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I Have a Secret Eating Me Alive

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 25 People

    I Can't Believe I'm Saying This

    I haven't told my therapist, my boyfriend or anyone else for 14 years...   I lost my virginity when I was 13 on a sorta/kinda dare. I am so ashamed of it. I hate myself for it. It has the ability to make me feel dirty still. I don't know when or how I'm going to tell my...
    deleted deleted 26-30 10 Responses Mar 8, 2008

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    A Few Actually..

    Probably silly to most, but they get to me.   Ive been eating recently. Not much of a secret but I havent told anyone, does that make sense? Im the girl who doesnt eat, or who purges. Not lately. And Im not proud of my weakness. I slept with Dan. Many times. And I will do...
    Tesse Tesse 18-21, F 5 Responses Mar 8, 2008

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    Cementerygates' Secret

    To tell you the truth... I havent told this to anyone, but... this may have been said before... Butthe truth is that the person from my past, hates who I am now. And she will never like me now. She hates the changes that have so unwelcomely controled my every word and action...
    cementerygates cementerygates 16-18, F 1 Response Mar 8, 2008

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    I Am So Ashame

    I have this secret that I want to dress like punky brester and have my man *** me is that sick or what...LMAO 
    MiseducatedChik MiseducatedChik 26-30, F 2 Responses Mar 8, 2008

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    Related Experiences

    over a year ago i was in a really bad place. i hated myself and everyone around me, i was really depressed and i struggled with bulimia. the bulimia was not that bad and i got...
    littlemeonly littlemeonly 13-15, F 2 Responses Jul 17

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    A few months ago, this would have said I HAD an eating disorder.... I guess I would call it a relapse. I cook a lot, for other people. I love to cook. I just... hate to eat. I...
    xoxomaya93 xoxomaya93 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 7

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    I'm too fat to have an eating disorder they said. People. But I don't eat. And an eating disorder is not something on the outside. Well it may show but it's still all just in your...
    paradiseisbroken paradiseisbroken 13-15, F Jul 10

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    Is it possible to have a eating disorder and have a normal weight? some days I eat hardly anything and their are some days I eat everything in sight but I'm normal weight I lost 15...
    booboo157 booboo157 16-17, F 2 Responses Jul 9

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    I think i have ednos. (Eating disorder not otherwise specified) as you know i have body image priblems. But what you dont know is that im restricting fiod quite alot. But idk i...
    majahi majahi 13-15, F Jul 17

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    I'm still in recovery and I relapsed a few times already about a week ago I think. Sometimes I want to be fully recovered and other times I never want to end my ednos. School is...
    XxbixtchybellaxX XxbixtchybellaxX 13-15, F 1 Response 11 hrs ago

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    I had a letter come through the post yesterday morning from the eating disorder clinic. I have to see them on 24th July. I'm really nervous and really embarrassed about my eating...
    BeautyOfSuffering BeautyOfSuffering 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 12

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    It started when people in my school started calling me fat , so i started to diet but then i started eating less and less , then i completely stopped eating , i started exercising...
    Theworldismyhell Theworldismyhell 18-21, F Jul 6

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    Three years ago I developed an eating disorder. I barely ate anything and lost 10 kg. Then after a while I started bingeing and purging and gained back weight. I really wanted to...
    irisjuuu irisjuuu 18-21, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    I grew up with a mother who has slowly become morbidly obese. All my life she was overweight but as I grew older I began to notice just how overweight she was becoming. My dad is...
    tracy1990 tracy1990 22-25, F 5 days ago

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    I'm not sure if this would truly be considered an eating disorder, but I WANT to gain weight. I eat a lot, have no problem with eating as much as I want but at the same time I have...
    n0ceur n0ceur 18-21, F Jul 7

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    I was a gymnast when I was younger and gymnastics was my life. When I was about 11, I was getting really conscious about my weight and the way I looked. I started skipping meals...
    caribbeanbabe808 caribbeanbabe808 13-15, F Jul 8

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    Stay away from eating disorders and prevent them when you can! They will basically destroy your life, your relationships with friends, love, and family, your body, your mind, YOU...
    starsarediamonds starsarediamonds 13-15, F Jul 7

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    I'm currently blogging about my daily battles with my eating disorder and my other mental health problems such as my borderline personality disorder. I try to update it regularly...
    BeautyOfSuffering BeautyOfSuffering 22-25, F Jul 12

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    I thought I defeated my eating disorder, i used to starve until I've lost about 10 kg I mean I'm trying to eat better, but today I ate something different from what I eat everyday...
    brzdreamer brzdreamer 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 17

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    All I ever want to do is eat!! I'm not even hungry all the time I just do it from being bored, stressed, and because well food is just delicious! I am definitely a binge eater and...
    kortskat kortskat 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 21

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    When and why did eating become so hard? :/
    jackjack600 jackjack600 18-21, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    Does anyone else always feel guilty every night at this time after eating and worry about how many calories and weight gain! Just wanna be skinny
    redheadxx redheadxx 18-21, F 4 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    Hello, my name is Cara. I am 21 and have been struggling with some eating issues since I was about 16. I love food and my love of food has made me into a bit larger than I would...
    CaraLina CaraLina 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 30

