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I Have a Bizarre Sense of Humour

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 305 People

    Things I Think Are Funny...

    Things I find funny are usually not very funny to everyone else. Weird things like if someone says "monkey goo bar har har...?! " make me laugh so much more than people who have pre prepared "jokes" they've told a million times. (I do realise that monkey goo...
    Ladyhazasecret Ladyhazasecret 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 8, 2009

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    Quite...

    But then again it could have been this. Or that.
    deleted deleted 26-30 Mar 6, 2009

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    Wisdom / Knowledge

    Phillip - "Subtle sweetness and a ripe sour flavor!" Tom - "Delicious! Firm texture and terrific paired with bacon and lettuce served on toasted bread!" Phillip - "Splendid! What shall we name this new fruit we discovered?" Chumley "Tomato!" Phillip - "..." Tom - "..." Phillip...
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 3 Responses Aug 7, 2013

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    Delete Scenes (Ep1)

    Open Scene: Ubiquitous blue desk and backgound Cookie Monster : (growling crunching cookies with veracity of a shark attack) Om nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom...
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 3 Responses Aug 5, 2013

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    5000+ Thai women are seeking love in your

    area Honey? HONEY!?! Grab the kids and hide in the basement! Lock the door!!! :::my past, it seems, has finally caught up with me:::
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 3 Responses Jul 6

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    Yep, That's Me!

    Bizarre, or twisted, or warped, or something like that.  My coworkers tell me I have a strange sense of humor.  They have no idea how much I censor myself at work! Love the logo of this group, by the way.  My beloved cracked up over it. :-)  E. Bunbury
    EBunbury EBunbury 46-50, M Jun 1, 2008

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    I Know, I Don't Seem Like It

    But I do have a bizarre sense of humour... I'm usually just too scared of freaking people out or offending them to use it here ... or in 'real life' lol. Got to tone it down. And sometimes I can't strike a balance between bizarre and boring and wind up in the lame zone. That's...
    sugarburn sugarburn 22-25, F 4 Responses Jan 27, 2009

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    [Somewhere at a Whole Foods] Kanye: Pardon me

    sir, would you have pumpkin? Whole Foods Drone: (hands Kanye a pumpkin) here. Kanye: No no NO! PUMPKIN! It's a type of SPICE!
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 2 Responses Sep 11

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    Hillarious Doctor M

    Hi, i'm Monstermaster13. If my username is any indication, I have a strange and off-kilter sense of humour. If my stories are any indication....I love making fun of cliches especially horror cliches. My werecreature parodies like the werejohncandy and so on are perfect...
    Monstermaster13 Monstermaster13 22-25, M Mar 22, 2013

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    http://www.experienceproject.

    com/stories/Just-Have-To-Say/4445569
    OddlyScintilating OddlyScintilating 46-50, M Jun 22

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    Just Check Me Out

    If you read what I've scrbbled on the EP walls you'll see that I have a twisted sense of humor, mostly dark.  Or not, depending on your own bent.
    dorobo dorobo 70+, M 4 Responses May 4, 2008

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    So Many Secrets

    The cast of Jersey Shore skateboards down the street, going door-to-door, searching for who knows what... "Honey!" I yell. "HONEY!!! Get the kids and go to the basement!!! Lock the door!!!" 'My past, it seems, has finally caught up with me...'
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 3 Responses Aug 5, 2013

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    Kanye: "I guess the person I was looking

    for was in front of me all along." Me: "That's a mirror." Kanye: [nods] "It feels right."
    tenente tenente 31-35, M Jul 12

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    Who Me?

    If I did I would not be laughing at it. Ha!
    deleted deleted 26-30 Apr 3, 2009

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    Kanye World (Ep6) "Will you go to prom with me?

    " Kanye, I'm your dad. "AND DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH COURAGE IT TOOK TO ASK?!?"
    tenente tenente 31-35, M Apr 13

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    Kanye World (Ep2)

    Opening Scene: Kanye, in a green friendly apron, is stacking soup can pyramids at the local Whole Foods. Jennifer, a middle aged mother of two, approaches Kanye, distressed and in need of assistance. Jennifer: (fidgeting with her grocery bag) Excuse me? Mister Kanye? Where...
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 1 Response Aug 13, 2013

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    Kanye World (Ep3)

    Open Scene: Kanye strolls in a park down a winding dirt path beside a pond. He notices his reflection in the calm water. Kanye : (leaps to the edge of the pond; throwing fists at the water; splashing; screaming) HANG ON OTHER KANYE!!! I WILL RELEASE YOU!!!!!!
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 2 Responses Aug 20, 2013

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    Kanye World (Ep4)

    Open Scene: Kanye at the midway. Kanye : (Leaping to the front of the line, waiving his wallet and pushing past others waiting patiently.) 'How much for the horse tornado?' Carney : (Rolls eyes) 'Sir, that's a carousel...' Kanye : (Lifts Carney off the ground by his lapels...
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 2 Responses Aug 23, 2013

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    Awkward.

