I Have a Fear of Physical Intimacy

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 125 People

    Fear Of Physical Intimacy

    its very stress full but I'm terrified of physical intimacy even though i can care for someone very much. its happened with all my girlfriends and they leave or cheat on me it seems around the 3 month mark because i think they feel i don't care for them or am attracted or better...
    nonshur nonshur
    22-25, M
    2 Responses Jan 29, 2012

    Really Uncomfortable

    I'm even a bit uncomfortable with hugs.  When to hug, for how long, how hard.  And snuggling or cuddling is pretty much out of the question, especially with people I know want to take it further.  I'm uncomfortable with physical contact, and am afraid of real...
    boudica1224 boudica1224
    22-25, F
    3 Responses Jan 15, 2009

    Mother May I?

    I have a boyfriend who tries to cuddle with me but I get so awkward and nervous. My family is not into the "lovey-dovey stuff" and hugging and expressing any form of affection, so I'm just not used to it. I remember when I was younger I would have to ask permission to hug or (if...
    Lamchops Lamchops
    18-21, F
    Mar 24, 2009

    No One Touches Me.

    The furthest I've ever gone is just kissing. I hate it. I do not let anyone's hands wander. I find it irritating. If it means that I have to be alone for the rest of my life, then so be it. I have friend/family. I don't need a boyfriend, or husband. I do wish that I could have...
    Sabrina1991 Sabrina1991
    3 Responses Dec 29, 2012

    Body Vs. Mind Vs. Inner Values

    This inner problem has taken it's tole on most of my relationships. I was raped right after graduating by my fiancé because I believe sex is for marriage even though I have fallen into my inner temptations a couple times. He was abusive and let every one know I was "his". This...
    Pianonut814 Pianonut814
    1 Response Oct 2, 2011

    Chained To Myself

     They say it's a subconscious defense mechanism from your child hood. While I admit I didn't have the ideal child hood, life's fine outside of the wall now, and I want out. Problem is, it seems this wall isn't coming down. I can dream all I want, but it seems my fear of...
    Potz4Prez Potz4Prez
    18-21, M
    1 Response Nov 28, 2009

    Intimacy Problems... Help!!!

    If anyone could help at all I would seriously appreciate it. I feel so lost and down and don't know what to do next. . When I was younger my sister was sexually abused by my dad, however I have now started having flashbacks also. Also when I was 11 one of my boyfriends tried to...
    2 Responses Jan 22, 2013


    I love it..........snuggling, but it always leads to the other person wanting sex, it is just annoying so I avoid intimacy
    Zeeksyte Zeeksyte
    41-45, F
    5 Responses Jan 1, 2009

    Enough Is Enough

    So I have a fear of physical intimacy... The guys I'm with is fantastic. We get along so well, like all the sames thinks, have even briefly brought up the subject of moving in together once we're both done with college. We've known each other for over nine years and have been...
    TheAlternetive TheAlternetive
    18-21, F
    Sep 10, 2012

    I'm actually in a relationship with someone

    who is appears to be fearful of physical intimacy. Although he really won't acknowledge it. I feel like he loves and cares about me- but he is blind to my need for him to be intimate and sexual with me. I'm trying to understand him- while also deal with my own frustration at...
    marengo10 marengo10
    51-55, M
    2 Responses Jun 30, 2015

    I Just Don't Know What To Do...

    I have a very wonderful, patient, kind, loving and understanding boyfriend, whom I've been with for a little over 7 years.  Throughtout the last few yrs, we have our ups and downs with our sex life... in the last 4 or 5 months, it's not even been on my radar to have sex or...
    lola1384 lola1384
    26-30, F
    Apr 22, 2010

    What's Next..

    Starting to feel the loneliness and emptiness. Physical intimacy is fighting to me and I would like to start dating, but how do you tell someone you have never gone beyond the first kiss and have gotten physically ill from kissing. The fear is eating me up and I don't know how to...
    windfield36 windfield36
    36-40, F
    1 Response Apr 25, 2011

    Fear Of Failure

    I have a fear of intimacy. It's lots of tings- But fear of failure is the in the forefront as of late. Maybe I was to have s*x again, but I feel like I don't even know how to any more. It used to be so easy... So natural... Almost mindless- Just passion. and urges Now...
    theFROZENmango theFROZENmango
    Aug 27, 2012

    I'm 22, never had a boyfriend,

    i just don't feel the need of intimacy and i don't want to have sex, so theres no point in dating, but i do want to feel love i guess i just hope to find someone like me so i wouldn't have to be touched and that he won't expect anything from me
    noah223 noah223
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jul 26, 2014

