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I Have Abuse Flashbacks

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 130 People

    Just Like It's Happening Again.

    The lights are off. Almost asleep, have to get the rest for work in the morning. I shut my eyes, and im back. Back to being 4, remembering exactly, as if it was now. Standing on the side walk. Doing something to make him mad. I cant remember what, but then theres a hand coming at...
    foreverashamed foreverashamed 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 14, 2012

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    I dated a murderer

    I once dated someone who I loved so much, I would have done anything for . I was 21 years old, he was 22 . We were the most inseperable couple out there . There wasn't a day that we weren't together . To me it felt like a relief to have someone that close to me in my life . I was...
    remember22 remember22 22-25, F 3 Responses Sep 12, 2013

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    It's a problem for me

    that I don't know if I'll explain right but I'll try. My dad was physically and verbally abusive to me and would beat the he'll out of me and intimidate me and my mum was mentally abusive, constantly putting me down and making me feel worthless especially because of my gender...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jul 31

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    Oh I Remember...

    its always at night, i lay my head on my soft comfy pillow and in flows the thoughts of life and questions and then the memories and flashbacks.oh i remember when i was even younger than today maybe 7 or so. i remember the stove, fire , my fathes bellowing voice, and my burning...
    apml apml 18-21, F Feb 28, 2012

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    And I Desperately Wish My Mind Would Just Stay In The Present.

    I don't have flashbacks as much as I used to and of that I am very grateful, but sometimes the triggers are simply everywhere...which means that so are my mind and emotions. My family was horribly abusive; those who didn't actively abuse me neglected me, and friends of the...
    ManuNani ManuNani 31-35 Sep 2, 2012

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    Good Times and Bad, They Are There

    I've wrote a few stories briefly explaining some of the abuse I dealt with as a child, I guess it's time to talk about the flashbacks and triggers. My flashbacks can be so real, so graphic, they cause tunnel vision and take me to my knees. I can most times feel the same feelings...
    ImminentDisaster ImminentDisaster 26-30, M 7 Responses Jul 28, 2009

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    I Cant Believe What I Did. And I Cant Believe The Reason.

    Being abused mentally and physically is something i got used to. Its just something that happened in my house. My Father was around, always was. But he wasnt a dad. He hates me. Hes told me so. The only memorys i have are of being screamed at or hit. So when a guy that was old...
    foreverashamed foreverashamed 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 14, 2012

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    They Are the Worse...

    I suffer from abuse flashhbacks, they are no fun living with, and having to deal with on a basis. I hate it more than anyone can possibly understand. I was diagnossed with PTSD, and it explains why I get the flashbacks, as bad as I do. I don't like dealing with them at all...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jul 27, 2009

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    The Ultimate Form Of Deception

    Rough night...childhood flashbacks...again. Can't pinpoint any one particular trigger...just seems to be accumulative...the whole big picture...both then and now. Like a ton of bricks it levels you. Out of the blue...blindsided...again...when you thought you were doing fine. Will...
    Solitaire1 Solitaire1 46-50, M 5 Responses Dec 22, 2011

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    I Don'T Think I Can Do This

    It's so hard. I just want to be able to drive down the road, go to the grocery store, have coffee, lunch with a friend, a hug, a kiss. I am tortured by my own memories. Some of which I don't even remember properly. I am afraid all the time. I don't want to be here. I don't want...
    LolahP LolahP 22-25, F 1 Response Sep 29, 2013

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    Do Not Read If You Don't Want to Know Part of What Happens In the Movie Gran Torino

    I don't really get them a lot.  They're actually very, very, very rare, but when they happen they're pretty nuts.  They last for a couple minutes and then after that I realize that it's stupid to let it plague my mind so I tell myself to stop.  And so I stop. The...
    yoyy yoyy 26-30, F 5 Responses Jul 27, 2009

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    Many Times Flash Backs Are Like The Seasons

    they come and go witht he time of the year basic when they happened i thing. many times things in our life trigger them or if we are under stress they seem to be able to attack easyer which there was a pill to make them stop or to remove some of the feelings but so far never...
    rickibrat2 rickibrat2 61-65, M Jun 19, 2011

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    Abuse Flashbacks Are Here Again.

    I wondered if my abuse memories would start up again. It's like they have a separate life of their own.  In 1993, I had 12 yrs of sobriety and 7yrs of counseling.  The memories would increase in severity.  Abuse memories can be different...
    WarriorMom WarriorMom 51-55, F 4 Responses Oct 28, 2008

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    Is It Real? Or Just A Dream.

    ***Animal cruetly triggers*** I've been having dreams about my uncle laltely. My mom has 7 brothers, this one is stranger than all of her brothers. He's the second oldest brother ( I think) and he acts more childish than all of them. He says strange things to my sister, like...
    LivDragonfly LivDragonfly 22-25, F 2 Responses Mar 1, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    I'm an interracial adoptee from Africa, adopted by a white family. These last few years I've been thinking about the stories my adoptive parents have told me about what happened...
    Tearystar1027 Tearystar1027 18-21 4 hrs ago

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    He was a physical and emotional abuser of my mom, me & Siblings, I don't know how my mom married this stupid guy.... !!! But to be honest he changed my life to choose right path...
    bak4u bak4u 26-30, M 1 Response 7 hrs ago

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    I got so mad that I scratched my arm so hard with a pencil and now i regret it :( it looks like i self harm but i really dont yet i wish i could just cope with all this stress and...
    Stressed14 Stressed14 16-17, M 12 hrs ago

