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I Have Ptsd, Depression and Anxiety

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,123 People

    The Good, Badd And Ugly Part 5

    The GoOd, Bad And UgLy part5 It's really hard to continue this, for me to press forward, for I have a throbbing headache from concentrating, uncontrollable trembling just reflecting, fear of the unknown, that might await me along my journeys ahead, for It's now seems as a...
    Randysdot Randysdot 51-55, M 2 Responses Oct 27, 2009

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    Sometimes it seems like no one understands.

    I feel like I'm being overdramatic when I say that, but it really does feel lonely, having Ptsd. It's bad enough to spend life being haunted by memory, but to go at it alone? That's something else entirely. I guess I'm just tired from it, is all.
    Ztun7856 Ztun7856 16-17, F Dec 6

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    Running late for work this morning.

    Heard hubby on the phone..switching between two calls, talking back and forth for two people. When he was finally done I could hear him yelling aloud about how frustrating it was. He sounded on the verge of tears. He headed to the bathroom and tossed something around loudly. At...
    Catsoutdabag Catsoutdabag 31-35, F 5 Responses Apr 3

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    My Forray Into The Darken World Beyond....

    The Drunken sailor, that should have drowned!!! the beginnings of downfall into PTSD 1   It's March 75 and My Submarine, with two others, are currently tide up to a support tender ship, in the middle of the Mediterranean .  We're to take on provisions...
    Randysdot Randysdot 51-55, M 3 Responses Oct 19, 2009

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    My name is John. I used to be a member of EP a

    while ago and got away from it. I'm an army infantryman and a combat veteran. I have been diagnosed with PTSD and have started to combat it. It is going to be a long road to recovery but I am tired of being miserable. I want my life back. I want to be happy again. Writing has...
    johnnyamerica88 johnnyamerica88 26-30, M 1 Response Mar 4

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    I Hate People

    I hate when people are like ok just come talk to me when you have a problem You do and they are like gosh you have to talk about your problems all the time and make you feel guilty and bad about it Like you just complain all the time And you're Like...yeah that's why I don't...
    Reneetodd Reneetodd 18-21, F 10 Responses Oct 16, 2013

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    I have been suffering with PTDS,

    Anxiety, and severe depression since I was a little girl. It all started when my ex boyfriend committed suicide when I was 13 years old after talking on the Phone with him that same night.. It was so hard going to his funeral. It broke my heart. My life really hasn't been the...
    Kmg1994 Kmg1994 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 18, 2013

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    I suffer from PTSD and I feel

    that I can't really live a full life because of it. I guess it would be easier to discuss if I had been in combat but my battle was with a parent. One so abusive she destroyed the "me" I was suppose to have become. The constant anxiety and depression are awful. Now that I'm 58...
    Lcjones Lcjones 56-60, F 1 Response Mar 7

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    The Good Bad And Ugly:

    OK the good, bad and the ugly This might be poorly organized sry, it's kinda like my life most of the time and i'm a bit under duress writing about it, because I've compartmentalized it away for so long, I've become good at it..... I fear losing those things in life I...
    Randysdot Randysdot 51-55, M 9 Responses Oct 26, 2009

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    Strangled

    We`re supposed to go on vacation this summer. All family will get together. Large families. I`m scared. Large crowds. People staring at me. People touching me. People talking to me. People being near me. People asking questions. The smell of their breath as they glare at me with...
    AviatorHH AviatorHH 18-21, F 5 Responses Mar 5, 2012

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    What If You Forgotten Whom You Are?

       What if you forgotten whom you are?       PTSD part 2 stayin' safe...      Growing up I've always try to be something, someone, with some type of morals      or aspirations towards being what's...
    deleted deleted 26-30 5 Responses Sep 21, 2009

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    With Wings is a group on Facebook

    which offers help and support for those who need it. It is a safe space for members to come together, make friends and help others as well as themselves. If you suffer from a mental illness, self harm or have an eating disorder then this is a place for you to come and be...
    withwingsgroup withwingsgroup 18-21, F Dec 11

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    I have many disorders

    because of my childhood and the way I grew up.
    KensleyRenee KensleyRenee 16-17, F Nov 24

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    picses2222 picses2222 13-15, F 2 Responses Sep 10

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    Short version: I was groomed

    for abuse by my father, who is a con artist and not a part of my life anymore. He kidnapped my sibling and I when we were little and we were missing for a year. Now that I am a mother I really feel for what that must have been like for her. My mother remarried several times...
    iamowl iamowl 31-35, F Nov 24

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    I think my sister is starting to hate me.

