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I Have Ptsd

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 10,508 People

    Im a child abuse survivor :'( i feel

    so lonely unloved and Life seem to énd for me
    emmadarko emmadarko 22-25, F 2 Responses Jul 26

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    Right this is the first time I've used this

    and gunna just get this out there that I have PTSD, damn that feels good to even get that out on paper 😊, Basically I was stabbed 3 times by a gang who thought I was someone who stole their weed, now 3 years later and hundreds of stitches later I still wake up in panic and...
    thomasxoxo thomasxoxo 18-21, M 2 Responses Apr 6

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    I suffer from PTSD. I was raped at gunpoint

    when I was 24 years old. The triggers associated with my PTSD are ridiculous. PTSD has managed to cause major trust issues and destroy many relationships whether they be romantic, frienships, or family. No Body understands how hopeless lonely and hypervigiliant this disorder can...
    Amyk1979 Amyk1979 36-40, F 4 Responses Aug 19

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    I've started realizing how affected my life is

    by my PTSD. I guess when you've had it since u were a young child you get use to it. Honestly the feelings I felt, all the different bad emktio s with flash backs or anxiety over being exposed to triggers that I knew would bring on flashbacks, I thought everyone was like that. I...
    BeautifullySickkk BeautifullySickkk 31-35, F 4 Responses Aug 18

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    My Boyfriend Killed Himself In Front Of Me.

    I just joined this group, so I'm not sure what it's really all about... I guess  this is the part where I share my story, so here goes... Two years ago when i was 16, my boyfriend shot himself in front of me. We had been dating on/off for about two and a half years. We were...
    jayk09 jayk09 18-21, F 58 Responses Feb 14, 2010

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    More people need to talk about PTSD

    when they have it. I tried for so long to "keep it together". Then at work one day I was making tea for me and my friend when I just started crying uncontrollably. She sat me down and I told her everything. She cuddled me and said she wished I'd told her sooner so she could help...
    strawberryblonde89 strawberryblonde89 26-30, F 5 Responses Jan 5

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    I was diagnose the other day with Ptsd.

    .. I was sexually abused for years.. also attack by two guys along with my abuser ..My parent were told by someone who help me they did nothing .. nothing was done...i didnt feel safe.. That's when it all went down hill..I became a recluse and i was find in my home until someone...
    destinyrose878 destinyrose878 26-30, F 3 Responses Aug 13

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    PTSD, doubled up with anxiety

    and depression, is a hell of a combination. I had always had anxiety and depression both, as far back as I can remember. Then being attacked at work started the ptsd. My abusive ex fiancé didn't help much, always telling me how much of a loser and piece of **** I was, and the...
    pag089 pag089 26-30, M 1 Response Jul 24

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    Info On Ptsd & Did

    What is PTSD?   Posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is an anxiety disorder that a person may develop after experiencing or witnessing an extreme, overwhelming traumatic event during which they felt intense fear, helplessness, or horror. The dominant features of...
    Whateverrrrr Whateverrrrr 36-40, F 8 Responses Dec 19, 2010

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    About Ptsd

    I have studied a lot about this, being a scientifically minded person, since I was diagnosed in my 20s. If you have questions, please feel free to ask me, and I promise, what I don't know, I won't make up :) There are some clear indicators, also physical reasons why those with...
    simplygirl simplygirl 46-50, F 10 Responses Jun 24, 2012

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    Funny Thing They Are, Those Brains of Ours

    the brain is a mysterious thing, it is.  considering the technology developed in the last 100 yrs we still know very little about it. i was in an accident in feb '04.  i developed a 'condition' due to the injury.  one of the side affects being memory loss. ...
    AbbyNormal AbbyNormal 31-35, F 6 Responses Aug 29, 2007

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    You know it never seems to end

    or go away . Last week I thought I needed to be hospitalized because I was so afraid of the memories, then I just pushed them back down and away. Today I am suffering with the memories of my mother beating me nearly every night at age 10 11 and 12 and then in the morning it was...
    Audg911 Audg911 46-50, F 3 Responses Jul 26

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    I couldn't sleep at all.

    I literally laid in bed crying from the intense flashbacks I was having. I've even been having these audible hallucinations where my nephew will be crying really badly, so I run to check on him and he's fine.. I'm such a wreck these days! :(
    KoopyKoop KoopyKoop 18-21, F Jun 5

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    So I have this problem where

    whenever I have one bad experience associated with a certain object or place or even person, my natural instinct tells me to avoid those things altogether. A lot of them aren't even that bad. For example, when I was 4 years old, I was at the airport going to fly to Nashville...
    chasetheweirdo8 chasetheweirdo8 13-15, M 6 Responses Apr 3

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    I was molested by my grand father

    for 4 years from late 13 years old to 18 years old. I still remember him tormenting me every night . I have horrible nightmares and none of my friends believed me. actually an ex raped me because he thought I was weak. I tried to put it in school but the school told me if I did...
    kundabada kundabada 22-25, F 4 Responses Jul 20

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    dulcivoluptas dulcivoluptas 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 25

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    I can still see you in there.

