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I Have Complex Ptsd

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 290 People

    Looking For Me

    I was raised in the country with my 3 siblings. Our mother incapable of showing love affection or attention. Our father was working a lot. The emotional neglect and physical was hard. At age 9 my eldest brother began sexually abusing me. This continued until I left home at 16. I...
    Julz68 Julz68 41-45, F 1 Response Jul 2, 2013

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    Owlmaid Owlmaid 26-30, F May 22

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    I've had Complex PTSD

    for over 15 years now and the more I understand myself,the more I feel detached from others. Being so self aware makes it hard to be present in the moment and enjoy life. I feel like I can only enjoy myself once I trust and that takes too long. I think now I'm not suffering from...
    purplesoc purplesoc 31-35, F 2 Responses Aug 27

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    Not Much Known About Cptsd

    I hate that cptsd cannot be officially diagnosed yet but soon it should be in the book the shrinks use to diagnose people. My therapist said he couldn't officially diagnose me but when it is available as a diagnosis he will change my current one. I'm a victim of childhood...
    ginger1776 ginger1776 18-21, F 8 Responses May 21, 2012

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      I'm new to this forum

    but I recently realized that I have C-PTSD. Does anyone else struggle with self-sabotage and fear of success? If so, how do you get through it in the day-to-day and long-term decisions? I thought I had made my way out of most of this garbage, but it has crept back in...
    PurplePaisley PurplePaisley 41-45, F 2 Responses May 20

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    Changing What I Do And Its Hard, Im Stuck

    I think it is part depression and partly I dont know where to start. I started neglecting things, like cleaning and cooking. That turned into avoiding, even avoiding showering, moving or talking. I go through it in my head how I need to atleast try to start doing things again...
    divisionbell divisionbell 26-30, F 3 Responses May 31, 2013

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    I've just gone through the CPT therapy program.

    .. and it has been extended. I just don't know what to do with myself. I'm not having extreme, mind-numbing flashbacks anymore, but I still don't feel "ok". I've started cutting again, something I haven't done in over 10 years. I'm a 30 year old, stay-at-home mother of two. I...
    smrt02 smrt02 26-30, F 3 Responses Jan 23

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    Trying To Numb The Pain

    Age 5: Developed trichotillomania, have been bullied, felt ugly, no self worth of self esteem.... worthless. traumatizing to experience for 14 years now Age 8: watched my grandaddy have a heart attack and die, lying on the pavement of my church parking lot in the rain, with...
    loveismyweapon94 loveismyweapon94 18-21, F 5 Responses Feb 24, 2013

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    Icu Ptsd? Is This Real?

    I relayed this story in the asthma section, but I think I may need to be here...I'm not sure. I had an asthma attack (the mother of all asthma attacks) on 9/29/10...As for the day it happened, I have only a vague memory of struggling to breathe, then no memory of this event...
    JulesInBmore JulesInBmore 51-55, F 3 Responses May 16, 2012

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    New And Scared

    I've only been newly diagnosed and my life suddenly makes sense although the complexity of PTSD scares me. My trauma is not what has been done to me rather the powerless I felt watching people I love suffer... My dad died when I was 14 then my mum and brother took it pretty hard...
    TrappedCinderella83 TrappedCinderella83 26-30, F 3 Responses May 28, 2013

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    I came to this earth

    as avery sensitive child . And my upbringing was of a constant hostile nature . My parents didnt get along at all . Father from finland adopted when he was 4 years ( must have been terribly hard ) and a martyr mother who did her best , but couldnt stand her situation . So she...
    ithunderhart ithunderhart 46-50, M Aug 25

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    Years Of Misdiagnosis Finally Lead Me To The Real Issue Of Complex Ptsd, And The Healing Begins

    I grew up in an abusive and neglectful environment. There was alot of emotional abuse as well. When i was 14 or so i called a crisis line and my parents enevitably took me. In retrospect i think they took me because they were afraid the authorities would find out what they where...
    acoumbe acoumbe 31-35, F 6 Responses Apr 12, 2012

