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I Have Lived In Fear For Most of My Life

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 117 People

    BEING Hated and Indirect Blame of Somebody Elses Crime.

    BECAUSE i WAS A VICTIM OF RAPE BY MORE THAN 1 MEMBER OF MY FAMILY, i WAS DESPISED AND HATED AND MADE TO FEEL LIKE SCUM FOR SOMETHING THAT HAPPENED THAT WAS NOT OF MY DOIMG I WAS FORCED AND RAPED. mY MOTHER DID NOT CONTACT THE POLICE, INSTEAD SHE TOLD ALL MY RELATIVES WHO WENT...
    MPA123 MPA123 51-55 Sep 1, 2008

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    Yeah I Have....

    I spend a lot of my time in fear. But not for me. My moms a b!tch. And she loves to throw her authority around me. She says I'm the special child, to stupid to figure anything out. I may be young, but I'm not stupid. I may not be book smart, but I'm street smart. I can take care...
    Iamawerewolf Iamawerewolf 18-21, F May 25, 2013

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    Mom is protective, she tell me everything

    that could go wrong, I live in fear , I do everything carefully, exhausting, feeling so negative Dad yells at me, his way of telling want he wants, I lived to please him, still feeling not enough, not good enough. He wants me to listen , he doesn't hear me. I didn't know when I...
    Mangostrawberrybanana Mangostrawberrybanana 31-35, F Aug 15, 2014

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    A Life Full Of Fear

    Well for those of you who have read my previous stories i will skip ahead, for those of you who haven't... read it :)... but i'll still summerize. When i was younger from the time i was born till the time i was 11 years old i was living with an abusive father and watching him...
    gardengirl17 gardengirl17 22-25, F Jul 31, 2011

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    Safe Now... It Still Feels Odd

    I am 34 years old.  The first 32 years of my life I was squashed beneath my father's thumb.  He beat me down, both physically and emotionally until I couldn't even think of rebelling.  I knew that if I ever put a toe out of line I was up for a beating...if I was lucky.Far...
    Plaid Plaid 31-35, F 2 Responses Feb 3, 2012

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    Motivated By Fear

    I had a discussion with my boyfriend about Super Mario Galaxy. I always tend to be highly stressed when I'm playing and he wanted to know why. I told him that I was motivated by fear of losing, whereas he was motivated by winning. We have decided that if I want to play that he...
    ameeker ameeker 18-21, F Nov 28, 2007

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    Fear...

    ...was the thing that kept me away from everything else for most of my life. Now, after my therapy I am starting to live like a normal person. People who know me do not know about my problem. They think I am a normal girl just like everybody else who goes to work everyday and...
    MarMar1487 MarMar1487 22-25, F 2 Responses Mar 3, 2008

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    Constant Vigilance

    He stole my innocence. So I put him in prison. He molested me for the better part of a year. My sister too. I finally found the strength to tell my mom. I'm so glad that she is as strong as she is. She put him away. Soon after we got a guard dog. But everyday I look over my...
    ThatPrincessCharm ThatPrincessCharm 18-21, F Sep 3, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    I've honestly never had friends, not even as a small child. I was always that one quiet kid that everyone thought was creepy or weird that played alone in the graveyard while...
    MechaKimochii MechaKimochii 18-21, F Apr 3

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    My mom was doing yard work this morning. She is trying to clear out the back portion of our back yard for a small garden. When she clipped a snarled tree branch, a little birds...
    Annaelaine Annaelaine 16-17, F Mar 29

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    Gotta Get Me One by Twista is life . I have a love for "slow jukin'" music .
    Alylovespuppies Alylovespuppies 18-21, F 6 days ago

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    I have nothing more to say than I have changed , but for the worst. I am evil. I feel this is my destiny for me to be evil.
    Thedepressedgirlatthewindow Thedepressedgirlatthewindow 16-17, F Mar 28

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    i have a weakness for building muscles but still i cant isolate those bicep muscles.
    279g465 279g465 22-25, M Apr 11

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    His preference does NOT make him any less physically attractive. He is the most good looking man I have ever seen (onscreen or in person). And I have seen him in person! :D
    MagHow MagHow 22-25, F 6 hrs ago

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    "I think the purpose of life is to be useful, to be responsible, to be honorable, to be compassionate. It is, after all, to matter: to count, to stand for something, to have made...
    Katie419 Katie419 22-25, F 2 Responses Apr 2

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    Fear is real... The fear has been fulfilled, it has it's reasons to stay now :/
    Catho Catho 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 5

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    Sometimes the fear is so extreme I feel like I have to end myself. I don't want to end myself but I also don't want to live half scared to death on the inside all the time. Bleh...
    madlibb madlibb 16-17, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    My life has been pretty amazing. And I've had some moments I'll always cherish. Like movie-fantasy-romantic type ****. I've been so completely in love that I lost myself in him...
    PraiseBeToYevon PraiseBeToYevon 31-35, F 1 Response Apr 1

