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I Have Got to Be More Assertive

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 122 People

    Not assertive at all I'm just too passive!

    I find it hard to say no and then I end up saying yes to please the other person and do something i don't want to do... I'm never sure of anything and I always say ok but get cold feet quite quickly and I never can say how I really feel! Which isn't great because then I'm not...
    MilweePetite MilweePetite 18-21, F Jul 13

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    itsmenhiceee itsmenhiceee 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 8

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    Why?

    Why do i need to be assertive? i have a deep low voice and i don't ever use it very strongly. Most the time i am cool going with the flow, but i never have anyone walk over me. Usually the most dangerous people are the ones who don't act dangerous. People can still see it in me...
    Arorin Arorin 22-25, M 7 Responses Feb 3, 2010

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    One of My Biggest Character Flaws

    I was always told and taught that no means no. Thus I WILL take no for answer. If someone says 'no' to something, I cease to persue the issue. Also I lean too much toward the I'll-just-take-what-the-world-gives-me attitude. I'm a bit pessimistic, so I figure, why assert...
    SonicReducer75 SonicReducer75 36-40, M 4 Responses Jan 11, 2009

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    The thing with me is I'm very mentally strong,

    I'm neither weak willed nor am I a pushover, but I so wish I appeared tougher on the outside! I don't want to be that person who always pushes everyone around, but just in a way where I don't seem so fearful or timid. My boss for example gives me a very nervous disposition at...
    AngelofPink AngelofPink 70+, F 1 Response Jul 15

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    Like I Was Born Overnight

    I used to be quite passive but now I take no ****! I'm not a ***** or anything I just know how to speak up now when something isn't right or is unjust. I am learning how to take control of things, do it on my own, and stand up for myself. Take baby steps if you want to, I...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jan 5, 2009

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    Doormat No More!

    I tend to not say what I'm feeling like I could be thinking "you bastard how could you!" but it comes out "oh its okay" people are gonna get a piece of my mind from now on !
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response May 14, 2008

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    Watching That You Don't Get Agressive

    As I've been reading up on assertiveness they say an assertive person would be in control and calm  and use anger in a controlled way.  So I've  been watching how when I get frustrated with my son or wife I try to present my case in a more kind way.  Try to...
    tregg tregg 61-65, M Sep 25, 2010

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    It Feels Weird When I Do Say "no" To People

    I'm so unassertive that when I say "no" to requests it feels surprisingly easy and empowering but also a little weird. It makes me realize that there are so many times when I could've said no, but I chose to say yes immediately because I figure it would make the other person...
    aislersan aislersan 31-35, M 1 Response Jan 14, 2011

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    Last week I had to go to my local home

    improvement store. I usually go in the middle of the day to avoid any semblance of a crowd. Thus I had the place mostly to myself - except a few hardy contractors. I went to the sole clerk, who had no line. I avoid those automatic check outs because I invariably mess up and need...
    CatalinaVanilla CatalinaVanilla 26-30, F Nov 9

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    Related Experiences

    I'm writing this for anyone who finds it hard to say No. Or if you allow other people to overstep the boundaries. That, in the words of One Direction, is The Story of My Life...
    talkinaftermidnight talkinaftermidnight 36-40, M 1 Response Nov 27

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    I need help to get more confidence and self respect. What do you guys recommend?
    SilentRider SilentRider 18-21, F Dec 7

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    I've got a small tattoo on my 21st birthday. The tattoo is the letter of my name and also his name. I've spent quite a long time thinking about it before going to the tattoo club...
    dquyen226 dquyen226 18-21, F 5 days ago

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    I guess having this experience is kind of a lie....I'm always finding new holes to poke my books into. God, they're everywhere though, books spread across my room like a fungus. My...
    Starrkya Starrkya 18-21, F Nov 22

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    Not as much as some. But recurring like them. Became glad for broken trailer. And disability pay. Didnt bring ok. But got me through bad symptoms. Stronger...
    OddlyScintilating OddlyScintilating 46-50, M Nov 24

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    But that's okay because I just got a Kindle! Heyoooo.
    bluegilledgirl bluegilledgirl 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 21

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    I got in trouble at school this morning. Me & my friend got sent to the Principals office for swearing in class. He said he's going to write home to our parents & we have to...
    smackedagain smackedagain 18-21, F 17 Responses Nov 24

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    Just Today Right Now, I Got Suspended For Protesting. My Second Suspension In My Whole Entire Life, Well Kinda Like My Third But I Don't Count The Second One Because My Mom Got Me...
    IWufflesDemi IWufflesDemi 13-15, F 2 Responses Nov 25

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    Usually it wasn't even my fault. Way back in kindergarten I went through three teachers, because the other two got knocked up and had babies. The third teacher hated my guts and...
    Skuggington Skuggington 13-15, M Nov 24

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    Yeah and got spanked by the teacher for it. One teacher spanked so hard that even just one spank on my clothed bottom would hurt for about 2 hours.
    BettyV2 BettyV2 41-45, F Nov 25

