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I Have a Mother Who Is Passive Aggressive

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 114 People

    Somethings Not Right With My Mother..

    I'm 22, I live with my mother who is 41 and two brothers who are 18 and 3, the youngest who is by a different father. For as long. Over the last 3 years my mum has started to become emotionally unstable. She can't ask me or my brother to do angrily without screaming at the top of...
    Leafylea Leafylea 22-25 2 Responses Jun 22, 2011

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    Is There Any Hope?

    I grew up thinking everything was my fault, and believing that I was the reason my mother was so unhappy. After all, I was consistently called “spoiled”, ungrateful and selfish because as a child (and like every child) I required care. I’m not speaking of special care, I...
    greenbean11 greenbean11 31-35, F 2 Responses Dec 14, 2011

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    2nd Post..

    I last wrote a post a year ago, right before I was due to move into an apartment with one of my friends. Things were at breaking point with my mother who would constantly ridicule and argue with me, telling me how little I cared about our family and my younger brothers. One year...
    Leafylea Leafylea 22-25 Dec 12, 2012

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    Mommy Dearest

    I'm the eldest child of 4 to a passive aggressive, emotionally unstable woman. I'm 33 years old and left my house as soon as I turned 18 and never went back. We've gone through periods where we don't talk, 99% of the time she's not talking to me because I said something she didn...
    scorpqueen scorpqueen 31-35, F 2 Responses May 14, 2012

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    My Pa Mother In Point-form

    -She never apologizes, whether she's done something as simple as stepped on my foot or said something damning that she can't take back, it doesn't matter. When she does apologize (and I'm sure I could count these moments on one hand) she apologizes with conditions: "I'm sorry...
    jetsgirl17 jetsgirl17 26-30 4 Responses Feb 2, 2012

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    My Mother Is So Aloof And Hostile

    I always dread visiting my mother because I am never sure how she will be.  Will she be chatty or say three words?  Not want to do anything or do everything.  Get annoyed when I ask her something about what she is doing or tell me a little just to shut me up.  All my life my...
    Lemmaloo Lemmaloo 46-50, F 3 Responses May 1, 2012

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    My Mother Is Passive Aggressive And My Sister Fans The Flames

    I am trying not to be annoyed, but the more I think about it the more it bugs me....and makes me want to tell my sister to stop talking to my dd.(16).    My sister and I are not close....as a matter of fact, from my perspective, I do civil just because I have to.  I don't...
    tlstimson tlstimson 46-50 3 Responses Apr 25, 2011

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    The Hatred Is Building...

    For as long as I can remember my mom has been like this but I just assumed everyone's mom acted that way! It wasn't until I moved away to University last year then came back for the summer, I realized her behavior wasn't normal. Now I admit, my PA diagnosis is a 'self-discovered...
    ponylee ponylee 18-21 8 Responses Jul 29, 2010

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    This Is The Last Straw With My Parents

    Any energy or intellect my mother ever had has been completely devoted to her lifetime of getting what she wants by appearing to be a victim. And for a good bit of her life she has cleverly set the stage to make it look like she is MY victim. Every time she comes to visit me or...
    Icannotdothisanymore Icannotdothisanymore 56-60 4 Responses Sep 14, 2011

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    I'm Sick Of Being My Mother's Scapegoat!

    Recently I had a councilor friend, help me understand abit about what's happening with me and my mother.  The whole situation has had me tied up in tangles and knotts for too many years!  I'm the second born of four children.  My mum had us all quite close together.  I grew...
    saliskia39 saliskia39 36-40 1 Response Sep 26, 2011

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    Im Just Venting

    i'm sitting in the house with this *****, and all the feelings ive had building up for 20 years just resurfaced.  she is super judgemental of me and always has been. its like she is jealous. my father is an alcoholic and she has always accepted the role of the victim. they are...
    mnd77 mnd77 31-35 1 Response Jan 26, 2011

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    Holy Crap O_o

    My mother will do ANYTHING to prove her point and make sure we all know she's pissed at us. And if we're in public, or there's people around us, and she can't just yell whatever she feels like, she'll be such a passive aggressive biotch -.- Danget mother, WE GOT YOUR POINT! NO...
    peanlo peanlo 18-21, F 4 Responses Apr 26, 2011

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    Finally Figured It Out!

