I Have Been In An Abusive Relationship

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 18,576 People

    Never Thought It Would Happen To Me

    Growing up i was strong willed an *** kicker lol. I met this guy at a bar when i was 21 that should have been a red flag there. I thought he was my way out of the life i had. Things were good until u got pregnant. After my dayghter was born was when my life became hell. It...
    WhisperingEchoes WhisperingEchoes
    36-40, F
    39 Responses Feb 23, 2013

    Actually just got out of one last night.

    . Pretty proud of myself, he's been blowing up my phone & I haven't been giving him the time of day, now all I gotta do is have these bruises cleared up & he's memory will be completely gone.
    aaaxaaa aaaxaaa
    22-25, F
    21 Responses Jun 25, 2014


    I was 15 years old when I met Pat* the first time. I wasn't blown over by his looks, or his charm. Looking back, I don't know exactly WHAT it was that attracted me to him. In truth, I suppose it was an exit strategy from my dysfunctional home. Pat* was 11 years my senior. Of...
    MissBehaviour MissBehaviour
    36-40, F
    11 Responses Mar 18, 2012

    The thing about these abusers.

    .. They always deny their abuse. Or they minimize or they change the story, rewrite history, have selective amnesia and gaslight. Dealing with these personality disordered people with custody of your children sucks. CPS is involved because of his abusive nature. They are...
    BijouBlue BijouBlue
    41-45, F
    16 Responses Jul 8, 2015

    I don't do this but I am reaching out

    for support right now. I am currently walking out of a 6 yr abusive relationship. 2 of those years we have been married. I have been hurt physically and emotionally and i just feel lost. I am now the single mother of 3 boys which I can handle been doing it own my own for a while...
    cpowers89 cpowers89
    26-30, F
    13 Responses May 22, 2015


      i have not been in a physically abusive relationship, but it was a very mentally abusive relationship.. the scars were deep in my mind and heart.. i was with a girl and for the first 6 months we had the best time.. i love to laugh and make jokes and tell funny stories of...
    breastlover81 breastlover81
    26-30, M
    21 Responses Nov 9, 2012

    Young Love... Not

    When I was a junior in high school (so not too long ago) there was a reserved, ridiculously beautiful, private, and extremely quiet guy. I think the reason why I was so attracted to him is because I was so much like him. Minus the ridiculously beautiful part of course. So long...
    IntoYourArms IntoYourArms
    70+, F
    9 Responses Nov 16, 2013

    He was my first love.

    He was very mean to me mentally but he definitely went too far physically. He hit me in the mouth if I said something he didn't like. If I knew he was about to hit me I would hit him or try to defend myself. I'm not a weak little b*tch who is going to sit there and take his...
    DeIuxedEdition DeIuxedEdition
    18-21, F
    14 Responses Nov 4, 2015

    In some weird way I know you meant well.

    Even after my concussion. Even after feeling your relentless force. It's just that when you got really passionate about something you would sometimes turn into a monster. As I did. I'm not making excuses for you, I know the severity of the situation and I know that you took...
    wingedjaguar wingedjaguar
    26-30, F
    5 Responses Aug 24, 2015

    My ex used to yell at me

    and accuse me of infidelity. I really was faithful to the jerk. Then he started to hit me one day. I called the police. That is when he left me. That night I found a new guy and started sleeping around (a lot), by weeks end I had slept with four guys, Then the breakup of...
    BarbarBabcox BarbarBabcox
    41-45, F
    6 Responses Sep 24, 2014

    I think it happens, unfortunately,

    to too many. I hope everyone it has happened to find a way out, and can take back their power. I did, and you can, too!
    ZenLioNESS719 ZenLioNESS719
    51-55, F
    5 Responses Dec 25, 2015

    I've never really talked about it except to

    people I'm closest to, so here goes nothin. When we started dating he treated me like I was precious and gave me attention i had never had before. It made me feel great and it didn't hurt that he was gorgeous. But the first time I realized something was up was 6 months in when...
    SnowWhite87 SnowWhite87
    26-30, F
    4 Responses Jan 27, 2016

    i stayed for 12 long horrible years.

    i stayed when he denied out first born because god forbid he have a girl. i stayed when he first raised his hand to me and the second and third time. i stayed because he said i was used and no man would want me with the 2 kids. i stayed when he threw his dinner at the wall...
    moongoddess35 moongoddess35
    36-40, F
    8 Responses Dec 16, 2015

    It's been 4 years, 2 months,

    & 4 days since the last time you raped me & since the last time I saw you, so why can't I get the nightmares to go away?! It's not fair that I have these nightmares and flashbacks, while you just get you live a normal life. It's not fair that I have PTSD because of you... it's...
    untamedx3heart untamedx3heart
    22-25, F
    9 Responses Jan 15, 2016