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    Venting My Life

    Hi everyone, I just feel like getting all these thoughts out of my head. My problems started when I was 5 and my god brother molested me... He abused me form 5-7 years old. I repressed these memories until I was about 16. I had been cutting since I was about 12 but didn't know...
    TangledLife TangledLife 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 14, 2013

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    Why Try To Fix What Was Intentionally Broken

    As a child there was no hiding the fact that I wasn't wanted or I didn't come the way my parents had planned. Sorry no instructions to follow with me just two main rules. Don't lie to me and don't degrade me. I'm more intelligent than anyone gave me credit for, so instead they...
    justme8903 justme8903 22-25, F 1 Response Jun 20, 2013

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    Unfortunatley Unique

    I feel somewhat like a poser becausee my ptsd is not from a war or any battle like most cases. My story is of no significance when compared to those who served for our country but I really wanted to see if anyone could relate to me. My dad was abusive. He was very aggressive and...
    WhatNoOneKnows WhatNoOneKnows 16-17, F 6 Responses Oct 22, 2012

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    I Have Complex Ptsd Recently Diagnosed And My Husband Has Pd's, Helll-i'm-in-lllp!

    There's so much to say but I'd like to find some like minded folks first and foremost.  I want desperately to save this disfunctional marriage but it's pure chaos.  And I'm at my wits end.  While I am getting help from meds, psyc doc, therapist, counselors, pastors and all the...
    snowflakemommy snowflakemommy 41-45, F 3 Responses Mar 27, 2012

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    I have watched perks of being a wallflower

    maybe 20 times in the past year. Every time it's on I watch it and love it no matter where I join in on the story. I finally decided to read the book. Wow. I haven't cried while reading a book in a long time, but there are things that Charlie says that hit home with my C-PTSD...
    kodemore kodemore 31-35, M 1 Response Feb 14

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    From Verbal Abuse To Nervous Breakdown

    My mother used to yell at me randomly and weekly I felt as if I messed up in some small way that she would blow up at me. This happened all throughout college (which was her idea) and the first day of orientation I had a seizure due to stress which should've been a warning sign...
    jsummercole jsummercole 22-25, F 1 Response Sep 9, 2012

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    5th Year Of Therapy And There Seems To Be Light At The End Of The Tunnel

    Around the age of 28 after getting my career and in the midst of raising children, I started to feel like I wanted to bash my head off a wall. I went to my doc and he asked me a few questions, determined that I was depressed and prescribed me effexor. I remember asking him...
    Melaniethebutterflyqueen Melaniethebutterflyqueen 36-40 3 Responses Apr 27, 2013

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    Samcoyou Samcoyou 13-15, M 4 Responses Mar 5

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    Foreverfearful And Alone.

    My story is too long to write. My mother died before I was 18 months old. I never recovered from her loss. I was about to enter the childhood development state of autonomy. What happened after her death is my story. Left with an extremely abusive, alcoholic, sadistic...
    foreverfearful foreverfearful 56-60, F 4 Responses May 9, 2013

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    Complex........Ya More Like Complicated

    I am going through therapy. I attend group meetings and whoa lets talk about severe flashbacks happening.  I am almost afraid of spending time alone with myself.  I need constant distractions to keep my thoughts occupied.  Now even that is not working.  Poof ....just like...
    flodials flodials 41-45, F 1 Response Nov 18, 2013

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    Nothing New, But It's Still A Struggle

    I was diagnosed with CPTSD when I was 16 years old after a very turbulent childhood. I witnessed my father attempt to murder my mother on more than one occasion and we went into hiding after running out of the house. My father had also been near-fatally stabbed by a man and quite...
    ShadowMonster ShadowMonster 22-25, F 1 Response May 10, 2012

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    Life's Hurdles

    Hi thereI'm here to get some support, insight and converse with others that may be able to relate to PTSD... child sex abuse.. and infidelity.I'm a 28 year old female who has been battling with PTSD for the last year or so.. it's onset caused by the realisation that I was...
    Naturebaby85 Naturebaby85 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 11, 2013

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    Queries....

    i have many of the symptoms, and multiple decades of exposure.... not exactly post. but despite spending large amounts of time locked up, the acknowledgement that i will never be able to support myself and the only way to stop the cycle would be to die i never lost a sense of...
    derangedunit derangedunit 22-25, F 4 Responses Nov 3, 2013

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    Had an amazing therapy session yesterday.

