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I Have Abused My Body

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,595 People

    My Problem

    I have trictotilimania (probably spelled that wrong) which means I obsessively pull out my hair, eyelashes, eyebrows, ect. I don't know what to do.
    leftykat8 leftykat8 16-17, F 4 Responses Nov 17, 2009

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    Your Personal Pleasure Doll

    Play with me, use me, do whatever you want. I can pleasure you, I can fulfill your needs. Just tell me what to do and you'll have it. I was stupid. No, I'm still stupid up to now. I was a s/ut, a wh0re, name it. I give my body to strangers or friends. I let them use me. I even...
    GirlWithThePWSBM GirlWithThePWSBM 13-15, F 4 Responses Jul 13, 2013

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    I've been a cutter since I was 12 years old.

    My life isn't the worse, but i didn't have the greatest childhood. Cutting got rid of the pain.
    babykaykez19 babykaykez19 18-21, F 3 Responses Jan 27

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    I Know How You Feel

    The title of my story is what people falsely say to me all the time. Nobody knows how I feel. I am 19 years old and have been cutting for about five years. I've been better with the cutting lately, but when my anger or sadness gets the best of me, I just can't control it. I get...
    Hollyvm92 Hollyvm92 18-21, F Jul 29, 2012

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    "It's Been a While Since I Could Say That I Wasn't Addicted and It's Been a While Since I Could Say I Love Myself As Well."

    I'd always assumed the inclination toward self-destruction started when I was thirteen, when I woke up that morning on April the first, and suddenly found myself without the will to live. I'd always thought I had been okay prior to that morning. When I think on it, though, I...
    SheistheLorax SheistheLorax 18-21, F 5 Responses Jul 2, 2009

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    Burned, cut, scraped,

    bruised, you name it. I have been a self mutilator since I was 9 or 10. I started getting serious in seventh grade. By serious I mean actual self harming. I would give myself second degree burns, cut to where you could see past the white layer of skin and leave large gashes, and...
    IamMorbid IamMorbid 18-21, M 1 Response Feb 5

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    Everyday It Seems

    I cut my arms and repeat the cut in the same spot, going as deep as I can before the pain makes me drop the knife. I've made my own cat--nine tails whip, which i fling over my shoulders onto my back. I take thumb tacks and jab them into my legs through my pants. I punch myself...
    Rysdullieth Rysdullieth 18-21, M 2 Responses May 17, 2010

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    Self-harm

    I've been cutting since I was 12 and sometimes I would stop and I would start again. Recently, I went about 75 days without doing anything to myself until something happened that caused me to start again. And now it's back to stopping and starting every week or something. I'd...
    lockerkid lockerkid 18-21, F Jul 20, 2012

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    Here We Go Again!

    I've shared my story of why and how I started and then stopped cutting. Truth is the urge is coming back and im having a hard time dealing with it. I feel like **** for the fact I can't stop thinking about putting something in my arm that will feel me better if U want. I feel...
    bornconfused bornconfused 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 24, 2013

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    It Seems Like My Only Option

    I don't cut myself, but I burn myself. I take anything metal & press it against my straightner and put it on my arm. I even damaged the nerves on my arm. I hate myself for doing it but for those couple seconds, that pain is worse than the pain on the inside. I told my friend...
    jjaakkhh jjaakkhh 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 4, 2012

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    Soul And Body

    Voluntary and involuntary. Most of the times my body is hurt from falling up stairs or off of stages or tripping over my own feet. My poor body even has to endure walking into poles, tables, chairs, walls and trees (in my defence, the trees jump in front of me). Or my hair...
    Floydess Floydess 18-21, F Aug 25, 2012

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    Living With This Fate..

    It's nothing I am proud of believe me, but sometimes I feel there is no other way. I love pain and always have apparently. I used to get beat and my dad left and I start beating myself, kinda ****** up and I don't know it started, but I feel like it is never going to stop. I like...
    SecretSpirit SecretSpirit 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 14, 2011

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    Not In The Physical Sense

    I would never intentionally harm myself physically, but sometimes I wonder if not taking care of yourself is a kind of self abuse. I've used alcohol and cigarettes to fill in the blanks in my life, if that makes any sense. I don't drink hard liquor or get wasted, and I only do it...
    455cargirl 455cargirl 36-40, F 4 Responses Jul 10, 2013

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    Yep

    I've slit my wrists I've tried to die, I've smothered myself I've carved names into my skin. The funny thing is the marks fade the memories don't. You would not guess I have this darkness if you saw me I am happy you would think that I am a good kid because I hide my real self...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jul 13, 2013

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    Self Mutilation.

