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I Have Been In An Abusive Relationship

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 12,439 People

    I'm still with my abuser.

    Some of the things he's done to me caused me to have nightmares. I love him dearly and even though I know he is poisonous to my life I can't leave. Iv given him everything a person can give to another I'm currently pregnant with his first child. He still treats me like...
    Stiggyb Stiggyb 26-30, F 10 Responses Jul 20, 2014

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    Hey guys I just thought I'd tell my story in

    the hope that I can inspire other people to get out of abusive relationships. It all started about 16 years ago when in school I met a girl, the second I layed eyes on her I fell head over heels in love with her. For 18 months we happily got together and all was well in my world...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Oct 6, 2014

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    My abusive boyfriend saved my live once,

    ironically. I overdosed, and the only thing that made me want to get up when I was too weak to move (too dehydrated/almost dead), was that I was afraid odd him being too angry and taking it out on me. Looking back on it, I realize how stupid that was of me.
    pikapower06 pikapower06 22-25, F 1 Response Jan 11

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    We all have scars, I'm nothing special.

    I neither need help nor support. I don't ask for pity or advice. I understand the pain in your eyes before I see your bruises. I have been used as an ashtray, a séx toy, a punch bag. The scars are on the outside for all to see. But hear this; those of us that have been...
    JaneBloodyAusten JaneBloodyAusten 31-35, F 6 Responses Jul 28, 2014

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    Can It Get Any Worse?

    Well Im a much different  person now then I was back when I was young and stupid. As many people put it! Or labled me. I had my first child when I was 15 years old. I dont regret that what so ever, he is the love and pride and joy of my life!! Hes gonna be 15 this...
    shy30 shy30 26-30, F 8 Responses May 7, 2007

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    Why are men like it? You sleep with them

    and they think they own you! What was more, he was older than me, by ten years! I'm sure a seventeen years old woman is more mature then some, maybe most, twenty seven years old men!
    Paca24 Paca24 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 7, 2014

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    I don't know what to do nomore,

    I been in this relationship for 3 year everyday things go worse and everything I do is not snough for him. I'm tired of crying and be depress, everything I do he always yell at me, push me, shock me, and beat the **** out me, when I complain at that Moment he said he didn't do...
    tweetyreck tweetyreck 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 4

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    Ages 16-19 I was in an emotionally

    and physically abusive relationship. While I've grown past and become a stronger person, I'm really struggling with dating now. I'm in a new relationship, and the guy for the most part has been amazing. But today I noticed some behavioral tendencies that were the same as my ex...
    BabyBlondeOne BabyBlondeOne 18-21, F 7 Responses Nov 2, 2014

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    I met my ex-husband at the age of 17.

    I never saw the red flags, mainly because I endured abuse growing up. I thought it was pretty normal when he got jealous of my friends, mad when he thought I did something wrong, and even ok when he broke things around the house. But with time, like every abusive relationship...
    lexy82 lexy82 31-35, F 3 Responses Jun 30, 2014

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    omg i cant take any of this anymore I am at my

    wits end. I actually joined this experience bc I wanted to get out of the totally unhealthy codependent controlling manipulating verbally abusive relationship with my so called non legal, non live in husband and father of my son....but now I am having to put that new year's goal...
    jaxpdx jaxpdx 41-45, F 2 Responses Jan 11

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    if anyone here needs someone to talk to,

    you can talk to me. I have been in 2 domestic relationships. one when I was 15 & the other when I was 19.
    isuhbelle isuhbelle 18-21, F 3 Responses Dec 26, 2014

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    I was in an abusive relationship.