    I've been drawing disturbing moments from my past and then we discuss them. It's more helpful than I could have possibly imagined.
    kodemore kodemore 31-35, M 1 Response Feb 4

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    A Simple Yes Or No Will Suffice...

    It was just a theory that my therapist recently had: that I was suffering from PTSD from a drug that I had taken in October 2012. Believe me, since October, my mind has been going insane with trying to figure out what is the matter with me. Constant panic attacks, constantly...
    lookingforsafety lookingforsafety 22-25, F 4 Responses Mar 10, 2013

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    Living With C-ptsd

    Hello! I'm Lily Scot and I'm just joining the forum. Last April I completed my most recent round of therapy, this time diagnosed with (complex) PTSD. Previous diagnoses have included generalized anxiety disorder, depression and addiction. I'm now well into recovery, but am...
    Lscot Lscot 61-65, F Oct 13, 2013

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    Am I Crazy?

    I've always considered myself to be a rational person who despite a traumatic childhood still was pretty sane. However, over the past ten years I found myself experiencing cracks in the armour so to speak. Every month I would have a reoccurring phase/episode which I entitled...
    Katrina888 Katrina888 36-40, F 2 Responses Jun 5, 2013

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    Since I'Ve Been To Therapy

    Hi to everyone, I've started therapy one and a half years ago. I started therapy because of chronic anxiety, Panic Attacks and insomnia plus periods of depression. What I didn't know back then was that I had PTSD. And since the wounds I had inside of me were childhood wounds...
    julie295 julie295 31-35, F 2 Responses Jun 5, 2013

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    C-ptsd ... What?

    Hi everyone, Last night I was officially diagnosed as having C-PTSD which I have only a basic understanding of, because well, my brain doesn't like to process new information at present. I have intense mood swings, from being happy and full of energy, to crashing down for days...
    ashleigh3160 ashleigh3160 22-25, F 2 Responses Nov 26, 2013

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    Just Got Diagnosed. No Help So Far.

    Since about six weeks I suffer from what is seen as (adult) c-ptsd. I did reach out for professional help but in my country (as elsewhere I guess) it is not so easy to find help or treatment. I seems I am through the period of flashbacks. Still I am loaded with the pain that came...
    1 Response Jan 16, 2013

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    Feeling It May Be Easier To Battle My Problems Alone

    I have been told time and time again that I cannot work through all of my issues alone. the fact behind that is, trying to battle it alone has gotten me into the hole im currently in today. Having a husband who trys to understand but just never fully gets my moods and episodes is...
    divisionbell divisionbell 26-30, F 3 Responses Jun 5, 2013

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    My Childhood Ruined Me

    My step-brother sexually abused me, my mom neglected me, my step-dad used to be a drunk and beat us. My sister killed herself but I still suffer and live in hell every day. I'm 39 and incapable of being in a relationship, trusting men, trusting people in general. I crave love but...
    MissTarya MissTarya 36-40, F 3 Responses Nov 13, 2013

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    Looking For Friends In Chicago

    I am looking for friends in Chicago. I've suffered from Complex Ptsd and attachment disorder for all but the first year or two of my life. My parents were very emotionally abusive, and my school situation was abusive too. I also had a very abusive relationship that added to my...
    dunderbeck5 dunderbeck5 36-40, M 1 Response Nov 2, 2013

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    I Am Not Crazy

    My PTSD is complex indeed. Its hard to be normal when so many abnormal things happen to you. I have been abused so many different ways before I really had a chance to live. Theres was no closure. Everyone has a logical reason as to why they hurt you or abandoned you. I just...
    loudsilence1 loudsilence1 26-30, F Jan 28, 2013

