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I Have Been In An Abusive Relationship

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 18,038 People

    It's been five years

    since our divorce. Five years since I was supposed to be free of him. Tell that to the flashbacks. I'll be fine and then I'll see or hear or read something... or nothing... and I'll be pulled back in, like no time has passed at all. Yesterday, I remembered again how we had...
    Elspet Elspet 26-30, F 4 Responses Jan 8

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    Insecurities

      i have not been in a physically abusive relationship, but it was a very mentally abusive relationship.. the scars were deep in my mind and heart.. i was with a girl and for the first 6 months we had the best time.. i love to laugh and make jokes and tell funny stories of...
    breastlover81 breastlover81 26-30, M 23 Responses Nov 9, 2012

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    I'm still with my abuser.

    Some of the things he's done to me caused me to have nightmares. I love him dearly and even though I know he is poisonous to my life I can't leave. Iv given him everything a person can give to another I'm currently pregnant with his first child. He still treats me like...
    Stiggyb Stiggyb 26-30, F 9 Responses Jul 20, 2014

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    In some weird way I know you meant well.

    Even after my concussion. Even after feeling your relentless force. It's just that when you got really passionate about something you would sometimes turn into a monster. As I did. I'm not making excuses for you, I know the severity of the situation and I know that you took...
    wingedjaguar wingedjaguar 22-25, F 6 Responses Aug 24, 2015

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    He won't let me do anything

    and makes me talk to him all day or he pulls the sad depressed suicidal card... Help
    GeekiLizard GeekiLizard 18-21, F 7 Responses Jan 18

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    this is a poem I wrote about women being abused

    and I hope you like it this isn't a relationship it's a hostage situation silences screams louder then a fat lady sings hands tied he lied, he didn't love you in the first place you can't break free continue to send out your silent screams until you're seen your life...
    luv2pee23 luv2pee23 18-21, F 1 day ago

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    I've never really talked about it except to

    people I'm closest to, so here goes nothin. When we started dating he treated me like I was precious and gave me attention i had never had before. It made me feel great and it didn't hurt that he was gorgeous. But the first time I realized something was up was 6 months in when...
    SnowWhite87 SnowWhite87 26-30, F 4 Responses Jan 27

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    Tonight he threw my dinner at the wall.

    I have been snowed in without access to my car as it is BURIED in snow. On my boyfriends way home I had asked him to pick up something from the pizza place for me which is right in front of his subway stop, he would have to carry it home about two blocks. He said no, I said...
    dcp1058 dcp1058 26-30, F 5 Responses Jan 27

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    Actually just got out of one last night.

    . Pretty proud of myself, he's been blowing up my phone & I haven't been giving him the time of day, now all I gotta do is have these bruises cleared up & he's memory will be completely gone.
    aaaxaaa aaaxaaa 18-21, F 24 Responses Jun 25, 2014

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    While growing up I was verbally abused

    and physically abused. maybe thats why all my exs were drawn to me. they all were abusive also. One reason I fear people these days.
    Michelle41011 Michelle41011 41-45, T 4 Responses Jul 19, 2015

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    It must be hard living like a parasite .

    .. Always taking... never giving. That's what you are and that's what you'll always be. I hate myself for letting you destroy my spark, the spark that makes me want to get up in the morning, the spark that kept me feeling alive and confident, fearless , accepted and loved. I...
    Misunderstoodlady Misunderstoodlady 26-30, F 8 Responses Nov 19, 2015

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    A long time ago I was married to an abusive man.

    When we first met he would throw his jacket over a puddle so I didn't have to walk in muddy water. He focused on my every need. We married 9 months after meeting. The abuse started as soon as the wedding was completed. He didn't even come home for 3 days after the wedding...
    yooper01 yooper01 56-60, F 9 Responses Nov 8, 2014

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    It hurts mostly everyday I still get emotional

    I can still picture everything that happened I can still feel her hands banging against my head. How the first month's it was just the beginning. I was in an abusive relationship I was hurt emotionally and physically. At first she just hit me and I would tell her to stop and she...
    Introvertedchild18 Introvertedchild18 18-21 2 Responses Feb 1

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    Today, I had another conversation with my mom.

    Yes, I love her. Yes, she was there and saw (all of the abuse of me and my siblings.) Hard for her. She spends her days trying to be the most wonderful human on earth. She is. For me, she has repented. I forgive you, sweet mama. I was always your greatest protector. I...
    frspch frspch 51-55, F 6 Responses Jan 25

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    I once knew a girl in the years of my

    youth With eyes like the summer: all beauty and truth But in the morning I fled, left a note and it read “Someday you will be loved” And I cannot pretend that I felt any regret ‘Cause each broken heart will eventually mend Just as the blood runs red down the needle and...
    thelonliestrose thelonliestrose 22-25, F 1 Response Jan 5

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    I dated a diagnosed psychopath.

