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I Have An Eating Disorder

This isn't a "pro" Eating Disorder (ED) Group. If you are "pro-ANA" or "pro-MIA" this Group isn't for you. This group is here for healing and helping. 3,583 People

    I don't want to starve,

    purge, eat compulsively, or to make things easier, I don't want to eat anymore! I don't want to do anything anymore! I just want to sit in my room, lights off, headphones on and just sit there until I die.
    XxBadXVibesxX XxBadXVibesxX 13-15, F 2 days ago

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    OMG can I please eat a ******* apple with out

    hating myself?? What the **** ED can you please leave me alone?!?!? FUCKK.
    disasterland disasterland 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 14

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    I Cant Eat Till Im Full and Keep My Food Down.

    In my family being full up is a sign of a good meal.  like after every sunday roast my dad always leans back in his chair pats his stomach proudly and says something about being full and how good a meal it was. Im not sure if I have ever liked being full like the rest...
    pine90apple pine90apple 18-21, F 4 Responses May 13, 2009

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    It's the sixth month of my ED now.

    I've lost five kilograms , don't feel weak at all tho. The same routine continues everyday college, studies, work , home, the tiring cycle. "Having an eating disorder is like having a secret life." Angry, defensive, and distraught define me now. At night I lay awake...
    CrushednBroken CrushednBroken 26-30, F Aug 28

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    Kelnea Kelnea 13-15, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    I was a gymnast when I was younger

    and gymnastics was my life. When I was about 11, I was getting really conscious about my weight and the way I looked. I started skipping meals and if I went to a party or to a restaurant, I would make myself throw up. When I was 12 all the way thru 13, I would only eat 2 meals...
    caribbeanbabe808 caribbeanbabe808 13-15, F Jul 8

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    cuttinggirl96 cuttinggirl96 18-21, F 1 Response May 15

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    Anorexia And Bulimia.

    Ive been struggling with eating disordered behaviors for 11 years that have run the gamut from restricting, binging and purging, laxative abuse, ipecac syrup on one occasion, and over exercizing. I pretty much have it beat except for the occasional relapse when i feel the need to...
    Lilcuppa Lilcuppa 70+ 6 Responses Sep 19, 2012

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    Well my dad used to tell me off

    for eating. I always had a revved up metabolism which continued well into my teens. I could rival any teenage boy. But I was active- I never missed an opportunity to try out a sport. I trained for karate 3-4 times a week, walked everywhere and was hoping to join the military...
    NekroNomikon NekroNomikon 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 24

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    Lying In Weight

    I suffered from anorexia nervosa as a teenager. You may have heard that before. You may be like me. I fell into that cadre of teens in the 1980’s, who followed the Jane Fonda doctrine of compulsive fitness. Ever the overachiever, I starved and exercised as well as I, a premed...
    tgura tgura 46, F 13 Responses Jul 2, 2007

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    I Had An Eating Disorder

    Im Stefanie, im 15, barely 5'2" and im finally able to say im a recovered anorexic. i was anorexic for 2 years of my life because i felt worthless. Every guy i had ever liked told me i was hideous and ugly and gross and i believed them. then, being the dumb, 13 year old girl i...
    wishingforrecovery wishingforrecovery 16-17, F Sep 8, 2013

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    The urges are coming back stronger

    than ever and I'm going back to what I was doing before. I have 3 types of eating disorders, B.E.D (binge eating disorder) Anorexia, and bulimia. So I fall under the EDNOS category. When I first tried the Ana diet I was supposed to go under 500 but instead I went under 300 so I...
    XxBadXVibesxX XxBadXVibesxX 13-15, F 2 days ago

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    I feel so gross I just had dinner

    and I'm really ******* mad at myself
    emgg emgg 13-15, F 2 days ago

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    My problem is I just love food too much.

    .but I also want to lose weight, I just don't know how to do it properly and I keep coming back to this.
    GreenLeaf1025 GreenLeaf1025 13-15, F 2 days ago

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    Maria134747 Maria134747 13-15, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    I want a friend that understands what I'm going

    through. Someone that shares the same experience as me as sad as it sounds.
    KyleeNichole94 KyleeNichole94 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 7

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    If you are currently recovering,

    I just want to let you know that you are so brave and so strong for concurring this, it might take time but you are doing so so well right now, don't forget that.
    AIiviah AIiviah 13-15, F 2 Responses Sep 6

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    I have relapsed greatly into bingeing

    and purging, my weight is now about 120lbs at 5'5-5'6.. I hate being a "healthy" weight. I need my bones back, everything was so much safer then. I will lose 10 pounds by october, then so on and so forth I suppose. Im not ready for recovery.
    discoveringisabel discoveringisabel 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 28

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    I keep making myself sick again

    and I can't seem to stop myself anymore however I don't want medical help I just want to help myself stop. It's so hard, I keep crying about my weight and it spoils my day because I'm constantly thinking about my stomach. I look in my mirror with disgust and the wish that u...
    ZoeLouise3399 ZoeLouise3399 13-15, F 6 Responses Jun 12

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    Umm... Where Do I Begin Or Where Did I Begin?