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    I haven't been tested to see if I truly have PTSD, but I just might have it. These flashbacks I have of the horrible things I've gone through shock and terrify me all over again. I...
    xMellowButterflyx xMellowButterflyx 18-21, F 4 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    Started at 13 from weed,pills,alcohol,coke,and now I'm snorting meth wtf am I doing
    Snorter559 Snorter559 16-17, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I met this really tall guy who was a friend of my friend. This guy and I stayed at my friend's house when my friend and my brother went to go pizza. He and I talked for two hours...
    lucretiainthenight lucretiainthenight 16-17, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    And sexually abused. The sad thing is when I want to talk about it with someone they dismiss me so easily because I'm male. Physically abused? I should have 'manned up' and fought...
    LukasMeoww LukasMeoww 16-17, T 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    Before medication and counselling, I would go out for a drive and scream bloody murder, argue, accuse, question other people in my life, including myself. My throat would become...
    just2curious2 just2curious2 51-55, M 5 days ago

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    I'm not a loud or confrontational person. I was kicked out of my family and disowned because my mother and my brother were abusing my brothers kids. My mother is the one that...
    letters2mymother letters2mymother 41-45, F 6 days ago

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    Verbal Abuse is more damaging than physical abuse because the marks are hidden and it takes a lot more to heal.
    fr33bird fr33bird 51-55, M 6 Responses a week ago

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    i faced one of my biggest triggers not long ago. of water, flashbacks and panic attacks came but the more i fought it for control easier it became. the trigger is still there but...
    stormofself stormofself 18-21, M 2 Responses a week ago

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    I just had someone ask about my childhood abuse, it's made me think another thought, from another day another time. I was contacted by a paedophile on here earlier in the year...
    Littlemisssomebody Littlemisssomebody 31-35, F 1 Response Aug 24

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    I recently decided to stop speaking to my mother. I know she will never admit to what she did, but I was able to overlook it in the interest of my brother. This summer it became...
    AliM3ss AliM3ss 22-25, F 2 Responses Aug 22

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    When I was almost four years old I saw a dead that's been left on the streets. I was red and swollen and had the had the worst smell you could imagine. Apparently, we had a...
    wallflower01 wallflower01 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 20

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    Sometimes I'll be watching TV or cooking or in the shower or just doing nothing and have flashbacks of every time something happened. My heart starts beating very hard and I start...
    HelloEla HelloEla 18-21, F 4 Responses Aug 18

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    I feel kind of alone in my experience of PTSD. most of the people I hear about who have it were victims of abuse or crimes. I have PTSD from caring for my mother as a child when...
    kg54933 kg54933 26-30, F 6 Responses Aug 18

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    I've started realizing how affected my life is by my PTSD. I guess when you've had it since u were a young child you get use to it. Honestly the feelings I felt, all the different...
    BeautifullySickkk BeautifullySickkk 31-35, F 4 Responses Aug 18

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    I have gone through stories of abuse here...both physically and mental abuse...children being molested and harassed by members of their own family, adults who should have...
    SolitaireGent SolitaireGent 41-45, M 4 Responses Aug 16

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    My experience of abuse is most likely not as bad as most people's but I'd still like to share.. The first time I was abused by my dad was when I came home late from a friends...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Aug 16

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    Just had a couple flashbacks not long ago...it's inducing insomnia but I don't know if I really want sleep now. Just seems like it would be miserable if I get triggered again..
    FreightTrainOG FreightTrainOG 18-21, M Aug 15

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    Anger is not something to be ashamed of. Anger is a natural response to injustice and can help break the cycle of abuse. Anger is a crucial part of recovery. Two weeks ago on 7/31...
    wowodeals wowodeals 26-30, F Aug 15

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    Anger is not something to be ashamed of. Anger is a natural response to injustice and can help break the cycle of abuse. Anger is a crucial part of recovery. Two weeks ago on 7/31...
    wowodeals wowodeals 26-30, F Aug 15

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    Anger is not something to be ashamed of. Anger is a natural response to injustice and can help break the cycle of abuse. Anger is a crucial part of recovery. Two weeks ago on 7/31...
    wowodeals wowodeals 26-30, F Aug 15

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    Anger is not something to be ashamed of. Anger is a natural response to injustice and can help break the cycle of abuse. Anger is a crucial part of recovery. Two weeks ago on 7/31...
    wowodeals wowodeals 26-30, F Aug 15

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    Anger is not something to be ashamed of. Anger is a natural response to injustice and can help break the cycle of abuse. Anger is a crucial part of recovery. Two weeks ago on 7/31...
    wowodeals wowodeals 26-30, F 1 Response Aug 15

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    Anger is not something to be ashamed of. Anger is a natural response to injustice and can help break the cycle of abuse. Anger is a crucial part of recovery. Two weeks ago on 7/31...
    wowodeals wowodeals 26-30, F Aug 15

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    Anger is not something to be ashamed of. Anger is a natural response to injustice and can help break the cycle of abuse. Anger is a crucial part of recovery. Two weeks ago on 7/31...
    wowodeals wowodeals 26-30, F Aug 15

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    Anger is not something to be ashamed of. Anger is a natural response to injustice and can help break the cycle of abuse. Anger is a crucial part of recovery. Two weeks ago on 7/31...
    wowodeals wowodeals 26-30, F 1 Response Aug 15

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