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I Have Borderline Personality Disorder

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 6,513 People

    My Final Ep Story

    Well everyone, I found what I was looking for. I didn’t even realize I was looking for anything, or that it would take so damn long to find. But I found it. Peace. I’m finally at peace with everything. With myself, my future, my political beliefs, my religious beliefs...
    tangledx22 tangledx22 22-25, F 7 Responses Mar 10, 2012

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    i am afraid of people.

    ..being around them, talkng to them... is anyone else this way? if so...how do you deal with it?
    bloodRedd bloodRedd 26-30, F May 15

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    I hate how I can feel a sad episode coming on

    yet there is nothing I can do to stop it from coming.
    aligain aligain 31-35, F 1 Response Sep 7, 2014

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    SoulSearcherLover SoulSearcherLover 18-21, F 2 Responses May 11

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    Feeling like everyone is a trigger.

    .. The simplest thing is irritating more than usual. 😩 the weather is too nice for this.
    deleted deleted 26-30 May 4

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    I just have to accept the fact

    that no guy is ever gonna want to keep me around. I used to say I live for love, and now i don't know what the **** I live for. Life is one ****** up cycle of ****** up **** happening in ****** up orders because of ****** up circumstances and everything is ******. And I feel...
    Rosaalie Rosaalie 18-21, F 10 Responses Nov 12, 2014

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    I recently started therapy up again

    and that seems to be helping tremendously. Socially and mood wise I have been a lot more outgoing and grounded This is such a change from the last 3 yrs of my life. I also met a really great guy and we seem to be hitting it off. What's better is he is encouraging that we take...
    poodahpop poodahpop 18-21, T 1 Response May 17

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    Escape From Borderland

       I wrote an essay on borderline personality disorder awhile ago, I hope it helps some of you. I realize that it's kind of long but I included some information as well as my experience with it. Enjoy!!      A person...
    Skyyyy Skyyyy 18-21, F 24 Responses Jun 16, 2010

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    Ah,so shared vision turns out my founder is

    delusional.He wants this grand idea of a vision to be executed and cant even put a ******* business plan. Meanwhile he is derailing all my ideas as lame,won't work,blah blah,and taking ones he likes to talk to specific mentors who will give him intel who will then mysteriously...
    aquabunny aquabunny 22-25, F 1 Response May 13

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    I'm really trying this time

    but if he does not walk out the door and leave me eventually he will die. So either way he will leave me.
    SirsKnottyGirl SirsKnottyGirl 26-30, F 1 Response May 13

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    i need to vent im feeling funny

    and screwed this is scarying me ihav eno energy no nothing i need to kick a ball no i nee dto kick people i dont know wha tim feeling im disconnected from em im feeling so screwed up that i could off myself right now
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F 3 days ago

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    Right now any time there is mention of death,

    my brain goes "that's a great idea, let's die, you want to die" which is highly unhelpful when you're trying to be happy. Why do I have to be like this?
    Ambernonymous Ambernonymous 18-21, F 2 Responses May 14

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    I am (almost can't believe it) peaceful

    since yesterday night and today.I am usually a lot of emotions,but never peaceful,never.The instances where I have been peaceful,I can probably count them on my fingers.Usually peace in me ,is replaced by emptiness,hollowness,and a yearning for something i don't understand,like...
    aquabunny aquabunny 22-25, F 3 Responses Mar 3

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    needing to vent not that it helps i was worried

    about brother as he hasnt been on face book i told him about mom hes i create drama all i did was reach out nobody see if he cares i hatew the mANstarts bringing up things like bad choices weve made and mu mpom that wa sher past 39 years ago react to him he said im not a...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F a week ago

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    Positive traits of those with BPD: 1.

