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I Have a Sarcastic and Filthy Sense of Humor

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,482 People

    Everytime someone on Food Network says,

    "the taste just exploded in my mouth" I almost pee my pants laughing.
    andie2007 andie2007 41-45, F 4 Responses Apr 18

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    Finally! Welcome Perverts and ********!

    So I'm the one that first added this experience about three months ago and finally someone has posted(thanks naughtygal), and within the last day many more have joined,  I believe that its high time that those of us with senses of humor that can't readily be aired in public...
    themcqueenescape themcqueenescape 18-21, M 2 Responses Apr 23, 2008

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    I always say sarcastic things

    that crack people up but way way way waaaay too often do I make Dirty jokes aha xD It's probably not a good thing though.
    Tabithaaa Tabithaaa 16-17, F 2 Responses Feb 4, 2014

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    I confess. Guilty as charged.

    LOL What slays me is that people look at me and see the image of propriety. And I swear I do not own a stitch of Laura Ashley. It would seem if you are quiet, somewhat clumsy, and prefer not to draw attention to yourself, your children must have been products of divine...
    justNIK justNIK 41-45, F 4 Responses Apr 15

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    Nice A**

    Friend(female): "blah blah blah boys blah blah drama drama gossip drama" Me: *Stares at hot chick* Friend: "What are you staring at now!" Me: "You're hot cousin's a**." Friend: "What?! Why?!" Me: "Because she's turned around so I can't see her boobs." Friend: *Slaps* Me...
    Swordsman101 Swordsman101 18-21, M 1 Response Mar 25, 2013

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    I Find Ignorance Funny.

    I find people who have no ideas of their own and try to pass off something that they have heard or read Hilarious !!!
    mrkay27 mrkay27 46-50, M 1 Response Jun 11, 2013

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    Penis?WTFE

    i lost a managment position for saying penis twice in front of the boss lady.we just started saying (elbow) instead.lol.no one ever knew what we were talking about after that.
    americanbadass americanbadass 31-35, F Aug 15, 2008

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    I Really Do..

    I'm so unlady like..I find racist..sexist..really..any dark humor..just to be hilarious. I always find the dirty pun in things..and..well i'm a pervert..lol
    morbidkittie13 morbidkittie13 22-25, F 2 Responses Sep 26, 2011

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    Moneymaker

    Include sick as well? I have such a strange mind.
    Keelie Keelie 66-70, F Aug 17, 2009

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    GSOH

    I have a very good sense of humor and enjoy all sorts of humor, yes i can be very sarcastic and enjoy filthy humor to. Why just enjoy part of it enjoy it all and you will smile alot every day
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Aug 16, 2009

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    Do These Pants...

    Friend: "Do these pants make my legs look fat?" Me: "Trust me, with a top cut that low, no one is going to be looking at your legs." Friend: *SLAP!* Me: "Worth it." XD
    Swordsman101 Swordsman101 18-21, M 1 Response Nov 8, 2012

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    I Have a Warped Sense of Hu...

    I have a warped sense of humour. Stupid things make me laugh.
    deleted deleted 26-30 5 Responses Aug 14, 2008

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    TheDemonsWithin TheDemonsWithin 13-15, M 3 Responses May 7

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    awhile ago we upgraded our phones

    and the rep was going to move all our pictures and videos to the new phones, he asked if there were anything in there he didn't want us for him to see .. most of my album is filled with cat photos and I really really wanted to say in a joking manner "pics of my hairy p*ssy...
    jbm1984 jbm1984 31-35, F 3 Responses Apr 15

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    Penis?WTFE

    i lost a managment position for saying penis twice in front of the boss lady.we just started saying (elbow) instead.lol.no one ever knew what we were talking about after that.
    americanbadass americanbadass 31-35, F 2 Responses Aug 15, 2008

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    Dead Baby Joke

    How do you fit 50 babies into a bathtub? (blender) How do you get them out? (tostito chips)
    Tippmann07 Tippmann07 22-25, M 2 Responses Feb 10, 2012

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    because I am sarcastic

    and filthy and combined they are even more awsum. Although I am.carefully not to make too many filthy comments here, people are fragile and don't embrace the filth lol
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response May 7

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    Dirty Mind

    Let me start off by saying I have a dirty, filthy sense of humor. In some cases here on EP it has gotten me unfriended and blocked by various members here, who I shall not name. I mean hey, if you can't take a joke then don't be so damn serious. and yes, as I said before, I'm...
    LongLiveRockAndRoll LongLiveRockAndRoll 26-30, M Jan 28, 2012

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    People Say That My Humour Comes From The Gutter

    when i joking around with my friends or at work or whatever, i notice i am the one who tends to take the conversation to a dirtier level. i dont know, i guess it starts in highschool. the school i went to was an all boys school where there was no women and this caused the...
    jonnyronny jonnyronny 18-21, M Apr 12, 2010

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    Sometimes I Should Be Quiet

    My sense of humor can be pretty nasty at times. My daughter has called me on it a few times. She has said she couldn't believe I was her mother. The nerve of that chick!! I laugh at her and tell that I am, so suck it up. I told her it was okay because one day she would...
    grnwd82 grnwd82 51-55, F 2 Responses Aug 17, 2008

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    Because if someone asks

    for a pianist what am I suppose today? Not laugh?
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jan 1

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    Some Of It

    I have a huge spectrum of humor that definitely includes these traits.When I'm around certain people the sarcastic and off -color humor come out a lot more. My close friends don't mind, in fact they find it hilarious so I have no apologies.
    bvb1123 bvb1123 41-45, M Dec 30, 2010

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    When Did This Happen to Me

    Before I met and married my husband I was what could be said a pretty sheltered southern girl.  After being married to my husband who is now out of the Marines for 14 years; I have developed these traits. It isn't always there but I find it can appear at some of the most...
    Grits4life Grits4life 46-50, F 1 Response Aug 15, 2008

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    Neener-Neener

     A bit of backstory: Goldie, Jay and I are really, really good friends. Jay obviously has a thing for Goldie, but her perpetual "taken" status apparently gets in the way. Her current "boyfriend" is not just an incorrigible idiot and tool-facterous...
    zeligocity zeligocity 22-25, M 4 Responses Jan 18, 2009

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    ... But I Choose My Audience.

