about 5 years ago that has two children ages 10 and 14.  I was warned by everybody how hard it was. I told myself as long as I have my own life I would be able to handle it. The truth is, there is no room for you when it comes to dating a man with...
    dfilbert dfilbert 36-40, F 95 Responses Oct 25, 2009

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    This is going to be very long winded

    and I'm posting this because I need to vent and need to know who else is going through something similar and how they're handling it. Here goes... My husband and I have been married a year. He has a 7 yo son. Soon to be 8. I never thought I'd get involved with someone who has a...
    Kristy37 Kristy37 36-40, F 6 Responses 3 days ago

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    see I am mad. so my step daughter has this

    habit of calling her mom after a few days of her being with us to tell her what we do or whatever. we just got a house phone so I don't even know the number. while we at work she calls her mom and when I told my husband he just said how his feeligs are hurt BC she may not call...
    kthomas12 kthomas12 31-35, F 1 Response Jun 19

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    I am facing a big issue.

    I have a stepdaughter who is seven and my son is six months old. I went to part time after he was born so that I can spend some days home with him. But lately with the daycare cost and him having fevers from constant ear infections all the time and me having to take off so much...
    amlesa amlesa 26-30, F 2 Responses Jun 17

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    I used to think I could make it work

    but not anymore. I could never imagine living with people who basically hate me but this is reality. I did nothing to truly cause it. Why are people so hateful?
    NotSoPerfect777 NotSoPerfect777 41-45, F 7 Responses May 16

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    You've got to be kidding me we buy snack foods

    for the SD's they know it's for them and then they say I'm not hungry. And the food wasn't cheap, we are on vacation, I'm so angry. I am so sick of bad attitudes I'm never taking them on a trip again. Ungrateful brats.
    frecks6 frecks6 31-35, F 3 days ago

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    ugh woke up irritated

    as always. I get up so I can go get my husband something for fathers day. my daughter heard me and got up and here comes my step daughter. now they both usually sleep till 2pm, lol. but for the last few years my daughter has been distant BC she was going through puberty so know...
    kthomas12 kthomas12 31-35, F Jun 20

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    SS16 is so mouthy! He had been in our bathroom

    using my body lotion. He has done this before & was told by me & his dad to stay out of my personal things! I gave bottle of lotion to him & told him to keep it & again to stay out of my things! He looked at me & said: What are you gonna do about it? & Why don't you just stop...
    rrthompson rrthompson 46-50, F 1 Response a week ago

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    Maybe I shouldn't post in this experience.

    I don't hate being a stepmom. Not anymore anyway. I don't hate being a stepmom because I am OVER being a stepmom. The "children" are now 38 and 35 and no more considerate or respectful of me than when I married their father 32 years ago. These "children" don't mind stepping...
    sueselala sueselala 51-55, F 4 Responses Jan 13

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    Note to self tonight.

    ... No talking to him he doesn't listen. I be nice it don't matter. Mean it don't matter. Try and talk to he mocks me. Get over it. it's not a quality you want in your boys. Try to teach and it's a downfall. He's a parent that won't learn. I suppose it's a matter of if how you...
    MommyToMine MommyToMine 31-35, F Jun 21

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    I never asked to be a stepmom

    or have this girl in my family, it might sound harsh but i don't see her as part of the family and i hate having her in MY home
    StepmomLife StepmomLife 26-30, F 2 Responses Jun 18

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    Is it just me or are loads of (young) people

    just signing up to attack what you wrote just for the fun of it?? Some haven't even read through the whole story and based their opinion on the first 3 sentences. People really don't have to agree with what I write but just leaving a comment calling me names or a bad person...
    makingimpossiblepossible makingimpossiblepossible 41-45, F 4 Responses Mar 21, 2014

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    and just like that, she was gone.

    filled a small bag, teddy bear, ipad. left behind everything else dad ever got her, no hug, an awkward goodbye, to live w mom for the summer. don't let the door....
    amydextrous1 amydextrous1 41-45, F 2 Responses Jun 13

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    I can deal with SS14,

    I like him, but this time since he's been here this summer he's very awkward... I get it he's 14 but he acts like he can't talk, he mumbles never answers questions or anything just kind of stares at you...! It's extremely annoying. I don't care really because with past SD...
    MommyToMine MommyToMine 31-35, F 3 Responses Jun 21

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    Today I'm having a bit of a low day.

