I Have Been In An Abusive Relationship

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 18,576 People

    I dated a diagnosed psychopath.

    He showered me with love and affection and showed so much interest in me from the start that I was smitten. Also he was very charming and handsome. He was very strong and muscular and that was attractive to me because he seemed strong and protective too. But then it turned...
    deleted deleted
    7 Responses Feb 1, 2016

    Understanding why and how we let these people

    in our lives is the only way to break the chain of abuse. These behaviors are modeled for us by our parents and we follow suit, but this is not always the case. for instance, most women who are subject to abuse had father's who were abusive to their mothers in some way. BUT some...
    lexingtonjane lexingtonjane
    36-40, F
    1 Response Jan 31, 2016

    Everything between us started off perfect.

    It was too good to be true of course. 1 month into our relationship he cheated on me. I forgave him like an idiot of course. He seemed really sorry, i believed it. When i refused to sleep with him he yelled at me and would just say horrible things. Months of emotional abuse...
    v1ct0rtilla v1ct0rtilla
    18-21, F
    4 Responses Jan 30, 2016

    The guy I was with recently dumped me

    and I realized that all the significant, romantic relationships I have been in have been abusive in some form. They've either flat out abused me - emotionally or sexually - or they've taken advantage of who I am as a person. Forgiveness, patience, kindness, hasn't gotten me very...
    terrywill15 terrywill15
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Jan 29, 2016

    I've never really talked about it except to

    people I'm closest to, so here goes nothin. When we started dating he treated me like I was precious and gave me attention i had never had before. It made me feel great and it didn't hurt that he was gorgeous. But the first time I realized something was up was 6 months in when...
    SnowWhite87 SnowWhite87
    26-30, F
    4 Responses Jan 27, 2016

    I have been through two abusive relationships,

    I am out now and safe. I want to tell everyone out there that no abuse is exceptable no matter if it's emotional physical or sexaul. Men get abused aswell it's not as common but it does happen. I had a lovely partner for a while he was gentle kind and thoughtful, he had and...
    chockywhockydoda chockywhockydoda
    51-55, F
    1 Response Jan 27, 2016

    Tonight he threw my dinner at the wall.

    I have been snowed in without access to my car as it is BURIED in snow. On my boyfriends way home I had asked him to pick up something from the pizza place for me which is right in front of his subway stop, he would have to carry it home about two blocks. He said no, I said...
    dcp1058 dcp1058
    26-30, F
    5 Responses Jan 27, 2016

    I'm almost out. I have an escape plan

    and I have support. But I'm too scared to even sleep because I know he still has a key... I just have to get through this weekend and then it's finally, truly, over, and I'm free at last.
    biscuitstiq biscuitstiq
    26-30, T
    4 Responses Jan 26, 2016

    I Got Flowers Today..

    ... I got flowers today... It wasn't my birthday or any other special day. We had our first argument last night, and he said a lot of cruel things that really hurt me. I know he is sorry and didn't mean the things he said...because he sent me flowers today. I got flowers today...
    legzydawlyy legzydawlyy
    22-25, F
    3 Responses Jan 25, 2016

    Not me.. But someone very close to me.

    . I knew there was abuse.. But yesterday was the first time he hit her.. Open hand-> face.. Like a slap.. Twice.. And pulled hair.. I told her to leave.. She did promise to go to nearby hotel.. I slept in peace.. To find out next morning that she went back.. How can I help her...
    caramellacrisby caramellacrisby
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Jan 23, 2016

    *Its kinda long, sorry My ex

    and I dated for about 7 months before I got pregnant. He wasn't too happy about the news, but eventually he came around. He was so kind and nurturing to me throughout my pregnancy. He'd constantly tell me how he loved me, how he'll spoil our child, and how we're gonna be the...
    Lia001 Lia001
    22-25, F
    3 Responses Jan 21, 2016

    It wasn't physical abuse

    but mental. And for years I didn't think it would even be considered abuse or even be important. But I have recently learned that it's still abuse and is just as important. I want to share my story to inform others and make it aware. To help others see the signs of abuse. If...
    ashuriiNikooru ashuriiNikooru
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jan 19, 2016

    In my first relationship i was abused

    and nobody knows about it. I thought I made him mad or did something cuz he always had a reason. I was with him a year and he made me lose all my friends and he cheated on me. I cant fully trust anyone anymore and im scared that if i make a guy mad enough he will hit me...
    Frozenheart1434 Frozenheart1434
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Jan 18, 2016

    and I'm proud to say I got out.