    At 41, I finally figured out that I have a passive aggressive mother. She is the kind who lies and is insulted and shocked when confronted and hurt that I would dare question her honesty. She hates my wife and kids and of course denies it. We live states apart and in 18 years has...
    Paiwaqet Paiwaqet 41-45 1 Response Feb 19, 2013

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    It took me decades to figure out

    that my mother (and my younger brother for that matter) is extremely passive-aggressive. I simply had no way of knowing when I was younger. By the time I was 12 I was in the dark, but slowly afterward after that age I began to realize that there was something seriously wrong...
    57Canuck 57Canuck 56-60 4 Responses Feb 23

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    The Best Feeling Is Realizing It's Not You

    I for years have dealt with feelings of guilt, questioning my decisions and so forth. It wasn't until recently that I figured things out when my Mother called me just to call me a name then told me to have a nice day. It was/is a subtle way to control and break someone down and...
    DeeDee327 DeeDee327 26-30, F 2 Responses Jun 7, 2012

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    I am trying to heal the emotional scars by

    being raised by a narcissistic passive aggressive mother. She used emotional blackmail any time I stood up to her and also used other family members to straighten me out. She claimed she was always right and saint like and I was being bad and disrespectful by critizing her. I...
    cathy213 cathy213 56-60, F 6 Responses Jan 1

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    The Passive Aggressiveness Continues... With Intensity!!

    Hey! Sorry it took me so long to write this but I had a baby in August and have been VERY busy. SO extremely irritating that mine will act like a nut, spew venom about other people, she is always a victim, and she can be judge and jury on everyone else ESPECIALLY my husbands...
    Irishgirl31 Irishgirl31 31-35, F Nov 1, 2012

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    Passive aggressive...

    ....yes my mother is one of these. How hard is it at times? I have no anger or resentment anymore as I decided to do something about it. Councilling has helped me big time to overcome the resentment I have felt towards her. She use to drive me crazy!!! Low and behold I...
    Laughoutlouds Laughoutlouds 36-40, F 2 Responses Feb 21

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    My Mom Is Passive Agressive

    I love her to death, but when sometimes I try to bring up conflicts and arguments mean things she says , she denies and says i am spreading lies and that i am wrecking her marriage, so i dont know where to go, she finds fault with little things with my boyfriend, like his hair...
    MariaEleanor MariaEleanor 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 6, 2012

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    Try This Craziness On.....

    My mother was diagnosed with a degenerative disease that would lead to severe disability and early death. My entire childhood was spent taking care of her and cleaning/cooking. She was in constant pain, could barely walk, and was always exhausted (from pain, headaches, etc. etc...
    superp5 superp5 36-40, F 2 Responses Sep 5, 2011

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    Just Venting

    My mother is the type of woman that needs to be in control and needed. Even when we were young we had to keep up appearances as if we were the perfect family and at the core...she is the perfect mother. Especially when if comes to her mother. We get along great as long as I...
    Frustratedbeyondbelief72 Frustratedbeyondbelief72 41-45 2 Responses Aug 17, 2013

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    I Feel Better Knowing That I'M Not Alone In This:

    My biggest fear in life is becoming like my mother. My mother verbally and physically abused me and my brothers when we were younger. If you were to ever mention any kind of abuse or even strict parenting to her now, she would of course deny it. The thing that blows me away...
    laweeze85 laweeze85 26-30, F 3 Responses Mar 19, 2013

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    Crazymaking

     OMG, I'm so glad I found this group. I've been feeling like nobody in the world can understand how crazy my mother makes me with her passive aggressiveness.   Once again, she has sabotaged a special day and then refused to take responsibility. I finally wrote her a letter...
    ExperienceKitty ExperienceKitty 56-60, F 4 Responses Jan 20, 2010

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    My Mom, My Husband, And Mother-inlaw All Passive Aggressive....

    I grew up with a passive aggressive mom, I am now grown and married and have long distance realship with my mother which actually helps with relating to her. I  married a great man I love him like crazy. I am over passive person kind of a doormat. I am an easy target for passive...
    amberbradley amberbradley 26-30 Feb 20, 2011

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    I'm Too Old To Put Up With It!

    All my life, I can't think of a single moment where I ever felt any real love for my mother. I was very close to my father before he died (I was only 10) and she always treated me bitterly when he wasn't around. She would always buy me stuff and bribe me to go places with her by...
    mothertrouble mothertrouble 31-35 2 Responses Dec 1, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    I have been around passive aggressive people long enough to recognize the signs when I see them. That being said, it is extra offensive and disappointing to me when I recognize...
    Aimee17 Aimee17 36-40, F 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    It’s very difficult to tell, whether you’ve made an enemy out of a passive aggressive person. They will probably deflect any attempt from you to read their emotional state. It...
    TheGreatLeveler TheGreatLeveler 22-25, M 1 Response Jul 14

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    Passive-aggressive behavior is the indirect expression of hostility, such as through procrastination, sarcasm, stubbornness, sullenness, or deliberate or repeated failure to...
    PandorasDream PandorasDream 36-40, F 2 Responses Jul 11

