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I Have Been In An Abusive Relationship

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 6,078 People

    Will the 'you' shaped scar in my heart ever go

    away? I wonder- will I ever look at a man now and not imagine a broken nose, a blackened eye, a shattered phone? Does it ever get better? I don't think I'll ever truly love again, which is quite sad. I think I might always love you...which is even more so. You broke my trust...
    lovelyss lovelyss 22-25, F 8 Responses Jun 2

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    I was dating this guy

    for almost two years, everything was going fine for about 5 months, then things began to change when he started working at this dive shop with this elder lady, he started hanging out with her and the next thing I new he was sleeping with her. I loved him so much that u couldn't...
    bayislandschick bayislandschick 36-40, F 2 Responses Jun 20

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    Just found out that the man

    that abused me and ruined 10 years of my life is getting married ( to the young girl he cheated on me with ) I secretly hope that he dies of a massive heart attack the day of his wedding...
    1973danielle 1973danielle 36-40, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    Take a Look At My Girlfriend...

    I was 15, she was 17. You don't hear about abuse in gay relationships much, but there you are. I had never been with a girl before, and I was so in love and so sure I could never feel the same way again with anyone else. I stayed two years. I will never be the same person. I...
    ParselyTree ParselyTree 16-18, F 4 Responses Feb 20, 2008

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    My husband and I have been separated

    for over 7 months now. I had to file a civil protection order against him after he threatened the lives of myself and our children. He'd been getting progressively violent over the years. He started out as such a sweet individual at first, if possessing a short fuse. I never...
    Darkwater5378 Darkwater5378 31-35, F 5 Responses Jun 15

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    My husband goes for months sometimes just

    totally ignoring me. In January 2014, he did it for 13 weeks because he got mad at something I said. Now because I said something last weekend about being scared of him dying, he got mad. I asked him how long it would be till it ended again, and he said 27 days, 7 hours. When I...
    Tracieann Tracieann 56-60, F 1 Response Jun 15

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    I met my ex-husband at the age of 17.

    I never saw the red flags, mainly because I endured abuse growing up. I thought it was pretty normal when he got jealous of my friends, mad when he thought I did something wrong, and even ok when he broke things around the house. But with time, like every abusive relationship...
    lexy82 lexy82 31-35, F 3 Responses Jun 30

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    I just started seeing my abusive ex again.

    We split apart for three months. He has taken full responsibility for everything , and recognized his flaws now that he's had time to reflect. I would love to believe it, but I'm proceeding with caution. I'm scared . Does anyone have any red flags as what I should look for , or...
    leaom22 leaom22 22-25, F 8 Responses Jun 30

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    ....continued After

    that night at the marina, he started acting weird. He would call me 24/7 he'd insist on knowing where I was at all times & why I wouldn't answer him or text back. He became basically a stalker. He didn't want me to go out, to the gym, to shop, I used to work at a restaurant & he...
    ElenaSC ElenaSC 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 30

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    I've Grown, I've Survived , I'm Happy

    I had an affair with a "man" (more like a monster), in my early 20's that lasted about 5 years, it was an on and off thing.  That's how most abusive relationships are anyway. The first time he hit me was when I was driving.  We were late to an appointment and...
    golddustwoman golddustwoman 36-40, F 11 Responses Sep 11, 2008

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    Hush Sleepy Lion

    Hush sleepy lion, our cub is asleep where she lay, Roars the lion, Shudders the prey. ROARS the lion, Cowers the prey. ROARS THE LION! Prey squeals and shys away. Quiet now sleepy lion, You have had a long day. Sleep angry lion, Don't hurt your prey. I meant no harm, I've...
    Munchycaterpillar Munchycaterpillar 31-35, F 2 Responses Sep 30, 2013

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    To long I was in the trap of a abusive marriage.

