Post
Experience Project iOS Android Apps | Download EP for your Mobile Device

I Hate My Past

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 3,437 People

    Forward

    Memories of eternal days, Left thy heart in holy grave From hatred of unusual pay Take my soul and be brave...
    eaden594 eaden594 16-17, M Jan 15, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    It No Longer Controls Me

    I worked on my past a lot in therapy and now know what happened to me and why I turned out like I did. But I also learned in therapy HOW to live a better life NOW and get over my past. I can not say I am done getting over the crap that happened before but I sure am glad I have...
    jimrich jimrich 70+, M 1 Response Feb 7, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Let's just say that my growing up years was

    filled with pain and tears and alcoholic parents. And from out of this experience I learned how to be a better person and to stay away from drugs and alcohol.
    CasaBaka CasaBaka 22-25, M Dec 23, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Living In Sin And Hatred

    My past is filled regrets, shame, and hatred. I can't think about my past for too long or else I get severe anxiety. I have so much hate inside my past and I can't seem to get rid of it. There are so many events I wish I could redo and even more actions I wish I could undo. I...
    IamMorbid IamMorbid 18-21, M 3 Responses May 30, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    When I was thirteen and lived in London I was a

    bad ***.I went to boarding school for people who needed discipline.I cussed out my teacher,got into a fight with the principle (if he would've called me a damn demon from hell it would've never happened) then I broke into my aunts house and was put on house arrest.I don't like...
    DopeJay DopeJay 13-15, M 1 Response Sep 6

    Your Response

    Cancel
    thefaultinourscars thefaultinourscars 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 29

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Dear past. Stop tapping me on the shoulder.

    I don't want to look back.
    Slowlydying16 Slowlydying16 16-17, F 3 Responses Jun 13

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Worst thing that can happen is

    when your past catches up with you...
    octoberfall octoberfall 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 26

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Yea, back in the day I was just awful.

    I was one of those extremely shy, nerdy kids who didn't have any friends, couldn't talk to people, and always cried in class. I've gotten a lot better in the sense that I can talk to everybody as if we were best buddies, and I don't cry in class =_= but I'm still pretty nerdy...
    ToBeAnOtaku101 ToBeAnOtaku101 16-17, F 1 Response Aug 13

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I few month ago...hate it.

    ..mostly i get beat down at my new school...meeting teacher makes me un happy...i never put smile on my face at school
    meokeju meokeju 22-25, F Aug 29

    Your Response

    Cancel

    It sounds romantic, doesn't it?

    The dream of fading away, vanishing into the night and when the sun comes up you simply cease to exist, or perhaps you become somebody new. All your troubles are left behind, you can undo every single wrong thing that you've done. It's as if you get to live another life, this...
    4inthemorningdew 4inthemorningdew 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 28, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    People Think My Life Is Perfect...

    I have always been bullied since I was just starting school but that's not the thing bothering me the most... A month before I was born my dad died... It was a bad accident and it changed my life... I will never have met my real dad and my mom is the only biological parent now...
    AngryLittlePrincess AngryLittlePrincess 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 23, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I have serious anger issues.

    I need to start going to a counselor! Like seriously..
    lilserv04 lilserv04 16-17, M Oct 17

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Sometimes I think I will never get a girlfriend

    because I have a ****** up past
    dominick5 dominick5 13-15, M 2 Responses Aug 1

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Everything I have wrote about is my past.

    I have trouble escaping it. Maybe it's because of someone showing me a new way of life, or someone else trying to end it. But, no matter what it's always on my mind. Sometimes I'm afraid I'll never escape it. Other times I believe in the power of love and the power within me...
    FrozenDark FrozenDark 16-17, M 1 Response Oct 29

    Your Response

    Cancel
    toiletwater toiletwater 16-17, M Oct 20

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Who I Am Today?.._x

    i know you shouldn't hate your past. your past makes me whi i am today, my past is why im here right now. but what if i don't like where i am now? or who i am? if the past was different so would i be, and so would where i'd be. i do hate my past, i do hate all the things that...
    FromTheHeartOfaWoman FromTheHeartOfaWoman 22-25, F 2 Responses Feb 5, 2008