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    Quoted from http://divorcesupport.about.com/od/isdivorcethesolution/a/passiveaggressivehusband.htm "The passive aggressive husband won’t return his wife’s anger. He will ,get...
    squirrelbounce squirrelbounce 36-40, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    Has anyone ever dealt with a revenge seeking passive aggressive co worker? If so how did you handle it? Thanks
    AquariusLife AquariusLife 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 6

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    Passive aggressive people are constantly thinking of making others feel less of them selfs its like mostly every1 can be victom the best thing ive done was to just ignore people...
    missyluvsmissy4me missyluvsmissy4me 41-45, F Jul 6

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    This morning he stomped into the bedroom where I for once was sleeping in. I've had a bad cold with a cough for 2 weeks so I'm a bit tired. We had spoken about the family coming...
    squirrelbounce squirrelbounce 36-40, F 4 days ago

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    I couldn't put my finger on it for 6 years or so, I thought I was going crazy. He's PA. FINALLY! an answer. But not for him he doesn't believe it he's in denial. But here's my...
    jjflygirl1 jjflygirl1 46-50, F 1 Response Jul 9

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    If someone could please help me with this issue it would be greatly appreciated. he's a retaliation seeking PA, you know the one who NEVER lets tot forget about anything you've...
    AquariusLife AquariusLife 26-30, F Jun 28

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    I'm so upset I need to vent. I have been dealing with manipulation and just trickery from my mom all my life. Last weekend my mother stole from me and I am now trying to piece...
    Kwaters12 Kwaters12 22-25, F 1 Response Jul 11

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    Another day without you mom.. Another night without you. Another dinner gathering without you, the dinner table looks uncomplete and senseless. I miss you like crazy, wish i could...
    Lilac01 Lilac01 18-21, F Jul 4

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    My wife is in her late 30s and has always been morbidly obese. She had always been comfortable with and accepting of her weight. When we got together 16 years ago she was 5'0...
    hsnpman hsnpman 36-40 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    the title of my post is really random because there was no post thats premade that says "i do not like being horny". i know what youre thinking... wtf?! why would someone not enjoy...
    maleable maleable 22-25, F Jul 1

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    My miss my mom so much I just wish could just hear her voice one more time I'm starting to forget what it sounds like.
    kushboy303 kushboy303 18-21, M 2 Responses Jul 4

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    My friends just don't get how much drugs ruined my life and I don't even do them they just don't understand so now I need open ears and an open mind
    greenpotato112 greenpotato112 16-17, M Jul 4

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    So my dad is ditching me for the 4th to go see ONE of his girlfriends. I made plans (the same plans as always) to go Rockcrawling. I can get there myself and don't need his help...
    Adisonmontes Adisonmontes 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 2

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    MY BF IS ALYZ QUIET AROUND ME WE SPEND TO MUCH TIME TOGETHER BUT ALL WE DO SMALL TALK N BE SILENT FOR LONG AND AM GETING BORED COZ HE WANT ME TO DO ALL DE TALKING ALL THE TIME AND...
    hlami1 hlami1 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 10

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    Yesssss. For decades. Some cant help. Most try. Why souwysiedal. Society aint run by them.
    converted converted 46-50, M Jul 14

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    Jusssie punk.is done Lezzie hater 2 is done
    dexrerpunk46 dexrerpunk46 46-50, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    I am an Indian TDH(Tall, Dark, Handsome) guy,inviting you to visit my country. There r so Many unique ancient sites n nature's beauty to explore in INDIA. So many National Park...
    activevirus activevirus 26-30, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    Until things are better financially, my family & I are under the same roof as my mother for now. We had coinciding hard financial times, and at the time, it seemed logical to be...
    LizNiki LizNiki 26-30, F Jun 26

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    She really creeps me out to be honest. There's something crazy to me about those people who go around doing weird, harmful, or wrong things and never hear any real criticisms about...
    fairytalesandspiderwebs fairytalesandspiderwebs 18-21, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    Her latest. She gloms onto a lot of things I do. I have a dog who is at least 15 years old. She used to be quite fond of him. She kept him overnight for me a couple months ago...
    hischelsea hischelsea 46-50, F 1 Response Jul 9

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    It's not easy living with my family. A passive aggressive mother with massive expectations, a psychotic brother who often cracks and goes on rampaged, and a father living at...
    SCLegacy SCLegacy 70+, M 1 Response Jul 8

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    Men like this author are true gemsA Message to Women From a Man: You Are Not "Crazy"You're so sensitive. You're so emotional. You're defensive. You're overreacting. Calm down...
    SpiceZ SpiceZ 56-60, F 2 days ago