    I know it sounds alwful, but have you ever found the need to laugh at something completely NOT funny or awkward? I remember a friend of mine a few years ago came into school and told me her dog died and I just burst into fits of laughter, and I just couldn't stop! Not because I...
    AllyJG AllyJG 16-17, F 1 Response Jan 21, 2011

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    Wanted

    - I am quite sure most of you have seen the rather large green dragon that has been flying over northeast Buffalo,NY for the better part of a week. I am looking for someone to: 1) Lure said dragon away from Buffalo, NY to a more rural area (ie. Canada.) 2) Force said dragon to...
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 4 Responses Nov 14, 2013

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    Kanye World (Ep1)

    [Kanye Steps Up To The Podium] "At last, 5-out-of-5 Dentists agree..." "Uhhh, Excuse me Kanye!? Umm, why does that Dentist have a neck brace on???..." "5-OUT-OF-5 DENTISTS AGREE!!!!..." D:
    tenente tenente 31-35, M Aug 5, 2013

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    My Sense of Humour Can Cert...

    My sense of humour can certainly be called bizarre, but I call it more warped than anything.
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jan 27, 2009

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    Kanye World (Ep5)

    Open Scene: Kanye at his girlfriend Miko's apartment. Kanye : (Holding Miko in a loving embrace) 'Wow baby, you changed your makeup in 26 different hot ways?' Miko : (Smiling at Kanye, knowingly) 'MMMhmmm, you like that baby?...' Kanye : (Leans in slowly whispering into Miko's...
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 2 Responses Aug 28, 2013

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    My type of humor ranges from childish, corny, sometimes sacriligious, sometimes politically incorrect *I keep those "sometimes" discreet otherwise I will be hunted by an angry mob...
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    Our manager at the restaurant where I worked was a friendly, jovial man. But there was one subject you didn't dare discuss in front of him--his height. Or, should I say, his lack...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 5 Responses Dec 11

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    I have a very low self-esteem. Like I like my body, but I hate my face. I took the manly features of my dad's face and my mom's hair. I have a big head for my height too. And it's...
    azngirl123 azngirl123 16-17, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    so my ex-BFF just totally destroyed me, just riipped me out of her life(besides the fact i see her every day at school) now i will refrain from cursing so i can post this but hes...
    DaveEatsToast DaveEatsToast 13-15, M 1 Response Dec 1

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    And my alters have decided that they have found us the one. I'm just wondering if anyone else has alters like mine. Because of my alters all being me, and the fact that I have no...
    AbyssalSilence AbyssalSilence 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 24

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    If you're a skeptic, disbeliever, or just wave this off as silly, let's be nice and stop reading. Do you have an animal spirit? Are you a vampire? Have you been possessed? Are you...
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    If you're a skeptic, disbeliever, or just wave this off as silly, let's be nice and stop reading. Do you have an animal spirit? Are you a vampire? Have you been possessed? Are you...
    KizunaXIII KizunaXIII 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 2

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    I was reading about how according to one psychologist, women want a man who is a humour generator, while men seek a humour appreciator. This might be true, but then I don't analyse...
    HolmesGirl HolmesGirl 51-55, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    Weird doesn't quite seem to cover it actually. My sense of humour is pretty arrogant. I dunno, I seem to come across as totally up myself. I think. Haha. I guess that's because I...
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    My sense of humor seems to range from bizarre to downright terrifying. As odd as it sounds, I find pooping in odd locations (while skydiving, in a mud bath at a spa, while scaling...
    beatingdepression beatingdepression 22-25, M Dec 16

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    Men at 25 play football. Men at 40 play tennis Men at 60 play golf Have you noticed that as you get older you balls get smaller?
    mr8bitmonster mr8bitmonster 18-21, M 1 Response 2 days ago

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    If people were able to hear the next 5 seconds after we hit end call, none of us would have any friends
    mr8bitmonster mr8bitmonster 18-21, M 1 Response 2 days ago

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    We all have that one friend who makes everything sexual
    mr8bitmonster mr8bitmonster 18-21, M 2 Responses 1 day ago

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    And suddenly,this phrase started to sound alien because its not such a regular standard anymore. It's a pity but equally fun to watch people get occupied by a 'mammoth' for a task...
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