    He showered me with love and affection and showed so much interest in me from the start that I was smitten. Also he was very charming and handsome. He was very strong and muscular and that was attractive to me because he seemed strong and protective too. But then it turned...
    AnonymousKCQ AnonymousKCQ 22-25, F 6 Responses Feb 1

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    I've been having flashbacks lately.

    And it's hard to deal with when you have no one to talk to, but after being isolated in the relationship for 4 years you think I'd be use to it, but now I just feel lonelier.
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Jan 13

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    Everything between us started off perfect.

    It was too good to be true of course. 1 month into our relationship he cheated on me. I forgave him like an idiot of course. He seemed really sorry, i believed it. When i refused to sleep with him he yelled at me and would just say horrible things. Months of emotional abuse...
    v1ct0rtilla v1ct0rtilla 18-21, F 4 Responses Jan 30

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    Young Love... Not

    When I was a junior in high school (so not too long ago) there was a reserved, ridiculously beautiful, private, and extremely quiet guy. I think the reason why I was so attracted to him is because I was so much like him. Minus the ridiculously beautiful part of course. So long...
    IntoYourArms IntoYourArms 70+, F 9 Responses Nov 16, 2013

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    I have been through two abusive relationships,

    I am out now and safe. I want to tell everyone out there that no abuse is exceptable no matter if it's emotional physical or sexaul. Men get abused aswell it's not as common but it does happen. I had a lovely partner for a while he was gentle kind and thoughtful, he had and...
    chockywhockydoda chockywhockydoda 51-55, F 1 Response Jan 27

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    people ask why did you stay,

    l guess they don't know how trapped you feel, how worthless they make you feel, what a failure in life you feel, the embarrassment of saying to your family
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Sep 11, 2015

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    ...and I still am. I want to leave,

    but my parents have kicked me out of their house, and his home is the only place I can go. I am stuck here. Im about to buy a car and live out of it at this point.
    neonslug neonslug 18-21, F 5 Responses 17 hrs ago

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    I just need some advice

    which I feel I pretty much know the answer to : My boyfriend suggesting that I care about money more than I care about my son is emotional abuse, no ?? My boyfriend telling me that he only buys me gifts so I won't tell at him My boyfriend telling me I'm not as strong as I...
    dcp1058 dcp1058 26-30, F 2 Responses Jan 14

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    The thing about these abusers.

    .. They always deny their abuse. Or they minimize or they change the story, rewrite history, have selective amnesia and gaslight. Dealing with these personality disordered people with custody of your children sucks. CPS is involved because of his abusive nature. They are...
    BijouBlue BijouBlue 36-40, F 18 Responses Jul 8, 2015

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    Tonight I shine a light.

    The darkness of abuse has kept in a cycle I no longer want. My father was brutal. Physical and mental. How we all (my siblings) grew to be the strong, giving, and empathetic people we are is truly amazing. My earliest memories are of belts and bruises. My little brother...
    frspch frspch 51-55, F 7 Responses Jan 7

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    The guy I was with recently dumped me

    and I realized that all the significant, romantic relationships I have been in have been abusive in some form. They've either flat out abused me - emotionally or sexually - or they've taken advantage of who I am as a person. Forgiveness, patience, kindness, hasn't gotten me very...
    terrywill15 terrywill15 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 29

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    It wasn't physical abuse

    but mental. And for years I didn't think it would even be considered abuse or even be important. But I have recently learned that it's still abuse and is just as important. I want to share my story to inform others and make it aware. To help others see the signs of abuse. If...
    ashuriiNikooru ashuriiNikooru 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 19

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    Never Thought It Would Happen To Me

    Growing up i was strong willed an *** kicker lol. I met this guy at a bar when i was 21 that should have been a red flag there. I thought he was my way out of the life i had. Things were good until u got pregnant. After my dayghter was born was when my life became hell. It...
    WhisperingEchoes WhisperingEchoes 36-40, F 43 Responses Feb 23, 2013

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    He was my first love.

    He was very mean to me mentally but he definitely went too far physically. He hit me in the mouth if I said something he didn't like. If I knew he was about to hit me I would hit him or try to defend myself. I'm not a weak little b*tch who is going to sit there and take his...
    DeIuxedEdition DeIuxedEdition 18-21, F 17 Responses Nov 4, 2015

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    For my girls I left. Not wanting them to think

    that it's ever ok to stay in a bad relationship. For my girls I wanted them to know and see the error of my choices. Never ever did I want them to find themselves in the same situation. My daughter tells me that she's struggling in her current relationship. I ask her what...
    snowberry75 snowberry75 36-40, F 8 Responses Jan 11

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    I know I'm in one now.

