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I Have Let Myself Down

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 208 People

    Stress and despair have gotten a hold of my

    soul. I never read the books I love anymore, I hardly remember to pray, and staying fit has become nothing more than an afterthought. To step back and look at where I have ended up now compared to before is so belittling, because I know I have the potential to be something...
    AcousticArdor22 AcousticArdor22 22-25, M 1 Response May 27, 2014

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    Today i earned some money by being a glory hole

    *****. I really needed that money to buy a monthly train tickets which cost alot. I sucked lots of **** and barely any of them gave me tip. Why would they. This is probably a new low for me.
    JennyLovely JennyLovely 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 3, 2015

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    once again...as always.

    ...I always set goals for myself that I want to achieve but I always seem to fail and it makes me so disappointed in myself and makes me feel like a loser...I always give up halfway and I don't know why
    SomeGirlS SomeGirlS 18-21, F 3 Responses Jul 23, 2014

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    I have tried suicide 3 times.

    WHY WONT IT Work!!!!???
    lonelyafraid4lifr lonelyafraid4lifr 22-25, F 18 Responses May 27, 2014

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    I Use to Be...

    ...the person who everyone looked up to.  I was self-sufficient, independent, and didn't have a care in the world.  If someone was doing me wrong, I immediately removed that person from my life.  If something wasn't going the way I thought it should, I figured out...
    QueenD QueenD 31-35, F 2 Responses Jul 2, 2008

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    I Have...and I Will Build Myself Up

    I have let myself down I am nothing like I use to be. I was vibrant, sexy, and full of life. I miss that..I decided I am going to work for it back. I want to live life and be happy. I know its going to take allot of hard work, but hey I am up for the challenge. I know that the...
    MiseducatedChik MiseducatedChik 26-30, F Apr 11, 2008

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    I just hate myself so

    so much.wish I could beat my dark side soon."There are those who say fate is something beyond our command. That destiny is not our own, but I know better. Our fate lives within us, you only have to be brave enough...
    Iskskskdjjzzjjxjxjx Iskskskdjjzzjjxjxjx 13-15, F 2 Responses Mar 3, 2014

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    Actually...

    I let myself go. Physically. It's a long boring story, but that's the gist. I'm finally doing something about it, though. After many, many years of beating myself up and guilt I finally cracked.
    LostRach LostRach 26-30, F Feb 8, 2008

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    My 3 year training contract ends in July.

    There is another trainee in the same year as me, but I feel as though he is more liked than me, because he's more of a 'man' than me. Firstly, I am by far more intelligent than him; I went to college and I studied maths, English, physics and geography. I'm a better driver and I...
    ShaunSAP ShaunSAP 18-21, M Mar 23, 2015

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    I started off strong

    when i told him i wasnt going to let him make me do things without there being something between us first. I kept it up for 1-2 days an then i cracked and did whatever he wanted. I am so angry at myself for getting me into this situation where i am pretty sure he's come bored of...
    ThisChica ThisChica 18-21, F 2 Responses Feb 23, 2014

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    Related Experiences

    I do share my pics of my naked wife. PM if you are interested
    grampsd grampsd 70+, M 6 Responses 1 day ago

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    I don't know why I maybe never will maybe do it again just maybe
    leahxlife leahxlife 13-15, F 2 days ago

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    Dear J. You don't realise it but I have so much to thank you for. I have always felt at work that I have had to be strong and get on with it all. I have got used to having no...
    Jenni855 Jenni855 26-30, F 2 days ago

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    Everynight for the past two weeks but its all good
    Pandalover7 Pandalover7 18-21, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I will never be anyones first choice....
    Nina10011 Nina10011 13-15, F 3 days ago

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    i started when i was 12 and if felt good
    jamal1986 jamal1986 26-30, M 3 days ago

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    My belly is feeling so big and soft and jiggly today it makes me want to make it expand even more!
    New2fat71 New2fat71 41-45, F 3 days ago

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    It was a Saturday, around nine o'clock. I remember I had been feeling particularly apathetic that day, since a second, strong bout of depression had hit me the beginning of that...
    Kaoruk100 Kaoruk100 18-21, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    I am also on the fence about this losing control is a big turn on for me and I've bloated myself a few times and my pig outs are becoming more frequent and my BMI has shot up from...
    Exovirus Exovirus 18-21, F 4 Responses 4 days ago

