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I Have Dissociative Identity Disorder

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 632 People

    Does anyone else have this headache type

    feeling sometimes when your trying to sleep? Or an Alter that's a kid and pretty afraid of everything when he/she have a nightmare? Cause man, I feel like I have a headache and Theta had a nightmare when he in control for a bit and took a nap.
    MultipleRex MultipleRex 16-17, M 2 Responses Aug 8

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    My Inners/Alters Whatever...

    I am currently up to 6. My therapist says I am not DID, this p1ssed the kids off, so they made me forget appointments for a month. ...They basically thought she was saying they aren't real... ...I LIKE my "kids", whatever they are. They helped me survive.  They STILL help me...
    hylierandom hylierandom 41-45 5 Responses Jan 26, 2013

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    My Headmates

    I have DID. I have had this ever since I was eleven, and I don't know how to really explain them all, so I'll make a list (much like my alter egos. The sad thing about my alter egos is that they receded into their world [Yes, I have a world in my head. It's much like Wonderland...
    ManicAttack ManicAttack 18-21, F 8 Responses Mar 31, 2013

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    These last few days I have been having to fight

    to keep an alter from coming out. L has taken up this new hobby of pretending to be me, and then hanging out with my ex. Last week I took over and she was sitting next to me and three days had gone by. To not have the memories from L being out is odd, I usually know what's going...
    owletsoutlet owletsoutlet 22-25, M 1 Response Jul 30

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    ((also posted in I have multiple personality

    disorder)) I was talking to my friend about systems being formed, the "rules" when it comes to MPD/DID and she said "yes every system FUNCTIONS differently but there are rules as to how its formed" And with a few things said/mentioned before I think she was accusing me of...
    FullHotel FullHotel 13-15, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    Not Doing Well...8/6/13

    The part of me/us that thinks "She just needs to not exist," is active again. It's scary. This part wants me dead, because I'm the problem. I'm also fighting not to self-injure. This is all a very familiarly unpleasant place, but I thought we were doing better, here.
    hylierandom hylierandom 41-45 13 Responses Aug 6, 2013

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    My name is Tegan, and

    although stated I do not actually have DID though I am looking to speak to those who did (and wasnt sure how else to get it to show on the DID feed) I am currently writing a report on Dissociative Identity Disorder for a school assessment, Though like most things in life, I...
    TeganMaree TeganMaree 18-21, F Jun 24

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    Sucker Punch

    I watched this movie last night...if you have DID...you will understand it better than any person on the face of the earth. BUT IT WILL TRIGGER!! I highly recommend it, especially for those who would like to see what it is like inside the mind of some of us with DID. If you...
    BrokenOneX BrokenOneX 31-35 8 Responses Aug 14, 2011

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    They Aren't The Problem, I Am

    I always envied how when something bad happens my fiancé asks to speak to my alters. It was never me. I could work things out if given the time. I just want to be given the chance to help. :( Sometimes I feel that no one wants me, like if I disappeared it'd be fine. They wouldn...
    Lexy5 Lexy5 18-21, F 6 Responses Oct 19, 2012

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    Did-nos-wtf

    Apparently I have Dissociative Identity Disorder, Not Otherwise Specified....The kids in my head are all like "We TOLD you so!" Well, they were right. ...I was reminded we may not have found everyone yet... That's a little ominous. Maybe that's where the intrusive thoughts come...
    hylierandom hylierandom 41-45 2 Responses Jun 24, 2013

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    Starting To Accept It.

    When did it start? Well I don't know. I was physically abused from the ages 4-10. It started off slow. A slap here, a shove there. And as I got older it turned into emotional abuse. And I started getting punched and locked in closets and thrown down stairs. A lot of it is hard...
    HippieBitch HippieBitch 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 11, 2013

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    The sadistic feelings don't last long,

    but god when they hit, they hit hard. Sitting here smoking, waiting to leave to get the boys. All I want is to be alone in a bar, drunk off my ***, and picking fights I know I won't win. I guess in a way it's the only way I can feel normal. I'm not used to these long periods of...
    BrokenOneX BrokenOneX 31-35 Jul 14

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    I need some help guys!

