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I Have Been In An Abusive Relationship

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 15,549 People

    The thing about these abusers.

    .. They always deny their abuse. Or they minimize or they change the story, rewrite history, have selective amnesia and gaslight. Dealing with these personality disordered people with custody of your children sucks. CPS is involved because of his abusive nature. They are...
    sartur sartur 36-40, F 22 Responses Jul 8

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    A long time ago I was married to an abusive man.

    When we first met he would throw his jacket over a puddle so I didn't have to walk in muddy water. He focused on my every need. We married 9 months after meeting. The abuse started as soon as the wedding was completed. He didn't even come home for 3 days after the wedding...
    yooper01 yooper01 56-60, F 8 Responses Nov 8, 2014

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    I need help. When I was 13 I was with a 25 year

    old who was physically, mentally and sexually abusive. I anonymously contacted the police and he was sent to prison for drug dealing. I'm 18 and I've just learned he's being released. I don't know if he's gonna come back to the same town, but I'm scared. Anyone been in this...
    ally96 ally96 18-21, F 5 Responses Jul 16

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    Everyone kept telling me

    that I was so lucky to be with such a lovely guy and that he was so gentle and so nice. "Wow you're so lucky your first boyfriend is so nice" . I don't know why I didn't say it sooner . That he wasn't all he appeared to be. My whole family loved him. I know it's been over for...
    CrazyKid4 CrazyKid4 18-21, F 5 Responses Aug 5, 2014

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    i have been with my abusive husband

    for 21years from the age of 16 (he was then 18). I am sharing my story in the hope that it will help you if you are facing something like this, that there is always a way to get out, it is scary but there is hope. For a long time he was so charming and he wanted to see me...
    KirstyF KirstyF 36-40, F 5 Responses Dec 13, 2013

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    My boyfriend fractured my leg this time.

    ..I can't blame myself anymore..I didn't start it this time...it was him...the pushing...the screaming...he picked me up and threw me cause I wouldn't let him leave...I didn't want him to be mad anymore..maybe I should of... What's even worse is I'm not even mad....but I'm scared...
    sisigns sisigns 18-21, F 1 Response 22 hrs ago

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    even after cutting off all contact,

    it still feels so painful. has anyone experienced this and would be willing to talk about it? its almost like PTSD
    butterfly4444 butterfly4444 22-25, F 9 Responses Jul 5

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    I was in an abusive relationship

    for 4 years, which I managed to escape about a year ago. For a long time I was very relieved that I was out of the situation because I never thought I would be able to end it. Everyday I felt grateful that I no longer had to live feeling like I was a slave who wasn't allowed...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Jun 13

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    I escaped... He nearly stabbed me in the chest

    with a buck knife. He broke my nose, he dragged me into the house by my hair. I thought he was going to kill me until I begged for God's mercy. I thought he was my soul mate, we had statistically impossible things in common. He got possessive really quick, and intuitively I...
    arandomuse arandomuse 26-30, F 7 Responses 1 day ago

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    Abuse can manifest itself in many forms.

    It allows the 'bully' to feel superior, when he or she is so very inferior.
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Jul 2

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    Caution: the following is a rant,

    not looking for pity, prayers or advice just venting it all out. Looking back on those years I am not filled with regret. I fell in love with the wrong person at 17, that happens to everyone at some point, my mistake was not recognizing a narcissistic psychopath but getting...
    Disobey247 Disobey247 22-25, F 3 Responses Apr 18

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    These pictures I took the day

    after make me cringe...I think I'm in denial...how is that even possible?
    sisigns sisigns 18-21, F 4 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    I'm just starting to tell people about it.

    it's left me with scars mentally and physically... and affects my new relationship.
    PaigeOfSteel PaigeOfSteel 16-17, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    I don't know if it's my fault

    that everything happen to me but I my husband it's very abusing I got to the point that I left the house, he said that he like that for everything I did, but he family said that he been like that b4 he meet me in he went to jail before for beating he ex girlfriend and he sister...
    tweetyreck tweetyreck 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 5

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    He had always made me happy,

    I remember when we first met - I was one of those who believed in love at first sight. After dating for six months he started to become very aggressive towards me and I always believed it was my fault. Then one night I came home from work and he called me saying he had a few...
    deleted deleted 26-30 7 Responses Sep 11, 2014

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    I've Been In Two Abusive Relationships.

