I Have Ptsd, Depression and Anxiety

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,415 People

    God im lost im alone im in pain my spirit is

    broken my mind is gone as i scream pulling my hair out im beyond damaged there is no "fixing" this there is no light at the end of my tunnel i am scared and shaken i am terrified I need hope a helping hand someone to lean on to love who loves me back! i miss my child!!! my...
    KatyaCrow KatyaCrow
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Dec 27, 2015

    I feel like I'm not capable of fixing anything.

    I was abused as a child, and I'm still dealing with the fallout from that. I want to be over what happened, but the reality is; the trauma didn't develop in just one day, and I can't expect myself to repair the damage in that amount of time. However, I feel like time is running...
    Shovelfighter Shovelfighter
    26-30, M
    2 Responses Dec 29, 2015
    meowkachu meowkachu
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Nov 6, 2015

    Sometimes I just remember what happened to me

    and I think "did that actually happen? No it didn't... Oh my god yes it did." And I start to have a panic attack. I think if I wasn't on medication I would be institutionalized.
    deleted deleted
    Nov 30, 2015

    Right now I just want to scream,

    OMG I'm a nutcase , Right now I just want to cry soo hard so I can sleep my thoughts are going a mile a min literally,I have not been able to get to sleep until extremely late in the morning for the last 2 weeks ,and everyday has been the same for most of my life I'm either...
    RedsSaphire RedsSaphire
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Feb 2, 2015

    I was diagnosed with anxiety

    and depression when I was 22 I'm one of the most hardest working people I know but I can't handle having people who are above me yell at me. Its really embarrassing but I start crying involuntarily. I hate it because I just want to do my job. Sometimes the more I try to fight it...
    MotorcycleKate MotorcycleKate
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Mar 25

    Tonight I was doing nothing except sitting on

    the bed when I was suddenly overwhelmed with the need to get the hell out of that room. It felt like I was suffocating. So I got up and started running and could only apparently go in circles and eventually i had slammed my head into a cinder block wall
    damagedwings damagedwings
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Jan 2

    I've had mild PTSD for a few years.

    It all started out when me and now my ex-husband bought our first home in a nice suburban neighborhood with wide streets in summer of 2012. We closed in August and 2 days after we move in we discover the AC units wasn't working right so we couldn't use it. We haven't gotten...
    Yinhx Yinhx
    31-35, F
    1 Response Mar 13

    I know I'm just baggage

    for my mother and brother. They love me and I love them, but if I wasn't around then they wouldn't have to worry so much about me and they wouldn't have had to cry over me. I don't deserve such loving people for all that I've done to them. I don't want them to have to deal with...
    Flowerchild666 Flowerchild666
    18-21, F
    1 Response Feb 15

    After the Military I went to the Elks Club with

    my Family. Lucky enough, that month there was an article from the Vet Center claiming to help Vets with getting back to normal life, readjusting. I was struggling, so I called, made an appointment, started therapy. It was only then, that I was informed of my fears. I have PTSD...
    ACTX013 ACTX013
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Nov 25, 2015

    I've been battling these 3 things

    for 4 years now. The PTSD for a little less than 3 years though. It's hard admitting it but I have to. I've overcome so much, thanks to counseling and going to the hospital for it all. I stopped counseling and medications about a year or so ago, but have gotten back into a slump...
    bellexoxxx bellexoxxx
    16-17, F
    Mar 13

    I think about what happened constantly.

    It doesn't make me freak out like it used too, but i feel like i haven't moved forward in a while. =(
    Gureiify Gureiify
    26-30, T
    1 Response Feb 10

    I'm 40 years old, I was a firefighter

    for over 12 years. I had a call that involved a mother and her kids. It was a murder/suicide, I knew the mother, dad and the children. I have never been the same since. I had my own home, a fiancé who was the love of my life. It's all gone now! I just want someone to...
    ndirishfan ndirishfan
    41-45, M
    3 Responses Dec 1, 2014

    I Hate People

    I hate when people are like ok just come talk to me when you have a problem You do and they are like gosh you have to talk about your problems all the time and make you feel guilty and bad about it Like you just complain all the time And you're Like...yeah that's why I don't...
    Reneetodd Reneetodd
    18-21, F
    9 Responses Oct 16, 2013

    Yoga is helping me a lot though.