    Everyday waking up trying to convince myself it was the "right" thing to do by staying. To keep my family together. Everyday his mental abuse and psychical abuse dragging me farther into my own personal hell. I remember nights curled up on the floor weeping from a beating or...
    Happythoughts7771 Happythoughts7771 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 2

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    So basically it all started in 2012,

    I thought I met what was the girl of my "dreams" how wrong was I? Although the abuse wasn't physical it was emotional and mental abuse. She got into my head. Made me feel so worthless. She would cheat on me then blame me for doing so, it was sick and unfair. I suffer with...
    l0velyinsides l0velyinsides 18-21, F 6 days ago

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    Surreal

    I remember his smell. The way his voice would waiver when he was on the verge of one of his episodes . I tried to stay out of his way. I remember the last time he put his hands on me. He had ran through all his usual insults. Fat, ugly , disgusting, imperfect, lazy, and whatever...
    ALL4SMILES ALL4SMILES 31-35, F 11 Responses Nov 18, 2012

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    I was once married to a very abusive &

    controlling man who almost took my sanity & made me believe that without him I could do nothing. I never saw his evil nature until the latter part of our marriage. He was the most charismatic, Christian man one will ever know. My family had not talked to me for a while. They had...
    pebbles83 pebbles83 31-35, F 2 Responses Jul 2

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    I've Been In Two Abusive Relationships.

    You would think I would learn from the 1st abusive relationship, but it really was a different situation the 2ND time. When I was 18yrs I became pregnant and chose to marry.  At that time we were both clean & sober.  On the night my child was born my...
    WarriorMom WarriorMom 51-55, F 21 Responses Dec 7, 2008

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    All throughout high school I was the "popular"

    girl. I never liked being in relationships & I certainly never paid any mind to any at the boys at my school. I was a bit of a "heart breaker". I need really cared about relationships then, but my senior year of high school I met a guy who was older then me..only by like 3 years...
    ElenaSC ElenaSC 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 30

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    I met this person a year ago in May.

    We met at a coffee shop and I took interest in him because he seemed so introverted but had a magnificent soul. We became friends quickly. I gave him my number and we began to chat. The time didn't matter; he did. In fact, the time we spent together was fulfilling in almost a...
    AddyAddyAddy AddyAddyAddy 22-25, F 5 Responses 5 days ago

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    I'm still disgusted with myself

    for letting you touch me. Some nights I skip showers because the thought of taking my clothes off, puts me into a breakdown. If I manage to get them off, I do everything I can to make sure I don't catch a glimpse of my body.
    RobinPancakes RobinPancakes 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 22

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    Can It Get Any Worse?

    Well Im a much different  person now then I was back when I was young and stupid. As many people put it! Or labled me. I had my first child when I was 15 years old. I dont regret that what so ever, he is the love and pride and joy of my life!! Hes gonna be 15 this...
    shy30 shy30 26-30, F 8 Responses May 7, 2007

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    Maybe my story can give hope to someone else.

    I was in a relationship with this handsome, smart, funny guy. Then one day that guy changed. Maybe not one day, maybe one week, or one year, I don't know, or maybe he was always the jerk he became I just didn't know it or see it because he hid it well. Well he started being...
    SamanthaSweet SamanthaSweet 22-25, F 7 Responses Jul 8

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    I have a pattern. I see the signs way too late.

    He tells me who he wants me to be. He starts commenting on my lifestyle in a nonthreatening way. Our relationship blooms and becomes all about respect. I live by his definition of self-respect and respect for him. He changes how I dress. I stop using my phone around him or he...
    Alylovespuppies Alylovespuppies 16-17, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    Why are men like it? You sleep with them

    and they think they own you! What was more, he was older than me, by ten years! I'm sure a seventeen years old woman is more mature then some, maybe most, twenty seven years old men!
    Paca24 Paca24 18-21, F 5 Responses Jul 7

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    5 years in an abusive relationship.

    14-19. I was told every day that I was worthless, had bones broken, humiliated on a regular basis, my friends and family turn against me and a gun pulled on me. Many years on and i haven't trusted anyone since.
    amandapanda88 amandapanda88 26-30, F 3 Responses Jun 29

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    And He'S 'Normal' Again

    The sleeping lion... Not sure where he will pounce next... So I won't move or make a sound, Stay hidden in the dark. Shhhhh.... My daughter, slow and soft, Don't startle the sleeping lion. He is not a loyal dog, His bite is worse than his bark. Shhhhh.... Scared wife, smile and...
    Munchycaterpillar Munchycaterpillar 31-35, F 2 Responses Apr 5, 2013

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    Yesterday while at work a friend came in

    for lunch. He sat at the counter We exchanged hellos and while taking his order in walks my ex. i could instantly feel my nerves kick into high gear. As i realized i have no choice but to face the man that instills more fear into me then the devil himself. My friend noticed and...
    sinistergirl sinistergirl 26-30, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I have experienced many crazy things,

    life is such a crazy place to be in and I have had a hard time taking my right path, it's in the choices I make that determine who I end up being, who it is I want to be and who I used to be. I was in such a dark place in my past but place of creation at my worst. Beaten by an...
    ShariAnnZak ShariAnnZak 46-50, F May 23

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    My Abuser Has My Children-"No big deal!

