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I Have Lived In Fear For Most of My Life

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 115 People

    Motivated By Fear

    I had a discussion with my boyfriend about Super Mario Galaxy. I always tend to be highly stressed when I'm playing and he wanted to know why. I told him that I was motivated by fear of losing, whereas he was motivated by winning. We have decided that if I want to play that he...
    ameeker ameeker 21-25, F Nov 28, 2007

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    Safe Now... It Still Feels Odd

    I am 34 years old.  The first 32 years of my life I was squashed beneath my father's thumb.  He beat me down, both physically and emotionally until I couldn't even think of rebelling.  I knew that if I ever put a toe out of line I was up for a beating...if I was lucky.Far...
    Plaid Plaid 31-35, F 2 Responses Feb 3, 2012

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    BEING Hated and Indirect Blame of Somebody Elses Crime.

    BECAUSE i WAS A VICTIM OF RAPE BY MORE THAN 1 MEMBER OF MY FAMILY, i WAS DESPISED AND HATED AND MADE TO FEEL LIKE SCUM FOR SOMETHING THAT HAPPENED THAT WAS NOT OF MY DOIMG I WAS FORCED AND RAPED. mY MOTHER DID NOT CONTACT THE POLICE, INSTEAD SHE TOLD ALL MY RELATIVES WHO WENT...
    MPA123 MPA123 51-55 Sep 1, 2008

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    A Life Full Of Fear

    Well for those of you who have read my previous stories i will skip ahead, for those of you who haven't... read it :)... but i'll still summerize. When i was younger from the time i was born till the time i was 11 years old i was living with an abusive father and watching him...
    gardengirl17 gardengirl17 22-25, F Jul 31, 2011

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    Mom is protective, she tell me everything

    that could go wrong, I live in fear , I do everything carefully, exhausting, feeling so negative Dad yells at me, his way of telling want he wants, I lived to please him, still feeling not enough, not good enough. He wants me to listen , he doesn't hear me. I didn't know when I...
    Mangostrawberrybanana Mangostrawberrybanana 31-35, F 1 Response Aug 15, 2014

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    Yeah I Have....

    I spend a lot of my time in fear. But not for me. My moms a b!tch. And she loves to throw her authority around me. She says I'm the special child, to stupid to figure anything out. I may be young, but I'm not stupid. I may not be book smart, but I'm street smart. I can take care...
    Iamawerewolf Iamawerewolf 18-21, F May 25, 2013

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    Fear...

    ...was the thing that kept me away from everything else for most of my life. Now, after my therapy I am starting to live like a normal person. People who know me do not know about my problem. They think I am a normal girl just like everybody else who goes to work everyday and...
    MarMar1487 MarMar1487 22-25, F 2 Responses Mar 3, 2008

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    Constant Vigilance

    He stole my innocence. So I put him in prison. He molested me for the better part of a year. My sister too. I finally found the strength to tell my mom. I'm so glad that she is as strong as she is. She put him away. Soon after we got a guard dog. But everyday I look over my...
    ThatPrincessCharm ThatPrincessCharm 18-21, F Sep 3, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    I have two fears: Genophobia and/or Coitophobia: fear of sexual activity Aichmophobia: fear of sharp objects
    Annabeth11 Annabeth11 13-15, F 1 Response Jan 15

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    i fear living my life only knowing half the joy i could have if i had only pursued my dreams
    restless09 restless09 70+ 4 days ago

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    Right Now......like most times I have this point in my life where I focus on myself listen to some really sexual music or depressing either way, to make myself feel better. Make...
    CurvyFrance CurvyFrance 13-15, F Jan 3

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    Ever lie in bed looking at the ceiling just swamped with gratitude for the life that you have? There aren't gunshots outside my window, everyone I love is healthy. Snuggled into my...
    justNIK justNIK 41-45, F 4 days ago

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    Well I've met my soulmate we both agree on this. As a normal couple have a few issues with executing each other's flaws when it's only going to improve us both for better and...
    RonSims RonSims 31-35, M 1 Response Jan 18

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    I have a heart for the broken. Broken hearts, broken homes. Voids which seem so magnified. Loneliness which surround them. The longing in which they have within to feel loved...
    SecretEscape SecretEscape 36-40, F 3 Responses Jan 18

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    I haven't eaten for 3 days now... Yep... Don't judge.
    SweetAlone13 SweetAlone13 13-15, F Jan 4

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    Not just men that are disrespectful..... I have lost respect for anyone that is disrespectful
    ElissaAcosta ElissaAcosta 16-17, F a week ago

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    my fear of getting hurt again controls my life.. ive built up walls around myself.. no one can hurt me now.. except ive blocked out the ones that want to help
    classylips classylips 13-15, F Dec 29, 2014

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    if fear stopped controlling my life, it'd be as if I stopped breathing. that's just the reality of things :/
    meli347 meli347 13-15, F Dec 30, 2014

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    That's about the entirety of it in a nut shell. I fell for a girl when she was 17, I 18. We had a very intense, deep love for only 3 months time. After 9 years of remaining...
    jsc0tzi jsc0tzi 26-30, M 3 days ago

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    I fear a lot of things like love, rejection , being alone, what I'm going to be in the future it's honestly scary. I hope this changes.
    t3rriv t3rriv 16-17, F 1 Response Dec 29, 2014

