and he asked me when last I've been to an optometrist?
Me: 1997 (when I got my last specs, which I only wear at work)
Shame.. He thought I was kidding, poor soul.
After all my tests he struggled to understand how I could still be alive. My eyes are that weak.
About the only thing that's helping me to keep going, these days, is humor.
Oh, I'm no comic, I'm not even all that funny...but, I don't let that stop me.
Today, I called a bunch of idiots. Yep, I called Texas, Kentucky and New Jersey!
To try to butter her up to maybe...
declaration of love posted in my inbox by the same person. Now I only responded the very first time this scammer posted it and my question to him was. Really?!! Wow, since we never met a day in our life and I know you don't know me, yet according to your message we are well into...
and I were the only two left in the office, when everyone had gone and we started talking about series we currently enjoy.
I asked him if he had seen lucifer and he replied. 'Yes, I'm just like him. '
Me: 'Does this mean you're going to seduce me now, Shane?'
I never saw...
and Dolly Parton pass away
As they both arrive at heaven St. Peter tells them
Sorry ladies we've only room for one any ideas who it should be
The queen and dolly look at each other then dolly takes out her boobs and shows them to St. Peter and says
You've got to let these in...
and orders three beers. The bartender asks why. The man says, "I have two brothers who live far away so each year they go to a bar and order 3 drinks and I go to one so that way it feels like we are still drinking together even though we cant see each other". The bartender...