    I have recently had about 9 alters come out and they have taken over. They are very nice but my husband and I do not know how to cope with this. The therapist I see for PTSD and conversion disorder said she has only had one experience while one of her other clients was...
    gaga1982 gaga1982 31-35, F 2 Responses Jun 25

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    Afraid Of Losing Someone...

    This has always been a fear of mine and my alters. I lost my parents at a young age. My father died in a fire and my mother died of a brain hemmorage. My grandpa passed away at a young age and my grandma just died recently. I am always afraid of someone I love dying, especially...
    Leena26 Leena26 46-50, F 2 Responses Jan 21, 2012

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    well once again things have gone a bit overly

    complicated for me. I went to the hospital on the 24th of December got stitches in my arm the cut was really deep again. didn't get out till the 25th I walked home in the dark alone and then got back to the house. I'm in a new house again by the way. I don't know why I can't...
    tallestshadow tallestshadow 22-25, T 2 Responses Jan 12

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    It's battle everyday.

    Sometimes you just have to ask "why me? What have I done to deserve this?" Some days are so much harder then others.
    LittleBeelzebub LittleBeelzebub 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 17

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    My old therapist moved out of state.

    She really understood me and my alters and had spoken to most of them at least once. My new therapist? hes a skeptic. Joy. He insists that I'm delusional and a malingerer (someone who makes things up to get medical attention) now i really have nobody to talk to about it on a...
    dianadra dianadra 22-25, F 3 Responses Jan 25

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    Well, a week from now my summer vacation ends

    and I'm going back to school. It's going to be hard this year, plus the fact my few friends might want to avoid me because I'm starting to lose control of all my alters, Sigma mostly. I'm just afraid everyone is going to reject me and brand me "Freak of The High School". Anyone...
    MultipleRex MultipleRex 16-17, M Aug 11

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    Two Peas In A Pod

    For a long time in my life, I knew I shared my mind with someone else. It wasn't until my late teens that I was determined to actually be co-conscious. My experience with this 'disorder' has been so incredibly positive, I've gained a friend and a new outlook on life. In my mind...
    TheDreamQueen TheDreamQueen 22-25, F 3 Responses Feb 24, 2013

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    I've had DID all my life,

    but disscovvered this last year through therapy. I have at least 8 alters but only know 6 of their names. I fully understand now why my life has Never normal. I am very glad to finally know and accept them. I do however need much support. Because I could not continue therapy...
    JanaMG JanaMG 61-65, F 4 Responses Jan 30

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    So I've been having issues with one of my

    alters lately. I'm not at all in touch with her really, or I guess co-conscious is the right word to use, I wouldn't know about her if other people didn't tell me. Another of my alters told me her name is Isla so that's all I know about her. The issue is she comes out when I'm...
    shell17 shell17 18-21, F 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    My name is Amanda and I am confused.

    My therapist said that I have PTSD,Conversion Disorder, and DID all coming from suppressed sexual abuse as a child. My life was normal two months ago I just got a promotion at work and family life was great. Then I have started remembering / flashbacks of the abuse. what I am...
    gaga1982 gaga1982 31-35, F 3 Responses Jun 22

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    Dating Someone With Dissociative Identity Disorder

      I am currently seeing someone with DID.The man I am seeing is wonderful!Lets call him Gavin.Gavin is happy-go-lucky, easy to talk to, understanding, optimistic, and so many more things…We have an amazing bond, unlike any I have ever shared with another human being...
    Neenie907 Neenie907 22-25, F 10 Responses Nov 4, 2009

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    The Mirror

    Every day I encountered the girl in the mirror with skepticism, but her smile was so inviting and her conversation so stimulating. She spoke as if she knew my intimate thoughts and desires but her face was not of mine. It was slightly different in an alluring kind of way. She had...
    KayTJewels KayTJewels 26-30 1 Response Jul 4, 2011

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    Hm, May As Well Make A Post.