    Actually I wAs in 2. People who have never lived through that have no idea the damage it does. People judge because a person stays in the relationship but please don't. Because until you have walked in that persons shoes you have no idea. I was blessed that the abuse was only...
    sml4 sml4 46-50, F 6 Responses Dec 22, 2014

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    I just typed up my whole experience

    and it got removed for not being appropriate. Don't have a section, dealing with abusive relationships, if I can't tell what happened to me. It's not like I said anything bad, I just said what I did to myself, what he did in response to me wanting to leave, and what he did once...
    kelly1796 kelly1796 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 13, 2014

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    So this is going to sound very stupid

    and naive but here goes. When I was 18 I thought I had found the love of my life. He was a few years older than me. We quickly moved in and he sweeped me off my feet and made me feel special. It didn't stay like that though. It started with the mind games and paranoia. In one...
    SomethingSignifigant SomethingSignifigant 18-21, F 3 Responses Jan 5

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    Young Love... Not

    When I was a junior in high school (so not too long ago) there was a reserved, ridiculously beautiful, private, and extremely quiet guy. I think the reason why I was so attracted to him is because I was so much like him. Minus the ridiculously beautiful part of course. So long...
    IntoYourArms IntoYourArms 70+, F 9 Responses Nov 16, 2013

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    When you hear or read about it,

    you always think you'd be the kind of girl to leave no matter what. When it actually happens, you realize it's not as black and white as you'd always thought it'd be. It's more like a million indistinct shades of gray. People can sit around and tell you to get out of the...
    marinadelmonroe marinadelmonroe 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 10

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    Insecurities

      i have not been in a physically abusive relationship, but it was a very mentally abusive relationship.. the scars were deep in my mind and heart.. i was with a girl and for the first 6 months we had the best time.. i love to laugh and make jokes and tell funny stories of...
    breastlover81 breastlover81 26-30, M 24 Responses Nov 9, 2012

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    Worthless

    I was in an abusive relationship for 3 years. Me and Jacob had been together for 5 years but it wasnt until the third year that he beat me. He had a temper and he had hit me a few times... but it was nothing compared to when he beat me. He has put me in the hospital 7 times. He...
    sucknswallow sucknswallow 22-25, F 16 Responses Mar 23, 2012

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    Things began normally.

    We were together a short while before his eating disorder became an issue. He would tell me in detail about his purges. I was so dependent on him I became a mess of stress and anxiety. I couldn't fathom him hurting himself. But I loved him, so I told him I could only handle it...
    gothstan gothstan 16-17, M 5 Responses Jan 2

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    I have had many issues

    and experiences with my husband. We have had so many ups and down and it has really affected my emotions. As of late, my husband went through a very difficult time. Being who I am, I was there as support for him. After this experience, my husband has realized how difficult it...
    sfm21 sfm21 22-25, F 1 Response Jan 3

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    Ugly

    I was 15 years old when I met Pat* the first time. I wasn't blown over by his looks, or his charm. Looking back, I don't know exactly WHAT it was that attracted me to him. In truth, I suppose it was an exit strategy from my dysfunctional home. Pat* was 11 years my senior. Of...
    MissBehaviour MissBehaviour 36-40, F 14 Responses Mar 18, 2012

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    I can't take it anymore my crazy abusive mother

    is calling me about every 30 mins to an hour all through the night on the phone trying to terrorize me. I eventually quit answering and now have blocked her number on all my phones. I would have done so sooner but I was worried about my dad who has had a traumatic brain injury...
    jaxpdx jaxpdx 41-45, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    It started three years ago.

    He was perfect, the sweetest. Then came our two year anniversary and downhill our relationship went. He hit me every chance he got, it got harder and harder to hide the black eyes and bruises on my body. I began to do bad in my classes, because he made me skip class to see him...
    ImperialGoddess76 ImperialGoddess76 18-21, F 14 Responses Jan 1

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    My ex used to yell at me

    and accuse me of infidelity. I really was faithful to the jerk. Then he started to hit me one day. I called the police. That is when he left me. That night I found a new guy and started sleeping around (a lot), by weeks end I had slept with four guys, Then the breakup of...
    BarbarBabcox BarbarBabcox 36-40, F 11 Responses Sep 24, 2014

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    Leave!!! that's all I can say,

    no matter is it a friend, mother, father, boyfriend... anyone.. leave.. while you can!!!
    1993atnomkal 1993atnomkal 18-21, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    Not so much Physically,

    but Emotionally and Mentally. Every time I had tried to break up with him he would threaten me, threaten to hurt himself, or make up some kind of sick story to try and scare me into not leaving him or taking him back. He wasn't kind toward me and often made fun of me and...
    HisKindredSpirit HisKindredSpirit 22-25, F 1 Response Jan 11

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    aaaaaaaaaah!!! hELP!

