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I Have Dissociative Identity Disorder

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 614 People

    Hm, May As Well Make A Post.

    Well, I figured I'd post something to get to know other people who live under similar-ish circumstances, and possibly make friends with them (well, I suppose that's a no brainer). I guess I'll tell you guys about, uh, my body's life? (I think that's the most appropriate way of...
    deleted deleted 26-30 6 Responses Mar 9, 2013

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    It's battle everyday.

    Sometimes you just have to ask "why me? What have I done to deserve this?" Some days are so much harder then others.
    LittleBeelzebub LittleBeelzebub 18-21, F 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    We want to talk to other DID systems :)

    if you have DID or DDNOS-1 and want to talk, message usss ❤️
    Yourguardianangel9613 Yourguardianangel9613 16-17, F 1 hr ago

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    Starting To Accept It.

    When did it start? Well I don't know. I was physically abused from the ages 4-10. It started off slow. A slap here, a shove there. And as I got older it turned into emotional abuse. And I started getting punched and locked in closets and thrown down stairs. A lot of it is hard...
    HippieBitch HippieBitch 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 11, 2013

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    After a month, I have a completely different

    outlook on how my relationship with my ex was. Seeing this with a clear head and talking it out with the others, has helped me realize we do better with out her. She is a very sweet girl and love her, but she has a very pessimistic out look on everything. Which is just to much...
    owletsoutlet owletsoutlet 22-25, M 1 Response Jun 23

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    About Me: Medi

    This is the first in a series of writings everybody in this body will participate in (assuming they go on EP at all). Its intent is to allow the reader to get to know each person in this body better, with information about the writer coming directly from the writer, thus avoiding...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response May 26, 2013

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    My old therapist moved out of state.

    She really understood me and my alters and had spoken to most of them at least once. My new therapist? hes a skeptic. Joy. He insists that I'm delusional and a malingerer (someone who makes things up to get medical attention) now i really have nobody to talk to about it on a...
    dianadra dianadra 22-25, F 3 Responses Jan 25

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    They Aren't The Problem, I Am

    I always envied how when something bad happens my fiancé asks to speak to my alters. It was never me. I could work things out if given the time. I just want to be given the chance to help. :( Sometimes I feel that no one wants me, like if I disappeared it'd be fine. They wouldn...
    Lexy5 Lexy5 18-21, F 6 Responses Oct 19, 2012

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    I've had DID all my life,

    but disscovvered this last year through therapy. I have at least 8 alters but only know 6 of their names. I fully understand now why my life has Never normal. I am very glad to finally know and accept them. I do however need much support. Because I could not continue therapy...
    JanaMG JanaMG 61-65, F 4 Responses Jan 30

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    sadly i ended up cutting my arm really bad.

    i was left alone in the house and just broke down. i dont know what to do. i am trying so hard but things are just getting harder. i have been looking for a job because i got permission from my lawyer. but no place will take me on because of my problems. i try to keep my bad...
    tallestshadow tallestshadow 22-25, T 3 Responses Apr 29

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    I am pissed off! I joined a DID group page on

    facebook and they started tripping and deleted me. i have been feeling alone. And now I cant even join a DID page. The person who booted me off that page also sent messages to other administrators telling them that they could not add me on the page and so on.. I was counting on...
    LiLSparKle LiLSparKle 26-30, F 2 Responses Apr 28

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    Sucker Punch

    I watched this movie last night...if you have DID...you will understand it better than any person on the face of the earth. BUT IT WILL TRIGGER!! I highly recommend it, especially for those who would like to see what it is like inside the mind of some of us with DID. If you...
    BrokenOneX BrokenOneX 26-30 8 Responses Aug 14, 2011

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    Has anyone ever been to a trauma unit/hospital

    for people with DID and had a GOOD experience? I really need to go to a hospital.
    Owlmaid Owlmaid 26-30, F May 22

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    Hmm well hello, my name is Melissa

    and I have Dissociative Identity Disorder, uhm and I'm not the main Alter of this body, and well because of that I dont have much time of my own, since I'm not a very important persona... But well I'm bored and mad at my brother, whose name is Jake (he's another alter), we're...
    fairyMelissa fairyMelissa 13-15, F 2 Responses Apr 15

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    Went camping and OE made a money house out of

    trees. He took old dead trees and wedged them in between
    owletsoutlet owletsoutlet 22-25, M 1 Response Jul 8

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    I need some help guys!

