I Have Low Self Esteem - Forum & Chat Board | never again!!

Hi all. I am new to this site and I was just wondering if anybody has had an experience which has made then realise just how bad you self esteem and confidence has got?

I am interested in sharing stories as I have recently gone through something which has left me kicking myself......this has got to stop!

My mood: extremely apathetic
 

Hey Sweetface,

Well, my low self esteem took a battering last year when I lost my job. I have always been  people pleaser but it definitely got worse when i lost my job.

I started working in a pub to earn a bit of money and I got to know guy who came into the pub regularly. I THOUGHT he was a nice guy untill he asked me if  wanted to go for a drink.

I said yes as I thought there would be no harm done. I thought it would just be as friends but he had other ideas as I was shortly to find out.

I went for a drink with him and he immediately began to refer to me as his girlfriend.

I didn't fancy him at all as he was very unattractive and had personal hygiene problems. Anybody normal would have told him to get lost when he started to crack on to me but being a person of low self esteem, I felt powerless to do so. I am not one to judge people on their appearance but certainly don't want to date a grotty guy as I am a very clean person myself.

He didn't leave my side after that. he was turning up at my house uninvited and even stayed at my house when he got too pissed to drive home.

The night he stayed at my house he was so drunk that he urinated in my bed. I didn't say anything because I didn't want to hurt his feelings.WTF???? I must be mental!!!

It took me three weeks to get rid of him and that was only after I asked my best friend to talk some sense into me.

During this time he borrowed money off me. I slept with him because i couldn't brinmg myself to say no and it was really disgusting because he was smelly and ugly. There's a host of other stuff that went on all because I was too much of a sap to tell him to sling his hook.

That was a year ago now and I still cringe when I think about it. It really disturbed me to think that I let it go on and didn't have the strength to stick up for myself.

In a strange way I am glad it happened because it made me realize that I have to toughen up. I am working on this now and have another job.

I have had an experience in my new job with a bully (they must be able to sense what kind of person I am)

I have however said F**k it and put in a complaint against him.

NOBODY IS EVER GOING TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME AGAIN!!!!

There you go! Wonderful. You have won the game. Just disregard what others say. You go on your own as confident as possible. Start now. Be happy that you are in this world. Be happy that you can connect to people all over the world. What else do you want? There are countless others who don't get two meals a day. We are much better off. So where is the issue? I can go on talking. I have faced all these in life. I have been able to break out of it mostly.