    I don't know what I did wrong and now I want to escape. She has been pointing out things that hurt me and I can't tell if she's just trying to help or is trying to hurt me. She talked to me about my relationship with my boyfriend after I trusted her enough to ask her to take me...
    Cranksta Cranksta 18-21, F Dec 1

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    And sometimes I almost welcome the panic attacks

    because they're the only time I feel alive. Most of the time I live in a haze of numbness or pure despair, depending on whether or not I have pills. At least I know I'm breathing when I panic.
    PaperStars33 PaperStars33 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 15

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    I have been battling depression

    since high school, PTSD since high school, and anxiety all my life. More recently (over the past 2.5 yrs) I have had many melt downs and have hit the breaking point at least once already. I had dealt with a break up, my mom possibly having cancer again, a pet's death, then what...
    tig1991 tig1991 22-25, F Jul 15

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    Considering checking myself into the hospital

    willingly for the first time. Recurring depressive thoughts. Not suicidal though which is nice. I just feel trapped in a box. Am I the only one?
    TheLonelyStoner95 TheLonelyStoner95 18-21, M 1 Response Nov 23

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    My Ptsd Story.

    Last year I had a complete mental meltdown. I was angry with myself. I used to cut and anytime I felt I was under emotional attack I would unleash my wrath on that person. As my psychiatrist said, I am generally a person with a positive attitude and that is what kept me going...
    DcreativeBUG DcreativeBUG 22-25 4 Responses Apr 7, 2013

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    Feeling like cutting myself again.

    I don't know where it comes from. It's just something that screams out from my soul. I wonder if it's practice for suicide or if I just like the thought of hurting myself. I'm a monster. It's too late for me. I can't stand being in my own life. And I hate myself for feeling that...
    Cranksta Cranksta 18-21, F Dec 1

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    I wish I could stop feeling alone.

    Even when I'm surrounded with people I feel detached and misunderstood. My friends just seem like they've given up on me. I just don't know what to do anymore.
    SilentRider SilentRider 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 31

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    So it just happens in the middle of class.

    Nothing really is needed to trigger them. But i will be doing fine one second and the next i feel like i can't breathe. It feels like i'm being attacked or something but there's nothing i can do about it because it's on the inside. But at the same time i feel like walls are...
    chemically99 chemically99 13-15, F 2 Responses Jul 13

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    My dad has been talking about sending me to a

    residential treatment center to get help for trauma/PTSD that hasn't been dealt with for the past few years. I used to live with an alcoholic mother who was abusive (emotional with physical and sexual incidents) and though I don't live with her anymore after Child Protective...
    experiences683 experiences683 13-15, F 3 Responses Oct 11

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    For those who share my struggles,

    writing helps a LOT. It doesn't necessarily have to be physical writing, like with pen and paper. Electronically doing so, like on a blog or a private electronic journal, are just as helpful.
    AlexTheWordSmith AlexTheWordSmith 22-25, F 3 Responses Nov 4

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    What to do when you can't talk about it?

    Will it ever subside? The flashbacks, the anger and hostility. Heavily medicated for other mental illnesses, but there are none to take this away. I had ECT and lost a good portion of my memory, but not this. How do I go on?
    howlingfantods howlingfantods 22-25, F 2 Responses Aug 6

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    Road Block'S At Every Turn

    This is one of those random things I decided to post on a whim… I posted a similar version of this on a different group, but wanted to share it here as well. Unless you have suffered from anxiety, depression, or panic attacks it’s really hard to explain. For me, there is...
    HayBail HayBail 22-25, F 3 Responses Mar 24, 2013

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    I can deal with my emotions

    but right now PTSD is rearing it's head back into my life. I hate looking at the exit signs in a building or having to sleep next to a window. I decided not to be medicated because my emotions could be magnified. When my emotions are medicated I'm a complete and utter mess.
    thelost87 thelost87 26-30, F Apr 19

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    Causes And Solutions For Anxiety, PTSD, Depression

    Obviously there is also chronic stress, war, poverty, and all manner of other external oppressions that can cause anxiety. But aside from this, which we may have little or no control over, I believe there are only 3 causes for persistent anxiety problems (lasting more than a few...
    Ajushi Ajushi 31-35, M 1 Response Nov 19, 2013

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    What I'm slowly realizing about PTSD (and

    subsequent depression and anxiety) is that it doesn't always happen right after said traumatizing event. It can sometimes take years to develop or manifest. I think in my case, the adult in me is trying to cope with the trauma that the child had to face. It's a long, difficult...
    AlexTheWordSmith AlexTheWordSmith 22-25, F 2 Responses Nov 4

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    I'm 40 years old, I was a firefighter

    for over 12 years. I had a call that involved a mother and her kids. It was a murder/suicide, I knew the mother, dad and the children. I have never been the same since. I had my own home, a fiancé who was the love of my life. It's all gone now! I just want someone to...
    ndirishfan ndirishfan 36-40, M 1 Response Dec 1

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    I'm also a big, big fan of inspirational quotes.

    Yeah, they're cheesy, but when you're walking down a dark path and it looks like you're walking alone, a few simple words can make a big difference. "Fear not. We are of the nature of the lion, and can not descend to the destruction of mice and such small beasts." - Elizabeth I...
    AlexTheWordSmith AlexTheWordSmith 22-25, F Nov 4

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    My gf is concerned I take too many meds

    and about drug interactions. I hate being dependent on meds but when I tried to cut back it was really bad. I am upset because I was on half the dose of Effeczor and no Lamictal for the past 5 years. Then this summer out of nowhere I crashed badly. Was non-functional. So my...
    mslvr01 mslvr01 46-50, M 3 Responses Nov 25

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    Lost In Life

    In 2009 my husband and I had twins. We lived in Virginia on a military base and in 2010 we lost one of our twins when he was taking a nap. When I called 911 I was giving CPR to my 3 month old child during the time it took for the ambulance to get there. We went to the hospital...
    lostsoul2010 lostsoul2010 22-25, F 5 Responses Sep 28, 2013

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    I'm Foxaaaay Again!

