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I Have Body Dysmorphic Disorder

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 884 People

    How Can You Have Bdd and Date?

    Hello, this is my first entry on this site, and I am happy to have found a place where I'm not the only person who feels like this. I have been dealing with BDD since I was 14, or 15. I'm 23 now, and I can honestly say it gets worse with age. I know a lot of ppl say they are...
    remy90 remy90 22-25 24 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    It feels weird that I've actually gotten to a

    stage where I feel the need to post about this. As I've grown up over the past few years I've become far more aware of how ridiculous many things are - how women are airbrushed to perfection in media, how conventionally attractive people are treated altogether differently from...
    mimimoon mimimoon 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 22, 2013

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    What it is like to be the only ugly woman.

    Every time I see any random woman anywhere, I think of things that people close to her might love about her. Maybe it's the way her eyes light up when she finds something interesting. Maybe it's how great she looks in her pink floral skirt, hugging her curves perfectly. Maybe...
    brriittttaannyy brriittttaannyy 16-17, F 5 Responses Apr 14

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    Facial Assymetry

    I was a very pretty girl. I would get compliments daily. I have long black hair, olive skin and exotic looking. I used to model. I got a bad outbreak of acne in my early 20's. A few months ago, i got silikon 1000 for my acne scarring from a very reputable doctor in New york...
    msmmm msmmm 26-30, F 1 Response Sep 2, 2013

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    You called her beautiful But she never did hear

    you. Mascara bleeds down Her tear stained cheeks. You brushed your lips on hers Showed her you care Yet her lips still quiver Beneath blotchy cheeks You whisper admiration Cherish her, love her Hoping to fill that gaping void Yet still she’s ‘finding’ her cracks You try to...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Oct 27, 2014

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    I had this really bad

    but I overcame it, it may seem impossible but it is possible! Don't be afraid to speak out about it!
    wheelsxoxo wheelsxoxo 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 6, 2014

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    Today I'm supposed to go to my dance practice

    but I don't want to leave the house. I finally thought I felt good about my body but reminiscing last night of all the fat shaming my mum has done to me made me remember things. And now I hate looking at the mirror I don't want to. I look fat and stupid honestly. I know I'm more...
    MusicalGirl24 MusicalGirl24 13-15, F Mar 15

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    I know I'm not severely obese

    nor overweight at all but it's like my eyes don't want me to see the real me with my body. All I see is fat literally everywhere and I feel like I'm getting bigger every single day. I've recovered from anorexia with bulimic tendencies and I'm eating correctly and exercising but...
    blossomingMe blossomingMe 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 24, 2014

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    It hurts having to get up at 5am every morning,

    to spend 3 hours fully on makeup to only be called 'ugly' that day or not be noticed. It hurts spending loads of money on clothes, to only be told you look weird wearing it. It hurts when people point out your flaws, although you're already fully self conscious of them. It hurts...
    SilkyDoughnut SilkyDoughnut 16-17, F 3 Responses Oct 5, 2014

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    Okay, so I don't personally have Body

    Dysmorphic Disorder but I have a boyfriend who does. We're both 18 years old and have been together for almost 2 years now and we both met when I was 15. Throughout my time with him as his girlfriend I knew something was wrong with his self esteem but I didn't think much of it...
    hannie96 hannie96 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 12

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    I am an almost 21 year old female.

    5'7" and 115 pounds. I have struggled with severe self esteem issues for years, basically my whole adolescent and teenage life and since I was around 18, it has gotten progressively worse. It wasn't until the last year at a half or so that I self diagnosed myself with Body...
    Iambekah Iambekah 18-21, F Oct 20, 2014

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    I have body dysmorphic disorder

    and it's taking over my life.
    SkinnyLovex SkinnyLovex 22-25, F 2 Responses Jun 15, 2014

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    BDD destroyed my hopes,

    dreams, everything. I never felt good enough for anyone. I was ashamed of my nose. I would stare in the mirror for hours, cry and scream "Why was I born? I'm so ugly I will never be loved!" I got fed up I couldn't live live like this any longer (7 yrs). I turned this anger into...
    AshyleeTheLittleBunny AshyleeTheLittleBunny 22-25, F 8 Responses Jun 13

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    I am convinced I am hideous.

    I spend hours putting on makeup throughout the day and constantly check myself in the mirror. I spend so much time obsessing about my face being even (makeup wise) and always worrying about how it looks/what other people think of it. It's annoying because I have a good figure...
    pageee pageee 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 7

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    As a child I grew up in a household with an

    alcoholic father, who was very much a dictator in the household, had anger problems, consistently cheated on my mom and would get into alcohol rages. My mother was depressed and passive. Hardly standing up for herself. My brother and I acted out a lot in our unstable...
    CountryPrincess88 CountryPrincess88 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 26

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    What's to hate.. Everything from head to toe.