    !! IM FREAKIN OUT! STUPID PTSD!!! I WAS BEATEN. and choked. and put down daily. aaaah! help.
    amtired amtired 22-25 3 Responses Dec 27, 2014

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    I really don't want to talk too much about it

    but I married a controlling psychopath. He changed as soon as we were married and went on a spiral of abuse and menial torture. He was a drunk and would vanish for a day returning to take out his anger o me. I was raped, humiliated, degraded and beaten. The cycle of abuse...
    deleted deleted 26-30 10 Responses Jul 10, 2014

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    Maybe my story can give hope to someone else.

    I was in a relationship with this handsome, smart, funny guy. Then one day that guy changed. Maybe not one day, maybe one week, or one year, I don't know, or maybe he was always the jerk he became I just didn't know it or see it because he hid it well. Well he started being...
    SamanthaSweet SamanthaSweet 22-25, F 8 Responses Jul 8, 2014

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    Never Thought It Would Happen To Me

    Growing up i was strong willed an *** kicker lol. I met this guy at a bar when i was 21 that should have been a red flag there. I thought he was my way out of the life i had. Things were good until u got pregnant. After my dayghter was born was when my life became hell. It...
    holehearted79 holehearted79 31-35, F 43 Responses Feb 23, 2013

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    Take a Look At My Girlfriend...

    I was 15, she was 17. You don't hear about abuse in gay relationships much, but there you are. I had never been with a girl before, and I was so in love and so sure I could never feel the same way again with anyone else. I stayed two years. I will never be the same person. I...
    ParselyTree ParselyTree 16-18, F 4 Responses Feb 20, 2008

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    my ex was a danger. He nearly killed me.

    he talked about killing others. He isa psychopath.. it was creepy. i hate this crap he left behind. all he gave me was damage. and pain. Im suffering. aaaah help? i feel so weak. so weak. im freaking out.
    amtired amtired 22-25 2 Responses Dec 31, 2014

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    Well I got the news last night.

    My ex was arrested for attempted murder of his girlfriend. The exact same senario happened to me. I never expected to have mixed feelings about this. It's on the front page and the news and there is a part of me that wants to defend him. Then the other part that wants him to...
    sml4 sml4 46-50, F 4 Responses 5 days ago

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    I've Been In Two Abusive Relationships.

    You would think I would learn from the 1st abusive relationship, but it really was a different situation the 2ND time. When I was 18yrs I became pregnant and chose to marry.  At that time we were both clean & sober.  On the night my child was born my...
    WarriorMom WarriorMom 51-55, F 21 Responses Dec 7, 2008

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    He had always made me happy,

    I remember when we first met - I was one of those who believed in love at first sight. After dating for six months he started to become very aggressive towards me and I always believed it was my fault. Then one night I came home from work and he called me saying he had a few...
    deleted deleted 26-30 8 Responses Sep 11, 2014

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    I have been married to my husband

    for ten years, he was diagnosed about five years ago as bipolar but refuses to get help. He is very verbally abusive and I cannot take it any longer. I have several health problems that cause me to be in chronic pain but he cannot control his outbursts even when I'm hurting.. He...
    greengeenie greengeenie 41-45, F 4 Responses Jan 11

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    i have been with my abusive husband

    for 21years from the age of 16 (he was then 18). I am sharing my story in the hope that it will help you if you are facing something like this, that there is always a way to get out, it is scary but there is hope. For a long time he was so charming and he wanted to see me...
    KirstyF KirstyF 36-40, F 5 Responses Dec 13, 2013

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    Everyone kept telling me

    that I was so lucky to be with such a lovely guy and that he was so gentle and so nice. "Wow you're so lucky your first boyfriend is so nice" . I don't know why I didn't say it sooner . That he wasn't all he appeared to be. My whole family loved him. I know it's been over for...
    xosecretidentityxo xosecretidentityxo 16-17, F 5 Responses Aug 5, 2014

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    Really rough day. Was in tears

    and now just emotionally defeated and depleted but I need to pick myself up, dust myself off and try again tomorrow...the eternal optimist:) I need to set up counseling. My ex husband is being a jerk because I'm dating one of his friends and he just can't get over it although he...
    Messybutbeautiful Messybutbeautiful 31-35 3 Responses Dec 30, 2014

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    Its been over a month

    since the last time i seen or heard my husbands voice at all.. Ive been cut off.. which in a way a lot easier to cope with our seperation (now permanent).. There has been cheating involved that he wont confess to.. continuing lies.. emotional abuse, verbal abuse and some...
    stuckNWEbbz stuckNWEbbz 26-30, F 2 Responses Jan 16

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    A long time ago I was married to an abusive man.

