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I Have Hilarious Drunk Stories

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 166 People

    I Swear I Think This Was Made-up

      When I first moved-in with my trailer-mate I was having problems adjusting, which of course meant that I was getting very little sleep. For about a week I was going to lay down but staying wide awake or even snatching what might have amounted...
    Dormantdrakon Dormantdrakon 22-25, F May 12, 2009

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    Oh What a Night!

    Before telling this story, I want everyone to know this is not a normal night for me.  I'm usually pretty tame. A few weeks ago, I went out with the girls for my cousin's 21st birthday to this little bar close to my place.  The night started off slow, but after a few...
    tasteofink tasteofink 26-30, F 4 Responses May 19, 2009

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    Saturday Night

    There were about 30 people there with a ton of beer and liquor. We got crazy drunk and nearly fought with two annoying ***** who kept flashing their boobs and flirting with everyone's boyfriends. One **** we promised a ride home and then drove off back to our house and she...
    DrinkstooMuch DrinkstooMuch 22-25 Oct 1, 2012

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    It's My Favourite Pastime!

    Apparently when I get drunk, making an arse of myself is like my fave hobby or something: I think I've done every drunken humuliating act except streaking that is known. But the one that most sticks out is the time I had a little more that I could handle, and my mate who I...
    IdleTraveller IdleTraveller 22-25, F 1 Response May 12, 2009

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    Drunk Lovers and Lighters Don't Mix

      One night a few years ago, I chose to take a walk up to an abandoned graveyard that we had so I could do a Thank You Memorial. It was a nice night while the dogs were itching to have a run so slipping my supplies into my pocket, I started off. At this point...
    Dormantdrakon Dormantdrakon 22-25, F 2 Responses May 12, 2009

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    Young,dumb,full Of Rum

    A silly story from my youth. Drunk and not wanting to stumble and shuffle the long walk home,we 'borrowed' a clapped out old pushbike from a mates front yard. I'd say bicycle but this was an ancient rusty 'pushie' with absolutely no brakes. (can you see where this is going...
    rustyfrog rustyfrog 36-40, F 2 Responses Jan 24, 2013

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    I Have to Tell This Story, Bad Avatar Or Not

    My husband and i wake up, way hung over, on a saturday morning.  Horribly hungover... we look around and try to figure out exactly what happened the night before.  As we are sharing our stories, we notice that there is a dark red substance all over our white sheets...
    FiFiDelmar FiFiDelmar 46-50, F 13 Responses Feb 1, 2008

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    The Boat

    I will go out and have some drinks from time to time, but it is very rare I drink to the point where it gets out of control. I do know a few people who don't have such great control of their drinking though. Debbie, a woman who lives in the same apartment complex as my friends...
    Grottisendsitback Grottisendsitback 18-21, M Nov 2, 2012

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    Halloween Night At the Local Bar

    One Halloween a buddy of mine dressed up as a woman and then we went to the bar. After a couple of drinks we pretended to have a lovers quarrel and my buddy slammed his ring on the table and went and sat with a guy at the next table across from us - who was by him self...
    Nanoose Nanoose 51-55, M 2 Responses Feb 11, 2008

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    Still Shuffling

    We live on the coast.  On new year's eve a couple of years ago, we had tons of friends down for new year's .  We all had houses on this island, and were all there to party for a week or so.  Most of these people, including a dixie chick!  haha not joking, were...
    FiFiDelmar FiFiDelmar 46-50, F 1 Response Feb 1, 2008

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    I Have No Shame

    This is from my blog. If you like this story you should check out my blog at brutallyhonest81.blogspot.com I’m sharing this story out of pure entertainment. I’m not proud of it. My husband seems to find this one of the funniest things I’ve ever told him. So, here we go...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses May 14, 2012

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    My Name Is Adam, and I Am An Alcoholic!

    I have too many drunken stories to share with you all right here but I do however have my own website with loads of my drunken stories and I would be honored if you would allow me to regale you with epic tales of misadventure. Also I am always looking for fun people to get drunk...
    wwwDOTadamlovesfatgirlsDOTcom wwwDOTadamlovesfatgirlsDOTcom 22-25 Nov 4, 2008

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    A Funny Strange Not Funny Hilarious Drunk Story

    Hello! We know a lady who decided to move from Alberta to Vancouver Island a few years ago. She was having a hard time getting her things packed up as well as work a 10 hour day 7 days a week so her alcoholic father decided he would help. One day well she was at work he went...
    Nanoose Nanoose 51-55, M 2 Responses Mar 8, 2008

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    I Have A Few ...

    a short but funny one: After WAY too many pints at a pub, I walked (stumbled? staggered) home in bare feet because my shoes were killing me. once I got in the door, I kept telling myself I had to wash my feet before going to bed. For some reason, washing them in the sink, rather...
    beerchick beerchick 26-30, F 11 Responses Sep 29, 2012

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    So I got drunk at a party

    and started dancing with a girl... One thing led to another and I ended up breaking a wall with my *** 😐
    catchphrasejones catchphrasejones 18-21, M 1 Response Apr 3

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    Last Night

    So last night i was so drunk and i just wanted to pass out but i had to go home 1st so i get to my apartment door and the door is locked so i just sit in front of the door half passed out and my neighbor that i don't even know sees me and next thing i know my brother wakes me up...
    sexytime567 sexytime567 16-17 1 Response Sep 28, 2012

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    I Hate This Avatar,

    story will follow, once proper avatar is in place.  make that storIES
    FiFiDelmar FiFiDelmar 46-50, F 14 Responses Jan 22, 2008

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    Drunk People!