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    Part 2 When I entered 6th grade,

    my brother joined preschool. Our mother had already kept him at home a year and a half longer than other kids his age and it wasn't even because he had any developmental delays, but because she didn't want to deal with the responsibilities of both children in school yet. Sadly...
    inabetterplace inabetterplace 31-35, F 1 Response Mar 5

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    Part 1 I witnessed physical

    and verbal abuse between my parents since I can remember, memories from as long back as when I was 3. I was physically and verbally abused by both of them. Neither of them loved me or expressed any sort of affection towards me. When my younger brother was born, they neglected...
    inabetterplace inabetterplace 31-35, F 2 Responses Mar 5

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    I Don'T Even Know Where To Begin...

    It's been an ongoing on/off nightmare for as long as I've lived, but as of late, my situation has become even worse. I'm already in the process of foreclosure on my house, with a sale date set for the 8th of April; this is likewise the date of my court subpoena as a testifying...
    cabraverde cabraverde 41-45, F 2 Responses Mar 19, 2013

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    Never Joined A Support Forum

    I have Complex PTSD. However, I am hesitant to share my story because I don't want to just obsess over my past. I think it is dangerous indulgent behavior for me. I accept that the things that happened occurred but I worry about discussing details because in the past in group...
    bitealemon bitealemon 31-35, F 7 Responses Mar 1, 2013

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    New To Chat Rooms

    This is my first posting in any chat room. I have been in therapy for almost 6 months now, and attend one hour long sessions twice a week. I have been diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder as well as Complex PTSD. Although I truly do love my parents, I have learned that our...
    ceejaye ceejaye 36-40, F 1 Response Mar 16, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    Does anyone out there suffer from complex pads. I'm in an emotional flashback right now and feel small abandoned and powerless. If there is anyone out there suffering, I'd be glad...
    bennetts bennetts 41-45, F 4 days ago

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    Dont know what I would do without my dog
    BlackBlood64 BlackBlood64 18-21, F 2 Responses Aug 18

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    I have had complex PTSD for four years. I barely lived during a 22 hour long or more torture acts done to me. I was stabbed, waterboarded and revived several times, burned,etc...no...
    ashchris ashchris 31-35, F 1 Response Aug 20

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    Actually, C-PTSD. Does anyone else here have it? The "C" stands for complex, meaning my issues don't stem from a single event (i.e. an attack, short period of war) but rather...
    shelhart137 shelhart137 22-25, F 7 Responses Sep 8

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    My mother is a narcissist. My dad is her faithful enabler. They have been married for 52 years and to this day he does what she says. My mother was never home growing up. When...
    pistacchia pistacchia 46-50, F 1 hr ago

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    I literally am reading all these stories and my heart aches. I have been in two mental hospitals and been batteling depression for six years. I have cutt every place there is skin...
    Gonzales96 Gonzales96 18-21, F 3 Responses 7 hrs ago

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    Finally after years of suffering from debilitating depression, anxiety, panic attacks, flash backs, nightmares & living all day everyday with that terrible sense of dread in the...
    LunaGypsy LunaGypsy 31-35, F Aug 26

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    I know what its like, you're not alone. I've been in therapy for about 8 years now, and I still suffer. I, too, was abused by my family, friends, and even an entire town. Children...
    gwisforlovers gwisforlovers 31-35, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    I was diagnosed today for PTSD PASS & depression. My dr wants me to take an anti depression because I know I can't handle what's going on by myself.. But has anyone else tried more...
    kros10 kros10 26-30, F 2 Responses Aug 18

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    2 years ago I was attacked by my own family, a family member committed suicide then found a man hanging at work. All this happened in a matter of 6 months. I completely broke down...
    leesalush leesalush 36-40, F 2 Responses Aug 26

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    I was in my drivers ED class today and our teacher showed a video about organ donation.Aside from it being sad because a man died i was to busy trying to stop a PTSD attack from...
    ordinaryemma ordinaryemma 22-25, F 1 Response a week ago

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