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I Have a Bizarre Sense of Humour

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 275 People

    Delete Scenes (Ep1)

    Open Scene: Ubiquitous blue desk and backgound Cookie Monster : (growling crunching cookies with veracity of a shark attack) Om nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom...
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 3 Responses Aug 5, 2013

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    Kanye World (Ep4)

    Open Scene: Kanye at the midway. Kanye : (Leaping to the front of the line, waiving his wallet and pushing past others waiting patiently.) 'How much for the horse tornado?' Carney : (Rolls eyes) 'Sir, that's a carousel...' Kanye : (Lifts Carney off the ground by his lapels...
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 2 Responses Aug 23, 2013

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    Wisdom / Knowledge

    Phillip - "Subtle sweetness and a ripe sour flavor!" Tom - "Delicious! Firm texture and terrific paired with bacon and lettuce served on toasted bread!" Phillip - "Splendid! What shall we name this new fruit we discovered?" Chumley "Tomato!" Phillip - "..." Tom - "..." Phillip...
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 3 Responses Aug 7, 2013

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    Who Me?

    If I did I would not be laughing at it. Ha!
    deleted deleted 26-30 Apr 3, 2009

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    So Many Secrets

    The cast of Jersey Shore skateboards down the street, going door-to-door, searching for who knows what... "Honey!" I yell. "HONEY!!! Get the kids and go to the basement!!! Lock the door!!!" 'My past, it seems, has finally caught up with me...'
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 3 Responses Aug 5, 2013

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    5000+ Thai women are seeking love in your

    area Honey? HONEY!?! Grab the kids and hide in the basement! Lock the door!!! :::my past, it seems, has finally caught up with me:::
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 1 Response Jul 6

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    http://www.experienceproject.

    com/stories/Just-Have-To-Say/4445569
    converted converted 46-50, M Jun 22

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    Kanye World (Ep3)

    Open Scene: Kanye strolls in a park down a winding dirt path beside a pond. He notices his reflection in the calm water. Kanye : (leaps to the edge of the pond; throwing fists at the water; splashing; screaming) HANG ON OTHER KANYE!!! I WILL RELEASE YOU!!!!!!
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 2 Responses Aug 20, 2013

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    Kanye: "I guess the person I was looking

    for was in front of me all along." Me: "That's a mirror." Kanye: [nods] "It feels right."
    tenente tenente 31-35, M Jul 12

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    Kanye World (Ep1)

    [Kanye Steps Up To The Podium] "At last, 5-out-of-5 Dentists agree..." "Uhhh, Excuse me Kanye!? Umm, why does that Dentist have a neck brace on???..." "5-OUT-OF-5 DENTISTS AGREE!!!!..." D:
    tenente tenente 31-35, M Aug 5, 2013

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    Wanted

    - I am quite sure most of you have seen the rather large green dragon that has been flying over northeast Buffalo,NY for the better part of a week. I am looking for someone to: 1) Lure said dragon away from Buffalo, NY to a more rural area (ie. Canada.) 2) Force said dragon to...
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 4 Responses Nov 14, 2013

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    Hillarious Doctor M

    Hi, i'm Monstermaster13. If my username is any indication, I have a strange and off-kilter sense of humour. If my stories are any indication....I love making fun of cliches especially horror cliches. My werecreature parodies like the werejohncandy and so on are perfect...
    Monstermaster13 Monstermaster13 22-25, M Mar 22, 2013

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    Kanye World (Ep6) "Will you go to prom with me?

    " Kanye, I'm your dad. "AND DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH COURAGE IT TOOK TO ASK?!?"
    tenente tenente 31-35, M Apr 13

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    Yep, That's Me!