    Okay, well, I have strugled with bulimia for almost two years now.  I've struggled with anorexia for eight months.  I have lost so many things to this eating disorder.  I regret doing it everyday.  Yet it's so hard to stop.  I started at 130 pounds. ...
    Arisha09 Arisha09 16-18, F 19 Responses Apr 8, 2007

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    i gained twenty ******* pounds over the summer

    and i want to kill myself. It feels like the end of the world. How shallow and vain and stupid am I, that I care this much?
    Skirefly Skirefly 13-15, F 2 Responses Aug 26

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    I'm trying so hard to get better.

    ..not jut for me, but those around me as well. The only problem is that every time I eat an actual meal...I feel like I'm going to be sick. I just want to able to eat and not feel sick or guilty...
    jackjack600 jackjack600 18-21, F 3 days ago

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    I need to explain this to those

    who are not listening or severely don't get it: I am anorexic. This means that I take part in starving and restricting myself so that I can become thinner and more beautiful as a person so that people will be more inclined to see me as beautiful as a person on the inside. This...
    EmpowermentProject EmpowermentProject 31-35, F 6 Responses Jun 23

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    I had a short period of binge

    and purge history while I was in high school ( that was like 15yrs ago) and recently last year when I got promoted to a new position I started stressing out to a point I started that bad habit again. After all these years !!! It's only once a week but I am scared it's going to...
    romi777 romi777 31-35, F Aug 25

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    I struggle with the lingering habits of

    starvation I developed during a 5 year bout with adult-onset anorexia. I have realized lately that, even though I'm doing much better, I am still restricting too much. The weirdest thing is, my illness presented without any body-image issues. It's actually the opposite for me...
    Aimee17 Aimee17 41-45, F 2 Responses May 5

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    disasterland disasterland 18-21, F 6 Responses Aug 20

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    It's 7:27 p.m. And I've having my first meal of

    the day. If you can call it a meal. Ugh I'm letting this control me to much
    disasterland disasterland 18-21, F Aug 25

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    Hey x just kinda felt

    that i needed to post this too kinda get it of my head ! i'm going to see my therapist tomorrow and kinda need advise !! Basically i see her as i have been diagnosed with depression but recently i have beed struggling with really bad bulimia (just purging not bingeing) and...
    ZannaHuth98 ZannaHuth98 16-17, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    I threw up multiple times a day every day from

    the time I was 15 until I was 20. I was 5'10 and weighed 103 lbs at one point and I remember being so pleased that I could fit into quadruple 0 skinny jeans at hot topic. People would say I was too skinny but I took it as a compliment, I could barely move most of the time and...
    Tak88 Tak88 22-25, M 1 Response Jan 28

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    I'm sick of everyone telling me I'm 'too skinny'

    and bringing it up in nearly every conversation. I'm trying so hard to fight this and I have those I love trying to force me to eat and making jokes out of my illness which isn't helping! I just want to escape all of this, I wish people would understand that I don't enjoy being...
    gingexx gingexx 18-21, F 4 Responses Jun 7

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    Teeze22 Teeze22 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 5

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    jackjack600 jackjack600 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 27

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    If one more person tells me that

    if you have an eating disorder you are an attention seeker I am going to go mad! I didn't ask to not want to eat, I didn't ask to go round the shop looking at all the calories in food checking that I don't eat above 300 because I feel fat or that sometimes I'll sit there and...
    gingexx gingexx 18-21, F 4 Responses Jun 12

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    Help !

    i have struggled with my weight my whole life. i am now at a 'healthy weight' . it takes a lot for me just to maintain it, but i want to loose more. i cant help it. i weight myself all the time, and i go for days without really eating anything, then days when i binge eat. i...
    daxil daxil 31-35, F 7 Responses Jun 28, 2010

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    ...and I Am Still Overweight

    I am obsessed with putting food into my mouth. I haven't even finished chewing my first bite before I am thinking about the next. I am also thinking about how much I will need to throw up after I am done eating. I stay up later than I want to so that no one will hear me puking. I...
    sammy sammy 21-25, F 2 Responses Jun 12, 2007

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    I used to be 130, now I maintain 110,

    but it's nothing compared to the winter I was 79... I can't help but want it; the strength and hunger. I'm falling hard back into it and I don't even think about it or care.
    RexxTheDinosawr RexxTheDinosawr 18-21, F 2 Responses Aug 26

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    Ugh I don't know. Before you read this I'm just

    letting you know that I really hate the word "trigger" it's very misused and it makes me angry. So when I use this word, I am being dead seriously and I don't know how else to explain myself with out using the word "trigger". So, yeah. Enjoy reading my ****** up post? I...
    disasterland disasterland 18-21, F 5 Responses Sep 5

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    I just stopped feeding myself.

