Post
Experience Project iOS Android Apps | Download EP for your Mobile Device

I Hate Being a Stepmom

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,010 People

    Hey everyone..I wrote last week about hating

    being a step mom. I read through a lot of forums and could relate with other women out there. There's no hard & fast rules as everyone's experience, albeit similar at times, is unique. Through it all, I came to realise that my hating being a step mom was down to the fact...
    lorir1975 lorir1975 36-40, F 4 Responses Feb 11, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Hate to use the C word

    but seriously my step daughter is pretty close.
    snel333 snel333 22-25, F 6 Responses Dec 27, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    So I wanted to give an example of a normal day

    in my life! Things like this happen everyday and in the end I'm in the wrong!! I end up confused like how was this my fault. So it's my birthday and my husband and I are not on speaking terms(because we're always fighting about his son being a **** starter) I asked him to not...
    jennymike28 jennymike28 36-40, F 3 Responses Jan 27

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Searching these posts

    for help winning back my wife. I have failed my my wife. It took an entire year for me to be able to admit that or even see it. For the last year it's been "my wife is selfish" or "my wife is unreasonable." But it was me. I'm selfish. I failed her and I pray I can get her back...
    TonyM323 TonyM323 41-45, M 8 Responses Sep 23, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I feel utterly defeated.

    I love being a stepmom but am constantly walking on the eggs shells of the ex-wife. But last night was the straw that broke the camels back... The manic ex-wife called and said that their kids could no longer call me stepmom. From now on, I'm simply their fathers wife - now...
    robinfontaine06 robinfontaine06 26-30, F 5 Responses Jan 25

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I love my stepson. I love him more

    than I I could say. But sometimes I also despise him. He's only 3. He's still learning. And I know he loves me, too. But I feel like I have no patience. This is not really what I signed up for. He is so defiant and throws tantrums about literally everything in the world. People...
    constantlydrowning constantlydrowning 26-30, F 3 Responses Jan 10

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I came across a quote today

    that made me think of my fellow group mates. We try our hardest to make our spouses happy especially when it comes to dealing with their children. We are often criticized, scrutinized, accused, and made to be the scapegoat all while trying to make them happy. However this...
    deleted deleted 26-30 6 Responses Sep 29, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Attention Stepmom's: Put yourself first.

    I recently left my husband this week after 10 years of marriage. I was unhappy with the conditions of our home and how he never held his kids accountable for doing their chores and cleaning up after themselves, not considering my feelings, using me financially to support his...
    Februarychic Februarychic 31-35, F 7 Responses Oct 15, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    To all the step mom having a hard time today,

    just wanted to say Merry Christmas and hope that these children don't ruin your whole day! Have a 14 year old crying bc she didn't get everything she wanted. Over 3k later not including a 10k vacation. Here's to as many small airplane bottles of whiskey I will drinking. Hope...
    snel333 snel333 22-25, F 1 Response Dec 25, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I hate being a step mom.

    I made two different cakes for the family birthday on Sunday, took her to dinner and dessert last night for her birthday and today on her actual birthday I didn't buy her a cake so I'm the bad guy. We celebrated with everyone earlier. We did nothing today because people...
    frecks6 frecks6 36-40, F 1 Response Jan 27

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Hi, I'm new to this site to vent a bit.

    Hoping someone can help me explain to my husband that I did not get married to take care of his kids and do all the things he does not want to do. I feel like the only reason he got married was to have a full time nanny. We have been married over 5 years and I've hated it...
    kdundy kdundy 46-50, F 5 Responses Jan 13

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Hi everyone...will lay out my situation any any

    input is greatly appreciated. I am at my wits end. I was divorced for 14 years and took my time before moving on. At the time I had 2 girls 16&18 and after years of dating I met the guy I thought I would spend the rest of my life with. When dating I asked all the important...
    Stepmom519 Stepmom519 46-50, F 4 Responses Dec 17, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Sometimes I feel like I can't do this step

    parent thing. I've been married a little over a year-together almost 3. I knew Going into the marriage about all the drama. My husband has 3 bio kids from his ex wife. My husband and I have a huge thing in common we both had bad first marriages and did the back and fourth thing...
    juneladybug74 juneladybug74 41-45, F 2 Responses Jan 20

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I think I just need to get a few things off my

    chest.. I've posted something on here before in more elaborate detail about my boyfriend and his son.. Basically. we've been together 1 year and about 4 months in our relationship my bf tells me that he doubts that his son is his since he had speculations about his ex cheating...
    krazykristen krazykristen 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 25

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Today I am extremely thankful!