    Passionate-experience extreme intensity of passion when we find something that interests us 2. Individual-strongly cultivate our individuality and enjoy applying our abilities to new tasks 3. Spontaneous-we live in the moment doing whatever it is we feel we want to do at that...
    kavlynn99 kavlynn99 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 21, 2014

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    Saw the movie shame.That is exactly how it is

    being borderline.I think I am somewhere in between.Being Demisexual,empath and borderline is a strange **** up of emotions.You have love addiction,you chase men like a drug,you fall for the ones who you know can't love you,yet you trade sex for a connect.And break down when it...
    aquabunny aquabunny 22-25, F 2 Responses May 8

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    does anyone know of or have experienced

    and can explain dissociation in relation to BPD to me? if u don't have an answer don't bother leaving a comment...no bs.
    bloodRedd bloodRedd 26-30, F 2 Responses May 3

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    Okay,so saw fatal attraction,

    and let me put out some stuff,as a bpd sufferer myself,I will never do,and it is very unlikely most average bpd people might. 1.I love animals.Absolutely love them,I was traumatized when she boiled that thing.I would never,ever,I mean ,come on! 2. I would never ,have never even...
    aquabunny aquabunny 22-25, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    I'm sorry. I'm sorry

    that you have to go through BPD And I'm sorry I have to go through BPD It's not easy at all. And it's hard for people to understand that what we do, or how we feel, it very hard for us to control. I'm sorry, you don't deserve to live with BPD I'm sorry, I don't deserve to live...
    betelgeusex3 betelgeusex3 22-25, F 1 Response May 24, 2014

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    Update....

    To all borderliners,I feel compelled to write to you, but what I want to say isn't clear yet in my head.  I'm just going to go with it.  Bear with me.For a couple of weeks I've been getting dialectical behaviour therapy, this is similar to CBT in as much as it teaches you...
    charlie248 charlie248 36-40, F 33 Responses May 8, 2012

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    I'm scared to be in friendships

    or relationships because I turn into an emotionally manipulative codependent mess and I don't want to ruin anybody
    borderlineeverything borderlineeverything 16-17, F May 15

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    One of the hardest things about it is not

    really knowing who yiu truly are
    yesiigarciaa yesiigarciaa 18-21, F 2 Responses Dec 25, 2014

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    Borderline Are Extremely Intelligence And Creative.

    Borderline are extremely intelligence and creative. We struggle to create and give birth to ourselves through our work and intellectual pursuit instead of mundane (...) normal people standards. Everyday, Every Night, we splinted and twisted into multiple personalities that...
    triratna triratna 31-35 3 Responses Oct 5, 2013

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    Alone With Bpd

    I was just recently diagnosed with BPD after a third suicide attempt. I was diagnosed as Bipolar considering my father was Bipolar and shot himself a few years ago. I am 26 years old and so far my life has been filled with pain no matter how much I try to fight it. I have been on...
    lissa lissa 46-50, F 11 Responses Jun 15, 2007

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    my borderline seems to differ in alot of ways

    from the experiences I'm reading. i have other issues that help to form this mess in my head but i dont identify with the normal discription of BPD.....i internalize everything. im not into manipulating others..myself...yea, i have to to get stuff done. i do have server...
    bloodRedd bloodRedd 26-30, F 2 Responses May 11

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    If you're in Northern New Jersey

    and have a high degree of empathy, join my meetup group. Http://meetup.com/NNJ-Empathy-Meetup/ We already have over 40 members. Our next Meetup is June 10 in Fairlawn, NJ and over 10 people have RSVPed. Why should you join our group? So that you can connect with similar...
    Roxvox Roxvox 31-35, F 2 days ago

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    wher eis everyone i feel like im carrying the

    world inside i feel like i cabt do this anymor ei went to the foodbank today walked alot and worke din friends store when im not well im tired i feel like i dont wan to grow up i just cant do this anymor e what do i do
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    sometimes i hate being on her enot you guys i

    have to force myself to i feel like crap nothing helps so much pain i want to give up i feel lost and i dont know waht im tired of people hurting ot abusing me i want peopel like that pay they are bad people i wan tto i feel ldea dand poison insid ei know i put myself to the...
    hannahabbie hannahabbie 46-50, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    nessa88 nessa88 26-30, F May 16

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    vishar vishar 18-21, M 1 Response May 14

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    Does anyone else constantly feel like you're

    not good enough, not important enough, not loved enough when you're in a relationship, even if the person you're with does all they can to show you otherwise? I have this feeling of desperation that I can't let go of.. He has so many friends and he's always so busy, and I just...
    Rosaalie Rosaalie 18-21, F 12 Responses Apr 23

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    I realize now how much having borderline

    personality puts a damper on your relationships. It makes everything feel so unstable. And it's like I am scared to lose anybody in my life, that I try too hard to make them stay and it ends up having the opposite effect. I used to think I was more than my mental illness. But I...
    KairiKipling KairiKipling 18-21, F 1 Response May 18

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    i just feel really bad today.