    Well, I figured I'd post something to get to know other people who live under similar-ish circumstances, and possibly make friends with them (well, I suppose that's a no brainer). I guess I'll tell you guys about, uh, my body's life? (I think that's the most appropriate way of...
    deleted deleted 26-30 6 Responses Mar 9, 2013

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    im struggling with trying to keep my boyfriend

    and my other personality happy at the same time. no matter what i do its wrong.
    LittleBeelzebub LittleBeelzebub 18-21, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    hello the host here and im gonna share my

    experience since i feel that its time. so in 2011 i was diagnosed with DID and PTSD. idk i really dont know how to handle it? it still feels super unreal to me. my therapist has helped me discover an alter but idk if thats helping me?? id just like to befriend some people like...
    komaeda komaeda 16-17, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    We're Doing WHAT????

    Katherine, who appears to be my internal self helper? She wants us to integrate. She doesn't care how much chaos this causes, because she wants us to "shine."I asked her how long this will take, she said two years...... 8[ ...That's fast. Really fast.Basically...to de...
    hylierandom hylierandom 41-45 9 Responses Oct 17, 2013

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    I've never met anyone else with this disorder.

    . Just wish I knew more people or even just one person who understand what I'm going through.
    LittleBeelzebub LittleBeelzebub 18-21, F 3 Responses Jul 17

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    Bad Day

    we are really struggling not to hurt ourself right now.we want to soooo badly. we won't.  we can't.  it's notallowed.  the protectors have a rule.  noone can harmthemselves, each other, or the body.  when the protectorsset a rule we all have to follow it whether we want to...
    TruthSpeaks71 TruthSpeaks71 41-45 3 Responses Aug 19, 2012

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    I guess something's are just hard wired,

    seriously it's my final days of my summer vacation. All I ask for is relaxation, nothing more. But no, my mother who promised to help me get through my problems, who promised to stop being the ***** she once was to me, one of the many people that hurt me and caused me to be this...
    MultipleRex MultipleRex 16-17, M 1 Response Aug 13

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    Anybody As Full As I Am? Lol

    Hello i am living with 19 alters...some good...some bad...and i really would like to talk to somebody else who has them...its really awkward for me to talk about this but i figure if im going to this is the best place to do so
    MissRabbit MissRabbit 22-25, F 12 Responses Mar 8, 2012

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    From what I can tell this disorder,

    disease, adventure, experience (whatever you want to call it) is highly personalized. Everyone who is diagnosed has a very different experience. I think that really contributes to the confusion that most of the people with DID already live with. I'm just coming to realize that...
    annabanana1907 annabanana1907 18-21, F Feb 8

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    DID

    For years speaking about my disorder has been taboo but know its time to make a stand. I have DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) i have a system of 7 functioning personalities with their own thought process likes dislikes etc. Together we map out on how to get through one day...
    Pablo89 Pablo89 22-25, F 6 Responses Nov 30, 2013

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    Healthy Multiplicity

    I have a case of what I like to call extremely mild DID. Others call it "Healthy Multiplicity". Basically, it's a form of DID that isn't considered to be a disorder, but just a condition. It doesn't cause any problems for me, and I am actually really glad I have it. I just wish I...
    saltyshelley saltyshelley 18-21, F 6 Responses Feb 3, 2012

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    After reading someones story about a rape the

    other night it got me thinking a little about my past. I laid in bed thinking about it and started to drift off to sleep. Suddenly my husband coughed right in my ear as he slept and it startled me so bad I went into a panic attack. I laid in bed blindly staring at the ceiling...
    BrokenOneX BrokenOneX 31-35 Jul 26

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    I'm starting to think several of my alters have

    integrated, but I have no idea how to know. It's like I know it is them based on how it felt when I was co-conscious with them, but now when I feel them I can't put a name to them. And if my husband asks who's out it feels weird to even attempt to put a name with the way I'm...
    BrokenOneX BrokenOneX 31-35 1 Response Jul 21

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    I know that I have a few months to go

    until I'm the age of the majority, but I can't take this. I plan to fake my death and run away. Hailie helped me with the list of things that I need to get if I want to be successful with it. 👌
    Samaccino Samaccino 16-17, F 2 Responses Jul 19

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    About Me: Medi

    This is the first in a series of writings everybody in this body will participate in (assuming they go on EP at all). Its intent is to allow the reader to get to know each person in this body better, with information about the writer coming directly from the writer, thus avoiding...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses May 26, 2013