    It's verbal/emotional abuse. I think it's quite rare to actually find someone that isn't somewhat abusive but I've been around it my entire life maybe that's why I stay with it because it's all I know. My husband buts me down, everything I do. And he try's to control me and he...
    Sophia117 Sophia117 22-25, F 14 Responses Aug 9, 2015

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    Not me.. But someone very close to me.

    . I knew there was abuse.. But yesterday was the first time he hit her.. Open hand-> face.. Like a slap.. Twice.. And pulled hair.. I told her to leave.. She did promise to go to nearby hotel.. I slept in peace.. To find out next morning that she went back.. How can I help her...
    caramellacrisby caramellacrisby 22-25, F 4 Responses Jan 23

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    I was in a abusive relationship 3 half years .

    he went to jail twice put me in hospatil mental tourched me sexualy adults me and kept me as a prisoner I was a slave to his pleasure of evil justice I was slapped kicked punched strangled starved black and Blue and raped on a daily weekly basis no family friends lonely and had 2...
    xbossfemalex xbossfemalex 26-30, F 8 Responses Jun 26, 2015

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    I was maybe about 16.

    He lied to me about his age... saying he was 17 when really he was 25. He used to cut me, choke me, and rape me. He used me for sex and then when i got pregnant, he made me get an abortion. The doctor could see the tears in my eyes, and asked me if i really wanted to get this...
    nicky3489 nicky3489 18-21, F 8 Responses Aug 21, 2015

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    I see people saying, "just leave".

    Well it's not that easy. I think that victims of domestic violence would leave if they wanted to. But are too scared of what could happen if they did leave. Leaving an abuser is the most dangerous thing a victim could ever do. The victim can't just pack up their bags and go...
    Singlemother78 Singlemother78 31-35, F 5 Responses Nov 30, 2015

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    I'm almost out. I have an escape plan

    and I have support. But I'm too scared to even sleep because I know he still has a key... I just have to get through this weekend and then it's finally, truly, over, and I'm free at last.
    biscuitstiq biscuitstiq 26-30, T 6 Responses Jan 26

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    Survival mode started at age three

    for me. I did not land on a stable enough platform to begin processing a lifetime of traumatic experiences until the age of thirty-two. I am now forty. I have had an experience, it took forty years.
    FierceJourney FierceJourney 36-40, F 2 Responses Jan 11

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    I Got Flowers Today..

    ... I got flowers today... It wasn't my birthday or any other special day. We had our first argument last night, and he said a lot of cruel things that really hurt me. I know he is sorry and didn't mean the things he said...because he sent me flowers today. I got flowers today...
    legzydawlyy legzydawlyy 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 25

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    My ex used to yell at me

    and accuse me of infidelity. I really was faithful to the jerk. Then he started to hit me one day. I called the police. That is when he left me. That night I found a new guy and started sleeping around (a lot), by weeks end I had slept with four guys, Then the breakup of...
    BarbarBabcox BarbarBabcox 36-40, F 10 Responses Sep 24, 2014

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    I know this is very open

    but I often think back to my past- and I can finally say it is the reason to why I am how I am today. I was in such a controlling relationship. Was never aloud to speak to the opposite sex, wasn't aloud to go out etc but he was. Why should I have too follow one set of rules...
    aimsdisneyox aimsdisneyox 18-21, F 6 Responses Nov 4, 2015

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    I was in a abusive relationship

    for ten years all i knew were black eyes and swollen lips never wanting to wake up for you feared of what the next day would bring hide in from my family cause i was to scared to tell just dealing with all this pain by myself wishing that something or someone would come to...
    CDavis227 CDavis227 31-35, F 4 Responses May 6, 2015

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    I think it happens, unfortunately,

    to too many. I hope everyone it has happened to find a way out, and can take back their power. I did, and you can, too!
    ZenGrrrlLioNESS ZenGrrrlLioNESS 46-50, F 5 Responses Dec 25, 2015

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    I feel alone and stupid.

    Because my ex boyfriend or my boyfriend I don't know what it's now one day he love me and care the next minute he doest, I'm been with him for five year in I don't know what to do anymore. I love him so much but he doesn't see it even those when he been abussing to me are still...
    tweetyreck tweetyreck 22-25, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    now I know this is nothing compared to some of

    the stories I just seen on here, but here it goes....I started dating my boyfriend almost 6 years ago...during the 6 years we have been through it all....he was locked up we had a son...we dated other people. got back together, and now not only do we have a son but a 8 month old...
    teeq22 teeq22 18-21, F 3 Responses a week ago

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