I Hate My Stepdaughter

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 843 People

    Warning For A Potential Stepmother Or Stepfather: Are You Making The Right Decision?

    I'm writing this in the hope that it will be found through a Google search by some person who is considering getting married to a person with children. To be honest, if I had read this before I got married I'm not sure it would have changed anything.  But at least I can say...
    FrustratedSF1 FrustratedSF1
    31-35, M
    137 Responses May 13, 2010

    We had a big fight, where DH declared I was not

    loving enough. I angrily demanded examples & proof. He couldn't find any fault in my behavior, I do all the required mom things, it's just that I wasn't doing them with a smile and chipper greeting for his brat. I was FURIOUS, took my engagement ring off & handed it over...
    VickySpirit VickySpirit
    41-45, F
    Mar 23

    HAVE U TOLD YOUR PARTNER!

    !?? i was wondering if anybody has mention to there partners about been part of this group???
    Thatinkedlovexo Thatinkedlovexo
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Feb 8

    My SD is always doing this weird grunting,

    moaning and groaning sort of noise. Almost sounds like she is having a hard time breathing or is maybe in pain. I ask her when she's doing it if she is okay or hurting or something. She says shes fine and has no idea she's doing it. I will tell her when shes doing it, she says...
    mouthymomma mouthymomma
    26-30
    3 Responses Mar 19

    I have read a lot of the posts here

    and its such a relief to know that I'm not the horribly awful person that i was starting to feel like i was. This is all very new for me. My husband and i have been together for just over 14years. He has a 14 year-old daughter. She was born two months before we started...
    christine434 christine434
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Jan 2

    Not sure if troll, or just stupid.

    .. *snicker* I know you've all seen the self righteous trolls on our threads, their "oh my god you are such a horrible person" responses, and I'm sure many of you have been recipients of their venom. Don't they remind you, friends, of the skids we are posting about from our...
    VickySpirit VickySpirit
    41-45, F
    Dec 5, 2015

    So, this is interesting: I'm out of town on a

    business trip, and I see an email from SD's teacher, that she got a pink slip at recess today for tackling some kid on the playground. But that's not why the teacher is emailing, she's emailing because SD has created such melodrama around this event, claiming that she's going to...
    VickySpirit VickySpirit
    41-45, F
    Feb 10

    Interesting new tactic; I don't point out

    anything negative about my skid (9) to her dad. She's so blatantly selfish and pouty that it's impossible not to notice, and I've begun to realize that if I point it out first, he - because he was thinking the same negative thought, but was feeling guilty because he should...
    VickySpirit VickySpirit
    41-45, F
    Nov 7, 2015

    Happy Mother's Day to all my fellow posters.

    Hope your day was peaceful and free of SD drama!!!
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    4 Responses May 10, 2015

    She is spoiled. Selfish.

    Self centred. Privileged. Expensively educated. Rude. All complicated by the fact that I find her very physically attractive.
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Dec 3, 2015

    this message is directed at those

    who would tell stepmothers what they "should" or "shouldn't" feel, say, do, or write about our situations. please take your judgment elsewhere. we have no need for your self-righteous scolding. we need a safe place to vent our frustrations, so the feelings that you judge us for...
    tryingtobeamazing tryingtobeamazing
    41-45, F
    4 Responses Sep 27, 2015

    How To Keep Your Stepdaughters Away From Your House

    Ladies, after reading lots of posts here on how much we hate our SDs, well, I am half way through on banning them from visiting my house, at least for a while. Really hope that those of you who are suffering from the pain that your SDs caused you, will soon deserve the true love...
    Janicemann Janicemann
    22-25
    16 Responses Jun 16, 2012

    Oh Can't You Quit Your Complaining?!

    All in all? Most of you sound jealous your husbands (or boyfriends) care more about their daughters than you. 'WAH I HATE MY STEPDAUGHTER. she gets more attention from me than my husbandddddd. she eats at home. he helps pay to take care of her. she has a learning disability...
    ttopper ttopper
    18-21
    13 Responses Nov 26, 2011

    Please read this. I'm not a stepmother; Far

    from it, actually, but I'll explain that later. I thought I needed to post this because I think I can help. Please, please, /please/ be patient with your stepchildren. I've read through some of these, and think I can help, but I can't talk to you all individually, so I pray to...
    GasMasksAndCaffiene GasMasksAndCaffiene
    13-15, F
    2 Responses Jan 6

    just bought a paternity test.

    praying that 4 year old banshee isn't his so I can get her out of my life.
    chocolatediamonds89 chocolatediamonds89
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Feb 17