    I have recently had about 9 alters come out and they have taken over. They are very nice but my husband and I do not know how to cope with this. The therapist I see for PTSD and conversion disorder said she has only had one experience while one of her other clients was...
    gaga1982 gaga1982 31-35, F 2 Responses Jun 25

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    I have DID--the coconscious part of the

    spectrum. I am frustrated with myself bc I do not know what trauma caused the DID. None of the parts will come out and inform me or my therapist. This week, a part or parts informed me that a particular event happened to me; no other information was provided. No feelings or...
    Motleybunch Motleybunch 36-40, F 3 Responses May 9

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    Jaqueline's Story

     My name is Jaqueline. I am around 16 years old and havebeen for a very long time.  I am one of the vast manyin the system that goes here by Truth_Speaks.Recently, in emails, a very good friend of ours here onEP has been talking about feeling like things were herfault...
    TruthSpeaks71 TruthSpeaks71 41-45 6 Responses Aug 30, 2012

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    I know that I have a few months to go

    until I'm the age of the majority, but I can't take this. I plan to fake my death and run away. Hailie helped me with the list of things that I need to get if I want to be successful with it. 👌
    Samaccino Samaccino 16-17, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    Sometimes I Feel Possessed

    There are many times the people in my head are talking to me and in the middle of their sentence their words would continue out my mouth without me knowing what they were going to say. I know this sounds completely weird. I have lost all my outside friends because of this problem...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jun 11, 2013

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    Did-nos-wtf

    Apparently I have Dissociative Identity Disorder, Not Otherwise Specified....The kids in my head are all like "We TOLD you so!" Well, they were right. ...I was reminded we may not have found everyone yet... That's a little ominous. Maybe that's where the intrusive thoughts come...
    hylierandom hylierandom 41-45 2 Responses Jun 24, 2013

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    Two Peas In A Pod

    For a long time in my life, I knew I shared my mind with someone else. It wasn't until my late teens that I was determined to actually be co-conscious. My experience with this 'disorder' has been so incredibly positive, I've gained a friend and a new outlook on life. In my mind...
    TheDreamQueen TheDreamQueen 22-25, F 3 Responses Feb 24, 2013

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    I woke up one day to a tattoo of the number

    four on the right side of my chest right after turning 18. I was later told by OE (an alter) that it was to seal in the number of alters and get rid of the ones who are to fragmented. The only thing is I'm not so sure it worked. Sometimes I feel like there are more who are...
    owletsoutlet owletsoutlet 22-25, M 3 Responses May 18

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    Trying to figure out

    why family is usually the least accepting of this disorder. But best friends almost already know and accept it without missing a beat. I, well Jesse in an extremely drunk state, told my husband about his existence. My husband originally thought he could just tell Jesse to go...
    BrokenOneX BrokenOneX 26-30 5 days ago

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    The others were really quiet

    until today. I found out a friend/coworker is pregnant, and she is telling me first because she has no one else to turn to. L has a close relationship with her at work, so when i heard he was immediately vocal. And loud. He is so worried about her as her situation is not very...
    owletsoutlet owletsoutlet 22-25, M Jun 6

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    well im getting evicted soon.

    and i had yet another wonderful break down. i did a deep cut in my leg and this time. i guess Moon wanted to play Doctor because she stiched us up herself. shes pissed. im freaking out i dont know if i should scream or cry. i cant sleep and thanks to a bad tooth that i cant get...
    tallestshadow tallestshadow 22-25, T 2 Responses Apr 22

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    I'm starting to think several of my alters have

    integrated, but I have no idea how to know. It's like I know it is them based on how it felt when I was co-conscious with them, but now when I feel them I can't put a name to them. And if my husband asks who's out it feels weird to even attempt to put a name with the way I'm...
    BrokenOneX BrokenOneX 26-30 1 Response 2 days ago

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    Anybody As Full As I Am? Lol