    I smell it too. I didn't know there were flies at night, but I guess you must've been in there a while… your face was so eaten up with maggots, I should've known. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm so ******* sorry…
    Rexxey Rexxey 18-21, M 1 Response 5 days ago

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    Well actually I dissociate,

    which can actually be quite handy in some situations
    7lulu 7lulu 41-45, F 4 Responses Jul 25

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    A Soldier Returns Home, Honest Account Of Living With Ptsd. Psychology Homework July 2010

    17July2010 By Charles Scott In this weeks homework assignment I was tasked with the objective to explain a behavior that would be considered strange, unusual and/or abnormal. I have chosen to recall my own experiences and attempt to explain the cause and effects of Post...
    autonomous138 autonomous138 26-30, M 2 Responses Jul 22, 2010

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    I can't go more than a few nights without

    having a nightmare about things I've seen, or things I've done. 90% of it is things I experienced while serving overseas but the rest is just petty bullshit from the civilian world that somehow really bothers me. I'm not afraid of anything but myself. I don't have any emotions...
    Sinatra616 Sinatra616 31-35, M 1 Response Jul 17

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    And it hurts so much.

    The flashbacks, the memories, the nightmares....it never ends. I don't want to be stuck like this any more. My whole body is in pain. I can't cry any more. I feel nothing.
    deleted deleted 26-30 5 Responses Aug 9

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    I have ptsd... This is the second time I've

    actually admitted it out loud. First time was to my roommates last year... I remember one saying, "But you act so normal!"... Or do I? Maybe i've learnt to just cover it up well. I saw a psychologist for 5 straight years (from age 13 to 18)... It did help; from sleeping 2hrs...
    khayati khayati 22-25, F 4 Responses Feb 17, 2014

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    I'm still in ptsd recovery,

    even years after the event. A lot of triggers I've been treated for and have moved past, for the most part. The one I can't escape or even work with is night time. I had to be strong all day because of the kids. I had to be strong in the evening, because of the wife. But after...
    omgwut omgwut 41-45, M 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I was told I have PTSD around August 2014,

    along with depression and anxiety... The doctor/counselor actually told me it's a pretty severe case of all 3. It stems from my childhood, along with me being a firefighter. I guess you can still say I don't believe this is true. A part of me does... but the other part is...
    Firefighter2893 Firefighter2893 22-25, M 4 Responses Mar 30

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    I'm just getting out of an abusive marriage of

    almost seven years. This last incident I came closer to death then he has ever brought me. I took our two kids and left soon as I was released from the hospital.It was the hardest decision of my life but I know the right one. I have tried to avoid all emotions connected with him...
    deleted deleted 26-30 5 Responses May 2

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    Unfortunatly i had before i had.

    Due to child abuse and combat. Docs solution is drugs drugs and more drugs. I gave up on the VA. Bud Light and isolation is much safer and not drugs.
    Averageguy41011 Averageguy41011 41-45, M 5 Responses Jul 19

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    I'm a survivor of sexually,

    physically,mentally abused by family,police,ex. I posted ''I'm looking for survivor like me ''couple of times here or another groups in a year.. I'm appriciate for kindness. But i personally i don't want to share my very personal sensitve memory,trouma for EVERYONE. I choose...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Apr 21

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    I constantly struggle between being the victim

    and trying to be above that. My anger gets the best of me a lot of the times. Past demons.
    SkylerAsh SkylerAsh 18-21, M 3 Responses Aug 6

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    Just had a couple flashbacks not long ago.

    ..it's inducing insomnia but I don't know if I really want sleep now. Just seems like it would be miserable if I get triggered again..
    FreightTrainOG FreightTrainOG 18-21, M Aug 15

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    I was diagnosed with PTSD in 2014

    because of the gang rape I went through and I get flash back of it when I sleep every now and then it was horrible to go through and the flash backs make me think it's the same night like I'm back there going through it again.
    kmccrady12653 kmccrady12653 22-25, F 5 Responses Mar 28

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    during day say the things

    that are in your mind so you dont go aleep with them annoying you
    Jbj1 Jbj1 31-35, F 2 Responses Aug 9

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    Visual Aid

    I created this to give people some idea what it feels like for me to be slammed with PTSD.
    Konrad Konrad 22-25, M 7 Responses May 16, 2009

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    The other day I googled map my childhood home.