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    Phcology meeting today, to see how I was going... After telling this phycologist all the close friends that had left me and walked out of my life, I felt gutted :/ I felt like I...
    Catho Catho 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 9

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    The main one is alcohol- I am terrified of just being around it. The smell of it makes me gag, and the sight of it makes me feel faint. This has been happening quite a lot lately...
    chasetheweirdo8 chasetheweirdo8 13-15, M 7 Responses Apr 13

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    The short animated film The alchemist's letter beautifully translates the tale of feeling of abandonment and love. Not a wasted frame where each piece holds some form of symbolism...
    PessimisticPenguin PessimisticPenguin 31-35, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I really really really dread the 9-5 working life that most likely i will be going through in 4 to 5 years time. The boring routine goes from waking up to working and at the end of...
    cy94 cy94 18-21, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    We all wear masks. We all harbor a 'dark' side, or a bad habit that we don't want anybody else to know about. In EP where we remain anonymous, therefore free to write just about...
    stiltcourt stiltcourt 41-45, F 2 Responses Mar 30

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    ive already been abandon hasnt talked to my best and only friend in 4 months hasnt talked to or been hugged by another female in 3 years and my family must of forgot i existed
    ThatOneLeo ThatOneLeo 18-21, M 2 Responses Apr 6

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    Each of us is by turns a novice and a master, until the next difficulty or joy undoes us. But I believe, that each person is born with an unencumbered spot, free of expectation and...
    stiltcourt stiltcourt 41-45, F 2 Responses Apr 6

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    My step mom and her kids, 2 boys and 1 girl took me in for a bit last year becouse my dad got arrested. When they did i would have to get up early in the morning before anyone else...
    cece14779 cece14779 13-15, F 1 Response a week ago

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    It's just hit me how ******* alone I am, I make such a big deal about the man who currently obtains all my affections and really would like to be his lover but evenings like this...
    mrscrowley mrscrowley 18-21, F 2 days ago

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    All my life I've been ostracized, rejected and bullied for being autistic. Even by family. I never get that bond or sense of belonging that most people seem to have.
    UnwantedPup UnwantedPup 31-35, T 3 days ago

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    I'm 13 and I wear a size 12. I was chubby/fat since I was born. And on top of that, I have big bones and a lot of extra skin, short as well. I was made fun of all my life because...
    KidLeftInTheDark KidLeftInTheDark 13-15, F 9 Responses Apr 3

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    there are some mistakes we make that haunt us for life. the kinda mistakes i hate to make
    Cubeball Cubeball 18-21, M 1 Response Apr 9

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    Was driving my kids to church today and as usual, I have my retro CD on in the car. I had my almost three year old siting in the front strapped in his car seat. Sunshine by...
    AthenaJones AthenaJones 36-40, F 5 Responses Apr 18

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    I feel I'm to much for people because I bother them or I'm to weird or that I just say sorry a lot when I don't need too. sometimes I just wish I could talk to someone that can...
    devanking15 devanking15 13-15, F a week ago

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    I've always been bigger than every one around me since 4th grade and even to the present. I'm miserable. It's stopped me from enjoying my life and always in the way of allowing me...
    ghozty ghozty 26-30, M 2 days ago

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    I'm a dress size 18-20 and my bra size is 40C, it's so hard to find my bra size anywhere because I have a big back strap size but small cup. I wish I had bigger boobs. I hate my...
    Fierrrrce Fierrrrce 18-21, F 3 Responses Apr 3

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    i read it earlier...it makes more sense passing it on... "be glad for yesterday, its made you who you are today"
    Djdan203 Djdan203 31-35, M 1 Response Mar 27

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    me and my girlfriend love each other. i mean love. we have been in a relationship for almost 5 years. and we plan to move in together after college into our own home. (we already...
    ValiToytiki ValiToytiki 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 27

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    “I don't expect life to make sense," he said after a few moments, "but it could certainly be pleasant if it would stop kicking us in the balls.” ― Scott Lynch, The Republic...
    thehonestgentleman thehonestgentleman 18-21, M Mar 29

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    Write about your experienceThere are numerous older men in the world who are single and seeking someone special in their life. For all such men, AgeMeet.com has been created as a...
    caraccaa caraccaa 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 7

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    i wish meeting people in real life was as easy as it is on here
    ragingoutlaw ragingoutlaw 26-30, M 1 Response 4 days ago

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    As much as I hate some aspects of the army I've always been told I should, and have wanted to marry a army recruit. Just the thought of the joy you get when they come home and you...
    Frankiehw Frankiehw 16-17, F 3 days ago

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    Lmao omg. If I had a dollar for every time I heard this. #doyouevenbelieveyou?
    ClaireH19 ClaireH19 18-21, F Mar 27

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