    Hello i am living with 19 alters...some good...some bad...and i really would like to talk to somebody else who has them...its really awkward for me to talk about this but i figure if im going to this is the best place to do so
    MissRabbit MissRabbit 22-25, F 12 Responses Mar 8, 2012

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    The sadistic feelings don't last long,

    but god when they hit, they hit hard. Sitting here smoking, waiting to leave to get the boys. All I want is to be alone in a bar, drunk off my ***, and picking fights I know I won't win. I guess in a way it's the only way I can feel normal. I'm not used to these long periods of...
    BrokenOneX BrokenOneX 26-30 Jul 14

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    Does anyone else live in,

    or has ever lived in an environment that doesn't support their illness? I'm trying my best to keep everything under control around my family but it's not working. I just keep getting more depressed and less functional. I don't know how to communicate with them in an effective...
    annabanana1907 annabanana1907 18-21, F 2 Responses Feb 13

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    How do you figure out their names?

    How do you know how many you have? How do you know when you are transitioning into an alter????? HELP
    KAYCIXO KAYCIXO 18-21, F 4 Responses Jul 12

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    The difference in hand writing between me

    (Jessica) and my alters (Sarah and Jessie) I think we all have bad writing but Sarah likes her hand writing and Jessie just doesn't care Sarah's about 23 and Jessie's 6
    2Thoughts 2Thoughts 18-21, F 1 Response May 31

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    From what I can tell this disorder,

    disease, adventure, experience (whatever you want to call it) is highly personalized. Everyone who is diagnosed has a very different experience. I think that really contributes to the confusion that most of the people with DID already live with. I'm just coming to realize that...
    annabanana1907 annabanana1907 18-21, F Feb 8

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    I'm dating someone who has DID.

    We've been together for two months, but I've known him for four years, and reconnected with him in June 2013. I knew he had DID, so its not a new thing. He has one other personalty, we'll call him G and we'll call my boyfriend Z. I've never seen G, and Z claims that he's in...
    acitytoburn acitytoburn 18-21 2 Responses Jun 2

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    well once again things have gone a bit overly

    complicated for me. I went to the hospital on the 24th of December got stitches in my arm the cut was really deep again. didn't get out till the 25th I walked home in the dark alone and then got back to the house. I'm in a new house again by the way. I don't know why I can't...
    tallestshadow tallestshadow 22-25, T 2 Responses Jan 12

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    My name is Amanda and I am confused.

    My therapist said that I have PTSD,Conversion Disorder, and DID all coming from suppressed sexual abuse as a child. My life was normal two months ago I just got a promotion at work and family life was great. Then I have started remembering / flashbacks of the abuse. what I am...
    gaga1982 gaga1982 31-35, F 1 Response Jun 22

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    someone explain what this is

    and the symptoms...
    bubbles543 bubbles543 16-17, F 3 Responses Jun 2

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    Don't Even Know Who I Am

    That is right, I don't even know who I am. Am I the host of this body or not? What is going on inside makes no sense to me. Our supposed host doesn't even know who she is so how are we supposed to know who we are or why? Nothing makes much sense no more. Confused and alone
    Rachel4now Rachel4now 31-35, F 20 Responses Feb 16, 2008

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    My name is Tegan, and

    although stated I do not actually have DID though I am looking to speak to those who did (and wasnt sure how else to get it to show on the DID feed) I am currently writing a report on Dissociative Identity Disorder for a school assessment, Though like most things in life, I...
    TeganMaree TeganMaree 18-21, F Jun 24

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    DID

    For years speaking about my disorder has been taboo but know its time to make a stand. I have DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) i have a system of 7 functioning personalities with their own thought process likes dislikes etc. Together we map out on how to get through one day...
    Pablo89 Pablo89 22-25, F 6 Responses Nov 30, 2013

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    Bad Day

    we are really struggling not to hurt ourself right now.we want to soooo badly. we won't.  we can't.  it's notallowed.  the protectors have a rule.  noone can harmthemselves, each other, or the body.  when the protectorsset a rule we all have to follow it whether we want to...
    TruthSpeaks71 TruthSpeaks71 41-45 3 Responses Aug 19, 2012

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    We're Doing WHAT????