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    I am bulimic and have been since December. 4 days ago I decided I wanted to get my **** together so I promised a friend of mine that if he quitted cigarettes I would quit throwing...
    Lifebugzme Lifebugzme 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 6

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    I can now honestly say I'm fully recovered from anorexia, bulimia and selfharm. I have had these problems since I was in P6 at school so around 10 years old. I'm now 17, the last 7...
    oliviiaxo oliviiaxo 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 6

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    I am anorexic. It started when my friends would poke my stomach and say I gained weight and I hate gaining weight I hate it. Then my dad started calling me fat and calling me a pig...
    Kelnea Kelnea 13-15, F Jul 7

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    People have different reasons for the cause of their eating disorders. Mine is from being depressed about my life. I can't help but think that my youth has been a waste. I want to...
    cringing cringing 16-17, F Jul 8

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    I don't know of this is really an eating disorder, but... I lose my appetite sometimes for days at a stretch and can only really eat one meal in the day and sometimes I don't eat...
    Loner1990 Loner1990 22-25, M 2 Responses Jul 13

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    Too bad I'm really good at keeping secrets. It's a doosy!!
    exitstageleft exitstageleft 41-45, M Jul 17

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    I have a few secrets and worries that I want to share with someone, I can't really post it as I'm too shy but it would be nice to have someone to talk about it, Preferably a girl...
    Adam352 Adam352 18-21, M 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    Is an untruth that never hurts anyone the same as actively keeping a shameful secret from coming to light? I would never cheat on her. Not ever, not for any woman no matter the...
    Hummingbird00 Hummingbird00 31-35, M 19 hrs ago

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    Sometimes when I'm in that after-purge state, looking at myself in the mirror, I think about the first time my parents called me fat. I think about the weigh-ins and how humiliated...
    Anniethinksyourebeautiful Anniethinksyourebeautiful 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 1

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    I'm too skinny!! I seriously hate it. I eat, I don't exercise to burn calories then why am I skinny!!! I'm bones I have no muscles nothing!! Why isn't there any easier way to gain...
    broadwaybabe99 broadwaybabe99 13-15, F 3 Responses Jul 1

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    I don't have a problem with the way I look. But I've noticed that I eat less then most people my age, even if they're smaller bad don't play sports (I play a lot of basketball and...
    SophieEg SophieEg 13-15, F Jul 8

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    Lol I usually avoid food with dairy, I will not eat chicken, beef and apples or anything with them. I am crazy for fish, especially mackerel :P haha I must drink at least 3 cups of...
    MoonlightCiel75 MoonlightCiel75 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 11

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    Help.. I have rumanation if anyone else has experience this can ye please help me. Thank you
    Sarahoneil Sarahoneil 18-21, F Jul 12

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    Jealousy. It makes me want to starve right now. As a social anxiety sufferer, I never get to do anything in my life. I'm always cooped up indoors on the weekends. "Social" is...
    Misfitbrokentoy Misfitbrokentoy 46-50, F Jul 12

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    Worst part of my disorder is that i feel i have to socially isolate myself to protect the disorder. Its painful 😔
    7405me 7405me 18-21, F 1 day ago

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    I haven't had a panic attack over food in a while. I maintained the weight of 92 for two weeks and now I don't have to see my doctor for month......well I started math camp at my...
    broadwaybabe99 broadwaybabe99 13-15, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Okay , it's been so long I didn't write anything , so I thought I would just update it up a little bit with what's happening with me nowadays. It's been like five months now I...
    CrushednBroken CrushednBroken 26-30, F 1 day ago

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    I have looked this disorder up it's disgusting it's embarrassing. I chew and spit food😳 I know I knkw..,it's taken over meeee I lost weight after my 3rd child by balanced..well...
    daisydoes daisydoes 26-30, F Jul 6

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    I just seem to have such weird desires
    Ivydelrey Ivydelrey 16-17, F 1 Response Jul 17

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    Remeber when I said my mom had a vodka bottle bout maybe 2 1/2 inches tall And I said I wanted to try it we'll I opened it smelled it and it smelled amazing I haven't drunking it...
    imnotthatspecia imnotthatspecia 13-15, F Jul 19

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    Been on an off it's crazyyyyy....
    sashakimi4 sashakimi4 18-21, F Jul 2

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    Sometimes I don't know what to cook, so I make breakfast foods 😋
    HappensForAReason HappensForAReason 13-15, M Jul 4

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    I can't eat. Even if I make breakfast, lunch, or dinner.. I end up throwing it out because the look and smell disgust me.
    xxmusicdemonxx xxmusicdemonxx 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 5

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    My mom (a former bulimic) found out about my bulimia last night, so I was planning on keeping tonight's dinner down to keep her happy. Until I found out what we were having...
    punicorn1 punicorn1 13-15, F 2 Responses Jul 6