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I Have Borderline Personality Disorder

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 6,672 People

    Do any of you guys find yourself easily

    obsessed with subjects, ppl, objects. places ect. ??
    BeautifullySickkk BeautifullySickkk 31-35, F 3 Responses a week ago

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    Rev #1 Normal

    Normal? Normal: A self-created standard in the American household. Is there any idea left such as this? It was as if I craved nothing more than to be considered as so. It has no meaning left to someone in a world so full of ever-changing standards. In my mind I was far from the...
    LostInBPD LostInBPD 22-25, M 10 Responses Feb 6, 2013

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    two days ago i was ready to divorce my husband.

    this am, he made love to me and i loved it. i don't want a divorce. i want security. i don't want to talk to anyone else in the mornings but him but i also don't want to have to worry how the mortgage will be paid. it sucks to have such a biological need for security but then...
    LITVET LITVET 41-45, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    I hate this feelings.

    Idk what's triggering all these bad feelings in me today but I wish I never woke up from my sleep. I just wanna be alone but I wanna talk. I feel hatred but then again I don't. I wanna hit something but I don't wanna hurt anything myself.~ I just wanna cry and vent but I really...
    xMellowButterflyx xMellowButterflyx 18-21, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I've noticed that my borderline traits pretty

    much go away when I'm not in a relationship, but as soon as I fall in love I go crazy. Having bpd is hell, I'd rather be single and not have to deal with it.
    Rosaalie Rosaalie 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 9

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    My Final Ep Story

    Well everyone, I found what I was looking for. I didn’t even realize I was looking for anything, or that it would take so damn long to find. But I found it. Peace. I’m finally at peace with everything. With myself, my future, my political beliefs, my religious beliefs...
    tangledx22 tangledx22 22-25, F 7 Responses Mar 10, 2012

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    Is there anyone here

    who has had another former or co existing diagnosis with borderline personality disorder? I was diagnosed with Autism in my childhood but one psychologist I see thinks I have borderline and not Autism.
    rainbowsmangos2015 rainbowsmangos2015 22-25, F 16 hrs ago

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    If you want to what Borderline Personality

    feels like watch the links below. It'll give you an inside look. Watch "Borderline Personality Disorder - What it feels like" on YouTube - https://youtu.be/PzpIzXShHeg Watch "Borderline Personality Disorder" on YouTube - https://youtu.be/KeQuZyTkyFw
    BeautifullySickkk BeautifullySickkk 31-35, F 1 Response a week ago

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    I've Noticed Something...

    That infuriates me to the core. (Isn't uncontrollable anger a symptom? Hahaaaaaa, I don't care.) It seems that whenever BPD is brought up by someone who does not have it or has witnessed emotionally distraught/unstable people that do have BPD, it's always "Run for the hills! They...
    AmandaMarlee AmandaMarlee 18-21, F 6 Responses May 12, 2013

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    One of the hardest things about it is not

    really knowing who yiu truly are
    yesiigarciaa yesiigarciaa 18-21, F 2 Responses Dec 25, 2014

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    i dont feel like writng

    as nothing seems to help im having trouble getting up to face the day dont feel like showering yesterday was different the nothing helps i feel nothing i geel like nothing so lonely i feel likeim stubborn just dont want to the work anymor eits too hard im tired of this anyone...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F Aug 23

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    It's ironic how I can be completely ruthless to

    some people whereas I can be very gentle, accepting and kind towards those I have chose to cherish.
    Calamityy Calamityy 22-25, M 1 Response Aug 24

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    This is a lil excerpt from a comment I made.

    "you can over come it. its a matter of retraining ur brain. and reassuring urself. what ur experiencing is probably not real.like for instance she he said he'd call back in 10 mins and now its been an hr. and our thoughts start thinking. "oh god he's tired of me. he doesn't...
    BeautifullySickkk BeautifullySickkk 31-35, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I am (almost can't believe it) peaceful

    since yesterday night and today.I am usually a lot of emotions,but never peaceful,never.The instances where I have been peaceful,I can probably count them on my fingers.Usually peace in me ,is replaced by emptiness,hollowness,and a yearning for something i don't understand,like...
    aquabunny aquabunny 22-25, F 3 Responses Mar 3

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    I hate how I can feel a sad episode coming on

    yet there is nothing I can do to stop it from coming.
    aligain aligain 31-35, F 1 Response Sep 7, 2014

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    I was diagnosed with bpd over a year ago.