    Well, here it is again,

    another holiday ruined. No only was it valentines day, but our anniversary too..on top of that my daughter (13months old) has a fracture wrist. And that damn SD ruined the whole weekend. Not only did my hubby get the girls gifts and chocolate we were going to shop that sunday...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Feb 14
    Lori2002 Lori2002
    18-21, F
    6 Responses Sep 26, 2015

    I just wanted to let you all know

    that I am thankful for you. For the validation of my feelings, from realizing I am not alone, for making me laugh and making me feel stronger. You are where I turn when I can't say how I feel to anyone else - you help me remember my humanity and that it's ok to throw in the...
    tiredSM tiredSM
    36-40
    2 Responses Nov 29, 2015

    Getting Rid of Yur Stepdaughter

    I wanted to share my story because like all of you I hate my stepdaughter! However, I took action and got rid of her, from my life at least. I live with my fiance who had is 8 year old daughter every weekend when we first started dating. A year and a half later he sees her 3 to 4...
    cellens11 cellens11
    18-21
    203 Responses Jul 25, 2009

    this morning, at 4:45 am,

    i gently touched my sweet sleeping husband to awaken him, as he had instructed the ex to drop off SD at 5am for their trip today. he's taking her to NYC for an anniversary celebration hosted by his favorite publisher. i made him coffee, helped him pack a lunch, and kissed him...
    tryingtobeamazing tryingtobeamazing
    41-45, F
    1 Response Apr 18, 2015

    I have two stepdaughters.

    Their mom is pure evil. I didn't realize that a person could be so evil until I encountered her. I also tried to give her the benefit of the doubt by thinking she was just going through a phase. My husband and his ex had been divorced for quite some time before I ever even...
    badmama2 badmama2
    36-40, F
    4 Responses Dec 29, 2015

    I feel like I just hit the lotto!

    !! My husbands mom had a DNA test done and she is NOT his kid!!
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    4 Responses Dec 8, 2015

    It was so fun the other day,

    to get to respond to my SD's comment that she's got big strong arms with "nope, that's a fat little arm" to which she replies "well, I guess I still have some baby fat" and I say "You are 10 years old, if you were 4 you could call it baby fat. Now it's just fat" Even more fun...
    VickySpirit VickySpirit
    41-45, F
    Mar 8

    She wants to move back in.

    Before I married my husband a decade ago, he promised that I would only be dealing with the one stepdaughter because the other from another mother, was stable (Nurse). The youngest one announced at age nine that she would be coming to live with us at 12 y.o.. Well she was...
    ohmylordie ohmylordie
    56-60, F
    Apr 15

    I hate my step daughter.

    There I said it. Going to try and keep this somewhat short but I need to vent. I met a man at my workplace, we fell in love, got married. I knew he had a daughter from a previous marriage, she is 15 and my now husband is 35. He (and sort of his grandmother) raised her by himself...
    Kristofferson44 Kristofferson44
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jan 28

    We've Been Infiltrated!

    Yes, ladies. Some little pouty stepdaughter whose daddy dared to marry another woman is posting in our group now. Expect very soon to see her nasty little posts on your experiences. She'll no doubt leave you a little quip full of her huffing and puffing, cursing us evil witches...
    Milktheostrich Milktheostrich
    26-30, F
    6 Responses Jul 10, 2012

    I am sitting here once again dreading Sunday,

    because that's when SD7 and SD5 arrive and ruin everything until my partner drops them off at school on Monday morning. We have them every Sunday overnight, and then again on Tuesday evenings. I know it's not much, but it makes me crazy. Every Sunday becomes all about SD7 (who...
    reluctantstepmom reluctantstepmom
    36-40, F
    3 Responses Apr 25, 2015

    An actual sentence I had to say last night,

    as DH claimed we needed to adjust our wedding plans- so that his daughter's feelings were not hurt by us getting married & not involving her in the ceremony: "Great. When SHE marries her Daddy, then she can have say in the wedding planning." That went over like a flaming bag...
    VickySpirit VickySpirit
    41-45, F
    4 Responses Jan 6

    My sd13 has finally come to her senses.

    She's finally realized that, after almost a year, her mother is lying about going back to court for her. She just keeps having more kids instead. She'll be pregnant again soon. We're getting along fine now. My problem now is with my other sd3. She drives me crazy! She's super...
    evilstepmom25 evilstepmom25
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Jan 6

    Starting to really feel like my 14yr

    relationship with my husband is down the tubes. I have one foot out the door and am really ready to just walk. Tonight he had the nerve to tell me that I have a mental problem because I can't stand his rude ungrateful kid, and EVERYONE he's talked to about it agrees. Who the...
    christine434 christine434
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Jan 8

    I'm beginning to feel that

    as long as there is the stepkid in one's life, you will always be miserable when she is there and it will never improve. From time to time, there may be the illusion of advancement, but it's only temporary. I've read through everyone's stories and most people say it either...
    MargeSimpson31 MargeSimpson31
    31-35, F
    10 Responses Nov 10, 2015

    We moved last year in an attempt to give SD a

    "fresh start" - she had been such a bully and **** in school that even if she wanted to be a good kid, no teacher or classmates would ever give her the chance. This seemed to be a great move. She graduated this year from her "special Ed" (basically just time outs to deal with...
    VickySpirit VickySpirit
    41-45, F
    Jan 25

    Teaching little fatty how to count calories.

