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I Have Been In An Abusive Relationship

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 8,399 People

    I'm still with my abuser.

    Some of the things he's done to me caused me to have nightmares. I love him dearly and even though I know he is poisonous to my life I can't leave. Iv given him everything a person can give to another I'm currently pregnant with his first child. He still treats me like...
    Stiggyb Stiggyb 26-30, F 11 Responses Jul 20

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    Be strong. Get though hardships

    even if it's horrible. Once you hit rock bottom the only way is up. I have love for all of you and I'm sorry for your situations. Xoxoxoxo Don't end your life. You weren't brought into the world by your troubles don't let it kill you. I'll pray for you if you want. Just let me...
    sashakimi4 sashakimi4 13-15, F 1 Response a week ago

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    Holding On

    Why do I keep holding oneven though I know it will never beWhy do I keep holding onwhen what we have is killing meWhy do I keep holding onwishing the dream were still aliveWhy do I keep holding onrealizing our love will never surviveWhy do I keep holding onto the feeling I have...
    texastomboy texastomboy 36-40, F 6 Responses Jul 3, 2012

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    I'm still disgusted with myself

    for letting you touch me. Some nights I skip showers because the thought of taking my clothes off, puts me into a breakdown. If I manage to get them off, I do everything I can to make sure I don't catch a glimpse of my body.
    RobinPancakes RobinPancakes 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 22

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    1 head injury, 1 first degree burn on my left

    foot, a scar on my right cheek
    suenightingale suenightingale 31-35, F 12 Responses Aug 10

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    Never Thought It Would Happen To Me

    Growing up i was strong willed an *** kicker lol. I met this guy at a bar when i was 21 that should have been a red flag there. I thought he was my way out of the life i had. Things were good until u got pregnant. After my dayghter was born was when my life became hell. It...
    holehearted79 holehearted79 31-35, F 39 Responses Feb 23, 2013

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    His name was Jim. I was 16

    and he was 21. I lost my virginity to him. And even though we weren't in a committed relationship we were off and on for over a year. He was a complete @$$! He would always grab me by the throat in a fight or slap me. He treated me like a slave! I hated him but I wanted him. I...
    wheelsxoxo wheelsxoxo 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 18

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    I have lost myself completely in this

    relationship. I want to be happy, and outgoing like I was before I met you. You took away my friends and family from me, and now I feel like you are all I have. Now you are all I have to rely on. I can't walk away from you, and you kill me more and more each day.
    cbaremans cbaremans 16-17, F 3 Responses 3 days ago

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    I've Grown, I've Survived , I'm Happy

    I had an affair with a "man" (more like a monster), in my early 20's that lasted about 5 years, it was an on and off thing.  That's how most abusive relationships are anyway. The first time he hit me was when I was driving.  We were late to an appointment and...
    golddustwoman golddustwoman 36-40, F 11 Responses Sep 11, 2008

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    I really don't want to talk too much about it

    but I married a controlling psychopath. He changed as soon as we were married and went on a spiral of abuse and menial torture. He was a drunk and would vanish for a day returning to take out his anger o me. I was raped, humiliated, degraded and beaten. The cycle of abuse...
    deleted deleted 26-30 12 Responses Jul 10

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    i don't like being touch.

    in pictures, i am very aware of my distance with others. it started with narc mother and continue with abusive boyfriend. we were walking next to each other when suddenly he would hold my hand and twist it. at first, i was shocked and in pain. i try to pull my hand and as i...
    fien fien 26-30, F 1 Response Aug 21

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    Why are men like it? You sleep with them

    and they think they own you! What was more, he was older than me, by ten years! I'm sure a seventeen years old woman is more mature then some, maybe most, twenty seven years old men!
    Paca24 Paca24 18-21, F 5 Responses Jul 7

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    I Have Been In Several Abusive Relationships.

