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I Have Body Dysmorphic Disorder

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 690 People

    I Love How I Look

    I could look at my mirror all day making facial expressions and checking out myself. I find flaws, but I still see myself as irresistible. Then I take out my phone to take some selfies and I just cant believe how ugly I look, how ****** my body is. My face is filled with black...
    JackedHueMan JackedHueMan 36-40, M Nov 16, 2013

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    I Just Wanna Be Happy

    I thought I'd "just" be depressed (doctors said I'd have a bipolar disorder) but since my bf tells me constantly how much my looks seem to affect my mood, I realised that he's absolutely right and I started thinking that I might have BDD. I suffered from anorexia 1,2 years ago...
    Slania Slania 22-25, F 3 Responses Sep 19, 2013

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    I Have Body Dysmorphic Disorder

    Body Dysmorphic Disorder controls my entire life. I've had it ever since I was 12. It started out as OCD when I was 5, then BDD at 12.Most days when I look in the mirror, I see a creature, an ugly monster. I see this horrible image, that makes me so extremely stressed out and...
    hope2929 hope2929 31-35 14 Responses Mar 30, 2010

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    UCLA Research To Better Understand Body Dysmorphic Disorder

    Our Research Aim: To better understand how visual and emotional information is processed in people with body dysmorphic disorder and those with anorexia nervosa, and how this relates to the symptoms they experience. UCLA Research Study for Adults (18-30) with Body Dysmorphic...
    lportnoff lportnoff 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 22, 2013

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    (I Do Not Own Anything)

    Mirror, Mirror by xXxHeatherAnnxXx (from devian art) That girl you see, look at her face. Not an imperfection lies in place. Look into her eyes so bright, Look closer, something isn't right. In her distorted mind, this young girl, Dwells a fear that others see mutations, Enough...
    marylight098 marylight098 13-15, F 1 Response Dec 2, 2013

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    Body Dysmorphic Disorder is something

    which I do tend to struggle with, finding something to wear is an absolute nightmare as so is catching a glimpse of my body in the mirror. After recovering from anorexia nervosa I have experienced drastic changes in my body shape which of course, has been a challenge to adapt...
    lillybet007 lillybet007 18-21, F Jan 19

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    This Is The Worst Disease

    I have been dealing with this for years now, I'm a little ashamed to say but yes I am a man, some man I am, When I was 17 I started to find my flaws because I was curious as to why I was getting such limited attention from women. It was my nose that I was concerned with and its...
    iknowhowyoufeel490 iknowhowyoufeel490 22-25, M 7 Responses May 3, 2012

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    I think I have Body Dysmorphic Disorder

    but I am not convinced because the mirror tells a different story. This is my reality. Am I hallucinating when I look in the mirror? I am completely convinced I am hideous. Each mirror and photograph tell a different story. My symptoms include constant checking, obsessing...
    jennjane115 jennjane115 36-40, F 1 Response Dec 10, 2013

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    Im 19. I was just at the prime of my beauty.

    I was never so into my beauty because i got made fun of all my life for being soo skinny and tall. i had so much self hate for my self, although one thing i had was my beautiful face. Right when i was getting more comfortable with my looks and my face was at that "pretty stage...
    kasssi kasssi 18-21, F Mar 31

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    I Suffer From Bdd And It's Killing Me

    Hello.  I'm a 24 year old female. I have BDD for almost a year now. I couldn't explain in words how much it hurts me, how much I hate myself and how much it absolutely ruins my life. Before it was ok. I had a nose job done, since i thought it was too long. But back then I...
    OfftheBeatenPath OfftheBeatenPath 26-30, F 24 Responses Jun 14, 2010

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    Depressed and Stressed

    I struggle everyday to walk out of my house. I feel ugly. I have had  suicidal thoughts, often. I, recently, was diagnosed with major depression which I believe is a branch of the panic disorder/generalized anxiety and body dysmorphic disorder. I have not...
    jennc55 jennc55 26-30, F 8 Responses Sep 7, 2009

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    It Gets Better!