    for ten months I dealt with emotional abuse that turned physical quick. screaming and yelling about how I wasn't good enough started to change me mentally, I began to dote my time to him, if I wasn't at work, I was at his home. waiting to spend time with him. we did come from...
    4rae2 4rae2
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Jan 18, 2016

    He won't let me do anything

    and makes me talk to him all day or he pulls the sad depressed suicidal card... Help
    GeekiLizard GeekiLizard
    22-25, F
    6 Responses Jan 18, 2016

    It's been 4 years, 2 months,

    & 4 days since the last time you raped me & since the last time I saw you, so why can't I get the nightmares to go away?! It's not fair that I have these nightmares and flashbacks, while you just get you live a normal life. It's not fair that I have PTSD because of you... it's...
    untamedx3heart untamedx3heart
    22-25, F
    9 Responses Jan 15, 2016

    I just need some advice

    which I feel I pretty much know the answer to : My boyfriend suggesting that I care about money more than I care about my son is emotional abuse, no ?? My boyfriend telling me that he only buys me gifts so I won't tell at him My boyfriend telling me I'm not as strong as I...
    dcp1058 dcp1058
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Jan 14, 2016

    I've been having flashbacks lately.

    And it's hard to deal with when you have no one to talk to, but after being isolated in the relationship for 4 years you think I'd be use to it, but now I just feel lonelier.
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses Jan 13, 2016

    For my girls I left. Not wanting them to think

    that it's ever ok to stay in a bad relationship. For my girls I wanted them to know and see the error of my choices. Never ever did I want them to find themselves in the same situation. My daughter tells me that she's struggling in her current relationship. I ask her what...
    snowberry75 snowberry75
    36-40, F
    4 Responses Jan 11, 2016

    Survival mode started at age three

    for me. I did not land on a stable enough platform to begin processing a lifetime of traumatic experiences until the age of thirty-two. I am now forty. I have had an experience, it took forty years.
    FierceJourney FierceJourney
    41-45, F
    2 Responses Jan 11, 2016

    I once knew a girl in the years of my

    youth With eyes like the summer: all beauty and truth But in the morning I fled, left a note and it read “Someday you will be loved” And I cannot pretend that I felt any regret ‘Cause each broken heart will eventually mend Just as the blood runs red down the needle and...
    thelonliestrose thelonliestrose
    26-30, F
    1 Response Jan 5, 2016

    I've lived with 4 men

    who physically abused me and emotionally destroyed me into believing how worthless I was to keep me from leaving.. One of them even let his friends abuse me to keep my self esteem down.. I'll carry those emotional scars forever
    MotherOf3Becky MotherOf3Becky
    31-35, F
    4 Responses Jan 4, 2016

    I was married to a bipolar woman with a

    drinking problem. She would stop after work for drinks with co-workers while i sat at home with her children ( my step). When she wandered in late in the evening she wanted to fight. It mattered not wether i expressed displeasure or not. Living in that home was the low point of...
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses Dec 27, 2015

    and for some reason that one time of many,

    when my head hit the floor, I woke up. and I knew I couldn't do it anymore. that's the day I felt like I had purpose again- the day I realized I was being abused.
    pan79die pan79die
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Dec 26, 2015

    I am being abused by voices.

    I can't get away from them. They are republicans. They are Christians and Catholics. They are Jews. I don't understand why they are doing this to me. I feel damaged.
    DearAble DearAble
    51-55, M
    Dec 26, 2015

    I think it happens, unfortunately,

    to too many. I hope everyone it has happened to find a way out, and can take back their power. I did, and you can, too!
    ZenLioNESS719 ZenLioNESS719
    51-55, F
    5 Responses Dec 25, 2015

    its emotional and mental abuse more

    than physical. and it hurts me more than the physical abuse.
    evynray evynray
    22-25, F
    5 Responses Dec 24, 2015

    i cant believe im allowing myself to fall

    victim to his mental abuse again. i cant believe im letting him take control as if hes worth it. i think im killing myself just until hes vulnerable like i was, so i can crush his soul with secrets and lies and blind faith too.
    evynray evynray
    22-25, F
    3 Responses Dec 24, 2015

    well it was almost a full year ago

    when the pain stopped. His name was Steven and he was what I thought to be a caring guy, until we started dating. No matter what I said or did nothing was right...the bruises seemed to be everywhere I thought there would never be a day that would come where there wouldn't be one...
    SatansGuide SatansGuide
    22-25, F
    25 Responses Dec 21, 2015

    this time of year always makes me think about

    it. because of the help i had although i left my abuser i. July of 2012. just like you... broken dishes and cupboards smashed in windows and kicked in doors broken lamps and broken mirrors i lived it just like you nasty cruel words belittling and ridiculed embarrassed and...
    moongoddess35 moongoddess35
    36-40, F
    1 Response Dec 16, 2015

    i stayed for 12 long horrible years.