    For my girls I left. Not wanting them to think

    that it's ever ok to stay in a bad relationship. For my girls I wanted them to know and see the error of my choices. Never ever did I want them to find themselves in the same situation. My daughter tells me that she's struggling in her current relationship. I ask her what...
    snowberry75 snowberry75
    36-40, F
    4 Responses Jan 11, 2016

    I know this is very open

    but I often think back to my past- and I can finally say it is the reason to why I am how I am today. I was in such a controlling relationship. Was never aloud to speak to the opposite sex, wasn't aloud to go out etc but he was. Why should I have too follow one set of rules...
    aimsdisneyox aimsdisneyox
    22-25, F
    5 Responses Nov 4, 2015

    I know I'm in one now.

    It's verbal/emotional abuse. I think it's quite rare to actually find someone that isn't somewhat abusive but I've been around it my entire life maybe that's why I stay with it because it's all I know. My husband buts me down, everything I do. And he try's to control me and he...
    Sophia117 Sophia117
    22-25, F
    14 Responses Aug 9, 2015

    While growing up I was verbally abused

    and physically abused. maybe thats why all my exs were drawn to me. they all were abusive also. One reason I fear people these days.
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses Jul 19, 2015

    I see people saying, "just leave".

    Well it's not that easy. I think that victims of domestic violence would leave if they wanted to. But are too scared of what could happen if they did leave. Leaving an abuser is the most dangerous thing a victim could ever do. The victim can't just pack up their bags and go...
    Singlemother78 Singlemother78
    31-35, F
    4 Responses Nov 30, 2015

    people ask why did you stay,

    l guess they don't know how trapped you feel, how worthless they make you feel, what a failure in life you feel, the embarrassment of saying to your family
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Sep 11, 2015

    Everything between us started off perfect.

    It was too good to be true of course. 1 month into our relationship he cheated on me. I forgave him like an idiot of course. He seemed really sorry, i believed it. When i refused to sleep with him he yelled at me and would just say horrible things. Months of emotional abuse...
    v1ct0rtilla v1ct0rtilla
    18-21, F
    4 Responses Jan 30, 2016

    I really don't want to talk too much about it

    but I married a controlling psychopath. He changed as soon as we were married and went on a spiral of abuse and menial torture. He was a drunk and would vanish for a day returning to take out his anger o me. I was raped, humiliated, degraded and beaten. The cycle of abuse...
    deleted deleted
    6 Responses Jul 10, 2014

    I was in a abusive relationship 3 half years .

    he went to jail twice put me in hospatil mental tourched me sexualy adults me and kept me as a prisoner I was a slave to his pleasure of evil justice I was slapped kicked punched strangled starved black and Blue and raped on a daily weekly basis no family friends lonely and had 2...
    xbossfemalex xbossfemalex
    26-30, F
    7 Responses Jun 26, 2015

    I was maybe about 16.

    He lied to me about his age... saying he was 17 when really he was 25. He used to cut me, choke me, and rape me. He used me for sex and then when i got pregnant, he made me get an abortion. The doctor could see the tears in my eyes, and asked me if i really wanted to get this...
    nicky3489 nicky3489
    22-25, F
    6 Responses Aug 21, 2015

    I was in a abusive relationship

    for ten years all i knew were black eyes and swollen lips never wanting to wake up for you feared of what the next day would bring hide in from my family cause i was to scared to tell just dealing with all this pain by myself wishing that something or someone would come to...
    CDavis227 CDavis227
    36-40, F
    4 Responses May 6, 2015

    4 years ago yesterday,

    I finally got the courage to break up with you. I thought that if I did, that you would be out of my life for good. Unfortunately, I was very wrong. I still had to deal with you for about 3 more months. 3 months of you threatening not only me, but my family as well. You...
    untamedx3heart untamedx3heart
    22-25, F
    4 Responses Aug 14, 2015

    It must be hard living like a parasite .

    .. Always taking... never giving. That's what you are and that's what you'll always be. I hate myself for letting you destroy my spark, the spark that makes me want to get up in the morning, the spark that kept me feeling alive and confident, fearless , accepted and loved. I...
    Misunderstoodlady Misunderstoodlady
    26-30, F
    7 Responses Nov 19, 2015

    I'm still with my abuser.