    You would think I would learn from the 1st abusive relationship, but it really was a different situation the 2ND time. When I was 18yrs I became pregnant and chose to marry.  At that time we were both clean & sober.  On the night my child was born my...
    WarriorMom WarriorMom 51-55, F 21 Responses Dec 7, 2008

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    My last relationship lasted 5 years.

    I met the father of my son when I was 17 through a mutual acquaintance. Soon I was kicked out of my mom's apartment after he tried to break in to see if I was actually home because I took too long to text him back. I lived with him and his parents in their basement, where we...
    ImStrongerThanThat ImStrongerThanThat 22-25, F 4 days ago

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    I called my sister in law

    that night...so desperate not to get my family involved...but what else could I do...I couldn't even get to the door...she crawled in threw the window...I was embarrassed...that was a hard night...not because of what he did..but because I care so much of what people think..
    sisigns sisigns 18-21, F 21 hrs ago

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    I was in a relationship

    for 5.5 years.... Engaged and all. He broke up with me. For nothing . In the end thanks to work my best friend I got out of a abusive relationship. Don't let it exceeded the limits to wear your crying your eyes out
    cnabri92 cnabri92 22-25, F 5 Responses Jul 21

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    Black widow Tears fall upon my pillow Can see

    a fade in his glow He says nothing but he knows A venomous sting a raised bow Emotions hid and then showed An open door and then closed A memory half enclosed A flame is present but wind blows Can't shake the feeling it's exposed I'm wondering if he knows I must be the black...
    wingedjaguar wingedjaguar 22-25, F 3 Responses Apr 7

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    It started three years ago.

    He was perfect, the sweetest. Then came our two year anniversary and downhill our relationship went. He hit me every chance he got, it got harder and harder to hide the black eyes and bruises on my body. I began to do bad in my classes, because he made me skip class to see him...
    ImperialGoddess76 ImperialGoddess76 18-21, F 14 Responses Jan 1

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    Hey guys I just thought I'd tell my story in

    the hope that I can inspire other people to get out of abusive relationships. It all started about 16 years ago when in school I met a girl, the second I layed eyes on her I fell head over heels in love with her. For 18 months we happily got together and all was well in my world...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Oct 6, 2014

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    He got upset with me again today.

    ..he started to push me but he noticed and stopped...that's good right?...truth is I can't even say I'm happy...im just having a hard time letting go..he's good at manipulating me that way..I love him. I love him so much I know I need to say good bye...I'm scared.
    sisigns sisigns 18-21, F 3 Responses 22 hrs ago

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    My ex used to yell at me

    and accuse me of infidelity. I really was faithful to the jerk. Then he started to hit me one day. I called the police. That is when he left me. That night I found a new guy and started sleeping around (a lot), by weeks end I had slept with four guys, Then the breakup of...
    BarbarBabcox BarbarBabcox 36-40, F 10 Responses Sep 24, 2014

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    I've been in both physically

    and emotionally abusive types of relationships. It's been a crazy road but I think I've finally found a place where I know my worth and that I can do so much better.
    thepooloftears thepooloftears 26-30 5 Responses Apr 10

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    Why are men like it? You sleep with them

    and they think they own you! What was more, he was older than me, by ten years! I'm sure a seventeen years old woman is more mature then some, maybe most, twenty seven years old men!
    Paca24 Paca24 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 7, 2014

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    While growing up I was verbally abused

    and physically abused. maybe thats why all my exs were drawn to me. they all were abusive also. One reason I fear people these days.
    Averageguy41011 Averageguy41011 41-45, M 4 Responses Jul 19

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    Young Love... Not

    When I was a junior in high school (so not too long ago) there was a reserved, ridiculously beautiful, private, and extremely quiet guy. I think the reason why I was so attracted to him is because I was so much like him. Minus the ridiculously beautiful part of course. So long...
    IntoYourArms IntoYourArms 70+, F 9 Responses Nov 16, 2013

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    Actually just got out of one last night.

    . Pretty proud of myself, he's been blowing up my phone & I haven't been giving him the time of day, now all I gotta do is have these bruises cleared up & he's memory will be completely gone.
    aaaxaaa aaaxaaa 18-21, F 25 Responses Jun 25, 2014

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    I used to date a guy

    who I met while I was recovering from the end of a long-term relationship, and I was in a very vulnerable state. He used to control what I wore, where I went, who I spoke to, and when I got pregnant then lost the baby after 2 months he refused to let me talk about it. it took a...
    Selesnya Selesnya 31-35, F 1 Response Jul 14