    i stayed when he denied out first born because god forbid he have a girl. i stayed when he first raised his hand to me and the second and third time. i stayed because he said i was used and no man would want me with the 2 kids. i stayed when he threw his dinner at the wall...
    moongoddess35 moongoddess35
    36-40, F
    8 Responses Dec 16, 2015

    I still believe in love.

    maybe its because I'm bi-polar I'm being bashed daily,off by myself for years now he keeps me isolated.im just tired of being his hidden monster as he describes me and I can be cause that's all I know.help I have no one
    misunderstood7 misunderstood7
    46-50, F
    2 Responses Dec 14, 2015

    If only was one! I think you are screwed the

    moment you care more than the other one, or see things in a deeper level than the other counterpart understanding. Doom to be abused... coz noone is like me, is it?
    4biandu 4biandu
    31-35, F
    Dec 12, 2015

    When I was 18, my ex boyfriend

    who was 20 at the time was so sweet and kind but he turned into an abusive douchebag. He hit me, slapped me and kicked me. He also pushed me against the, wall. He was 6'5 and I'm 6ft. My family begged me to leave him but he was so hot and good looking. Such big muscles so...
    misshighmaintenance misshighmaintenance
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Dec 10, 2015

    I've been in several abusive relationships.

    My last abusive relationship was with my husband. I never understood why he would hit me and drag me around on the floor. But I've learned that I can't let a man take advantage of me and using me. So I've taken time out to do me and not let a man control me!
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Dec 10, 2015

    my relationship was amazing

    and way to intense. for how old i am. He moved in when i was 13 and im 18 now. he only moved in because of family safty problems but it was the right thing. he had his own space and room and life but as things got intense. The abuse started. it happened on a vacation i did...
    learellie learellie
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Dec 9, 2015

    3 years ago! luckily I had my family there

    for me! :) it was my brother Charlie who knew something was going on! he knew I wasn't acting like myself! he actually sat me down and made me talk to him! once I told him, he went over to his house and beat the crap out of him! I hated him for it! it sicked having my younger...
    formercheerleader90 formercheerleader90
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Dec 1, 2015

    I see people saying, "just leave".

    Well it's not that easy. I think that victims of domestic violence would leave if they wanted to. But are too scared of what could happen if they did leave. Leaving an abuser is the most dangerous thing a victim could ever do. The victim can't just pack up their bags and go...
    Singlemother78 Singlemother78
    31-35, F
    4 Responses Nov 30, 2015

    Reasons for why I stayed.

    .. It wasn't because I loved him. It was because I was afraid of him. He threatened to take my child away from me if I left. I didn't know that I was being abused. I thought and hoped that he would change. I believed that nobody else would love me. My child needed a father...
    Singlemother78 Singlemother78
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Nov 30, 2015

    HELP, urgent. some old friends of me have a get

    together and my ex is coming, I really wanna se the others, but what he did still haunts me to this day, and it's 4 years ago I broke it off. I still feel angry and hateful about him and he's caused me so much misery and anxiety and fear of what would happen if I met him again...
    SweetBloodAngel SweetBloodAngel
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Nov 27, 2015

    Just found out that my abusive ex is dating

    again... Don't know how I feel about that. Sometimes ignorance is bliss. However, I feel sorry for the next woman in his life to realize his abusive & controlling tendencies. Guess I will see him court and hopefully there is justice in terms of felony charge and 1 year in jail...
    Dontphunkwitmyluv Dontphunkwitmyluv
    31-35, F
    5 Responses Nov 22, 2015

    So he left, he left and I'm starting to fuly

    recognize the abusive things he did to me .. more and more in the scond half of the relationship. I realized I did mistreat him and I have apologized and feel I made real progress the second half of the relatinship. So much as to I felt myself still continously making him upset...
    shana190 shana190
    18-21, F
    1 Response Nov 21, 2015

    really sad how many women post here

    and how few men post. it happens to everyone who trusts, unfortunately. I don't really need to share my story, suffice it to say I'm still mentalling dealing with that person years after we last spoke
    JacquelineJonez JacquelineJonez
    26-30, T
    Nov 20, 2015

    He committed Bigamy from 40 miles away with a

    SHIKH woman. She is Muslim but it was easy for her to washed out backyard and gotten a new name. So. as I run for my life from the Russian Shooter, name, Indian Sagor .. who us his Punjabi sheikh woman brother.. continue to stalk me. I feel resistance every where from NGO,s Case...
    thewindofnavajos thewindofnavajos
    46-50, F
    1 Response Nov 20, 2015

    I've just ended an20 month abusive relationship

    and he's moved on in 3 days. Unreal how these people destroy others and breeze through life.
    littlemoo48 littlemoo48
    46-50, F
    1 Response Nov 19, 2015

    It must be hard living like a parasite .