    " I told the father of my twins. He brought them back from a visit and told me to come out to the car and help bring in their stuff. Once we were out there he told me my little boys were worried because my current lover and would be Daddy of my youngest two children had 'hurt...
    BabylessMommy BabylessMommy 41-45, F 2 Responses Jun 28

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    I really don't want to talk too much about it

    but I married a controlling psychopath. He changed as soon as we were married and went on a spiral of abuse and menial torture. He was a drunk and would vanish for a day returning to take out his anger o me. I was raped, humiliated, degraded and beaten. The cycle of abuse...
    TamaraTheWorld TamaraTheWorld 26-30, F 7 Responses Jul 10

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    Im Thankful That Im Still Alive...

    I met my abusive ex when I was 19 and I was with him for 11 miserable years. I really should have read the warning signs early, I guess I know better now. To anyone new that he met he would come accross as the most charming funny outgoing individual you could meet. Behind closed...
    archangelgirl archangelgirl 31-35 8 Responses Jan 15, 2012

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    Insecurities

      i have not been in a physically abusive relationship, but it was a very mentally abusive relationship.. the scars were deep in my mind and heart.. i was with a girl and for the first 6 months we had the best time.. i love to laugh and make jokes and tell funny stories of...
    breastlover81 breastlover81 26-30, M 23 Responses Nov 9, 2012

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    Never Thought It Would Happen To Me

    Growing up i was strong willed an *** kicker lol. I met this guy at a bar when i was 21 that should have been a red flag there. I thought he was my way out of the life i had. Things were good until u got pregnant. After my dayghter was born was when my life became hell. It...
    holehearted79 holehearted79 31-35, F 40 Responses Feb 23, 2013

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    Been seeing my abusive ex again .

    It's only been 2 weeks and it's already getting bad. I'm always shaking and feel anxious when I'm not with him . It's like a drug as cliche as that sounds , I grow so codependent and a day without him feels like a year. I smiled at a guy I knew yesterday and he threw a fit and...
    leaom22 leaom22 22-25, F 4 Responses Jul 13

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    We need to notice Our actions speak louder

    than words aglance I give and give and give but baby you had your chance To move on with my life I need to move past your strife And try to pick up the pieces Of my pride Maybe one day you'll think of me And how it used to be us You are the reason I've found a disturbing lack...
    KristinaBeena KristinaBeena 18-21, F 1 Response May 23

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    jupsta jupsta 36-40, F Jun 15

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    Actually just got out of one last night.

    . Pretty proud of myself, he's been blowing up my phone & I haven't been giving him the time of day, now all I gotta do is have these bruises cleared up & he's memory will be completely gone.
    aaaxaaa aaaxaaa 18-21, F 23 Responses Jun 25

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    One of the hardest things I have ever been

    through and I've been through a lot. Growing up I dealt with a lot of emotional and physical abuse. I turned to the wrong things to deal with that which landed me with the wrong people. I thought he would protect me, turns out he was the one I needed protecting from.
    Rosalina94 Rosalina94 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 26

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    Ugly

    I was 15 years old when I met Pat* the first time. I wasn't blown over by his looks, or his charm. Looking back, I don't know exactly WHAT it was that attracted me to him. In truth, I suppose it was an exit strategy from my dysfunctional home. Pat* was 11 years my senior. Of...
    MissBehaviour MissBehaviour 36-40, F 14 Responses Mar 18, 2012

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    Young Love... Not

    When I was a junior in high school (so not too long ago) there was a reserved, ridiculously beautiful, private, and extremely quiet guy. I think the reason why I was so attracted to him is because I was so much like him. Minus the ridiculously beautiful part of course. So long...
    IntoYourArms IntoYourArms 70+, F 10 Responses Nov 16, 2013

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    I'm still with my abuser.