    I've suffered with BDD for as long as I can remember. When I was very young I used to draw faces and cut them out, wearing them for days until they became as ugly as I thought I was. I wanted to change everything about myself. My name, my face, my body... to some point? I still...
    ThisIsMediocritiesOldAcc ThisIsMediocritiesOldAcc 18-21, F Jan 23, 2013

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    I hate seeing myself in the mirror

    and when i look at other people it's as though everyone around me looks better than i do and thus i feel even worse....
    RolSnS RolSnS 18-21, M 1 Response Feb 16

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    I feel worthless because I am a 21-year-old girl

    and my boyfriend told me that girls lose their looks and "go downhill" when they're only 25, and have had this fact validated by several health websites. I have been so depressed about only have 4 more years of my prime, and do not even know if life is worth living. I feel...
    lonewolf24769 lonewolf24769 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 13

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    I am doing some research into this this

    disorder in Ireland and would love to speak with sufferers in order to get the best insight. Anyone willing to converse with me?
    LibbyMc LibbyMc 36-40, F 1 Response Mar 14

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    I lost a ton of weight,

    I felt like I was looking good. But I don't have perfect pecs and I think my head is too big. I also always feel like when I eat non healthy food my face gets fatter. I know I sound like a girl, it's hard to say this to people. I know people don't notice the changes I notice...
    tomcunnington tomcunnington 18-21, M 1 Response Jan 10

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    I cry and cry because I feel fat a lot of the

    time but I realize that the way I see myself is wrong. It's a skewed perception of what I actually am. Once I compare myself to another person in real life I feel disgusting. I feel like I'm all skin and bones and it makes me want to vomit. Sometimes I constantly look for...
    gabbybreeelle gabbybreeelle 13-15, F Dec 26, 2013

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    They put me on medication

    and I went from one extreme to another. I started not caring about anything. Sick of dealing with this I just want to know what its like to feel normal again.
    lifewithBDD lifewithBDD 22-25, F Mar 6

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    I'm Losing Myself

    Nothing seems to be getting better at the minute.. I have acne which is my main concern. It's not too bad, just mild but really bothers me. The only other issue I had on my face was my nose and it took me years to come to terms with it and still today I get self conscious over it...
    Emma93 Emma93 18-21, F Nov 9, 2013

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    I Hate Myself...

    I'm sure my story is similar to many other peoples.I was bullied in school from the age of 8 till I left school, people made fun of my voice and my looks (I was called ugly, minging etc)I don't remember any time I have felt comfortable with how I look. I am engaged and my fiance...
    Callapink Callapink 22-25, F 1 Response Sep 17, 2011

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    I Am Dying With It, Yet Cant Live Without It.

    It's both frustrating and confusing to know that the world sees a different person when they look at me than I do. A lot of people don't take me seriously when I tell them about my BDD... They either don't believe me, and assume that I'm just seeking some sort of attention, or...
    OblitusAuri OblitusAuri 18-21, F 23 Responses May 1, 2010

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    BDD Is Ruining Me

    Ive been suffering with BDD for about 4 years now but in the past 2 years its become unbearable. I honestly feel like the ugliest human alive and its ruining me. I think it started when i became very conscious of how short i am (5ft) and its just built from there. Now i honestly...
    Laurymitt Laurymitt 18-21 6 Responses Jun 30, 2013

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    I am 26 and I have had bdd

    for 9 years. I hate my face. I cannot look in a mirror or see a picture of myself or I will get very depressed. I have not looked in a regular mirror in at least 7 years. My mirror is covered in hairspray and I have very dark lighting in the room I get ready in. People who look...
    cricht05 cricht05 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 18

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    Blehhh

    I constantly check my appearance in the mirror and I don't like my body. :/
    Mrocto Mrocto 18-21, M 1 Response Nov 8, 2013

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    I've always been a quiet not

    so secure person since my earliest memories I first discovered my body dysmorphic disorder in 9th grade (3 years ago) I just couldn't go to school my body was telling me no but I didn't know why yet after a few weeks of being house bound I saw true life: I hate my face on MTV...
    highheelsandtattoos highheelsandtattoos 16-17, F Feb 19

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    Bdd

    Yesterday, I read the body dysmorphic disorder description and I guess, this is what I had. I'm good now or I may think, I'm better!!!  :)
    Whateverrrrr Whateverrrrr 36-40, F 3 Responses May 11, 2011

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    I've been battling with hating myself

    for a very long time, years! And it's all now become too much, it's ruining my relationship.. So I've decide to finally seek help by talking to people with the same problem as me. It's occurred to me before that I may have BDD but I just thought I was being silly and that's what...
    belle87 belle87 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 23