    Can't Have a Real Relationship

    It's a really annoying fear that I wish would go away.  I'm at a point in my life where being afraid of being intimate physically is getting in the way of having a real relationship.  It's the reason I don't go on more than one date, I don't ask people out on dates, and...
    boudica1224 boudica1224
    22-25, F
    1 Response Oct 29, 2008

    Uncomfortable With Physical Contact

    I have always needed my own space, even I was a small child I was uncomfortable with too much hugging.  I don’t know why but I feel resistance towards my mum, like hugging her just feels unnatural and I can remember this from an early age.  It’s like I was...
    eelarc eelarc
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Feb 23, 2010

    I Find It Hard To Be Touched

    i dont like being touched a lot... its because I am often being forced into sexual things with the people I am not really wanting to I hate that so much ... I haven't been in a physical thing in ages and the last person I hugged was a friend on her birthday it felt yukky...
    czaristacrystals czaristacrystals
    36-40, F
    Mar 16, 2011

    I got married in 1995.

    I had my daughter in 1996,and my son in 1998.my health was not in good shape and got worse in 2003.I haven't had a physical contact relationship with my husband since my son was born. I have a fear of physical intimacy, yet i am craving the least bit of contact like a hug from...
    Chelsea1973 Chelsea1973
    41-45, F
    Nov 15, 2015

    I Wouldn't Call It a Fear.

    I wouldn't say I have a fear of physical intimacy but I do admit that I have never felt comfortable with being physically intimate on any level.  I have always had physical space issues that make physical intimacy impossible.  My discomfort with physical intimacy...
    wordsmith85 wordsmith85
    22-25, M
    2 Responses Dec 31, 2008

    But That Doesn'T Stop Me From Wanting It.

    I desperately want it. I'm also scared of it.
    Rennn Rennn
    22-25, M
    Feb 8, 2013

    This is extremely weird

    and contradictory. I had a bf 2 yrs ago and we got too intimate than I expected. I did not really care that much at that point because I really liked someone else, even though this crush proved to be quite a jerk. Long short story, now I am stuck with this physical desire to...
    WitheredMind WitheredMind
    18-21, F
    1 Response Nov 14, 2015

    I'm Scared To Do Anything More Than Kissing.

     I love my boyfriend, he is amazing, he makes me laugh,  we have the same likes and dislikes, he is my soulmate and i am his, he lights up my day, but i can't get physical with him, i'm terrified of physical intimacy, we kiss and hold hands and cuddle and sleep in the...
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Oct 18, 2009

    21 still a virgin and I don't see it changing

    anytime soon. I get asked out and hit on by a lot of guys but I got so tired of turning ppl down that I just try my best to look unapproachable. don't get me wrong I crave physical intimacy but that craving can quickly be fed by hugging a friend. emotional intimacy is scary to...
    recoveryqueenYO recoveryqueenYO
    22-25, F
    1 Response Nov 4, 2015


    Whenever I would ever get to that point of any physical intimacy it would be a near panic attack and then I would shut down. I am a socially awkward person already and this made things more difficult as it takes me a long time to warm up to people only to freeze at the moment of...
    Baron10 Baron10
    31-35, M
    May 9, 2009

    Fear Of Intimacy Hold Me From Life

    I am 36 years old and I have never had a physical relationship, I cannot get past kissing and I have avoided dating for the last few years with caring for sick parents it was easy. Now I am alone and cannot take the next step in dating and I have in the past gotten physical ill...
    windfield36 windfield36
    36-40, F
    1 Response Feb 21, 2011

    A Fear Of Physical Intimacy...

    It's honestly scary! It all started with a piece of a fan-fiction I read. Yes, I am serious. It described a lovely scene, in which one of the characters was described as giving close-mouthed kisses to the other, the sort you'd give to a relative or someone of that kind of...
    stupidIvan stupidIvan
    18-21, M
    2 Responses Apr 4, 2012

    Holding Hands & Having Sex

    Those two things are still very odd for me. I get uncomfortable when asked to do that. I don't like sweaty palms and sex is still very ackward and weird to me. I don't think all of this is going to be a permanent issue. Maybe an "exception" will show up one day. It will take a...
    LovelessDeluxe LovelessDeluxe
    2 Responses Jul 12, 2011


    The other day my friend said to me "I always want to give you a hug but I know you dont like it." I had no idea she noticed....Then the other night this guy who I slept with when I was drunk and didnt remember it tried to hold my hand...IN PUBLIC!! Come on!! It lasted roughly 30...
    walkingon walkingon
    Aug 14, 2012

    I Dont My Partner Does, What Can I Do

    I am in a 'relationship thing' 3 months about...we get along great, i adore him...everyone thinks were perfect together...no body knows that I can't get him to want to touch me... I am a very sexual person, and love the intimacy, love when a man can't keep his hands off me in...
    davincifabulous davincifabulous
    26-30, F
    1 Response Oct 30, 2011
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