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I Have Got to Be More Assertive

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 121 People

    Watching That You Don't Get Agressive

    As I've been reading up on assertiveness they say an assertive person would be in control and calm  and use anger in a controlled way.  So I've  been watching how when I get frustrated with my son or wife I try to present my case in a more kind way.  Try to...
    tregg tregg 61-65, M Sep 25, 2010

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    Doormat No More!

    I tend to not say what I'm feeling like I could be thinking "you bastard how could you!" but it comes out "oh its okay" people are gonna get a piece of my mind from now on !
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response May 14, 2008

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    One of My Biggest Character Flaws

    I was always told and taught that no means no. Thus I WILL take no for answer. If someone says 'no' to something, I cease to persue the issue. Also I lean too much toward the I'll-just-take-what-the-world-gives-me attitude. I'm a bit pessimistic, so I figure, why assert...
    SonicReducer75 SonicReducer75 36-40, M 4 Responses Jan 11, 2009

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    The thing with me is I'm very mentally strong,

    I'm neither weak willed nor am I a pushover, but I so wish I appeared tougher on the outside! I don't want to be that person who always pushes everyone around, but just in a way where I don't seem so fearful or timid. My boss for example gives me a very nervous disposition at...
    AngelofPink AngelofPink 70+, F 1 Response Jul 15, 2014

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    itsmenhiceee itsmenhiceee 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 8, 2014

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    Not assertive at all I'm just too passive!

    I find it hard to say no and then I end up saying yes to please the other person and do something i don't want to do... I'm never sure of anything and I always say ok but get cold feet quite quickly and I never can say how I really feel! Which isn't great because then I'm not...
    MilweePetite MilweePetite 18-21, F Jul 13, 2014

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    Like I Was Born Overnight

    I used to be quite passive but now I take no ****! I'm not a ***** or anything I just know how to speak up now when something isn't right or is unjust. I am learning how to take control of things, do it on my own, and stand up for myself. Take baby steps if you want to, I...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jan 5, 2009

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    Last week I had to go to my local home

    improvement store. I usually go in the middle of the day to avoid any semblance of a crowd. Thus I had the place mostly to myself - except a few hardy contractors. I went to the sole clerk, who had no line. I avoid those automatic check outs because I invariably mess up and need...
    CatalinaVanilla CatalinaVanilla 26-30, F Nov 9, 2014

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    Why?

    Why do i need to be assertive? i have a deep low voice and i don't ever use it very strongly. Most the time i am cool going with the flow, but i never have anyone walk over me. Usually the most dangerous people are the ones who don't act dangerous. People can still see it in me...
    Arorin Arorin 22-25, M 7 Responses Feb 3, 2010

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    It Feels Weird When I Do Say "no" To People

    I'm so unassertive that when I say "no" to requests it feels surprisingly easy and empowering but also a little weird. It makes me realize that there are so many times when I could've said no, but I chose to say yes immediately because I figure it would make the other person...
    aislersan aislersan 31-35, M 1 Response Jan 14, 2011

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    I want to be..I hate freezing up,I hate getting anxious and not being able to get my point across cause of that,Ill just keep repeating myself and at some point wont even know what...
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    He wanted it and he got it.. Couldn't control himself and I couldn't stop him
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    I'm truly amazed and horrified at the judgemental overopinated and under informed ******* I used to be.
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