    Yes, I can be just a teeny-tiny bit sarcastic *rolls eyes*, and I can tell filthy jokes with the best of them.... but I am always careful to choose my audience.  Part of that is for rather obvious reasons-- for instance I am not going to tell an X-rated joke to my...
    Geode Geode 31-35, F 6 Responses Aug 16, 2009

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    Really Awful....

    So I had this co-worker who was constantly bemoaning her circumstances. At first, I was very sympathetic...then I realized most of her problem she creates herself. For example, she went out partying more that 2 days a week; called in 'sick' the day after because she was hungover...
    vinividivici21 vinividivici21 22-25, F 9 Responses Aug 17, 2008

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    More Dead Baby Jokes And Others.....

    What do babies and peanut butter have in common? They both stick to the roof of your mouth. What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? You take your boots off for the trampoline. How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Nail the other hand into...
    Tippmann07 Tippmann07 22-25, M Feb 24, 2012

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    I love being sarcastic cause it cracks people up

    and I have a tendency of being one helluva perv lmao but I love Making people laugh
    AGreenDayToRemember AGreenDayToRemember 16-17, F 1 Response Apr 13, 2014

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    And It's Out of Control....

    Sometimes I don't know when to stop.  And it's usually at work.  I have no idea what others think, but I don't care.  I think I'm funny, my friends think I'm funny.  And it helps all of us get through the day.
    CuriosityKitten CuriosityKitten 31-35, F 6 Responses Aug 14, 2008

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    Sarcasim & That Oh So Naughty Side

    I'm told that Sarcasim is my middle name and my husband does not approve. Funny i haven't changed though, im still the same person - he probably just can't take the heat because he is just not as quick on the draw. as for the filthy sense of humour - well finally it has found a...
    rmac rmac 36-40, F 2 Responses Jun 12, 2008

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    It is fun to see their reactions

    and I'm loveing the laughs that follow
    Unsettledteen Unsettledteen 18-21, F Jul 7, 2014

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    Christians always go on about the time Jesus fed five thousand people with five loaves and two fishes. What about Hitler? He made six million Jews toast.
    doingitreich doingitreich 13-15, F 2 Responses 42 mins ago

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    Autocorrect likes to ruin my already bad attempts to be funny...
    PsychGirl94 PsychGirl94 18-21, F 2 Responses 6 hrs ago

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    There was a kidnapping at that elementary school. But, DONT WORRY!!! The kids woke up. (:
    Firechiic Firechiic 16-17, F 2 Responses 12 hrs ago

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    Friend: I guess you and I have different tastes. :p Me: Nah. I think we both taste the same.😋 Friend: Ohhh, do we now? ;) Me: I was talking about cannibalism.. 😒 Friend...
    PsychGirl94 PsychGirl94 18-21, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    My sense of humor ranges from - corny & weird, to sarcastic & bitter, to dark & morbid, to witty & highbrow, and to Quirky. There's so many kinds of sense of humors out there...
    PsychGirl94 PsychGirl94 18-21, F 11 Responses 1 day ago

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    A dark sense of humor, is a good sense of humor. 😈
    PsychGirl94 PsychGirl94 18-21, F 4 Responses 1 day ago

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    During an interview with an inspector I made a joke that was not even funny and he laughed. I said: ' David told me that if he had a daughter and even if she was 18, he would still...
    DostoevskyForever DostoevskyForever 18-21, F 4 days ago

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    I'm just really sarcastic lol
    Louuann Louuann 13-15, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    I have a great sense of humor. but I'm not loud and obnoxious the way you expect a "funny person" to be so a lot of the time it's lost on people. I've been called "rude" a lot also...
    ZenaMarie ZenaMarie 22-25, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    My smelling sense is incredibly strong as well. Probably why I'm a foodie and love to cook. If I had to give up one of my senses, it certainly would not be that one!😐😏
    Nightwets Nightwets 66-70, M a week ago

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    Some people may not find this funny i wish you all the luck in the world finding your sense of humor !!!!! I want to die like my grandfather peacefully in my sleep not shouting...
    chris7369 chris7369 41-45, M Jun 24

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    I know this guy. He takes thing very serious. I could make a joke he wouldn't laugh. When we talk on the phone, his answers are serious. He doesn't make jokes what so ever. It's...
    lorrena19 lorrena19 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 23

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    Mr. Burns: You're fired! Marge: You can't fire me just because I'm married. I'm gonna sue the pants off of you! Mr. Burns: You don't have to sue me to get my pants off.
    adhane05 adhane05 22-25, M Jun 23

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    So....I was talking to this guy I've never spoken to before and he's like, "I need a real friend, they're so hard to come by in real life, I just need a different perspective on...
    09TiskTisk 09TiskTisk 31-35, F 10 Responses Jun 22