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I Have Abuse Flashbacks

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 125 People

    Abuse Flashbacks Are Here Again.

    I wondered if my abuse memories would start up again. It's like they have a separate life of their own.  In 1993, I had 12 yrs of sobriety and 7yrs of counseling.  The memories would increase in severity.  Abuse memories can be different...
    WarriorMom WarriorMom 51-55, F 4 Responses Oct 28, 2008

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    The Ultimate Form Of Deception

    Rough night...childhood flashbacks...again. Can't pinpoint any one particular trigger...just seems to be accumulative...the whole big picture...both then and now. Like a ton of bricks it levels you. Out of the blue...blindsided...again...when you thought you were doing fine. Will...
    Solitaire1 Solitaire1 46-50, M 5 Responses Dec 22, 2011

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    I Cant Believe What I Did. And I Cant Believe The Reason.

    Being abused mentally and physically is something i got used to. Its just something that happened in my house. My Father was around, always was. But he wasnt a dad. He hates me. Hes told me so. The only memorys i have are of being screamed at or hit. So when a guy that was old...
    foreverashamed foreverashamed 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 14, 2012

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    And I Desperately Wish My Mind Would Just Stay In The Present.

    I don't have flashbacks as much as I used to and of that I am very grateful, but sometimes the triggers are simply everywhere...which means that so are my mind and emotions. My family was horribly abusive; those who didn't actively abuse me neglected me, and friends of the...
    ManuNani ManuNani 31-35 Sep 2, 2012

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    Just Like It's Happening Again.

    The lights are off. Almost asleep, have to get the rest for work in the morning. I shut my eyes, and im back. Back to being 4, remembering exactly, as if it was now. Standing on the side walk. Doing something to make him mad. I cant remember what, but then theres a hand coming at...
    foreverashamed foreverashamed 16-17, F 2 Responses Apr 14, 2012

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    Is It Real? Or Just A Dream.

    ***Animal cruetly triggers*** I've been having dreams about my uncle laltely. My mom has 7 brothers, this one is stranger than all of her brothers. He's the second oldest brother ( I think) and he acts more childish than all of them. He says strange things to my sister, like...
    LivDragonfly LivDragonfly 22-25, F 2 Responses Mar 1, 2011

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    Oh I Remember...

    its always at night, i lay my head on my soft comfy pillow and in flows the thoughts of life and questions and then the memories and flashbacks.oh i remember when i was even younger than today maybe 7 or so. i remember the stove, fire , my fathes bellowing voice, and my burning...
    apml apml 16-17, F Feb 28, 2012

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    Do Not Read If You Don't Want to Know Part of What Happens In the Movie Gran Torino

    I don't really get them a lot.  They're actually very, very, very rare, but when they happen they're pretty nuts.  They last for a couple minutes and then after that I realize that it's stupid to let it plague my mind so I tell myself to stop.  And so I stop. The...
    yoyy yoyy 26-30, F 5 Responses Jul 27, 2009

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    Many Times Flash Backs Are Like The Seasons

    they come and go witht he time of the year basic when they happened i thing. many times things in our life trigger them or if we are under stress they seem to be able to attack easyer which there was a pill to make them stop or to remove some of the feelings but so far never...
    rickibrat2 rickibrat2 61-65, M Jun 19, 2011

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    Good Times and Bad, They Are There

    I've wrote a few stories briefly explaining some of the abuse I dealt with as a child, I guess it's time to talk about the flashbacks and triggers. My flashbacks can be so real, so graphic, they cause tunnel vision and take me to my knees. I can most times feel the same feelings...
    ImminentDisaster ImminentDisaster 26-30, M 7 Responses Jul 28, 2009

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    They Are the Worse...

    I suffer from abuse flashhbacks, they are no fun living with, and having to deal with on a basis. I hate it more than anyone can possibly understand. I was diagnossed with PTSD, and it explains why I get the flashbacks, as bad as I do. I don't like dealing with them at all...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jul 27, 2009

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    I dated a murderer

    I once dated someone who I loved so much, I would have done anything for . I was 21 years old, he was 22 . We were the most inseperable couple out there . There wasn't a day that we weren't together . To me it felt like a relief to have someone that close to me in my life . I was...
    remember22 remember22 22-25, F 3 Responses Sep 12, 2013

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    I Don'T Think I Can Do This

    It's so hard. I just want to be able to drive down the road, go to the grocery store, have coffee, lunch with a friend, a hug, a kiss. I am tortured by my own memories. Some of which I don't even remember properly. I am afraid all the time. I don't want to be here. I don't want...
    LolahP LolahP 22-25, F 1 Response Sep 29, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    Sometimes I start to feel really ****** about myself, I could feel great the whole day then something hits me and I'm down for days. I usually don't consciously feel threatened by...
    groovyhugsbunny groovyhugsbunny 18-21, F 1 Response May 21

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    I scratch myself instead of cutting because it doesn't bleed as much. I tell My mom I did it in my sleep so I don't have to hide them at home.
    pyrodexx46 pyrodexx46 16-17, F May 13

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    I like blue an black brutal marks on my body..
    Frozengirl20 Frozengirl20 22-25, F 2 Responses May 13

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    hello all I'm like video call sex and you like sex with me??
    sawanch sawanch 22-25, M May 14

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    Trigger warning here for any other potential victims. I was abused sexually by three men by the time I was twelve. One I constantly saw since he lived in my hometown after the...
    Bobbiin Bobbiin 18-21, F 1 Response May 6