    Some of the things he's done to me caused me to have nightmares. I love him dearly and even though I know he is poisonous to my life I can't leave. Iv given him everything a person can give to another I'm currently pregnant with his first child. He still treats me like...
    Stiggyb Stiggyb
    26-30, F
    7 Responses Jul 20, 2014

    He said I had became the woman

    that he always wanted... But, when he finally got me all he did was abuse me and make me feel bad about myself... Does this make sense to anyone else? Thoughts?
    Mfudgie Mfudgie
    31-35, F
    9 Responses Jun 19, 2015

    I was in an abusive relationship

    for 4 years, which I managed to escape about a year ago. For a long time I was very relieved that I was out of the situation because I never thought I would be able to end it. Everyday I felt grateful that I no longer had to live feeling like I was a slave who wasn't allowed...
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Jun 13, 2015

    I've been in both physically

    and emotionally abusive types of relationships. It's been a crazy road but I think I've finally found a place where I know my worth and that I can do so much better.
    thepooloftears thepooloftears
    4 Responses Apr 10, 2015

    I've been in several abusive relationships.

    My last abusive relationship was with my husband. I never understood why he would hit me and drag me around on the floor. But I've learned that I can't let a man take advantage of me and using me. So I've taken time out to do me and not let a man control me!
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Dec 10, 2015

    I went to the beach today

    and for the first time in 3 years, I wore a bikini and wasn't worried about having to hide bruises and marks from you. It's the little things that make me so happy to finally be free :)
    Embaby8 Embaby8
    18-21, F
    4 Responses Sep 3, 2015

    At age 14 I started dating a boy

    and when he said he loved me I believed him, it didn't take long for him to become abusive. It started with words and threats, but eventually escalated to pulling slapping and leaving bruises on me. I was too ashamed to say anything to anyone so I suffered in silence for 2 years...
    arirose4343 arirose4343
    18-21, F
    7 Responses Oct 5, 2015

    Reasons for why I stayed.

    .. It wasn't because I loved him. It was because I was afraid of him. He threatened to take my child away from me if I left. I didn't know that I was being abused. I thought and hoped that he would change. I believed that nobody else would love me. My child needed a father...
    Singlemother78 Singlemother78
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Nov 30, 2015

    Been thru several abusive relationships

    and still I know how to love
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Nov 11, 2015

    i have been with my abusive husband

    for 21years from the age of 16 (he was then 18). I am sharing my story in the hope that it will help you if you are facing something like this, that there is always a way to get out, it is scary but there is hope. For a long time he was so charming and he wanted to see me...
    KirstyF KirstyF
    41-45, F
    5 Responses Dec 13, 2013

    Everyone kept telling me

    that I was so lucky to be with such a lovely guy and that he was so gentle and so nice. "Wow you're so lucky your first boyfriend is so nice" . I don't know why I didn't say it sooner . That he wasn't all he appeared to be. My whole family loved him. I know it's been over for...
    CrazyKid4 CrazyKid4
    18-21, F
    4 Responses Aug 5, 2014

    He had always made me happy,

    I remember when we first met - I was one of those who believed in love at first sight. After dating for six months he started to become very aggressive towards me and I always believed it was my fault. Then one night I came home from work and he called me saying he had a few...
    deleted deleted
    5 Responses Sep 11, 2014

    I've never told anyone my story,

    I think it'll feel good to get it out in the open. I think people should tell their stories. It doesn't make you weak or a victim. My ex was the perfect guy, strong and had a big heart. The relationship happened fast, the way he'd talk to me was like he'd never talked to any...
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses May 5, 2015

    I've, been in an abusive relationship.

    Feels kinda weird even mentioning it. But yeah, all he wanted from me was sex.... and share me with his buddy's.... I've gotten every time I no, until I just gave up and let happen. I was ashamed to talk to my parents or anyone about it. Eventually, my teacher had some marks and...
    kissycakes8 kissycakes8
    22-25, F
    3 Responses Mar 2, 2016

    this is a poem I wrote about women being abused

    and I hope you like it this isn't a relationship it's a hostage situation silences screams louder then a fat lady sings hands tied he lied, he didn't love you in the first place you can't break free continue to send out your silent screams until you're seen your life...
    deleted deleted
    Feb 8, 2016

    I can't believe it's been almost 5 years

    since I left him. And I am still afraid of him. His threats of taking my daughter, still stays on my mind. He doesn't know that we moved out of my mom's house and am now living with my current boyfriend who treats me like a queen. I don't know what he would do if he were to find...
    Singlemother78 Singlemother78
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Nov 5, 2015

    You had a hard day at work.