    Bizarre, or twisted, or warped, or something like that.  My coworkers tell me I have a strange sense of humor.  They have no idea how much I censor myself at work! Love the logo of this group, by the way.  My beloved cracked up over it. :-)  E. Bunbury
    EBunbury EBunbury 46-50, M Jun 1, 2008

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    Just Check Me Out

    If you read what I've scrbbled on the EP walls you'll see that I have a twisted sense of humor, mostly dark.  Or not, depending on your own bent.
    dorobo dorobo 70+, M 4 Responses May 4, 2008

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    I Know, I Don't Seem Like It

    But I do have a bizarre sense of humour... I'm usually just too scared of freaking people out or offending them to use it here ... or in 'real life' lol. Got to tone it down. And sometimes I can't strike a balance between bizarre and boring and wind up in the lame zone. That's...
    sugarburn sugarburn 22-25, F 4 Responses Jan 27, 2009

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    Kanye World (Ep5)

    Open Scene: Kanye at his girlfriend Miko's apartment. Kanye : (Holding Miko in a loving embrace) 'Wow baby, you changed your makeup in 26 different hot ways?' Miko : (Smiling at Kanye, knowingly) 'MMMhmmm, you like that baby?...' Kanye : (Leans in slowly whispering into Miko's...
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 2 Responses Aug 28, 2013

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    My Sense of Humour Can Cert...

    My sense of humour can certainly be called bizarre, but I call it more warped than anything.
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jan 27, 2009

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    Quite...

    But then again it could have been this. Or that.
    deleted deleted 26-30 Mar 6, 2009

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    Awkward.

    I know it sounds alwful, but have you ever found the need to laugh at something completely NOT funny or awkward? I remember a friend of mine a few years ago came into school and told me her dog died and I just burst into fits of laughter, and I just couldn't stop! Not because I...
    AllyJG AllyJG 16-17, F 1 Response Jan 21, 2011

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    Things I Think Are Funny...

    Things I find funny are usually not very funny to everyone else. Weird things like if someone says "monkey goo bar har har...?! " make me laugh so much more than people who have pre prepared "jokes" they've told a million times. (I do realise that monkey goo...
    Ladyhazasecret Ladyhazasecret 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 8, 2009

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    Kanye World (Ep2)

    Opening Scene: Kanye, in a green friendly apron, is stacking soup can pyramids at the local Whole Foods. Jennifer, a middle aged mother of two, approaches Kanye, distressed and in need of assistance. Jennifer: (fidgeting with her grocery bag) Excuse me? Mister Kanye? Where...
    tenente tenente 31-35, M 1 Response Aug 13, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    okay so I dream EVERY night & remember all of my dreams really vividly. I don't know why though. :/ it scares me sometimes & I won't go to sleep until I absoulutely have to bc I...
    ashleygrierrr ashleygrierrr 13-15, F 1 Response Jun 30

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    I believe that people become adults when they realize that they'll have to work for what they want and need.
    GoodLyndi GoodLyndi 41-45 1 Response Jul 16

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    You are walking in the park at dusk and you see this,what would you do? https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xfa1/t1.0-9/p480x480/525377_555963044444628_46714772_n.jpg...
    berangere berangere 66-70, F 6 Responses Jul 6

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    Priceless.
    berangere berangere 66-70, F 1 Response Jul 15

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    If you make me laugh there's a huge chance I will love you forever like for real lmaoooooo 😂😂😂-ari
    zakiana15 zakiana15 13-15, F 2 Responses Jun 30

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    Lol. Lmao. But. Not mad at me. Lol Lmao.
    converted converted 46-50, M Jul 16

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    To make it on this planet you have to have a sense of humor. You need to be able to laugh at yourself as well. Women demand it. I can honestly say I have laughed my way into women...
    smokethis smokethis 51-55, M 2 hrs ago

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    I like to laugh. I have a sense of humor and I really admire people that can laugh. It's so much fun to talk to someone that can make me smile or laugh even when I don't want to...
    Olivia2014 Olivia2014 31-35, F 8 Responses Jul 7