    Some of the things he's done to me caused me to have nightmares. I love him dearly and even though I know he is poisonous to my life I can't leave. Iv given him everything a person can give to another I'm currently pregnant with his first child. He still treats me like...
    Stiggyb Stiggyb 26-30, F 8 Responses 2 days ago

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    Didn't realize that I was in a controlling

    relationship until my daughter and other people recently told me. I always assumed controlling was when someone told you "you can't to this", "you can't wear that" but instead I was in a relationship where if I wanted to go somewhere and he didn't then he would pout and get mad...
    southbaylady southbaylady 36-40, F 3 Responses Jun 23

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    I met with my son's father a

    while back, must be nearly a year now, and I didn't really know him all that well, so we went on a few dates and I let him into my home. He didn't know he has a son, and I wasn't yet prepared to tell him. He started getting forceful when it came to his intimate desires, and I...
    timeline112 timeline112 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 30

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    Not My Fault!

    No one really knows about my relationship life around me. Once in a while I'll tell a friend...but other than that I keep it from my family...so it was quite hard for me when I found out the one I was seeing was becoming quite controlling and physical. I never really noticed it...
    raevynvelcros raevynvelcros 22-25, F 5 Responses Oct 25, 2008

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    I Have Been In Several Abusive Relationships.

    I came from an abusive family so when I became an adult I didn't know any different. I have been in abusive relationships or marriages over the past years. I want to tell a story about one abusive marriage I was in: I was pretty much to the point were I couldn't take it anymore...
    butterfly628 butterfly628 51-55, F 3 Responses Feb 12, 2011

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    Holding On

    Why do I keep holding oneven though I know it will never beWhy do I keep holding onwhen what we have is killing meWhy do I keep holding onwishing the dream were still aliveWhy do I keep holding onrealizing our love will never surviveWhy do I keep holding onto the feeling I have...
    texastomboy texastomboy 36-40, F 6 Responses Jul 3, 2012

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    Worthless

    I was in an abusive relationship for 3 years. Me and Jacob had been together for 5 years but it wasnt until the third year that he beat me. He had a temper and he had hit me a few times... but it was nothing compared to when he beat me. He has put me in the hospital 7 times. He...
    sucknswallow sucknswallow 22-25, F 17 Responses Mar 23, 2012

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    I just got out of an abusive relationship a

    month ago and now I'm in a new relationship but I'm so scared cuz of what's happened in the past
    Jaymerz97 Jaymerz97 16-17, F 4 Responses Jun 25

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    Abusive Relationships Suck The Life Out Of You.

    I am getting out of mine, away from the 'narcissistic B******* who has many many times over 24 years made my life hell, and is abusive to our children at times also, they are young and don't deserve it. Everyone, well most people think he's such a nice easy going guy. He has...
    wishwing wishwing 41-45, F 11 Responses Mar 12, 2010

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    Walking On Eggshells

    When I was in my late teens to my early tweenties I dated this guy for a few years on and off. Needless to say from the groups title, the relationship was rocky. In the beginning he was very charming. When he would talk it was as if I was the only person in the room. We were...
    an2012 an2012 22-25, F 3 Responses Nov 22, 2012

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    His name was Jim. I was 16

    and he was 21. I lost my virginity to him. And even though we weren't in a committed relationship we were off and on for over a year. He was a complete @$$! He would always grab me by the throat in a fight or slap me. He treated me like a slave! I hated him but I wanted him. I...
    wheelsxoxo wheelsxoxo 22-25, F 3 Responses 3 days ago

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    THIS IS A REAL AND LEGITMATE FORM OF ABUSE.

    I struggle with the fact that not only was my ex emotionally abusive, but so was my own father. I can legitimately say that I am ****** up because of it. I can't trust anyone, I can't ever shake the feeling that I'm going to be left alone with no one to love. I cannot get rid...
    cemarie128 cemarie128 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 23

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    i have been with my abusive husband

    for 21years from the age of 16 (he was then 18). I am sharing my story in the hope that it will help you if you are facing something like this, that there is always a way to get out, it is scary but there is hope. For a long time he was so charming and he wanted to see me...
    KirstyF KirstyF 36-40, F 5 Responses Dec 13, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    I cheated on my husband, then i left him. He was mean, and I'm tired of repeating the details, but by mean I intend to say that he fits into many of the descriptors of an...
    Regrets472 Regrets472 26-30, F 2 Responses 9 hrs ago