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    Please Dont Say Im Vain

    Im not. I hate myself so much. Last night I was skyping with my girlfriend. I kept lookibg at myself and pointing my nose upward with my finger. (when I was young I wanted a cute nose and when I asked my parents about it they said it was like a witch nose a "garza" nose) She told...
    Sadlena Sadlena 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 14, 2013

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    Hi, I'm obsessed with my skin,

    bdd ruined my life, I became socially isolated therefore depressed. Used to be normal though. Quit law school. I feel miserable. In mind, if my skin is not perfect women will reject me and I'll be alone the rest of my life. I've never met someone in the same situation ( or...
    Isolated86m Isolated86m 26-30, M Mar 22

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    BDD takes over me. Today is a very bad day.

    It's so hard to hide my problem. I hate that every day I can't look in the mirror if I have a huge sweater and pants on, a towel on my head and globbing on the make up. I hate my thin, short hair, I hate my acne face, I hate my big nose, my white skin, my fat arms, my fat...
    lwuisman lwuisman 22-25, F 3 Responses Jan 31

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    It's come back again :( For the past few

    months I've felt a little more free from the disorder. Heck, I even managed to convince myself one time that I was probably almost cured. I got a bad haircut in October last year and hated it. I was unhappy inside but managed to tell myself I would get braids the next time and...
    fluffyunicorn fluffyunicorn 16-17, F Jan 5

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    Vixen2010 Vixen2010 22-25, F 2 Responses Mar 12

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    The Boy In The Mirror

    I have been to the end of the earth and back because of BDD. It started when I was a child and has progressed to the point where I will not go outside on some days because I don't want people to see my face and body. The worst of it has been in the last year. I actually did not...
    adamZ2 adamZ2 22-25, M 3 Responses Jul 8, 2010

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    Today my BDD is acting up extremely bad,

    I hate mirrors and I feel completely fat. I hate this constant feeling of sadness hurt, fatness and ugliness. I really wish I didn't have BDD it's the only thing that runs through my head from the moment I wake up to the moment I close my eyes. I don't want to take meds I need...
    TattedPrincess89 TattedPrincess89 22-25, F 3 Responses Jan 16

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    I'm 20 years old, a university student

    undertaking a job at the same time and constantly on the go. I've always had problems with facing pictures of myself, spending ridiculous amounts of time looking in the mirror at everything that irritates me and not sleeping for attempting to change what I dislike through...
    Wild93 Wild93 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 8

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    :'(

    I feel like a monster who cannot be seen or talk to, or people will judge her...
    marylight098 marylight098 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 25, 2013

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    How Can You Have Bdd and Date?

    Hello, this is my first entry on this site, and I am happy to have found a place where I'm not the only person who feels like this. I have been dealing with BDD since I was 14, or 15. I'm 23 now, and I can honestly say it gets worse with age. I know a lot of ppl say they are...
    remy90 remy90 22-25 24 Responses Jul 6, 2008

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    I've been dealing with BDD

    for about seven years. It started when I was 21. I couldn't handle going to school anymore and quickly flunked out. Then I couldn't handle work very well and got fired from my job. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me until I was like 25. Luckily I've managed to...
    igotthis3 igotthis3 26-30, M Mar 9

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    Hating Myself Is Draining Me...

    Hi, I have lived with BDD since I was 14 (now I am 28) and I cant get that feeling out of my head of always feeling UGLY. I am always late because I have to keep checking OVER AND OVER again and then I get in a panic because I am convinced I look like a beach whale and as soon...
    lovehatediva lovehatediva 22-25, F 9 Responses Oct 27, 2009

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    Facial Assymetry

    I was a very pretty girl. I would get compliments daily. I have long black hair, olive skin and exotic looking. I used to model. I got a bad outbreak of acne in my early 20's. A few months ago, i got silikon 1000 for my acne scarring from a very reputable doctor in New york...
    msmmm msmmm 26-30, F 1 Response Sep 2, 2013

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    I Have BDD, And I Wish I Had More People To Talk To About It.