    I came from an abusive family so when I became an adult I didn't know any different. I have been in abusive relationships or marriages over the past years. I want to tell a story about one abusive marriage I was in: I was pretty much to the point were I couldn't take it anymore...
    butterfly628 butterfly628 51-55, F 3 Responses Feb 12, 2011

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    I am currently married

    and unsure if I am in an abusive relationship or if I am just difficult to deal with. My husband has never hit me, but the things that he says to me and makes me feel makes me question why he does it if he "loves" me. His family took me in just shy of my 18th birthday and we...
    Gonzales96 Gonzales96 18-21, F 6 Responses Aug 16

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    Worthless

    I was in an abusive relationship for 3 years. Me and Jacob had been together for 5 years but it wasnt until the third year that he beat me. He had a temper and he had hit me a few times... but it was nothing compared to when he beat me. He has put me in the hospital 7 times. He...
    sucknswallow sucknswallow 22-25, F 17 Responses Mar 23, 2012

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    Actually, this wasn't just an abusive

    relationship, he even raped me. I'm scared to say that but he wasn't charged because of multiple things. 1. They said he didn't rape me because he said I wanted it. 2. Because he didn't take my virginity but did damage down there. 3. Because I was willing to hangout with an...
    Cassadilla1822 Cassadilla1822 18-21, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    I met this person a year ago in May.

    We met at a coffee shop and I took interest in him because he seemed so introverted but had a magnificent soul. We became friends quickly. I gave him my number and we began to chat. The time didn't matter; he did. In fact, the time we spent together was fulfilling in almost a...
    AddyAddyAddy AddyAddyAddy 18-21, F 5 Responses Jul 16

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    I got a letter today from my ex.

    Who i have a restraining order against. Its not signed and its typed but the words are his. It read... Libby, I've tried talking to u in person. I understand that you want nothing to do with me. I can't say i blame u. I just need you to know. Im getting help. I don't want to...
    sinistergirl sinistergirl 26-30, F 2 Responses Jul 25

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    I have thought about posting my story

    but often chicken out maybe out if fear and selfishness, but if anything I say could help another woman that is what I need and want to do. I was in an abusive relationship with my high school sweetheart but it wasn't always like that at all! All growing up there was a bound...
    Chicgeekgal Chicgeekgal 22-25, F 2 Responses Aug 17

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    Im Thankful That Im Still Alive...

    I met my abusive ex when I was 19 and I was with him for 11 miserable years. I really should have read the warning signs early, I guess I know better now. To anyone new that he met he would come accross as the most charming funny outgoing individual you could meet. Behind closed...
    archangelgirl archangelgirl 31-35 8 Responses Jan 15, 2012

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    Bringing relationships to completion

    and walking away with loving detachment: exerpt from Ch. 18 of Oneness Acceptance, unconditionally, of whatever has been presented, without the need to try to change it, and without the need to fit it into the context of ones own system of values, constitutes the recipe for...
    findmeholdmeloveme findmeholdmeloveme 18-21 4 Responses Aug 7

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    Insecurities

      i have not been in a physically abusive relationship, but it was a very mentally abusive relationship.. the scars were deep in my mind and heart.. i was with a girl and for the first 6 months we had the best time.. i love to laugh and make jokes and tell funny stories of...
    breastlover81 breastlover81 26-30, M 23 Responses Nov 9, 2012

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    I met my ex boyfriend at a job we

    once both worked at & I fell in love. It was perfect, so I thought. After 6 months I moved in with him because my mom and I didn't get along. Everything was fine, a few months passed and that's when it happened he pushed me really hard into the wall and as time passed it just...
    sagalvan1 sagalvan1 22-25, F 3 Responses a week ago

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    My husband is verbally

    and emotionally abusive. When he is angry, which is often, he tells me he hates me, he's disgusted by me, he's not attracted to me, he's ashamed of me, he's only staying with me because of our daughter, etc. he says if I leave him he will leave and never see our daughter again...
    Gals5 Gals5 31-35, F 4 Responses 5 days ago

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    He used to control me.

    If I would talk to a guy friend then suddenly I was cheating on him. He would accuse me of faking my asthma, that was the one time I stood up for myself. A minute after I was able to get my breath back, I walked up to him and punched him. After that he would break up with me at...
    cmdoran cmdoran 18-21, F 6 Responses Jul 28

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    We all have scars, I'm nothing special.

    I neither need help nor support. I don't ask for pity or advice. I understand the pain in your eyes before I see your bruises. I have been used as an ashtray, a séx toy, a punch bag. The scars are on the outside for all to see. But hear this; those of us that have been...
    JaneBloodyAusten JaneBloodyAusten 31-35, F 6 Responses Jul 28

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    Take a Look At My Girlfriend...