    And also toning up my bum, and that's always good. :-D :)
    AlexTheWordSmith AlexTheWordSmith
    22-25, F
    Nov 4, 2014
    Gureiify Gureiify
    26-30, T
    Feb 12

    My name is John. I used to be a member of EP a

    while ago and got away from it. I'm an army infantryman and a combat veteran. I have been diagnosed with PTSD and have started to combat it. It is going to be a long road to recovery but I am tired of being miserable. I want my life back. I want to be happy again. Writing has...
    johnnyamerica88 johnnyamerica88
    26-30, M
    Mar 4, 2014

    hi guys, so in the past year I have been

    diagnosed with ptsd, dissociative amnesia, major depression, and anxiety, I have a year old shepherd mix who has a year left of training to be my service dog to assist me in my episodes, however even with him, I feel so alone ....how do you get past...the past? when all you want...
    Howlingsoulofthewolf Howlingsoulofthewolf
    18-21, F
    1 Response Mar 11

    having a rough time, listening to people scream

    at each other but I will get botched at if I try to go for a walk so I would rather avoid that.
    Shadowmantle Shadowmantle
    31-35, F
    Dec 9, 2015

    I have ptsd, depression

    and anxiety ... Been put on Meds been shown to many doctors ... But the best cure I have ever found is by dealing with it ... Yes I still get bad depression and yea I still have PTSD but it hasn't been that bad .. My anxiety has went down ....... All I did was embraced my past...
    william2490 william2490
    26-30, M
    2 Responses Mar 7, 2015

    Sometimes it seems like no one understands.

    I feel like I'm being overdramatic when I say that, but it really does feel lonely, having Ptsd. It's bad enough to spend life being haunted by memory, but to go at it alone? That's something else entirely. I guess I'm just tired from it, is all.
    Ztun7856 Ztun7856
    18-21, F
    Dec 6, 2014

    My Ptsd Story.

    Last year I had a complete mental meltdown. I was angry with myself. I used to cut and anytime I felt I was under emotional attack I would unleash my wrath on that person. As my psychiatrist said, I am generally a person with a positive attitude and that is what kept me going...
    DcreativeBUG DcreativeBUG
    4 Responses Apr 7, 2013

    Lost In Life

    In 2009 my husband and I had twins. We lived in Virginia on a military base and in 2010 we lost one of our twins when he was taking a nap. When I called 911 I was giving CPR to my 3 month old child during the time it took for the ambulance to get there. We went to the hospital...
    lostsoul2010 lostsoul2010
    26-30, F
    4 Responses Sep 28, 2013

    An actual experience I had: A friend of mine

    who recently returned home from the army confided in me that he had PTSD. I helped him through some tough days, teaching him better ways to cope and he actually improved. He then asked how I knew what to do for PTSD and I explained to him I actually had it myself. It took a...
    MsBree01 MsBree01
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Dec 29, 2014

    So last night I think I might have had a mild

    case of anxiety attack. I'm never had one that I was sure of but basically most of the time I feel like there's always something to do and never have enough time of the day to do it. I know I cant do everything every single day but i am a planner, and when my list of things don...
    Yinhx Yinhx
    31-35, F
    1 Response Mar 23

    Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in

    the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.
    smilemore123 smilemore123
    18-21, F
    1 Response Dec 6, 2013

    I can't go thru another night like last night.

    I came very close to turning my head off permanently. I'm a disaster
    damagedwings damagedwings
    36-40, F
    Dec 11, 2015
    majordepressivedisorder majordepressivedisorder
    26-30, F
    1 Response Nov 21, 2015

    I was diagnosed with Depression

    and Anxiety when I was 17 years old. I have been taking medicine ever since. When I was twenty something happened that I will not broadcast in a story. As an after effect of that I have ptsd . I can't be around people or things that remind me of the event. I get jumpy when...
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Oct 21, 2014

    What I'm slowly realizing about PTSD (and

    subsequent depression and anxiety) is that it doesn't always happen right after said traumatizing event. It can sometimes take years to develop or manifest. I think in my case, the adult in me is trying to cope with the trauma that the child had to face. It's a long, difficult...
    AlexTheWordSmith AlexTheWordSmith
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Nov 4, 2014

    Hi, I am Mike and I served two tours in Iraq.

