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I Have a Monster

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 123 People

    Shakespeare's Shadow

    This time, I won't be pushing you away I have tried that countless times and felt the dismay Pausing to think, perhaps you have something to say Other than turning my sparkles into mere grey. Pleasing yourself, you come and you go Only because there is little that I know But...
    Sylphy Sylphy 41-45, F 3 Responses Mar 9, 2012

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    My Monster

    My "Monster" is the family cat. His real name is Cisco but I call him "Crisco" because he has cream colored yellowish tipped hair and is a little ball of blubber from eating the dog's food. His favorite spot is a cavity underneath the last stair in ...
    keepingwarm keepingwarm 31-35 1 Response Jan 4, 2008

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    Awakening Creature

    By day, my life is peaceful & full of serenity. But, by night, the creature is released from its prison & takes over. In the morning, the taste of blood runs around my mouth but don't where it came from. The sun is what the creature fears & comes out when the moon is shown. The...
    HikariNoSukai HikariNoSukai 16-17, F Jul 11, 2010

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    Clutter Brain

    my clutter brain I say my, comatose state of mine squeak, squeak, squeak fining my words to speak nothing but cries, cries of many trying to escape a child born not knowing grow, my sweets, grow only to be smashed by hate grow, my friend, grow only to be buried by lies...
    melz1108 melz1108 26-30, F Jan 31, 2011

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    Try Again

    I call on the demon from down below Please come up and take my soul It is no longer needed for no one else cares I was in need of love but no one would share I call on the spirit please hear my cries I am tired of living surrounded by lies I need to be happy I need to be...
    mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality 36-40, F 5 Responses Sep 8, 2007

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    Beast of Black Pike

    Oh my god...it is true,it is all true. Travels upright,175 pounds,vocalizes with screams & mutterings...has a face that has human like qualities with intelligence in it's eyes. ...travels with the biggest racoon anyone has ever seen! First you see the racoon and then the...
    PeaceOnEarth PeaceOnEarth 46-50, F 4 Responses Jun 16, 2008

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    My Very Own Monster

    I have a monster that goes and comes. I never see it coming and it makes me feel numb. It taunts me and teases, telling me Im not good enough, some days it's easy with me and some, it's pretty rough. I fight my monster every time it arrives, it cuts me with it's imaginary...
    soulrunher soulrunher 41-45, F 2 Responses Jan 20, 2013

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    But How?

    Dieing with-in my soul is so painful to watch Knowing I need to live, but how? So much was destroyed, so much was taken How do we go on, how do we move on It is said the past is the past, so leave it there. Okay, tell me how? I want to live a life. I look around a see every-ones...
    melz1108 melz1108 26-30, F Feb 3, 2011

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    Monstrous Passion

    I am a gentleman through and through but what you don't see in the raging inferno of carefully repressed passion and a blazing hot intense sexuality that could give the sun a run for it's money. That is my monster, my passion - no not the trouserpython but what lies behind it. I...
    deleted deleted 26-30 6 Responses Dec 16, 2009

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    Oh Yes!! The Monster Inside!!

    constantly telling me im not good enough, and im a lowlife and a failure!!! time for me to try and fight the monster inside i think!!!
    cowshed123 cowshed123 31-35, M 1 Response Oct 24, 2010

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    The Demon I Call My Friend

    They live within me, craving all the bad things. They want hate so I hate others. They want pain, so I hurt others to watch their tears. They want anger so I lash out. They want blood so I slit my wrists. They want perfection so I shove my fingers down my throat. They want my...
    Veronica4 Veronica4 18-21, F 1 Response May 31, 2011

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    Hi Honey I'm Home... Did Ya Miss Me?