    I was 15, she was 17. You don't hear about abuse in gay relationships much, but there you are. I had never been with a girl before, and I was so in love and so sure I could never feel the same way again with anyone else. I stayed two years. I will never be the same person. I...
    ParselyTree ParselyTree 16-18, F 4 Responses Feb 20, 2008

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    Walking On Eggshells

    When I was in my late teens to my early tweenties I dated this guy for a few years on and off. Needless to say from the groups title, the relationship was rocky. In the beginning he was very charming. When he would talk it was as if I was the only person in the room. We were...
    an2012 an2012 22-25, F 3 Responses Nov 22, 2012

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    Everyone kept telling me

    that I was so lucky to be with such a lovely guy and that he was so gentle and so nice. "Wow you're so lucky your first boyfriend is so nice" . I don't know why I didn't say it sooner . That he wasn't all he appeared to be. My whole family loved him. I know it's been over for...
    xosecretidentityxo xosecretidentityxo 16-17, F 5 Responses Aug 5

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    Maybe my story can give hope to someone else.

    I was in a relationship with this handsome, smart, funny guy. Then one day that guy changed. Maybe not one day, maybe one week, or one year, I don't know, or maybe he was always the jerk he became I just didn't know it or see it because he hid it well. Well he started being...
    SamanthaSweet SamanthaSweet 22-25, F 7 Responses Jul 8

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    Surreal

    I remember his smell. The way his voice would waiver when he was on the verge of one of his episodes . I tried to stay out of his way. I remember the last time he put his hands on me. He had ran through all his usual insults. Fat, ugly , disgusting, imperfect, lazy, and whatever...
    ALL4SMILES ALL4SMILES 31-35, F 12 Responses Nov 18, 2012

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    I have a pattern. I see the signs way too late.

    He tells me who he wants me to be. He starts commenting on my lifestyle in a nonthreatening way. Our relationship blooms and becomes all about respect. I live by his definition of self-respect and respect for him. He changes how I dress. I stop using my phone around him or he...
    Alylovespuppies Alylovespuppies 16-17, F 2 Responses Jul 18

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    I met my ex-husband at the age of 17.

    I never saw the red flags, mainly because I endured abuse growing up. I thought it was pretty normal when he got jealous of my friends, mad when he thought I did something wrong, and even ok when he broke things around the house. But with time, like every abusive relationship...
    lexy82 lexy82 31-35, F 3 Responses Jun 30

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    Young Love... Not

    When I was a junior in high school (so not too long ago) there was a reserved, ridiculously beautiful, private, and extremely quiet guy. I think the reason why I was so attracted to him is because I was so much like him. Minus the ridiculously beautiful part of course. So long...
    IntoYourArms IntoYourArms 70+, F 10 Responses Nov 16, 2013

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    Actually just got out of one last night.

    . Pretty proud of myself, he's been blowing up my phone & I haven't been giving him the time of day, now all I gotta do is have these bruises cleared up & he's memory will be completely gone.
    aaaxaaa aaaxaaa 18-21, F 25 Responses Jun 25

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    And if you are, then I hope you are smart

    enough to recognize it so you can do something about it. I'm a pretty passive guy and my tolerance for "****" is very high but I deluded myself into being in love with this girl. I couldn't keep dealing with being stepped on and treated like I was useless in her life. I know I'm...
    Zolaugh Zolaugh 18-21, M 1 Response 5 days ago

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    Abusive Relationships Suck The Life Out Of You.

    I am getting out of mine, away from the 'narcissistic B******* who has many many times over 24 years made my life hell, and is abusive to our children at times also, they are young and don't deserve it. Everyone, well most people think he's such a nice easy going guy. He has...
    wishwing wishwing 41-45, F 12 Responses Mar 12, 2010

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    He would cry and I would literally wipe every

    tear . I would cry and get laughed at and mocked and told I sounded like a man . Why didn't he care
    leaom22 leaom22 22-25, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    We fight every morning in class,

    she always ******* puts me down, she makes fun of me all the time, she yells at me everytime I complain, she yells and begs me to get her way everytime we go out to eat together with my family, she makes me feel retarded and makes fun of me for it, yells at me and puts down my...
    RainbowPastel RainbowPastel 16-17, F a week ago