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I hate thanksgiving ,

    black friday nov 28 1997 i got married first time ;;((
    anasteel2 anasteel2 41-45, F 1 Response Nov 28

    Your Response

    Cancel

    what I hate most about it all is

    that I should have stopped it. I was far from nieve as a child but I was isolated and I had my brother to think of. I couldnt ruin everything for him, he loved his dad and im sure in his own way his dad loved him too but he could never accept me as his. I wasnt his and though I...
    FromTheHeartOfaWoman FromTheHeartOfaWoman 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 29

    Your Response

    Cancel

    theres so much that has happened

    and that is still going on. when will I finally feel any kind of contentment?
    FromTheHeartOfaWoman FromTheHeartOfaWoman 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 29

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Some things I can't let go.

    I fake a smile even though it hurts. Yes I've heard sorry but it hurts so bad I don't even know why. It's been awhile but yet I still get so pissed off. I can't act like it bothers me or I would be just silly apparently. So what the f
    sloaned sloaned 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 12

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Sometimes Its Not Worth It

    Lying in the dark looking at nothing closing your eyes and seeing the demons coming ever closer teasing and flitting around you. 'Remember' they say mockingly - 'never forget'. Turning over trying to think of something, anything...
    inneedofguidance inneedofguidance 31-35 5 Responses Sep 10, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Me

    I have been neglected, pimped and abandoned by my mother. I have been molested by my brother, sexually assaulted by my grandfather and father. I have been an addict, prostitute and ********. I have overcame major obstacles in life and am very lucky to be alive. I am here to share...
    PatyH PatyH 31-35, F 1 Response Jun 12, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    But I Can't Fix It

    So, what's the point of complaining?I choose to live for now, and plan for the future.
    Serenitree Serenitree 70+, F Oct 14, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I just wish I could forget

    and let go of it all ): I'm so tired of thinking about my past... Why can't I just forget? ):
    MusicJunkie6794 MusicJunkie6794 18-21, M 1 Response Sep 18

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Not because terrible,

    tragic things happened, but because nothing happened.
    maiomeN maiomeN 16-17, F 4 Responses Oct 30

    Your Response

    Cancel
    lilserv04 lilserv04 16-17, M Oct 1

    Your Response

    Cancel

    This is one of the many reasons I leave my

    counselors "unexpectedly",they get too close and they'll find out too much...
    xosydneeox xosydneeox 16-17, F Dec 25, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    My Days As An Orphan

    "Natasha,...Does it hurt?" Said the boy on the bed next to me. I looked down to my hands, there wasn't really much to see since the lights were out, but I could feel the wounds and the torn skin.It was hard looking him back in the eyes. I don't remember his name really, but I do...
    NatashaBluerain NatashaBluerain 22-25, F 1 Response Sep 4, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    People always define me by my past,

    but don't define me by my past because i don't live there anymore .
    ActuallyGrace ActuallyGrace 13-15, F 4 Responses Aug 29

    Your Response

    Cancel

    The past of others is what affects me.

    I thought my family was a good, happy family like they show on tv. But no, in the real world like ours, that's impossible. Cheating, arguments, debts, fights, divorce, drinking, addiction, suicide, then me. I was born. I hate the past I once knew, because everything I knew back...
    emilesfault emilesfault 16-17, M Jul 30

    Your Response

    Cancel

    What They Did, What I Did

    I was abused by the people who were supposed to love & protect me most. After years of abuse, I got out of that situation. So what do I do? I abuse myself---all through my teen years, drugs, drinking, sex---I put myself in situations very much like those from my early childhood...
    dollbaybey dollbaybey 36-40, F 2 Responses Jul 22, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I truly do. I'm trying very hard to let it go,

    not forget, just let it go. I'm tired of being a nervous wreck and being afraid to try new things just because something might happen. I want to be able to stand up to my so called friends and just be okay with existing. My past is pretty dark. Yeah I know, I'm only 19, what...
    DeathIsPartDinosaur DeathIsPartDinosaur 18-21, F 2 Responses Dec 13

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Brookedrumm Brookedrumm 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 3

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Was Too Ashamed to Leave...