    .. Always taking... never giving. That's what you are and that's what you'll always be. I hate myself for letting you destroy my spark, the spark that makes me want to get up in the morning, the spark that kept me feeling alive and confident, fearless , accepted and loved. I...
    Misunderstoodlady Misunderstoodlady
    26-30, F
    7 Responses Nov 19, 2015

    Hi guys... I'm feeling really confused about my

    boyfriend who is about to end things with me after several times. I may be diagnosed with borderline personality disorder.. and i have admitted the bad things i have done in the relationship and am working toward and have sucessfully diminished these behaviours. But something is...
    shana190 shana190
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Nov 15, 2015

    I left him a year ago

    and Im all by myself with our son, he sometimes texted me and still makes me feel misrable. It is scary that someone abuses you but you cant really stay away from that person. It's like he still hunts me and I feel I can never be happy again.
    yali83 yali83
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Nov 15, 2015

    my ex calls me names

    and put his hands on me several times, he had OCD and is addict to drugs and alcohole...we have a two years old boy and Im the only one working. Im so tired, lonely and sad
    yali83 yali83
    31-35, F
    4 Responses Nov 15, 2015

    I have been in 2 teenage abusive relationships.

    1 required a restraining order.
    Chelsea1973 Chelsea1973
    41-45, F
    2 Responses Nov 13, 2015

    ive got my battle scars.

    they will heal in time and i will grow. im glad it happened the way it did. it showed me things about myself i need to work on and it also revealed to me things that he needs to work on as well.. i believe he came into my life for a purpose and his job is done. its important...
    luvdrunk luvdrunk
    26-30, F
    5 Responses Nov 11, 2015

    Been thru several abusive relationships

    and still I know how to love
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Nov 11, 2015

    Why do I still care and love

    and care about someone still who abused me in the worst ways and lied and stole from me. It's been 3 months since I've seen him I knew it would be the last time and we no longer talk I know he misses me and loves me still and he knows I miss him and I don't want to I'm still...
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Nov 10, 2015

    I'm lucky to be alive,

    and I learned a lot about what I want, and who I am in the process. If you're in this situation, make a plan, and get out. I will be forever grateful to those who helped me.
    ZenLioNESS719 ZenLioNESS719
    51-55, F
    2 Responses Nov 6, 2015

    I can't believe it's been almost 5 years

    since I left him. And I am still afraid of him. His threats of taking my daughter, still stays on my mind. He doesn't know that we moved out of my mom's house and am now living with my current boyfriend who treats me like a queen. I don't know what he would do if he were to find...
    Singlemother78 Singlemother78
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Nov 5, 2015

    Its not really abusive

    but he scares me... He is overly pushy and i was so scared...
    Depressedgirlxxx Depressedgirlxxx
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Nov 5, 2015

    He was my first love.

    He was very mean to me mentally but he definitely went too far physically. He hit me in the mouth if I said something he didn't like. If I knew he was about to hit me I would hit him or try to defend myself. I'm not a weak little b*tch who is going to sit there and take his...
    DeIuxedEdition DeIuxedEdition
    18-21, F
    14 Responses Nov 4, 2015

    I know this is very open

    but I often think back to my past- and I can finally say it is the reason to why I am how I am today. I was in such a controlling relationship. Was never aloud to speak to the opposite sex, wasn't aloud to go out etc but he was. Why should I have too follow one set of rules...
    aimsdisneyox aimsdisneyox
    22-25, F
    5 Responses Nov 4, 2015

    I have been in Several abusive relationships.

    Never by a family member. Always by a ex-boyfriend.It's like having someone chip away at your soul, step on the pieces, and blow the pieces in your eyes.It caused me to lose a lot of things in my life, one thing I can't get back.It has taken me years to get to the place I am now...
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Nov 4, 2015

    An older guy, he was hard sometimes in how he

    related to me. I left Gibraltar and came here to Holland to escape him. I do not value the memories I have of him.
    Liebenbergmrl Liebenbergmrl
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Oct 31, 2015
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