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    New... I Am A Hotel-Head who just spent 2 hours retype what we accidentially deleted the first time!! LOL

    Hello to the Group! I'm "M", and I am a "Hotel-Head". This is a term the kids came up with to describe the number of people in here and the chaos that follows them. Some of ours "check out" (deal with the "real" world), while some seem to have "do not disturb" signs wielded to...
    MoriBlue MoriBlue 46-50 3 Responses May 30, 2013

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    Sometimes I Feel Possessed

    There are many times the people in my head are talking to me and in the middle of their sentence their words would continue out my mouth without me knowing what they were going to say. I know this sounds completely weird. I have lost all my outside friends because of this problem...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jun 11, 2013

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    We're afraid of integra*ion.

    My T says it's the only way to heal. But we feel safe the way we are.
    CollectionOfSouls CollectionOfSouls 22-25, M 3 Responses Aug 7

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    Does anyone else live in,

    or has ever lived in an environment that doesn't support their illness? I'm trying my best to keep everything under control around my family but it's not working. I just keep getting more depressed and less functional. I don't know how to communicate with them in an effective...
    annabanana1907 annabanana1907 18-21, F 2 Responses Feb 13

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    Went camping and OE made a money house out of

    trees. He took old dead trees and wedged them in between
    owletsoutlet owletsoutlet 22-25, M 1 Response Jul 8

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    So my psychiatrist told me I should keep a

    journal for me and my alters, during the school year. It's basically for me, or my alters whenever they are in control, to write in. Such as what we feel, how are things, etc. So I replied to her saying, "so like a diary?", and she replied yes but for boys. I'm not sure whether...
    MultipleRex MultipleRex 16-17, M 4 Responses 6 days ago

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    I have a whole playlist of songs

    that make me feel understood, these are the ones that focus on my DID... "Animal I have Become" Three Days Grace "Monster" Skillet "I am an Illusion" Rob Thomas "All These Years" Adema "Let Me Be Myself" 3 Doors Down "One X" Three Days Grace "Chameleon Boy" Blue October "Ugly...
    BrokenOneX BrokenOneX 31-35 Aug 1

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    So today was the first day of school,

    junior year of high school, and it was alright. I started Delta and I started a bit on the journal and you guys were right about it. Hopefully my other alters would start writing in it soon, I know would like too. Switching was at a minimum today at school, but I know for a fact...
    MultipleRex MultipleRex 16-17, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    Jaqueline's Story

     My name is Jaqueline. I am around 16 years old and havebeen for a very long time.  I am one of the vast manyin the system that goes here by Truth_Speaks.Recently, in emails, a very good friend of ours here onEP has been talking about feeling like things were herfault...
    TruthSpeaks71 TruthSpeaks71 41-45 6 Responses Aug 30, 2012

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    LittleBeelzebub LittleBeelzebub 18-21, F 4 Responses Jul 29

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    Don't Even Know Who I Am

    That is right, I don't even know who I am. Am I the host of this body or not? What is going on inside makes no sense to me. Our supposed host doesn't even know who she is so how are we supposed to know who we are or why? Nothing makes much sense no more. Confused and alone
    Rachel4now Rachel4now 31-35, F 20 Responses Feb 16, 2008

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    I'm new to this site,

    apparently one of my alters posted on here earlier and posted under the wrong category :s I was just wondering what it feels like for other people when they switch between alters and how much or how little control other people have..? Thanks!
    shell17 shell17 18-21, F 6 Responses Aug 13

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    How do you figure out their names?

    How do you know how many you have? How do you know when you are transitioning into an alter????? HELP
    KAYCIXO KAYCIXO 18-21, F 5 Responses Jul 12

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    Ugh I might as well do it,

    My name is Sigma, "Rex" might have already talked about me. Alpha, aka Rex, has been gone for a few hours now. It's so easy to imitate Alpha, not even his own parents know I'm not him. I should've done this years ago. All the things I could've done, and besides, with friends...
    MultipleRex MultipleRex 16-17, M 2 Responses Jul 29

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