    I had a boyfriend, two years older, who seemed the all-american boy. He was smart, handsome, popular-- everything I wasn't in high school. I was the nerdy, frumpy, ugly duck who volunteered her weekends at soup kitchens or the library just to feel like she'd gone out at least. I...
    wolfton wolfton 21-25, F 12 Responses Oct 22, 2006

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Dark Cloud

    My past has always been this dark cloud that has hung over my head, one that never seems to pass, for I just don't know how to let it go. Some parts are things I've done to myself, other parts are things that have been done towards me. But all parts are things that remain in my...
    Lucidblue Lucidblue 36-40, F 12 Responses Aug 6, 2010

    Your Response

    Cancel

    My Past Defines Who I Am Today...

    My past defines who I am today and I am a good person. It has not always been easy but, it has been what I needed at the time.
    tylrhere tylrhere 46-50, F 1 Response Apr 6, 2007

    Your Response

    Cancel

    But I Learned From It

    Even though I hate so much my past and how I wish it didn't happen.. I am still grateful for it because it helps me define my true self.... even though it hurts so much.. It still teach me a lifetime lesson... Happiness is a choice
    deleted deleted 26-30 Feb 25, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    If I had the chance to go back

    and change it, I would.
    sammisanin sammisanin 18-21, F Jul 30

    Your Response

    Cancel

    At One Time I Did

    There was a time in my llife when I would have said that I hated my past. From the time that I was a very young child up until the time that I was seventeen I dealt with abuse on many different levels. I only had one adut in my life that I did not suffer abuse from. To just make...
    washio2005 washio2005 26-30, F 1 Response Sep 24, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I hate my past but I've grown

    and learned from it is what counts!
    Diamond1029 Diamond1029 16-17, F Dec 12

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Trapped

    My past is what defines me. It has leeched my confidence It has destroyed my faith and trust in people It has robbed me of my ability to feel And now, my soul mate stands with me, but sometimes I can't even feel him Because I'm so wrapped up in protecting myself from myself...
    Shadowhunter64 Shadowhunter64 18-21, F 7 Responses Jun 29, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    There are plenty of things I've done

    that I wish I hadn't. Probably plenty of things I haven't done that I wish I had! 'Regret is an inevitable consequence of life' Don't you think?
    picklebobble picklebobble 46-50, M 1 Response Oct 30

    Your Response

    Cancel

    My step cozin litte bother died last week.

    He was a x drug user for a year until last he did heriome and died. My step cozin found her litte dead on the floor in his room. My mom was crying over it. I didn't know him but I still feeled sad he was 24 and dried of a drugs overdotes. I thought just wow.
    dominick5 dominick5 13-15, M 3 Responses Jul 17

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I hate it when people talk about their school

    days. People get all rosary eyed and wistful telling this story and that about being happy and having fun. To my core I hate it. Usually people don't notice me go silent. It's worse when they do notice because they'll usually assume that I was popular and had no issue. I hate...
    Drcreegan Drcreegan 26-30, M Mar 20

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Everyday I Would Get Sad :(

    My story isnt as horrible as some of the stories on here but for me i hate my past so i wanted to share my story. It all started when i was around 8 years old. Before that, everyday i went to school and i liked it. I had friends and it was generally a nice atmosphere. Then my...
    Lemonandlime09 Lemonandlime09 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 28, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I just can't seem to let it all go :/ It just

    keeps replaying over and over and over in my mind :/
    K33024W K33024W 13-15 1 Response Oct 29

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Never Wanted Anyone To Know, Really...

    Someone gave me a bit of courage yesterday, to come out about my past and just tell everything. Okay...It all started when I was about 5 or 6, my parents always treated me well, but the problem was that we only spoke Russian,my sister and I didn't know a word of English so...
    XxthedarknesswillgrowxX XxthedarknesswillgrowxX 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 9, 2011

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I was abused from a very early age

    but I'm not defeated I am a survivor not a victim they may have won the battle but I'm going to win the war x
    lchainey lchainey 18-21, F 3 Responses Mar 17

    Your Response

    Cancel
    heyitsabike heyitsabike 31-35, F 3 Responses Oct 30

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I don't like my past

    but it made me the person I am today and never forget that u might hate your past but your past is what makes you you
    dominick6 dominick6 13-15, M Oct 4

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Why can't the past be what it says it is.

    ... the PAST!? instead I get reminded of it all the time!
    overit321 overit321 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 18