    Am feeling that my husband is slipping a bit as in not making his kids stick to our rules. They drop the ball and he just makes a remark about it but doesn't follow through in making them actually do it. That's like a slippery road downwards and means life at home gets more...
    makingimpossiblepossible makingimpossiblepossible 41-45, F 10 Responses Feb 23, 2014

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    Reading all of these stories has alleviated a

    lot of the guilt I've been feeling lately. So, here goes. I've been in a relationship for one year and seven months. I knew going in that he had a mess of kids with his ex wife, but they were all in her custody and never visited. He seemed perfectly fine with it. Well, last...
    InquisitiveGem85 InquisitiveGem85 26-30, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    My husband had 50% physical custody of his son

    who is 3.5 years old. I love this little boy and I truly want the best for him. It's hard to be around him though because he cries and whines constantly. There is hardly ever a quiet, relaxing moment in my house. It's constant crying and whining, over every single thing. It...
    Niceandcold Niceandcold 26-30, F 3 Responses Jun 15

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    my SD is here for a few days.

    I am praying that is goes smooth. my daughter will ask about her six flags ticket today. I just hope no drama
    kthomas12 kthomas12 31-35, F 1 Response Jun 18

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    So my husband just recently found out he has a

    daughter that is three going on four from a one night stand! We have a daughter together also she just turned two :) but this whole thing has me going crazy! I feel guilty for feeling this way. It was just me him and our daughter and all of a sudden...boom we have another...
    msours4 msours4 26-30, F 12 Responses Jun 25

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    I posted something in the group "I hate my

    roomate". because that's exactly what it feels like, living with bad roomates, virtual strangers who have no respect for you or your things. I keep getting flashbacks to some of the roomates I had in college, whenever I get annoyed. the ones who throw you laundry on the floor...
    amydextrous1 amydextrous1 41-45, F 1 Response May 16

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    Searching these posts

    for help winning back my wife. I have failed my my wife. It took an entire year for me to be able to admit that or even see it. For the last year it's been "my wife is selfish" or "my wife is unreasonable." But it was me. I'm selfish. I failed her and I pray I can get her back...
    TonyM323 TonyM323 36-40, M 8 Responses Sep 23, 2014

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    I was so naive..... I am not allowed to be

    married to my husband, but rather I have to compete with my SD and his dead wife's memory. I thought I was a nice person, good mom, fair. I had a cruddy step mom, I just knew if I wasn't her, life would be awesome. Boy was I wrong. If I say anything then I'm the evil step...
    frecks6 frecks6 31-35, F 5 Responses 4 days ago

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    First, I would like to say

    that I wish I had found this group prior to even getting involved with a man with kids!!! I would have ran so fast the other way. I'm 36...I have a professional career in the medical field and I also have an MBA. I came into my current marriage with one child, he is 6 and is...
    Dddsss123 Dddsss123 36-40 3 Responses Jun 22

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    I am going to genuinely try to not let my SK

    ruin my weekend. All 4 of them here today. I'm usually the first one up & I am enjoying the quiet (with coffee & a cigarette or 2). Spent over $300 @ grocery store yesterday & as I came into kitchen this morning, I see butter tub left out all night & loaf of bread left open as...
    rrthompson rrthompson 46-50, F 3 Responses May 30

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    So husband asked SS 14

    where he wanted to live and he chose to stay here. I know it's probably best for him considering that he has to repeat the 8th grade. The reason I don't want him living here is because he is extremely lazy and stinky. He won't shower unless told to do so and then sometimes still...
    Februarychic Februarychic 31-35, F 2 Responses Jun 17

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    DEAR MAN. YOU MADE CHILDREN,

    YOU WANT CUSTODY. THIS IS YOUR CHILD. ASK YOURSELF I'D YOU WOULD SEEK CUSTODY IF YOU DID NOT HAVE A NEW WIFE. BE HONEST.
    amydextrous1 amydextrous1 41-45, F 2 Responses Jun 16

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    Sometimes I feel bad my husband is

    such a good DAD to my two boys there's no 'step' in his mind. We do have them 100% of the time though but I am not a good step mom! I make sure kids have all they need but as for any emotional relationship I just don't have it in me, even with SS who I like. I think it's just a...
    MommyToMine MommyToMine 31-35, F 6 Responses Jun 11

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    Is it 8am Monday yet?

    ! Seriously cannot stand this child.
    MommyToMine MommyToMine 31-35, F 4 Responses Feb 14

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