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    I really don't want to talk too much about it

    but I married a controlling psychopath. He changed as soon as we were married and went on a spiral of abuse and menial torture. He was a drunk and would vanish for a day returning to take out his anger o me. I was raped, humiliated, degraded and beaten. The cycle of abuse...
    deleted deleted 26-30 8 Responses Jul 10, 2014

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    Never Thought It Would Happen To Me

    Growing up i was strong willed an *** kicker lol. I met this guy at a bar when i was 21 that should have been a red flag there. I thought he was my way out of the life i had. Things were good until u got pregnant. After my dayghter was born was when my life became hell. It...
    holehearted79 holehearted79 36-40, F 44 Responses Feb 23, 2013

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    I was in a abusive relationship 3 half years .

    he went to jail twice put me in hospatil mental tourched me sexualy adults me and kept me as a prisoner I was a slave to his pleasure of evil justice I was slapped kicked punched strangled starved black and Blue and raped on a daily weekly basis no family friends lonely and had 2...
    xbossfemalex xbossfemalex 26-30, F 7 Responses Jun 26

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    My 1st marriage was a 10 yr nightmare.

    Both physical and sexual abuse. It has affected my personality and relationships I've gotten involved in since. I'm too controlling because the first time around I had no control. It's not right, but having someone else telling you what you can and can't do, how to act, etc...
    LonesumnTx LonesumnTx 51-55, F 2 Responses Jul 19

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    I was in a abusive relationship

    for ten years all i knew were black eyes and swollen lips never wanting to wake up for you feared of what the next day would bring hide in from my family cause i was to scared to tell just dealing with all this pain by myself wishing that something or someone would come to...
    CDavis227 CDavis227 31-35, F 3 Responses May 6

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    once we moved in together my girlfriend

    gradually started disagreeing with anything that I would suggest like what to cook or cook at all or eat out, have or not have sex etc. She'd just basically make sure that she overrides whatever I wanted/suggested. Eventually led to breakup!
    codenamedaddy codenamedaddy 31-35, M 1 Response Jul 6

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    wonderwoman562 wonderwoman562 36-40, F 3 Responses Jul 22

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    Ugly

    I was 15 years old when I met Pat* the first time. I wasn't blown over by his looks, or his charm. Looking back, I don't know exactly WHAT it was that attracted me to him. In truth, I suppose it was an exit strategy from my dysfunctional home. Pat* was 11 years my senior. Of...
    MissBehaviour MissBehaviour 36-40, F 14 Responses Mar 18, 2012

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    I am married to the man

    that abused me. we worked through things, I found a way to forgive him, he's getting help. but now he's gone because of the charges that got brought up from september. I'm learning how to be okay now, with out him here
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jul 19

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    I told him to stop! crying screaming hitting

    and still never stopped :( the real problem is there's a little part of me that misses him a little bit..
    Cheya Cheya 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 9

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    Have to go back home

    for my grandfathers funeral. Extremely nervous that my ex will show up and try to follow me back to where I live now!
    Cat052314 Cat052314 26-30, F 3 Responses Jul 16

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    I've never told anyone my story,

    I think it'll feel good to get it out in the open. I think people should tell their stories. It doesn't make you weak or a victim. My ex was the perfect guy, strong and had a big heart. The relationship happened fast, the way he'd talk to me was like he'd never talked to any...
    Worleybirdie Worleybirdie 22-25, F 2 Responses May 5

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    I love the fact that

    after I liked this topic, my ex made a post about how he never abused me.. Sweetheart, this definitely wasn't about you, you weren't my first boyfriend. But hey, if you want to assume things, then I can assume that you actually were mentally abusive. Sooo. Maybe in some facets...
    LanniLette LanniLette 13-15, F 1 Response Jan 4

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    A very good read. http://www.

    elephantjournal.com/2015/06/the-toxic-attraction-between-an-empath-a-narcissist/
    bleedingheart11 bleedingheart11 36-40, F 3 Responses Jul 8

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    I don't do this but I am reaching out

    for support right now. I am currently walking out of a 6 yr abusive relationship. 2 of those years we have been married. I have been hurt physically and emotionally and i just feel lost. I am now the single mother of 3 boys which I can handle been doing it own my own for a while...
    cpowers89 cpowers89 26-30, F 15 Responses May 22

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    Why should I be the one

    who is too ashamed about him physically hurting me? I'm so ashamed that I can't even tell just one person. I fear feeling like a complete fool because I continuously stick around for him to hurt me physically, emotionally, and mentally. HE should be embarrassed. HE should be...
    Jennnnla Jennnnla 22-25, F 7 Responses a week ago

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