    ..i keep taking sleeping pills so that i will just go back to sleep but its not working....i wish i could disappear...i wish i was never born....i hate who i am. today is a really bad day, no amount of distraction is helping right now. i wish this would end....
    bloodRedd bloodRedd 26-30, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    im not sure i have bpd

    but this is the best category i could think to post in. i feel like a sheet of paper. blank. i emulate other people and fictional characters but they dont represent me. i feel like i am nothing. i... dont know how to explain myself
    gemmed gemmed 13-15, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    himenoko143 himenoko143 18-21, F 1 Response May 11

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    How Can You Bring Someone Into This Nightmare?

    I feel great now, and I'm determined to be better, but I know I'll fall. I know I'll make mistakes. How do I let someone close to me when I know I'll hurt them at some point and feel hurt by them? I'm so afraid I'm destined to forever be alone, just so I'm the only one hurt. I...
    chiamonkie chiamonkie 26-30, F 5 Responses Apr 1, 2012

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    It sucks. If you even feel a tinge of

    abandonment, you turn into this insecure, self-destructive monster. You start fights or start thinking that it'll never end & everyone will leave. You start wondering if you're even good enough. I hate it. I hate this feeling.
    Susananais Susananais 22-25, F 2 Responses Sep 1, 2014

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    I just hate feeling so alone

    but also feeling like its my fault.
    SoulSearcherLover SoulSearcherLover 18-21, F May 17

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    Borderline Personality Disorder.

    People with borderline personality disorder are unstable in several areas, including interpersonal relationships, behavior, mood, and self-image. Abrupt and extreme mood changes, stormy interpersonal relationships, an unstable and fluctuating self-image, unpredictable and self...
    ReachingNirvana ReachingNirvana 22-25, M 5 Responses Jun 2, 2014

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    bloodRedd bloodRedd 26-30, F May 13

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    Well, I did it again.

    I let my thoughts bubble up into a fit of rage. I am so bitter and cold today. It all started this morning. Waking up , realizing this is it for now. I am stuck at home almost always. This doesn't bother me everyday because I love being a full time mom. What I don't love is...
    ashless ashless 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 29, 2014

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    I am have been diagnosed

    as with borderline personality disorder last year.Such a relief.I think I have had it for 10 years and have inherited it from my mother.Who I forgive,If she goes through that much emotional pain as me,I forgive her. We tend to bear more than we can actually take.Very few people...
    aquabunny aquabunny 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 9

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    Anyone else have that one person in your life

    that you try to avoid because she triggers every emotion you try to bottle up? Her very presence ignites the most intense BPD emotions I've ever felt and somehow I can't get her out of my head.
    tribe1855 tribe1855 22-25, M 4 Responses May 10

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    To all the people who look down on,

    degrade and ridicule people with BPD I would like to invite you to come walk a mile in our shoes!
    Yu12 Yu12 26-30, M 4 Responses Sep 1, 2014

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    I've noticed that my borderline traits pretty

    much go away when I'm not in a relationship, but as soon as I fall in love I go crazy. Having bpd is hell, I'd rather be single and not have to deal with it.
    Rosaalie Rosaalie 18-21, F 3 Responses Mar 9

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    Like the Hoover Dam Collapsed...

    I have no idea how long I have had BPD, but I've known what it was for eight years now. I started working to fix myself from that moment on. For about five years, I have felt like it was completely under control. But then yesterday was a bad day. Subjectively I can look at it...
    onceandfutureglow onceandfutureglow 31-35, F 45 Responses Apr 1, 2008

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