    Hi, My name is Alison and I'm from Seattle. I've had BDD probably since I was a teenager, but I wasn't officially diagnosed with it until I started college (i'm 27 now). I was spending hours in the bathroom (sometimes from 9:00 PM to 4:30 AM) just looking at my teeth, and how...
    aliseattle aliseattle 26-30 3 Responses Oct 12, 2013

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    Facial Hatred

    The vast majority of the time I want to rip my face off. Extreme, yes but I cannot even think about myself without wanting to vomit
    brogues brogues 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 16, 2010

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    Seeing Something No One Around Me Understands

    I am a 16 year old guy, and have struggled with this horrendous BDD for years. When I was a kid, i didnt pay much attention to my looks, but I was teased for being fat, although it didnt bother me. Around middle school I started to worry more and more about my looks. I...
    Lostkid16 Lostkid16 16-17, M 3 Responses Jun 29, 2013

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    I'm Ready to Admit I Have Bdd

    I can't believe it has taken me so long to admit this, but I have to admit it to someone.  I've lived over 40 years with what I believe is BDD.   I can go through great periods where I am fine and then something with set me off and I will start to fall apart...
    mimi28 mimi28 41-45, F 15 Responses Jun 7, 2009

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    Relationships And Bdd

    I have BDD and my boyfriend of (going on) 2 years knows it's truly real and can take over my day if not my life for weeks on end. I am not sure how he can handle it or how well he really does but he makes a true effort to try to understand where i am coming from and what i see...
    lisra lisra 18-21, F 11 Responses Nov 16, 2010

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    Who Is That Girl In The Mirror?

    I was hesitant to write my story because I have had someone recently just flat out tell me I'm making it up. God I wish I was making it all up. I was afraid to write it because I have a huge fear of rejection as I'm sure many of you do suffering from BDD. And if people started...
    xxevilxangelxx xxevilxangelxx 22-25, F 7 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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    It feels weird that I've actually gotten to a

    stage where I feel the need to post about this. As I've grown up over the past few years I've become far more aware of how ridiculous many things are - how women are airbrushed to perfection in media, how conventionally attractive people are treated altogether differently from...
    mimimoon mimimoon 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 22, 2013

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    Body Dysmorphic Disorder - My Story ..

    My name is Claire , I'm 16 years old and I have Body Dysmorphic Disorder, anorexia , social phobia and  anxiety / panick attacks ...i know , its alot.   I am currently in grade 11 . I guesss this all started in grade 7 or 8 ...i became anorexic first . And I suppose when i...
    BDD007 BDD007 18-21, F 5 Responses Jun 13, 2012

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    New To Bdd

    My name is Kat and I have had BDD my entire life. I'm finally deciding at the age of 21 to get help for this disorder because it has progressively gotten worse and I never even knew it existed. I wasn't diagnosed until now because I never spoke up about my symptoms since i feel...
    katinthehat3 katinthehat3 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 3, 2012

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    I was recently diagnosed

    and was looking to talk to anyone who is dealing with the same thing. Please message me. Thanks
    lifewithBDD lifewithBDD 22-25, F Feb 14

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    Too Ugly For Love

    The ugliness started when i was in junior school, children started bullying and calling me names of how ugly i am, I remeber one time going back to school , a bunch of kids were walking behind me , singing a song about me , making fun of my ugliness, so i start running , i even...
    theladyugly theladyugly 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 15, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    Hi there. I'm 18 and I was told by my therapist that I have BDD (Body Dysmorphic Disorder). I have had a terrible self image for as long as I can remember. I don't remember a time...
    agolden agolden 16-17, F 5 days ago

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    Hmm well hello, my name is Melissa and I have Dissociative Identity Disorder, uhm and I'm not the main Alter of this body, and well because of that I dont have much time of my own...
    fairyMelissa fairyMelissa 13-15, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    I have an eating disorder, but know one in my family takes me seriously. I know I have Binge Eating Disorder and I have had it for a long time now. I can't stop putting food in my...
    Marisa67002 Marisa67002 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 27

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    I have had this disorder sense middle school (and I am now 22). Many people could never diagnoss my condition because I could never completely describe it nor did I trust others...
    LiliumxoTears LiliumxoTears 22-25, M 3 Responses Mar 31

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    Recently been told I may have Borderline Personality Disorder. It's not a confirmed diagnosis yet, but I'm pretty sure I have it, definitely makes more sense to me than the...
    atremain atremain 18-21, F Apr 3

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