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I Have Contemplated Suicide

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 123 People

    Thought About It, But Never Tried

    I'm not suicidal right now, but I have been. Sometimes I don't want to live, but I don't think I'd ever do it. I can take a lot of ****, as I have. I was about to, once, but I thought about the only friend I had, and didn't. I think that there is always something to look for...
    DarkSalem DarkSalem
    18-21, F
    1 Response Dec 31, 2007


      I was in Anger Management today and someone made a joke about being suicidal.  I got upset (not yelling or anything) and told him “That’s some serious ****, that you shouldn’t be joking about.”  He asked me why but I didn’t answer...
    JubjubBird JubjubBird
    31-35, M
    Sep 26, 2009

    Cant Get Better

    since 2007 been sick had chf,diebetes,kidney dieses,hypertension,sleep apena just tired of being sick and it seems they cant cure me on top of all that i have uncontrolable high blood pressure my life has not been the same im very unhappy always sick really want it all to end
    BBBn BBBn
    Aug 1, 2012

    Day In And Day Out

    I'm tired. i'm sooo tired of my life. i don't want it anymore.. i'm tired of letting people walk all over me. and yes i know i'm letting them. i just don't have the fight in me anymore to even bother. i take medicine everyday yet nothing seems to be helping. i go to work and...
    deleted deleted
    Feb 12, 2012

    I'd Be Lying

    if I said I hadn't. I'm here to express myself and be truthful about my life. And this is one aspect that I've only mentioned here and on my blogger blog that nobody reads. The thought has crossed my mind many, many, many times both recently and in the past. In all honesty, I...
    DietIcedTea DietIcedTea
    36-40, F
    1 Response Aug 26, 2009

    I suffer from Primarily Obsessional OCD (known

    as "pure-o") which first manifested itself when I was around 9. I was not diagnosed until I was 29 so for twenty years I suffered from horrific intrusive thoughts which made day to day life very difficult and which I have trouble talking about openly even now. When I was 29 my...
    EarthWalkerMan EarthWalkerMan
    31-35, M
    Jun 19, 2015

    I Get It!!

    I'm reading this thread and it totally makes sense and I can totally relate. Last time I really thought about suicide was one week before my brother died. I was totally thinking I could do it. I didn't see any other way out and my life was a mess. My job was going ok but I...
    deleted deleted
    Jan 26, 2012

    That's Way Behind Me Now

    Twice - once as a child, and once as an adult. The first time was to escape an unbearable situation forced upon me by my parents. The second time was to escape an unbearable situation forced upon me at work by many of my fellow employees.
    eleanorssong eleanorssong
    56-60, F
    Nov 20, 2011

    Not Anymore

    When i was in elementary school, i was a little over weight, but not by much. But i got teased soo much! that i was ready to leave this world entirely. But i am sooooooo glad i didn't, my life is amazing right now, great friends, great first boyfriend, School is going great, i...
    EveryoneNeedsAHug EveryoneNeedsAHug
    18-21, F
    Nov 27, 2010

    I Do Quite Often

    I thought something good was happening in my life, but it seems it has faded away. Just like everythng else does. I am resigned to living a life alone. I've had it with people. I've been through so much I can barely think straight anymore, or amuse or entertain myself. I just...
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Apr 25, 2010

    Forever Ago

    It was early on, right around the time she died. I'm really really not proud of this and am downright disgusted at myself for it. When she passed away I wanted to die, more than anything. I don't believe in god or an afterlife so it wasn't so I would be "with her" or...
    godsmack666 godsmack666
    18-21, M
    1 Response Mar 8, 2009

    I Just Give Up Sometimes

    Lately, suicide has been on my mind. I can't help it. It just comes to me.. you know? i go to therapy for anxiety and well my now known depression. I mean suicide seems like it be the right thing to do, but just actually doing it... its impossible. I cant imagine leaving my...
    Psychlover16 Psychlover16
    22-25, F
    Nov 27, 2010


    The last time i thought about suicide was monday. i almost went through with it to. for months ive been screwing up in my college, finacial stuff and my grades. and i was suposed to start my new semester tuesday, but i couldnt sign up for my classes becasue of how my fincial aid...
    Silent20 Silent20
    18-21, F
    Jan 19, 2012

    Rationally, On And Off

    I like to believe that I am thinking about this rationally. I like to believ1 that I'm being logical and that all this makes sense... But at the same time, I don't. To be honest, I really don't want to die. I want to be normal and functional. I just want everything to be okay...
    itsjustme1001 itsjustme1001
    22-25, F
    Feb 3, 2012

    Only Once, So Far...