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    messed up nightmares that wake me up to my body shivering. and then i need a lot of time to calm myself down
    sadcookiemonster sadcookiemonster 18-21, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    I started taking medication for my depression about 8 years ago, though I suffered from it for at least 10 years prior to that. I would try a medicine, slowly have it upped and...
    Ikid Ikid 22-25 1 Response 5 days ago

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    I've been called cute before by several people (I'm a guy lol) and I don't see it. maybe it's because my self esteem was brought down when I was 7 because u was overweight. I have...
    Fainmail67 Fainmail67 13-15, M 6 days ago

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    Fatal illness is no excuse for being weak. I gave three individuals life but my lungs are a little more than half functional and my hopefully soon-to-be ex-husband vented his anger...
    tdwolfe87 tdwolfe87 26-30, F 6 days ago

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    I hate myself. I hate my temptation. I hate how I allow myself to be so fragile. I hate how I let people take advantage of me. I hate how everyone think that I'm this great person...
    ashlenamya66359 ashlenamya66359 22-25, F 6 days ago

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    Empty. It's the only word that comes to mind. When inside my head it's everything but,.... So many conflictions inside myself. When insides are Violent, Violet, blue, green, sad...
    Sometimesilence Sometimesilence 18-21, F 6 days ago

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    He feeds off of my suffering. He doesn't just feed off of it, he finds it DELICIOUS. I know this because I have FELT what he feels before. It is HORRIFIC to feel the sheer amount...
    Hush92 Hush92 18-21, F Jan 30

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    We have a mentor/mentee relationship albeit a friendly and casual one. Today he crossed a line: he initiated an innuendo. I can't help but think sometimes that he cares about me...
    jollybeanses jollybeanses 41-45, F Jan 30

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    Sitting here at work with the door shut and a raging hard-on. Reading EP stories and watching some **** on my cell phone. Been fondling my balls and stroking my shaft. If I don't...
    ivegot5onit ivegot5onit 31-35, M 1 Response Jan 29

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    I used to do this with an ex friend. It's easier to get along with someone that's more interested in judging others and gossiping when I pretend the lights are on and nobody is...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jan 29

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    I haven't been on this website for at least 2 years. And I can't say that anything's changed, at least not w/ regards to this issue. I'm still purging frequently. My eating is...
    feelingfoolishlame feelingfoolishlame 18-21, F Jan 28

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    So first he says that it's ok, if I don't send a picture, then gets uppity when I say no. Earlier on, he acted as if I had verbally attacked him, when all I was saying that I wasn...
    FatalOrca FatalOrca 18-21, F 3 Responses Jan 28

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    I get heart beating real fast in places and at work now I am in break room using freezer to cool myself down. I have a presentation in few min and trying focus .
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jan 28

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    I actually still have the letter in my drawer. I wrote it with a red pen , because well, it was a love letter lol. Obviously i never sent it but it's nice to read over it again. It...
    SugarPlumDreams SugarPlumDreams 31-35, F 1 Response Jan 27

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    I've been holding and drinking juice all day.. almost to the breaking point. For last hour thinking about it, at work, whether I was going to go in a bottle in the break area and...
    3penthesilea 3penthesilea 46-50, F 9 Responses Jan 26

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    I seems to get triggered easily.wonder why
    Bryanisflyinglol Bryanisflyinglol 16-17, M Jan 25

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    I felt my anxiety begin to rise earlier so I decided to meditate to calm myself down and make light of the storm I am facing. I learned a few things in my meditation. For one, for...
    Negrita13131 Negrita13131 26-30, F 2 Responses Jan 25

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    In my opinion my arms look better with cuts on them
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jan 25

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    Looking back on the last 3 years of my 15 year marriage I learned a lot. A lot of things I chose to put up with, turn a blind eye to, let myself become his employee. When I woke...
    littlefroghere littlefroghere 41-45, F Jan 25

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    The way our cubes were setup at work we had tall walls and I had a wall to my back and only one cube in front me. I have pulled it out on many occasions at my desk. I've...
    justallofme justallofme 31-35, M 2 Responses Jan 24

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    -Trigger Warning- I was in my bathroom, looking at myself in pure disgust.. I had my shaving razor in one hand and my other hand shaking along with the rest of myself. I'm not...
    Vlette Vlette 16-17, F 1 Response Jan 23

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    I feel like the most negative person on earth, I feel like I hurt everyone who comes near me, I feel that if I talk to a person about all that's going through my head I'll make...
    Silentsuffer Silentsuffer 13-15, F 1 Response Jan 22

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