    DH told her she needed to exercise. And though there are a million ways to exercise, I saw this question coming - "can I use your treadmill?" -spoken sweetly in front of dad. Translation: can I have unlimited access to your office, (currently off limits to her) and claim...
    VickySpirit VickySpirit
    41-45, F
    Feb 15

    Even though she is no longer in my home,

    of course the drama just continues. Funny thing is, I am actually starting to feel bad for the kid. How could she not be messed up with the people she has as role models. Especially her mother. So now, my husbands daughter supposedly told her mom that I told her that her...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    2 Responses Sep 14, 2015

    Okay... Here's some Sunday morning humour

    for anyone who's interested: My step-daughter has this double personality whereby she acts sweet as pie in front of my husband, yet as soon as he's out of sight, glares at me with eyes that cut right through me. This little game began when she was three. She's now nine. I've...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    4 Responses Nov 23, 2014

    I just found out the SD blocked me on social

    media :/ I texted her "Happy New Year. Enjoy." Because she went out of town to celebrate. She's so rude, she didn't even reply. She will turn 21 next month. I don't think she needs to live with us anymore.
    Fellapart Fellapart
    36-40, F
    3 Responses Jan 3

    Snapped. But not in a violent

    or obvious way. Just done now. Completely apathetic. I just cry. And sleep. I can usually hold it together, if my only stress is the skid. But lately I've had work stress & my mother is a mess; have you ever watched an aging narcissist? As they get older they run out of cons and...
    VickySpirit VickySpirit
    41-45, F
    Feb 29

    I am engaged and we recently moved in together.

    He has 3 kids...only 1 who visits every weekend. I have 2 boys full time. His 4 yr old daughter is a nightmare. She is bossy to my boys and I and her daddy gives her whatever she wants. She does not have a bedtime when she is here and she cries if he doesn't sleep with her. She...
    mortician87 mortician87
    26-30, F
    52 Responses Feb 5, 2014

    I wish she could just visit in the summers

    or on weekends like most normal stepchildren. But, no her sorry mother gave her away and SD prefers to live here because she says she gets more privileges than with bio mom. I am just getting burned out. I have to take her everywhere; to school and then come back out to pick her...
    Februarychic Februarychic
    36-40, F
    1 Response Feb 15, 2014

    I have a 5 year old step daughter

    which lives with her mom and only visits every other weekend. I have no issues with her. But I also have a 2 year old step daughter that lives with us full time and no matter what I can not make myself like her! She is too attached to her daddy. She follows him e everywhere...
    Ashes86d Ashes86d
    26-30, F
    5 Responses Oct 5, 2015

    When my son wakes up really early I take him to

    the living room and put him in his swing while I lay on the couch. In doing so this morning I did not hear my sd3 take down her baby gate, sneak into my bedroom, get into my makeup, and take her father's phone into her room to play. I am furious. I'm at my wits end and do not...
    evilstepmom25 evilstepmom25
    26-30, F
    1 Response Jan 7

    This Is What Worked For Me...It's Called

    I won't bore you all with my story of the evil troll I am loath to call my step-daughter. I have the same stories as almost everyone here...some worse, some better. The only difference is the way in which I decided to deal. On another site I came across an idea that seem to fit...
    USinUK USinUK
    41-45, F
    2 Responses Nov 14, 2013

    I'm counting down the days

    until my narcissistic little step daughter comes to visit. She'll be here six days. I'm dreading it. On the bright side, I only have 14 weeks of her over the next 2 years--but she's going to be in my home going through my things, manipulating her father, and telling lies. It's...
    maemaddy maemaddy
    36-40
    4 Responses Feb 6, 2014

    My husband have a daughter outside of our kids

    (his first) she have 2 older sisters and my in laws wants me to be involved with them as well. My is not involved with them only his daughter. yes when they were together he acted as a father figure to them. he's not with their mom anymore and I hate that they want me involved...
    rvic2010 rvic2010
    22-25, F
    1 Response Apr 17

    So, having been slapped back down emotionally,

    like some sort of punching clown, I've re-remembered why I kept my true thoughts and feelings for this fat little skid under wraps. DH doesn't take kindly to anything less than utter delight in his horrible child. Oops, silly me. I used to be so good at this game. I let my...
    VickySpirit VickySpirit
    41-45, F
    Mar 22

    So things just don't get better with this child.