    I am currently dealing with a flood of self judgment after finding out my kids father is engaged now I am struggling to not make this about me. I can't even type right now because I have a lot of distractions around me and in my mind. This too shall pass.
    ms5271115 ms5271115 36-40, F 1 Response Aug 19

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    How do you deal with getting pushed away?

    It's hard to even survive those moments.
    Calamityy Calamityy 22-25, M 2 Responses 20 hrs ago

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    I may be a sadistic borderline

    but at least I wouldn't lie, betray or cheat the people I cherish (even if it is a few). I wonder who the real animals are.
    Calamityy Calamityy 22-25, M 23 hrs ago

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    I'M Scared.

    I'm having trouble figuring myself out, who I am or what I want to be. I'm trying to make friends and keep them and have something more than what I know I'm not happy with now. I'm very depressed, I'm confused, I'm unable to see the positive side of things. It's scaring me...
    Iyric Iyric 18-21, F 24 Responses Feb 5, 2013

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    Does anyone else constantly feel like you're

    not good enough, not important enough, not loved enough when you're in a relationship, even if the person you're with does all they can to show you otherwise? I have this feeling of desperation that I can't let go of.. He has so many friends and he's always so busy, and I just...
    Rosaalie Rosaalie 18-21, F 11 Responses Apr 23

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    Nothingness!!! I woke up to flat,

    numb, nothingness. As much as I hate being manic or on a really bad low I think id rather have either of them right now. This feeling or lack of feeling I really cant handle, I hate this and I dont know how to deal with it!!!
    LJglasgow LJglasgow 26-30, F 2 Responses Aug 24

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    Escape From Borderland

       I wrote an essay on borderline personality disorder awhile ago, I hope it helps some of you. I realize that it's kind of long but I included some information as well as my experience with it. Enjoy!!      A person...
    Skyyyy Skyyyy 18-21, F 25 Responses Jun 16, 2010

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    Like the Hoover Dam Collapsed...

    I have no idea how long I have had BPD, but I've known what it was for eight years now. I started working to fix myself from that moment on. For about five years, I have felt like it was completely under control. But then yesterday was a bad day. Subjectively I can look at it...
    onceandfutureglow onceandfutureglow 31-35, F 45 Responses Apr 1, 2008

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    I first started to notice I wasn't 'normal'

    when I was 14 years old. I would flip out so quickly over small things, and I don't mean just have a temper tantrum.. I would break things, punch walls, scream, scratch myself and pull my hair out. It was like I wasn't in my body and couldn't control it. I then started to drink...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses a week ago

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    "To love is a dangerous path

    for me." —Michael (Me)
    Calamityy Calamityy 22-25, M 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    Yeah I remember why I don't let myself feel

    for ppl. Ppl will always cause you pain. It's best to just wall yourself up and stay in your cell alone and lonely. It's a duller pain. Anyone else feel this way??
    BeautifullySickkk BeautifullySickkk 31-35, F 3 Responses 4 days ago

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    I have had so much to be ungrateful

    and so very little to be thankful for.. I am living in a world where i am not in control.. I hate everything about my stupid illness and i cant seem to get away from it.. To get away from my mind that seems to take everything from me.. Look at me? Can you look me in the eye and...
    xxcaylaxx xxcaylaxx 16-17, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    I am have been diagnosed

    as with borderline personality disorder last year.Such a relief.I think I have had it for 10 years and have inherited it from my mother.Who I forgive,If she goes through that much emotional pain as me,I forgive her. We tend to bear more than we can actually take.Very few people...
    aquabunny aquabunny 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 9

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    Alone With Bpd

    I was just recently diagnosed with BPD after a third suicide attempt. I was diagnosed as Bipolar considering my father was Bipolar and shot himself a few years ago. I am 26 years old and so far my life has been filled with pain no matter how much I try to fight it. I have been on...
    lissa lissa 46-50, F 11 Responses Jun 15, 2007

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    Borderline Are Extremely Intelligence And Creative.