    Missing those days when as a little kid it did not affect me of what I looked like or what I eat. Now I wish I would've taken care of myself. I am not the age where I should be lazy but it's hard living in depression over my bodyily issues. Everyone is bound to have an answer to...
    VenomOfMadrid VenomOfMadrid 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 23

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    It Starts Off Cute Trying To Be Little Miss Perfect... Then It Gets Ugly.

    I'm 17 years old, and I've always been depicted as a perfectionist, perfect grades, handwriting, anything i could learn i would make sure i became "perfect" at it. However, the thing i cannot learn is how to accept the unsymmetrical flaws in my face + body. I hate the flaws, i...
    MissLorii MissLorii 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 28, 2013

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    Any one else struggling with BDD (Body

    Dysmorphic disorder)? how does it affect you? I don't want to feel so isolated
    CrystallizedxTears CrystallizedxTears 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 2, 2014

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    I've just been diagnosed with BDD.

    I find it hard to accept because I look at photos of myself and think NAH IM JUST UGLY. Anyone been diagnosed that think that?
    megpeg megpeg 22-25, F 5 Responses May 19

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    Facial Hatred

    The vast majority of the time I want to rip my face off. Extreme, yes but I cannot even think about myself without wanting to vomit
    brogues brogues 22-25, F 3 Responses Jan 16, 2010

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    I Am Dying With It, Yet Cant Live Without It.

    It's both frustrating and confusing to know that the world sees a different person when they look at me than I do. A lot of people don't take me seriously when I tell them about my BDD... They either don't believe me, and assume that I'm just seeking some sort of attention, or...
    OblitusAuri OblitusAuri 22-25, F 20 Responses May 1, 2010

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    I dread looking in mirrors.

    I hate what I see. I look hideous. I try to tell myself that I'm beautiful everyday to gain some confidence, but I always go back to feeling ugly. My friends, my family and some strangers would say that I'm beautiful, but I just don't see it. I don't see what they see. Is the...
    msladyt757 msladyt757 26-30, F 5 Responses Jul 8, 2014

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    I have suffered from this

    for years. But every time I try to talk with anyone about how bad I feel because I hate my boobs or any other part I may be focused on, they will dismiss my feelings as if my feelings don't matter! I have been told to grow up, that I don't have any real problems if something...
    kcyata kcyata 41-45, F 2 Responses Jun 10

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    It Gets Better!

    I've suffered with BDD for as long as I can remember. When I was very young I used to draw faces and cut them out, wearing them for days until they became as ugly as I thought I was. I wanted to change everything about myself. My name, my face, my body... to some point? I still...
    ThisIsMediocritiesOldAcc ThisIsMediocritiesOldAcc 18-21, F Jan 23, 2013

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    I've just been diagnosed with BDD.

    It sucks. I obsess over how white my teeth are, how my hair looks, what clothes I wear, etc. I worry that when people see me, they see the frizzy hair, the acne, my not-so-white teeth. I also obsess with how skinny I am. I see myself as being extremely underweight and I'm always...
    killyourhero killyourhero 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 1, 2014

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    I've been feeling extremely low this weekend.

    I had a bad BDD attack. This was triggered by me taking pictures of myself and looking at them. I break down into tears when I look at pictures of me. I always look so ugly and hideous. Funnily enough the weekend before I went clubbing and was getting lots of male attention and...
    fluffyunicorn fluffyunicorn 18-21, F Jan 4

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    I'm doing a project. I need words associated

    with body image problems tht I can write on my body. For example, fat, ugly, thigh gap, depressed. Please help me come up with more words!
    Tiffanyportelli Tiffanyportelli 22-25, F 3 Responses Apr 15

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    Recently I have come to terms with my moderate

    body dysmorphic disorder. I have just realized that it is bad enough that I need to see a professional for help. Not because I have developed an eating disorder or exercise addiction, but because it has resulted in extremely low self-esteem. My low self-esteem has pushed away...
    smilemoonbright smilemoonbright 26-30, F Mar 27

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    Hi everyone, so basically this is quite tough

    for me to talk about because it pains me to do so... But I feel I have to share in order to 'tackle' this issue and try to solve it. I was a fat kid and had always been fat through out my childhood, and had been bullied before. until I hit about 15-16 when I started exercising...
    Iduneven Iduneven 18-21, M 1 Response Jun 19

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    I'm not sure how long i can handle this.

    Its getting so hard. I'm constantly feeling uncomfortable in my own skin, however i try not to show it. I put on a smile and try my hardest to keep this a secret. I've gotten so ashamed of my body, that I've began to start being ashamed of my own mind. I feel like I'm spiraling...
    BeautifullyBad BeautifullyBad 16-17, F 1 Response Jan 18

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    My name jay I suffer from body dismorhic

    for 2years now I wanted to get breast implants but I tried breast pill instead I became quite I'll after that I suffered body dismorhic I felt hideous and deformed I thought the tablets did somethink to me, living in fear with my demonds can't look in the mirrow. Life been a...
    jadeygrz jadeygrz 26-30, F 2 Responses Jun 9