    Ok, so my friend just started calling me saying repeatedly for me to answer the door, so I let him in. Then he yawned... While doing this it made a slight growl sound... His next reaction was to shout out that he's a tiger, went on for 30 mins.... Wow... He's going to have such a...
    Libbythomas Libbythomas 13-15, F Oct 4, 2013

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    One Time

    One time we were soooo bombed, We went to a Mc Donalds and tried to Order Tacos LOL, and the funny part was we were actually serious we thought it was a taco joint LOL.
    siggy10 siggy10 31-35, M 3 Responses Oct 22, 2009

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    My Ride With the Banditos

    This is a good one.  My husband was in law school when we had our first child.  Most of our circle of friends were all his classmates.  About four months after I had the baby, the school had their annual "gathering" at a local bar.  Once a year...
    FiFiDelmar FiFiDelmar 46-50, F 3 Responses Feb 1, 2008

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    Broken Windows

    I wish i had a dollar for every time that we lost our keys and had to break a window to get into the house. 
    FiFiDelmar FiFiDelmar 46-50, F 28 Responses Feb 3, 2008

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    My Funniest Blackout Story

    It was during my "euro trip" following graduation from high school. I went out drinking in bars for the first time with my uncle and brother in Finland during the 2010 World Cup. Obviously the bars were pretty crazy and we were hopping around drinking with lots of different...
    Seabass20 Seabass20 18-21, M 2 Responses Aug 20, 2012

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    I'm a Crazy Drinker Then Eater

    So, in my usual life, I do not eat much.  I love food, but love being thin more.  So, what happens is that when i drink, i EAT.  I eat like a crazed lunatic.  There are many, many stories of me and my drunken eating.  One that comes to mind is after an...
    FiFiDelmar FiFiDelmar 46-50, F 5 Responses Feb 1, 2008

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    Opps

    Hello! Once there was a guy at the local pub and he was being an annoying pig to a couple of ladies. He wouldn't take the advice to settle down so when he walked past me I tripped him and then said, hey look the ladies are laughing at you - I think they like you now...
    Nanoose Nanoose 51-55, M 1 Response Feb 8, 2008

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    I Have a Couple of Hilarious Drunk Stories.

    My first one might not sound so hilarious to some people but it has a happy ending. Once I was sitting at a table in a bar and one of my buddies had a bit too much to drink  so he excused him self to go to the washroom. He only made it as far as the next table and puked...
    Nanoose Nanoose 51-55, M 5 Responses Feb 4, 2008

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    Hilarious Facts !!!!!

    few r funny.........few r crazy...few r dirty....few r sad..........let me start1) we, friends were drinking in my apartment....everybody was on high....started playing truth or dare with beer bottle...there was bet on that....i selected dare and as i didnt wanna loose, i kissed...
    destinyguy destinyguy 26-30, M 3 Responses Feb 13, 2011

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    Cab From Florida to Michigan

    I once got so drunk in Florida I didn't think they would let me on the plane so I took a cab home...to Michigan! Its a long story and I really don't feel like retyping it. Its on a blog at www.alcoholichumor.com
    alcoholichumor alcoholichumor 46-50 Feb 1, 2009

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    Uhg, the Things That Happen.

    I recall when much younger that it wasn't a big deal when one woke up after a sleep over with friends that you would all end up on the floor in a tangle of limbs. Now that I'm a little older and of course loving the life of being able to drink. I find it weird when I wake up...
    SkaterGuyReid SkaterGuyReid 16-18, M 2 Responses Apr 9, 2008

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    Mexico

    One of our many, many trips to Mexico, my bf was so drunk that we had to put him in a grocery cart and push him  back across the border.  Another time, we went to "boy's town" and this one bar was advertising "the donkey show".  suggesting sex...
    FiFiDelmar FiFiDelmar 46-50, F 4 Responses Feb 5, 2008

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    Related Experiences

    I am, really. Looking back, I see that I'm loyal to my good friends. I'm an excellent listener. I'm introspective, which leads me toward an ability for empathy. I've been through a...
    LysistratasWeakness2 LysistratasWeakness2 51-55, M 1 Response Apr 13

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    So, my moms friend called me that my mom is at the bar and i need to convince her to get home. It was 12 AM and i went to that bar even tho i'am 13 years old, My mother was...
    vikquinn6 vikquinn6 13-15, F 1 Response 3 hrs ago