    Im not sure why I did. I guess I wanted to evoke some kind of emotion from myself and I felt an immense pain of sadness and loneliness. The kind of suffering that the 11 year old me can only imagine and I wanted to cry. They were so unfair to me.
    Just1n Just1n 18-21, M 2 days ago

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    I don't get embarrassed easily,

    so it doesn't happen often. But a few minutes ago I was playing Mortal Kombat with some friends and I flashed back to when I was a little kid. I would sneak out of bed at night and play games when my parents were asleep, but one time my dad woke up and started yelling at me...
    DreamWarriorBlake DreamWarriorBlake 22-25, M 2 Responses Aug 13

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    I always have nightmares of my father

    when he beat me and my brother he broke several bones in my body and we couldn't get him in jail because he's the "sheriff" but I no longer see him or speak to him even though he tries to reconnect to me.
    restlessghost restlessghost 16-17, M 4 Responses Jul 27

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    Hello. I do not suffer from PTSD

    but am friends with someone who does and in his case it's actually C'PTSD. I would like to help him and provide him good advice on socializing but I'm totally 'new' to mental health illness. So I would very much appretiate if any of you guys could help me help him. SO, he's a...
    eternal22talibat eternal22talibat 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 18

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    Admitting

    I have been in denial for many years that I have PTSD. I have been in and out of the military since 1985. Uncle Sam seems to think that Ski is needed when the country is in trouble. I have been in 8 different combat zones in my life in the military. I have seen and had to do so...
    skiinkaf skiinkaf 41-45, M 8 Responses Oct 8, 2011

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    Most days I wake up feeling tortured.

    I have dreams and nightmares filled with pain and torture. I have physical pain that shows in my nightmares as torture. I wake up in a strange mindset relieved it was just a dream yet feeling tortured and wishing to end my life and end my misery.
    SoulCoffee SoulCoffee 26-30, M 2 Responses Aug 9

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    PTSD is ******* awful.

    I hope someday I can overcome it . I finished therapy at a free clinic a year ago and so far it's been OK. I got a job and a fiance and everything . but I always relive my past every night. does anyone have advice on how to make it stop?
    kundabada kundabada 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 21

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    I was abused in my early childhood

    and my birth parents were always drunk. And one day my birth father flipped and stabbed my birth mother again and again and somehow she got a gun and shot him. And by the time anyone found me the next day, they were both dead. And I witnessed it all.
    SJ110 SJ110 13-15, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I Need Help Tonight!

    MY wife went to sleep hours ago, when she did I joined her....As I sleeped I was dreaming of cars and women I guess like most men. In this dream I heard a bang like a gun shoot..When I looked at the red head that was thereit wasn't her but a solider and he was...
    longgun longgun 31-35, M 10 Responses Aug 8, 2008

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    School And Dating Does It

    i was abused at school for many years as a kids by many women..then again i had to deal with abuse and racism in the dating world from 2009 to 2012.im just here to vent..i was a normal guy,but after dating for so many years and having to deal with all those lies and let downs...
    irongrenadier irongrenadier 26-30, M 4 Responses Feb 8, 2012

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    i faced one of my biggest triggers not long ago.

    of water, flashbacks and panic attacks came but the more i fought it for control easier it became. the trigger is still there but it doesnt trigger anything anymore. i had to work a fishing boat for a month to get that. it sucked worse then any other episode ive had in the past...
    stormofself stormofself 18-21, M 2 Responses 6 days ago

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    When I was almost four years old I saw a dead

    that's been left on the streets. I was red and swollen and had the had the worst smell you could imagine. Apparently, we had a neighbour who suffered from a mental illness. So when her child passed away, she had no idea what to do with the body so she put it in a bag and just...
    wallflower01 wallflower01 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 20

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    The Accident

    My name is Cat and I am currently fifteen years old. I remember this event more vividly than probably any day of my life. This is the story of the traumatic event that caused my PTSD. The date was November 11, 2006. I was nine years old at the time and there was no school for me...
    Catemily7797 Catemily7797 18-21, F 6 Responses Jan 4, 2013

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    "So Go On, Infect Me. Go On And Scare Me To Death. I'll Be The Victim; You'll Be The Voice In My Head."

    . She spoke of doorknobs once, but I don't remember what she said. I don't remember, was there horror? Was it so chilling, that the blood left their faces? So pallid and grey. Don't touch them, erase their smiles from your mind. You know they'll leave you here, eat you here...
    SheistheLorax SheistheLorax 18-21, F 4 Responses Nov 9, 2010