    She was here for the weekend and literally failed to turn off the light EVERY SINGLE TIME she left a room. Including leaving her closet light on constantly. I had a talk with her yesterday about not shutting the front door all the way when she comes in or out and she needs to...
    mouthymomma mouthymomma
    26-30
    2 Responses Jan 31

    Feeling Helpless to My Stepdaughter's Cruelty

    Hi... I am feeling completely helpless to deal with my stepdaughter's cruelty toward me.  Hopefully some of you can offer a few words of advise, or maybe just relate to my dilemma. I don't have any children of my own, and I am newly married to a man who has two grown...
    DeserveBetterThanThis DeserveBetterThanThis
    46-50
    31 Responses Dec 25, 2008

    I'm new here and for the past year I felt I was

    being too mean or harsh on my SD5yo. I kept questioning myself like how could you not like a 4-t yo child? it really are me up inside bc I felt that was not normal to not like a child (yes she's given me plenty of reasons to dislike her and now it's to the point I hate to even...
    rvic2010 rvic2010
    22-25, F
    Mar 27

    You're not obligated to like your stepkids

    and the kids mom will constantly try and break u up. Thats typical anyway. How to deal? My advice is to assert your role as dominate. If your relationship lasts I would suggest u equate you with him/her leaving. Never be with him when picking her up, and refuse any bonding...
    Unqu1etm1nd Unqu1etm1nd
    26-30, F
    1 Response Feb 16

    It's been not even a week

    since I wrote in here. And when I did, I was very angry. I don't take anything back, but find myself wondering if there is something I can do to better herself. She doesn't seem to want to change, and ive delt with addicts, can't help those who don't help themselves. I just wish...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Feb 19

    I don't think I have much more to give,

    and I don't think I want to try. SD is our of control and hey family isn't helping the situation. she's almost 10. she doesn't clean, can't brush her hair, doesn't know anything, and throws a fit like a four year old.she told me this week she doesn't like me and i ruin...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Mar 8

    Noo!! This site cannot go down!

    I have been SD free for about 11 months. I just found out that SD is coming not this weekend, but the next. I am already dreading it and filled with so much anxiety! It's been so unbelievably nice not having her around and just enjoying my family. We moved to a new city and...
    2Loves1Hate 2Loves1Hate
    26-30, F
    1 Response Apr 13

    Lazy Saturday morning,

    hubby & I had coffee, he pulled my papasan chair so it was facing his recliner & put my feet in his legs. We surfed Christmas music and enjoyed the decorations. SD hovered, seething. Danced in front of us dramatically, trying to get daddy's undivided attention. I said nothing...
    VickySpirit VickySpirit
    41-45, F
    Dec 5, 2015

    A message to the people

    who like to read our stories and post their comments on how hateful we are: SHUT THE HELL UP. This is a forum of support and understanding. As step-parents, we are all struggling with our issues regarding our SKs. That's why we post our stories and feelings here; to rant, to...
    Milktheostrich Milktheostrich
    26-30, F
    5 Responses Dec 19, 2013

    So the bitchy bio-mom finally took the hint

    and is going back to after school care instead of taking advantage of me 3 days a week after school. I've thrilled, BUT I have to hide it from DH who is so sad to "miss out now on seeing (SD) every day" Whatever, my Darling Hubby - you feel all the sad feels... lol. I'm...
    VickySpirit VickySpirit
    41-45, F
    Mar 10

    So I told my husband

    that he needs to consider allowing his daughter stay in MO when she goes for the summer. This morning, I dropped his daughter off at the bus stop and by the time I had returned back to the house, I had an email from her teacher stating that she has gotten in trouble yet again...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Apr 30, 2015

    Today's quote of the day!

    "The greatest prison people live in is the fear of what other people think." I am convinced that we sometimes run ourselves into the ground over the fear of what people think. We go above and beyond the call of duty trying our best to not have people view us as the evil...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    3 Responses Oct 8, 2015

    Hello lovely people. First off I'd like to say

    how much of a relief it is to read all of your posts and know I am not alone. I'm 20 yrs old. I've been married for a year and been with my husband for 2 1/2 and we've know each other for 4 yrs now. His daughter is 4. I'm 39 weeks pregnant and expecting a boy. I hate my step...
    LovelyLizzy997 LovelyLizzy997
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Mar 19

    **WAIST OF OUR TIME** my husband has a

    daughter that's 5 years old she comes over every other weekend because she lives 2 hrs away which is really annoying because when we pick her up it takes us 4 hrs for the whole trip on Friday afternon and then on Sunday afternoon i feel like its such a waist of time and then on...
    Thatinkedlovexo Thatinkedlovexo
    18-21, F
    Feb 7
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