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    I know no one is perfect but not everyone should have kids. Doctors and laws should get into parents' IQ, whether they have common sense or not, habits, and salary. Gosh! If one...
    destinii3 destinii3 26-30, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    When I was about 13 I'd have very slight itching when I got out of the shower and my whole family thought it was bizarre and because I didn't clean the shower properly... Which I...
    ChloeMaay96 ChloeMaay96 18-21, F 1 Response 9 hrs ago

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    Sometimes guys just cant get what others women can, like little nuances that only occur between a woman and her friend. I mean, its not like you can eyeball a hot guy and then tell...
    Lov3intheasylum Lov3intheasylum 31-35, F 18 hrs ago

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    Anyone who doesn't have a weird sense of humour, GOBILYE (Get Out Before I Lick Your Elbow)
    HappensForAReason HappensForAReason 13-15, M 1 Response Jun 30

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    My Mom's Death I remember it clearly as though it happened yesterday. She was an amazing woman. Very independent yet not. My dad really held her together. I remember the...
    PoetryNEmotion PoetryNEmotion 51-55, F 3 Responses Jul 5

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    Believe it or not, I do have a good sense of humour. Life problems apart, and let's face it, we all have them to a greater or lesser extent, I love a good laugh and sharing a bit...
    SlowWhispa SlowWhispa 36-40, F Jul 9

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    Well my life because I was born and raised in a country said to be "better" than Canada but I dont see how it is I mean Hong Kong has nothing fun in it, people are rude, gross and...
    Miserablechildhood Miserablechildhood 13-15, M 20 hrs ago

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    My childhood friend, mark, has always had this muscle condition which prevents him from walking straight. He doesn't limp, just walks differently. It is very noticeable. He has had...
    tamnialler tamnialler 13-15, F 3 Responses Jul 2

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    I remember the first time I tried it — I was only a kid of fifteen. And even though she was much younger than me, She was far more composed and serene. It was out in the barn, I...
    AverageSized AverageSized 46-50, M 1 Response Jul 22

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    Ed Zachary A woman was very distraught at the fact that she had not had a date or any sex in quite some time. She was afraid she might have something wrong with her, so she...
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    Does anyone else ever get this weird feeling when they wake up from a dream almost like you're being pulled out from underwater really fast? It's difficult to describe. Like being...
    PinkMellow PinkMellow 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 5

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    I have really disturbing dreams sometimes. Not nightmares per say, but strange enough that they wake me up. Last night's was weird, but not disturbing luckily. I was trying to fill...
    Env06 Env06 22-25, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    My life has been roller coaster in every sense. Coming from middle class family in India, I was diagnosed for Acute lymphoblastic leukemia (ALL) at 14 yrs which took me 5 months of...
    smilealllife smilealllife 31-35, M 18 hrs ago

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    Right now I'm wearing some basketball shorts, and these ones have pockets. It's funny because in the pockets are money's. The money's are funny because the money's are coins. The...
    MyNameMeansLight MyNameMeansLight 16-17, F 4 Responses 14 hrs ago

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    Image, have a good laugh and a super day
    MiriamL MiriamL 22-25 4 hrs ago

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    Three rather deaf friends meet on the street. “Windy, isn’t it? Said one. “No, it’s Thursday,” said the second. “So am I,” said the third. “Let’s go and have a...
    boxersoff4u boxersoff4u 51-55, M 16 hrs ago

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    Sometimes I respond to ppls Experiences with totally random stream of thought answers. I don't know why I do it, except that I am forever exercising my funny bone and likely do it...
    Tasha15Girl Tasha15Girl 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 3

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    I Reblog Bands, Art, Tattoos, Words, Scenery, Sadness, Anything Relatable, Bizarre, Things Colorful, Anime, Poems, Gifs, Black and White Word Pictures and Horror. http...
    darkangellights darkangellights 18-21, F Jul 14

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    Last night I dreamt that I was in a mall with a group of people, but mainly some unnamed girl (she has been a common character lately). The dream was a little odd, but nothing too...
    purposebuilt purposebuilt 22-25, M 1 Response Jul 15

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