    My first deployment was out of Camp Hovey Korea in 2004-05. I was with 2nd ID and we were attached with the 1st Marines in Ramadi Iraq. My second time I was deployed from Fort Lewis in 2007. Anyway, I experianced alot of crazy things and after my service I came back to Ohio and...
    flemin37 flemin37
    2 Responses Aug 24, 2015

    I'm upset because my psychiatrist wants to wean

    me either way down on my Xanax or I think he really wants to get me off of it for good. This is NOT good! I need that Xanax! I'm an extremely anxious person & sometimes I need it just to get out to go to grocery. Like right now, I took my half pill of Xanax when it used to be a...
    Bluetangerine Bluetangerine
    46-50, F
    1 Response Feb 10

    I Want To Remember

    Can someone with experience please offer input? Both my therapist and my psychiatrist strongly believe I have PTSD or some form of repressed childhood trauma and I don't have any idea why they think this or where it is coming from. They suggest I do hypnotherapy to recover...
    chiodios chiodios
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Nov 7, 2012


    We`re supposed to go on vacation this summer. All family will get together. Large families. I`m scared. Large crowds. People staring at me. People touching me. People talking to me. People being near me. People asking questions. The smell of their breath as they glare at me with...
    AviatorHH AviatorHH
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Mar 5, 2012

    I'm off to my cognitive processing class

    for trauma survivors. It's changing the way I think. I'm hopeful it will change the way I live too....eventually
    goodwitchofthenorth goodwitchofthenorth
    36-40, F
    Jan 13

    I just read this post on Facebook.

    Just wanted to share it with you people. "I'm a therapist and keep this poster in my waiting room, apparently it saved a few lives: I don't like the phrase "a cry for help." I just don't like how it sounds. When somebody says to me, "I'm thinking about suicide, I have a plan...
    Gemz2411 Gemz2411
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Aug 13, 2014

    I suffer from all 3 daily.

    I have flashbacks, nightmares, sometimes even panic attacks. I know what happened is in the past, but sometimes it makes it hard to go by day to day with it. It makes you a strong person yes, and I know that there's others out there that have had the same, but it still sucks.
    Ejoyh97 Ejoyh97
    18-21, F
    1 Response Feb 28

    Anxiety includes caring too much about

    everything. Depression includes not caring much about anything. When you have both, it's hell. Add in ptsd, of course, and you have a really fun mixture (not).
    deleted deleted
    5 Responses Jan 21

    You want to know what sucks balls?

    Constantly having intrusive thoughts of wanting to die or end my life. Even on medication and being in therapy I think I have just had the last emotional blow that I can handle. I feel myself slipping, I can't hold back the tears anymore. I can't keep the pain at bay and I feel...
    deleted deleted
    5 Responses Mar 4

    I just wait for each day to be over.

    I sleep in late to waste time. I sit in the dark during the day. Then I go to bed early and lie in the darkness.
    Kitty4190 Kitty4190
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Jan 20, 2014

    My 15 year old son was raped

    and has since been diagnosed with PTSD, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and Major Depression. He's all over the place with his feelings. This mom here is so overwhelmed. One minute he loves me, and in the blink of an eye, he hates everything about me. He has major panic...
    Arubaskies Arubaskies
    41-45, F
    4 Responses Jan 26

    So i'm a combat vet. 8 years in the Marine

    Corps, 4 in the Army. Served in Afghanistan as an Explosive Ordnance Disposal team leader. Last combat tour was 2012-2013. Was "chaptered" (read kicked out) out of the Army in 2014. Lots of anger over that. Currently working at the VA as a janitor. Lots of anger over that. I...
    tracerjpn2k tracerjpn2k
    31-35, M
    1 Response Jan 1