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    I fall in love with my abusers I can't remember the name of what this is called but I do it. I was sexually abused 7-9 years old that's year 2-4 in primary school when I was 12/13...
    polarbearlove polarbearlove 16-17, F 2 Responses 18 hrs ago

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    Child abuse of any kind is unacceptable under any circumstance. However I do believe in spanking the child to teach a lesson. There is a line between spanking, and beating. I think...
    JohnnyLeeKeyboardist JohnnyLeeKeyboardist 41-45, M 4 Responses 4 hrs ago

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    Mental abuse is just as bad as physical abuse. At 15, I got together with a 23 year old. He kept me home, tried to steal me from my family, made me grow up, and found out I was...
    amberraine amberraine 18-21, F 5 hrs ago

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    I agree with this. Because women are very wonderful. I've never met a lady that hasn't been special to me all women and men are special in their own way. I believe the people who...
    FortunateAce4 FortunateAce4 16-17, M 21 hrs ago

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    How can you get other some that haunts you every single day? You may ask me how here is the answer. When I was young about the age of four/five I remeber very little but they say...
    WannaBeAna1 WannaBeAna1 13-15, F 20 hrs ago

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    Everyday I try to move past it. Slowly I am moving forward. I am still not completely happy with myself. At first it was only nightmares, but I bc I didn't feel worthy of anyone...
    GoneGirl17 GoneGirl17 16-17, F 1 Response May 16

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    I was molested at age 7 by an older classmate at school. It was a female. It was in the girl's bathroom on more than one occasion. I remember trying to convince myself that it...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response May 13

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    I have dated a guy on and off for the past two years who is extremely emotionally abusive, controlling and manipulative. I feel like I can never do anything right and have been...
    kimbeeslice kimbeeslice 26-30, F 2 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    Can you have Stockholm syndrome if you want to get away from the abuser?
    lrl75 lrl75 36-40, F 1 Response 16 hrs ago

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    I'm still not certain about being a survivor. Mom was 15 when I was born, and I was 5 when she and her new boyfriend were murdered. They were both bound and forced to watch her...
    scarred4lifeby5 scarred4lifeby5 61-65, M 10 hrs ago

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    I'm having so much flashbacks these times...I never had so much before! I am tired of seeing his face on top of me. I'm doing my thing and then all of a sudden, I am 8 years old...
    symbule symbule 22-25, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    My dreams used to be an adventure a place that left me enchated sartisfied and hopefull then things changed my dreams my great escape became the worst place to be the once great...
    00Broken00 00Broken00 18-21, F 10 hrs ago

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    I can't stop thinking about what you said the last time we spoke. You were always good at pushing just the right buttons. You hurt and manipulate. You arouse and titilate. You...
    laughingtiger laughingtiger 26-30, F 4 hrs ago

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    I feel so tired but I can't sleep. Any recommendations on how to calm really bad flashbacks? Music is a little soothing, but is having, strangely, barely any effect tonight.
    betruetoyourself14 betruetoyourself14 13-15, F 1 Response May 9

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    I can't breathe properly. This triggered me completely. Memories, flashbacks. Holy sh*t. Why do people have to post such perverted, insensitive stuff?
    betruetoyourself14 betruetoyourself14 13-15, F 1 Response May 11

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    I was an abused child growing up, all done by step-fathers. I don't hold anything against my mother, since she was mistreated along with me. My first step-father abused me and my...
    Sonicblu Sonicblu 41-45, M 2 Responses May 17

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    I am 14 let me start off before I was born my mom smoked drank got on roller coasters and she knew that she was pragnat she tired to she tried to have an abortion but she was too...
    Kellyfoster2000 Kellyfoster2000 13-15, F 3 Responses May 3

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    So many people carrying the same wounds and pain… I am one of them…My mother abused me horribly, but I managed disconnect from her as I was age 4-5. I told myself: this is...
    soulbridge soulbridge 36-40, F 1 Response May 6

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    Here is some of the dreadful things I experienced while being gangstalked. And yes. it does exist. This may help you if you are reading to identify with some, if not all. Also, at...
    goldenview goldenview 31-35 May 20

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    "That my body is all that I am", how well I know the feeling. I just read about another woman that was sexually abused growing up and the quote is from her story. Reading it made...
    CaningCaregiver CaningCaregiver 26-30, F 2 Responses May 4

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    I am triggered every time someone tells a man that having been sexually abused by a woman is something to be proud of, happy about, etc. Abuse is abuse, not a rite of passage. We...
    lovevolves8 lovevolves8 36-40, F 1 Response May 7

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    Joking about abuse isn't okay. Abuse is not a joke. I repeat: JOKING ABOUT ABUSE ISN'T OKAY. ABUSE IS NOT A ******* JOKE.
    prettylittlenothing prettylittlenothing 18-21, F May 13

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    Hi I go by Fruity punch on here.I would like to share a personal story from my experience with my mother.Let me start back when I was younger for you to understand the emotional...
    Fruitypunch15 Fruitypunch15 31-35 1 Response May 13

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    At the age of 14 I think, my dad sexually abused me.. I don't remember it all, but the first time it happen, me and him was going to travel to another country to met his brother...
    Bekerkrkrk55 Bekerkrkrk55 18-21, F 1 Response May 20

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    There was a time when I had no idea what abuse is. I experienced a form of abuse as bullying in my teen years. I thought it was a nightmare. It changed me at the core. But I still...
    themanoflegends themanoflegends 26-30, M 1 Response