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    Weirdest thing, right. For my 9th birthday my friend got me a packet of cards that had pictures of naked babies lying on a bed of rose petals. Erm. WTF.
    DeathIsPartDinosaur DeathIsPartDinosaur 18-21, F 4 Responses Dec 6

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    I have, yes it isn't something I'm proud of. And I know I shouldn't have. I know I shouldn't. So why do I? I don't know.
    wedgieshurtalot wedgieshurtalot 16-17, F 2 Responses Nov 21

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    lol. i used to do this daily n i still do it but just not as much. the bar gets expensive and the people can get on my ******* nerves. buying beer n drinking all alone in my room...
    LightSparks LightSparks 26-30, M Nov 21

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    I am a success continues. I am a success because I want to live. I have started to have emotional feelings, of which sadness seems to dominate. I am remembering past events in...
    nicola2376 nicola2376 36-40, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    This is true . At this point I allow myself one bookcase for books. Just trying to keep it simple ....I used to have waaay too many books so I donated most of them. This is one...
    roseanne00 roseanne00 36-40, F 1 Response Nov 26

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    I have nearly 25,000 views.
    jml2000 jml2000 56-60, M 2 Responses Dec 6

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    My boyfriend left for Warped Tour without me so I sat alone in my room and drank.
    ajskyler ajskyler 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 20

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    I've done that before and it was a dark ******* day,I tell you what.
    KurMujun KurMujun 18-21, M Nov 21

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    Hi...im a student studyng for medicine ...gonna becum a doc one day ....i joined this medical school ....ther was this girl in my class who was literally close to my group of so...
    Lekshmisureshbabu Lekshmisureshbabu 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 21

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    I was suspended and expelled from Christian school so I guess that qualifies.
    RememberingSunday22 RememberingSunday22 36-40, F 2 Responses Nov 24

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    I punched a guy in the face for trying to insult my sister (he'd fallen against the lockers holding his mouth before he could finish what he was saying) I hurt his jaw and gave him...
    Tomm3y Tomm3y 18-21, M 1 Response Nov 24

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    This explains my life in a couple of words
    AtlPunk1D AtlPunk1D 13-15, F Nov 24

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    Once in third grade... I was being the awkward little poop I was and was playing with the worms in the dirt and tracked mud into the classroom. WOOP.
    RunawayBelle3 RunawayBelle3 13-15, F Nov 24

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    One time, I had an energy drink and the principal tried to take it from me and I ran into the bathroom and drank the whole thing and threw the empty can at him afterwards lol
    myhappylittlepill myhappylittlepill 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 28

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    Its faded but im gunna get it touched up eventually ! Its a home tattoo so it looks like **** but im in love with it !!! Its a vintage handled mirror with vanity written inside...
    amberlxl amberlxl 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 29

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    Mine was a bunny with a puke stain on it that played baby music. I was 12 lol
    Huskyforders Huskyforders 13-15, F 2 Responses Dec 6

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    It was my favorite but also the strangest. My grandmother was in a hospice for my 14th birthday and she threw me a surprise party in the hospice. It was strange but now that she...
    simplyOCD simplyOCD 16-17, F Dec 6

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    Of hearts and a butterfly with curly cues in blue yellow black and red
    Dotbar Dotbar 51-55, F 4 Responses 3 days ago

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    I am so excited for the end of February and the start of March so I can take my Clinical test for CNA licenses! I'm so ready to start my dream job :)
    hayhay2016 hayhay2016 16-17, F 22 hrs ago

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    They are everywhere. Every year that passes I bed up needing a new bookcase.
    LadyRubenesque LadyRubenesque 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 21

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    @17_danyell Heyy i have had a twitter for a while now, but only now i have gotten more into it and post on it alot more. Im looking ot branch out a little bit it would be cool to...
    danhorse danhorse 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 4

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    Again, excuse the awkward wordings to get around the censors, but it won't let me post this story without them. I was in one for six days in February, and then they forced me to...
    Boulier Boulier 18-21, F 5 Responses Dec 7

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    There are many things over a span of years that I have allowed to be said about me, and to me by members of this site. I have told you repeatedly that I do not speak out to...
    Joseph84 Joseph84 31-35, M 2 Responses Dec 8

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    I got an OWI 4 weeks ago on my sister's 21st birthday. I'm 23 in Wisconsin. I have court in less than a week. I don't even know where to begin but it was the biggest wake up call...
    devonshaye devonshaye 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 28

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    I am contemplating divorcing my husband. The problem is that this will be my third divorce and I am only 43. I made some bad decisions in my twenties based on growing up in an...
    strikes3 strikes3 41-45, F 1 day ago

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    At a certain age we all begin to wonder who we really are. I remember the first time I found myself alone, lost and completely forgotten. My best friends had decided I was no...
    Helenabby Helenabby 18-21, F Nov 24

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