    !! A year ago this time, I was extremely unhappy because my husband's child was living in my home and was my full responsibility. It was tough, especially since I had just become a first time mom to my little boy. A year later, the lies has stopped, the going up to the school...
    deleted deleted 26-30 9 Responses Nov 5, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Is it just me or are loads of (young) people

    just signing up to attack what you wrote just for the fun of it?? Some haven't even read through the whole story and based their opinion on the first 3 sentences. People really don't have to agree with what I write but just leaving a comment calling me names or a bad person...
    makingimpossiblepossible makingimpossiblepossible 41-45, F 4 Responses Mar 21, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Because I'm Canadian,

    this coming Monday is a fairly new Statutory holiday... "Family Day." What was going through the minds of our trusted MPs when they decided to give us a day off in the middle of cold, snowy, February to spend cooped up with our "families" mustn't have their step-children on this...
    Gracey0079 Gracey0079 36-40, F 3 Responses Feb 12, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Venting again on this subject cause I just

    can't seem to escape it. We talked last night about how much I hate the fact that he has a child, & that like every other conversation about it went no where. He keeps trying to say that I'm his wife, & his daughters mother was a ugly mistake, but that's not quite what bothers...
    Jaymarie1008 Jaymarie1008 22-25, F 5 Responses Jan 27

    Your Response

    Cancel

    It's sad thinking about

    that my SD and I used to be so close before everything was ruined by her mom. She's turning 15 in a couple weeks and I just look at her and can't even deal. We used to be soooo close but now I can barely stand her. It's not just an age thing either, even though I feel like that...
    snel333 snel333 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 17

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I am so frustrated right now.

    We have my SD 50 percent of the time and my husband doesn't understand how to treat her like a kid . She just turned eight years old and he's always letting her stay up all night and hang out with the adults all the time. Im so mad right now bc last weekend we took her to a...
    amlesa amlesa 26-30, F 3 Responses Jan 23

    Your Response

    Cancel

    It's hard enough being a part time stepmom,

    but it's absolutely frustrating and at times unbearable being a full time stepmom to two teens. And when husband doesn't follow through with his kids and the rules. I'm sick of being the full time "Mom" to kids that aren't mine. Sometimes I feel bad that I don't want all the...
    Februarychic Februarychic 31-35, F 3 Responses Aug 1, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    It's been about a week seen I've decided this

    is not the life I planned for myself or my children. I decided to write down my long toxic relationship from beginning to the all most end to help me. I feel even more broken everyday, and it's all because of my husband and SS but mainly my husband because he has allowed his...
    jennymike28 jennymike28 36-40, F 1 Response Jan 29

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Is it 8am Monday yet?

    ! Seriously cannot stand this child.
    MommyToMine MommyToMine 31-35, F 4 Responses Feb 14, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I think I hate him more

    than his retard kids. Really. I think it would be a release of we let go at this point. No one (or their kids) should feel like dead weight.
    MommyToMine MommyToMine 31-35, F 3 Responses Dec 25, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    My SS told my sister in law he wanted to live

    here 😂😂😂 I would rather smash my face into concrete.Summers and Christmas are enough. Thank you though... So over this ****.
    MommyToMine MommyToMine 31-35, F 2 Responses Jan 22

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I am struggling. Big time!

    I have an 11 week old baby and 2 step daughters. We share them 50/50 with his mother but she doesn't like having them on weekends as it interferes with her golf. My partner works really hard, generally 6 days a week. None of this is my issue, my feelings of resentment towards my...
    annika89 annika89 26-30, F 2 Responses Dec 21, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    UPDATE: I'm trying so hard right

    now to stay in my room and not have to go to war!!! I'm just sick to my stomach! OK I tried to talk to my husband while the kids were gone, but ugh he's such an a**h***!! I'm trying to talk to him without being scared, without letting him confuse me and without allowing him to...
    jennymike28 jennymike28 36-40, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    So I'm constantly battling to love my five year

    old stepdaughter in my opinion I don't really like watching her... she doesn't listen to me my in laws think she is a good girl and I'm getting to the point where I have no say so in the matter
    dns2016 dns2016 18-21, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I hate the holidays. Can't wait

    til it's over. It's more pressure... No real enjoyment... As a SM it feels like another chore.
    MommyToMine MommyToMine 31-35, F 2 Responses Dec 14, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    DEAR MAN. YOU MADE CHILDREN,