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    Hush Sleepy Lion

    Hush sleepy lion, our cub is asleep where she lay, Roars the lion, Shudders the prey. ROARS the lion, Cowers the prey. ROARS THE LION! Prey squeals and shys away. Quiet now sleepy lion, You have had a long day. Sleep angry lion, Don't hurt your prey. I meant no harm, I've...
    Munchycaterpillar Munchycaterpillar 31-35, F 2 Responses Sep 30, 2013

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    I want to leave my partner,

    but he's threatening to commit suicide if I do
    mw2405 mw2405 26-30, F 8 Responses Jul 28

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    I was married for 10 years,

    my ex was verbally and physically abusive. He stopped working for the last two years,and I was the main support of the house. He would always accused me of cheating on him, he would smoke weed all the time. And spend his money buying weed. He would go to church 5 times a week, I...
    liza0324 liza0324 26-30, F 3 Responses 3 days ago

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    i have been with my abusive husband

    for 21years from the age of 16 (he was then 18). I am sharing my story in the hope that it will help you if you are facing something like this, that there is always a way to get out, it is scary but there is hope. For a long time he was so charming and he wanted to see me...
    KirstyF KirstyF 36-40, F 5 Responses Dec 13, 2013

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    For all of those wondering

    if they are in an unhealthy relationship.50 Signs You're in a Bad Relationship
    findmeholdmeloveme findmeholdmeloveme 18-21 3 Responses Aug 1

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    And He'S 'Normal' Again

    The sleeping lion... Not sure where he will pounce next... So I won't move or make a sound, Stay hidden in the dark. Shhhhh.... My daughter, slow and soft, Don't startle the sleeping lion. He is not a loyal dog, His bite is worse than his bark. Shhhhh.... Scared wife, smile and...
    Munchycaterpillar Munchycaterpillar 31-35, F 2 Responses Apr 5, 2013

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    My sophomore year in hight school I dated a guy

    from Chile. We wore introduced through some friends and we hit it off soon after. A month and some time passed and I noticed he was acting a little violent. At fist I thought it was because he was stressed because of his lacrosse games but as time passed on, He started treating...
    KariAlex KariAlex 18-21, F 4 Responses Aug 5

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    Yesterday while at work a friend came in

    for lunch. He sat at the counter We exchanged hellos and while taking his order in walks my ex. i could instantly feel my nerves kick into high gear. As i realized i have no choice but to face the man that instills more fear into me then the devil himself. My friend noticed and...
    sinistergirl sinistergirl 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 18

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    I've Been In Two Abusive Relationships.

    You would think I would learn from the 1st abusive relationship, but it really was a different situation the 2ND time. When I was 18yrs I became pregnant and chose to marry.  At that time we were both clean & sober.  On the night my child was born my...
    WarriorMom WarriorMom 51-55, F 21 Responses Dec 7, 2008

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    Just found out that the man

    that abused me and ruined 10 years of my life is getting married ( to the young girl he cheated on me with ) I secretly hope that he dies of a massive heart attack the day of his wedding...
    1973danielle 1973danielle 36-40, F 1 Response Jul 18

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    Oh man, I don't even know

    where to start... it is like living a never ending nightmare. I do not want your pity or you feeling sorry for me. It is what it is. I am married to a addicted man for 15 years now. We do have a business and 3 employees, each with wife and children, so if I get a divorce I will...
    annethruth annethruth 31-35, F 1 Response Jul 28

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    Can It Get Any Worse?

    Well Im a much different  person now then I was back when I was young and stupid. As many people put it! Or labled me. I had my first child when I was 15 years old. I dont regret that what so ever, he is the love and pride and joy of my life!! Hes gonna be 15 this...
    shy30 shy30 26-30, F 8 Responses May 7, 2007

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    I don't understand what I did wrong .

    he would come home angry from a long day at work and take it out on me . every little thing I did set him off , and he would hold me up against the wall and scream and slap . sometimes I tried to get away but he's stronger than me . way stronger than I am . and he uses it...
    abbyhh25 abbyhh25 16-17, F 6 Responses Jul 25

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    The best solution is to leave immediately at

    all costs. We live in an unjust world. The justice system won't protect you and if you try to take matters into your own hands you can end up in an upside down world. Then after you leave, evaluate the situation and learn from it. What are your deal breakers and red flags that...
    KeeWee812 KeeWee812 22-25, F 1 Response Jul 27

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