    It was a train without breaks. A train that can only go faster until it runs out of tracks or it hits a wall.
    Xingouttheos Xingouttheos 16-17, F 3 Responses Jul 27

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    I have struggled with EDNOS

    for a very long time. I believe that I'm doing much better but I know it will never go away.
    Soozkat Soozkat 22-25, F Aug 30

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    Hi Hello My name is Yasser celibate possible

    not know the girl be friendly
    ydawood ydawood 31-35, M Aug 30

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    Kelnea Kelnea 13-15, F 2 Responses Sep 7

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    Fading Away Day By Day.

    I have always have problems with eating disorders in my life... Last year I began to get much better, I began to eat healthy, became more energetic and fortunate! everything was great, I ate what I wanted and did not care about any calories, it was all so great, I felt so...
    Fezzii Fezzii 18-21, F 6 Responses Nov 13, 2013

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    Eating Disorders/ My Life And Eating Disorders

    Why do people get eating disorders? IN my opinion, it has nothing to do with losing weight, but is to do with control, because food is one of the only things you can control in your life. You can choose to eat, or choose not to, but in reality it's a slow long drawn out suicide...
    roadofdarkness roadofdarkness 36-40 1 Response May 27, 2012

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    Those times where the weigh ins are telling you

    you are gaining weight again but you have done everything to lose it.
    ivorianangel ivorianangel 18-21, F Aug 14

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    I need to be in control of at least one thing.

    I don't want to eat, so I don't. It is horrible to feel fat on my stomach, hips, I want to see my bones. Punish myself. Help myself. I'm just don't know.
    pianobookme pianobookme 13-15, F 2 Responses Aug 31

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    My daughter's birthday is the same day

    as my recovery birthday. When I tell people that my daughter my angel, I mean exactly that. When she was born, it was the happiest day of my life. Recently, she had her third birthday. Her third birthday and 5 years of ED recovery for me. Every year of her birthday, I am...
    Inherownwords Inherownwords 31-35, F 2 Responses Mar 24

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    i ******* hate how i cant eat whatever i want

    cause ana controls me every damn time and sometimes im sick of it. but i still have lose a **** ton of weight. fml.
    skeletora skeletora 13-15, F 3 days ago

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    It will never ******* end every time I think

    it's over it comes back and tears me apart at my core. I am weak and I do not want to waste anymore time on this rollercoaster
    kgorton1 kgorton1 18-21, F Sep 1

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    You'd Think....

    after so many good days, weeks, months, really, i am having one hell of a bad food day.  i know that i have to eat to stay well, but at this moment, i cannot force myself to.  the specter of the "perfect 24" hours without food is hanging, only 7 hours away...
    SunnyKris SunnyKris 26-30, F 4 Responses Aug 24, 2007

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    redheadxx redheadxx 18-21, F Sep 5

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    There is a girl who sits next to me in my

    ceramics class and I always thought she must be a lot younger than me. She is really really short and tiny. Today, I talked to her for the first time and she is actually my age. She was born with multiple organs outside of her body and only one ear.. She told me all about her...
    SadKittenOnLine SadKittenOnLine 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 23

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    I'm 5/10 and I'm 148 pounds,

    I know that is a bad thing but I just don't get hungry, what should i do
    dominick6 dominick6 13-15, M 2 Responses Sep 7

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    wow I'm so surprised at how many people on here

    have an ED as well. that's so sadπŸ˜” I purge, restrict and over exercise. I'm not underweight, though. what's up with EDNOS not being a thing anymore? now it's like OFSED? like wtf. anyone else have mpa? if you ever need support just message meπŸ’•πŸ˜Š
    westsidechillin westsidechillin 16-17, F 5 Responses May 13

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    Will It Ever End?

    When I was 16 I went on a diet to lose a couple of pounds.  I wasn't overweight, mind you, just wanted to do something right for my mom.  She has always had a hard time showing me love, and nothing I ever did seemed good enough for her.  I lost about 10 pounds and...