I Have a Monster

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 121 People

    The Demon I Call My Friend

    They live within me, craving all the bad things. They want hate so I hate others. They want pain, so I hurt others to watch their tears. They want anger so I lash out. They want blood so I slit my wrists. They want perfection so I shove my fingers down my throat. They want my...
    Veronica4 Veronica4
    18-21, F
    1 Response May 31, 2011

    Shakespeare's Shadow

    This time, I won't be pushing you away I have tried that countless times and felt the dismay Pausing to think, perhaps you have something to say Other than turning my sparkles into mere grey. Pleasing yourself, you come and you go Only because there is little that I know But...
    Sylphy Sylphy
    41-45, F
    3 Responses Mar 9, 2012

    We've All Got Monsters...

    Some are big. Some are small. Some are so loud you can't ignore them and some are shy little things that hide away, whispering. We've all got monsters. Monsters like to hide away in places you don't want to go, the dark alleys of your heart and mind where the secrets are...
    Yoru Yoru
    18-21
    1 Response Nov 15, 2011

    The Death of Peace

    I have a Monster. I suspect it rages in the heart of every man. I have taken mine and locked it deep, chained in the darkest of places in the hope that it does not tread on a spirit that once desired to be only gentle, caring and giving; loving. But as the years go by, and the...
    TheTardyDodo TheTardyDodo
    31-35, M
    19 Responses Jul 17, 2007

    Today I Died...

      Today I died, just gave up hope. I jumped, fired, sliced, swallowed whatever I needed to escape… and yet I’m here, breathing, barely functioning, a shadow of myself. Today I died, I gave control to the monster… to puppet as he chooses, taking me from...
    mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality
    36-40, F
    6 Responses Jul 17, 2007

    Norm

    Physical wounds have healed, emotional not so much. This deep blackness that is within absorbs all that is good. I have never known another way of living and now I am supposed to find a way to be "normal" or the new normal. I have no happy place within my soul, I have searched...
    melz1108 melz1108
    26-30, F
    Jan 23, 2011

    I Love Monsters

    but they are in extinction.
    Thought1 Thought1
    22-25
    3 Responses Jun 25, 2009

    I Am the Monster Inside

    My brain tells me to do bad things. It tells me to hurt people, to hurt the people who hurt me. It tells me I'll feel better after I punish them. My brain tells me to hurt people who have never hurt me, to punish them for what they might do one day. It tells me I'll be saving...
    eyes eyes
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Oct 14, 2007

    Hi Honey I'm Home... Did Ya Miss Me?

    He says casually as he strolls into my head. "I'm back and here to take over... life's been to easy for you the past few days and I wanted to come stir things up a bit." I try to push him out, I fight him with all my might. Maybe if I take another pill it will help...
    mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality
    36-40, F
    4 Responses Sep 11, 2007

    Under My Bed!

    I have a monster it lives under my bed I don't let it out often because he eats people I have to keep him well hidden or friends will  Run in fear I have a monster under my bed I need him and he needs me  We share the same thoughts  And the desire to eat people I have a...
    cutout cutout
    26-30
    5 Responses Oct 15, 2011

    Excess

    I have a monster inside.  It desires terrible things.  When I am alone, or with people, it is asleep, or waiting.  I'm not sure.  It only gets to come out when I've drank too much or am under some substance's influence. It wants me to hurt people...
    flirtswithdisaster flirtswithdisaster
    26-30, M
    11 Responses Aug 18, 2007

    Monstrous Passion

    I am a gentleman through and through but what you don't see in the raging inferno of carefully repressed passion and a blazing hot intense sexuality that could give the sun a run for it's money. That is my monster, my passion - no not the trouserpython but what lies behind it. I...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    4 Responses Dec 16, 2009

    Tools

    She goes through life never knowing left from right love from hate warmth from cold. She is expected to a productive member of society, With no one ever telling her how. Never giving her the tools to know the differenences in feelings and how to feel more than one at a...
    melz1108 melz1108
    26-30, F
    Jan 23, 2011

    My Monster

    Some days ( like todays ) I have victory's , some days I dont. I will win the battle.
    tootiemcfruity tootiemcfruity
    18-21, F
    Dec 31, 2011

    My Monster

    Not really. He's never truly dead. But all the same he is indeed a monster. I never knew he would sneak up on me like he had. I actually for a while thought my life was normal for a bit. Before he came and reminded me of everything that went wrong. Reminded me of what a freak I...
    Naelextip Naelextip
    18-21, F
    1 Response Jun 12, 2013

    Still Hunting....

    Let me say that I don't actually have a monster...yet.But I have been hot on the trail of one for a couple of years now.It lives in the southeast and has been seen by reliable witnesses.This monster beast is five feet tall and covered with fur.It travels with a huge racoon. Stop...
    PeaceOnEarth PeaceOnEarth
    46-50, F
    8 Responses Nov 5, 2007

    Shrek...

    That one line...the one where he says "ogres are like onions" Does that make me an onion? 'Cuz I really have to empathize with that statement. So many pieces of me spread across so many layers, peeling away in some places and whole in others. And my deepest layers...those are...
    GoldLikeAutumn GoldLikeAutumn
    13-15
    Nov 15, 2011

    Try Again

    I call on the demon from down below Please come up and take my soul It is no longer needed for no one else cares I was in need of love but no one would share I call on the spirit please hear my cries I am tired of living surrounded by lies I need to be happy I need to be...
    mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality
    36-40, F
    5 Responses Sep 8, 2007

    But How?