    He says casually as he strolls into my head. "I'm back and here to take over... life's been to easy for you the past few days and I wanted to come stir things up a bit." I try to push him out, I fight him with all my might. Maybe if I take another pill it will help...
    mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality 36-40, F 4 Responses Sep 11, 2007

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    Shock

    My husband of 27years ago walked out on me 5 weeks ago while I was at work came home to a noteWe had been having problems over the last two years then recently he had an operation for cancer I thought it would bring us closer,but once he came right he was gone
    Soffeesue Soffeesue 61-65 1 Response Sep 2, 2011

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    My Monster

    you know it's there it haunts you in your dreams turning everything good into horrible directions it makes you feel awful things about yourself, your friends, your life, everything you know it's there when everything is good you don't relax because you know it's there it...
    daydreamer27 daydreamer27 16-17, F May 21, 2013

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    Norm

    Physical wounds have healed, emotional not so much. This deep blackness that is within absorbs all that is good. I have never known another way of living and now I am supposed to find a way to be "normal" or the new normal. I have no happy place within my soul, I have searched...
    melz1108 melz1108 26-30, F Jan 23, 2011

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    We've All Got Monsters...

    Some are big. Some are small. Some are so loud you can't ignore them and some are shy little things that hide away, whispering. We've all got monsters. Monsters like to hide away in places you don't want to go, the dark alleys of your heart and mind where the secrets are...
    Yoru Yoru 18-21 1 Response Nov 15, 2011

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    I'm Sure I Have Many.

    They only come out on nights like tonight... but when they show up, it's bad.  It's always bad.  Tonight, it's particularly awful.  Nights like this, there is no peace, only torment.
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Nov 2, 2008

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    My Monster

    Some days ( like todays ) I have victory's , some days I dont. I will win the battle.
    tootiemcfruity tootiemcfruity 18-21, F Dec 31, 2011

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    Still Hunting....

    Let me say that I don't actually have a monster...yet.But I have been hot on the trail of one for a couple of years now.It lives in the southeast and has been seen by reliable witnesses.This monster beast is five feet tall and covered with fur.It travels with a huge racoon. Stop...
    PeaceOnEarth PeaceOnEarth 46-50, F 8 Responses Nov 5, 2007

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    Tools

    She goes through life never knowing left from right love from hate warmth from cold. She is expected to a productive member of society, With no one ever telling her how. Never giving her the tools to know the differenences in feelings and how to feel more than one at a...
    melz1108 melz1108 26-30, F Jan 23, 2011

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    A Wrinkle In Time

    The layers surround her little world a world of pain pain penetrating her layer by layer penetrating her innocence innocence never known by her little world Known as life to her life that she has always struggled to love always feeling cheated feeling within layers of her despair...
    melz1108 melz1108 26-30, F Nov 18, 2010

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    My Monster

    My monster is not abusive nor is it passion. It is simply that i tear away at myself i love pain. Cuts, gashes, bits anything it brings me to my knees it is the pain that sets me off and lets it go. If you understand what a Sado-masochist is then you understand me
    PeopleTreatMeLikeCrap PeopleTreatMeLikeCrap 22-25, M 2 Responses Jan 21, 2010

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    My Monster

    Not really. He's never truly dead. But all the same he is indeed a monster. I never knew he would sneak up on me like he had. I actually for a while thought my life was normal for a bit. Before he came and reminded me of everything that went wrong. Reminded me of what a freak I...
    Naelextip Naelextip 18-21, F Jun 12, 2013

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    Today I Died...

      Today I died, just gave up hope. I jumped, fired, sliced, swallowed whatever I needed to escape… and yet I’m here, breathing, barely functioning, a shadow of myself. Today I died, I gave control to the monster… to puppet as he chooses, taking me from...
    mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality 36-40, F 6 Responses Jul 17, 2007

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    Sophisticated Hate

    Sophisticated conversations held around the dinner table Similar to a royal family. Only speaking of what is wrong with everyone else and never why. Especially never what could be wrong with your self. Only what you have done, and how you can never act that way, "it is not lady...
    melz1108 melz1108 26-30, F Dec 31, 2010

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    Excess

    I have a monster inside.  It desires terrible things.  When I am alone, or with people, it is asleep, or waiting.  I'm not sure.  It only gets to come out when I've drank too much or am under some substance's influence. It wants me to hurt people...
    flirtswithdisaster flirtswithdisaster 26-30, M 11 Responses Aug 18, 2007

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    Under My Bed!