    Katherine, who appears to be my internal self helper? She wants us to integrate. She doesn't care how much chaos this causes, because she wants us to "shine."I asked her how long this will take, she said two years...... 8[ ...That's fast. Really fast.Basically...to de...
    hylierandom hylierandom 41-45 9 Responses Oct 17, 2013

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    Why Nathan Came To Existence?

    I'm not sure when Nathan first appeared. I'v never been able to keep track of time. memories of things happening first happened after. Memories happening afterwards may have happened before. I remember Nathan hanging around in childhood. He was everything I was not supposed to be...
    crashtestdummy80 crashtestdummy80 31-35, M 3 Responses Aug 19, 2011

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    Not Doing Well...8/6/13

    The part of me/us that thinks "She just needs to not exist," is active again. It's scary. This part wants me dead, because I'm the problem. I'm also fighting not to self-injure. This is all a very familiarly unpleasant place, but I thought we were doing better, here.
    hylierandom hylierandom 41-45 12 Responses Aug 6, 2013

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    My Headmates

    I have DID. I have had this ever since I was eleven, and I don't know how to really explain them all, so I'll make a list (much like my alter egos. The sad thing about my alter egos is that they receded into their world [Yes, I have a world in my head. It's much like Wonderland...
    ManicAttack ManicAttack 18-21, F 8 Responses Mar 31, 2013

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    New... I Am A Hotel-Head who just spent 2 hours retype what we accidentially deleted the first time!! LOL

    Hello to the Group! I'm "M", and I am a "Hotel-Head". This is a term the kids came up with to describe the number of people in here and the chaos that follows them. Some of ours "check out" (deal with the "real" world), while some seem to have "do not disturb" signs wielded to...
    MoriBlue MoriBlue 46-50 3 Responses May 30, 2013

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    An introduction. My name

    for privacy purposes is J, I am and art student and the host of this fine party. My element is earth. I was abused by multiple people before I was even in school, and all the way through high school. My first alter appeared in 6th grade. I got beat up a lot and one day he...
    owletsoutlet owletsoutlet 22-25, M 2 Responses May 22

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    Dating Someone With Dissociative Identity Disorder

      I am currently seeing someone with DID.The man I am seeing is wonderful!Lets call him Gavin.Gavin is happy-go-lucky, easy to talk to, understanding, optimistic, and so many more things…We have an amazing bond, unlike any I have ever shared with another human being...
    Neenie907 Neenie907 22-25, F 10 Responses Nov 4, 2009

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    I had been arguing with an alter about telling

    the woman I love about having DID, when we first started dating I hadn't switched in a while and it continued that way until February. R took over, he made me break up with her. I had no control over what was coming out of my mouth, it didn't even sound like me. It was a test to...
    owletsoutlet owletsoutlet 22-25, M 5 Responses May 25

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    I have DID no matter how hard I try not to

    admit it or reveal my diagnosis I can't get away from it. I wish I did not have DID I want to have a simple normal life without feeding any mental health issue. I want to be successful in life and become some one big but it seems I can only get soo far before symptoms arise...
    nomoreoopsy nomoreoopsy 31-35, F 3 Responses Apr 5

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    The Mirror

    Every day I encountered the girl in the mirror with skepticism, but her smile was so inviting and her conversation so stimulating. She spoke as if she knew my intimate thoughts and desires but her face was not of mine. It was slightly different in an alluring kind of way. She had...
    KayTJewels KayTJewels 26-30 1 Response Jul 4, 2011

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    Hello my name is Alexus.

    I was diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder back in around the year of 2012. I am 19 years old now. And I have many questions. 1. My old therapist said I could perhaps get better someday is that true? 2. How do I know when I am better? 3. What is considered as...
    uglyduckling69 uglyduckling69 18-21 1 Response May 22

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    If anyone ever messages me

    and I sound kinda weird and not normal in general it's probably one of my alters. A lot of times if someone who's not in my age range messages me, my one alter Damon will basically interrogate them before I can talk .-.
    Yourguardianangel9613 Yourguardianangel9613 16-17, F 1 Response 2 days ago