    When I was 11, I had my aunt drive me to family services, shared some of my story and ended up with me brother and sister in foster care. I tried to stay in foster care but that system's primary function is to reunite families. During one of these brief foray's back into...
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses Nov 11, 2011

    I Get It!!

    I'm reading this thread and it totally makes sense and I can totally relate. Last time I really thought about suicide was one week before my brother died. I was totally thinking I could do it. I didn't see any other way out and my life was a mess. My job was going ok but I...
    deleted deleted
    2 Responses Jan 26, 2012


    Alone with myself, I was startled to see other footprints in the dust Incredible how it builds on our memories after so many years Suffer the loss of perception, the loss of perspective Take orders from phantoms loyal to unknown powers I chewed silently on my lip, afraid to speak...
    deleted deleted
    Oct 10, 2011

    The Humming Of Rail Lines

    I was very depressed for a while but couldn't think of a way out. I remember sitting on a deserted railway station listening to the rails hum and wondered if stepping in front of a train might be the answer. It wasn't. I wouldn't want my death to affect the driver or risk serious...
    AtomicWater AtomicWater
    41-45, F
    2 Responses Sep 28, 2010

    I've Contemplated Suicide But I Don't Know Why

    Now, I've contemplated with reason to do so (at least for me it made sense at the time) but sometimes, I think about it with no real rhyme or reason.. it just happens....
    drjoshfox drjoshfox
    26-30, M
    Aug 7, 2013

    The Shotgun Test

      I can't say I've ever been suicidal, but I have though of it in the past. When my marriage really turned bad, I was really in pain for some time. After a year or so, I could see no way out. I was so stressed I got shingles (at the age of 38 - supposedly pretty unusual...
    Jamminman Jamminman
    2 Responses Aug 19, 2008

    Unanswered Cry

    I’m alone and in the dark. There’s no movement… there’s no noise… but in the distance I heard a cry. I walked towards the cry and in the corner of the room I found a girl sitting in her own tears. As I went towards the girl, I asked her what was...
    Vix3n Vix3n
    26-30, F
    Apr 28, 2010

    I Always Laugh...

    I always laugh to myself when I'm watching a commercial on TV for some medication and it mentions a side effect as "may cause thoughts of suicide"... Really? On a daily basis I FANTASIZE about suicide. I could give you 5 ways to kill yourself and make it look like a random...
    Xanadu7 Xanadu7
    41-45, M
    2 Responses Nov 11, 2010

    I have had a relatively long track record of

    attempted suicide. Whilst we apparently live in the world of opportunity, life had never quite gone right. I do not seek sympathy for this, though, like many others do. I have made a pact with myself. If things don't show the slightest sign of getting better by the time I am 30...
    Ophello Ophello
    22-25, M
    1 Response Jan 8, 2014

    All The Time

    Stupid little things set me off. There's not 15 minutes that go by where I don't have a suicidal thought. I always come up with several scenarios based on my environment. Quick, slow, messy, subtle, elaborate, and everything in between. Most of the time I don't go through with it...
    L96Arctic L96Arctic
    22-25, M
    Jan 22, 2012

    I just read something about this

    and I come from it at a point like this. I have always known how I would kill myself, since I was 12 that method of killing myself has not changed (taking the sharpest knife and stabbing it into my bellybutton as slow as I could), I know how to make my self suffer, that way has...
    mlcockrell mlcockrell
    41-45, M
    Jan 9, 2014

    I have done it many times in the past,

    and I have done so tonight. But I have yet to attempt it. Does it make me a coward? I'd like to think it's a good thing I didn't but sometimes I don't know.
    stjimmy765 stjimmy765
    18-21, M
    Feb 27

    For The Record....

    There is a VAST difference between CONTEMPLATING suicide and PLANNING suicide.... I've contemplated suicide for the majority of my life, but only a handful of these times were actually plans, and even fewer led to attempts. For those that aren't sure of the difference...
    ladyzantorian ladyzantorian
    18-21, F
    1 Response Feb 22, 2012
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