    Dieing with-in my soul is so painful to watch Knowing I need to live, but how? So much was destroyed, so much was taken How do we go on, how do we move on It is said the past is the past, so leave it there. Okay, tell me how? I want to live a life. I look around a see every-ones...
    melz1108 melz1108
    26-30, F
    Feb 3, 2011

    My Monster

    My monster is not abusive nor is it passion. It is simply that i tear away at myself i love pain. Cuts, gashes, bits anything it brings me to my knees it is the pain that sets me off and lets it go. If you understand what a Sado-masochist is then you understand me
    PeopleTreatMeLikeCrap PeopleTreatMeLikeCrap
    22-25, M
    2 Responses Jan 21, 2010

    Sophisticated Hate

    Sophisticated conversations held around the dinner table Similar to a royal family. Only speaking of what is wrong with everyone else and never why. Especially never what could be wrong with your self. Only what you have done, and how you can never act that way, "it is not lady...
    melz1108 melz1108
    26-30, F
    Dec 31, 2010

    A Wrinkle In Time

    The layers surround her little world a world of pain pain penetrating her layer by layer penetrating her innocence innocence never known by her little world Known as life to her life that she has always struggled to love always feeling cheated feeling within layers of her despair...
    melz1108 melz1108
    26-30, F
    Nov 18, 2010

    My Very Own Monster

    I have a monster that goes and comes. I never see it coming and it makes me feel numb. It taunts me and teases, telling me Im not good enough, some days it's easy with me and some, it's pretty rough. I fight my monster every time it arrives, it cuts me with it's imaginary...
    soulrunher soulrunher
    41-45, F
    2 Responses Jan 20, 2013

    My Monster

    you know it's there it haunts you in your dreams turning everything good into horrible directions it makes you feel awful things about yourself, your friends, your life, everything you know it's there when everything is good you don't relax because you know it's there it...
    daydreamer27 daydreamer27
    18-21, F
    May 21, 2013

    My Monster

      My monster is sometimes my friend… adding to my creativity, allowing me to function days on end with little to no sleep, giving me the power to stand up for what I believe and voice my opinion, allowing me to live life the way it should be lived, with joy, hope...
    mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality
    36-40, F
    7 Responses Jul 17, 2007

    Clutter Brain

    my clutter brain I say my, comatose state of mine squeak, squeak, squeak fining my words to speak nothing but cries, cries of many trying to escape a child born not knowing grow, my sweets, grow only to be smashed by hate grow, my friend, grow only to be buried by lies...
    melz1108 melz1108
    26-30, F
    Jan 31, 2011

    I'm Sure I Have Many.

    They only come out on nights like tonight... but when they show up, it's bad.  It's always bad.  Tonight, it's particularly awful.  Nights like this, there is no peace, only torment.
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    1 Response Nov 2, 2008

    My Monster

    My "Monster" is the family cat. His real name is Cisco but I call him "Crisco" because he has cream colored yellowish tipped hair and is a little ball of blubber from eating the dog's food. His favorite spot is a cavity underneath the last stair in ...
    keepingwarm keepingwarm
    31-35
    1 Response Jan 4, 2008

    Beast of Black Pike

    Oh my god...it is true,it is all true. Travels upright,175 pounds,vocalizes with screams & mutterings...has a face that has human like qualities with intelligence in it's eyes. ...travels with the biggest racoon anyone has ever seen! First you see the racoon and then the...
    PeaceOnEarth PeaceOnEarth
    46-50, F
    4 Responses Jun 16, 2008

    Awakening Creature

    By day, my life is peaceful & full of serenity. But, by night, the creature is released from its prison & takes over. In the morning, the taste of blood runs around my mouth but don't where it came from. The sun is what the creature fears & comes out when the moon is shown. The...
    HikariNoSukai HikariNoSukai
    16-17, F
    Jul 11, 2010

    Oh Yes!! The Monster Inside!!

    constantly telling me im not good enough, and im a lowlife and a failure!!! time for me to try and fight the monster inside i think!!!
    cowshed123 cowshed123
    36-40, M
    1 Response Oct 24, 2010

    Shock

    My husband of 27years ago walked out on me 5 weeks ago while I was at work came home to a noteWe had been having problems over the last two years then recently he had an operation for cancer I thought it would bring us closer,but once he came right he was gone
    Soffeesue Soffeesue
    61-65
    1 Response Sep 2, 2011

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    I wonder when I observe humans interact what a monster I must be that people are dismissive and defensive in person but normal to me online. No my tone doesn't change. Don't blame...
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    So today I have the family over my house. I go into my room to get my phone charger. I open the door and I see my brother naked changing his clothes. I couldn't help but notice his...
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    I loved him. But I hated him once. Now I love him again. What if that event did not happen? What if he were always the same kind father? Would I have become who I am today? I don...
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    Yeah, sure, I've told but lots of men that I am beautiful. But that has only been in my adult years. When I was younger, everyone treated me like an ugly monster. Like I would...
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