    This will be a very shallow post but I want to share it with the great people of EP.Well I went through a very stressful time. It lasted for about 5 years and you know, no matter how strong you are or how positive you are towards life, the pain starts to show on your face. They...
    DcreativeBUG DcreativeBUG 22-25 2 Responses Jul 19, 2013

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    Energy drinks bring me to another level.

    It's as if I'm on this high without being high. Nothing matters and I can be "happy" for a little while. I used to drink them like they were going out of stock...but quit after I realized how much I was spending. I still crave them and do have them sometimes...but recently I...
    jackjack600 jackjack600 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 20

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    I was diagnosed with Depression

    and Anxiety when I was 17 years old. I have been taking medicine ever since. When I was twenty something happened that I will not broadcast in a story. As an after effect of that I have ptsd . I can't be around people or things that remind me of the event. I get jumpy when...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Oct 21

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    Ptsd

    I was in a tornado and it brought up PTSD from all parts of my life and fears along with it. I use to use and drink and haven't once thought about it after all this. They did put me on a pill I use to abuse and it somehow helps when in panic mode. I think the important thing is...
    jupiter71 jupiter71 36-40, T Mar 19, 2012

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    I should be going to a psychiatrist (or

    whatever, phycologist, idk&idc) but I'm too stubborn. Mind over matter... Right?
    picses2222 picses2222 13-15, F 2 Responses Nov 13

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    I Want To Remember

    Can someone with experience please offer input? Both my therapist and my psychiatrist strongly believe I have PTSD or some form of repressed childhood trauma and I don't have any idea why they think this or where it is coming from. They suggest I do hypnotherapy to recover...
    chiodios chiodios 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 7, 2012

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    I think my biggest thing is my fear of not

    being in control. Whenever I start to feel as though I'm losing control, or if I feel as though control is slipping out of my hands, I get anxiety/panic attacks, which I think are caused by the PTSD, and these attacks then lead to bouts of depression. I feel one coming on now...
    AlexTheWordSmith AlexTheWordSmith 22-25, F Nov 5

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    Yoga is helping me a lot though.

    And also toning up my bum, and that's always good. :-D :)
    AlexTheWordSmith AlexTheWordSmith 22-25, F Nov 4

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    Today was really rough

    for me. I am a mother of 3 who decided to finish her degree, I have done pretty well thus far maintaining grants, scholarships, and financial aid to get me through school, part of the reason why I left college initially is because I financially couldn't afford it anymore. I am 2...
    PhoenixLF PhoenixLF 26-30, F 1 Response Sep 19

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    Okay. So I always have to keep my ears covered

    because I feel like someone (or something) is going to scream in my ear and my back also has to be covered constantly as well. Anybody else have this problem?
    picses2222 picses2222 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 13

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    I just read this post on Facebook.

    Just wanted to share it with you people. "I'm a therapist and keep this poster in my waiting room, apparently it saved a few lives: I don't like the phrase "a cry for help." I just don't like how it sounds. When somebody says to me, "I'm thinking about suicide, I have a plan...
    Gemz2411 Gemz2411 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 13

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    i don't mind you fingering my play dough

    I don't mind you fingering my play dough! Hi, I had PTSD and a brain injury for a while now like 13 years really 30 total for ptsd, but A really great thing happens when you type me a note or comment, I get to dream.   Dreams are those things that are addictively...
    Randysdot Randysdot 51-55, M 4 Responses Nov 8, 2009

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    Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in

    the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.
    smilemore123 smilemore123 16-17, F 1 Response Dec 6, 2013

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    Are there any ways to fight off

    or prevent anxiety/panic attacks? Now that I've targeted exactly what causes them, how can I use that to help me?
    AlexTheWordSmith AlexTheWordSmith 22-25, F 4 Responses Nov 5

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    This is my very first experience post.

    I grew up as a military brat, my dad was in the Air Force, and we moved every two-three years. When I was 3 we moved overseas and I haven't lived in the US again until last year for college. I have had chronic depression since 2001 when my family moved from South Korea to...
    Alemiir Alemiir 18-21, F Oct 15

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    I just wait for each day to be over.

    I sleep in late to waste time. I sit in the dark during the day. Then I go to bed early and lie in the darkness.
    Kitty4190 Kitty4190 22-25, F 3 Responses Jan 20

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    I Am Me

    I remember everytime they would put a label on me. The first was victim, and I was a victim of hate and rape. I add the hate first because my biological father hated me for being a girl. I was then raped at thirteen. I was forced into counseling. I didn't believe I belonged there...
    DarkLiela DarkLiela 18-21, F Apr 27, 2013

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