    YOU WANT CUSTODY. THIS IS YOUR CHILD. ASK YOURSELF I'D YOU WOULD SEEK CUSTODY IF YOU DID NOT HAVE A NEW WIFE. BE HONEST.
    amydextrous1 amydextrous1 46-50, F 1 Response Jun 16, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    "You cannot pour from an empty cup,

    take care of yourself first". Anything that you are doing for another person that is detrimental to your physical and emotional health should not be done. If you've ever taken a flight, you've heard the instructions to secure your own oxygen mask before attempting to help...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Oct 4, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    After 10 years of providing love,

    support, money, care, kindness, humor, clothes, food, and a good home for my step kids, I finally gave up on them. They just keep kicking me in the head, and as much as I tried to help them become contributing members of society, they turned out like their bio mother - conniving...
    WickedVagabond WickedVagabond 36-40 3 Responses Dec 13, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Today's quote of the day,

    "If you come for them, you are coming for me and I am not going down without a fight". I have bonded with some of the ladies of this group. I felt like a misfit, a can't get right until a moment of despair led me to google the words "I hate my step daughter". Then I found...
    deleted deleted 26-30 5 Responses Oct 7, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Today I am angry! Very angry.

    Almost too angry to talk...if you could believe that. I am furious at my husband because besides the birth of my son, being married to him has cost me too much. I angry at his daughter because she is the catalyst for every single dramaful unhappy aspect of my life right now...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses May 20, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I keep thinking that with time,

    my stepdaughter will grow on me, but I still can't stand her. I hate being around her. I hate the fact that she exist. It's so mean, but I have to vent. I mean when I got with him, I knew he had a child, but he's such a great guy that I figured I could try to make it work. But...
    Jaymarie1008 Jaymarie1008 22-25, F 5 Responses Jan 19

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Oh my god I love you guys!

    !!! after reading a few posts I feel normal!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    frustratedfantasy frustratedfantasy 26-30, F 2 Responses Dec 5, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    When your husband is just

    as excited when you tell him there are only 3 Christmases left with his daughter/your step daughter!!! True love, the count down continues. May the next three Christmases be kind to me. I've been in this **** for ten years. Finally seeing the light at the end of the terrible...
    snel333 snel333 22-25, F 1 Response Dec 20, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I'm not officially a step-mom yet

    and before anyone tells me that I shouldn't marry this man...I am going to someday. But...I cannot stand his children. His son, in particular. He is 9 years old and is a menace to society in my opinion. I have 3 kids of my own, he has two. I had my tubes tied so we can...
    mmbvt mmbvt 36-40, F 6 Responses 4 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Don't Get Involved With A Man With Kids

    I got involved with a man about 5 years ago that has two children ages 10 and 14.  I was warned by everybody how hard it was. I told myself as long as I have my own life I would be able to handle it. The truth is, there is no room for you when it comes to dating a man with...
    dfilbert dfilbert 36-40, F 107 Responses Oct 25, 2009

    Your Response

    Cancel

    It's getting to the point

    that I'd rather raise foster kids than step kids. Probably the same problems but at least I would feel like I was helping someone have a better life.
    Februarychic Februarychic 31-35, F 3 Responses Apr 9, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Don't get me wrong, being s step mom has

    definitely has its ups but yes downs as well. Her mother has been out of the picture for over 4 years and is now back. So in those years I've had taken on the full time mom roll and we had such a great time. Now that's she's back its like I'm the worst person in the world she's...
    Jaycekylee Jaycekylee 22-25, F Jan 12

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I am no longer a stepmom.

    However, I remain in this group to provide support, listen and to help ease any remaining guilt I feel over the struggle I went through. These stories are all too common and when you are in this situation you are isolated and made to feel guilty about everything. The blame...
    455cargirl 455cargirl 36-40, F 7 Responses Oct 25, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Anyone else get super annoyed with SS brags

    about mommy every damn day? That's all I hear every time the kid comes over. Mommy's fav color, mommy's fav song, mommy bought him this, mommy bought him that, mommy says this. UGHHHH I can't. It annoys my bf too because he will tell him to stop talking about mommy. But...
    krazykristen krazykristen 22-25, F 5 Responses 2 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel

    So my husband just recently found out he has a

    daughter that is three going on four from a one night stand! We have a daughter together also she just turned two :) but this whole thing has me going crazy! I feel guilty for feeling this way. It was just me him and our daughter and all of a sudden...boom we have another...
    msours4 msours4 26-30, F 10 Responses Jun 25, 2015

    Your Response

    Cancel

    This is to all the women out there,

    never never never ever ever married a man with kid/kids!!!!! His kid/kids will aways come first before anything else, it doesn't matter who's at fault. You will not win a losing battle. Please, I beg you to think twice or more before you say yes. Also, no one will listen to...
    Teardrop1001 Teardrop1001 36-40, F 6 Responses Jan 19, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel