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I Hate My Past

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 3,862 People

    People Think My Life Is Perfect...

    I have always been bullied since I was just starting school but that's not the thing bothering me the most... A month before I was born my dad died... It was a bad accident and it changed my life... I will never have met my real dad and my mom is the only biological parent now...
    AngryLittlePrincess AngryLittlePrincess 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 23, 2012

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    Dear Past, please stop bothering me.

    Just stop. Please. No matter how fast you run and chase me, you'll catch me anyway. No matter how hard you beat me, I'll break anyway. No matter how long you keep me awake, I won't be able to sleep anyway. No matter how many pictures you draw, I'll see them anyway. No matter how...
    crackedwriter crackedwriter 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 23

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    I hate in the past It always happen in my dream.

    I hate it. I want to forget it. Every time I try don't thought it but It will appear in my dream and then I awake up I felt sad and I thought someone who I love and I wanna forget the same time
    nimkansiri nimkansiri 22-25, F May 11

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    lonely6999 lonely6999 16-17, M 1 Response May 5

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    A pile of human skulls covered in blood.

    It seemed as if the flesh was peeled with a knife. Remains of what was once a body hanged on a tree and burnt,my father's hand pushing me down. This is my first memory of war. I didn't feel death the same way I do now. Everything appeared unreal and I was incapable of deciding...
    decentraIized decentraIized 22-25, F 4 Responses Jul 17

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    Dear past. Stop tapping me on the shoulder.

    I don't want to look back.
    Slowlydying16 Slowlydying16 16-17, F 2 Responses Jun 13, 2014

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    And yet again I'm in the bathroom,

    on the floor crying my eyes out and at the same trying to keep quite so they don't find out. I hate it so much, been going on for 5-6 years now. Can't even stand up for myself because of him, I feel isolated, my arms don't move nor my legs. I just stand there motionless trying...
    Mixedemotions2k Mixedemotions2k 13-15, M 1 Response Feb 8

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    prashuk1996 prashuk1996 18-21, M 1 Response May 3

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    ~ I Was Raped By My Uncle ~

    When I was in the 7th grade my uncle ( my dad's brother ) moved in with us , it was great at first , but one day I came home from school and my uncle was the only one there , he asked me to come to his bedroom he wanted to show me something , he told me to sit on his bed  so...
    BEAUTIFULDISASTER BEAUTIFULDISASTER 41-45, F 56 Responses Sep 8, 2006

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    I Never Wanted Anyone To Know, Really...

    Someone gave me a bit of courage yesterday, to come out about my past and just tell everything. Okay...It all started when I was about 5 or 6, my parents always treated me well, but the problem was that we only spoke Russian,my sister and I didn't know a word of English so...
    XxthedarknesswillgrowxX XxthedarknesswillgrowxX 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 9, 2011

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    I hate it when people talk about their school

    days. People get all rosary eyed and wistful telling this story and that about being happy and having fun. To my core I hate it. Usually people don't notice me go silent. It's worse when they do notice because they'll usually assume that I was popular and had no issue. I hate...
    Drcreegan Drcreegan 26-30, M 1 Response Mar 20, 2014

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    I feel like my past is going to follow me all

    my life.. I guess thts life about.. Nobody is perfect but I hate it ..
    ladany19 ladany19 22-25, F 1 Response May 21

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    Sometimes Its Not Worth It

    Lying in the dark looking at nothing closing your eyes and seeing the demons coming ever closer teasing and flitting around you. 'Remember' they say mockingly - 'never forget'. Turning over trying to think of something, anything...
    inneedofguidance inneedofguidance 31-35 5 Responses Sep 10, 2011

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    My Life... Please Don't Judge Me

    Starting with first things first. My mother gave me up for adoption but my grandparents ended up taking me instead of a family in Texas. That family died when I was 6. After that my mother tried to be involved in my life but never was, she couldn't even remember my birthday. Now...
    Itskaylababy Itskaylababy 22-25, F 1 Response Sep 22, 2012

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    I went to a SADD (students against destructive

    decisions) convention and speakers kept telling us that we should talk about stuff that we went through or that we are going through now. So I've decided to post my story I guess. I don't want people to feel bad for me or anything. I just needed to get it out because I've never...
    nobodyknows13 nobodyknows13 16-17, F 2 Responses Mar 25

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    Between stupid things I've done,

    stupid things that happen, and stupid things that I do because of stupid things that have happened, I've got myself constantly thinking
    Matthew7211 Matthew7211 13-15, M 2 Responses Mar 29

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    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Oct 30, 2014

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    Alylovespuppies Alylovespuppies 18-21, F 3 Responses May 3

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    I was abused from a very early age

    but I'm not defeated I am a survivor not a victim they may have won the battle but I'm going to win the war x
    lchainey lchainey 22-25, F 3 Responses Mar 17, 2014

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    But I Learned From It

    Even though I hate so much my past and how I wish it didn't happen.. I am still grateful for it because it helps me define my true self.... even though it hurts so much.. It still teach me a lifetime lesson... Happiness is a choice
    deleted deleted 26-30 Feb 25, 2013

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    Me

    I have been neglected, pimped and abandoned by my mother. I have been molested by my brother, sexually assaulted by my grandfather and father. I have been an addict, prostitute and ********. I have overcame major obstacles in life and am very lucky to be alive. I am here to share...
    PatyH PatyH 31-35, F 3 Responses Jun 12, 2012

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    It sounds romantic, doesn't it?

    The dream of fading away, vanishing into the night and when the sun comes up you simply cease to exist, or perhaps you become somebody new. All your troubles are left behind, you can undo every single wrong thing that you've done. It's as if you get to live another life, this...
    4inthemorningdew 4inthemorningdew 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 28, 2013

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    I wish I could just forget the past.

    It hurts way too much.
    Mariegirl1984 Mariegirl1984 31-35, F 3 Responses May 2

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    My mother has always humiliated

    and sort of abused me emotionally since I was a kid. I was a little tomboyish when I was a child and I grew up in an all-boys neighborhood. Mostly I would be with my grandparents because my mother was at work and father never around. I admit that I had no fashion-sense or...
    silverpapercut silverpapercut 18-21, F 3 Responses Jul 2

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    OK... YES, I messed up in a big,

    big way but that was in 2001 for crying out loud. I got in trouble and the law made damn sure that I suffered and believe me, I get it. So why do people (ie: my wife) still feel the need to throw it in my face 14 years later? I just want to be alone. I'm so sick of being judged...
    SRayne SRayne 51-55, M May 3

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    decentraIized decentraIized 22-25, F 12 Responses Jul 6

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    Dark Cloud

    My past has always been this dark cloud that has hung over my head, one that never seems to pass, for I just don't know how to let it go. Some parts are things I've done to myself, other parts are things that have been done towards me. But all parts are things that remain in my...
    Lucidblue Lucidblue 36-40, F 12 Responses Aug 6, 2010

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    I have done some things in my past

    that still affect my relationship now
    sadandstressed sadandstressed 16-17, F May 22

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    I have such a dark past

    that lingers in the back of my mind and sometimes it darkens my bright future and my amazing now that I'm living in
    Spfxartist13 Spfxartist13 16-17, F Jun 19

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    I Was Too Ashamed to Leave...

    I had a boyfriend, two years older, who seemed the all-american boy. He was smart, handsome, popular-- everything I wasn't in high school. I was the nerdy, frumpy, ugly duck who volunteered her weekends at soup kitchens or the library just to feel like she'd gone out at least. I...
    wolfton wolfton 18-21, F 12 Responses Oct 22, 2006

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    When a social worker tells your 14 year old self

    that I have been mentally and physically abused my whole life. People wonder why kids don't speak out until then I had no idea it wasn't normal. I didn't believe him he tried to bribe me with a mars bar :/ police shouting at me to answer there questions outside the interview...
    rbambro rbambro 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 6

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    Forward

    Memories of eternal days, Left thy heart in holy grave From hatred of unusual pay Take my soul and be brave...
    eaden594 eaden594 16-17, M Jan 15, 2013

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    My Days As An Orphan

    "Natasha,...Does it hurt?" Said the boy on the bed next to me. I looked down to my hands, there wasn't really much to see since the lights were out, but I could feel the wounds and the torn skin.It was hard looking him back in the eyes. I don't remember his name really, but I do...
    NatashaBluerain NatashaBluerain 22-25, F 1 Response Sep 4, 2012

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    I don't tell many people about my past.

    I may tell them a little, but I never tell them everything unless I completely trust them. Maybe one day I'll be able to tell someone about my past.
    GreenDayIsBae GreenDayIsBae 16-17, M 1 Response Jul 11

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    I am never hate my past.

    I am never hate anyone to come through in life.I blamed myself to ruined everything .Everything is a choice.
    nimkansiri nimkansiri 22-25, F 2 Responses May 3

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    darkangellights darkangellights 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 23

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    Am I the only one that has allowed their past

    to mold them into something they regret.
    LotusFlower22 LotusFlower22 22-25, F 5 Responses May 9

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    .....................

    .................
    decentraIized decentraIized 22-25, F 5 Responses Jul 3

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    many things i did. i can't forget in

    until now. really bad thing...
    shirosuki shirosuki 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 24

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    I've messed up so many times in the past,

    and that's tainted my future. I pray that it just won't affect what I hope to achieve.
    Lunasnight Lunasnight 16-17, F 2 Responses May 3

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    I always try and tell myself

    that "yesterday's history, tomorrow's a mystery"
    SpaceGlitch SpaceGlitch 16-17, F 2 Responses May 3

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    It makes me not allow anything good happen to

    myself. I'm always questioning everything and jumping to conclusions cause I've seen it all before but sometimes I just need to relax and enjoy myself
    acorn288 acorn288 16-17, F Mar 24

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    I just wish that I could undo some things.

    Not that I haven't learned from them or am stronger or w/e because of it.Its just, lifelong consequences really suck.I think the worst part of it is a part of myself refuses to forgive myself .Sometimes when things don't work out I say, "Yea I guess I deserve that." Even though...
    RafaReu RafaReu 22-25, M 1 Response Apr 16

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    But I Can't Fix It

    So, what's the point of complaining?I choose to live for now, and plan for the future.
    Serenitree Serenitree 70+, F Oct 14, 2012

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    EnigmaticStare EnigmaticStare 22-25, F 1 Response May 24

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    You can see a glimpse of

    who I was looking at my earlier stories. All I wanted to do was run away but I realized it's never good to run. So I'm facing this psycho who tried to ruin my life and I will win
    UnconditionallyGone UnconditionallyGone 16-17, M 4 Responses Feb 16

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