    .left the office..walking in the car park..get inside your car and suddenly it hits you... Where do I go? who do I go to? its that feeling of homelessness that hits you real hard in the heart!!
    Simplicity9711 Simplicity9711
    36-40, M
    3 Responses Oct 12, 2015

    I love the fact that

    after I liked this topic, my ex made a post about how he never abused me.. Sweetheart, this definitely wasn't about you, you weren't my first boyfriend. But hey, if you want to assume things, then I can assume that you actually were mentally abusive. Sooo. Maybe in some facets...
    LanniLette LanniLette
    18-21, F
    1 Response Jan 4, 2015

    this time of year always makes me think about

    it. because of the help i had although i left my abuser i. July of 2012. just like you... broken dishes and cupboards smashed in windows and kicked in doors broken lamps and broken mirrors i lived it just like you nasty cruel words belittling and ridiculed embarrassed and...
    moongoddess35 moongoddess35
    36-40, F
    1 Response Dec 16, 2015

    I am thankful everyday

    that I left the father of my child. I still can't believe what I put up from him within the last year of our "relationship." A hard lesson learned and one that I will never forget is to never let someone belittle you, physically or emotionally. The door is right there and you...
    brighteyes1313 brighteyes1313
    26-30, F
    4 Responses Sep 13, 2015

    Can It Get Any Worse?

    Well Im a much different  person now then I was back when I was young and stupid. As many people put it! Or labled me. I had my first child when I was 15 years old. I dont regret that what so ever, he is the love and pride and joy of my life!! Hes gonna be 15 this...
    shy30 shy30
    26-30, F
    7 Responses May 7, 2007

    I've Been In Two Abusive Relationships.

    You would think I would learn from the 1st abusive relationship, but it really was a different situation the 2ND time. When I was 18yrs I became pregnant and chose to marry.  At that time we were both clean & sober.  On the night my child was born my...
    WarriorMom WarriorMom
    51-55, F
    20 Responses Dec 7, 2008


    I remember his smell. The way his voice would waiver when he was on the verge of one of his episodes . I tried to stay out of his way. I remember the last time he put his hands on me. He had ran through all his usual insults. Fat, ugly , disgusting, imperfect, lazy, and whatever...
    31-35, F
    10 Responses Nov 18, 2012

    Hey guys I just thought I'd tell my story in

    the hope that I can inspire other people to get out of abusive relationships. It all started about 16 years ago when in school I met a girl, the second I layed eyes on her I fell head over heels in love with her. For 18 months we happily got together and all was well in my world...
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Oct 6, 2014

    I was in an abusive relationship.

    Actually I wAs in 2. People who have never lived through that have no idea the damage it does. People judge because a person stays in the relationship but please don't. Because until you have walked in that persons shoes you have no idea. I was blessed that the abuse was only...
    deleted deleted
    4 Responses Dec 22, 2014

    Why are men like it? You sleep with them

    and they think they own you! What was more, he was older than me, by ten years! I'm sure a seventeen years old woman is more mature then some, maybe most, twenty seven years old men!
    Paca24 Paca24
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jul 7, 2014

    i told my adult sons last night about

    why their father and me divorced 15 years ago. i was scared to do it. i didn't tell them everything because there is just some stuff just doesn't need to be discussed between mother and sons, especially when they think the sun rises on the man. i got a text from ex sister in law...
    46-50, F
    2 Responses Sep 15, 2015

    I am making a you tube video

    as an advocate for domestic violence ...more women need to hear our stories more high school girls who are letting guys beat them at 14 years old ... this violence needs to stop .. so I am asking any survivors even if your still in that situation your a SURVIVOR to come...
    finelyhappy1029 finelyhappy1029
    26-30, F
    2 Responses May 6, 2015

    Black widow Tears fall upon my pillow Can see

    a fade in his glow He says nothing but he knows A venomous sting a raised bow Emotions hid and then showed An open door and then closed A memory half enclosed A flame is present but wind blows Can't shake the feeling it's exposed I'm wondering if he knows I must be the black...
    wingedjaguar wingedjaguar
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Apr 7, 2015

    I am young. And my experiences may not measure

    up to those of more mature women....but it was unbelievably scary...and I hope i can feel safe sharing my experience here without giving the impression of overreacting to a minor infraction compared to the stresses of some abuse stories. When I was 15 I was in a relationship...
    DaisyRio DaisyRio
    18-21, F
    4 Responses Sep 10, 2015

    I'm having a really tough time today.

    I was watching the documentary Hot Girls Wanted (it's a documentary about girls in the **** industry. It actually gives pretty good insight as to what it's like for these girls) and it got to the part about abuse **** and I just lost it. First off, I don't judge what consenting...
    AmayaTsuki AmayaTsuki
    26-30, F
    5 Responses Sep 25, 2015

    its emotional and mental abuse more

    than physical. and it hurts me more than the physical abuse.
    evynray evynray
    22-25, F
    5 Responses Dec 24, 2015

    It has been three years now,

    since I left. Things are better, but I am still haunted by the memories, by dreams, by flashbacks of the past. I still have emotional triggers that pop up at random times. I can't handle men raising their voices, even when it isn't directed at me. I don't like watching...
    kitkat0216 kitkat0216
    31-35, F
    1 Response Sep 7, 2015
More Stories