    I have a monster it lives under my bed I don't let it out often because he eats people I have to keep him well hidden or friends will  Run in fear I have a monster under my bed I need him and he needs me  We share the same thoughts  And the desire to eat people I have a...
    cutout cutout 26-30 5 Responses Oct 15, 2011

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    My Monster

      My monster is sometimes my friend… adding to my creativity, allowing me to function days on end with little to no sleep, giving me the power to stand up for what I believe and voice my opinion, allowing me to live life the way it should be lived, with joy, hope...
    mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality 36-40, F 7 Responses Jul 17, 2007

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    Shrek...

    That one line...the one where he says "ogres are like onions" Does that make me an onion? 'Cuz I really have to empathize with that statement. So many pieces of me spread across so many layers, peeling away in some places and whole in others. And my deepest layers...those are...
    GoldLikeAutumn GoldLikeAutumn 13-15 Nov 15, 2011

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    The Death of Peace

    I have a Monster. I suspect it rages in the heart of every man. I have taken mine and locked it deep, chained in the darkest of places in the hope that it does not tread on a spirit that once desired to be only gentle, caring and giving; loving. But as the years go by, and the...
    TheTardyDodo TheTardyDodo 31-35, M 19 Responses Jul 17, 2007

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    I Am the Monster Inside

    My brain tells me to do bad things. It tells me to hurt people, to hurt the people who hurt me. It tells me I'll feel better after I punish them. My brain tells me to hurt people who have never hurt me, to punish them for what they might do one day. It tells me I'll be saving...
    eyes eyes 31-35, F 2 Responses Oct 14, 2007

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    I Love Monsters

    but they are in extinction.
    Thought1 Thought1 22-25 3 Responses Jun 25, 2009

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    Related Experiences

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    SRB1993 SRB1993 22-25, M 22 mins ago

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    Life is rarely what we expect it to be, and in the span of a year I went from having almost everything I ever wanted and being well on my way to reaching several of my life goals...
    ladydavia ladydavia 26-30, F 52 mins ago

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    As I was watching the movie Fahrenheit 451, it made me think of a few things. I noticed that Montag (the main character) just agreed with whatever his captain said and never...
    moose73630 moose73630 16-17, M 1 Response 3 hrs ago

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    Hi I would like to vent a bit.Yes I have a bipolar spouse.I understand that it takes patients and the right medication.He was diagnosed with bipolar this April.And he is bipolar...
    Fruitypunch15 Fruitypunch15 31-35 2 Responses 3 hrs ago

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    Havent been since 20. In fact my pals call me lethal wussy. Because me will toss yall around But then beg you to stop being dumb. And almost cry. Which makes the tossed...
    Converted Converted 46-50, M 4 hrs ago

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    Monster, how should I feel? Creatures lie here, looking through the windows...
    jiayong jiayong 13-15 4 hrs ago

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    I have an amazing man in my life. We have been together for a year and he has stood by me come hell or high water. I had the good fortune of receiving diagnosis before I met him...
    runawaybunny1 runawaybunny1 22-25, F 15 hrs ago

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    Have noticed we are slaves. Have advised on coping by helping But the wealthy just made bills grow. Everything overpriced stopped help. If they up the price none can help...
    Converted Converted 46-50, M 20 hrs ago

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    The smallest number of children I've ever wanted was 3. I was nine then, and the number has just continued growing. As I got older, I could see myself with a bigger family, and...
    wishingforrecovery wishingforrecovery 16-17, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    I fell in love with a monster, and his name was pain. Id do anything for him, even if it seems insane and though he beats me everyday and calls me names all the time, ill never...
    PorcelainGrenade PorcelainGrenade 13-15, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I have been on EP for the last 5 years. I have been just a member and also part of the behind-the-scenes support team. I've seen so many people come and go from our community. I've...
    hadyourchance hadyourchance 36-40, F 30 Responses 4 days ago

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    would love a woman to share my monster with
    mjlay83 mjlay83 31-35, M 1 Response 4 days ago

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    Humans are monsters. We humans are responsible for quite a lot of evil. Murders, mass murders, genocide, sexism, racism, homophobia, discrimination, torture, abuse of the...
    AceOtana AceOtana 26-30, M 4 days ago

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