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    I lost a ton of weight,

    I felt like I was looking good. But I don't have perfect pecs and I think my head is too big. I also always feel like when I eat non healthy food my face gets fatter. I know I sound like a girl, it's hard to say this to people. I know people don't notice the changes I notice...
    tomcunnington tomcunnington 18-21, M 1 Response Jan 10, 2014

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    I've been battling with hating myself

    for a very long time, years! And it's all now become too much, it's ruining my relationship.. So I've decide to finally seek help by talking to people with the same problem as me. It's occurred to me before that I may have BDD but I just thought I was being silly and that's what...
    belle87 belle87 26-30, F 2 Responses Mar 23, 2014

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    New To Bdd

    My name is Kat and I have had BDD my entire life. I'm finally deciding at the age of 21 to get help for this disorder because it has progressively gotten worse and I never even knew it existed. I wasn't diagnosed until now because I never spoke up about my symptoms since i feel...
    katinthehat3 katinthehat3 18-21, F 3 Responses Jun 3, 2012

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    I tend to focus on different things at

    different times, because I really don't like anything about my looks. But today I am completely disgusted by my mouth. I have these marionette lines so I always look like I'm frowning. I hate it! I look so horribly old!! Worst of all my husband says not to worry about it...
    kcyata kcyata 41-45, F 2 Responses Jul 3

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    This is one of those stories.

    .I struggled so hard to find a name for this...I always was insecure.Never wanted to take photosNever wanted to have sex (it controlled my love life)Thought i was fatwas constantly looking in the mirror and finding things on my face/body that surgery could hopefully "fix."Hating...
    cbeneath cbeneath 22-25, F 5 Responses Jul 6, 2014

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    She's convinced that she is also part he but

    nothings incomplete the charts read that she's just fine just her spine is just a little wide She puts the coffee on the table but catches her reflection, able to see a glimpse of somethings that's admis "No, that's not right!" she cries Those hips too narrow, that bosom too...
    Freak0Zoida Freak0Zoida 26-30, F Feb 4

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    (I Do Not Own Anything)

    Mirror, Mirror by xXxHeatherAnnxXx (from devian art) That girl you see, look at her face. Not an imperfection lies in place. Look into her eyes so bright, Look closer, something isn't right. In her distorted mind, this young girl, Dwells a fear that others see mutations, Enough...
    marylight098 marylight098 13-15, F 1 Response Dec 2, 2013

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    Relationships And Bdd

    I have BDD and my boyfriend of (going on) 2 years knows it's truly real and can take over my day if not my life for weeks on end. I am not sure how he can handle it or how well he really does but he makes a true effort to try to understand where i am coming from and what i see...
    lisra lisra 18-21, F 12 Responses Nov 16, 2010

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    When I was 12 years old in 2012 I was 162cm

    (5"2") and I weighed 50 kg (111LBS). I wanted to Gain weight, I was convinced I was underweight and I was. But gaining weight was the worst choice I ever made. I got to high school in 2013 and I was around 167cm (5"6") and I weighed 65 kilos (143 LBS) I then thought I was fat...
    gayspeedolover gayspeedolover 13-15, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I was reading an anxiety book to help me get

    through my anxiety when it said about BDD and it turns out I have it which is causing me social anxiety since I was a little kid. just great...and its getting worse with the way I look at my body too. the only thing I like about myself is my personality and thats it.
    ShadowWolf01 ShadowWolf01 16-17, F 1 Response Jan 5

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    I hate my body. And the crazy part is,

    people tell me I'm hot all the time. I just don't see it. When I look in the mirror, all I see is how fat I look. It makes me really depressed sometimes. I consider becoming anorexic a lot. If I don't eat, then I won't feel discusting. I know it bad not to eat and it will just...
    Tiffanyportelli Tiffanyportelli 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 17, 2014

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    I'm a recovering suicide survivor with BDD

    and severe depression. I think I've got the hang of handling this thing. For anyone who has questions I'd be happy to answer them to the best of my ability.
    YourMayaBear YourMayaBear 16-17, F 2 Responses Mar 6

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    Today my BDD is acting up extremely bad,

    I hate mirrors and I feel completely fat. I hate this constant feeling of sadness hurt, fatness and ugliness. I really wish I didn't have BDD it's the only thing that runs through my head from the moment I wake up to the moment I close my eyes. I don't want to take meds I need...
    TattedPrincess89 TattedPrincess89 26-30, F 4 Responses Jan 16, 2014

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    21 male, just finished University.

    Always been a self conscious person, looked extremely young until about 16 and still look younger than my age. Always had this obsession with my face and hair and constantly have to touch and look in any reflection, which I know is an odd thing to do. People think it's vanity...
    hewitt101 hewitt101 22-25, M Jul 1

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    Never would I have believed,

    not in a million years, that there was some mental disorder out there that could completely destroy someone, inside and out. Now, it's getting harder to look in the mirror at my drug addicted, depressed, and suicidal self. But it's not like looking in the mirror is easy for me...
    joshknows66 joshknows66 13-15, M Feb 9

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