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    So I come from a pretty poor background. (not going to bore you with the whole long sad sappy story) Any way I'm 18 now, married, with a 3 year old daughter. I have my own house...
    Rskittles Rskittles 18-21 4 hrs ago

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    People who judge me based on what I wear or because I have piercings and tattoos. Especially those who say "how do you expect to get a job with those." News flash, it's 2014... I...
    DarkHorse18 DarkHorse18 18-21, F 15 hrs ago

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    I don't even know how to start expressing my feelings... There are three guys I refused to go out with this week. I like two of them. Guy 1 wants to take me to a movie and eat...
    CastDownChloe CastDownChloe 22-25, F 3 Responses Apr 13

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    Since i've been young, my mother has always been drinking. It wasn't that much whilst i was younger but i wish i had not been have to do the things i did. I have multiple stories...
    Soldottern Soldottern 16-17, F 1 Response Apr 15

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    Would love to post some true stories about when everything was fresh and hot between me and my wife.
    Cypher4 Cypher4 31-35, M 1 Response 10 hrs ago

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    It's just a hobby of mine but I love it so much! I publish my stories anonymously on a website called quotev.com. i'm currently working on a story on there called The Death...
    udamansteel udamansteel 16-17, F 6 hrs ago

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    Why I Have Only Added Four People In My Year Okay lets start from the beginning shall we? I was a nervous and immature 11 year old about to start her first day at a new school. My...
    Thatchick93 Thatchick93 18-21, F 3 Responses 9 hrs ago

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    Ever since I can remember, I've had vivid, detailed, intricate story dreams more frequently than any other kind. The people I know in real life rarely make an appearance, and I'm...
    glassbox27 glassbox27 26-30, F 1 Response 7 hrs ago

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    Reading these stories lets me know I'm not alone. When I met my fiancé he was just getting out of a seven year relationship I thought it was odd that she moved out with 2 kids in...
    Walkedinblind Walkedinblind 31-35, F 1 Response Apr 10

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    Do people come back from heroin? Are there ANY good stories with HAPPY endings? Any HOPEFUL advice? Or just leave? I try to stay hopeful and positive but it is HARD. Its a very...
    ammyyy ammyyy 26-30, F 3 Responses 23 hrs ago

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    I do not really believe in soul-mates and I am not a very romantic person, but I have come across some events lately that changed my heart and my thoughts on this matter. I would...
    LIDDIAliddia LIDDIAliddia 26-30 17 hrs ago

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    she's a great friend but she is very annoying at times. example (happened today): "why you're not wearing your HIGH CUT converse today, your EXPENSIVE shoes." me "why? hmm.. why...
    rsddhj rsddhj 13-15, F 16 hrs ago

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    I'm 20 years old and about 10 months ago I was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism and later Graves' Disease. For a long time I just assumed that I was a lazy person and being really...
    emwisemannn emwisemannn 18-21 7 hrs ago

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    Omfg I'm freakin dying of laughter. I think I'm hilarious on EP :')) and the funniest thing is when people get pissed off by my sarcasm X'D omfg I CANT BREATHE!!
    ILoveBearGryllz55 ILoveBearGryllz55 16-17, F Apr 5

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    When I get drunk I tend to take my clothes off and want to be all over someone lol. Once, I got drunk with my friends and we went streaking. Also I got drunk at a party and tried...
    ReeseThompson0424 ReeseThompson0424 18-21, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    Being drunk is fun. I am drunk right now in fact. It's not as fun as being high on other drugs--remember, alcohol is a drug--and you have to consume a lot of alcohol to get drunk...
    Qataram Qataram 36-40, M 1 Response Apr 6

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    • : A POOR’S AMBITION . Sitting here, watching the world swirl by in their ready-to-hit-the-runway clothing and swiftly-running cars, was a girl...
    ExperiencesAndNotMistakes ExperiencesAndNotMistakes 16-17, F 2 days ago

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    I feel like the biggest piece of scum on the planet. I was celebrating my friends 20th birthday and made the decision to drive around town drunk. I've driven buzzed before and felt...
    browniesnoops browniesnoops 18-21, M 2 Responses Mar 31

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    Let me just admit.. I associate drinking with 'feeling better' emotionally. I got drunk last night and made a total ******* fool out of myself. I texted a friend I miss and told...
    freeebird freeebird 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 5

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    So last night I went for a meal with friends and decided that I didn't want to go home at the reasonable hour everyone else did, this meant I went to another bar by myself (luckily...
    Daisy15951 Daisy15951 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 5

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    Let's just say live everyone else I'm not myself when I'm drunk I do stupid things again like every other drunk lol
    Maddya Maddya 18-21, F 3 Responses Apr 10

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    I am on an amazing nyc vacation for the first night and my boyfriend got so drunk in the bar of our hotel room while I was in the shower. He was so drunk that three hours later he...
    thatgirlkay thatgirlkay 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 15

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