    Borderline are extremely intelligence and creative. We struggle to create and give birth to ourselves through our work and intellectual pursuit instead of mundane (...) normal people standards. Everyday, Every Night, we splinted and twisted into multiple personalities that...
    triratna triratna 31-35 3 Responses Oct 5, 2013

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    Hi all! I do not have BPD

    but I am getting worried about Sarah, who is a friend of mine, and I am wondering if you could please help me? I think she has BPD because of the following and I would like your input, please: 1) Sarah was always very moody during her teen years but during her adult life her...
    Thia999 Thia999 56-60, F 3 Responses Aug 21

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    BPD. A disorder that is relatively common,

    but can ruin a life in a matter of months. My life was ruined, but a lot of people don't understand how. I have no friends, and have been in multiple abusive situations. Verbal and sexual. Do you know whats it's like to have to explain to people when they ask about the scar...
    annfgates annfgates 18-21, F 7 Responses Feb 8, 2014

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    I hate my husband today!

    I wish he would pay for what he has done.
    arachmichel arachmichel 26-30, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    Question- has anyone found any good coping

    strategies that help them deal with BPD ?
    LJglasgow LJglasgow 26-30, F 3 Responses Aug 20

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    You want true love but true love with only

    that person, I don't care if someone else offers me anything it has to be that person.
    Calamityy Calamityy 22-25, M 4 hrs ago

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    It sucks. If you even feel a tinge of

    abandonment, you turn into this insecure, self-destructive monster. You start fights or start thinking that it'll never end & everyone will leave. You start wondering if you're even good enough. I hate it. I hate this feeling.
    Susananais Susananais 22-25, F 2 Responses Sep 1, 2014

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    I think because of bpd,

    when I experience any thoughts of judgments against myself, they are magnified by ten. The father of my three children is engaged to be married. I want to be genuinely happy for him because he is a good father and man. My thoughts are attacking each other. Half my thoughts...
    ms5271115 ms5271115 36-40, F 2 Responses Aug 20

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    In the past month, a lot has happened.

    I'll warn you in advance that this is a long post, but I think it might help some of you to feel less alone. I hope it does. So. I dated a guy named Shawn for about 5 months last year. One day, he told me he had been talking about our relationship problems with his female...
    Rosaalie Rosaalie 18-21, F 6 Responses May 10

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    I have not been diagnosed officially,

    but both my psycholigist and psychiatrist believe that I have a personality disorder. My psycholigist thinks it may be Bi-Polar II but does not want to make a diagnosis until I am through the grieving process. Reading up on and looking at the boards on various sites and reading...
    Myzery Myzery 31-35, F 2 Responses Aug 21

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    Well, I did it again.

    I let my thoughts bubble up into a fit of rage. I am so bitter and cold today. It all started this morning. Waking up , realizing this is it for now. I am stuck at home almost always. This doesn't bother me everyday because I love being a full time mom. What I don't love is...
    ashless ashless 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 29, 2014

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    Calamityy Calamityy 22-25, M 1 Response 6 days ago

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    Idk what happened I suddenly feel like wanting

    to die..I feel weal and tired..I wanna be alone but at the same time I want someone to tell me it'll pass and everything is gonna be okay..Idk why it had to be tonight that I feel like this again..it's been so long..I don't know what to do..
    DalaKumono DalaKumono 18-21, F 3 Responses 11 hrs ago

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    Calamityy Calamityy 22-25, M 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    I think one of the hardest parts about 'having

    borderline' (I say it like this because you are of course not defined by it) is that you have this chronic feeling of inadequacy. This of course makes you prone to being jealous and obsessive. I absolutely hate it....I never want to ever get into a relationship again as I know...
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Aug 24

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    Those of us who suffer BPD know

    where hell really is. It's inside us. No escaping the agony, pain and torture. No reprieve. It's in every moment of our day, our dreams and our thoughts. It infects everything. It controls everything. It poisons every aspect of our life. It must be the loneliest condition there...
    AussieAZ AussieAZ 41-45, M 4 Responses Aug 28, 2014

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