    I have cut since sophomore year of high school. I just finished my junior year of college. I have been in and out of eating disorders since sophomore year of high school. First semester this passed school year, I started uncontrollably drinking in the middle of the day out of...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jun 9, 2012

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    Where Do I Start.

    When i was young i was used to skate. Inline. I got first place in competition in a local skate park. If you don't fall you aren't trying hard enough was the general theme of this period of my life. During this time i also played drums. Bad for the wrists. Then i picked up...
    PreferAnAstronaut PreferAnAstronaut 18-21, M Jul 2, 2011

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    My Bodies Punishment.

    I made my body suffer for events in my life I blamed myself for. For such a long time I blamed myself and as a consequence punished myself. I abused alcohol and drugs, I self harmed and I had an eating disorder. Even though I have come out the winner from these battles I did...
    randomdriftwood randomdriftwood 21-25, F 4 Responses Aug 4, 2007

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    6 Years...

    Hi, my name is Emily. I'm 17 years old. I'm straight, I have an amazing boyfriend; we are so happy together, we are perfect for each other. He's the only reason I'm still alive. I'm currently being emotionally, mentally, and verbally abused by my mother. I was being physically...
    reasonibreath reasonibreath 16-17, F Sep 5, 2012

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    My Body Is A Temple

    My behavioursDon't do it any favours.My bad habitsAnnoy it.A future immersed in formaldehydeAwaits my traits.Poisons, burns,I've treasonously filled it with germs.I've starved it, carved it and laughed at it.And worse,I tried to outsmart it.
    CrookedMan CrookedMan 46-50 Jan 17, 2011

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    Cut Cut Cut Heps

    i stillcut myself now and then not just slashes but shapes words it relaxes me.
    wontstaydead wontstaydead 18-21, M Aug 3, 2012

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    It Has Been Through A Lot.

    I have been abusing my body for along time. Internal and external. When I was 9 I started cutting my left calf. Luckily, all the scars have faded by now. You can only see the remnants of them in the dark under a light . I moved onto my wrist when I was about 11. My left wrist has...
    KawaiiDoll KawaiiDoll 18-21, F 1 Response May 28, 2011

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    Doesnt Care

    my friend doesn't even care that I selfharm. She makes a joke about it& tells me to not do it in such obvious places. It kills me knowing she doesn't care, it only makes me do it more. I have nobody who cares or who will listen.
    jjaakkhh jjaakkhh 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 29, 2012

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    Not Sure Where To Start

    To be honest i'm not sure what to say on here but i want to get this out somewhere, For a number of years now i have abused my body, it started with burning myself by putting my cigarettes out on my arms when the pain inside was just to much, almost like a relief almost like...
    pleaseneverfindout pleaseneverfindout 18-21, M 2 Responses Oct 7, 2011

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    A Few Years Ago I Tried to Starve Myself Because I Hated How I Looked.

    Just because I was a couple pounds overweight I started dieting to the extreme, and lost a whole lot of weight, and everyone said I looked good, so that spurred me to keep doing it. But I started having severe health problems, which brought me back to my hypochondriac tendencies...
    LonelySoul LonelySoul 18-21, F Jul 21, 2007

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    I Missed My Razor

    My razor.. Some Poeple might refer to it as there best friend. It was mine. Then I just threw it away like it was nothing. It kept calling to me and the urge became stronger and stronger Until I lost. Until I cut. The blade won. I cut. Tonight I cut. That blade.. The pain.. Was...
    GuardianAngel9400 GuardianAngel9400 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 15, 2012

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    I Used To Cut Myself.