    When we first met he would throw his jacket over a puddle so I didn't have to walk in muddy water. He focused on my every need. We married 9 months after meeting. The abuse started as soon as the wedding was completed. He didn't even come home for 3 days after the wedding...
    yooper01 yooper01 56-60, F 6 Responses Nov 8, 2014

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    I have been married 14 years to a man

    who is like a ticking time bomb.In those years he had been arrested 3 times for domestic battery and every time I forgave him. First time he drank too much and comes from a violent alcoholic family. He is a angry drunk. He tried to choke me in 2002 2 years after we were married...
    cruisebaby53 cruisebaby53 61-65, F 3 Responses 3 days ago

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    Seems as tho I'm starting out the new year

    single. I knew this guy wasn't treating me right either. We had an argument, just a stupid disagreement over plans and he resorted to cutting me down on a personal level verbally attacking me much like my ex did:(
    Messybutbeautiful Messybutbeautiful 31-35 2 Responses Jan 1

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    I've been in physically,

    mentally, emotionally, spiritually relationships stemming from my parents to boyfriends. I was physically abusive to my boyfriends too. If they hit me I'd hit them back. Never ends pretty. I have never had a "normal" relationship! I've only had physical relationships! EVER...
    christinelove69 christinelove69 41-45, F 4 Responses Dec 27, 2014

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    when i met my ex last March,

    i honestly thought we were everything we both were looking for. now all my friends tell me the things that were red flags to them. to this day, he's still never met any of my friends or family except my mom when she helped me kick him out once. in the beginning, he liked to buy...
    burntoutstars burntoutstars 26-30, F 1 Response Jan 12

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    About 5-6 years ago I was in a very abusive

    relationship with a man. He and I met on a dating website and met the same day. He lived in my city. When we met, he was told I was a huge family person. Soon within months of being with this jerk face, he starts to "weed" me away from my family. All of a sudden it had to...
    Happywife2015 Happywife2015 36-40, F Jan 11

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    3 years ago, I was in an extremely abusive

    relationship. After making sure he was out of my life, I repressed the memories. Unfortunately that led to me having flashbacks & nightmares nearly every night. I just want to forget about the abuse and to forget about him, but it's nearly impossible. I'm at the point where I...
    untamedx3heart untamedx3heart 22-25, F 3 Responses Dec 27, 2014

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    Well my new bf is showing the same signs of

    being possessive and controlling and playing mind games as my ex. I'm not having it so we aren't even talking and may possibly be over. And now that same ex that caused so much heartache but is trying to show he changed, is messaging me trying to get me back. Is there any chance...
    Messybutbeautiful Messybutbeautiful 31-35 6 Responses Dec 27, 2014

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    I Have Been In Several Abusive Relationships.

    I came from an abusive family so when I became an adult I didn't know any different. I have been in abusive relationships or marriages over the past years. I want to tell a story about one abusive marriage I was in: I was pretty much to the point were I couldn't take it anymore...
    butterfly628 butterfly628 51-55, F 3 Responses Feb 12, 2011

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    Today I was reminded of how completely trapped

    I used to feel; but how I didn't realize just how trapped I felt until I was out. Today, a rather new friend and I were watching a news story on the Ray Rice incident, and how an ESPN anchor got suspended over calling the commissioner a liar. She then began to tell me about...
    lovelyss lovelyss 22-25, F Sep 25, 2014

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    Im Thankful That Im Still Alive...

    I met my abusive ex when I was 19 and I was with him for 11 miserable years. I really should have read the warning signs early, I guess I know better now. To anyone new that he met he would come accross as the most charming funny outgoing individual you could meet. Behind closed...
    archangelgirl archangelgirl 31-35 9 Responses Jan 15, 2012