    Was diagnosed with symptoms of ptsd

    and trauma, 3 years ago.i've been going to therapy for 4 years. different therapists. I find therapy helpful. The struggle can be difficult during certain moments, moreso than others. I would say flashbacks and memories are the most difficult thing.Anything can trigger it off, a...
    mixieloca mixieloca
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Mar 13, 2015
    picses2222 picses2222
    16-17, F
    2 Responses Sep 10, 2014

    For those who share my struggles,

    writing helps a LOT. It doesn't necessarily have to be physical writing, like with pen and paper. Electronically doing so, like on a blog or a private electronic journal, are just as helpful.
    AlexTheWordSmith AlexTheWordSmith
    22-25, F
    Nov 4, 2014

    I am an old man...."old enough to know better.

    ..young enough to try"...At 54 I discovered that I have PTSD. At 56 I have a long long retrospective upon which I can draw daily. Some days it seems as though I am being devoured by a wad of emotions that defy description. Now and then...I do have moments of clarity. I can see...
    Runawayjoe Runawayjoe
    56-60, M
    Mar 12

    For the past few weeks I've been too scared to

    go to sleep. My PTSD has been bringing about some awful dreams and every time I think about going to sleep I have an anxiety attack. I usually only get 2-3 hours of sleep at a time and even then I always wake up in a panic.
    Tanya2147 Tanya2147
    26-30, T
    2 Responses Oct 15, 2015

    I haven't been tested to see

    if I truly have PTSD, but I just might have it. These flashbacks I have of the horrible things I've gone through shock and terrify me all over again. I get super jumpy and anxious. My heart beats so fast and I lose all focus of what's around me. I relive it all over and over...
    mentallyhigh mentallyhigh
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Aug 31, 2015

    What If You Forgotten Whom You Are?

       What if you forgotten whom you are?       PTSD part 2 stayin' safe...      Growing up I've always try to be something, someone, with some type of morals      or aspirations towards being what's...
    deleted deleted
    5 Responses Sep 21, 2009

    I was trained early on by my mother to take

    abuse and not fight back. First husband abusive. Second husband abusive. A month ago granddaughter abusive.Didnt even occur to me to defend myself. Had years of counseling. I'm not in a good place.
    Brooke2000 Brooke2000
    56-60, F
    Jan 9

    http://www.change.org/p/ep-keep-ep-open-don-t-close-ep For those of you who love EP as much as I do, we only have until April 21 before the site shuts down. I know I am putting out this message a lot to try to get as many signatures as possible. Every one of them counts!! We...
    Yinhx Yinhx
    31-35, F
    Mar 24

    The truth is I'm not comfortable talking about

    where it all comes from. But it stems from years of being with an alcoholic emotionally, physically, and sexually abusive father.
    justbnatural justbnatural
    22-25, M
    1 Response Jun 29, 2015

    Please read, I have a question

    for anyone who suffers from mental disorders. But first, a little bit (briefly) about my mental health history: I was diagnosed with ADHD, depression, and anxiety at age 9 by a specialist in her field - pediatric psychiatry. I had numerous tests done as a child by doctors and...
    ChantelSurvived ChantelSurvived
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jan 3, 2015

    No Longer What is this thing

    that we call life? I see. I breath. I touch. And yet I do not feel alive... I've never felt it much. Pain, a closer friend to me Than joy will ever be. My will, my drive, my strength... A distant memory. Time, it slowly passes; Each minute, like the last. I despise my own...
    Red1983 Red1983
    31-35, F
    Feb 26

    I Am Me

    I remember everytime they would put a label on me. The first was victim, and I was a victim of hate and rape. I add the hate first because my biological father hated me for being a girl. I was then raped at thirteen. I was forced into counseling. I didn't believe I belonged there...
    DarkLiela DarkLiela
    22-25, F
    Apr 27, 2013

    Today is a bad day...

    . I had nightmares all last night, flashbacks. I woke up crying and wanting to die. Wanting to take my own life. I feel trapped in a life that I created by allowing a certain person to **** on me over and over. I allowed him to treat me as a fuckdoll/doormat. I have always been...
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses Mar 10
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