    It was stupid I was a teenager and I felt like I deserved it. I still have the scars on my forearm.. they get itchy sometimes, especially irritated when my arm rubs against my bosoms while I tye on my computer at work if I'm wearing a thick sweater. its so annoying. I wish I...
    DecemberLady DecemberLady 22-25, F 3 Responses May 6, 2012

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    Dont Stop

    My body is abused by myself I scratch at my skin till theirs blood I cut nyself until all my thoughts are drained I don't feed it I don't let it drink it's suffering and it's because of me
    Shayalex Shayalex 18-21 1 Response Jan 9, 2013

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    I used to abuse my body.

    I cut, i hit, i punch walls just to feel pain. But then i realized how stupid i was. Appreciate your body, what you have. Appreciate what God has given you. If you feel like cutting i suggest you get a journal and express your feelings in the journal instead of cutting. Say no...
    nanantsha nanantsha 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 12

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    "i Have Abused My Body"

    i know anyone reading this might be sick of hearing the same stories over and over, and it probably won't matter you, but i guess it helps to type on here rather than talk where somebody can judge you, i have bulimia, and i know its wrong, but started cutting myself a few months...
    alishhaaa alishhaaa 16-17 2 Responses Nov 27, 2011

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    My New Blog..

    This is the first time I decided to tell the world about how I truly feel on the inside, dunno if I'll be able to though.. Wel if anyone's interested, check it out: justashadow.blog.com Maybe it will help :)
    niaa niaa 18-21, F Mar 30, 2013

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    More Than Anyone Will Ever Know.

    Iv abused my body beyond what anyone around me could think, since age 8 Iv hurt myself, inflicting pain when I couldnt cope, banging my head untill I became unconscious, ripping my hair out, digging my nails into my skin, but as I got older it got worse, I began cutting and...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Feb 3, 2012

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    Rampage

    the sad truth about life is that the diseas know as humanity is a struggle. a cruel fight for your life. the victor loses him or herself in the procces sometimes. the loser goes through a perssonal hell everyday. thinking about what could have been. what should have been. they...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Sep 29, 2012

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    Today I Say "I Have Abused My Body."...

    Abusing my body was a hobby of sorts. A dark one at that.. I used to cut myself a lot.. Needed a few of trips to the ER at some point of time. Life became difficult without it. Everyday I tried and failed to overcome it. Each morning a decision was made. "No more" Each evening...
    angeling angeling 22-25, F Apr 10, 2012

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    Ive Abused My Body

    well from age 14 to 23 I abused my body from eating way to much abusing food emotional eating through 23 to 25.5 I abused my body through smoking,drinking , binge eating and purging , and cutting on occasion also I used to hit myself legs mainly get...
    passionflower750 passionflower750 26-30, F Jul 22, 2012

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    The Young Me

    The young me was very naive, easily manipulated, gullible and quite often stupid; yet I was a very quiet, soft spoken, recluse child. I had somewhat of a difficult childhood and certain things I was unable to cope or deal with. I have abused my body in several ways, as means to...
    wildonedreaming wildonedreaming 22-25, F 2 Responses Sep 26, 2012

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    I overcame abusing my body

    when is was 12 years old. I used to cut the back of my thighs because I didn't want anyone to see my pain. I had a tough time with my home life and bullying. Things got out of my control and I panicked and began to cut myself. I regret doing that and if I could go back and re do...
    oliviathesmall oliviathesmall 13-15, F 1 Response Jan 17

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    A Girl's Best Friend!

    A girl's best friend that's how i used to see the blade. Everytime something would go wrong i would cut myslef led myself to bleed and for a a little while all my worries would disappear. My counsellor used to say that was my way of coping with things happening around me and i...
    bornconfused bornconfused 18-21, F 9 Responses Oct 31, 2012

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    I Still ..

    Cut my wrists but I just hide it better .
    morganx97 morganx97 16-17, F 2 Responses Oct 23, 2013

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    Overdoses

    Three times I have set out to exit this world.Three times I have failed. My Fourth attempt in the pipeline MUST succeed.
    GlenParva GlenParva 31-35, M Sep 4, 2012

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    I Took 50 Pills

    Theres rumors about me at school. One day, i came home crying because one group of girls kept calling me a bunch of names. I went to my room and swallowed 50 pills of my sleeping medicine and hoped not to awaken. I was dead. My mom found me dead. She rushed me to the ER. They...
    ImmaStayAnonymous ImmaStayAnonymous 13-15, F Jul 13, 2012