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    Growing up, I had 4 of the most important people in my childhood leave me. In kindergarten to second grade, I had a best friend who only hung out with me out of convience, she...
    Ginkofishin Ginkofishin 18-21, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    The twenty-second day of January is the worst date on the calendar for me. It is the day that my older brother took his own life and forever changed mine. It was the New Year’s...
    miryam57 miryam57 56-60, F 1 Response Jan 19

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    Once again, I don't mean literally other lifetimes. I mean this one. Tonight I was thinking of the past. The night after we got married. I was thinking of how happy we were. Good...
    chimbie88 chimbie88 31-35, M Jan 21

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    Since I finished school life everything changed - from socially,emotionally,psychologically to more responsibilities!So i've learnt so much in 6 years about myself, my health...
    MilweePetite MilweePetite 18-21, F 6 days ago

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    As we enter in to the twilight of Yet another 12 months, you may find yourself questioning in which some time went. A lot of has changed given that we have been ringing in The...
    Alexander0493fzr1 Alexander0493fzr1 31-35, M 1 Response Jan 7

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    From 1990-2003 I lived in Fairbanks Alaska and Manly Hot Springs, AK I loved it, but then my work brought me back to the lower 48. If you ever have a chance to visit Alaska its...
    nylonbritches nylonbritches 51-55, M 3 days ago

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    I'm afraid of being alone and losing those who are close to me. I'm also afraid of being a failure in life. On the bright side, I got over my childhood arachnophobia many years...
    84wraith 84wraith 22-25, M 1 Response Jan 15

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    life is so boring. Not many friends, no relationships, spend most of my time alone, don't enjoy living very much
    washington350 washington350 36-40, M Jan 5

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    All I want is a love that will last til the end of my lifetime! It seems like it must be too much to ask for. Met my 3rd husband years ago and was so happy but now he has cheated...
    Cyndie67 Cyndie67 46-50, F 2 Responses Jan 18

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    Oblivion, but no, I have to add more characters.
    throughthedoorway throughthedoorway 13-15, F Dec 30, 2014

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    I was racially abused and traumatised at hotel du vin in Brighton by two managers who hated me coz I'm a dark skinned Asian looking lady There was nothing I could do they just...
    lostsouluk lostsouluk 31-35, F 5 Responses Jan 4

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    I don't want things to go wrong... I protect myself from bad things happening.... But at the moment my guard is down... It scares me at times.. So much distance, but it doesn't...
    catho catho 18-21, F Jan 8

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    I have never, never been on my own. went from parent's home to being preganant and married at eighteen. I am afraid of being alone. maybe that's why I don't leave. or maybr I don...
    regalshewolf regalshewolf 41-45, F Jan 8

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    Have a long term relationship with doors... the seem to always want me walking into them.. im getting worried that they are coming onto me..help?
    crazygirlpoet crazygirlpoet 18-21 Jan 19

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    If you are in love with someone that you agreed to do a friends with benefits thing with and they know. STOP that crap right now because they don't really care about you. Or if you...
    mypawshaveprints mypawshaveprints 18-21, F Dec 29, 2014

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    In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.
    TheLivingDead TheLivingDead 18-21, F 5 days ago

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    Mind you, the Swiss banking system isn't to blame this on at all. Their laws are rather elaborate. It is corrupt men and women in high places, who are accountable to give such a...
    Georgebankssi1 Georgebankssi1 31-35, M 1 Response Jan 2

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    Feel like running away or dying cause just had enough of how people treat me and talk to me and sick of feeling so **** about myself and not being understand I can't trust anyone...
    abscar1990 abscar1990 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 6

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    If you are isolated from certain groups of people who don't look like you and spend too much time watching tv, chances are you are racist. So if you live somewhere in I don't know...
    theslyfox theslyfox 31-35, M Jan 18

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    So m33lad has been writing rather disgusting comments to women consecutively here I've unfortunately been a witness to many of his comments I answered him with factual information...
    MNI1982 MNI1982 31-35, F 6 Responses a week ago

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    Take heed... http://www.msn.com/en-gb/health/familyhealth/study-reveals-the-most-dangerous-sex-position
    nunos nunos 51-55, M 5 Responses 6 days ago

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    After completing highschool.. a chapter in my story, wonders happened.I took a path which I wasn't supposed to take but I am happy with it and I have known I am work in progress...
    ThisIsMeYeah ThisIsMeYeah 18-21, F 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    We Indians have a great culture.But unfortunately most of us are just losing sight of our great heritage.We are copying from others what is harmful.Wake up ,Indians ,and let the...
    restored87 restored87 46-50, F 4 Responses 2 days ago

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    I grew up having a preference towards hanging out with foreign people . I'm not saying I don't have any friends IRL but for the most part I have a hard time communicating with the...
    DoctorOniichan DoctorOniichan 22-25, M 1 Response Dec 30, 2014

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    Diffrent as the day and night Perceptions of wrong and right Everything is a blatent lie Hiding right before your eyes Contradictions everywhere Are you even really there? Bear...
    Ashthewolf7601 Ashthewolf7601 13-15, F Jan 7

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    After numerous attempts to set boundaries, months of not speaking , forgiving and multiple chances, I have to let her go. She still has my brother who she thinks is the best since...
    sgg2013 sgg2013 46-50, F Jan 8

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