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    Cut💨 Scratched💨 Bitten💨 Burned💨 Starved💨 Bruised💨 Scarred.... You name it and I've probably done it. I have been self harming since the age of seven and still continue to do it to this day. I've always been alone😔 and always will be. My mother hates...
    bulimicbixtch49 bulimicbixtch49 13-15, F 2 Responses Apr 7

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    I Say Other People Hurt Me, But I Hurt Myself As Well

    Not only do I cut, but I pull out my hair. I pull my eyelashes. I go through different phases of either starving myself or completely binge eating. I also sometimes will just pinch myself with my long nails as hard as I can.
    Dancedancedance Dancedancedance 16-17, F 1 Response Aug 1, 2012

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    Need My Razor

    Where's my best friend when I need it. My razor. Is my best friend. When I was unhappy it made me happy. And I am just freaking out I need my razor. I need to feel it slicing my skin again. I need to feel that pain again. I need my razor!!!
    GuardianAngel9400 GuardianAngel9400 13-15, F Nov 14, 2012

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    I Did It All... Almost

    In my on darkness... I had did much abuse to myself, in response to the abuse I suffered from others. It doesn't make sense nor am I proud of it! I have hurt myself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. :-/ I use to cut myself, throw myself in walls in rage...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Mar 4, 2009

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    Right Index Finger

    Winter is coming and my right index finger will be turning white soon. It's because when I was about 13 I decided to hold my finger in ice water for a long time. I thought it would kill the nerves and have to be amputated and then I would "have an excuse" and people would feel...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Nov 27, 2012

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    Sorry, Body

    I kind of feel bad, really, when I think over it all. Whoever or whatever being or bad luck put me in this body must be really pissed off at the way I've treated it thus far into my life. From when I was young and used to romp around with my sisters or my friends, skinning...
    fadingvioletdawn fadingvioletdawn 18-21, F 4 Responses Aug 3, 2011

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    And I'm Amazed At The Recovery!

    When it comes to doing dumb things and taking way too many chances by keeping that atttitude of adolescent invincablitiy for far too long, I'm sure there are some with bigger and better stories, but I doubt there are many. In my case, when I turned 40, I knew it was time to...
    AlbertSAT AlbertSAT 66-70, M 2 Responses Jun 13, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    I retired Sept. 2010 looking forward for a wonderful retirement. I used to go to the gym 3 to 4 days a week, do a full body workout and jog 5 miles twice a week. I fished often and...
    larryelawson larryelawson 61-65 Apr 10

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    I just absolutely love their body , their tight muscles , strong arms and tough tight legs ....my god they look so hot , sweat dripping from their forehead...it's soo sexy! I wish...
    Norajean1109 Norajean1109 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 4

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    Hi there. I'm 18 and I was told by my therapist that I have BDD (Body Dysmorphic Disorder). I have had a terrible self image for as long as I can remember. I don't remember a time...
    agolden agolden 16-17, F a week ago

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    I have the body of a 14 year old boy. it's the worst.
    kaytiiimarie kaytiiimarie 18-21, F 5 Responses Apr 13

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    Learning to love my body has got to be the hardest task I have ever tried! Years of been told you are fat, years of been told you are horrible have taken their toll! I've cried a...
    Sandyshaw13 Sandyshaw13 36-40, F 1 Response 2 hrs ago

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    THIS IS A REAL AND LEGITMATE FORM OF ABUSE. I struggle with the fact that not only was my ex emotionally abusive, but so was my own father. I can legitimately say that I am...
    cemarie128 cemarie128 18-21, F 1 Response 3 hrs ago

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    I love learning anatomy and physiology, as well a disease and its process in the human body. Death does not scare me, creep me out, or make me sad. It is the bodies natural aging...
    veeshybi veeshybi 18-21, F 3 hrs ago

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    I don't know why, but lately I have begun to check out those blogs where they post pictures of women who are casually posed in amateur settings and are usually skimpily clad. What...
    expproj005 expproj005 46-50, M 3 Responses 2 hrs ago

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    Well I was at a party and had been drinking... probably a little too much but I crashed on the living room floor when in the middle of the night I wake up to find a guy I had met...
    freefallin11 freefallin11 18-21, F 2 Responses 54 mins ago